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Hi,
Spent a couple of days in Granada. In the parc in front Hotel Alhambra is enough game. When it is not allowed to bring girls to your hotel room, ask for this complex of houses, with mirrors all over in the rooms. There's also another complex but without the mirrors. I'm sorry I forgot the names, but they are near the "beach" i.e. la playa of the lake.
i recently spent a week in granada. i stayed at the hotel alhambra, paying $32 daily. there are many cheaper places in the $15 a day range, but they did not have air conditioning. this hotel is in the center of town, right across from the park. visitors are not allowed in room until 11pm unless you tip the doorman or sneak them in the side entrance thru the internet cafe.
women can be found all over the city, but you must put in a little effort. after 7pm the park gets a decent selection of young ladies. be careful as some appear to be ****. i ask their age , then i ask for the year they were born. it is funny to see the response.some use sister's, mother's, etc cedula. the going price in the park appears to be 100-300 cordobas. presently there are 15.75 cordobas to a $us.
other action spots are: zoom bar,flamingo bar,el club,and disco cesar. the first three are located within 1-3 blocks of the park. the disco is located across from the lake, along with an entire street of bars and restaurants. prices go up in these upscale locations to 300-500 cordobas.
in all, i found the best selection at the disco on fri/sat nights after 8pm.cover charge of 10 cordobas,beer was 12 cordobas.
granada is a good place to go relax for a few days. it's a safe city,good food,prices are cheap.everything closed early, bars close at midnight during the week. most restaurants close at 9-10pm. if you keep in mind that this is not a world class destination, you will have a good time!
editor's note: posting of this report was delayed pending revisions to [u]add a space after commas and after periods. to avoid delays in future reports, please include one blank space after commas and one blank space after the period at the end of sentences. thanks!
Master Monger
09-19-04, 15:20
Dear Fellow Mongers,
Unless your into sightseeing for about a day and thats it, don't waste your time in Granada. It is true there are girls there but an hour more down the road and you are in Managua where they are better, cheaper and there is a lot more. SKIP GRANADA!!!
Master Monger
Trip to Grenada
Thought I'd get out of San Jose for a while, not for visa reasons, just to explore.
Took the TicaBus, C4200 = $9.50 ? Leaves early morning and at 12"30 pm. Comfortable seats that recline. 2 movies. Very, limited snacks and drinks = bring your own, including water. Long ride.
Supposed to arrive at 8"00 pm, but more like 9'00. I paid $1 for a taxi to Hotel Granda. Don't plan on walking.
So far the town is boring. Signed up for 4 days of Spanish lessons. Finished 2 days, then met Celia. Things might be looking up.
Tomorrow, she's going to meet me after class. Why does that sound so right?
The rest of the trip:
The Spanish school was good. They advertize 5 days, 4 hours per day for $95. I arranged 4 days, 5 hours. They seemed very flexible and even work Sundays.
Unlike other 1 on 1 schools I've attended, this one had a twist. There was a different teacher every hour or 2. It provided me with different accents, personalities, teaching styles, etc. I liked all 4 teachers and would reccommend the school.
Celia stopped by after school, we had a few drinks and a session. I guess I overpaid both nites. I had read on one of the boards that $25 or $30 was standard. I offered her 400 Cordobas = $24, she worked me up to 500C = $30. Great session, BBBJ, tight (no ninos), fun enough.
Then we tried to go to dinner. I suggested Centro Turistico, a complex of discos and restaurants, but they were all empty and boring at 8:00 pm on Friday. She was becoming difficult to talk to (my Spanish is pretty good, but not if she doesn't want to cooperate). I had planned dinner, dancing, and another session. But I sensed that I'd have a better time withour her. I gave her 600C = $36 for her time (about 2 hours), and bailed.
The next day, a Canadian told me he could introduce me to girls for 100C = $6. Didn't believe him, but I did meet him that nite. We went out, had a good time, but never found a $6 chica. Centro Turistico was hopping on Saturday, and I think the potential was there.
Overall, Grenada is a quiet, interesting place for a day or two, more if you want to study Spanish. I think there is inexpensive chica potential if you have the right contacts. Food and lodging are less than Costa Rica.
Also, cheap injternational phone calls and internet in many places.
MMMMMM
sounds like indeed Grenada is one to SKIP regarding the Hooker scene...!
Too bad the girl hadn't intrest in you Dboy.
But you are right....you'd better off alone then with such a woman...:-(
I know what you been through....had similar experiences in Peru. Paid expensive (60 bucks!) dinner...did a lot of "sucking up"...and in the end she wanted to go home...alone...OO well just fine with me; the street hookers still were up!:-)
I think that is what you guys call "a meal ticket"..??
And...if you are alone you could attract other chicas!
Cheer up!!! There are Lots more fish in the sea Dboy!
Johan
My wife and I found some good action in Grenada. We asked the hotel if they knew of a masseus. They called one to come to our room. We each got massages for and hour and then the three of us had sex for another hour for $50 with a quite attractive and quite sexy 24 year old.
Maybe we were just lucky.
Key Largo
Grand Pollo
04-24-05, 02:25
My wife and I found some good action in Grenada. We asked the hotel if they knew of a masseus. They called one to come to our room. We each got massages for and hour and then the three of us had sex for another hour for $50 with a quite attractive and quite sexy 24 year old.
Maybe we were just lucky.
Key Largo
Since the rate in Managua is C$250 or so ($18) and considering you got actual massages and 3-way assuming your wife and the girl were involved , is probably on the high but not unlikely end of the scale and in a town with limited resources not bad.
Perry Mason #1
05-30-05, 21:54
I agree with the earlier posts that Granada should be scratched from your itenerary if you goal is closing deals with attractive local women, either free or P4P.
It is one of the destinations heavily promoted by International Living as the greatest new opportunity in Central America. They talk of the great history, the amazing colonial buildings, and of course all the great real estate bargains. They of course have a small office in the city too where they will gladly help you spent your $250,000 on some great ol' fixer-upper.
What this means is that the city has a large percentage of Americans who have decided to temporary relocate there. Their presence creates inflated prices but unfortunately not much of a P4P market.
PM
Nibu Raphael
06-01-05, 22:57
Damn I thought Leon there would be some XXX Action too but so far I guess not. It is also the other bigger city in Nicaragua besides Granada. OK This is What I know so Far on Leon>>>The streets of Leon populaion 130,000 blend colonial with moden at every step. Horse drawn carriages and liberal students fill the streets,while bells from the 19 churches compete with taxi horns and camionetas. Prayer is never far from town parties where spiritually is easily forgetten. Despite the contstant mixing of eras,echoes of the towns Spanish founders ring out loud and clear. leon Viejo was founded on the shore of Lake Xolotlan in 1524. Destroyed by an earthquake in 1610,Leon was rebuilt 30 KM. to the west. Once a poor center,the new Leon soon become a cultural and intellectual sronghold,and the capital of Nicarauga for more then 300 years. The heady atmosphere fuled the imiganation of its favorite son,ruben Diaro ,whose poetry has launched the modernist movement in Latin America. As Bumber stickers on many cars proclaim,Leon is Orgullosamante Liberal AKA>> Proudly Liberal. THE UNAN,The Countrys first university sharpens Leons politics to a keen radical edge. On My next post I will try to put more info on What goes on in Leon and maybe even some info on Bluefields. Why no XXX info here on Leon and Granada has less people 90,000 Who knows Why. I hope to uncover this soon,NIBU R.
Nibu Raphael
06-04-05, 20:17
Sex is for sale in Nicaragua and the worlds oldest profession is one facet of Nicaraguas economy that has more then tripled in recent years,especially among young girls in Managua,Granada,Corinto,and border/trucking towns like Somotillo. Puterias>>> Aka>>> *****houses barely disguised as beauty salons or massage parlors operate with virtual impunity,and every strip club in Managua has a bank of rooms behind the stage,some with an actual cashier stationed at the door. Then there are the Street Girls and TVS on Carretera Masaya and around the Plaza Inter,and the numerous auto hotels,with rooms for rent by the hour. The situation is nowhere near as developed as the sex tourism industries of places like cuba,but it is undeniable that foreigners have contributed a in no small way to Nicaraguas sex economy. So that is What I know now about this one question Somoto near The Honduras border the same city as Somotillo? Can a Veteran Monger of Nicaragua explain that to me. What Sex Action in Rivas and San Juan Del Sur? I heard Rumours that Chinandega might have some Good XXX Action too. What about Masaya have way beteen Managua and Granada? Ok Then I hope someone follows up on this and posts back here. Later,Nibu R.
Grand Pollo
06-06-05, 03:04
Nibu - if you copy what you post as you did you should give credit to the book you copied it from.
Everything from "Sex is for sale in Nicaragua ...."to ".....a in no small way to Nicaraguas sex economy."
Is taken from Moon's Guide which I suspect will not impress the publishers of their book, considering they are far more the NGO types than the monger types.
Nibu,
Please do not take my comments herein to be a "flame" in any way shape or form. I greatly appreciate your comments and "travel logs" in many other countries throughout LatAm, however, I must take exception to some of your comments from your most recent post on prostitution in Nicaragua. I use to live in Managua and still frequent the country every few months, plus, I use to live with a dancer so I got to know the club girls and the club culture quite intimately.
"one facet of Nicaraguas economy that has more then tripled in recent years, especially among young girls in Managua, Granada, Corinto, and border / trucking towns like Somotillo"
There is only minimal P4P in Granada; Corinto has virtually nothing (there are no strip clubs and I don't know where any small casas de citas are in Corinto); Somotillo is just a tough working town.
"it is undeniable that foreigners have contributed a in no small way to Nicaragua's sex economy."
I would take exception to this comment. Look how infrequently there are posts in the WSG on Nicaragua. There are only a couple of people whom ever go to Nicaragua looking just for the alleged sex industry. Sure, there are a few strip clubs in Managua, but virtually no Gringos or foreign tourists. The high-end clubs (Hollywood, Vale Todo, ?) will occasionally have a Gringo or two, a couple of Japanese, and maybe a Chinese guy. The rest of the low-end clubs (Polancos, Casa Grande, the former Pigales) are generally Nicaraguan, as are all the casa de citas. I have never seen a tourist in a Managua casa de cita. I really would not consider this much of a sexual tourism industry!
"is Somoto near The Honduras border the same city as Somotillo?"
Nope, Somotillo is a tiny little dumpy border town, only about 5 km from the Honduran border. Somoto is a little bit larger city maybe another 50 km in-land. There is no action in either of these locales, unless maybe you are a truck driver!
"What Sex Action in Rivas and San Juan Del Sur?"
To my knowledge there ain't zip in Rivas. Sure, you can always find a dumpy little bar somewhere that a couple of girls are working the room. But I guarantee they will not be very attractive or "doable". There is always sex to be found in any little town in Nicaragua, but it usually isn't worth the effort. You would think there would be some action in San Juan del Sur because for Nicaragua it has tourism. There use to be a dumpy little strip club, but it closed down a couple of years ago. I would think you might find something in the tourist bars along the beach, but once again, it sure is not worth the trip to San Juan del Sur to go looking for pussy.
"I heard Rumours that Chinandega might have some Good XXX Action too."
I sure don't know where you heard this rumor! No way. I have spent a lot of time in Chinandega and Corinto over the past few years. I have cruised the streets, asked in bars, hustled guys on the street, all asking where is a strip club or a bar with girls. Not once, never, have I even had a bone thrown to me in Chinandega. I even have driven the 12 miles over to Corinto, virtually nothing. Only once have I ever got lucky and picked up a cute chic in a kind of beach bar in Corinto. We went back to her "hut" and shagged the nasty (only one block from the port). She was cute and a lot of fun, but she is the only girl I have ever even seen in Corinto or Chinandega!
"What about Masaya half way between Managua and Granada?"
I have never heard of anything in Masaya. Why wouldn't you just want to stay in Managua or drive the extra 20 minutes to Granada? I am sure there are a couple of crappy little bars in Masaya, with a skanky girl or two, but why?
Sorry, Nibu, I just cannot agree with your comments, but I still love you, man! Nicaragua is the most wonderful country in CenAm and the girls are incredibly fun and tremendous in bed. They will fuck you until you are gasping for air and your genitals fall off, and then want to start over again with you. I love Nicaragua and its women. I just don't feel the recent comments herein are accurate.
Grand Pollo
06-14-05, 03:12
Monaghan, the first 1/2 of the post was copied from a guidebook. From 2002 or earlier allowing for edits etc., probably research in 2001 and prior. I agree with you in the 12 or so casas I have seen there were two gringos and even they were Americans living in Nic working in some aquaculture operation. The lack of gringos keeps the prices low, e.g. to local standards.
Grand Pollo,
Are you sure those guys were Gringos? Or, maybe Canadians? There just are not too many Gringos stomping around the Promised Land!
Grand Pollo
06-15-05, 00:54
Grand Pollo,
Are you sure those guys were Gringos? Or, maybe Canadians? There just are not too many Gringos stomping around the Promised Land!
Yeah I was sure - they were drunken assholes who acted like they owned the place as a result, overpaid, couldn't get it up and wore shorts.
Vincent Vega
08-17-05, 08:06
Took a trip over the Costa Rican border last week into southern Nicarauga. While San Juan Del Sur has no action, it is a quiet little town with several bars and decent restaurants. A nice place to get away with a chica.
20 km north is Rivas. Arbolitas bar is 3 km north of the traffic circle on the main road. It has a decent selection for a Monday night. Ten girls ranging from 5's to 8's. $20 usd got you a room and a girl for one pop. Action was very mechanical and no GFE.
Some gringos I met at Arbolitos said that Flamingos, which is in the town of Rivas, has a better selection and better attitudes.
I am now in Leon, Nicaragua , approx. 2 hours by mini-bus from Managua .
It is a city with a lot of possibilities as the first things to hit you is the number of available university students as the campus and the lecture buildings are right downtown mostly around Avenida Central.
Bohemio bar on one of the side streets had a lot of girls , workers and students, for a Wednesday evening until 2 a.m. It costs 20 Cordobas ( 16.8 cordobas for a dollar) to get in and the beer sells for 13 cordobas( less than a dollar) . I did not approach 3 chicas all by themselves and the rest were couples .
I met a girl in the street on Avenida Central as I was asking for a good disco to go to; she offered to be my gracious guide and she took me by taxi( 15-20 cordobas) to accordingly the best disco in town called Delictu. After about a 5 to 10 minute drive we reached that place. On a Wednesday, it was packed. Entrance was 50 cordobas per person which entitles you to one free beer and a ticket for a draw . Plenty of chicas , many dancing by themselves , and in the 5s to the occasional 7s; as I was with that chica , I did not try to find out if they were semi-pros or regular students or office workers. Very few ( at the most 3 or 4 ) foreigners. It is worth some research , great potential for mongers.
Granada city, about 50 minutes to an hour drive from Managua on a Tuesday evening was disappointing ; very few ( 2 or 3 ) chicas , mostly SW as I was told by a security guard at a street corner and by taxi drivers. They asked for 20 dollars and were definitely 4s or 3s in my opinion; only bar worth a visit is Ël Club an expat joint .
Guys , the new mongering place is Leon in Nicaragua.
I was told by a taxi driver that they are 2 strip clubs but as I was feeling tired I did not take his offer .
Grand Pollo
08-20-05, 03:11
It seems premature with no actual experience of prices and one location to say the world's destination for mongers is Leon. It isn't and by the way it is hotter than hell and hotter than any other location in Nicaragua. Lots of history especially as to the civil war, one of the cities bombed by Somoza using cargo planes and bombs dropped without aiming all that well.
Granada is aimed at the tour bus type of tourists and while scenic is a pointless exercise. Ditto Masaya and the small towns of the Pueblas Blancas.
So apart from visitng the disco what happened in Leon chica- wise?
Kool Klyde
08-22-05, 04:48
Thinking of going with a friend to visit a cigar factory near Estelie (?sp?). Was wondering what the girls were like, ($$, avability, ect) vs stopping in Costa Ricka?
Thanks for any help.
kk
Grand Pollo, you certainly are raising the bar for me.
Well, I did go to a Strip Bar , I forgot to write down the name; but ask any taxi driver and you will be told there are two Stripper clubs in Leon.
The one I went to cost 20 cordobas by taxi to get there and the entrance fee was a mere 10 cordobas.
As soon as I stepped in , I was greeted by three strippers grinning and coming to my table asking me to pay them a beer; 20 cordobas for a beer for a chica , she will sit down with you and make conversation and let you touch her . For 270 cordobas , she will go in the back rooms with you for everything sexual . I did not take the offer but I went for a lapdance for 70 cordobas where I was allowed to touch her all over and she grinded herself all over me.
Chicas were in the 5 to 6 as to sexiness but all were friendly and good-natured.
The next day, I went to Matagalpa ; there are also two strip clubs and I went to one called Conejitas even though I was told it was the lesser of the two ; nine to 10 girls there and 2 or 3 were from the Atlantic coast.
I was told I could have a duo( 2 chicas together) in the back room for 600 cordobas and one for 300 cordobas.
I did buy a beer for myself for 20 cordobas and another at 40 cordobas by a chica who proceeded to kiss me right there at my table( french kissing ) and allowed to do anything with my hands including fingering her. It was a blast for these 40 cordobas. Long french kiss, grinding on my lap , fingering her. Finally, I could not bear it any longer and went in the back room for 300 cordobas for one hour where she did everything I wanted including BBBJ.
Guys, hit Matagalpa, you won't regret it.
I swear I could reduce these asking prices and some were willing to come at my hotel for a lesser price.
Matagalpa has a lot of young student girls and two discos : La Rosticeria and another.
Grand Pollo
08-25-05, 03:49
Thinking of going with a friend to visit a cigar factory near Estelie (?sp?). Was wondering what the girls were like, ($$, avability, ect) vs stopping in Costa Ricka?
Thanks for any help.
kk
Probably one bar of the type described under Leon. The smaller the town the less likely you wil find girls as they all operate in secret and many live at home. If you visit Don Kiki's cigar factory they expect you to buy some BTW but they are very good quality and quite reasonable in price. The other is closed to visitors as it is a tax free export only place. Go about 5 miles north of the Esteli town proper and you find the ciagr factory.
I have been in Esteli twice and found no bars or casas.
Grand Pollo
08-25-05, 03:52
Grand Pollo, you certainly are raising the bar for me.
The next day, I went to Matagalpa ; there are also two strip clubs and I went to one called Conejitas even though I was told it was the lesser of the two ; nine to 10 girls there and 2 or 3 were from the Atlantic coast.
I was told I could have a duo( 2 chicas together) in the back room for 600 cordobas and one for 300 cordobas.
I did buy a beer for myself for 20 cordobas and another at 40 cordobas by a chica who proceeded to kiss me right there at my table( french kissing ) and allowed to do anything with my hands including fingering her. It was a blast for these 40 cordobas. Long french kiss, grinding on my lap , fingering her. Finally, I could not bear it any longer and went in the back room for 300 cordobas for one hour where she did everything I wanted including BBBJ.
Guys, hit Matagalpa, you won't regret it.
I swear I could reduce these asking prices and some were willing to come at my hotel for a lesser price.
Matagalpa has a lot of young student girls and two discos : La Rosticeria and another.
Just a point to other guys, Matagalpa is quite a distance from Managua 3 hours at least not a $5 cab ride type of deal. My driver is from there and we are going in October to see the coffee harvests, so I will check these joints out unless one of the two GF's is with me, then I can't.
If C$300 is the max in Managua for an hour it should be less in the towns with less money like Matagalpa. Please , please negotiate price.
Grand Pollo, you are right in saying to negotiate down the prices asked!
Some correction though : there is an express bus ( school bus type) that leaves Managua at the what they call Mayore bus terminal; it leaves at 12:30 p.m.every day and gets to Matagalpa in 2 hours only . I took it on a Wednesday and they were about 10 people in all for a bus that could accomodate 30 people, so lots of room .
As I said before , there are 2 strip joints : Conejitas and the other is called Las Munecas. I personally prefer Conejitas as they seem to have more girls than Munecas ( only 5 , 2 chicas really attractive).
Taxi ride from towncentre is about 30 cordobas and the entrance is 10 cordobas. All the girls want a beer at 40 cordobas as they get a share of it but for yourself you can get a Victoria beer for 20 cordobas. For that 40 cordobas beer, you are allowed to dance very close to her , touching almost everywhere of her body, french kissing, tits kissing, navel kissing , almost everything. Sweet girls and good-natured. Avoid paying too many beers even though for 40 cordobas at 16.8 cordobas a dollar you won´t be ruined.
Hotels in town charge anywhere from 100 to 200 cordobas per night for a reasonable room ( private bathroom , fan, double bed , clean ) but do not expect the Holiday Inn standard. All chica friendly. Just hit any hotel on the main street : Hotel Apante opposite the park, Hotel Soza, Hotel Central.
Good security, polite people.
Grand Pollo
08-27-05, 02:55
Grand Pollo, you are right in saying to negotiate down the prices asked!
Some correction though : there is an express bus ( school bus type) that leaves Managua at the what they call Mayore bus terminal; it leaves at 12:30 p.m.every day and gets to Matagalpa in 2 hours only . I took it on a Wednesday and they were about 10 people in all for a bus that could accomodate 30 people, so lots of room .
As I said before , there are 2 strip joints : Conejitas and the other is called Las Munecas. I personally prefer Conejitas as they seem to have more girls than Munecas ( only 5 , 2 chicas really attractive).
Taxi ride from towncentre is about 30 cordobas and the entrance is 10 cordobas. All the girls want a beer at 40 cordobas as they get a share of it but for yourself you can get a Victoria beer for 20 cordobas. For that 40 cordobas beer, you are allowed to dance very close to her , touching almost everywhere of her body, french kissing, tits kissing, navel kissing , almost everything. Sweet girls and good-natured. Avoid paying too many beers even though for 40 cordobas at 16.8 cordobas a dollar you won´t be ruined.
Good security, polite people.
Well I have a car and driver so buses are out. I don't have the patience for expresos or any buses for that matter, regardless of how cheap - but if we are in Matagalpa since my driver is from there we'll check out these joints.
You didn't say other than buying beer and dancing what and where and how much to do something more interesting than that. I am not paying 400 cords in an evening to buy beer when you can get laid twice in Managua for that.
Do they have rooms on premises, can you go off premises, if so how much is a salida, how much for the girls, all night or there and back etc.
I am sorry! I assumed you guys knew the deal but here it is :
On premises : girls ask 300 cordobas to go in the back rooms and do anything you want for one hour or so.
Off premises : if it is before midnight it takes 600 cordobas to take the girl out.
I did not haggle over prices nor took the offer for off premises; I tried the On premises and was quite satisfied with the girl I picked; I was not rushed and she was accomodating at all times. But the room itself is not the Holiday Inn room type.
Grand Pollo
08-28-05, 01:09
I am sorry! I assumed you guys knew the deal but here it is :
On premises : girls ask 300 cordobas to go in the back rooms and do anything you want for one hour or so.
Off premises : if it is before midnight it takes 600 cordobas to take the girl out.
I did not haggle over prices nor took the offer for off premises; I tried the On premises and was quite satisfied with the girl I picked; I was not rushed and she was accomodating at all times. But the room itself is not the Holiday Inn room type.
Unless it is based on a lack of girls, these prices are as much as 50% higher than Managua, though $17.85 vs. $11.50 is hair splitting, I suspect locals pay a lot less. C$300 is a lot for a local.
The C$600 before midnight is a salida for the house and you pay the girl or is that it? Unless you do not mean all night then it is ridiculous for an hour.
I suspect the rooms are pretty grungy.
Well, I did not check out if the 600 cordobas was for an hour; I doubt so as the chicas seem really happy to be able to get out. The deal as I understood it from the chicas are that they are not allowed even during the day when they are not "working" to leave the club, so they sleep in the premises and cook and relax there during the day as if in a " luxury" jail.
But Monday and Tuesday, the club is closed and they are allowed to get out and that is when you can squire them around and do private deals with them.
Most of the men who venture in the place seem to be campesinos or the local farmers and cow-boys who come in with their straw hats on and wave their 50 or 100 cordobas bills to attract the chicas on the premises.
The chicas : a few 6s and 7s( 2 or 3) , most of them , in my opinion are 5s but all are good-natured, polite, affectuous.
All in all, the scene is much better in Managua for choice and price and variety.
Vincent Vega
12-09-05, 09:26
I am heading to the Corn Islands in Jan. for some scuba diving. Is there any action to be had on the islands?
The only action we got was a machete across our thoats while being robbed less than 50 metres from the picnic centre resort. This was on big corn (if I was you I would get a taxi from the airport to the dock and get to little corn a.s.a.p) where there is no action but good diving school and chill out time. On the two occassions I have been to big corn I have felt uncomfortable on several occassions, this is compounded by the local police not interested in responding to our problems (in fact the copper who attended the assault at the picnic centre was last seen with our waitress on the back of his motorbike heading along the beach! This is not a isolated incident. Be warned. I have travelled over all of nica during the last 5 years and this island is totally not representitive of nica.
Grand Pollo
12-10-05, 03:13
I am heading to the Corn Islands in Jan. for some scuba diving. Is there any action to be had on the islands?
There certainly is in Bluefields. Corn island would be doubtful but every bar has a chance. I doubt there would be massage parlors.
Monkeyballs
12-19-05, 08:41
I must be the only person who ever found action in Little Corn (at least from all I've read). I was there about a year ago. There is a house almost directly across from the only sidewalk cafe (is near where the ferry departs). The couple that own the cafe also own a nearby general store and are nice people--about the only ones that were that I met. The place I am referring to also rents rooms and usually has some black dudes sitting on the front porch, so you can ask one of them--get yourself a place to rest your head and some pussy to boot. Be careful though, as the chicas are extremely streetwise; so keep checking your wallet. In my case, I got a young black chica (I'd rate 7-8). She stayed with me for a week but was a true *****, and I made up an excuse to get the hell away her (I broke a sacred mongering rule: never stay with one for more than 3 days). I can still feel pain where my balls were squeezed, but it only cost me $100 total. Good luck in Little Corn. Unfortunately, the place didn't leave a warm spot in my heart. I especially detested the lackey who managed the dive shop and the moron owner of the Iguana.
I am now in Leon until late in January 2006 and would certainly appreciate information on LEON chicas.
There is the Venus club where you can watch dancing girls provided you pay 10 cordobas to get in ( at the gate ) plus 20 cordobas for a beer. Do not pay beer to a girl unless you want to be with her for dancing together and some mouth kissing and body contact.
To go to the back room , generally you pay 270 cordobas ( 17 cordobas to a dollar) or 16 dollars for one hour sex action . I did not try it but the girls vary from a 4 to a 7.
To take her out 700 cordobas ( about 40 dollars ) for the rest of the night in your hotel room until 5 p.m.
The other club is called Vicky and I am told carries fewer girls ( 4-5 compared to 10 at Venus ) but there is no entrance fee at Vicky and also told the fee is less.
You can also find SWs on the Highway to Chinandega , the same strip of highway where the 2 clubs are located and variously called the By-Pass by the taxi drivers in Leon. the difficulty is to locate them on the highway and only educated Leon taxi drivers eyes can do an excellent job ; for that, they will usually charge you 50 cordobas ( about 3 dollars ) and they will take you and the girl to a place called La Colmita or La Colma to bed the girls if you cannot take them to your hotel or guesthouse. Negotiate first with the taxi driver to be safe rather than sorry.
The SWs charge between 100 to 200 cordobas for an hour or two and rate a 4 or 5.
To correct the above info regarding Vicky Club, yes, you do pay an entrance fee of 10 cordobas. ADVANTAGE : you can take out a girl FOR TWO HOURS at the price of 300 cordobas( 18 dollars) and that is all if you have your own room to take her. Of course, once paid you may be in for a surprise as to performance.
Only 2 girls worth a 5 to 6 in attraction.
Well this board sure is quiet !
Just got back from a week in san Juan, but was accompanied, so unable to check out the scene.
I did see a couple if guys having drinks and eating dinner with what seemed to be a couple of WGs, but does someone know what the situation is like there? Where do these girls hang out, pricing etc ? A local gringo did mention that a pair of Victoria's Secret underwear is very much appreciated ?
Going back in a few weeks.........alone.
Thank in advance.
Grand Pollo
04-12-06, 22:32
I have not heard of any girls readily available in SJDS (especially now with all the Managua families there) but I would not be surprised if they came from Managua on an overnight thing. They'd go for that big time and I have taken a few to Pochomil and Poneloya.
GP, so do you thing maybe the guys with their "dates" pulled into town, having brought them from MGA ?
thanks.
Was hoping at least there might have been a bar or two. Maybe Ricardo's?
Of course, if not many mongers end up in SJDS, the quality might be, well......you know. :(
Grand Pollo
04-15-06, 16:59
They bring dates to SJDS all the time. This week of course not as it is Semana Santa and the family of the girl or relatives might be there. As a rule the smaller the community the less you find girls, a handful in Leon, a few in Matagalpa, but they risk being found out in a small town - also apart from 2 times a year SJDS is not really all that busy to support it.
I think it would be a poor choioce to be stationed in SJDS until after you hooked up with someone in Managua to go with you - and those with kids etc., it is not all that easy. I am flying out this a.m. after a week with one girl, 6 p.m. to 8 a.m. except the last day she stayed from Thursday p.m. to this morning (Saturday). She has a girl that I paid for the time to be with the kids, C$100 per 12 hours.
And no her name and location is not for sharing or publication.
FastFishRacer
05-30-06, 13:05
I met a girl in Managua who was willing to spend a weekend with me in sjds for $100.00 plus bikini and bus fare home.
Problem was my wife was coming in the following week so I had to back off the deal.
She was sweet, well worth the one night in managua.
Maybe next time
Grand Pollo
05-31-06, 04:42
For $100 plus clothes I am surprised you didn't find about 300 girls since that is about double what you'd need to pay.
I wonder what a decent bikini costs? Never had to buy one for a Nica gal, but I've bought lots of other ladies clothes, jean skirts, shorts, around C$120 in Mercado Oriental. Bought two pairs of good new jeans there once for a girl for a whopping US$9, and there was a 3rd pair in the bag, much too large for her but I gave them to the girl at the hotel.
If you can be cautious enough Mercado Oriental is easily 20% lower than Huembes.
Note a better spend of US$100 is to take the girl to Montelimar for one night and not pay her anything other than maybe C$500-600 or so when she goes home.
I've heard a lot about it, but found little to read. Any of you guys want to give me a mini report? Thanks!
Grand Pollo
06-14-06, 02:11
Someone posted something here a while ago - Vic Nate I think. Dick all there just like Masaya. Tourists up the ass unfortunately and a small town where locals would be found out in a day. Boring as hell even as a visitor by the way.
Thanks , Gran Pollo, but no Granada is not one of my preferences in Nicaragua.
It is close to Managua and can be travelled easily in less than one hour from Managua.
I have met many Europeans who have retired there and invested their retirement money in a guesthouse or similar facility; some Americans are also there for the same reasons. They are all nice people but tend to be on the conservative side, very proper.
My sense, and I may be wrong, is they are trying to create a little paradise and a good investment place by working with the local mayor to attract tourists looking for a colonial history with colonial buildings well restored , upper middle class restaurants with corresponding prices, nice watering holes for the well-moneyed tourists,.... nothing wrong with that unless you want to see the real Nicaragua, not some postal card fake.
As to SWs , they are rare and those I saw were either on the fat side or not physically attractive and few and demanding prices that are double what you would pay in Managua.
If you want to play the tourist with wife and family in tow and you want to pay above average prices ( like 50 to 75 dollars for a hotel room for one person, restaurant bills in the vicinity of 15-20 dollars for lunch) well by all means , go to Granada.
But , don t ge me wrong ; it is a place to see for colonial architecture , for friendly people, for good food but certainly not for mongering.
Grand Pollo
07-18-06, 02:46
I don't disagree. TWOT(*)
Total waste of time.
FastFishRacer
07-25-06, 14:27
When you take in the main road past the Texaco station go straight till you run into El Timon restraunt. Turn right got to the ned of the street and turn left and you will find a couple of outdoor patio type bars there on the left.
The girls are usually hangining around. I enjoyed time with the bar tender $20.00. Dimmly lit room in the back of the bar. She was a 7. there were a couple more I could have picked from but it was my first time there.
I know I paid too much but it was a tourist thing. Next time I will offer $10.
Well San Juan Del Sur is up and running it was a mellow scene.
FFR
Poneloya and las Penitas are about 30 minutes by bus from the Subtiava market in Leon.
Take a taxi to Subtiava market for about 10 cordobas from Leon. From there , take the Poneloya bus for 9 cordobas and be prepared to face a crowded bus but it is so cheap.
There are good hotels ( TV, air fan, swimming pool, bar restaurant) on the seaside for 20 bucks at Suyapa Hotel; it is the best hotel there . but , you can also go to Barco de Oro or the Oasis for about 12 to 15 dollars for a room with fan, double bed , private bath.
to monger, it is a small town. It is best to bring your own girl from Leon or Managua.
the waves are so high on the coast it is difficult to really swim though you can rent a surfboard for 5 dollars a half day.
Not much to do there , it is pretty quiet . Not one bank or bank machine and some hotels ( Oasis) do not take credit cards. To be safe, bring cash for 50 dollars for the day .
Grand Pollo
09-12-06, 00:25
It is a really nice place to take a girl for lunch and a swim. I tried to get a day rate for our stuff in May and no dice but the overnight rate was only $12 so I signed in as Bill Clinton and we used the room anyway. Three tiny little beds, no TV and a good bathroom. I guess it was more family oriented as the beds were like 2 feet wide and 5 feet long.
The food is good - lots of people from Leon come for lunch and meetings, but it is worth going to Poneloya if you are in Leon already.
I'll be in El Castillo and that area for tarpin fishing in January. Is there anything in the local hotels or clubs. I have read the forum. I couldnt find any info on the smaller areas.
I'll be in El Castillo and that area for tarpin fishing in January. Is there anything in the local hotels or clubs. I have read the forum. I couldnt find any info on the smaller areas.If there is, What would the going rate be.
You are going Tarpin fishing in El Castillo? That is such a small town I doubt it has any hotels whatsoever. Its only access is by boat. Do tarpins live in rivers? El Castillo is on the Rio San Juan ... not the ocean.
Your best bet is Managua on the night before you head down to El Castillo
You are going Tarpin fishing in El Castillo? That is such a small town I doubt it has any hotels whatsoever. Its only access is by boat. Do tarpins live in rivers? El Castillo is on the Rio San Juan ... not the ocean.
Your best bet is Managua on the night before you head down to El Castillo
Sorry for the late reply. Yes Tarpin are in the rivers and lakes.
I'll be in Solentiname and El Castillo. I have never been so I have no referance to any night life. I'll have 2 days before in San Jose CR and then 6 days fishing on the river and lake Nicaraqua.
Mountain Guy
04-06-07, 18:44
All the locals were pouring out of Managua yesterday for the holidays, so Luis offered to drive me to Grenada for gas money since he wouldn´t have much work. The town is full and the dirty beach of Lake Nicaragua is packed with local people. There are hundreds of cute chicas, but they swim with all their clothes on!!! Must be the Catholic upbringing. The discos along Tourista Centro are busy with mostly young couples.
My hotel El Club has a disco that was packed with Nica chicas, many really hot. Rooms are $35.
I saw a few big girls along the street with heavy makeup and heels that looked like they were working. This is a great place for photos, and if you are young and fluent in Spanish you might score with one of the locals, but mongering is not available as far as I can see. Almost all the tourists are from Europe.
I am looking forward to more play time in Managua.
Mountain Guy
04-12-07, 14:02
When you take in the main road past the Texaco station go straight till you run into El Timon restraunt. Turn right got to the ned of the street and turn left and you will find a couple of outdoor patio type bars there on the left.
The girls are usually hangining around. I enjoyed time with the bar tender $20.00. Dimmly lit room in the back of the bar. She was a 7. there were a couple more I could have picked from but it was my first time there.
I know I paid too much but it was a tourist thing. Next time I will offer $10.
Well San Juan Del Sur is up and running it was a mellow scene.
FFR
I tried this area twice and didn't see any working chicas. Some local gringos told me there are two chica casas. One is--following your directions, but turn right at the end of the street where the outdoor beach bars are. Go two blocks and listen for the music on the left. About five chicas, $10 for 30 minutes.
The other place is over the river in not too nice a barrio. They said the chica number varies and cost is 150c.
Mountain Guy
04-12-07, 14:14
Bank: There is a bank right off the road that goes by the beach.
ATM's: There is an ATM at this bank and another one in the lobby of Hotel Casablanca, facing El Timon restaurante on Paseo Maritimo.
Credit Cards: Most of the hotels take credit cards. Several of the nicer restaurants on the beach also had credit card decals up.
As noted, this is not a mongering destination, but it is a beautiful place to relax or bring your own chica to. I was bummed at all the trash on the beach. There are several new developments proposed, including a huge beachfront high rise hotel. One local told me it will be good for the town, but it is going to become the Cancun of Nicaragua.
Grand Pollo
04-13-07, 00:22
If you have a chica for more than a night and it is not Easter week or Xmas, one night at Montelimar (located at Pochomil an hour west of Managua) for US$140 all inclusive is an unforgettable treat that you will get miles of benefit from. Local travel agents like Munditur can set it up for you.
Has anyone here been to Leon? I am making a trip there and want to know what the scene is like. I also heard that regular women are easy to meet in this town. Is this true? Thanks
Grand Pollo
05-08-07, 02:21
Lots of times. Never seen one working girl at all there. Others may have had some luck, as I wasn't really looking. One thing is that it is hotter than hell there, typically 10 degrees hotter than Managua on any given day. Last Easter it was 45.
Travelled to Granada last weekend. Some SW action in the central park, several younger girls, probably late teens, started at $100 and went down to $30 for 1 hour, later that night I was offered 2 girls, 2 hours for $100
I'm new here to ISG, but lived in Nicaragua for 5 years. I have tried most of the MP's in Managua and have had good and VERY bad experiences.
First of all if you are mew to Nicaragua buy a Nuevo Diario newspaper and look in the Classifieds under "Belleza". There is a whole list there from Bellamarys to Masajes Gloria to Fenix. My advice for the most enjoyable relaxing experience is to go early, before noon. There are almost never other clients and the girls more relaxed and more girls to choose from. Now here is something that is my opinion: If you are gentle, caring, tender and will go downtown she will generally be more generous in her ministrations to you and you will LOVE IT!!
After your 1 or 2 hour time with her, if you find one you like invite her discreetly to Dinner.
Dress nicely, not like a surfer gringo and take her somewhere like you would any date, (e.g. La Plancha, TGIF, Rincon Espanol, Ruta Maya). I cannot tell you the number of times that we enjoyed a conversation, and went back to my hotel w/o ever talking money. I of course tipped always and never got a complaint.
The girls on Carretera Masaya are generally petulant users. I have had the RARE enjoyable experience but tend to avoid them now.
SJDS is generally barren territory unless you plan on living there for at least a few months. The girls who move from expat to expat are called chupadoras cuz they suck you dry of money and patience. ADVICE: guard your wallets and DO NOT let them move in with you and beware the sick relative. (grin)There are some rare one-nighters (I have witnessed various due to my former job) but again I say rare. The putero (brothel) Next to the disco is sleazy and the drunk gringo finds himself robbed on the 1/2 mile walk back to the main part of town.
Anyway let me know if you have any questions.
EDITOR'S NOTE: I certainly hope that the author or somebody else will post a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please Click Here (http://www.internationalsexguide.info/forum/announcement-reportsofdistinction.php?) for more information.
Just want to add my experience at San Juan del Sur. I followed the directions of previous poster FastfishRacer and managed to find the bars he was referring to.
For anyone who is having problems finding these 2 bars: walk north along the beach road (the beach will be on your left) quite a long way, about 500 metres or so from the El Timon Restaurant. This road is a bit deserted at night. At the end of the road you turn right (not left as indicated by FastFishRacer). The bars are about 50 metres up on the left.
There are a few decrepit bars playing music and a guy sitting on a chair outside the bar who wont solicit you over. There are a few girls hanging around.
Last night I found a reasonably nice chica called Naomi, 25yrs from Managua. Tall and pretty sexy. A 7. She quoted me $50usd all night, or $20 for a quickie on site. I offered $10 for on site and she accepted straight away.
There is a bit of a shower area to wash your cock if need be but bring your own soap. And bring your own lube.
Definitely a low end experience but pretty good for the price.
Grand Pollo
11-09-07, 05:09
I'm new here to ISG, but lived in Nicaragua for 5 years. I have tried most of the MP's in Managua and have had good and VERY bad experiences.
First of all if you are mew to Nicaragua buy a Nuevo Diario newspaper and look in the Classifieds under "Belleza". There is a whole list there from Bellamarys to Masajes Gloria to Fenix.
Since the problem in August with VIP Peppers there are no classifieds in El Nuevo Diario under bellaza except for one or two actual beauty parlors.
I am amazed that someone living there does not know this. You can save the 5 pesos and read it online at elnuevodiario.com.ni and see the lack of ads there as well.
Yeah I was sure - they were drunken assholes who acted like they owned the place as a result, overpaid, couldn't get it up and wore shorts.What is wrong with shorts?
Most places I have been any North American and caucasian Europeans and Australians would be considered "Gringos"
Fillychaser
11-21-07, 23:45
There are two chica strip clubs in Masaya. The first one is located on the road from Masaya to Caterina and is called Blue Foxies. It is a sad excuse for a strip joint, with the only redeeming quality being that the strip pole is an integral part of the structure, and actually does carry some of the roof load.
The chicas were 6's to 8's, and beers ranged from 20 to 25 cords. The chicas' beers were 53. I think the room and chica together were either 600 or 500 cords, roughly US$25.
The second club, on which I made a report in the Managua thread is called Dina's Night Club, aka Sopas Dina's No. 2, and is directly across the entrance to the Masaya Volcano entrance.
Since the problem in August with VIP Peppers there are no classifieds in El Nuevo Diario under bellaza except for one or two actual beauty parlors.
I am amazed that someone living there does not know this. You can save the 5 pesos and read it online at elnuevodiario.com.ni and see the lack of ads there as well.I said LIVED, past tense. didn't know about Nuevo Diario. Jee, .get a grip
don't pick on grand pollo. it seems that ever since i started posting about the "real nicaragua," grand pollo has lost his voice. i hope this is not the case and he's just busy handling business in the usa.
actually, classifieds are no longer available on elnuevodiario.com.ni grand pollo. they use to several months ago, but as of two months they no longer exist.
nicafan, all new posters to this board have encountered grand pollo as the gatekeeper of wisdom. as of late we "newbies" have confirep001ed his keys. lol.
since the problem in august with vip peppers there are no classifieds in el nuevo diario under bellaza except for one or two actual beauty parlors.
i am amazed that someone living there does not know this. you can save the 5 pesos and read it online at elnuevodiario.com.ni and see the lack of ads there as well.
i said lived, past tense. didn't know about nuevo diario. jee, .get a grip
look … grand pollo …… i really did not intend for you to go off waxing eloquently and expounding upon all of your insightful and not so sought after nicaraguan expertise. we all acknowledge that you are the lord high guru of everything there ever is to know about nicaragua. even though some of us have actually lived there for years as ex-pats as well traveling there three times in the past six weeks!
all that i am saying is that if one of you guys wants to meet a totally charming, beautiful, and one of the nicest most gorgeous nicaraguans i have ever met (she also speaks english for you non-spanish guys) …… i am just saying go by club hollywood and sit and have a couple of drinks and visit with ashanty. she is delightful. so, please, grand pollo … chill just a bit buddy!
I hear you. Thanks for the heads-up :-). Much appreciated. I too went to El ND last night and found it empty. Bummer. What happened at this VIP Peppers place?..any reports I missed?
Travel Fun
12-13-07, 19:11
I've been staying in Grenada the past week, and several times in the early evening I've been solicited by young women near the Central Park. So I don't know why others have had problems getting women here.
Last night I picked up two women (they are sisters. Teresa and Rosa) who asked for $20 for either. Both women are about 4 feet 5 in height, and okay in the proportions. I took Teresa up to the Auto Motel about 10 minutes from the Center. A 50 C taxi ride on the road to Managua. The hotel was 115 Cs for 2. 5 hours no AC, slightly more with AC. The women here don't like AC, so I went without it.
The rooms were clean, with a single sheet on the vinyl mattress. Nice big fan, that the chica didn't want running either, but it was sufficient for me to stay comfortable. The bathroom was big, with a nice shower and two clean towels included. Only cold water, but who needs hot water around here anyway?
The hotel only has Coca Cola or beer for purchase there, so if you want something else, you need to bring it. It was 20 Cs for the gaseosa or cerveza.
Teresa posed for my camera no problem, and gave a good account of herself for the hour and half I negotiated for 400 Cs. We caught a collectivo back to town for 30 Cs. So all told it was about 720 Cs for hotel, drinks, taxis both ways, and the hour and a half.
I'm planning to meet Rosa this evening to see how she measures up against her sister. I wanted them both at the same time, but they are a little shy about getting naked with each other, being sisters.
Teresa told me there are other women working the park, and I am going to try to pick up another on Saturday. If successful, I will post another report.
The street scene is pretty early here, so that might have been the problem for other members. Around 2030 there is hardly anyone left in the park. I picked up Teresa at 1900, and Rosa asked me to meet her around 1830 tonight. If you wnader around the park at sunset, you mihgt have better luck than later on.
EDITOR'S NOTE: I certainly hope that the author or somebody else will post a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please Click Here (http://www.internationalsexguide.info/forum/announcement-reportsofdistinction.php?) for more information.
Way to go "Travel Fun!"
Granada should have a SW scene with all that being the most dense area of Gringos and Europeanos. The hotel and hostels there too for the lodging.
The only problem might be that the community is so small, 40,000 residents, that word travels fast back to your family about being a SW.
Travel Fun
12-15-07, 20:54
Hey Meat Loaf. Yeah, it was 24 USD. But you may be right that this guy was not even connected with the management, because he was outside waiting with a car. I was kind of tired after walking all the way from Metro Center Mall to Eden, then down to Goodtimes and back to Fenix, so it was just too easy to turn around.
I was definitely too early for Goodtimes, but you never know what might turn up, so it was worth the try. My problem is that around 10 PM, I want to be in bed (asleep! ), so waiting until 11 PM is not going to happen. I leave that to the younger guys.
Your travel directions and tips for Managua were very much appreciated, and I found the clubs pretty much as you and the others have described them. My trip to Nicaragua is almost over, but I had a great time thanks to Members' research and reports.
Travel Fun
12-15-07, 21:08
I was able to hook up with Rosa, and she and Teresa both complained to me about all of their competition on the Grenada streets. I was solicited by a different group last night, but wanted to get some more from Rosa, so declined.
It turns out that the Autohotel has ice water in addition to beer and cokes, they were just out the first time I went out there.
From what I have seen, and from discussions with a couple of the expats living here in Grenada, the street scene closes down fairly early. If you don't have someone by about 9 or 10 PM, you will probably not get anyone off the street. It actually starts right at dusk, and there seem to be more than a few women crusing around the park and the streets nearby at that hour.
I noticed 3 working girls walking home around 9 PM last night when I was finishing up a light snack on the gringo restaurant row, and that was on Friday night. They were definitely not cruising any longer.
There is a disco scene down near the lake, but I never went there at night. I'm just not interested in the bar scene. So maybe that would be a better place to look later in the evenings.
The Central Park is practically deserted by 10 PM, and one guy told me one of his friends got robbed there by young guys a few weeks ago at midnight.
Grenada is so laid back that is hard to believe, but then four guys from Mangua came over and robbed the Western Union and shot a firefighter dead in the process this week. So you always have to pay attention.
Tonight is my last night here, if I get a different woman I will report back.
EDITOR'S NOTE: I certainly hope that the author or somebody else will post a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please Click Here (http://www.internationalsexguide.info/forum/announcement-reportsofdistinction.php?) for more information.
I decided to check out the scene at Club Venus in Leon the other week. It was a C$20 taxi ride from downtown Leon. The entrance painted on the wall is C$20, but expect to pay a gringo tax. A beer is C$20, and C$35 to buy one for the girls. I opted for a half bottle of rum for C$250. The girls are for the most part "gorditas" with only two or three in the 7-8 range, and only a few of them put any energy into their dancing. The other patrons didn't seem to mind, and were cheering and yelping campesino style for any exposed FUPA (that's fat upper pussy area).
I rejected the first couple of girls who approached me asking for me to buy a beer right away. I ended up chatting for most of the night with Ruby, in my opinion the hottest girl there. She has a tiny tight body and soft features, and a reasonably fresh personality. When it was her turn to dance I slipped her C$100 and that was enough for her to melt over me, grinding against my lap. She said that for C$300 ($15US) we could go in the back for an hour. I admit that I was on the prowl for a threesome (my first), so I didn't jump just yet.
The next dancer was Gabriela, Ruby's older sister. Similar body type (although five years and a child take its toll) and died dirty blond hair that I can only describe as being cuban style. I slipped her C$100 while she was dancing, and I had her all over me while her sister watched. She made the same offer to go in the back. By this time the strip club wouldn't have been open for another hour anyway (it closes at 2am I think) so I made a counter offer: C$300 each to come to my place. While they had each had threesomes before, they had never had one together. They considered it, and decided to go for it. I paid for the taxi back into town (another C$100 total for the three of us) and away we went.
They wanted to be paid up front, so I gave them each $20US - a nice tip up front, but I figured this was giong to be easily worth that and more. They wasted no time in getting themselves and me naked. They started by taking turns sucking me to attention. As this was my first time with two girls, there were certain things that I wanted - including eating out two pussies. I tossed Gabriela onto the edge of the bed and began my succulent meal of pink meat, while Ruby was kneeling and sucking on me, keeping things interesting. I am reasonably fluent in Spanish, but Gabriela let out things I ain't ever heard when she came. Then I tossed Ruby onto the bed and went to town snacking on her pussy. Now that was fun, and I can say that sisters do taste the same! :)
After that I had them suck on me again, giving them each a "huevo" to chew on. That was fuckin' hot! Finally Ruby rolled a condom on me, and she guided me into her sister so I could bang her from behind against the side of the bed. Then I switched to Ruby, nailing her missionary style on the bed while "ay papito" and "ay mi amor" kind of stuff flew from her hot little mouth.
Now, here I will admit that my - ahem - mantool - ahem - tarted wavering a bit - I don't know if it was just the stimulus overload of having two chicas, the condom being too tight (this is a problem here), or having drank half a bottle of rum at the strip club. "No problem" I told them "I just need some more oral attention." Off came the condom and Ruby began sucking me again like a trooper - that was all I needed :) - and Gabriela hopped on my face for some more pussy eating. Once fully hard again, Ruby put a new condom on, and rode me as hard as her tight little body would let her as she came. That was about all I could take - one sister riding my cock and the other riding my face - and I came hard.
Here is where things went sideways. All of a sudden their personalities went super cold as they quickly got dressed and practically ran out the door. I also saw that my money pocket/stash was not where I had left it (and I realized the reason they had wanted to be paid up front - so they could see where I would get the money from), and quickly discovered that they had taken the cash that was in there - approximately $100US. (I suspect that Gabriela took it while I was going at her sister). I tried to confront them about it, but that was fruitless as I wasn't about to try and manually search them - with me naked and them dressed, and who knows where they might have a knife. I at least got one last "chupadita" on the mein vein from Gabriela and a kiss on the lips from Ruby, and then they were gone...
Reflecting on things, it was foolish to have brought them to my place - there are enough cheap hourly hotels along the highway. However, for my first threesome, with stripper sisters, and the fact that the sex was as hot as I could have imagined, with plenty of oral to go around, I say that it was worth the final price including the $100 they took. However, knowing they robbed me, I can't rightfully go for either of them again. Take heed gentlemen - watch your shit like a hawk, especially when there are two of them.
EDITOR'S NOTE: I would suggest that the author or another Forum Member consider posting a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please Click Here (http://www.internationalsexguide.info/forum/announcement-reportsofdistinction.php?) for more information.
Hi Xtraj2,
I like to ask you if when you went to the Venus Club in León you could met a girl who's name is BARBARA.She is a beutiful tall girl ,with a great body who dances very well.She was the best table dancer in León (Vicky Club and Venus Club)some years ago , but I don't know if she still working there.
Anybody knows something about her?
Potro
Dear Friends,
I send attached some photographs showing BARBARA while dancing in the Vicky Bar of León a couple of years ago.
I guess another guys in this forum could know something about her.
Potro
Dear Friends,
I send attached some photographs showing BARBARA while dancing in the Vicky Bar of León a couple of years ago.
I guess another guys in this forum could know something about her.
PotroPotro,
You should post these photos in the photo gallery since it's so empty.
Nica Bound
03-19-08, 03:55
New to the forums but not to Nicaragua. Will be in Leon in April and have visited the two local dance clubs but wondering is thee is a bit more hidden in this cultural city. All those university students means got to be some ladies that need help paying their tuition expenses.
Can anybody recommend a location for masaje ?
I'm moving to the Rivas, Nicaragua area. Please give me all the info. you guys have on this place!
Thanks allot!
i'm moving to the rivas, nicaragua area. please give me all the info. you guys have on this place!
thanks allot!noting to really write about concerning rivas or san juan del sur. small beach community with nothing more than surf waves. costa rica would be a hell of a lot better of a place to relocate.
you will be bored out of this world in rivas or sjds. there's nothing to do as far as a well-rounded retirement. costa rica is already developed and has lots of things to do and experience.
the real estate situation is "shaky" in nicaragua since the sandanistas are back in power. the last time they were in power they stole (privatized) lots of foreign real estate assets. no title company has confidence in nicaragua and if they do the cost is extremely high.
usa mortage rates are 6% while nicargua mortgage rates are 15% and that assumes you get financing with the subprime market affecting global markets. costa rica has lots of owner-financed property!
nicaragua is "semi-communist / socialist" and is best-friends with hugo chavez, president of venezuela, who has confirep001ed the cement industry, oil industry, electricy industry, and devalued the bolivar currency tremendously within the country. power shortages and food shortages are common in venezuela. i mention venezuela because daniel ortega, president of nicaragua, is best-friends with chavez. they talk everyday and are always visiting one another. they are anti-usa / north american.
nicaragua is under the thumb of chavez and has bailed out nicaragua with a new power plant, oil refinery, and other infrastructure. so has iran.
basically, nicaragua is in bed with declared usa-enemies which is not good for confidence nor security. costa rica is protected by the usa. don't play "russian roulette" with your money and nicaragua.
"Water Boy" is correct on his Managua impression except that people do not burn trash in barrels, but burn trash on the street curb. People dump their trash on the street curb and wait, hope, for a "street bum" to walk by with his shopping cart and ask if you want your garbage removed for 25 cents. City garbage collection does exist, but is unpredictable. The "bums" either take the trash to a vacant lot or the drainage canal for disposal.
Granada is the biggest Nicaraguan attraction. Granada was the first city discovered / claimed in the American Hemisphere back in the 1500s: Granda is the oldest city in the American Hemisphere. Granada has a population of 40, 000 residents. Granada has claimed famed for twenty years as being a real estate mecca. Why? Several years back, after the war ended in the 1980s, real estate was cheap. Numerous houses were old, had bad paint, and were falling apart due to neglect. Houses with 10, 000 square feet were being sold for US $40, 000. A few Europeans and North Americans bought these houses, which are town houses, and rehabed the property. They invested money into the property. Naturally, after a few years the property increased in value. This became a marketing ploy to lure foreigners into the region. The local residents increased prices on every piece of property. I don't know who, but Remax and Century 21 opened offices in Granada and started selling property, or attempting to sell property. Presently, the prices of Granada real estate are similar to USA pricing, US $150, 000. US $1, 000, 000. Mortgages are non-exist for foriegners: Non-citizens must acquire the capital for their real estate purchases outside of Nicaragua. North Americans and Europeans must come with cash-in-hand! Paying G8 money to live in the 2nd poorest country in the hemisphere is stupid, foolish, and what they expect North Americans to do. With a population of 40, 000 in Granada and 5, 000 USA-citizens living in Nicaragua the real estate ploy is over-exaggerated.
Granada sits along the Central America's largest lake. Granada has government buildings, townhouses, and churches with pretty paint. Granada has a concrete park with trees encompassing one-city block. The park is the center of attraction. Any SWs that are available will be found in the park. The park has a hostel for backpackers. The main street (calzada) leads from the park to the lake's beachfront (malecon.) The calzada has a few cafes and one sports bar. The sports bar has a nice atmosphere of USA college and professional penants. Across the street from the sports bar is another hostel for backpackers. A few blocks away is some expensive hotel charging US $75 or more per night. The malecon is infested with gang bangers looking to rob tourists, (ie. You.) (Meat Loaf got into a fight with three (3) pandilleros in Granda for defending a local 60-year old couple. Meat Loaf was able to befriend these pandilleros after the rock and stone strowing ceased. Meat Loaf walked the 'hood surrounding the calzada with these pandilleros. Meat Loaf drank beer with the pandilleros, met the gang leader, and learned spent a few hours talking sh*t while watching my back.) As everywhere in Nicargua: Police patrols and protection do not exist. Therefore, Meat Loaf had to protect himself from the malecon back to the plaza back to the bus for Managua. The best way to ensure my protection and to not worry about my safety was to befriend these thugs. This way the gang would not be searching for me in the tourist locations of Granada.
Sites to see in Granada: (1) park; (2) sports bar; (3) malecon; (4) the islands in the middle of the lake via boat or on the church's rooftop; and (5) buildings with pretty paint. All the prices in Granada are over-priced, 1. 5 times the Managua price.
That summarizes Nicaragua's most popular tourist attraction! Again, not worth of an international trip just for one-day experience.
Grand Pollo
07-01-08, 00:20
The real estate situation is "shaky" in Nicaragua since the Sandanistas are back in power. The last time they were in power they stole (privatized) lots of foreign real estate assets. No title company has confidence in Nicaragua and if they do the cost is extremely high.
This is incorrect. There is title insurance readily available here. The Sandanistas are not going to take away foreign owned real estate, in fact the land that was taken away is being repatriated to the original owners.
A proper multiple house/ retirement development will have searched the title to pre-FSLN/civil war days, if there was a change in ownership then the title has to be cleared back to the original owner and then you get title insurance. But most of the land here is still unaffected by the post-Contra war as a lot of that land was farm land that they redistributed , foolishly, to wannabe farmers. Who found out it is one thing to grow pineapples on 1000 acres and make a few bucks and something else (impossible) to do that on the 5 acres the Sandys gave you.
Even with a development you still will of course obtain and insist on title insurance.
If you really read the fine print of the title insurance available in Nicaragua it excludes so many thing that it is basically worthless. The policies I have read basically exclude expropriation, claims and disputes that are undiscovered or unreported, claims related to the revolution, etc, etc.
Not saying it is completely bad, but I do know of claims against title insurance that have gone nowhere for about 3 years. Just get a real good and through, not to mention honest, lawyer and take your chances. I would be real careful with costal property for the next few years in Nicaragua. That I will say.
This is incorrect. There is title insurance readily available here. The Sandanistas are not going to take away foreign owned real estate, in fact the land that was taken away is being repatriated to the original owners.
A proper multiple house/ retirement development will have searched the title to pre-FSLN/civil war days, if there was a change in ownership then the title has to be cleared back to the original owner and then you get title insurance. But most of the land here is still unaffected by the post-Contra war as a lot of that land was farm land that they redistributed , foolishly, to wannabe farmers. Who found out it is one thing to grow pineapples on 1000 acres and make a few bucks and something else (impossible) to do that on the 5 acres the Sandys gave you.
Even with a development you still will of course obtain and insist on title insurance.The real deal is: Nicaragua claimes to want to build a tourism industry, but who has confidence?
Barcelo Hotels bought the old Zamoza resort in Montelimar. Barcelo Hotels made the biggest tourism investment in Nicaragua current history. Barcelo Hotels has been taken to international court in the Hague being sued by the Nicaraguan government for US $25, 000, 000 under some trumped-up payment terms.
F*cking the largest tourism investor isn't too good for future investment!
Venezuela is Nicaragua's role model and all one must do to see Nicaragua's future is to watch Chavez nationalize Venezuela: Cement (Cemex, ) Oil, Banking (Santader, )Telecommmunications (Verizon, ) Electricity (Electricidad de Caracas, ) RCTV television, and many many more. Nicaragua has more of a responsibility to Chavez than any other government in the world.
The land is not being repatriated, but being litigated in the Hague. Filing a lawsuit and winning a lawsuit with judgment enforced are totally different things. It's comparable to ISG readers and ISG posters!
Grand Pollo
08-06-08, 02:54
The Barcelo dispute relates to title insurance how? The argument with Barcelo and Nica is a profit sharing arrangement along the lines of the way movie studios set profit sharing with stars, then work the books so there is no profit.
I am not sure a commercial dispute is being argued in the Hague, but you never know. But apparently there is some question as to the government here having a valid argument .
Nothing to do with titles, and with a proper abodgado and checking the title to avoid repatriation claims you can buy real estate here.
Only an idiot would buy real estate from a thief!
Real estate value is determined by location, location, and location. There's a good reason everyone buys real estate in Costa Rica and Panama. Location and confidence.
People that buy real estate here are gonna be the same whiners that are complaining about the bullshit real estate they bought in the USA under ARM mortgages and are now blaming everyone else. They signed those 100 pages of a mortgage contract.
It will be funny when you loose all of your real estate "investment" in Nicaragua. And that 15% interest rate doesn't help either.
Grand Pollo
08-06-08, 19:48
I am not sure I'd say all vendors are thieves but you make a good point in that other CA countries are probably a lot safer for investments, particularly the two you mention. I doubt that all these projects aimed at foreigners are doomed but they likely have a higher degree of risk than Costa Rica.
The government here doesn't think before it acts a lot, so that scares people off.
I am not sure I'd say all vendors are thieves but you make a good point in that other CA countries are probably a lot safer for investments, particularly the two you mention. I doubt that all these projects aimed at foreigners are doomed but they likely have a higher degree of risk than Costa Rica.
The government here doesn't think before it acts a lot, so that scares people off.Furthermore, Grand Pollo, there are not that many foreign projects in Nicaragua. One could honestly say less than 1,000 units are aimed at foreigners and they are mostly located in San Juan del Sur.
Good Insight Grand Pollo.
Hi,
Any news, suggestions, or advice regarding action in Leon?
Thanks,
G.
Floyd Dylan
01-04-09, 07:47
I took one for the team by venturing to Club Venus. It's a real dive.
The cab was c20 from downtown. It's out on the edge of town, on the highway. C20 to get in. Beers are c25 for you, c40 for girls. There is a stripper pole center, some dim lights, plastic chairs and tables around. Blown speakers blasting soft rock hits and dim cheesy lighting.
The girls are not much to look at, mostly 5's. There were about 8 of them at 10pm on a Saturday night.
Fortunately, the only one who spoke some English approached me, and she was about a 7. I asked her her name about 5 times, and I still can't remember it. It's 3 syllables, does that help?
She was up next to dance, and she really turned it on. Great moves. Really flexible, up and down the pole, upside down, everything came off, classic stuff. OK, I thought, things are looking up. If she's that good on the pole, she must be hot in bed. So after buying her a couple of beers, I said I wanted to fuck her. Por que no, she said. Cute answer ("why not").
It's c300 for half an hour, which is about twice the price in Managua for a similar situation.
The back room is totally skanky. Mold on the walls, stinky toilet, filthy. Oh boy. She wouldn't do BJ sin condom, which was probably to my advantage now that I think about it. She's reasonably good looking, long curly black hair, nice breasts, only only slightly overweight, not great complexion. Heavy blue eye shadow. Tattoos, nose and eyebrow piercings. But she didn't shave her lower legs, weird. Said she was 22, but looked older.
Despite her smoking dance, she was a dead fish in bed. She just laid there, complaining that it hurt and I was too deep. Then she asked me to pull out, grabbed a tissue to wipe blood off the tip of the condom! I guess she was on the end of her rag. Wow, that was an unpleasant surprise. Needless to say, I had trouble getting it back up after all these turnoffs. She wanked me by hand to finish me off, since I had lost the desire to fuck.
All in all, gents, you're better off in Managua.
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Over the past several months lots of media attention has been placed upon the border town of Pena Blancas, Nicaragua, for it prostitution industry.
The "Pan American Hwy." travels through Penas Blancas and is the thoroughfare for international shipping. The town is the border checkpoint for entry / exit in Nicaragua / Costa Rica.
News media articles have exposed the plethora of "teenie" prostitutes renting p*ssy access to the flete of truck drivers that wait their turns to enter C.R. These muchachas (girls) turn tricks inside the semi-trucks.
During the day the hookers can be found selling candy and chicle (bubble gum,) while during the night they are selling vicho (p*ssy.)
The news media reports cite "extreme poverty" as the motive for these "girls" to sell their bodies.
Gringos can be seen en la oficina de la aduana (at the customs office.) Only the most confident or devoted Gringo monger should attempt to this location for P4P.
She's reasonably good looking, long curly black hair, nice breasts, only only slightly overweight, not great complexion. Heavy blue eye shadow. Tattoos, nose and eyebrow piercings. But she didn't shave her lower legs, weird. Said she was 22, but looked older.
Despite her smoking dance, she was a dead fish in bed. She just laid there, complaining that it hurt and I was too deep. Then she asked me to pull out, grabbed a tissue to wipe blood off the tip of the condom! I guess she was on the end of her rag. Wow, that was an unpleasant surprise. Needless to say, I had trouble getting it back up after all these turnoffs. She wanked me by hand to finish me off, since I had lost the desire to fuck.
All in all, gents, you're better off in Managua.
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Fact: Nicaraguan girls do not shave their legs! They may or may not shave their snatch, but the razor stop at the thight or knee area. This applies to all ages.
Fact: Trabajo es trajabo (work is work.) Prostitution is work: Prostitution is a job. And like your job, one must be present during your scheduled shift. The girls will go to the bathroom prior to getting into the bed. They insert a tampon to soak-up the p*ssy blood. Since most guys don't reach the tampon they never know and assume she's tight. If you're wearing a condom you may not feel the plastic tampon hitting your d*ck. Very rarely will girl refuse to f*ck you when she's on her period. They'll tell you some lame ass excuse after the fact.
Managua Mongering Hall of Fame: DrDewman is Inducted
Sometimes those that speak less carry more of a punch and "DrDewman" is such an individual!
DrDewman knows more Chicas Nicas than I.
DrDewman derobes more Chicas Nicas than I.
DrDewman spends more on Chicas Nicas than I.
DrDewman has more "proof" of success than I.
DrDewman takes mongering more serious than I.
DrDewman has more years of experience than I.
DrDewman has earned the privledge of being inducted into the Managua Mongering Hall of Fame and is a verified "superstar."
Despite his inability to speak Spanish, DrDewman scores with the wh*res. DrDewman's techniques have proven to be fail-proof. He may not know the rules of the game, like Donovan McNabb, but DrDewman scores more touchdowns than I, Meat Loaf, have ever experienced.
Congratulations on your induction DrDewman and may you enjoy the fruits of your "hobby."
If one hasn't experienced enough of the hemisphere's second poorest country, Nicaragua, then they should visit the poorest state within the second poorest country of the hemisphere, Carazo: Only Haiti is poorer than Nicaragua within this hemisphere and during Summer 2008 they experienced food riots and starvation.
Leaving Managua one takes Carr. Sur para el Crucero. From el Crucero you go towards Diriamba y Jinotepe. These two cities are located in the departamento del Carazo.
Traveling to Diriamba is a continuous vista of poverty, dirt, litter, and nature.
Within Diriamba are a few reservados (houses of prostitution for select-clients) hidden throughout the small city. Go to the clock tower and turn right. Explore! Up the road 7 km is Jinotepe, the state capital city. Only the most Spanish-fluent monger should venture into this part of the country for their foreigner-appearance will surely invite lots of attention, both positive and negative.
One will not be impressed and may even wonder why visit these cities. I would agree, "why?"
I disclose of this information just in case you wanted to see how much poorer / worse it could be in comparison to Managua.
the closest and most popular beach for capitalinos (residents of managua) is approximately 1-hour away and called "pochomil."
directions: carr. sur para el crucero; el crucero para pochomil / masachapa, but upon arrival to the beach (pacific ocean) choose pochomil (left.)
the road to pochomil is crazy! for approximately 30-minutes, the road makes aggressive turns, corners, and blind spots. the road is built upon the ledge of mountains and if you loose control of your vehicle you will fall off and descend several hundred feet to your death! traffic is fast, furious, and shared by semi-tractors. the road is 100% uphill / downhill, so having "new" brakes is required.
pochomil is a sleepy beach town with bullsh*t sands, rep001tered visitors, and warm waters. hammocks line the beach and cars are permitted to drive along the beach.
horseback rides are available for us $4 per 30-minutes. (almost as inexpenside as the wh*res of mga.) beer is c $35 per liter. a huge fish dinner is us $5. musicians play nicaraguan caribbean music for a fee.
very little infrastructure has been built and a vaction / visit to nicaragua / pochomil is not worth it! better beaches exist in arizona- lake havasu (mispelled.) pochomil, like nicaragua the country itself, is something to do if you have nothing better to do. no real estate; no yachts; no nada!
no semi-naked ladies walk the beach! this is not a beach where you will "pick-up" women or even purchase a piece of p*ssy. this is simple a place that has sand and ocean. bring your own broad (byob.) i, meat loaf, did receive a "blowj*b" while on the beach, but she was my live-in sex employee from 2007. byob. if not, you're pecker will drier than it already is.
a small hotel with limited occupancy is available within the town for us $25 per night.
not much else to write about. this is not an international tourist attraction and only serves as an escape for we "capitalinos."
PeterSmith
02-04-09, 08:25
Is it possible to use an escort agency for a chica in Granada. Managua is relatively close to Granada but I have no idea if the chicas would travel to Granada for work.
Is it possible to use an escort agency for a chica in Granada. Managua is relatively close to Granada but I have no idea if the chicas would travel to Granada for work.
Maybe if the girl(s) already knew you.
Maybe if you had a car.
"Escort Agency?" Are you Elliot Spitzer of New York?
How much do you want to pay?
Nica Bound
02-21-09, 20:33
If you are going to be in-country during March, April, May, it is gonna be HOT and dry. Head north. The newly redone highway from Managua is now in great shape and it is an easy 1 1/2 hour drive to Matagalpa. It is much greener, cooler and is home to a region containing over one million Nicaraguan people, and yes, about half of them are female.
You need some Spanish, or travel with a buddy, who has got some, and you need a bit more adventurous side than just going to SJDS for the weekend.
The only official mongering place is a strip club named "Los Conejos" loosely translated The Bunnies. It is just before entering the main city, located on right hand side of highway, in a separate one story building. Well signed. There is a guard who will watch any vehicle and let you in. Depending on the day of week and time determines clientele and talent. Last there on a Thursday at 9 pm, about 8 ladies and 10 guys hanging out. The ladies are always delighted to see new wallets! You can drink and watch for jsut the price of your beers, but will still have two or three gals over to check you out.
We made our selection quickly and opted for takeout, picking two gals for all night for $50 each. Well worth it! They were glad to get away from the club and performed admirably. Following morning, we fed them and they forced phone numbers on us and we dropped them off in town. Couple of pics of the ladies are in the photo gallery.
Beyond that place, you got to do some real work, my buddy, met a pretty local gal in a pharmacy, asked for her number, got it easily and enjoyed the true GFE for several days.
Just beyond Matagalpa, over the mountains, is the hideaway town of Jinotega. Over 3, 000 ft. Higher elevation, even cooler and greener. No time to do any recon on that visit, but next trip north, I hope.
Look it up in a guidebook. Worth the time.
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If you are going to be in-country during March, April, May, it is gonna be HOT and dry. Head north. The newly redone highway from Managua is now in great shape and it is an easy 1 1/2 hour drive to Matagalpa. It is much greener, cooler and is home to a region containing over one million Nicaraguan people, and yes, about half of them are female.
You need some Spanish, or travel with a buddy, who has got some, and you need a bit more adventurous side than just going to SJDS for the weekend.
The only official mongering place is a strip club named "Los Conejos" loosely translated The Bunnies. It is just before entering the main city, located on right hand side of highway, in a separate one story building. Well signed. There is a guard who will watch any vehicle and let you in. Depending on the day of week and time determines clientele and talent. Last there on a Thursday at 9 pm, about 8 ladies and 10 guys hanging out. The ladies are always delighted to see new wallets! You can drink and watch for jsut the price of your beers, but will still have two or three gals over to check you out.
We made our selection quickly and opted for takeout, picking two gals for all night for $50 each. Well worth it! They were glad to get away from the club and performed admirably. Following morning, we fed them and they forced phone numbers on us and we dropped them off in town. Couple of pics of the ladies are in the photo gallery.
Beyond that place, you got to do some real work, my buddy, met a pretty local gal in a pharmacy, asked for her number, got it easily and enjoyed the true GFE for several days.
Just beyond Matagalpa, over the mountains, is the hideaway town of Jinotega. Over 3, 000 ft. Higher elevation, even cooler and greener. No time to do any recon on that visit, but next trip north, I hope.
Look it up in a guidebook. Worth the time.
EDITOR'S NOTE: I would suggest that the author or another Forum Member consider posting a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please Click Here (http://www.internationalsexguide.info/forum/announcement-reportsofdistinction.php?) for more information.
Good report! Finally, something of value.
Matalgalpa & Nueva Segovia are where all the "chelas" are and come from.
It's a cooler city due to the mountain climate and is dominated by capisinos (farmers.)
Once again,
I, Meat Loaf, do not recommend Granada as an international tourist destination nor mongering location!
Granada: (1) old buildings with pretty paint, (2) the history of being the oldest city in the American Hemisphere, (3) the islands in the middle of the lake, (4) the church observation deck, and the (5) calzada (walkway) leading to the malecon (walkway along the lake.)
You will see lots of Gringos passing through. The sight of Gringos does not equate to "tourist destination." It simply means that they bought the above vacationers expereince.
The few hookers they have sell a*s in the park.
Granada, no vale verga (aint worth sh*t.)
Don't get tricked into visiting Granada the same way you got tricked into marriage, fatherhood, or that sub-prime mortgage and the second-mortgage you took on it.
On this thread I reveal more about Granada so do your research.
Floyd Dylan
03-13-09, 01:38
They insert a tampon to soak-up the p*ssy blood. Since most guys don't reach the tampon they never know and assume she's tight. If you're wearing a condom you may not feel the plastic tampon hitting your d*ck. Very rarely will girl refuse to f*ck you when she's on her period. They'll tell you some lame ass excuse after the fact.That's disgusting. Good information to know, but I kinda wish I didn't. LOL.
There-s a nice little puteria down by the Rio san juan. It's got a nice porch that kind of hangs right over the river, and is quite cool, usually with a nice breeze blowing. Very pleasant place to spend a few hours in the afternoon, when it is quieter and the locals and too drunk and rowdy. Open's around noon.
There's usually anywhere from 3-8 ladies hanging around with about 6 rooms available. There's only pop and beer for sale, I think to keep the locals from getting completely smashed, which they eventually do anyway. There's the usual collection of Nica chubbies but a few doable semi-flacas as well. The price is 20$us for foreigners, strictly enforced no matter what, and only 150 cords, Meat Loaf's famous 7. 50, for the locals.
I've had 4 so far this week, one very pretty morena clara, Rubi, who isn't really all that much into it but is a joy to roll around with naked. She has a very hairy bush which is a nice treat in today's all bald fashion.
I took one chubbie last night, Karen that got totally into it, DFK and bitiing a bit too much. Nice big fat bald pussy to bang.
Most local foreigners seem to think that it's a very dangerous place and will not recommend going. If you are a bit street smart and confident of spending a bit of time in local semi dumps you will be fine, especially earlier in the day. At night it's really ok as well, but if you're worried the doorman will call a cab for a ride home, which is actually more of a concern that with any trouble inside. There is security and you have to pass through a locked gate to get in. Of course speaking Spanish helps greatly, as I do.
Sorry, I don't even know the name, there is no sign out front but the locals call it something or other. To get there just follow the main street of San Juan out of town as it approaches the river, its maybe only about a 600 meter walk, and you have to turn right as you hit the river, just beyond a big crab restaurant. There are 2 or 3 really dumpy places on the way, all on the left side. I recommend giving them a pass and continue about 50 meters to the end. There is a store out front with an iron gate and the bar and rooms are in the back. No pressure to take a girl and in fact you will have to be the one to initiate contact.
Yesterday I had half a dozen ice cold Tonas and banged a horny gordita, 25 bucks well spent.
I'm off to a little pueblilto on the lake this afternoon called San Jorge where there is apparently a little brothel.
Will report later.
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Nica Bound
03-16-09, 19:30
Great update, Huevonn. Had takeout from there one time. Place is more for locals, so selection is often spotty. IMHO.
Do give us a report on San Jorge findings. And some directions.
Made it out to Playa Hermosa, the name of the brothel in the little lake town of San Jose, about a 10 minute drive from Rivas. It's a nice little town with a few good restaurants right on the lake. One, El Fogon is run by an Italian who can really cook, which is a nice change from the drab Nica food.
Unfortunately it was a dead night in a huge cavernous kind of night club, with one haggard and hung over negrita from Bluefields hanging out and not too interested in clients, of which I could not imagine being. There was a big stage and I was assured that usually there are lots of women and they put on shows. I kind of doubt it and won't be back.
In the next few days I'm heading up to Esteli, where I am told the most beautiful women in Nicaragua are from. There's scant information on here, anyone had any fun up there?
BTW Rivas has one club with chicas that I know of, La Pantera Rosa I believe.
I popped in but it looked liked it was packed with drunk locals and the music was blaring some super loud regaton crap so I couldn't be bothered staying.
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Made it out to Playa Hermosa, the name of the brothel in the little lake town of San Jose, about a 10 minute drive from Rivas. It's a nice little town with a few good restaurants right on the lake. One, El Fogon is run by an Italian who can really cook, which is a nice change from the drab Nica food.
Unfortunately it was a dead night in a huge cavernous kind of night club, with one haggard and hung over negrita from Bluefields hanging out and not too interested in clients, of which I could not imagine being. There was a big stage and I was assured that usually there are lots of women and they put on shows. I kind of doubt it and won't be back.
In the next few days I'm heading up to Esteli, where I am told the most beautiful women in Nicaragua are from. There's scant information on here, anyone had any fun up there?
BTW Rivas has one club with chicas that I know of, La Pantera Rosa I believe.
I popped in but it looked liked it was packed with drunk locals and the music was blaring some super loud regaton crap so I couldn't be bothered staying.
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12 Years ago I listen to Reggaeton in Puerto Rico, before it became commercialized.
Why does Reggaeton only have 8 artists and they are all from Puerto Rico. Don't about 15 countries speak Spanish?
Reggaeton is "USA lifestyle bullshit" imitated by Puerto Ricans who might earn the money 'cause they are USA, but the rest of Latin America never will.
¡Falsantes!
Discovered a nice tranquilo house last week, in San Juan del Sur.
Actually I'd been checking it out for a while but finally some chicas showed up.
It's on the road just past the Pali grocery store by about 50 m if you are heading into town. Hang a left and go down about 100m, it's just past the cemetary on the left hand side with a big Pepsi sign out front that says Bar Restaurant y Alojamiento. At the side of the house you will see a neon Marlboro sign above the entrance. That's where the bar and ladies are.
I'd been popping a bit as it's on my way home and having a beer with the owner, a nice guy in his late 20's. I liked the place because it was cool inside and with an ambiente muy tranquilo. The guy kept saying that he was waiting for chicas from Managua but that they just weren't showing up.
Anyways last week I popped in agian and there were, surprise! three cute, young, friendly chicas.
Actually the prettiest of them all was a tall slim and really pretty sexy blond, wearing tiny cut off jeans and a slinky top. Unfortunately she is the owner[s wife and not on the menu!
I had a few beers and chatted with one of the other chavas, slim and pretty and very friendly.
We ended up in the back room and I had a great time, usual 20$ gringo price for half an hour but we went over, no problem. Much nicer and cleaner rooms than anywhere else. Took a shower together where she started BBBJ and full on DFK, etc total GFE. Gave her bald carnita a nice licking and she came while pounding, quite tight and super wet.
She told be that she used to work in a massage place and gives super massages. I went back last night to try one as my back was kind of sore but she had returned to Managua already.
However a new cutie had arrived. She looked quite young and indeed was only 18, very morena looking with big doe eyes and maybe 5 feet tall.
Went back with her and started kissing slowly for quite a while, till she warmed up and when I reached down into her panties she was indeed soaking wet. Gave her a good licking till she bucked like crazy then slowly put it in.
She was super tight and I had to be very gentle and actually couldn't get it all the way in. We necked like teenagers while cogiendo and finally I came. Took a shower together and that was that.
I might go back this week if I don't make it up to Esteli.
One night last week and older lady came in, slim and quite sexy, looked to be in her 50's.
Her and the owner and his sexy wife sat at a table and were kind of arguing for about half an hour till the older lady left. The dude told me that she is his mom and that she is threatening to take the bar back and turn it into a straight up hotel, she doesn't like the putas.
Had to laugh, mother, son and daughter in law discussing the family *****house...
As I was leaving last night three gringos showed up, to my surprise, as no one usually makes it out this way, it's the road that leads into the barrio. Not that it's dangerous but it's just not well traveled. They had a young Nico with them that had obviously brought them there as a nice safe alternative to the places down by the river. The main place that I mentioned earlier, btw, is called 'El Flotante' -the floater- as it indeed appears that the bar area is floating above the river.
Wonder how they made out and I hope they were gentle with the young tighty...
'Oh Sh*t! Granada, Nicaragua, is great!
Antes, Granada was weak and boring as hell! No vale verga! (Wasn't worth d*ck.) Ahora, it's tuani (cool.)
Lesson #1: Don't purchase anything in Nicaragua until you've learned the market. They've been "selling dreams" since the 1980s. Rent first, learn if you can SURVIVE Nicaragua, and then purchase.
Granada is a tourist town! What's up Europe? What's up Brazil?
800,000 tourists, that visit Nicaragua annually. Almost everyone visits Granada.
What is Granada? One street! La Calzada.
The women are gorgeous. Every local is on the hustle.
Languages from all over the world will be heard.
Strong, bastante, demesiado, police presence. (In Managua we have 0% police.)
For a local like myself, this will be easy victories. The tourist girls plus the locals.
Granada population is 40,000. Managua is 2,500,000.
To win, you must approach the market in "tourist mode." Bang the fellow tourists. If you live local, you can get some sex-employees that are local, and bang tourists cause you're local. Meat Loaf Strategy Revealed!
Is Granada worth international travel? No.
Is Granada worth residence? Yes. Rent everything. Don't come into town and get tricked by Coldwell Banker, Remax, Centruy 21 into buying property. You need to learn the area (ie. Masays, Granada, Carazo, Managua.)
Carne Molida!
Granada offers nothing more than hostel housing, hotel housing, and cantinas / cafes lining the main street, which is Granada- La Calzada.
Tourist p*ssy is easy! It's a sea of white girl p*ssy and I'm getting USA home-sick. Jungle Fever!
English is the base language, but languages from all of Europe, Brazil, and Spanish will be heard.
Again, not worth international travel. Worth residence.
I, "Meat Loaf," spit game to a sex veteran (ie. woman over 40.) She wants the d*ck! I spit game at another dame who was wearing a thong bikini. I spit game at the tourists.
In Granada the girls will talk to you on the street. In Managua, it's all US $7.50.
Locals (ie. Nicas) that speak English are those that have been deported (ie. most of the time.) Strong police protection. After paying a bribe the night before, I was trying to keep my money in my pocket.
Granada is wide-open!
On the road to Granada to watch the International Tourist suntan naked on the playa.
Can you compete on the street with these European, North American, South American tourists, plus chavalas son la ciudad? Yo se: Vos no puede hacer ni verga!
How about picking-up a few million dollars in business transactions at the same time?
That's how you play the international game! Hard! If you can't compete within your domestic market (ie. Child Custody / Child Support Enforcement / Family Court) than you cannot get outside (ie. leave the country.) Get structured properly (ie. business, source of income, Family Court) and then you can be an international player.
Life is Great in Nicaragua: I invite you to Nicaragua!
"Vos" and "puede" don't go together.
"Vos" and "puede" don't go together.
Thank you and you are correct!
We communicated though, right?
"Vos" and "puede" don't go together.
Trying to be a smart ass hugh, "Dickhead." Good job, 'cause I do think I know everything. I'm a damn fool!
North Americans traveling Central America via "Backpacks."
You guys are broke. You have to look at the prices of everything before purchase. How sad! If p*ssy cost US $7.50, how cheap do you think food is? LOL.
The citizens (Nicaraguense) have little respect for the backpackers 'cause they are "penny pinchers." Bring some money. This is the #1 Poorest Spanish Country in the world and the #2 poorest country in the hemisphere and you still can't compete (ie. watching / guarding pennies.)
Tica Bus and a few other lines have bus stops in Granada that take them to Costa Rica or Honduras.
Backpackers stay at one of the many hostel for US $10 per night. Of course you'll never reach my stature, "Me Loaf," living like that.
Backpackers, bring at least US $50 for Granada. They're coming to Granada with US $10 for the room, US $2 for a hot dog, and US $7.50 for some beans.
You're not even competitive in Nicaragua and the local girls won't even waste their time with you.
When you earn "street cred" in the streets of Managua, you earn / gain / take respect on the streets of other cities.
Taxi from Granada to Managua for the Gringo , US $50.
When you're a capitalino this same taxi ride is US $5. And that includes a free gaseosa (ie. soft drik.)
The girls (ie. locals and international tourists) are all over the big city boys. They want that 20% for 18 - 25 years! We got that birth control shot for them as to prevent getting played and self-assurance.
Anyway, we got (1) fat boys, (2) softtail custom,(3) Rocker, and a few more lines. Bring your money to Nicaragua 'cause these cost US $650 per month.
Purchase your Harley Davidson and drive to Granada. Enjoy the Calzada where everyone is international (800,000) and enjoy Nicaragua. It's not Monaco, but they're trying satisfactory. After all, it's only the oldest city in the American Hemisphere (ie. since 1492.)
Granada Island
Do you have what it takes to purchase your very own island, 21 acres, for US $500,000? It's available. It's only 25 minutes via launcha (ie. boat) from the city shoreline.
You need to bring cash-in-hand. Bring financing from overseas, but in the current market you must have solid capacitity (ie. credit.)
Ometepe Island
If you can't play on this level, we have Ometepe Island. The launcha from the shoreline is C $200 for the tour.
From the city church you can see the islands, for C$ 100.
It's a nice experience for a date (ie. cita.)
Grand Pollo, International Sex Guide Senior Member since 04-02-04, is Inducted into the Managua Mongering Hall of Fame.
For years, until I, Meat Loaf, joined iSG, Grand Pollo paved the way. It was the wisdom, experience, and truth of Grand Pollo that "opened up" Nicaragua for mongers.
Grand Pollo's experience throughout the country from border-to-border; his knowledge of brothels and crime; and his expertise in the goings on of Nicaragua has earned Grand Pollo an induction into the Mangua Mongering Hall of Fame.
May we all aspire to reach the pinnacle of Managua Mongering and be "blessed" into the Mangua Mongering Hall of Fame.
Sometimes those with the most power are the most quiet and Grand Pollo is one such individual. For all of the bragadocia delivered by Meat Loaf is entertaining, but the gentlemanly qualities of Grand Pollo speak volumes. Grand Pollo is truly a remarkable gentleman and despite our "playful banter," it has been a privledge learning Nicaragua from his posts dating back six (6) years.
Grand Pollo is Inducted into the Managua Mongering Hall of Fame.
Nica Bound
04-10-09, 18:30
After a couple of dozen times driving thru Masaya on the way to Granada, Rivas, SJDS or Costa Rica, the ardent traveler will finally stop staring at the volcanic smoke plumes and start examining the local attractions. Directly across the Carretera Masaya from the entrance to Masaya Volcano National Park is a collection of neon signs marking Dina's Bar and Dina's Restaurant. Had been hearing for some time that this was also a place with chicas desnudas.
So on a recent afternoon, we took the old pickup and two members of my Nica posse and stopped in to check it out. It was very early for Nicaragua, 6pm, so we were loudly received and immediately doubled the bar population. The place is an open air stage with two dancing poles, some wooded tables, large DJ area and not much else. Outside is a circular swimming pool, some more covered tables and some bungalow rooms.
There were 7 chicas on site, though we actually saw only 3, as the others were apparently resting up for a big night. Average looks would be kind to these gals. After a few preguntas we were told that nude dances were available for $ 20 and that full service, todos incluido, was priced at $ 60. Ouch ! And outrageous ! My NICA wing men received the same answer when inquiring for non gringo pricing.
We still had standards, low though they might be, so instead had a few cold beers and left. No worse for our new addition to the Nicaragua travel guide.
Would not repeat, recommend, or stop for hitch hikers here in the future. Your mileage may vary here, but probably not in a good way !
--
After a couple of dozen times driving thru Masaya on the way to Granada, Rivas, SJDS or Costa Rica, the ardent traveler will finally stop staring at the volcanic smoke plumes and start examining the local attractions. Directly across the Carretera Masaya from the entrance to Masaya Volcano National Park is a collection of neon signs marking Dina's Bar and Dina's Restaurant. Had been hearing for some time that this was also a place with chicas desnudas.
So on a recent afternoon, we took the old pickup and two members of my Nica posse and stopped in to check it out. It was very early for Nicaragua, 6pm, so we were loudly received and immediately doubled the bar population. The place is an open air stage with two dancing poles, some wooded tables, large DJ area and not much else. Outside is a circular swimming pool, some more covered tables and some bungalow rooms.
There were 7 chicas on site, though we actually saw only 3, as the others were apparently resting up for a big night. Average looks would be kind to these gals. After a few preguntas we were told that nude dances were available for $ 20 and that full service, todos incluido, was priced at $ 60. Ouch ! And outrageous ! My NICA wing men received the same answer when inquiring for non gringo pricing.
We still had standards, low though they might be, so instead had a few cold beers and left. No worse for our new addition to the Nicaragua travel guide.
Would not repeat, recommend, or stop for hitch hikers here in the future. Your mileage may vary here, but probably not in a good way !
--
I'm such a poser / "kiss ass" that immediately after reading Nica Bound's post on "Dina #2," I went to see for myself.
Nica Bound, like usual, is 110% correct that the hoes at this dive are "hood rats" / "cluckers" / "stank hoes."
So I entered with two carnales (ie. homies) and was pleasantly impressed. I witnessed for fact the four foot high stage with two stripper poles, just like Nica Bound detailed.
Alongside the stage is a nice size bar with cashier who accepts credit cards. Behind the stage is a patio area that takes you bungaloos.
Due to "Samana Santa," they only had two "cluckers" (ie. chicken head) working- 1 Negra Flaca y 1 Blanca Champu (ie. cheap; of low quality.) Of course, the Blanca wanted some "Meat Loaf," but her legs had more scars than Rocky Dennis (ie. Mask the movie with Cher from the 1980s.)
I was impressed at this location having two swimming pools and an large outside patio with individual canopies.
As is custom in Nicaragua, families were present at the brothel. What? Yes, families were present. Ninos, ninas, abuelas, padres, madres y putas. ¿Que mas quiere?
This location no vale la panocha (ie. aint worth p*ssy.)
Nica Bound, as usual, is correct on the low quality of this putera (ie. brothel.)
Recommendation: Take your very own piece of p*ssy and enjoy the pool, strip show, and access to the bungalows. Those "cluckers" were stupid in quoting US $50 per polvo (ie. ejaculation.)
Lastly, the Blanca held negotiations on sex-employment, but was confused 'cause she said you guys (ie. dumb a*s Gringos) pay US $150 per night to f*ck her servicio dormicilio. She tried to say she makes US $3,000 per month.
No me mames, puta. El presidente commandante Daniel Ortego gana US $36,000 per year as his salary.
Nica Bound is 110% correct: Never doubt this "Managua Mongering Hall of Fame" aspirant!
When you earn "street cred" in the streets of Managua, you earn / gain / take respect on the streets of other cities.
Taxi from Granada to Managua for the Gringo , US $50.
When you're a capitalino this same taxi ride is US $5. And that includes a free gaseosa (ie. soft drik.)
The girls (ie. locals and international tourists) are all over the big city boys. They want that 20% for 18 - 25 years! We got that birth control shot for them as to prevent getting played and self-assurance.
Stranded we were in Granada. Game we have.
Learning from last time, we went to the Esso gas station to catch a taxi from Granada to Masaya to Managua to the Ghetto (ie. Reparto Schick, San Judas, Altagracia.) Los mamones (ie. blood suckers) were quoting high, US $50 for the trip. And that were the taxis who offered. The others said "no, Managua es peligroso."
We loitered, which does not exist in Nicaragua, at the gasolinera for about 2 hours propositioning taxis and caminonetas. We even asked the police to take us to jail so we may benefit from the free room-and-board. La patrulla refused.
My "road dogg" (ie. wingman) is learning the art of sales / brokerage 'cause he was exhibiting stellar negotiation skills. All the hours he sits alongside the Executive Desk are and have paid off handsomely. He's talking everyone down on pricing and charging usery rates to prospects, all under 100% transparency. He's even stating "100% transparency" in everyday conversation.
He negotiated a ride from a trailero (ie. truck driver) for C$400. Caro. But that included two (2) free Maruchan soups, which were delicious.
In the camino (ie. semi truck) we rolled.
I, Meat Loaf, am a major fan of semi-trucks. As a youth, I held possession to many truck toys. As an adult, I've test driven trucks; rode across Mexico in trucks; and visit those famous USA truck stops (ie. Torrence Ave, Toledo, OKC.) I wanted to be a truck driver for profession, but chose International Finance instead.
Peterbuilt, Freightliner, Kenworth, GMC, Mack, International, Volvo.
Remember, we're in Latin America so all semi-trucks have bald tires! Remember, we're in Latin America so all semi-trucks have inoperable trailer lights. This is Latin America where the trucks are flat nosed.
In the cab we sat. Conversation was held on Bluefields, Puerto Cabeza y Corinto. Invited we were to Corinto, but denied the opporuntity.
Por fin (ie. finally,) we arrived in MGA. Muchisimas Gracias were delivered and Fred-and-Barney (ie. walking) commenced.
On the other side of MGA we were. No taxis existed anywhere in the city. This weekend nobody works. And this is Nicaragua where nobody works, anyway!
In chanelas (ie. sandals) we walked las calles de Managua por la madrugada (ie. wee-hours of the morning.) Por el apoyo de Dios (ie. by the gift of God) we caught a taxi to el barrio.
Many other stranded persons at the gasolinera suggested we sleep in the grass alongside the others. But I'm a Gringo and can't go out like that, so pay I did. Money doesn't matter when you're Meat Loaf in Nicaragua with C$ 1,000,000 disponible.
Premise: Due to skin-tone, we were given confidence to travel with the camioneros (ie. truck drivers.) They never knew we were / are Gringos, despite the English conversation. La Costa, baby. Had we been visible tourists in Granada, they - los taxistas wanted US $50. ¡Por favor buey puta!
We're straight soldiers with advanced degrees, conversation, and allies who can get "gully side" or "high side." Honestly, I was tired of drinking for 17 hours and wanted to sleep in my bed, so price was irrelevant.
"Brotha's gonna work it out" by Willie Hutch.
So on the calzada we sat drinking beer, building our social network, and "spittin' game" to the females. La calzada is the entirety of what makes Granada. It is on the calzada that you will spend your time at one of the many outdoor cafes that line the street from the park to the lake.
Un amigo, introduced us to some girls (5) who sat at the neighboring table. The females came to our table where we shared adult beverages.
What Good Luck we have: Every Chica Nica in this friendship group of five (5) was employed! What? Yes, they "were employeed." (These girls obviously have experience interacting with Gringos 'cause they said they had jobs.)
One girl (ie. en busca del bobo) claimed to be an accountant (ie. monthly salary of US $150.) Her friend (ie. toda abierta) was the "ring leader." Pelo crespo sat alongside me holding my hand. Esa puta (ie. girl #4) sat alongside her. And a newcomber (ie. girl #5) sat at the head of the table.
In the words of DrDewman, "I'd do all of them!"
Price? Gratis.
So the hoes sat at our table sharing bs conversation. After two sips of the Tona Liter, they revealed their "true profession."
En busca del bobo stated she doesn't need to work 'cause she make US $400 per month prostituting La Calzada en busca los Gringos babosos (ie. bobo / clown / fools / suckers.) She opens her doors / lips for business from 2000 - 2400 hours.
The girls thought they had some bobos in their mist, but were wrong. They invited us to the disco. I asked who's paying? They said I was: 5 girls plus 2 guys = C $350 entrada. Mas tragos (ie. drinks.) Por favor!
They called me cheap! I disagreed: I'm stingy (ie. soy tacano.) Cheap is a term relating to quality.
As true professionals, they offered us sex-for-pay. Curiously, I asked the price. They responded US $30 - US $50 per polvo, per 30-minute sessions, plus hotel (ie. US $30.) B*tch Please! "'Yall some dumb a*s girls," was stated by "Meat Loaf."
The hoes left in anger. Two hours later we saw the girls trying the same technique on a Gringo table. Maybe they'll win 'cause Gringos don't speak Spanish and "cut their teeth" on the gully side.
No soy un bobo, oyiste cabrona. Soy de Managua.
En la calzada, Granada, it's prostitution central. Areas of similar ambiance are Del Rey Hotel, Costa Rica; Veneto Hotel, Panama; Tijiuna, Mexico; and your neighborhood USA nightclub.
¡Soy el cazador y ella es la presa!
What I'm looking for:
1. White girls from Scandanavia. They have beautiful milky white skin. In contrast, the "white Nicas" have blotches.
2. White surfer girls (ie. 20 and 30-year olds) from North America looking for some "Gangster D*ck."
3. White Mature women (ie. divorced; adulterers) on vacation with her friends.
4. Local Nicaraguan population.
5. More white girls.
Top $ paid for a white girl(s) from Finland, Norway, and / or Sweden. How much? C $150: The cost of p*ssy.
P.S. I don't want no "fat ass" white girl. Imagine me returning home (ie. USA) with some "sloppy jallopy" talking about 20% for 18 - 25 years. My mother would be embarrassed! At least bring home a cute, brown girl from Nicaragua, is her request.
Meat Loaf has arrived to conquer European and North American tourists, with some Nicas sprinkled throughout.
¡Soy el cazador y ella es la presa!
What I'm looking for:
1. White girls from Scandanavia. They have beautiful milky white skin. In contrast, the "white Nicas" have blotches.
2. White surfer girls (ie. 20 and 30-year olds) from North America looking for some "Gangster D*ck."
3. White Mature women (ie. divorced; adulterers) on vacation with her friends.
4. Local Nicaraguan population.
5. More white girls.
Top $ paid for a white girl(s) from Finland, Norway, and / or Sweden. How much? C $150: The cost of p*ssy.
P.S. I don't want no "fat ass" white girl. Imagine me returning home (ie. USA) with some "sloppy jallopy" talking about 20% for 18 - 25 years. My mother would be embarrassed! At least bring home a cute, brown girl from Nicaragua, is her request.
With the new no visa requirement hopefully the Ukrainian girls will be arriving soon.
Xdred
With the new no visa requirement hopefully the Ukrainian girls will be arriving soon.
Xdred
Ukraine?
They know all of the "mail order scams."
What, you've been reading Nicaraguan Immigration Treaties?
I try to only bang women that are citizens of countries I don't mind visiting. For example, if she lives in Moscow, I'm never going to visit her and the baby she'll "pin on me" for the 20% for 18 - 25 years; but Latin America I will visit.
just as most of you lurk, some of you switch hit!
granada is over-flowing with gay nicaraguan guys! managua has a lot of gay nicaraguan guys working / owning brothels: managua also has a lot of gay teenagers and ****s.
everywhere you look they are visible, with confidence! they range from teenagers to thirty-somethings. they say that granada has less compeition than managua. they say the tourists like a little sausage when overseas. they prostitute and also look for some local action (ie. boyfriend / boyfriend relationship.)
i don't know the percentage of gay people in granada 'cause it's only my third day, but it is a lot! they even have transexuals walking the street!
i've never been to key west, florida, usa, but granada may resemble that beach town.
advice: don't drop the soap or tie your shoe 'cause you might get stuck!
p.s. i don't discriminate against anyone. truth be told, i like gay guys! why? the more guys they chase after, the less competition i have for the pink stuff (ie. f*cking women.)
we've had this discussion regarding gringos (ie. missionaries / christians) populating nicaragua. i, meat loaf, contend that 50% - 80% of all gringos in nicaragua are here "bible thumping."
"holy rollers."
(some of you posters were introduced to nicaragua under the same regime. you know who you are. lol.)
only a few gringos (ie. meat loaf) reside in nicaragua with 0% alterior motives!
so, i reside near a residence that houses "backpackers." anteayer (ie. the day before yesterday) i saw one broad in her "compound" with two-piece bikini. she doesn't look like much, but it is "something / someone to do!"
they don't appear to be "holy rollers," but "true gringo backpackers."
a little further down the street are the "holy rollers." they have a tremendous amount of traffic passing before my home, daily. already, i've jumped on three (3) of the girls.
i want to f*ck this cute blonde. she's tall. she responded with eagerness when i saluted her. she was cute with her gorra (ie. baseball style hat.) she's a "holly roller."
(i talk to them in non-accented midwestern english so they know i'm american. i then switch to spanish so they know i'm deep into the society. i then switch back to non-accented midwestern english. it is at this point that they stop and respond with conversation.)
do "holly rollers" fuck? yes! remember, this is a vacation for them and "bible thumping" is the excuse / justification!
strategy: attend church service; scope out the girls in the congregation; disclose who is meat loaf; invite to home; lay pipe 100% discretely and with the confidence of her church peers / our neighbors.
i've implemented the strategy using publicity, but can't disclose too much for security reasons and "player haters."
remember, most gringos in nicaragua are poor! not meat loaf: i'm a millionare (ie. c$ 1,000,000.) they need money to survive just like the local nicaraguans. they see my wardrobe; they see my residence; they see my vehicle(s.) conclusion: i see the pink! vale: us $0 and if not, at most c$ 150 per polvo.
this will be easy / fun pickings as i sit on my porch typing isg posts.
The city blocks are huge!
The sun is unbearable! The streets have 0% shade so at 1100 - 1700 you will bake like Betty Crocker. Buy an umbrella for shade when walking outside.
Without a bicycle you will get tired, real quick! Bicycle rental per day is US $30.
Your other options of inner-city transporation are taxi (ie. US $0.50 - $1.00 per fare.) Horse-and-Buggy fare of US $0.25.
You need either a (1) bicycle, (2) scooter, (3) motorcycle, (4) car, or (5) patience as you wait for a taxi.
Buy a pair of good-ass walking shoes (ie. Rockports.)
A bicycle is required for Granada as evidenced by every citizen owning one. It resembles Asia with everyone riding bikes except in Nicaragua the bicycle will have two or three passengers, not 1.
Ukraine?
They know all of the "mail order scams."
What, you've been reading Nicaraguan Immigration Treaties?
I try to only bang women that are citizens of countries I don't mind visiting. For example, if she lives in Moscow, I'm never going to visit her and the baby she'll "pin on me" for the 20% for 18 - 25 years; but Latin America I will visit.
What I am referring to is the recent decision by the Nicaraguan government to not require a prior entry visa for tourists entering the country of any nationality. The only requirement is a valid passport with minimum six months until expiration. This is an attempt to increase tourism.
To my knowledge Nicaragua is the only country in the world with such an open door policy.
This is an open invitation to criminal elements from around the world i.e. Nigeria, Russia to freely enter and set-up shop.
If the Russians come maybe they will bring the girls. With the pussy prices in Nicaragua very doubtful but who knows.
LOL
Xdred
What I am referring to is the recent decision by the Nicaraguan government to not require a prior entry visa for tourists entering the country of any nationality. The only requirement is a valid passport with minimum six months until expiration. This is an attempt to increase tourism.
To my knowledge Nicaragua is the only country in the world with such an open door policy.
This is an open invitation to criminal elements from around the world i.e. Nigeria, Russia to freely enter and set-up shop.
If the Russians come maybe they will bring the girls. With the pussy prices in Nicaragua very doubtful but who knows.
LOL
Xdred
One advantage, the biggest advantage, of Nicaragua citizenship is that they (ie. Nicaragua citizens) do not need visa stamps to enter approximately 100 countries! All they need is the same 6-month availability.
Lots of countries don't require that visa stamp prior to entry.
Keep up the good writing: You're gaining more confidence and exposure in your postings. Good job.
Chinchuliar
05-08-09, 21:39
If the Russians come maybe they will bring the girls.The Russians are looking around. They bring girls, their own girls, so hands off. They have guns, bodyguards and don't smile even with a bottle of Gran Reserva down them.
You're never too young to start your career!
George, a street conversationalist, who claims 13 years of age but an active attendee in the sexto grado (ie. sixth grade) proved this fact.
He's a cool a*s person! FACT.
I and Loco Lady (ie. Year 2007) were sitting at the outdoor cafe after having Loco Lady playto (ie. talking sh*t; arguments; anger; etcetera) for the hour prior when George approached our table. He walked up and said in very clean English, "Hi, I'm George. What's your name?" I replied with my name. George asked where I was from. I told him Managua. He didn't believe it. I repeated Managua. He began playful banter as if an adult. The waiter came over to "shoo" George away since the owner was sitting at the table behind me. I asked George if he wanted to share conversation over a gaseosa (ie. soda.) He accepted. The waiter was impressed and smiled.
The waiter returned with a Fanta Naranja when I order a Rojita (ie. the trademark design for this brand is a Native American.) George replied, "No problem." How professional and grateful. George, a street conversationalist younger than 13 years of age has more "cooth" than the entire population of Managua that I encountered for three (3) years! FACT.
George's topics of conversation / world knowledge / and quick mental faculties is / was truly amazing. I and Loco Lady were extremely impressed!
George is a prime example of Nicaragua and the fact that "husteling up" money is not age specific.
I thought to myself, "How can I make money off of / with / using George?" Of course in a good professional way. If I were Nicaraguan I could ignore Child Labor Laws, but I'm a USA citizen and can't engage in this behaivor unless I receive a parental waiver. This is just noise that I write in this paragraph.
George talked in English and Spanish with the same fluency as I, an adult who has studied Spanish for twelve (12) years!
George sat with us for approximately thrity (30) minutes.
He truly is a great person and I can only wonder what his life will become in the next fifteen (15) years. Hopefully it will become something professional.
I encouraged George to stay in school, continue studying English, and to graduate from the university.
I asked / warned George of the youth and pega (ie. glue sniffing.) He said he does not and will not engage in cemento (ie. glue sniffing.)
I reached into my wallet and gave George C $40 (US $2.) He said, "Thank You!" What? Nicaraguan Adults Never Say Thank You! This youth should be the poster child of Nicaragua- the country.
He said his mom supports the home by hand washing clothes which is a job! The price per dozen (12) pieces is C$ 25 (US $1.25) He said he had two (2) older brothers.
In Nicaragua with these situations it is best to not delve too deep into the home life. The time was 2300 / 11 p.m. George knew that the moon has been a full moon for the past four (4) days! This may mean that George is homeless and sleeps outside. I, Meat Loaf, noticed the full moon on my first day, but that's because I'm new to the city and am observing / learning everything.
George said he lived in Costa Rica and knew Guanacaste y Punta Arenas!
George said he uses his passport frequently!
Was George a adult midget posing as a child? No, he really is a child!
If I would have had more money in my pocket I most certainly would have given George C$ 500 / US $25. I can honestly see George earning US $20 propinas from Granada Tourists simply based upon his conversation.
I look forward to seeing him again and hopefully you will meet George when you visit Granada. Or hopefully George will regain the "privledge" of becoming a child and not having to "hustle up" income for SURVIVAL.
Everyone (ie. Loco Lady, I, the restaurant) agree that George grew up fast and hopefully doesn't get too exploited by the street and family.
Good Luck and God Bless George
The Parque Central is the capital of all Granada activities!
If you walk one block north along the side of Remax (ie. the real estate company) to the bank (ie. BAC) at night, on Saturday night, you will see two (2) corners of street prostitutes working. Total number approaching ten (10.)
They couldn't take their eyes off of me, Meat Loaf, when I entered the bank to retrieve some reales (ie. cash.)
I don't know how much they charge sucker a*s Gringos (ie. You.) I don't know how much they charge a local (ie. Meat Loaf.) I will ask at my next opportunity.
Parque Central, dos cuadras arriba. (1 block arriba from BAC.)
(You can tell I'm from Managua 'cause although Granada has street names for every street, I still use Managua style directions.)
Semi-outdoor / semi-indoor disco. Live music and live disc jockey.
The crowd was mostly (ie. 60%) white tourists while the others being Nicaraguans.
The music was 100% Spanish.
The Gringas love Salsa and were dancing up a storm. One local, self appointed salsero, had a fila (ie. line) of Gringas waiting to dance with him. I, Meat Loaf, am the Gran Salsero with over twenty (20) years of salsa knowledge and conga skills (ie. soy un conguero.) I haven't performed vertical dancing in a while and will need to regain my 8-steps or clave: For at least three (3) years I've been only dancing horizontally.
I noticed what the locals have described as being the typical Gringa. Gringa (ie. white girls from North America) don't want a respectable Latino. They have respectable Latinos in their hometowns working at restaurants, construction, and gardening. They want a vagobundo (ie. bum). The same mentality that has Gringas chasing looser a*s Black guys (ie. thugs) in the USA is the same mentality they use when overseas. They don't want someone respectable, but someone that aint about sh*t. They want someone that you (ie. the White father) will absolutely dread being a member of the family. Of course, if she brought me home you and I would become best friends, play golf together at Seaside Mariana http://www.seasidemariana.com/, and sneek out to chase to tail (ie.monger). Some of my best friends are white: LOL.
They were all over the loosers. The only respectable Latinos they shared conversation with were taxi drivers and bar tenders.
I did witness a Gringo talking to a trannie in the dark entryway. They never re-entered the club. Switch Hitter.
This is a new club in Granada and okay for chasing Gringa Vicho (ie. p*ssy).
Only one (1) Gringo Viejo (ie. You) was in the club. Three (3) Gringo middle-age couples entered for about thirty-minutes.
Honestly, I haven't see too many white people for the past ten (10) years and forgot how it is to watch them (ie. You) dance. I even heard that "Who-hoo." You know the shout that white people do when they party (ie. drink). I had memories of my 25-year life in the USA. It was pretty cool. After all, this is why I relocated to Granada- white people. LOL.
You can tell girls from North America versus Europe.
The last time and only time I've ever lived in a tourist town was when I attended university in New Orleans, USA. And I did score with some tourists during Mardi Gras.
If you're in Granada for night life, Club Nuit will be one of the places you visit. FACT. Will you get some p*ssy? Variable. Latinas exist. Gringas exist. Where do you exist?
Throughout Managua you will see drug addicts walking the street with a baby food jar in hand. Within the baby food jar is pega- industrial strength.
The odor of pega is strong! You know, based upon sight, who is walking and sniffing pega. In Nicaragua, there is no social constraints so when someone is sniffing pega on the bus, walking the streets sniffing pega, or sitting on the street curb sniffing pega nothing is said. Instead, everyone is thankful they don't approach them.
Pega is a popular drug used by many vagobundos.
Pega addiction is commenced as early as 8 years of age!
I remember stories from my father- not the Obama book- when he told me about USA glue sniffers during his youth in the 1940s and 1950s.
Pega is real: Pega is a real problem!
Year 2008, at the Galleria Movie Theatre, presented a movie called, "Cafe Chavalos." It is / was a documentary about Glue Sniffers (ie. pega / cemento).
It documents how 50,000 children (ie. under 18 years of age) are drug addicts.
Cafe Chavalos is a real location in Granada, two blocks norte from the Calzada (ie. Zoom Bar). Antes (ie. before) they were a youth project attempting to "clean" the "dope fiends." Now, they do the same but under a different format.
In Nicaragua, there is no shortage or lack of need for non-profits (IRS 501c) and every North American knowns one another for SURVIVAL.
On day 1, I realized / learned that Granada is expensive!
Why? They charge IVA (ie. sales tax of 15%). This is the standard tax rate for Latin America. I do not patronize any place that charges IVA, but in Granada everyone charges IVA including the panhandlers.
Even worse, the wait staff charges a 10% voluntary tip!
Wow, that's 25% above the price of everything you purchase. In Managua, wait staff tips (ie. propinas) do not exist. I frown upon someone wanting to get paid for their career. Hell, that's why we have brothels.
Granada is more expensive than Managua for most things! How much more expensive? IVA + propina.
Expect to spend C$ 500 for two when eating dinner and drinks. Compared to Managua and Carne Asada for two valued at C $60 this is expensive! And they charge propina and IVA. This is why the bill approaches US $25.
Hay Dios Mios.
The price of living amogst Gringos when ultramar (ie. overseas).
Nica Bound
05-11-09, 04:33
the meat loaf gives up 6, count them members, 6, that is six, new reports in just 2 hrs. and 14 minutes. got to be some sort of record ! and does this guy have wireless satellite tattooed into the top of his gorro ? or a high speed internet hookup at the best park side bench in granada parque central ? and when will he give us something on topic, like maybe .......( international sex guide ) ?
So in Parque Central y la Calzada there are a lot of "Rookie Prostitutes" walking the street. How do I know that they are rookies? By appearance. The professional street walkers have the wardrobe required for business while the rookies do not. Instead, the rookies wear the clothing that they SURVIVE with.
How it goes down: (1) Everyone is broke (ie. la falta de un peso). (2)The girls, usually teenagers and early twenties bombard the calzada with her friends. They usually hit the park and street in groups of 2 - 6. They are all trying to look sexy, but are "Hood Rats." (3) They walk the calzada sight seeing. They don't have any money to sit down at the expensive restaurants so all they do is walk back-and-forth from the park to the lake. (4) They (ie. the local girls) look out of place amongst the foreigners and successful Nicaraguan population.
If you approach the group of girls they will respond with conversation. They are eager to meet someone (ie. a caballo) to pull thier sleigh. Whether that sleigh is her and her friends for the evening or you donig mantener of her and her mom and her child(ren), it is eagerly offered.
They will provide you with the contact information. If you are a local it's easy pickings. Talk about the sex-employee job you provide in-house. Ask how much she wants to earn per month / week. (Read Meat Loaf Posts.)
There are a lot of professional street hookers and a lot of rookie street hookers. Spend a few hours at the outdoor cafes that line the Calzada and you will see who's for rent.
the meat loaf gives up 6, count them members, 6, that is six, new reports in just 2 hrs. and 14 minutes. got to be some sort of record ! and does this guy have wireless satellite tattooed into the top of his gorro ? or a high speed internet hookup at the best park side bench in granada parque central ? and when will he give us something on topic, like maybe .......( international sex guide ) ?
nica bound,
hi amigo. staying true to my "minimal clutter" mandate, i submit the following:
when will i stumble across you in your neck of the woods (ie. masaya, granada departamentos)?
i'm getting local and will begin venturing into los pueblos (ie. diriomo, masatepe, nindiri, jinotepe, masaya).
nica bound, provide me with some other locations to survey like the dina's #2. you were 100% correct on that place.
p.s. kathy's waffle house is always packed.
sincerely,
your protege
I was taught in USA high school to never bring sand to the beach!
Bringing Sand to the Beach = Don't take a girl to the party where nothing but girls exist! At the beach there is nothing but sand so why would you take sand to the beach. The sand you take to the beach will irrelevant.
So when I made this move to Granada I advertised the sex-employee job among my circuit. Many applications were received yet I went back to a good service provider, Loco Lady from year 2007.
Loco Lady and I always did have good commaraderie! Loco Lady and I experienced life / lies / deceit together Loco Lady and I have maintained contact for three (3) years and I, Meat Loaf, feel comfortable with her! Too bad she's the person she is.
I retrieved Loco Lady and she made the move with me last week.
I wanted to show / present Loco Lady a different view of life from the life she lives. I also wanted to "show off" and bask in the glory! Loco Lady has been with me at every Managua residence I maintained. Loco Lady is from poverty fighting to SURVIVE, but orgullo (ie. pride) and a lack of aspiration / vision keeps her in the world she SURVIVES.
(These Nicas don't have a clue! When I learn or am presented to someone that's in the position I aspire, I attempt / request the privledge of learning from them. This is how I'm acquired the position I maintain. In Nicaragua, they do not do such a thing. Instead, they attempt to ride the train through loafing (ie. lack of effort.))
It started out beautiful! The emotions we hold for each other was / is present. Granted, it is / was foolish on my part to develop such corazon (ie. human emotion) for her, but I did / do.
Meat Loaf Revealed: Never have I maintained a long-term (ie. 1-year plus) romantic relationship! I'm USA (ie. American) and everything is disposable (ie. desechable) including people / friends / relationships. Although I attempt to maintain long-term contact will all I interact, most are juvenile / not mature and let emotions deteriorate such a bridge of aide.
If any of my "fans" want to provide mentoring to Meat Loaf, please email me so I may become your appreciatvie Protege!
How many "friends" do you have? How many of those you claim are "friends" are actually associates / acquiantances / people? It's said that the average person has less than five (5) "friends."
Starting off the week I gave her the weekly salary although payday is every Friday. Honestly, I didn't want to be lonely while making the residential transition. I know / knew that it takes a few weeks to recruit new p*ssy of value and didn't want to be dry.
She's always been serious about her compensation although it's petty cash!
She always executes playto. She always thinks puta!
She made a statement of Saturday that she can make money at any time by selling her p*ssy. Hence, I abandoned her in Parque Central where the street wh*res play. She came back 1-hour later empty handed. She stated that she works brothels and not the street.
I'm not paying and living among the world's successful with someone not worthy! I've worked / developed the lifestyle I live and refuse to sponsor someone of less worth!
I'm returning to my personality of snobbery! And I'm proud to be a snob! I've earned that position in life through daily efforts, pain, tears, and risks!
We held a conversation about her "not cutting the mustard" and she confessed that she's a puta (ie. desechable.) She also revealed that I'm "alta nivel." And that we are on polar opposite levels. I knew this but wanted to "uplift her." I wanted more for her than she wanted for herself!
As I've detailed before, they (ie. Nicaraguans) never take advantage of "true / real opportunity." She could earn US $2,000 guaranteed via my corporation, but refuses to attempt such "easy" activity.
After a few evenings of fighting. After a few evenings of me wasting money on her. After witnessing her live her life of no substance, I wore tired.
She became illusioned into thinking that salary is paid before occupational duties are performed.
She knew that she was in the wrong league with Meat Loaf in Granada.
I knew I made a mistake bringing sand to the beach!
I gave her 50% of her week's salary, bus fare, gaseosa money, and a good luck hung that she refused to accept.
Ahorra, I can get busy! Meat Loaf in Nicaragua for a few months before I relocate for a few years to Brazil. (Dickhead: I too have a challenging time understanding Portuguese so I need to jump into the waters of Brazil to overcome this challenge. The exchange rate and bad global economy makes Copacabana Beach less expensive than Nicaragua!)
Fellas', never bring sand (ie. wives, girlfriends, females) to the beach!
Nica Bound
05-11-09, 22:34
Meat Loaf says " P.S. Kathy's Waffle House is always packed. "
Order me a # 19 and look over your left shoulder, I'm there.
We realize you have only been in Granada for a week; however we’re not talking to a sex tourist. You gather information quickly and walk the streets as a local.
We know you are not hanging out at Kathy's Waffle House. By now you know where at least where 75% of the action is if not more. How corrupted are the nicas by all the tourists? Let’s talk turkey.
Xdred
Like Xdred, I'm a daytime person! I very rarely roll the streets at night! Why? That's when the dumb sh*t happens! Furthermore, your options are limited due to everyone respectable being sleep. Low volume music; less sl*ts walking the street; and an overall bad mix of night time vultures.
I realized on Day 2 that Granada was a night life city, if night life existed at all!
Monday, May 11, 2009, was boring as hell during the daytime (ie. noon) and night time (ie. midnight).
The calzada gets boring real early and real quick!
If you come to Granada, it's at night on the weekends.
The hookers start selling p*ssy in the park and at BAC as early as night falls!
They quote US $40 off the cuff and are looking for dumb a*s Gringos (ie. You) to pay.
Risk: Disease and robbery!
We realize you have only been in Granada for a week; however we’re not talking to a sex tourist. You gather information quickly and walk the streets as a local.
We know you are not hanging out at Kathy's Waffle House. By now you know where at least where 75% of the action is if not more. How corrupted are the nicas by all the tourists? Let’s talk turkey.
Xdred
I went to a neighborhood- get your a*s robbed, stabbed, and killed- brothel in the city of Masaya, Masaya, Nicaragua, Central America, and it was horrible! I had visions of my years in Mexico and the wh*res who sell p*ssy with clamidia as a regalo!
If you are an obvious tourist (ie. white person) this location is not the place to be! You can enter, but leaving will be a challenge! The street is 100% gravel, dirt, and Zamoza stones. Across the street is a pool hall with nothing but loosers looking to win (ie. rob your tourist a*s.) Lining the entire street are homes with nothing but unemployed persons sitting on the curb. This is not the place to be / go / explore and I, Meat Loaf, will not visit this dive again!
In all of my years of mongering since age 16, this is the worse place I have ever patronized! And that includes all of my years in Mexico where girls wash the cunts with a bottle of seltzer water after the session.
The bathroom is a hole in the ground at the rear of the establishment which is 70% indoor and 30% outdoor.
Four raggedy hookers were working. I invited the chela to my table. She had chipped finger nail polish so I invited her to leave! They had some chaparita (ie. short / small girl). They had a big tittie morena. The best looking girl was the juke box porno videos. About ten (10) local guys were present.
The police entered with their AK-47 rifles and drank a gaseosa.
The hookers live there tambien. I was scared to even view the mattress.
Price of p*ssy: C$ 120 per polvo.
¡A la puta!
We realize you have only been in Granada for a week; however we’re not talking to a sex tourist. You gather information quickly and walk the streets as a local.
We know you are not hanging out at Kathy's Waffle House. By now you know where at least where 75% of the action is if not more. How corrupted are the nicas by all the tourists? Let’s talk turkey.
Xdred
I'm not sure but I think this town is where you view some volcano. Nonetheless it is a sleepy, small town.
I walked the streets at dusk. Everyone noticed my non-resident status. I spit game to the local girls that I encountered.
At the park is where the action was going down: Soccer and girls talking while they watched their ninos.
Drank a beer at some restaurant lujoso. Got bored and left.
No action to be found and only a few businesses (ie. restaurants, cantinas) exist.
We realize you have only been in Granada for a week; however we’re not talking to a sex tourist. You gather information quickly and walk the streets as a local.
We know you are not hanging out at Kathy's Waffle House. By now you know where at least where 75% of the action is if not more. How corrupted are the nicas by all the tourists? Let’s talk turkey.
Xdred
Much thanks is given to the Mexican states of Durango y Chihuahua for teaching me how to get campesino (ie. farmer.)
Living on the land! Walking miles to visit your next door neighbor! Existing in what is often called, "Butt F*ck Egypt (ie. the middle of nowhere.)
I walked the street called Diriomo and talked with the populace. Looking for some chavalas they were present doing what is done in Nicaragua- Loitering.
Visible were lots of machetes which is the staple for existence!
I wanted to visit these pueblos so that I could understand where the girls I f*ck are from.
The climate is fresca (ie. cool.) The beauty of nature is present. It's 100% rural. Buses ira y vuelta (ie. roundtrip) which gives the people access to the larger cities for C$10.
In this town you must pull-up a chair with the locals at their house / finca / quinta / ranch and work 100% friendship network.
I was taught in USA high school to never bring sand to the beach!
Bringing Sand to the Beach = Don't take a girl to the party where nothing but girls exist! At the beach there is nothing but sand so why would you take sand to the beach. The sand you take to the beach will irrelevant.
So when I made this move to Granada I advertised the sex-employee job among my circuit. Many applications were received yet I went back to a good service provider, Loco Lady from year 2007.
Loco Lady and I always did have good commaraderie! Loco Lady and I experienced life / lies / deceit together Loco Lady and I have maintained contact for three (3) years and I, Meat Loaf, feel comfortable with her! Too bad she's the person she is.
I retrieved Loco Lady and she made the move with me last week.
I wanted to show / present Loco Lady a different view of life from the life she lives. I also wanted to "show off" and bask in the glory! Loco Lady has been with me at every Managua residence I maintained. Loco Lady is from poverty fighting to SURVIVE, but orgullo (ie. pride) and a lack of aspiration / vision keeps her in the world she SURVIVES.
(These Nicas don't have a clue! When I learn or am presented to someone that's in the position I aspire, I attempt / request the privledge of learning from them. This is how I'm acquired the position I maintain. In Nicaragua, they do not do such a thing. Instead, they attempt to ride the train through loafing (ie. lack of effort.))
It started out beautiful! The emotions we hold for each other was / is present. Granted, it is / was foolish on my part to develop such corazon (ie. human emotion) for her, but I did / do.
Meat Loaf Revealed: Never have I maintained a long-term (ie. 1-year plus) romantic relationship! I'm USA (ie. American) and everything is disposable (ie. desechable) including people / friends / relationships. Although I attempt to maintain long-term contact will all I interact, most are juvenile / not mature and let emotions deteriorate such a bridge of aide.
If any of my "fans" want to provide mentoring to Meat Loaf, please email me so I may become your appreciatvie Protege!
How many "friends" do you have? How many of those you claim are "friends" are actually associates / acquiantances / people? It's said that the average person has less than five (5) "friends."
Starting off the week I gave her the weekly salary although payday is every Friday. Honestly, I didn't want to be lonely while making the residential transition. I know / knew that it takes a few weeks to recruit new p*ssy of value and didn't want to be dry.
She's always been serious about her compensation although it's petty cash!
She always executes playto. She always thinks puta!
She made a statement of Saturday that she can make money at any time by selling her p*ssy. Hence, I abandoned her in Parque Central where the street wh*res play. She came back 1-hour later empty handed. She stated that she works brothels and not the street.
I'm not paying and living among the world's successful with someone not worthy! I've worked / developed the lifestyle I live and refuse to sponsor someone of less worth!
I'm returning to my personality of snobbery! And I'm proud to be a snob! I've earned that position in life through daily efforts, pain, tears, and risks!
We held a conversation about her "not cutting the mustard" and she confessed that she's a puta (ie. desechable.) She also revealed that I'm "alta nivel." And that we are on polar opposite levels. I knew this but wanted to "uplift her." I wanted more for her than she wanted for herself!
As I've detailed before, they (ie. Nicaraguans) never take advantage of "true / real opportunity." She could earn US $2,000 guaranteed via my corporation, but refuses to attempt such "easy" activity.
After a few evenings of fighting. After a few evenings of me wasting money on her. After witnessing her live her life of no substance, I wore tired.
She became illusioned into thinking that salary is paid before occupational duties are performed.
She knew that she was in the wrong league with Meat Loaf in Granada.
I knew I made a mistake bringing sand to the beach!
I gave her 50% of her week's salary, bus fare, gaseosa money, and a good luck hung that she refused to accept.
Ahorra, I can get busy! Meat Loaf in Nicaragua for a few months before I relocate for a few years to Brazil. (Dickhead: I too have a challenging time understanding Portuguese so I need to jump into the waters of Brazil to overcome this challenge. The exchange rate and bad global economy makes Copacabana Beach less expensive than Nicaragua!)
Fellas', never bring sand (ie. wives, girlfriends, females) to the beach!
Excellent report…I too would have brought sand to the beach for a few days until my feet got wet. Insurance policy or Hedge.
Xdred
You guys know that I'm a salesman, correct? I sold you and now you can't live one day without reading Meat Loaf posts, correct? A.B.C. (ie. Always Be Closing.) Glenn Gary Glenn Ross. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3C2l7o-6qg
I like cities that are daytime!
I like spitting game on the street / subway / bus / traffic light / stores / any place where there is traffic. As in profession, I solicit.
In the big cities of Chicago, New York, Monterrey, Cd. Mexico, Cd. Panama, Cali, and Granada, I attempt to obtain five (5) phone numbers of females to potentially f*ck! As I tell them, "we can't f*ck on the phone so I need your address too."
In Granada a male can talk to females all day long via the street. Visit the mercado and "spit game." A male, Meat Loaf, can acquire 5 numbers per day with 3 addresses in Granada. Can you? Only effort will reveal the results.
Granada is a city, unlike Managua, where you can build / recruit on the street!
Granada is 0% action lunes a jueves! If there is action it's at rush hour in the commercial district. If there is night action it's on the calzada. Granada is 0% action lunes a jueves!
Since you cannot wait until Friday, Saturday, and Sunday to recruit you must execute targeted daytime action!
Take 1-hour per day, preferably at rush hour, and hit the street talking to every girl you encounter. If you execute this technique you will acquire the 5-3. If not, you will be waiting for the weekend with the weekday being spent by yourself (ie. personal time.)
I maintain staff (ie. domestic help.) It's beneath me to grocery shop. It's beneath me to cook my own meals. This is the USA lifestyle and I'm not in Latin America to perform chores / menial labour. This domestic activity is a job for 90% of all Chicas Nicas and they need to SURVIVE. Hence, I employ them in what they know- domestica. (Everyone knows that domestica = putear.)
What is putear? Sound the word out!
In three years of Managua residence I never truly went grocery shopping (ie. Albertsons, Jewel, Dominicks, Piggly Wiggly, Kroger, HEB, Pathway.) I did in Granada 'cause now I have a USA-style kitchen with toys.
With a plethora / over-abundance of Europeans and North Americans this grocery store stocks familiar food to those from this region of the world. It is / was a nice memory to see familiar foods. Foods such as:
Pasta (more than 1 type; angel hair, lasagna, ravioli, etcetera)
Rice (more than white rice; brown, Spanish)
Cheese (motzarella, swiss, provolone, monterrey jack, cheddar)
Cereal (rice krispies, corn flakes, fruit loops, Honey Bunches of Oates)
Tortillas
Vegetables (jalepeno peppers. red peppers, cilantro, split peas)
It was a nice change of pace from the puperrias of Managua and their staples of Beef, Chicken, Rice, Beans, Yuca, and Cabbage!
It fealt good to be a Gringo as I described the different cooking techniques of al norte to my house guest.
P.S. We are truly blessed in the food arena: Those Midwest USA grains feed the world.
P.S. These Latin Americans can get foolish often. With the "Swine Flu" sweaping the world; Nicas being Super Delicate in their "concern" for health, especially el nino; and wanting to present "lujo" in commercial enterprises they had / have their cashiers wearing painter's mask to simulate health workers. They look ridiculous! The masks are paper and if they're scared to be around the food, why would I purchase it?
In Granada there are only two (2) grocery stores: Pali (ie. Walmart franchise) and la Colonia. Everyone must purchase their food (ie. meats) from one of the above. So as in the USA, you can meat lots of females by attending the grocerys store. Since they too (ie. Granada Nicas) are hungry, have ninos and a mom to support with a household full of family members, simply advertising your basket complete with food of luxury will attract las chochas.
In la Colonia it's a "Caballo Show." Pull the carriage Gringo / European, pull the carriage. As I walked the isles in search of my provisiones (ie. groceries) it was extremely obvious who the caballos were.
30, 40, and 50-year Blancos escorted by younger Latinas (ie. Granadinas) and her kids, and her mother! The caballo always looked to be fulfilling his role (ie. mantener) while the Nicas enjoyed their reins (ie. leach.)
When checkout happened he is / was the one digging into the bolsillo (ie. pocket) while they (ie. Nicas) were happy for the two-week mantener.
At the supermercado in Granada you will see your future (ie. caballo.)
These Granadinas can switch (ie. shake that a*s!)
¡Hay Dios Mio!
They also present what I want to see in the air- legs. Daisy Dukes for Days is a Meat Loaf estimate of 20%. That is to say 20% of the Granadinas wear shorts that resemble Victoria Secrets.
You will have a hard time desiphering (mispelled) who is dieciocho anos! Me too. But unlike you (ie. Gringo,) I do not attempt to relive my youth by pursuing youth. I play, not prey, the deck that is dealt; master the cards within the deck; and utilize a lot of Jokers. Nonetheless, these Granadinas know that this is an international city of 140,000 proper with 800,000 tourists annually to Nicaragua. Most all these visitors pass through Granada at some point, I did!
Shake that a*s on my block; at the taxi stand; in la Colonia; and everywhere else with a 20% chance. It's a night city, after 4 p.m., if night action exists (ie. park, last resort; tourist trap.) You must build your stable (ie. in-house stock of Chicas Nicas) when play time begins (ie. Thursday,. Friday, Saturday, Sunday; after 4 p.m. daily - 8:30 p.m. inner-city and departamentos.)
As Xdred says, "You will like the p*ssy!" Can you afford it / pay for it / SURVIVE to get it? That's the issues, lurker.
Like Managua you're carne blanca para hacer carne molida! The tourist is to whom I refer. Criminals have motorcycles, taxi cabs, and buses: Criminals can drive to the "Show of Prey (ie. calzada, parque, and everywhere else.)
Of course, one will want to think of themselves as being safe, but that is simply a thought. Street skills are required to navigate the street. Spanish skills too! Again, you can choose a different route to learn the city at its most basic level (ie. the street) or you can go directly to alta nivel (ie. high society) without ever knowing / learning how to play the game with 100% of the population. You must decide how you want to ATTEMPT to play Granada just as those before you (ie. the French, the Dutch, the Spaniards, the USA, William Walker, and Meat Loaf.)
Come to the party! The entry fee is inexpensivel the glory is great, and the RISK IS REAL. Look at those before you since 1524. And that was during the African Slavery Trade / Aparthied to the American Hemisphere (ie. 1492 - 1965.)
I recommed one go to Managua to learn the game before Granada. Granada is too small. The same pass-through traffic exists for both: Pass-through traffic of foreigners in Granada and Nicaraguense in Managua. Either way, come to Nicaragua.
Nica Bound
05-15-09, 04:46
He has done it again ! Another personal best as ML scores five (5) brand new reports in only 1 hour 10 minutes ! Unbelieveable ! Imagine what he could produce if he abandons SpellChecker ! Oh wait a sec....he never uses...
He has done it again ! Another personal best as ML scores five (5) brand new reports in only 1 hour 10 minutes ! Unbelieveable ! Imagine what he could produce if he abandons SpellChecker ! Oh wait a sec....he never uses...
Hey Buddy,
I never understand if your posts concerning my volume of postings is (1) sarcastics or (2) agitation?
I simply have a lot of information to share so others can win! I'm already gaining "fans" in the "Colonial City."
Bez Bezarra
05-15-09, 14:01
I went to a neighborhood- get your a*s robbed, stabbed, and killed- brothel in the city of Masaya, Masaya, Nicaragua, Central America, and it was horrible! I had visions of my years in Mexico and the wh*res who sell p*ssy with clamidia as a regalo!
If you are an obvious tourist (ie. white person) this location is not the place to be! You can enter, but leaving will be a challenge! The street is 100% gravel, dirt, and Zamoza stones. Across the street is a pool hall with nothing but loosers looking to win (ie. rob your tourist a*s.) Lining the entire street are homes with nothing but unemployed persons sitting on the curb. This is not the place to be / go / explore and I, Meat Loaf, will not visit this dive again!
In all of my years of mongering since age 16, this is the worse place I have ever patronized! And that includes all of my years in Mexico where girls wash the cunts with a bottle of seltzer water after the session.
The bathroom is a hole in the ground at the rear of the establishment which is 70% indoor and 30% outdoor.
Four raggedy hookers were working. I invited the chela to my table. She had chipped finger nail polish so I invited her to leave! They had some chaparita (ie. short / small girl). They had a big tittie morena. The best looking girl was the juke box porno videos. About ten (10) local guys were present.
The police entered with their AK-47 rifles and drank a gaseosa.
The hookers live there tambien. I was scared to even view the mattress.
Price of p*ssy: C$ 120 per polvo.
¡A la puta!
Mucho gusto, Cabron !!
I've just read a largo page of your finas thread and I am quite impressed with your viewpoints style and machismo outlook for life and the putas. Que la vida!!
I grew up in Miami and lived always in SoFla, so I know the Nicas, though it has not yet been my destination, as though I could speak always some espanol, in the last ten years I've only been to russian countries and learned to speak it, so sadly when I found a gorgeous young Honduran chica here 5 years ago and took her out, I practically went crazy speaking half russian and half spanish. She was extrema caliente with the cutest face, pocito perfecto culo and big tetas, but my spanish was not enough for her, and she returned home to marry. As likely, she got kicked out when immigration found she tried to work under her sister's green card and SS#.
As much as I offered to support her, perhaps her pride got in the way, so she skiddadled back to La Cieba. Oh well.
While I have dabbled surfing in Costa Rica and Brasil, those were before my FT foreign mongering exploits, and after that I decided to really go native and went all the way to Indonesia and nver looked back after that to this western hemisphere. Even though I do love the latinas here in Miami, I just never got the taste for them, after disappointments in Santo Domingo and Puerto Plata, but I did want to recall one of my most interesting brothel field trips to Tres y Media, that your above quoted post made me think about.
You mentioned mongering in Mexico, and many moons ago in the 1980's, my first ever brothel experience was there on a dive trip to Cozumel, the taxito took us to what looked like a barn, but instead of horses in the stalls, there were horrid old ugly wh0res that if we had the choice, I think i would've rather fucked one of the horses!! When we explained again to the driver, that we really insisted on a nice younger girl, he finally told us the very best girls will ONLY be found at Cantina Tres y Media, simply known for how many miles down a dusty dirt road away from the city, but it would take 15 or 20 minutes, so we said sure ok, let's go. We drove to what seemed like the very end of the island, nothing in sight anywhere, to a very lonely sad spot.
My cubano amigo wingman with me to act as interpreter, though born in East Orange, was at my side to give me confidencio, walked in behind me. Naturally we were el solo gringos, and all the locales stared us down so I thought, Holy Shit, what have we walked into here, they look like they want to cut our throats... All my friend Cesar could do to make me feel better, was mutter in my ear, "We're gonna die!" Everything about this place was exactly as you mentioned above, the worst possible everything.
We sat down at an empty table, ordered two cervesas, and the locals went back to their business ignoring us, Gracias Dio!! A scene right out of a nightmare movie. After some eye contact with a fat ugly old bar wh0re, she came over and we began explaining that we came out to find only the very best cleanest sweetest youngest skinniest newest girl possible, if there was such a girl, and only if she would agree to come back to our hotel, and that we'd pay well. Because the thought of staying there to fuck her, even another minute seemed utterly suicidal for us.
She finally brought a sweet thing back out from one of the back rooms, probably that had been already sitting with one of the local boys drinking, gave us the price, we agreed, and all I wanted to do was get the hell out of there with her as fast as possible, but when I looked outside, the taxi that had brought us there that we told, 'DON"T LEAVE!!! WE"LL BE OUT IN 10 MINUTES TO GO BACK TO TOWN'', he was naturalmente long gone!
So they had to call for another taxi, and we did the wait 'in shame' at the door for 15 minutes with our chica, getting some nasty stares again from the locales. Finally the taxi came, and that 15 minute ride back was filled with thougts of getting hijacked and killed, since we were required to show the mamacita at the tavern that we did have $140 cash to give to the chica when we would arrive back at our hotel.
Somehow we were not followed or bothered, and the taxi wished us Muchos Buenos Noches at the hotel. I insisted to my friend, who was at best a novice at mongering, that I demanded the chica primera, so I got to taste her sweet little culo and papaya undisturbed for a good 70 minutos, while Cesar sat on the terrace drinking cervesas and awaiting his turn, and finally bitching at me to hurry up. I resented that a bit, so after I switched places with him, two other fellas that we had met on the dive boat that were staying down the hall from us came by, and I said, Hey, ya wanna see something interesting?? They said yeah sure, so from the balcony, I quickly swung opened up the unlocked shutters to reveal Cesar's bare ass up in the air as he was doing the chica, who screamed some obscenities at us all for a good laugh.
Thanks for the compliments. Fantasy or Fiction, you decide?
You get what you pay for!
Three (3) sloppy, aging poorly, and sucia (ie. dirty) wh*res (ie. mothers) were working. This location is 100% trabajores (ie. construction workers) and 100% locals. Any obvious foreigner (ie. white person) would be out of your place! I stood out, but on a more friendly basis. La Costa (ie. Bluefields, Corn Island, Puerto Cabeza.)
This place sucks!
Will I return? Hell no!
Granada is not the town for brothels: Granada is the town to socialize amongst international visitors / tourists. For local girls you must build something. You must attract locals to your world.
I toured the other brothel which was vacant at 1500 hours on the Saturday after payday. Go figure!
A ISG local who knew / knows who I am from the street informed me that he rented som "Parque Central" vicho (ie. pussy) for C $60.
Granada has pretty girls that will hold a conversation with you on the street.
Managua has a brothel on every three (3) blocks where the girl(s) will hold a conversation with you and f*ck you for C$ 150.
Which is better?
The day after payday and it was / is boring!
You must build you network 'cause there is nothing readily available to attack!
It takes a few weeks to get the wheels turning and thus far only a few prospects are maturing.
Granada is a city where you either need to (1) focus on your occupational endeavors during the daytime or (2) explore nature and tourist sites. This is not the city for daytime action! I'm a daytime guy: Managua is the city for 24 / 7 party!
You must build your comfort zone / world to SURVIVE Granada! It is not "ready-made" like Managua and even then you need to prospect for three (3) days!
There are not cantinas (ie. bars) on every block like most poverish cities / countries although the citizens are poor. Only we foreigners are wealthy, more of less.
In Granada, you need to bring sand to the beach, but be ready to discard it (ie. female friends / guests / free-loaders with no serious romantic relationship.)
Suggestion: (1) Hire a sex-employee from Managua; (2) import her to Granada; (3) socialize with her, using her as advertisement; and (4) look for other girls to meet / befriend without her, the sex-employee being celosa (ie. jealous); and (5) give her or not the freedom to "fleece" a Gringo while socializing with you.
Otherwise, you will be dry in Granada! You must build and how long will that take?
Meat Loaf says " P.S. Kathy's Waffle House is always packed. "
Order me a # 19 and look over your left shoulder, I'm there.
#16 was too much for me to eat! Pecan pancakes the entire size of the plate, scrambled eggs with onions, tomatoes, sausage, and salsa accompanies by a 12-once coffee. Vale: C$ 100 which is too "rich" for the locals and was 100% Gringo.
Get to this Granada landmark early for a good seat shielded by rays of the morning sunrise.
Next time I will follow the advice of "Nica Bound" and order the #19 (ie. omlette.)
Many times in literature the difference between reality and fantasy are vivid. In other times it is fused.
I never knew the power of my words until today!
I do apologize to those that desire I stop writing such fiction! I will stop writing: This post will be my last post.
A gentleman suggested that I choose a different forumn to write. And he was / is correct. I will choose to write in the area of "true contribution" to la sociedad.
After this gentleman's suggestion, a 'friend" stated more truth to me which was / is the reality.
And still a third presented themselves before my eyes and in my comfort zone. That person accomplished their results! I realize my bullsh*t is too powerful; too detailed; and too believable. You truly know who I am as witnessed before your eyes.
I, Meat Loaf, have been writing about fantasy and not reality! I have been exposed. The stories I write are merged with truth, fantasy, and fary tales.
Hopefully during these fused times I have not "pissed" anyone off that warrents revenge. For I never simply formed words together.
Sabes (ie. You know,) I thought and was introduced to the power of prose / text with these postings. I know that my writing skills are more advanced than others and found it a joy to take a reprieve from my "computer-based" job of writing contracts, marketing, etcetera, and write some entertainment.
Entertainment should never be achieved at the sake of criminal activity. Writing about "brainstormed" ideas of granduer is what ISG is / was for me. I do / did everything possible as to leave a benefit wherever I am. I strive to be a "postive contributor" in every society, especially those where I am a tourist.
To understand what Meat Loaf wrote about one must read every post in totallity. Categorize those posts that were offensive on one side, and those that were positive on the other. Combining all posts will give you an idea, in-depth, of expat / foreign residence. It attempted to cover or think about all angles of "the game."
As stated before, "SURVIVAL in Nicaragua" will come to your door!
Truth be Told: (1) I had to change the theme because many believed what was written. (2) I wrote about crime and street activity and those tones of oppression as to educate / inform you of the life-experience of others. (3) This topic grew into a topic / idea of "Granduer." (4) This idea of "Grandeur" became / gave spark to my prior-life of medicrity! It became fantasy- 1000%.
I always attempted to guide those that may detour into violations of mandate to steer clear of such. I never disparaged (mispelled) anyone by always using alias names and fantasy experiences. I always attempted to entertain / not collude / educate for the upliftment of society with the understanding of society. I attempted to fuse all without any area being void or neglected.
When a tourist / guest in another person's country you cannot do anything abstract from their culture. For this may be seen as an opporuntity to exploit / enforce / manipulate the foreigner.
Those that SURVIVE Latin America do so because they have no other option!
It truly takes a rare or sponsored breed to endure. Let's face it, You Never Get Far From Where You Were Born.
Fellas', you will have experiences in foreign countries that will scare you sh*tless! You will be wishing you were back at home in the domestic country eating the bullshit / crow they present you. You never know who they are, but everyone knows who you are (ie. the foreigner; loud mouth.)
It are these crossing points that "check" your desire for expat status! It are these crossing points where it becomes 100% local vs. the foreigner. This is when only transparency will save you! This is when the difference in legal systems (ie. Roman vs. Civil) will be learned. One system is (a) guilty until proven innocent and the other is (b) innocent until proven guilty.
I, Meat Loaf, talk / type a lot! I have this desire to always talk. I study a lot and read lots of books so that I will have product knowledge. Everything I learn and become educated upon is for future reference. With my ability to write and speak, it become recognized and not just chatter.
I respect all I encounter! I am grateful and attempt to lend a helping hand!
I've always encouraged and recommended everyone to operate in a transparent way. I like that term and idea. Far too often and to their detriment those that don't get eaten-up. And the comida (ie. food) is more juicy when foreigner or imported. Unfortunately for the imported food they do not know the cooking methods of the new domestic country.
These stories used some personal information, a lot of fantasy, a trace of truth, and hopefully nothing of detriment to anyone!
Truth be Told: I'm nothing more than a lot of puffery, fantasy, and visions of granduer! I'm a salesman and telling a good story is valuable through its entertainment value.
A friend of mine relvealed / suggested that I take my writing skills exhibited on this board to another forumn where I can actually help grow / develop this country, Nicaragua, into a more powerful place for its residents. This is my calling and desire in life to contribute to society. I have been blessed during my stay / life in Nicaragua. Hopefully, I didn't deteriorate or talk / write bad about Nicaragua. This country is a great country for those that want to contribute! And I do. Nicaragua is my favorite country of six (6) countries formerly-resided.
Someone that knows me suggested I stop this fictional myth called Meat Loaf if I am to SURVIVE. I choose to SURVIVE!
The power of the internet is REAL! Cyberspace vs. the Reality? The words and actions posted on the internet are ever-lasting. The repretation is ever-lasting and accessible. I know that one day, if not today, these postings will be associated with me in the person (ie. Real Life,) which is why I attempted to expand the topic of discourse into those of empowerment for all. It really became a journal of newly acquired information, sexual fantasy, and writing practice. I knew that my posting would become personally identifyable which is why they gained strength in words.
I simply suggest / request that those who identify these words to my person don't apprach with bias, but void predjudice as I do / have / will do.
I'm honored to be a guest in Nicaragua; being welcomed into Nicaragua; and attempting to find my way through the society. After all, I love this country and chose it as a place where I, the average man, can contribute. Others suggest I go back to the USA. I sure would like to stay in Nicaragua
"Fans," I'm an intenet professional with a lot of free-time. This is evident by how many stories I was able to create / write. I found this to be a place / any place to educate you on what I've learned over time. My prose will be / is more valuable than this forumn and the "dark cloud" presented over certain members of the populace.
As Hollywood does, I did: Sell the public what they want to consume, in a legal manner.
Again, I apologize for those I may have offended or who feel my writings are detrimental to our overall view / objective for Nicaragua. I would be and am grateful for the kind arms and citizens who embraced me.
This will be / is my last post! I have deleted this account! I understand and recognize my role! And thank you (ie. that person(s)) for taking the time to inform me of goings-on and other goings.
God Bless You and Me
Meat Loaf.
Dancehall King "Sizzla" says it all in "Solid as a Rock!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCWawwIiA1I
Chivatas (ie. soverign snitches,) chismosos (ie. gossipers,) and "cock blocks" attempted to stop me, and did for a while (ie. Meat Loaf "Final Post.")
Or was it a rouse? Quien sabes, but sitting directly across from me at the executive desk was where it went down (ie. extortion and intimidation via jurisprudence.)
As in the USA, legal action is perpetuated against the ignorant and defenseless! Ultrama (ie. overseas) it is worse due to language, custom, and lack of legal knowledge. This is why retaining a legal team upon arrival is mandatory.
I enjoy writing on ISG and accept the "negative association" of such postings. Don't knock me 'cause I'm getting p*ssy and you have chosen manogomy. That's your choice. And the choice of many chavalas is Meat Loaf. Don't hate, Congratulate!
Let's summarize this episode and previous posts with a good listening to Sizzla!
Let's get back to work! And remember Meat Loaf posts are written in Real Time for maximum effect / reality! No other person brings their readership into the condom, into the streets, and into the society as does Meat Loaf through his "Real Time Postings."
Week #2 delivered my first piece of "Granadina Guts!"
As discussed in earlier posts, a traveler or new resident must hit the streets and begin their quest in building romantic relationships, friends, allies, and local knowledge. I, Meat Loaf, have jumped deep into the Granada streets building my fame and mystique. It didn't take long for me to collect a few dividends.
So, my Granada employee (ie. drinking companion on salary) attacked the cantinas throughout the city and I found one chavala looking for some turca. For the following three or four days we quenched our thirst at her locale. During these visits we agreed to meet and f*ck at my home on her dias de descancar (ie. days off from work.)
On the street, I saw her friend and he informed me that she missed me 'cause after those four (4) days of daily visits, I stopped visiting her. Why? She has zero (0%) conversation.
At another cantina, I was introduced to her "sister." Her hermana told me about how her sister talks about me with a passion inside the home. Why can't she perform the same verbal talents to me in person?
It turned out that her "sister" wanted to compete for Meat Loaf! The two "sisters" had a competition on who will f*ck Meat Loaf first.
In Nicaragua, as verified by XDred, the chavalas compete for their / a man. And when you're Meat Loaf, it begins to resemble NCAA Final Four with 64 qualifiers.
So the girl called me one evening so she could make a house call. We met at the parque central, walked to my 2,100 sq. foot home with swimming pool, and I attempted to engage conversation. She wasn't having any and said that's her personality- mute.
In the pool we relaxed, desnudo (ie. butt naked.) I'm a man of action and if their is a piece of p*ssy within my home it is going to be poked! That goes for my office too! I remember living in Cd. Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico, and accepting the visit of an associate. She was a sexy 40-year old from D.F. Anyway, she came to collect payment and earned a litro of leche. She tried to runaway, but I took control by bringing her into my arms, kissing her, and rubbing Meat Loaf along her leg. Every woman wants / seeks / dreams of a "Clase Turca" and I'm here to turn fantasy into reality.
Anyway, while in the pool her only concern was if I f*cked her "sister" or not. That was our conversation. I told her, "no, not yet!" I gave her a few pounds of carne within the pool in the positions of missionary and doggy style. We then adjourned to the bed where I layed some more pipe. Bored, disinterested, and performing a community service were my activities.
In the sale (ie. living room) she ate a few pounds of tube steak. She was so hungry that the 14-foot colonial doors were not closed, but open for all to witness her appetite. I knew she was d*ck sucker based upon our first introduction and that was her main interest- sucking d*ck and f*cking me before her "sister."
She earned her batdio (ie. milk shake) and caught a taxi home. At the14-foot colonial doorway wer waited for her taxi. I've lived so long in Managua that I felt this urge / need to reach into my bolsillo (ie. pockets) and give her C$150, but I Did Not! I stayed strong: I waited for her to solicit, but she did not. Is this Granada? No transfer of payment upon transfer of bodily fluids? If so, I don't know if I like this atmosphere.
Why wouldn't a guy like not paying for p*ssy? 'Cause it takes away his position of power via finance. Instead, he must attract and retain the p*ssy via other traits. Many of you guys are addicts traveling the world to purchase p*ssy behind the backs of your wives. Why?
Anyway, I was happy and pleased to not provide her any money. Her "sister" saw me last week and knew about her "sister's" visit to the darkside.
All in all, it was "Someone to Do" and break the 1-week drought I was experiencing. I placed her on the d*ck sucker rotation.
Point of the story: Competition is a good thing! She wanted nothing more than to beat her "sister" and f*cking me. She wasn't interested in conversation nor financial compensation, but "bragging rights" over her sister. She accomplished her mission and now they both have a memory to share for remainer of thier lives.
let me see it: come on now, let me see it!
everyone wants to see "the real thing," ambos (ie. both) male and female. or at least they want to see if the myth is reality.
yesterday, i was present in el hipico (ie. horse parade) tomado (ie. drinking) tona. the cans of beer were running through my system and the system of my female counterpart (ie. my "bottom" b*tch; my #1 female.) therefore, we went inside one of the many restaurants that lines la calzada to relieve our bladders.
before the urinal and with a stance wider than ex-senator larry craig of utah, i released what resembles a "fireman's hose." reading the advertisement that stands above the urinal was my focus. female voices to my rear was the distraction.
with confidence; with missegination lusts; and with two (2) sets of eyeballs they attempted to enter my stall and bear witness to este turca (ie. this d*ck.) being the gentleman you have come to respect, i politely requested that the girls remain outside the stall.
in this location the male urinal is protected by a swinging saloon-type door where vistas (ie. views) are held above and below the door. hence, the girls were capable of sneeking a peek above the door while i drained the python. again, i politiely requested that the intoxicated girls remain outside the stall.
with camera in hand, like drdewman, the girls requested a photo of este turca! when was the last time female strangers requested a photo of your d*ck? when was the last time anyone requested a photo of your d*ck?
for "me loaf" this is common occurrence!
i drained the schlong and exited the urinal. que grosera son las mujeres (ie. how rude woman are.)
attempting to open my zipper they attacked! attempting to grab "el regalo de dios" (ie. gift from god) they attacked! attempting to work the camera for a face shot and shaft shot they manuevered. que grosera son las mujeres.
as the dos chamacas (ie. girls) waited for my "bottom b*tch" to exit the female "pisser," they continued their request to see my d*ck. the entire conversation / sexual harrassment was heard by my "bottom b*tch."
experience has taught "me loaf" to remain cool, calm, and collected when these requests are made of me. pues, i continued stating that "soy un caballero timido" (ie. i'm a shy gentleman.) after repeating this three or four times my "bb" (ie. bottom b*tch) exited and oversaw the episode from the lavandero (ie. sink.)
i asked the girl, who was 100% dedicated on taking a photo of my d*ck, if she wanted the photo for her pillow. will she lay with my "d*ck shot" along her mejilla (ie. cheek?) her friend laughed as both mouths watered.
bien bola (ie. drunk) were the girls so i finally cancelled the sexual harrassment perpetrated upon a male by exiting the restaurant.
this was a great experience for my "bb" so she can have further evidence that this "clase turca" is in demand by 100% complete strangers. they wanted to eat this tube steak, but i held composure. since this episode, my "bb" and i have joked and laughed before and after orgasms.
¡clase turca: let me see it!
I was tired from busting three (3) polvos in my "BB." All I wanted to do for the evening was surf International Sex Guide photo galleries. Changing my plans was a phone call from a chavala. She arrived at my palacio 90-minutes later.
Watching canal 2, "Sin Senos no Hay Paraiso" (ie. Without titties there is no paradise) we shared brief conversation. Remember, she has no conversation and when she does speak her vernacular is too street.
I don't know exactly what happened, but I closed my two (2) sets of 14-fooot double doors for privacy. I then removed my shorts and shirt. Falling to my knees was "Meat Loaf." I paraded por un rato (ie. a little bit) so she could admire her meal. Hungry, she endulged!
I hate a b*tch that can't suck d*ck! I hate a br*ad that can't take instruction. And she is both.
Fast and faster. Salvaje y salvaje. Without rythym. Too much nail action. Too much huevo (ie. testicle) action. All in all, no vale verga (ie. good for nothing.) I attempted to make her meal more enjoyable with instructions, but she couldn't listen. Life Lesson: If someone tells you the formula for proven success, you should follow it (ie. Meat Loaf posts; Meat Loaf instructions on chupadas.)
Frustrated, I took control! Mentally I envisioned f*cking some other girl so I could maintain an erection. I positioned her mouth and face in a position similar to doggy style. I pounded her throat and most masturbate, long and strong. When her lechita (ie. ejaculation) was earned or awarded she drank it like a fish. Gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp, and one last gulp for the road!
Within minutes I dressed into my shorts and shirt and gently encouraged her to leave due to my need for sleep.
It was horrible and I hate f*cking rookies. Fact: Most p*ssy is horrible so a man must f*ck many to find a piece of p*ssy worth the effort and bullsh*t that accompanies male-female relations.
Old Gringos aged 55 - 80 reside in Granada and take pride in their motorcycles.
The Gringo community is small- less than a few hundred- and the Old Gringos ride around town with their motorcycles.
Harley Davidson, Honda, and other touring bikes are present. The Gringo motorcylce community is small- less than 20.
I don't know you, Mr Loaf. You may well have a python in your pants. You may well be capable of seven polvos on the trot.
Last Friday, I acquired "cabin fever" and wanted to hit the dangerous streets of Managua, but its distance muted such interest. Instead I was forced to explore the barrios of Granada.
While at one location the waiter, who experiences similar "Penis Envy" as does "Chinchuliar," showed my associate and I a photo of his turca (ie. dick.) He commented how I was not the only packing meat: Why this was a topic of conversation is unknown to me since he and I never discuss females. He pours my beer is the relationship we share.
* I like Chinchuliar, but this was too easy of a "rip" not to take advantage of the comparison. 100% jokes, Chinchuliar: No offense. *
At another location I met a "clucker" with more tattoos than Tommy Lee of Motley Crew. I invited the streetwalker for a beer. She witnessed Meat Loaf being rude and a loud mouth to children panhandlers. She learned of Meat Loaf employment. She became hungry and I invited her to my home to cook dinner.
At my home, after viewing her cedula, she completed my 10-page job application. I instructed her to return with (1) finger print cards, (2) police record, and (3) cedula to commence employment.
On Monday la placosa returned with a female friend of similar placa (ie. tattoo) status. She inquired about employment although lacking the above requirements. The "hood rats" enjoyed free food, rum, cigarrettes, and music as my ended riding the executive desk.
With wet clothing from the afternoon rain the girls derobed into bath towels. A few minutes later they entered the pool for a skinny dipping session only a stone's throw from the executive desk.
They invited Meat Loaf to eat desert, but I declined for the second time. She inquired about employment; I told both that employment was available and to return on Tuesday for further conversation.
I have yet to see these hoes and will not until they need a free meal.
With the July 4th holiday present, so were the Gringos. Everywhere you looked were visions of snow (ie. Caucassians.) Single-retirees visiting from Costa Rica; cougars on the prowl for "Latin Lovers;" Patos (ie. gay guys) salivating for "twink;" 50-year old women in groups; and "Bible Thumpers" came in force!
The next invasion will take place in Agust for the Hipico Granadino.
I met a few of you guys and enjoyed the conversation. See you next time.
On the calzada all Gringos all prey being hunted by "las burgesitas." ¿Como, que eso? A "burgesita" is the local term used for street walkers Nicas that hunt down Gringos. North Americans love hamburgers and fast food. "Burgesitas" yearn for the "easy Dollar," not Cordoba. "Burgesitas" provide service on demand and sometimes "you can have it your way." "Burgesitas" are fast food. And with "tres platos," tongue, fish, beans, and possibly milk and carne, the Gringo may become well fed.
"Burgesitas" are those well dressed girls you see on the arms of Gringos.
Member #4167
07-11-09, 14:51
On Monday la placosa returned with a female friend of similar placa (ie. tattoo) status. She inquired about employment although lacking the above requirements. The "hood rats" enjoyed free food, rum, cigarrettes, and music as my ended riding the executive desk.
With wet clothing from the afternoon rain the girls derobed into bath towels. A few minutes later they entered the pool for a skinny dipping session only a stone's throw from the executive desk.
They invited Meat Loaf to eat desert, but I declined for the second time. She inquired about employment; I told both that employment was available and to return on Tuesday for further conversation.
I have yet to see these hoes and will not until they need a free meal.Good post, Meat Loaf,
Sometime I think your are bullsh1tt1ng about your escapades!
What you need are FOTOS man, FOTOS !!
Good post, Meat Loaf,
Sometime I think your are bullsh1tt1ng about your escapades!
What you need are FOTOS man, FOTOS !!
Fact or Fiction?
It's not a lie if at least 1% of truth is provided!
why these "bobos" volunteer to encite conversation about crack-cocaine is beyond my comprehension. freebase. primos.
this is a common question, "fumas piedra, crack?"
gringos, and your drug consumption have corrupted the granadino within the past five (5) years. throughout the downtown, el centro y la calzada area, is crack, cocaine, and mota. within walking distance- your neighbor(s)- are "crackheads."
as detailed in previous "meat loaf" posts, "nicaragua is 30 years behind the usa." 2009 - 30 = 1979, and the beginnings of crack and cocaine in the usa. the "war on drugs" decade. unfortunately, they think it's cool to smoke boulders.
cooking class: (1) purchase an 1/8-ounce of powder cocaine for us $150 in the usa or us $80 local. (2) get a baby food jar. (3) turn on the stove or burners. (4) get some water. (5) pour the 8-ball into the baby food jar. (6) pour the water so that it resembles dough for betty crocker. (7) don't use "comeback" or baking soda: these ingrediants are used to stretch the 8-ball. (an 8-ball produces 30-crack rocks when cut. 30-rocks = us $300 revenues.) if you're smoking the bolders there is no reason to cut, but smokers are also the sellers. they sell so that they can smoke for free. (8) get a pot of water and boil. (9) place the baby food bottle with cocaine inside of the boiling pot of water. (10) get a metal clothes hanger. (11) stir the cocaine-water mixture while boiling the baby food jar inside the pot of boiling water. (12) stir until it becomes "pasty." (13) get a pot of ice cubes. (14) remove the "pasty" mixture from the boiling water. (15) place the baby food jar inside of the ice with hanger attached / "clomped" onto the cocaine paste. (16) let the cocaine paste freeze up so that it grabs the hanger. (17) remove the hanger with freezed cocaine paste attached. (18) get a razor blade. (19) scrape the frozen cocaine paste from the hanger. (20) count your boulders. (21) get a cigarette, marijuana cigarette, or pipe. (21) lace the cigarette, joint, or place the rock at the end of the pipe. (22) grab a lighter, matches, or kitchen stove flame.
beam me up scotty!
what does "meat loaf" not know? ¡soy como a dios con el clase turca y tengo mas reales que o'bama!
this activity has taken over granada within the past five (5) years whereas it took over the usa during the 1980s'. the deportees were involved, served their time in the usa joint, and are back at home with this knowledge. i don't know who actually introduced this education- gringos or deportees- but it's here and here to stay!
gringos and thier influence: ¡que horror!
AlLostInSpace13
07-24-09, 08:02
Took a minivan from Managua to Leon on Sunday. Man that place is HOT, as in temperature. Checked into a cheapo hotel called Europa which was perhaps 4 blocks East and 3 blocks North of the Plaza Centro. Went to Viavia for lunch, but the place was full of backpacker chicks, not the kind of p4p chicks that I wanted. After taking a nap I ventured out to Plaza Centro for supper. Perhaps it was Sunday, but everything was closed by 9pm!!!
Saw a chica sitting by herself in a restaurant. I made a mental note to return if I didn't see any more opportunity elsewhere. Returned to the restaurant but chica was already gone. Had supper there anyways. While I was eating, the waiters were closing up. Fu*k!
Everything was closed by 10pm!!! Walked back to the hotel in the dark and found that the main gate was locked. Eventually got in and went to bed empty handed. Checked out the next day and went to Granada.
Took a minibus back to Managua and boarded a Granada-bound bus. I've learned my lesson, so this time I stayed at hotel Alhambra, which is right by Plaza Centro.
Multiple opportunities in Granada. Chicas at and around Plaza/Parque Centro after dark, plus on Calzada mostly tucked away at intersections with side streets. If all else fails, bellhop Mario will get a chica delivered to your room for $40 everything included. Do not, I repeat, do not ask the nightwatch old man for a chica, as he would 1) ask for $10 introduction fee, and 2) get you the first crackho he finds on the street. Of course, hotel Alhambra is totally girl-friendly.
Hated to leave Granada, but I had to go to SJDS.
Alex
Leon is the hottest city in Nicaragua. It's about 10 degrees hotter than Granada, 105 degrees, and has no breezes. It's hot! That sun will toast you.
As good Gringos they went to Costa Rica for retirment. As dumb a*s Gringos they "got played" by Ticas and produced offspring. As dumb a*s Gringos they "got played" by the Tica's family: The family went through the dumb a*s Gringos' money and their lack of ability to speak Spanish made it super-easy! Happy for "table scraps" dumb a*s Gringos married the Tica and resided in Costa Rica. Dumb a*s Gringos "got played" in the Costa Rican divorce and the Tica took all that he had in Costa Rica. The Costa Rican system of dumb a*s Gringo exploitation educated the Tica and USA child support laws. Dumb a*s Gringos are "scabbed-up" from their Costa Rican retirement.
The above is You!
Gringos became targets of Ticos looking to rob, steal, and extort. Afraid Gringos fled Costa Rica due to "street fear."
Retired Gringos are complaining that Costa Rica is "getting expensive." Retired Gringos are saying that Costa Rica has not respect for the dumb a*s, sucker a*s Gringo and is increasing the monthly income requirement of a retired-persons pension to US $2,000 per month. Retired Gringos are complaining that this financial requirement will "price out" the retirement community. Costa Rican authorities don't care 'cause there is a long file (ie. line) of "dumb a*s Gringos," "sucker a*s Gringos," and "bobos" (ie. fools.) In reality, where are these Gringos going to go?
Mexico: Gringos are scared of the drug war. And Mexico eats-up the Gringo. Costa Rica is simply duplicating what Mexico does.
Guatemala: For those that want the indigenous experience.
El Salvador: The streets and its plethora of "true believing Gang Members" will eat the Gringo up.
Honduras: Gringos are scared. They just stole an entire country. What will they do to the Gringo?
Nicaragua: Gringos are scared. The anti-Gringo sentiment is high and we're waiting on more sucker a*s Gringos to appear for the looting.
Costa Rica: 30-years of friendly USA relations. Cost of entry US $2,000. Tica exploitation.
Panama: 100-years of friendly USA relations.
Colombia: Friendly USA relations.
Ecuador: Not on the radar map.
Bolivia: The indigenous experience.
Argentina: The "white society of Latin America."
Uruguay: Not on the radar map.
Chile: Doing big things without the mainstream media exposure.
Peru: Doing big things without the mainstream media exposure.
Brazil: Portuguese spoken. Extremem poverty and street violence. Two worlds: Tourist and local. Gated communitities.
Venezuela: High anti-Gringo sentiment. Farsantes (ie. fakes and phonies) high. Not on the radar map.
Suriname: English spoken. Not on the radar map. Great citizenship.
French Guiana: Not on the radar map.
Guyana: English spoken. Not on the radar map. Great society.
Gringos, you're better off in Costa Rica: Stop being a "sucker a*s Gringo."
Gringos are complaining that Costa Rica is becoming "too Americanized." These Gringos don't even speak Spanish and make this comment! "Too Americanized" are the Gringos that live ultramar (ie. overseas) and don't speak the language. "Too Americanized" are the Gringos that don't think local, but think Gringo.
In summary, you Gringos need to stay in Costa Rica where you're comfortable. Don't think that Nicaragua is anywhere close to Costa Rica. We'll eat you up in Nicaragua and it's not attractive whatsoever. You may "hide" in Granada and San Juan del Sur where you're safe and comfortable. Anywhere else is a different story: You're not ready nor prepared for any other city besides the aforementioned. And forget about Managua 'cause you'll be carne molida, eventually!
Gringos that attempted to reside in Costa Rica are crying more than a newborn! 'Oh, it's expensive: They charge US $2 for a beer; they charge US $5 for a taxi; they charge for everything. And now they want us to have US $2,000 on a retirement pension.
Gringos retirados, you worked your entire lives (ie. age 18 - 62 = 44 years) in North America spending your money on Chinese consumer products, German consumer products, and USA consumer products, and want to come to Costa Rica broke! You're a caballo / slave to work so get back to work if you want this Tica p*ssy!
Costa Rica produces belleza (ie. natural beauty) and not North American-bound exports, Ticas excluded.
If you were not able to amass a pension of US $2,000 per month that's your fault! You should have saved and prepared for retirement. Don't think that you can buy other country exports and come to Costa Rica broke! They charge.
A Prince of Saudi Arabia just invested US $900 Billion!
What are you doing, Gringo?
So I completed eating Bistec Jalipeno at a neighbors home and looked-up from the plate. What did I see?
An adult chasing a fat, ten year old down the street. The adult secuestered the lad and removed his belt. He delivered some lashes for the simple reason of posterity. "Chub rock" didn't like. The adult returned to his bicycle. The nino walked up the street "talking sh*t" to the adult. The adult chased him down into the alley. "Chubby Checker" ran like Carl Lewis with backpack. The adult swirled the belt as if he were a cattle rancher.
I returned to my plate for more crema jalepena! A few onlookers watched the alley action for nothing more than entertainment and chisme.
AlLostInSpace13
07-27-09, 05:24
My last destination in Nicaragua was SJDS. Stayed at hotel villa Isabella. It was a mistake b/c hotel v.i. is very much a family oriented hotel. Not many solo traveller like myself, so it's not too politically correct to use it as a monger base, plus the walls are thin.
I've RTFF and know that there exists a cathouse, but I didn't feel too comfy to venture there on my own. The main drag was dimly lit and full of drunks at night. The local (drunk) hoodlums were just not making the place too welcoming. Plus after a full day at the beach, I just didn't have any energy left at the end of the day.
On my last night at SJDS (Thursday) the power went out and stayed out. Any bars that didn't have own generator would go silent, which is a very effective way to send customers on their ways. The streets became so dark which extinguished all hopes of going out to look for fun, plus the sight of hoodlums strolling the side streets on motorcycles... need I say more?
So to me, SJDS is not a monger-friendly place.
Alex
Chocha Monger
07-27-09, 07:33
Gringos that attempted to reside in Costa Rica are crying more than a newborn! 'Oh, it's expensive: They charge US $2 for a beer; they charge US $5 for a taxi; they charge for everything. And now they want us to have US $2,000 on a retirement pension.
Gringos retirados, you worked your entire lives (ie. age 18 - 62 = 44 years) in North America spending your money on Chinese consumer products, German consumer products, and USA consumer products, and want to come to Costa Rica broke! You're a caballo / slave to work so get back to work if you want this Tica p*ssy!
Costa Rica produces belleza (ie. natural beauty) and not North American-bound exports, Ticas excluded.
If you were not able to amass a pension of US $2,000 per month that's your fault! You should have saved and prepared for retirement. Don't think that you can buy other country exports and come to Costa Rica broke! They charge.
A Prince of Saudi Arabia just invested US $900 Billion!
What are you doing, Gringo?
The Ticos are astute. They saw the multitude of low budget pensionados and rentistas fleeing the economic calamity in North America to take up residence in Costa Rica. They didn't want all of these old gringos ending up on the streets in their country so they decided to raise the income requirements for immigration and make it mandatory for resident foreigners to participate in their social security system. The bar is still set very low. If sexpats can't meet it then they're probably better off staying at home and moving to a trailer park in the close vicinity of a Super Walmart.
The Ticos are astute. They saw the multitude of low budget pensionados and rentistas fleeing the economic calamity in North America to take up residence in Costa Rica. They didn't want all of these old gringos ending up on the streets in their country so they decided to raise the income requirements for immigration and make it mandatory for resident foreigners to participate in their social security system. The bar is still set very low. If sexpats can't meet it then they're probably better off staying at home and moving to a trailer park in the close vicinity of a Super Walmart.
I've heard that Costa Rica is empty due to Gringos not having credit card access anymore. A leader of Granada society just made the trip this weekend and came back with the information of pobresa costrariquense.
Gringos, I get just as much a*s from USA strip clubs. Probably more. How?
Go to the strip club, preferably BYOB (ie. bring your own bottle.) Girls don't want beer so bring some cheap liquor and soda. Seagrems 7, Jim Beam, McCormick Vodka. The hoes are leeches and will bombard your table. They don't want to work sober. Invite the dancers to your table and share drinks. If any stripper starts to trying to drink your liquort too fast and too quick, kick the b*tch out! The other strippers will realize that you aint no fool and babysit their tragos. When they ask for a table dance tell them no. Tell them to make their money off of the stupid a*s customers and then come back to the table. Direct the strippers as to whom is a "bobo." They will go and make their US $10 - US $20 for a 3-minute dance. (I aint stupid to pay those prices.) She will come back to your table and drink some more. When at your table pick-up one of the strippers and place her on your lap like a baby. Endulge in your beverage with her on your lap. Slide a finger into her snatch. Tell her that you want to f*ck her, but you are not going to pay. She may start talking sh*t, but will eventually come around. Obtain the contact information. F*ck after work lets out or on another day as to avoid USA prostitution law and exit fees.
Gringos, you can stay up there in the USA working caballo and still get a*s if you follow what I scribe. Don't try and run to Nicaragua thinking it will be easy and different. You get no p*ssy in the USA so you'll get less overseas. Be happy with your second and third wives, and the strip club. After all, you can't afford to live in Nicaragua. Why? No economy!
What's up fellas'?
So, the Gringos that live in Costa Rica made "the border run" every three (3) months for their visa stamps. We do the same too in Nicaragua, but usually turn around at Penas Blancas, Nicaragua / Costa Rica.
I don't know if you guys are the ultimate "lurker" or if Meat Loaf simply has way too much self-confidence in my international popularity via prose. I don't know, but....
Shot Man
An "employee" looking to make the money available through Meat Loaf association got hammered yesterday. Watching his "look and sound" weak, I took him out for a beer and counseling. He "tapped out" after 1-liter.
Salutations were exchanged among the gentleman lining the bar. Typical curiosities were shared: Employment, time "in-country," reasons for being "in-country," the hoes, and USA accomplishments were revealed. It turned out that I, Meat Loaf, and "Shot Man" are in the same industry and shared time within the same city.
Then it began: Shots for everyone! Jameson, Crown Royal, Tequila, Sambuka, and I "tapped out!"
"Shot Man" spent big money! The type of money we locals do not spend, so we loved it. "Shot Man" made me remember the "American Capitalistic Spirit." After depleting his cash flow, to the rescue was his British buddy of similar name. "Shot Man" being the man that he is, young, place the "Platinum Card" as collateral for more endulgence. Business cards were exchanged; Meat Loaf intentions of Costa Rica exploration and branch office interests were disclosed.
Nice guy you are "Shot Man" and I'll call you next week about the markets.
"Shot Man" volunteered that he'll drop US $50,000 and "Meat Loaf" too on a business venture for the Granada market. That's for letting me know.
Gringa Traveler
Sitting by herself drinking Tona and reading a book, I noticed her. Attempting to pay her bill, she approached the bar. Being the gentleman that I am, I allowed her to pay for her bill. And then I invited her to share my liter of Tona.
We exchanged the typical tourist conversation. She became intrigued with the conversation. I invited her to my 2,100 sq. foot house with pool for further amistad (ie. friendship.) She accepted!
Did I expect some p*ssy? No, but at least give me a blowj*b.
In Granada, there is no shortage of "backpackers" who by nature are almost as poor as Nicas. So, with more "floss" than Proctor Gamble I succeed. If you offer Gringas a beer and smile they may open the gates.
And as detailed earlier, Gringas love drugs, especially when overseas. "Gringa Traveler" confessed "that the only time" she smoke crack / crack cocaine / piedra / boulders was in Costa Rica. Looser! Suck these "Brass Balls," B-itch!
Gringo Daytrader
While conversing with "Gringa Traveler," "Gringo Daytrader" appeared. He must be a "lurker" 'cause he began discussing the markets. He discussed what trades he likes. I disclosed my trading markets and styles.
I've seen "Gringo Daytrader" for a few days and he's a jovial retiree.
"Gringa Traveler" became more intrigued as she sat within "earshot" of the conversation.
"Mr. Risk Management" from Europe appeared and shared conversation with all of the aforementioned "finance boys."
Gringa Traveler
She and I left the "watering hole" for the cajero automatico (ie. ATM machine.)
The "Finance Boys from Costa Rica" game me encouragement, handshakes, smiles, and cheers as the dame and I exited.
Walking to the "mansion" she asked more questions of a "P.I.M.P."
Arriving at the "mansion," I opened the 14-foot doors. I turned on the lights. And "wow, what a beautiful house" was heard. (I hear the same thing when I drop trousers too.)
Anyway, we shared conversation and "USA Patriotism." We, correction: She drank more beer. I told her I was getting "horny." I asked to stand-up so I can see the body. She did smiling. I asked for her to turn around so I can see that a*s. She did smiling. Not much- flat a*s- but I'll f*ck her. Why not?
Knowing that I was going to give her some "Real Wood," she asked what time it was. "1014 p.m. is the time," I replied using the cable television as my source. She commented, "wow, you have cable too!" Pobrecitas "Backpackers."
She "tapped out" saying that if she didn't leave she would end-up "getting stuck!" "Yes, you will get stuck" was my reply.
I grabbed a handful of a*s and there was some meat back there. I had a*s oozing from my fist as toothpaste from a tube. I held her a*s for about three (3) minutes as I attempted to get her to give me a blowj*b. She stayed strong. I thought about just pulling about the carne, but kept composure. Eventually, she exited the house with the an appointment to return.
Today, I'm suppose to have a date with this "horny a*s, sexy a*s piece of p*ssy!" Regardless, somebody is getting stuck via "hook or crook."
Two consecutive days of "street foreplay" and zero p*ssy obtainment. This has to and will stop tonight, Friday, July 30, 2009.
What are you doing?
Last Sunday, I was drinking a liter of Tona on my porch and the neighbor across then street approached. This chavo, no me cae bien a el, pero I didn't want to drink anymore and gave him the leftovers.
This want-to-be-boracho, sin plata, watches me spend C$ 200 diario buying beer.
This fool drank my beer and hid out for 1-week.
I told his family, my immediate neighbors, that I wanted my botella. The wife said she'll get the bottle returned to me last week.
I thought I saw the fool on Tuesday and yelled at him, but it was the senor whom I have respect for.
Tonight, I saw that fool: Where's my bottle or my US $0.50 for the botella. He had excuses. Where's my lana o botella. He had excuses. I slapped him with the left-backhand across the mouth! He attempted to raised up but I was on my porch surrounded by iron gates.
In Granada, these fools will attempt to run game on you 'cause they know you're going back to Europe o North America.
He walked up the street mumbling words.
So about 6-weeks ago, I gave this chavo C$50 to make a run. He "befriended" me through his family connections. I knew he was about bullsh*t from hello. Basehead (ie. crackhead.)
4-weeks ago I saw him at the "cock-fights" and he game an excuse about "now I'm working as a painter and can pay you what I stole." Alright!
Today, I saw him after 4-weeks passed: I called him out within the house of "his family." Donde esta mi C$50? Este puto me robo 50-baras. Oye, no soy un guedo, oyiste. Tu no puedes robar me ni peso, guey puta.
The chavalas looked-up to see my seriousness: I could get Cd. Juarez o Black USA and stomp his a*s, but I attempt to keep compure and "plot schemes."
He rebutted with razones (ie. excuses.) An a*s kicking is no relief of debt. I still want my lana.
His grandmother chimed-in saying that it was my fault for entrusting him with the US $2.50.
Que babosa!
Getting Cd. Juarez style: Necktie; choke this motherf*cker out; and drag his punk a*s outside to the street. Drab this motherf*cker, while choking him with necktie, up-and-down the street for the neighborhood to witness.
He told me later-on that my money will come. Which will come first, him gasping for air or my US $2.50.
You must get gutter 'cause these motherf*cker think Gringos are stupid and are here to fleece.
Chinga la tuya, soy Meat Loaf.
So, the first piece of Granada a*s I received was "charity d*ck." The b*tch wanted to compete with her ugly a*s "sister." I gave the b*tch some dick and let her suck my d*ck. The b*tch can't suck d*ck. The b*tch can swallow, but ....
Her punk a*s, ugly a*s sister was looking to create chisme (ie. gossip) and told my bartender that I was her sister's ex-boyfriend. B*tch, I aint nobody's ex-nada. I don't care about 'yall lame a*s hoes.
The bartender knows the score and didn't bit, but the b*tch accomplished her goals by putting my name in chisme. Fortunately, I don't give a f*ck and let all hoes spread eagle and hold more nutts in their mouths than Chimpmunks!
My immediate neighbors have witnessed me spending their entire monthly household income in 1-weekend!
They are successful! LOL.
They live within their bullsh*t compound of a lot. The share 1-car. They have white-skin. They are BS.
So, por fin, I saw the neighbor at the corner store. "Wow, neighbor, como estas." She didn't answer. "Cabrona, tu no puedes contestar?" "No quiro." "Eres farsante. Eres pirate. Tu quires ser rico pero soy rico. Soy Gringo, puta." "Que presumida eres tu para nada, guey puta."
The b*tch walked away. I conversed with the grocery store owners about this fake-and-phony a*s family. The agreed with Meat Loaf.
These phony a*s Granadinas better stay within their caged compound 'cause the cholos y yo tienen hambre.
In Latin America, the poor will eat you a*s so don't act like you're special. You must SURVIVE your environment regardless of your dreams of mental image of oneself.
Truth be told, I'm more successful in Nicaragua than this family. How? I have political, commercial, and social ties while they have "presumida."
Buey Puta!
Before my eyes were a "pack" of Gringas!
I like white hoes despite my rants: I like watching their faces turn colors like the rainbow when their legs are hoisted high!
Before my eyes was a cougar looking sexy with sunglasses. Without the glasses, she is "do-able."
Her carnalas (ie. sisters) were ay-ay (ie. alright.)
One hoe was peppered with freckles, but a cool persona. Her immediate "ace boom coon" was a nice b-itch with great highlights (ie. mechas.) Clean and smooth tan was her color. In her arm pits she has a speck of white, but her personality wasn't hitting properly.
Instead, it was the "pepper pecker wrecker."
Having spent time in the Canadian Prairies, we bonded. These hoes roll in Halifax to boot. More Canadian experiences and exposure of Meat Loaf. (Where have you not been Meat Loaf? 'Yo momma. Moose Jaw, Windsor, Winnipeg, Saskatoon, and Regina are Meat Loaf centers of Canadian activity.)
In Granada, you meet the world, but unfortunately chasing tourist trap is futile due to their schedule and mentalities. In Granada, it's all about "people watching."
I can watch p*ssy on the ISG Picture Galleries.
I think it's romantic how the Granadinos use a bicycle as the family transportation mode. What' even more "cute" is how the male drives the "bicy" and the females sit on the crossbar at a 45 degree angle.
Wearing skirts / shorts / jeans and sandals the females sit on the crossbar and use the handlebar as their armrest. The male peddles the "bicy" almost "spread eagle" due to the woman sitting within his crotch area.
Sometimes you will see an entire family (ie. father, mother, newborn baby, toddler, and 5-year old) riding upon the same "bicy" at the same time. How? The father sits on the seat; the mother sits on the crossbar; the newborn is being held by the mother; the toddler sits between the father and mother on the crossbar or sits on the rear luggage rack; and the 5-year stands on the rear axle pegs.
It's cute when you see an attractive girl being "taxied" around town in this manner.
Lastly, in Granada, everyone has a "bicy" just as everyone in California has a car or everyone in New York City takes the subway: The bicycle is the Granada mode of transportation. The have bicycle parking lots and not cars.
After 10-hours of Managua, the city I claim and prefer, I returned to the "friendly confines."
Exploring Granada for the benefit of "Nica Bound" and "snitchin'" on ISG, I went to a new "watering hole." Being introduced to the ownership of this cantina, we shared conversation about conducting business in Nicaragua. He received a "crash course" in what I've scribed on ISG for 3-years. At closing time, I invited him to the disco- "Cafe Nuit."
"Cafe Nuit" is really is the only disco worthy of patronage in Granada. The Gringos arrive in Granada eager to speak Spanish and dance salsa. It's evident that the Gringos took Spanish and salsa classes 'cause they attack the dance floor as I do hoes.
We had a nice time at the disco where I received saludos from the local population.
Present was my neighbor who educated me on the Granada male-female scene. He validated that Managua is "my turf" and Granada is "his turf." He stated that Granadinas charge for p*ssy and only Gringas on vacation will give the p*ssy away for US $0.
(If I wanted Gringo p*ssy I would have / will return to the USA.)
Tired from 15-hours of bacanal / pachanguero, I returned home alone.
Sunday, August 9, 2009: Running of the bulls.
Friday, August 14, 2009: Carnaval.
Sunday, August 16, 2009: Hipico.
¡Hay Demesiado Gringos Aca! There are way too many Gringos here. Being that I reside en el el sede central de la cuidad, I'm surrounded by 1 - 7 day Gringo tourists. My earlier residence was only a few blocks away, four, and Gringos never ventured over there. Nonetheless, I maintain "Living Large" status on Nicaragua's most valuable piece of real estate.
On Sunday, I hosted a small gathering of "old neighborhood" associates at my residence which lined the street where the "Bulls and Fools" embarqued!
Flor de Cana, sexual inuindo, and dominoes were enjoyed by the visitantes.
Approximately twelve bulls ran throughout the streets of Granada alongside hundreds of "fools." The vaqueros camadeered the bulls; the police maintained order; and the "wanksters" attempted to be strong. Habia demesiado cholos por las calles en el domingo pasado.
As the bulls were being led throughout the streets by cowboys and their ropes they would slip-and-slide along the cobblestone streets. And when the bulls fell, the fools appeared. Kicking the bulls in the testicles; kicking the bulls in the head; beating the bulls with the belts from their pants; throwing aluminan cans of Tona at the bulls; and other animal cruelty marked the "Granada Tradition."
This was my first and last patronage of "Granada's Running of the Bulls" and fools!
As the bulls ran down my residential street some knuckleheads attempted to enter my home for safety. I had to protect my entry way with double-bladed machetes! The "onlookers" asked for water which I refused. They became mad as if I'm their waiter. I was glad when the nonsense ended!
Now, I must endure Friday and Sunday's mayhem. Wish me luck :)
The day started off wrong by me arising at 0600 hours due to the fact that I was f*cking until midnight! What were you doing, "Rosie Palm?"
So in Parque Central at 0800 was music blasting. A mini-party was underway as they prepared the stages for Friday's Carnaval and Sunday's Hipico. As a "Good Gringo," I was at work and couldn't participate in the activities of the "US $10 per day backpackers" and "Transient Gringos."
After a complete day of "American Capitalism," I went to the "watering hole" at 1700 hours. I was told the Carnaval started at 1700, but did not. I endulged in some "Cocibolca Fish" and departed for my mansion.
Sleeping from 6 p.m. until 9 p.m. was a delight, but the loud sounds of the marching bands and drumlines encouraged me to witness the celebration. I departed for the street and witnessed the parade. Nothing Special: Nothing worthy of International Travel!
I conversed with my neighbor until this writing of this post.
In summary, the Carnaval is nothing special for those that live a party, daily. The Carnaval is a reason for party to those that don't: The Carnaval is similar to New Years Eve, but less fun!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXJuZYO22yc&feature=related
I scribe this quick revelation and information for 'yall.
The scene in Granada, Nicaragua, Central America is:
1. Granada has almost 0% Gringa (ie. white girl) residents.
2. The Gringas (ie. white women from Europe and North America) are 30 - 50 year old "Cougars" hunting "Latin Lovers" of 20 - 30 years of age.
3. Gringas (ie. white girls) that are in Granada are 1 - 3 day tourists! The Gringas that live here are here on 1 - 3 week tours that encompass all of Central America. Gringas (ie. white girls) are not the objective, but for a Nica Male searching for the "Green Card" via "cock" is their market. The residents.
4. Gringos (ie. North America and Europe) are almost all retired! The residents.
5. The Gringo community is almost all retired! The residents.
6. Granada Retiree Community (ie. white guys) is 55 - 75 years of age. And speak very "weak or limited" Spanish. The residents.
7. Granada Gringo Community share the same "street walker" p*ssy! The residents.
8. Granada Gringo Community is comprised of "caballos" running the treadmill of North America (ie. Capitalism.) They serve time in "Corporate America" and take reprieve in Nicaragua when possible. Every 3, 6, and / or 12-months is their interaction with Granada, Nicaragua, Central America.
9. Granada Gringo Community is 100% "people watching."
10. Granada Gringo Community is almost 100% male!
Do you still want to conquer Nicaragua? I thought not!
I, Meat Loaf, am in Granada, Nicaragua, for business purposes! All Gringos in Nicaragua must "put in work" in Granada to build relationships for SURVIVAL! You cannot do it alone! You will get defeated without the "Red d Gringo."
Socially, Granada is not Nicaragua! Read the previous 1,100 Meat Loaf posts for more elaboration.
Originally Posted by Meat Loaf
Sunday, August 9, 2009: Running of the bulls.
Friday, August 14, 2009: Carnaval.
Sunday, August 16, 2009: Hipico.
Today is the day that everyone from around the world anticipates when Nicaragua is concerned! Today is the horse parade / street party. It's equivalent to Carnaval in Salvador, Bahia, Brazil, Sur America. 'O yeah!
How much is your horse worth? Horses from around the world arrive? Who's who? Who's poor? Who cares is the mode, but everyone knows money when they see money! I'm not a horse guy, but will learn. http://www.volcanoranchnicaragua.com/
This will be my first Hipico anywhere in the country after 4-years of residency!
Will I ride horses throughout the city? Will I get some a*s from the heiñas? Will I get robbed by the Managua street gangs that are present? Will I hear "what's up Blacks?" What will today bring?
On my street, the #1 real estate location for Nicaragua, are multiple stages where concerts will be in effect!
What will today bring? It starts at 1400 hours! Remember: I have to work tomorrow in the North American market so responsibility is the term of the day.
Hipico Grandadino: The largest festival for Nicaragua!
Today is the day that everyone from around the world anticipates when Nicaragua is concerned! Today is the horse parade / street party. It's equivalent to Carnaval in Salvador, Bahia, Brazil, Sur America. 'O yeah!
How much is your horse worth? Horses from around the world arrive? Who's who? Who's poor? Who cares is the mode, but everyone knows money when they see money! I'm not a horse guy, but will learn. http://www.volcanoranchnicaragua.com/
This will be my first Hipico anywhere in the country after 4-years of residency!
Will I ride horses throughout the city? Will I get some a*s from the heiñas? Will I get robbed by the Managua street gangs that are present? Will I hear "what's up Blacks?" What will today bring?
On my street, the #1 real estate location for Nicaragua, are multiple stages where concerts will be in effect!
What will today bring? It starts at 1400 hours! Remember: I have to work tomorrow in the North American market so responsibility is the term of the day.
Hipico Grandadino: The largest festival for Nicaragua!
For me and many others, the Hipico was nothing special! When you "live the dream" everyday, another day of public drunken madness is nothing special.
Certain street festivals capture their participants: Calle 8 in Miami; West Indian Day Parade in Brooklyn; Puerto Rican Day Parade in Manhattan; Carnaval in Rio de Janiero, Brazil; etcetera. Hipico Granadino did not capture me nor my compadres.
Of course, pretty women were present which is not difficult when you're wearing your "Sunday's Best" clothing. Granada, Nicaragua, day-in and day-out is nothing more than people watching. Very little action takes place beyond people watching.
There was another rich Gringa who looked sexy. She has beautiful blonde hair, a nice tan, and few extra pounds to hold onto. I invited her to f*ck, but she denied herself the opportunity. Good for me 'cause I don't like "Heavy Hittin'."
There was a Black chick that I saw on Saturday and Sunday throughout the circuit. She really is not my flavor, but 'cause I rarely see Black people, I attempted to "hacer amistad." She interviewed me; I surpassed her expectations, or at least should have; I invited her to share my bed, but she refused. She opted for the group hostel: How weak is Meat Loaf when a girl will choose to sleep on a bunk-bed versus my 3,000 sq. foot mansion located on Nicaragua's most valuable real estate. At least C$ 150 will never deny my advances.
I saw a few people from the "old neighborhood" in Managua.
In Conclusion, despite the hype, "Hipico Granadino" is not worthy of international travel nor local ex-pat participation.
I've told you guys for 3-years how these Chicas Nicas lie from hello!
I've told you guys for 3-years how these Chicas y Chicos Nicas do not think about the future beyond the immediate "getting over."
I've told you guys for 3-years that they've developed their strategy on how to fleece the Gringo before you board the plane in North America for Nicaragua.
I've told you guys for 3-years that "thinking Gringo" will get you exploited.
Cocha Monger has told you guys that the Gringos who thrive in Latin America do so 'cause "they don't give a f*ck!"
So, I imported a chavala from Managua to Granada. She's an associate that I've known for a while and more than likely she's researched my fame among the Managua streets. In fact, I'm sure she researched me and has witnessed me for a while. What was she thinking I am / was? "Bobo the Fool!?
She cool, but like always- Chicas Nicas- she started with lie(s).
I told her on Day 1 that I know Chicas Nicas lie as conversation: "Chicas lie every other sentence" was my statement! She looked at me as if I should guard my words or was telling a lie with such declaration.
Ok, so I already knew / know that she's a liar simply because she's a Chica Nica and their attempts at "running game" are so elementary!
While at work in the North American market, she and I watched internet porno. The porno she evidently loves 'cause she started drinking beer, sucking her fingers, and moving around in her chair. I guess those Big Black D*cks wet her appetite: I know watching those Big Black D*cks wet her p*ssy.
Like always, I offered her the opportunity to attempt at earning US $2,000 per month. The amount impresses her: She's witnessed her fellow citizens earning US $220 per day for the past 2-weeks. She expressed interest in the occupation: I propositioned her the opportunity to attempt at earning US $2,000 per month in my Mexico office for the ease of language.
Like all Chicas Nicas, the easier route to riches is p*ssy sales (ie. la venta.)
Post-porno, we f*cked!
Post-f*cking, we went to the Calzada for beverages.
I already knew her style from several months of interraction. How? Chica Nica experience for almost 4-years. Tengo hambre. Tengo hambre. Areglarme un pantalon. Areglarme una chanela. Tengo hambre. I bit: US $3.50; US $5; US $10; US $0.00; US $0.00.
On the Calzada we share a Liter of Tona, 12-inch hot dog, and onion rings at O'Sheas. While sharing each others' company, "Jabber Jaws" approached. Ordering a Coca Cola, "Jabber Jaws" sat down at the table next to us.
"Jabber Jaws" spends his time walking the streets of Granada's el Centro selling product. What product? I can't disclose, but it's 100% legal. "Jabber Jaws" gave me the "low down" on Granada when I visited a few months ago. "Jabber Jaws" was a fine senor until today.
So, "Jabber Jaws" points out a few streetwalkers to my female companion. My female companion looked at the competition. "Jabber Jaws" begins to tell those "Granada Tales / Tells / Tails" of Chicas Nicas landing "Sucker A*s Gringos" and getting sponsored / permanent mantener. My female companion begins to get excited and envisions herself fleecing a Gringo. What Gringo? Meat Loaf or anybody! Why Meat Loaf? 'Cause she's witness my "Fama Managua," Granada lifestyle, and had gained temporary access to my real estate and "chump change." Granted, the "chump change" is mucho for her, but was given voluntarily and temporarily.
"Jabber Jaws" who 100% Nicaraguan and 100% Spanish continues telling her about the "Great Gringo Fleecing" that occurs in Granada. She pontifies that Granada es Negocio. She begins to envision herself running the Granada streets in search of a Gringo to fleece on the permanent mantener program enforced by the USA embassy.
"Jabber Jaws" discloses to her that child support is and can be enforced through the USA embassy. She gets shocked, happy, and begins to plot! "Jabber Jaws" tells her what information to acquire to the "Granada Gringo Fleece:" Complete name, email address, residential address while in Nicaragua, passport number or driver's license number, and city / state of USA residence.
"Jabber Jaws" pointed out some sucker a*s retired Gringos paying for companionship. "Jabber Jaws" disclosed to my female companion that Gringos pay US $20 for 30-minutes of sex: "Jabber Jaws" and Nicaraguans consider prostitution a job / employment. Trabajo es Trabajo!
I corrected "Jabber Jaws" and disclosed that sucker a*s Gringos pay US $30 - US $40 per polvo mas hotel. She was excited.
"Jabber Jaws" used a few retired Gringos as examples of the Granada prostitution scene which sponsors Chicas Nicas with housing, monthly mantener, and other regalos for nothing. She gets more excited.
"Jabber Jaws" attempts to obtain my female companion's phone number, but I disenfranchised the attempt.
I saw goodbye to "Jabber Jaws" with a handshake and soon follows. She signals to "Jabber Jaws" that she'll be in contact for more "Granada Game" techniques.
When we departed the Calzada, she attempted to verify my address. Rookie!
Visiting another restaurant off the beaten path, I dilute her fantasies of playing Meat Loaf like a "Pooh Butt with a Fresh Crew Cut." I drop game on this b*tch.
Witnessing how this hoe became excited at the "Granada Game" techniques revealed by "Jabber Jaws, disgusted me and I decided to drop this hoe like a "Hot Potatoe."
At location #2, she and I conversed about many topics including Chicas Nicas and their weak techniques. I revealed that my 10-years of day-in and day-out Latin America residency in four (4) countries is no match for her. I revealed that "Sucker A*s Gringos," mainly retired Gringos, do exist, but that aint me.
The real Meat Loaf was revealed not the fantasy she thought she was playing!
She stated that she has no problem walking the Granada streets of el Centro in search of her lottery ticket. I double-checked her statement. She confirmed her earlier statement. I became disgusted and more entrenched in Latin America thoughts as detailed by "Chocha Monger."
Chocha Monger: The Gringos that SURVIVE Latin America do so 'cause they don't give a f*ck!
I revealed to her that attempting to play Meat Loaf is futile and detrimental to her salud! Not having much exposure to the First World (ie. G8,) she looked at the ambiance and laptop computers. Her head was spinning and has been spinning from the First World window-view.
She became more and more scared of her elementary aspiration at attempting to play Meat Loaf. We returned home and more disgusting personality traits of Meat Loaf were revealed. She learned that any attempt at fleecing Meat Loaf is / would be futile and I simply don't give a f*ck!
I don't give a f*ck which is why I thrive in Latin America!
I disclosed to her of my pending relocation to Brazil. She asked when as if to plot her time schedule for larcenous actions. I didn't not disclose. She attempted to use the Chica Nica "abandonment" technique / statement. I told her that I don't give a f*ck as evidenced by past Chicas Nicas who attempted to play Meat Loaf.
Meat Loaf revealed that many have come-and-gone before she, and I still thrive unmolested. She became informed and her mental aspirations of Meat Loaf to go is muted.
I've detailed for 3-years that the Gringo is disposable and the only thing Nicaraguans want is permanent financial support. It's the culture and ever household exists in the exploitation of some sucker to pay the household bills.
If Chicas Nicas attempt to play that with Meat Loaf they are the ones that get played and damaged, not Meat Loaf.
When my security guard arrives this morning, she will "dumped" with the experience of having had access to a real life via effort (ie. US $2,000 per month) and not "fleece" (ie. Gringo Exploitation; Prostitution.)
Always have a security guard to serve as witness when Chicas Nicas are concerned. When you "dump" them you need someone to bear witness and prevent final extortion attempts and other playto (ie.bullshit.) I keep a security guard on payroll and you must. I keep a maid on payroll and you must. Why? For your SURVIVAL!
She played herself: I disclosed to her that the "traps" Chicas Nicas attempt to play have already been diffused by the time Meat Loaf arrives and that those "traps" must be played on "Sucker A*s Gringos" like You (ie. ISG Lurker(s.))
She confessed to two (2) lies: She placed herself on a faulty foundation as they all do when they say "hello" (ie. lies.)
Meat Loaf in Granada: The above is why I do not like Granada, Nicaragua, Central America for residency. Managua is a much better environment void of such fleecing. I'm simply in Granada for business!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK7eGBD7EiA&feature=related
It appears that the only Gringos who travel beyond the USA shores are Gringos with tattoos. Sleeves, socks, tramp stamps, bracelets and piercings are the chosen wardrobe for Gringos.
The locals (ie. Granadinos) are covered in placas too! What separates the tattoos of Nicas to Gringos is that Nicas perform their tattoos in prisons around the world or the street corners of Granada with compass and needle.
I, personally, do not like tattoos, but I do like sl*ts with tattoos. Why? Stereotype: Easy pussy due their need and desire for attention, especially tramp stamps.
In Granada, it's tattoo crazy.
Someone looking for a business and fun should open a tattoo shop in Granada's el Centro. It will allow you to f*ck all of the Gringa tourists with ease, and f*ck the local "knucklehead" Chicas Nicas who want better appearing tattoos after the debacle they received with compass.
Chocha Monger
08-22-09, 19:06
I've told you guys for 3-years how these Chicas Nicas lie from hello!
I've told you guys for 3-years how these Chicas y Chicos Nicas do not think about the future beyond the immediate "getting over."
I've told you guys for 3-years that they've developed their strategy on how to fleece the Gringo before you board the plane in North America for Nicaragua.
I've told you guys for 3-years that "thinking Gringo" will get you exploited.
Cocha Monger has told you guys that the Gringos who thrive in Latin America do so 'cause "they don't give a f*ck!"
So, I imported a chavala from Managua to Granada. She's an associate that I've known for a while and more than likely she's researched my fame among the Managua streets. In fact, I'm sure she researched me and has witnessed me for a while. What was she thinking I am / was? "Bobo the Fool!?
She cool, but like always- Chicas Nicas- she started with lie(s).
I told her on Day 1 that I know Chicas Nicas lie as conversation: "Chicas lie every other sentence" was my statement! She looked at me as if I should guard my words or was telling a lie with such declaration.
Ok, so I already knew / know that she's a liar simply because she's a Chica Nica and their attempts at "running game" are so elementary!
While at work in the North American market, she and I watched internet porno. The porno she evidently loves 'cause she started drinking beer, sucking her fingers, and moving around in her chair. I guess those Big Black D*cks wet her appetite: I know watching those Big Black D*cks wet her p*ssy.
Like always, I offered her the opportunity to attempt at earning US $2,000 per month. The amount impresses her: She's witnessed her fellow citizens earning US $220 per day for the past 2-weeks. She expressed interest in the occupation: I propositioned her the opportunity to attempt at earning US $2,000 per month in my Mexico office for the ease of language.
Like all Chicas Nicas, the easier route to riches is p*ssy sales (ie. la venta.)
Post-porno, we f*cked!
Post-f*cking, we went to the Calzada for beverages.
I already knew her style from several months of interraction. How? Chica Nica experience for almost 4-years. Tengo hambre. Tengo hambre. Areglarme un pantalon. Areglarme una chanela. Tengo hambre. I bit: US $3.50; US $5; US $10; US $0.00; US $0.00.
On the Calzada we share a Liter of Tona, 12-inch hot dog, and onion rings at O'Sheas. While sharing each others' company, "Jabber Jaws" approached. Ordering a Coca Cola, "Jabber Jaws" sat down at the table next to us.
"Jabber Jaws" spends his time walking the streets of Granada's el Centro selling product. What product? I can't disclose, but it's 100% legal. "Jabber Jaws" gave me the "low down" on Granada when I visited a few months ago. "Jabber Jaws" was a fine senor until today.
So, "Jabber Jaws" points out a few streetwalkers to my female companion. My female companion looked at the competition. "Jabber Jaws" begins to tell those "Granada Tales / Tells / Tails" of Chicas Nicas landing "Sucker A*s Gringos" and getting sponsored / permanent mantener. My female companion begins to get excited and envisions herself fleecing a Gringo. What Gringo? Meat Loaf or anybody! Why Meat Loaf? 'Cause she's witness my "Fama Managua," Granada lifestyle, and had gained temporary access to my real estate and "chump change." Granted, the "chump change" is mucho for her, but was given voluntarily and temporarily.
"Jabber Jaws" who 100% Nicaraguan and 100% Spanish continues telling her about the "Great Gringo Fleecing" that occurs in Granada. She pontifies that Granada es Negocio. She begins to envision herself running the Granada streets in search of a Gringo to fleece on the permanent mantener program enforced by the USA embassy.
"Jabber Jaws" discloses to her that child support is and can be enforced through the USA embassy. She gets shocked, happy, and begins to plot! "Jabber Jaws" tells her what information to acquire to the "Granada Gringo Fleece:" Complete name, email address, residential address while in Nicaragua, passport number or driver's license number, and city / state of USA residence.
"Jabber Jaws" pointed out some sucker a*s retired Gringos paying for companionship. "Jabber Jaws" disclosed to my female companion that Gringos pay US $20 for 30-minutes of sex: "Jabber Jaws" and Nicaraguans consider prostitution a job / employment. Trabajo es Trabajo!
I corrected "Jabber Jaws" and disclosed that sucker a*s Gringos pay US $30 - US $40 per polvo mas hotel. She was excited.
"Jabber Jaws" used a few retired Gringos as examples of the Granada prostitution scene which sponsors Chicas Nicas with housing, monthly mantener, and other regalos for nothing. She gets more excited.
"Jabber Jaws" attempts to obtain my female companion's phone number, but I disenfranchised the attempt.
I saw goodbye to "Jabber Jaws" with a handshake and soon follows. She signals to "Jabber Jaws" that she'll be in contact for more "Granada Game" techniques.
When we departed the Calzada, she attempted to verify my address. Rookie!
Visiting another restaurant off the beaten path, I dilute her fantasies of playing Meat Loaf like a "Pooh Butt with a Fresh Crew Cut." I drop game on this b*tch.
Witnessing how this hoe became excited at the "Granada Game" techniques revealed by "Jabber Jaws, disgusted me and I decided to drop this hoe like a "Hot Potatoe."
At location #2, she and I conversed about many topics including Chicas Nicas and their weak techniques. I revealed that my 10-years of day-in and day-out Latin America residency in four (4) countries is no match for her. I revealed that "Sucker A*s Gringos," mainly retired Gringos, do exist, but that aint me.
The real Meat Loaf was revealed not the fantasy she thought she was playing!
She stated that she has no problem walking the Granada streets of el Centro in search of her lottery ticket. I double-checked her statement. She confirmed her earlier statement. I became disgusted and more entrenched in Latin America thoughts as detailed by "Chocha Monger."
Chocha Monger: The Gringos that SURVIVE Latin America do so 'cause they don't give a f*ck!
I revealed to her that attempting to play Meat Loaf is futile and detrimental to her salud! Not having much exposure to the First World (ie. G8,) she looked at the ambiance and laptop computers. Her head was spinning and has been spinning from the First World window-view.
She became more and more scared of her elementary aspiration at attempting to play Meat Loaf. We returned home and more disgusting personality traits of Meat Loaf were revealed. She learned that any attempt at fleecing Meat Loaf is / would be futile and I simply don't give a f*ck!
I don't give a f*ck which is why I thrive in Latin America!
I disclosed to her of my pending relocation to Brazil. She asked when as if to plot her time schedule for larcenous actions. I didn't not disclose. She attempted to use the Chica Nica "abandonment" technique / statement. I told her that I don't give a f*ck as evidenced by past Chicas Nicas who attempted to play Meat Loaf.
Meat Loaf revealed that many have come-and-gone before she, and I still thrive unmolested. She became informed and her mental aspirations of Meat Loaf to go is muted.
I've detailed for 3-years that the Gringo is disposable and the only thing Nicaraguans want is permanent financial support. It's the culture and ever household exists in the exploitation of some sucker to pay the household bills.
If Chicas Nicas attempt to play that with Meat Loaf they are the ones that get played and damaged, not Meat Loaf.
When my security guard arrives this morning, she will "dumped" with the experience of having had access to a real life via effort (ie. US $2,000 per month) and not "fleece" (ie. Gringo Exploitation; Prostitution.)
Always have a security guard to serve as witness when Chicas Nicas are concerned. When you "dump" them you need someone to bear witness and prevent final extortion attempts and other playto (ie.bullshit.) I keep a security guard on payroll and you must. I keep a maid on payroll and you must. Why? For your SURVIVAL!
She played herself: I disclosed to her that the "traps" Chicas Nicas attempt to play have already been diffused by the time Meat Loaf arrives and that those "traps" must be played on "Sucker A*s Gringos" like You (ie. ISG Lurker(s.))
She confessed to two (2) lies: She placed herself on a faulty foundation as they all do when they say "hello" (ie. lies.)
Meat Loaf in Granada: The above is why I do not like Granada, Nicaragua, Central America for residency. Managua is a much better environment void of such fleecing. I'm simply in Granada for business!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK7eGBD7EiA&feature=related
Meat Loaf,
She wanted to put you on a 21 year payment plan. Thanks to "Jabber Jaws" she now realizes that putting gringos on child support is "cien perciento rentable" (100% profitable) and she couldn't wait to get you on the program. She is a novato but she will learn. Maybe she'll even get an old gringo on the program.
Here is what a chica Nica needs to do to catch a gringo for 100% profits:
Step 1. Erase all tattoos or cover them up with modest clothing.
Step 2. Find a church, preferably one with lots of gringo evangelicals visiting on a regular basis.
Step 3. Participate regularly in church activities especially those that involve helping visiting gringos.
Step 4. Act all pious and humilde (humble) and extol the virtues of la pobreza (poverty).
Step 5. Wait on the gringos hand and foot. Be 100% submissive.
Step 6. On field outings let the old gringos get a glimpse of brown cleavage and legs accidentally.
Step 7. When old gringos try to fuck tell them, "Yo no soy esa clase de chica." (I'm not that type of girl.)
Step 8. She informs the gringo lecher that she likes him but the price of admission to her panocha is nothing less than marriage. Anything less would be a sin.
Step 9. She keeps in regular phone contact with the gringo after he returns home and begins processing the paperwork for her visa. She makes sure that the church elders know of her relationship with Mr. Gringo.
Step 10. Receive the visa, enter the US, get married and get pregnant. Give Mr. Gringo 2 to 3 nenes. She is now set for life!
Step 11. Start demanding to see the bank books. Manage Mr. Gringos finances. Keep him at home with fits of jealousy. Drive all his male friends away. Tell everyone including his family that he is not at home when they call.
Step 12. If Mr. Gringo complains divorce him and take him to the cleaners. With 2 to 3 nenes and no pre-nup she has 80% of his assets, income and future earnings.
This information is provided free of charge!
isg senior member and i have known one another for some time. isg senior member is your peer and has held relations with the land of lakes & volcanoes for nearly a decade. isg senior member enjoys meat loaf posts as do you and at times it's difficult for isg senior member to decipher is meat loaf posts are fact or fiction. after our 9-hour excursion there is no doubt that meat loaf posts are 100% truth!
i, "me loaf," socialize in the daylight, but for isg senior member i made an exception at did the "nightlife thing." why? like you, isg senior member can't afford to live here due to the "golden handcuffs."
"golden handcuffs" are the esposas (ie. handcuffs; wife) that gringos onshore (ie. mainland usa) are exist under. jobs that require your physical presence to be in the "land of the free." debt that require your financial and physical presence to be in the "land of the free." other responsibilities and "acts of life" that make offshore or expat existence a dream and temporary reality through vacations. understanding your esclavatud (ie. slavery obligation) to the "fruited plain," i ventured into the unknown.
safe & close to home
meeting isg senior member in the mid-evening he took me to an unfamiliar location. as detailed in meat loaf posts, granada offers live mongering activities beyond the streetwalkers, both male and female. chisme (ie. gossip) educated me on a location called "blue foxies" located on the carretera between catarina and masaya kilometer marker 35. and a a good isg senior member he did a drive-by to verfiy this locations existence days before our outing.
for days isg senior member attempted to contact meat loaf via cellphone, but to no avail. reason being, i rarely use the cellphone except for security measures. after numerous attempts to contact "me loaf," i answered to phone to receive a verbal "a*s chewing" for not answering prior. nonetheless, we finalized our reunion (ie. meeting.)
(within the 3,000 sq. foot mansion i had an employee on "lock down." she was keeping the p*ssy on ice for me until i returned home to deliver her trago de leche. prior to my departure the b*tch got sensitive 'cause i suggested that someone used-up my us $30 in cellphone minutes within the past few days. she was upset and "got nica." "getting nica" encompasses lots of shouting, yelling, and emotions. through talent, i was able to calm the b*tch down as to where i was not concerned about her thievery or destruction of property. living dangerously.)
leaving parque central de granada we entered the suv. (i should note that "this gringo" demands respect based upon physical presence and chele skin. the five (5) streetwalkers that were sitting in the gazebo heckled and shouted at the isg senior member to purchase a piece of p*ssy, but he had other plans that "stank streetwalker c*nt.)
boarding into the suv, we departed from parque central de granada. isg senior member was excited to introduce "me loaf" to a new location that could become fodder for present and future international sex guide posts. with more education and knowledge of the departamentos than i, "me loaf" learned from those more educated than i. with pen and paper in hand i took notes from isg senior member.
por fin, after 20-minutes of driving from parque central de granada para la carretera entre catarina y masaya km 35, we arrived at the location. as we approached the establishment excited brewed.
pulling the suv into the parking lot, we departed the vehicle with smiles and grins. as "official translator," i said hola para the parking lot security guard. isg senior member and i, "me loaf," entered "blue foxies." with a "tube steak" lleno (ie. full) of lemonade i ventured to the bathroom.
having survived the bathroom's pool of [CodeWord140] (http://isgprohibitedwords.info?CodeWord=CodeWord140), i returned to our table. isg senior member asked about the ambiance of the bathroom and i suggested that pissing outside at a tree is more inviting.
at our plastic table and on our plastic chairs that lined the stage, we order dos toña. at their respective tables were approximately eight (8) lazy hoes not concerned about turning tricks or getting drinks. with extreme difficulty, isg senior member and i could not converse due to the overly-obnoxious music called, "reggaeton."
with nothing else to do and for entertainment, i called over a 25-year old skinny b*tch for conversation. she came to the table. i began "spitting game" at the dame. she pacified my / our conversation with "lame a*s interest." as evident by her "wh*re-workers," they don't want to earn no money. these skeezers aint concerned about making money: gringos are more concerned about making money than the poverish. and with this fact, why would you volunteer your earnings to them based upon sympathy? nonetheless, isg senior member slipped the 6.5 hoe c$ 100. if the b*tch had a conversation she might be a 7.5 on the 10-scale, but she's lame.
in true meat loaf fashion, i offered "slim and silent" a job in the mansion, but she was not interested. instead, she liked the loteria of us $5 daily earnings.
the two (2) isg senior members departed this location.
as the "official expert" of nicaragua, i, meat loaf, suggested a location in managua for recovery / rehabilitation / redemption.
gulley side:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyf8l9icxbu&feature=related
driving to the "gulley side" we shared conversation void radio. isg senior member is a fine gentleman that i enjoy "hacer amistad" (ie. making friendship with.)
not knowing the exact location from our entry-point, we found the location after rolling the streets of managua's ghetto. the locals in managua discourage the patronage of this sector. machetazos, chizas, cuetes, cuchillos y lanzamordelos are the chosen resources for occupational endeavors (ie. robbery; kidnapping; assasinations) and dispute resoultion (ie. arbitration; court; calling the police.)
transferring my usa-education of the street to nicaragua, we backed the suv into its parking space. why back-in when parking? to drive-off without having to maneuver the car. secondly, the first person to reach the car wins the fight: in the car is where the guns are held and the first person to reach the car to retrieve their cuete (ie. gun) will win the fight!
¡god bless america!
departing the car, isg senior member double-checked that his car doors were locked. awaiting our entry were approximately ten (10) hungry a*s wh*res! saying "hola" to the doorman, we entered. i had two (2) hieñas on my arms, but the "grande chele" (ie. big white guy; gringo) had five (5) ¡buey puta (ie. son of a b*tch!)
overwhelmed by the competitive greeting, isg senior member entered the establishment slowly. at all times he was checking his pockets as to ensure he still maintained possession of his wallet. me too, shit! finally, they entered the brothel.
these hoes attempted to separate isg senior member from meat loaf, but i didn't allow it! on the lap of isg senior member were two (2) chicas nicas with 1-hoe on each arm and 1-hoe on each foot. isg senior member, gringo (ie. your peer,) had more than he could handle!
i, meat loaf, had 1-hoe on each arm as i attempted to place the burden of "me invata" upon the "white guy." no tengo reales: el gringo me invita. demographics!
"big pimping" were the mental, physical, and emotional sentiments of isg senior member.
watching him in paradiso (ie. paradise,) i journey to the bathroom to [CodeWord111] (http://isgprohibitedwords.info?CodeWord=CodeWord111). running behind me were the two (2) chicas that sat alongside me on the sofa. they entered the men's bathroom with no fear, 0% fear. the followed me to the urinal. i instructed the girls to hold my d*ck for urination. one girl held the shaft and the other held my balls! ¡meat loaf!
after my d*ck was drained of [CodeWord109] (http://isgprohibitedwords.info?CodeWord=CodeWord109), she shook my droppings as to ensure my "meat loaf" was suitable for re-entry. (i guess it didn't hurt that i was "free balling" due to the expensive cost of laundry services in granada.)
i returned to the sofa to supervise the "attempted fleecing" of isg senior member.
getting "charged-up" from the attention received, isg senior member bought five (5) girls five (5) beers valued at us $5 each.
the girls were fighting / competing for their opportunity to relieve "milk his leche." i, meat loaf, attempted to protect isg senior member from a guaranteed fleecing if he were to enter solo: entering this location without the presence of meat loaf is "dañino para la salud" (ie. bad for your health.)
as part of the beer purchase, the girls agreed / offered to enter the bedroom with isg senior member and give him a blowjob as compensation for the beer purchase.
to "double-check" his money, isg senior member, went to the bathroom. as they did i, the chicas followed isg senior member into the bathroom for aide. within the bathroom were 5 -7 chicas awaiting and assisting isg senior member with his bodily functions.
knowing that isg senior member wanted to revisar (ie. investigate) his "cash," i went into the bathroom to control the hoes.
(understand, 100% spanish-speaking ability is required to explore nicaragua, and especially managua. demographics matter too!)
while at the urinal, una chica grabbed the d*ck of isg senior member so he could [CodeWord140] (http://isgprohibitedwords.info?CodeWord=CodeWord140)! isg senior member placed his hands upon his head in relaxation.
in the hallway to the bathroom were two (2) waitresses watching the "man-ipulation." the "man toy" was in "full-effect." being treated a "piece of d*ck" is / was the feeling received by isg senior member and i, meat loaf.
isg senior member returned to sala and went to enter the bathroom, but only after he verified la cuenta (ie. the check / bill.) he was at us $75. isg senior member informed me of his intentions not to get fleeced and "played" on the bill, so i utilized my master's degree education which was completed 100% in spanish for the transference of intent.
isg senior member was in the bedroom with five (5) chicas who had agreed / contracted to suck his d*ck as compensation for the beverage!
i, meat loaf, was at the cashier attempting to f*ck the cashier of 40-years and the waitress of bluefields lineage. i grabbed more a*s than a toilet seat and held more butts than an ashtray.
to protect isg senior member from these aggressive and hungry hoes, i entered the bedroom. upon entrance isg senior member was startled as he was 100% "buck / butt naked." isg senior member was swinging more "bat" than barry bonds, and without the drugs. the five (5) hoes were topless.
as i've detailed on other meat loaf posts, all women need direction and guidance otherwise they are liable to get confused and disillusioned!
isg senior member began receiving his blowjob from two (2) hoes, but the other three (3) were sitting on opposite sofas with clothes on. i ended that nonsense and put a hoe in a hoe's place!
meat loaf instructed the all five (5) hoes to get "butt / buck naked" as was isg senior member!
meat loaf instructed all five (5) hoes to "hacer la fila / cola" (ie. get in line) for their turn at sucking the d*ck of isg senior member!
meat loaf evaluated the skills of each d*ck-sucker's ability. meat loaf pointed and guided the four (4) chicas as to good d*ck sucking techniques.
one chica had bad performance and was instructed to "get back in line," which she did! http://dancingbear.com/t1/pps=dig5x/home.htm
with one chupadora (ie. d*ck suker) eating his d*ck, isg senior member had four (4) other waiting in line behind her. at the feet of isg senior member were four (4) chicas waiting for their turn to suck d*ck as compensation for a us $5 beer.
pushing the envelope, meat loaf instructed the four (4) girls waiting in line to suck the toes of isg senior member. one chica jumped on his right big toe faster than she did his d*ck. another chupadora who bragged about sucking d*ck in guatemala began to lick the sole of isg senior member's left-foot!
butt / buck naked were five (5) chicas, in line, to suck the d*ck of isg senior member. it cannot be understated that i, meat loaf, created / made this happen. had it not been for meat loaf's escort to said location, the game could have gotten "gulley side."
when the time ran out, the waitress enter the bedroom for another round of larceny. i put the hoe in check! i told the b*tch to "pay her way" with some p*ssy sales. she smiled and wanted to, but.....
isg senior member went back into his wallet as all "good gringoes" do!
isg senior member bought five (5) more beers at the expense of us $25. isg senior member informed me that one (1) chica had to leave due to her talking too much and not sucking enough d*ck. i, meat loaf, kicked the b*tch out of the bedroom. the other four (4) chicas knew we were serious and wanted good service.
two (2) chicas bragged and held pride in their ability to suck d*ck. the other two (2) stated that they have only been working (ie. sucking d*ck and f*cking) for two (2) weeks and they will improve. i told each girl to get alongside the girl that was sucking isg senior member's d*ck for lessons and instruction.
the spinner had serious d*ck sucking skills as evidenced by isg senior member saying, "oooh!"
big chops attempted to fight with the spinner for turn at sucking d*ck.
in my opinion, the spinner had better delivery in sucking d*ck than big chops.
after the second beer (ie. 30-minutes,) isg senior member and i departed the bedroom. at the table we sat with the spinner i obtained the telephone number and hours of availability of the the spinner as to offer employment. the spinner is a cool person and simply enjoys f*cking and getting f*cked! what's wrong with that?
[b]the spinner[b] offered isg senior member a 1-on-1, but isg senior member was drained of leche! i offered to pay for isg senior member, but he opted-out. i, meat loaf, took her up on the offer.
the spinner and i entered the bedroom. she assumed the position: she assumed her role. with d*ck that resembles a 12-ounce beverage, she commenced. talented she is / was / will be.
with condom on, i told her that i wanted "vicho." she jumped on the meat loaf like a cowgirl in granada's hipico. she rode the d*ck for a while, but i wasn't able to get 100% inside of her womb. instead, i stood-up and started f*cking her standing-up. she slide up-and-down on my shaft as a "chevy piston." her petite frame made f*cking her standing-up enjoyable and fun, but with time ticking and 4-hours of leche, i need to squirt. in doggy-style she assumed. i beat the p*ssy like l.a.p.d. versus rodney king! i had to hurry-up 'cause someone order some fish that was starting to marinade.
departing the bedroom with her smiling and meat loaf a little tired from tossing around 110-pounds of d*ck sucking power; toe-sucking power; standing-up power; cowgirl riding power; and doggy-style power. i was spent!
isg senior member shared conversation with big chops who offered her lover / girlfriend of 18-years as compensation for another us $5 beer. isg senior member obtained the contact information.
the two (2) isg senior members departed the "gulley side" for the gringo-friendly confines of "fenix." as i departed, two (2) beer bottles were placed into my pants for the five (5) thugs that entered and were "mean mugging." with gordas (ie. baseball hats) turned in every direction and other signs of delicuencia (ie. criminal activity) they sat. with the gringo, i rolled. prepared and ready, the bottles served as the carretera para a dios.
isg senior member got busted by the five (5) d*ck suckers and had to go re-load at the atm (ie. cajero automatico.) isg senior member spent about us $200 for the six-hour experience. isg senior member was more in shock of the compensation received from a us $5 beer than anything else. isg senior member was more shocked by what simple instruction like, "chupe los dedos" (ie. suck those toes) can do than a lack of instruction. isg senior member was more in shock of how the five (5) girls stood in line to suck his d*ck and when one was instructed to return to the end of line for a better performance, she did!
gringo-friendly confines
upon entering fenix, i was a meat loaf staple for the past three (3) years. isg senior member saw a staple of his: immediately upon entrance isg senior member went to bedroom abandoning meat loaf with twenty (20) prostitutes watching six (6) televisions of pornography.
i shared conversation with the staple, while isg senior member was in the air-conditioned room. i too ventured into a bedroom.
1-hour later, isg senior member and i, depart "fenix" and make our way along carretera masaya in view of the streetwalkers. approximately twenty (20) streetwalkers lined the street as if it were trash collection day.
40-minutes later, isg senior member and i arrive at parque central de granada. returning to my 3,000 sq. foot mansion encompassing three (3) stories located on nicaragua most valuable real estate, i was accosted by a male-homosexual prostitute. at 3 a.m. he was looking for some twink to eat and earn. i detailed my evening to him as i am doing to you. he wished he liked fish and sausage. we said goodbye and i returned to the mansion.
entering the mansion i went to the second floor bedrooms. i walked into the bedroom of "my live-in." i spread her legs wide open and gave her a polvo.
this is / was simply another day in the life of meat loaf: this is / was / will be a lifelong memory for isg senior member who asked not to be named due to isg lurker harassment. hacer amistad allowed isg senior member to experience the "gulley side."
advisory: it's not the dollar amount, but the person litigating or doing the negotiations. don't think that you will have a similar experience! why? demographics, knowledge, and delivery: understand, i'm among my peers of wh*res, pimps, and players! and i have decades on the "gulley side" which translates when conversing with those residents of the "gulley side."
* this was a long report. *
Two weeks ago I was having a beverage at one of the cars lining la Calzada. Walking by was a "burgesita" who appeared to be a "normal girl." I spit game at the b*tch and received her phone number and home address.
With two (2) bedrooms empty, I called the hoe at 0730 hrs. She came over at 1400 hours with two (2) "hoe-workers."
Upon entering "the mansion," I gave the "rats" C$200 to go purchase beer at the tienda del rincon (ie. corner store.) To my surprise the three putas returned with three (3) liters of beer and my C$95 de vuelto (ie. change.)
All three (3) hoes sat alongside "Me Loaf" at the executive desk. My staff continued with their daily occupational endeavors.
Chistes, bromas, and other elementary conversation was held between the executive desk occupants. (In Nicaragua, almost 100% of your conversations will be elementary or frivolous or lacking quality or superficial or nonsense. Your only salvation for "real" or adult or mature conversation are other foreigners like yourself. It's tough existence for we intelligencia.)
After 1-hour of "Me Loaf" telling the hoes that I'm pinche. After 1-hour of "Me Loaf" telling the hoes I don't P4P. After 1-hour of "Me Loaf" telling the hoes that I reside soltero sin compromiso y que soy el presidente de una corporativa estadounidense que dar prestamos del negocio, the b*tches were counting my reales.
Eventually, they showed their true colors: Putas Orgullosa (ie. prostitutes with pride.)
One tramp had a bullsh*t tramp stamp and flat ass. The b*tch is a 5 - 6.
The "leader of the pack" is a 7, but shows years of usage on her rostro (ie. face.) The last b*tch is a 5 - 6. The only b*tch worth a polvo is the "leader of the pack" for she had a nice ass and slender body for penetration.
So the "tramps stamp" quoted a price of US $30 per polvo. I told all them hoes that they are not worthy. I told all them hoes that anybody paying those prices is a "bobo." I told all them hoes that sucker a*s Gringos are indeed suckers. I told all them hoes that they "got the game f*cked up."
'Dem hoes told me that everything costs in life! 'Dem hoes told me that all Granadinas charge for "p*ssy access." 'Dem hoes told me that it's 100% P4P in Granada.
'Dem hoes crazy, "Kapitan Kreme."
After two (2) hours of entertaining these worthless-a*s, stank a*s, rudy poot a*s b*tches, they departed the mansion to roam the streets in search of prey.
On the calzada I saw them hoes strolling for chumps! I said "hola" and kept my lana (ie. money) in my pockets where it belongs.
1. Granada is nothing more than 1 - 3 day tourists operating on their last dollar after Costa Rican vacation.
2. Granada is nothing more than 1 street, la Calzada, with 20 restaurants and bars.
3. Granada is nothing more than 95% of the Gringo resident population being retired and aged 53 - 78.
4. Granada is nothing more than a few Gringa residents chasing "Latin Lovers" or "Boy Toys" 20-years their junior. They show their "Latin Lovers" off like newly purchased puppies.
5. Granada is nothing more backpackers residing for 1 - 3 days at hostels (ie. flop houses,) as they travel Central America.
6. Granada is nothing more than the retirees purchasing streetwalker p*ssy.
7. Granada is nothing more than a place to meet and converse with other Gringo residents of Nicaragua.
8. Granada is nothing more than local Chicas Nicas confused on the value of a dollar and accustom to charging sucker a*s Gringo tourists US $30 - $40 per polvo.
9. Granada is nothing more than Nicaraguans accustom to "Good Samaritan" Gringos dishing out donations and other regalos for "feel good" sentiments.
10. Granada is 100% BULLSHIT and beyond point number 7, it's the weakest place I've ever resided despite living in a mansion located along Nicaragua's #1 real estate market!
Despite Meat Loaf living "High on the Hog," it's hard to shine with no electricity and no water to wash your a*s.
8 hours without the above, and I lost a full-day of North American production to pay for the life abroad.
Nica Bound
09-22-09, 04:32
Los Conejos club and adjacent casino has re-opened in Matagalpa. Onsite and take out services available. Few local gals but most are from Managua and live at club when working. Selection is adequate but with a bit of financial support from you the place might actually survive, thrive and motivate "tourists" to visit northern and much cooler Nicaragua.
Located immediately on right side of main road into town, about 2 km before la primera entrada a Matagalpa.
Since the USA went bust due to Americans spending more than their incomes, the donations have dried-up in Nicaragua. Therefore, the crime has increased.
Gringos are getting jacked at the ATM! Gringos are getting jacked at their homes! Gringos are getting jacked in their cars! Gringos are getting jacked as they visit the tourist attractions! Gringos are paying extortion fees as to not become the next victim, again!
The "Gringo Friendly Confines" of Granada are no longer friendly. Gringos have teamed-up and are running the streets with thugs wielding machetes (ie. 2 foot knives) and cuetes (ie. guns) to protect their assets!
Are you prepared for 100% independence? The state of Granada has 180,000 residents and 170 police officers!
Who will save you: Who are you going to call, "Ghostbusters"?
SpaceChimp
10-12-09, 22:32
The last time I was in Estelí I was told by a cabby that there is a club south of town on the west side of the careterra between La Trinidad and Estelí. He said there was on site action but I unfortunately didn't have time to check it out myself. I'll be heading back in the next month or so and I hope to have a full report for you guys. Until then, has anybody come across this place before?
Happy mongering
Sc
Granada, Nicaragua, Central America, analysis revisited:
Appendix:
#2. Many of the restaurants and bars have closed / gone out of business due to a lack of profitability and customers. Lesson 1, you cannot make a profit in the restaurant / bar businesses. Your profit margin on beer is C $3 - C$ 7 / US $0.15 - 0.35 cents per beer. Your profit margin on food is 30%.
#3. The majority of Gringo residents are retired US Military.
#4. Young Gringas "fall in love" / financially support via Western Union their "tour guides."
1. Granada is nothing more than 1 - 3 day tourists operating on their last dollar after Costa Rican vacation.
2. Granada is nothing more than 1 street, la Calzada, with 20 restaurants and bars.
3. Granada is nothing more than 95% of the Gringo resident population being retired and aged 53 - 78.
4. Granada is nothing more than a few Gringa residents chasing "Latin Lovers" or "Boy Toys" 20-years their junior. They show their "Latin Lovers" off like newly purchased puppies.
5. Granada is nothing more backpackers residing for 1 - 3 days at hostels (ie. flop houses,) as they travel Central America.
6. Granada is nothing more than the retirees purchasing streetwalker p*ssy.
7. Granada is nothing more than a place to meet and converse with other Gringo residents of Nicaragua.
8. Granada is nothing more than local Chicas Nicas confused on the value of a dollar and accustom to charging sucker a*s Gringo tourists US $30 - $40 per polvo.
9. Granada is nothing more than Nicaraguans accustom to "Good Samaritan" Gringos dishing out donations and other regalos for "feel good" sentiments.
10. Granada is 100% BULLSHIT and beyond point number 7, it's the weakest place I've ever resided despite living in a mansion located along Nicaragua's #1 real estate market!
Granada is a village!
Granada has an inner-city population of 40,000.
The Gringo-population of Granada lives / passes through / visits within a four (4)- block area stemming from the Cathedral / Parque Central down the Calzada until the Lago Cocibolca. Two (2) blocks in one direction and four (4) blocks in the other direction from the Calzada are the boundaries.
Within this four (4) block area will be your community (ie. Gringo; English-speakers.)
You will see the same people everyday; you will hear your daily activities repeated to you everyday; you will be a member of the community.
Granada is a village.
With tourism almost dry, the street kids (ie. homeless; panhandlers) ranging in age from four (4) years to twelve (12) are harassing the Gringo-residents.
Normally, they harass the tourists and the dumb-a8s tourists give them money, for nothing. With the mentality that all Gringos have money, they accost the Gringo-residents.
I had to fight through seven (7) street kids within a 1.5 block distance as I carried a "hamburger and fries" carryout. I kept my hands in my pocket as to not become a victim of petty cash and house keys.
Below is a breakdown of the citizenships / passports of the English-speakers in Granada, Nicaragua, Central America, as experienced.
Resident Foreigners
United Kingdom
United States of America
Canada
Netherlands
Tourists
South Africa
Costa Rica
United States of America
Canada
United Kingdom
Australia
Netherlands
Argentina
There are also plenty of Mexican Residents.
There are also plenty of German and Israeli Tourists.
With Nicaragua being broke! With Granada being broke due to a lack of "Good Hearted Gringos." With Granada being broke due to a lack of tourist, I've heard that one can get a blowj*b in Parque Central for C$ 50 / US $ 2.50, BARE BACK.
My associate got his "Jimmie Waxed" the other day for C$ 40 / US $ 2.
Last night, I was returning to my mansion and was confronted by a twink. This twink knows my name and fame for several months. He's a male prostitute. He was with a chamaca (ie. girl.) He asked me for C$ 40 / US $ 2 so that they could go to the night club. I told him that his female friend could suck my d*ck for C $50 / US $ 2. I told her to suck some d*ck for C $50 / US $ 2.
She quoted US $30. I told that b*tch to get real, C$ 50. She replied with C$ 100 / US $ 5. I vollied, C$ 60 / US $ 3. She stated, C$ 100 / US$ 5.
I, the chamaca, and the twink walked to my mansion. In front of the mansion were two (2) neighbors. The three of us entered the mansion.
Upon entering the mansion their eyes got BIG. My sala (ie. living room) has 30-foot ceilings. She kicked off her sandals, grabbed a pillow, and began sucking Meat Loaf d*ck. She chewed my beef for about ten (10) minutes and complained that I don't shoot loads fast: She complained that she had a real d*ck in her presence; in her mouth. I allowed her and the twink to leave and I went to bed.
I was more curious on how much a BBBJCIM cost versus actual results.
(I can get BBBJCIM in the USA for free walking down the street!)
tourist season is approaching and the sight of more gringo tourists has made the natives restless. with many granadinos loosing their jobs and many more having 0% aspiration to obtain agency, the crime has risen.
this is how it works: the campesinos (ie. farmers) live outside of the city limits. some, but not many commute into granada city limits for employment and return back to their farm domicile. the residents of granada proper stay within the city limits. the international tourists stay within city limits- a 4 block radius. so, the campesinos come to granada city limits to steal and rob the tourists and employed nicaraguans.
at a restaurant on the calzada with a few gringos, the business owner, and some french female tourists, everything was pleasant.
entering the establishment was a nicaraguan male of stout stature. his wardrobe consisted of a nba sports jersey and blue jeans with tennis shoes.
he appeared to possess 28 - 40 years of age. his skin tone was brown.
the assailant walked up to bar where three gringos shared adult beverages alongside the gringo owner. overlooking the gringos was a chico nica waiter and waitress. the assailant spoke with the owner in what appeared to be a business transaction. and then...
the assailant walked towards the door and before leaving he turned around, went inside of his shirt and pants, and brandished a machete with 3-foot blade hidden inside of his clothing!
machetazo.
he brandished a 3-foot machete and the bar cleared out. to his immediate left was a table of four (4) french female tourists who hauled a*s into the rear of the restaurant. the three (3) gringos sitting at the bar began charging the assailant. the gringo owner charged at the assailant. all gringos held bar stools as shields while they attempted to chase the assailant outside of the restaurant.
the assailant went into the street, la calzada, with his 3-foot machete waving through the machete in the air. the assailant threw chairs at the patrons of restaurant and attempted to re-gain entry. tourists, nicaraguans, and the proprietor shielded the door from the assailant. the restaurant security guard observed all in a non-interested demeanor.
feeling stronger than united states iron ore, the assailant threw a beer bottle of liter volume at a bystander. the victim, gringo owner of the restaurant, was struck by glass particles and suffered lacerations on his (1) throat, (2) temple, (3) chin, and (4) neck. the victim of gringo citizenship poured more blood than "count dracula."
as the patrons of nicaragua's #1 tourist attraction, la calzada, granada, "hauled a*s", the assailant meandered for 1-block. por fin, the "tourist police" arrived to converse with the 3-foot machete wielding assailant. hesitantly, one police officer confronted the assailant with requests while his female partner reluctantly pulled her gun. the male officer confirep001ed the 3-foot machete.
talking with the assailant, the male officer "patted him down." the assailant was not instructed to lay down on the sidewalk nor was he placed into handcuffs! two (2) police pick-up trucks arrived on the scene and the assailant boarded into the bed of the pick-up for transport to jail.
the assailant vowed to return to commit murder against the restaurateur!
charges recommended
1-count of carrying a concealed weapon.
10-counts of brandishing a deadly weapon.
1-count of aggravated assault.
1-count of aggravated attempted murder.
8-counts of damage to property.
as detailed in previous posts, the usa would have shot the assailant especially if non-white. for some reason, the nicaraguan police do not shoot. and as i've said before, nobody will help you and they will grateful that it's not them being victimized and also enjoy the show.
do you still want to visit nicaragua? how about visiting the #1 tourist attraction, la calzada, granada?
* the proper way to use a machete is in a north-to-south direction at a 45-degree angle. therefore, your head, shoulders, and upper torso is what will be chopped off or mutilated. *
i invite you to visit nicaragua: the cost of entry into nicaragua is cheap, but the maintenance is costly.
this p*ssy access is not / aint cheap!
Nica Bound
11-08-09, 16:44
Real Nice posting, M.L. !
That ought to help keep any tourists with money out of Central America.
May be you could give us a shot by shot rundown on the Fort Hood military base shooting too !
A bit more factual information about the four French females encountered would certainly be more helpful to ISG.
---
Generous Gent
11-10-09, 11:22
Way off on this one; regardless of your opinion, this is a post definitely worth reporting. Some of us like living on the edge, but a machete attack is one edge we all hope to avoid.
And for sure, as in practically all Latin countries, he will indeed return to keep his promise.
Real Nice posting, M.L. !
That ought to help keep any tourists with money out of Central America.
May be you could give us a shot by shot rundown on the Fort Hood military base shooting too !
A bit more factual information about the four French females encountered would certainly be more helpful to ISG.
---
Nica Bound
11-10-09, 23:29
Way off on this one; regardless of your opinion, this is a post definitely worth reporting. Some of us like living on the edge, but a machete attack is one edge we all hope to avoid.
And for sure, as in practically all Latin countries, he will indeed return to keep his promise.
Hi Generous,
Perhaps you have been a very regular reader of Loaf and then must certainly be aware of the highly suspect fictitious nature of many of his messages. And after reading this story of a machete assault, he also posts an image of a blood covered machete, though the assailant from his tale never made machete contact with any body part. But the image adds a nice sensationalistic touch.
Having shared cervezas with the Loaf, I can attest to his high entertainment value and am jealous of his skill in crafting literary fiction. And only wish that he would write books of the stuff !
But yes, wholeheartedly agree that no one wishes to be on receiving end of this kind of edge.
----
At 0630 the internet went out of service. I went to the office at 1000 hours. They told me that they are experiencing problems.
I lost 1-day of G8 production!
Nicaragua is costly.
tourist season is approaching and the sight of more gringo tourists has made the natives restless. with many granadinos loosing their jobs and many more having 0% aspiration to obtain agency, the crime has risen.
this is how it works: the campesinos (ie. farmers) live outside of the city limits. some, but not many commute into granada city limits for employment and return back to their farm domicile. the residents of granada proper stay within the city limits. the international tourists stay within city limits- a 4 block radius. so, the campesinos come to granada city limits to steal and rob the tourists and employed nicaraguans.
at a restaurant on the calzada with a few gringos, the business owner, and some french female tourists, everything was pleasant.
entering the establishment was a nicaraguan male of stout stature. his wardrobe consisted of a nba sports jersey and blue jeans with tennis shoes.
he appeared to possess 28 - 40 years of age. his skin tone was brown.
the assailant walked up to bar where three gringos shared adult beverages alongside the gringo owner. overlooking the gringos was a chico nica waiter and waitress. the assailant spoke with the owner in what appeared to be a business transaction. and then...
the assailant walked towards the door and before leaving he turned around, went inside of his shirt and pants, and brandished a machete with 3-foot blade hidden inside of his clothing!
machetazo.
he brandished a 3-foot machete and the bar cleared out. to his immediate left was a table of four (4) french female tourists who hauled a*s into the rear of the restaurant. the three (3) gringos sitting at the bar began charging the assailant. the gringo owner charged at the assailant. all gringos held bar stools as shields while they attempted to chase the assailant outside of the restaurant.
the assailant went into the street, la calzada, with his 3-foot machete waving through the machete in the air. the assailant threw chairs at the patrons of restaurant and attempted to re-gain entry. tourists, nicaraguans, and the proprietor shielded the door from the assailant. the restaurant security guard observed all in a non-interested demeanor.
feeling stronger than united states iron ore, the assailant threw a beer bottle of liter volume at a bystander. the victim, gringo owner of the restaurant, was struck by glass particles and suffered lacerations on his (1) throat, (2) temple, (3) chin, and (4) neck. the victim of gringo citizenship poured more blood than "count dracula."
as the patrons of nicaragua's #1 tourist attraction, la calzada, granada, "hauled a*s", the assailant meandered for 1-block. por fin, the "tourist police" arrived to converse with the 3-foot machete wielding assailant. hesitantly, one police officer confronted the assailant with requests while his female partner reluctantly pulled her gun. the male officer confirep001ed the 3-foot machete.
talking with the assailant, the male officer "patted him down." the assailant was not instructed to lay down on the sidewalk nor was he placed into handcuffs! two (2) police pick-up trucks arrived on the scene and the assailant boarded into the bed of the pick-up for transport to jail.
the assailant vowed to return to commit murder against the restaurateur!
charges recommended
1-count of carrying a concealed weapon.
10-counts of brandishing a deadly weapon.
1-count of aggravated assault.
1-count of aggravated attempted murder.
8-counts of damage to property.
as detailed in previous posts, the usa would have shot the assailant especially if non-white. for some reason, the nicaraguan police do not shoot. and as i've said before, nobody will help you and they will grateful that it's not them being victimized and also enjoy the show.
do you still want to visit nicaragua? how about visiting the #1 tourist attraction, la calzada, granada?
* the proper way to use a machete is in a north-to-south direction at a 45-degree angle. therefore, your head, shoulders, and upper torso is what will be chopped off or mutilated. *
i invite you to visit nicaragua: the cost of entry into nicaragua is cheap, but the maintenance is costly.
this p*ssy access is not / aint cheap!
if you don't police your person, nobody else will. the attacker of ten (10) with machete and destroyer of us $1,000 in property is walking the "gringo friendly confines." gringos have money; they can afford to re-purchase the damaged items. for if jobs existed, the attacker would have been too tired from work to chop-up tourists. rumor has it that he has a mental illness, no pun intended.
although he threatened to "chop me up" for encouraging the police to shoot him, i aint never scared.
send some protection for meat loaf otherwise these posts may cease, seriously.
It must be Christmas time because the past 1-week has been lleno with Granadinas prostituting / asking for money! These Chicas Nicas are walking the streets; making house calls to neighbors; loitering on street corners; and telling more "woe is me" stories.
Last week, I posted about the girl who came to my house for US $2.50 to feed her lifetime liabilities. She came over about four (4) times and got US $0 / C$0. Needless to say, I saw her on the street yesterday and she ignored me. Good job Meat Loaf.
On Saturday, I was at a neighborhood restaurant when some middle-aged Granadina walked by and waved at me. "Who the f*ck is this" was my response. I invited her to enter the restaurant and indulge in a glass of "tap water." (I aint spending any money on these hoes. They can drink "tap water" and if they want to be fancy simply add a lime twist.) In typical Chica Nica style, the middle-age female came back 30-minutes later. In typical fashion, she came with another female. (1-Chica Nica = 2-Chica Nicas = You (ie. Gringo) are paying for three (3) people.) I told her to drink a glass of water and they refused. Leaving the restaurant in disgust were their emotions. Good job Meat Loaf.
On Monday, I was in my mansion. Two (2) females walked by waving and smiling at me. I told them hoes to enter the mansion, but only after they were frisked by security. Within minutes she started talking the Nicaragua sales presentation. "I need money; I want a pizza; there are no jobs in Nicaragua; I'm moving to Costa Rica to work; I'm looking for a Gringo; only Gringos live good in Nicaragua" were the themes. Knowing what these hoes were saying, I held strong. I didn't fall for the "okie doke" and eventually told them hoes to leave. In typical Chica Nica fashion one girl returned. I told her why are you traveling in packs: You can't make any money "hooking" in pairs of two. When she returned, she asked for US $4. I told her hell no and she left again, for good. Good job Meat Loaf.
On Monday, I was in my mansion. Two (2) females walked by waving and staring at a P.I.M.P. I told the chubby hoe to enter the mansion. "Chubby Checker" said within 120-seconds that she needed some money. I asked how much. She replied US $25. I told her that is way too much for her, "Chubby Checker." I asked how many children she has. She stated that she has 1-child of 9-months. I asked if she had "tittie milk." She replied yes. I told her to s*ck my d*ck for free. She said no. I told her that she gave the "baby's daddy" the p*ssy for free; he is not around to financially support them; so why should I pay for p*ssy since she gives it out for free. I told her that p*ssy is free: P*ssy does not need to be inventoried. It's not a perishable product that requires a supply loan to acquire. It's free. "Her sister" entered the mansion. I asked if she wanted to suck some d*ck since "her sister" was bullsh*tting. They both replied no. They requested any amount approaching US $25. I told them hoes no and that they had to go. "Chubby Checker" asked when she could come back to the mansion and I replied when the p*ssy is free! Good job Meat Loaf.
Meat Loaf fends off the bombardment of Granadinas looking for some "Christmas Change." Meat Loaf does not pay for p*ssy. P*ssy is free!
I did a 4 weeks trip in Central America. The main focus was not mongering, but I prepared myself anyway in reading WSG about Central America. Actually there is not too much info here aside from Costa Rica. So I had to discover also a little bit myself. Here my contribution to the board for Nigaragua.
After some days in Ometepe I decided to hit San Juan for a couple days. Nice place with nice beach restaurants and quite some American tourists.
Tried my luck for sexo near the river about 3 buildings after the Disco at about noon. When I passed on the road and looked around I spot a girl in a backyard waving at me. So I went in and started to talk with the 3 girls. Beer was offered but the girls didn’t ask for drinks. The media hora was quoted for 20 USD. After making sure that I get, what I want (BBBJ) I went with Tatiana, a 20 year old Nica, a bit cubby, but a nice face. The cabins are very basic, with only a fan, no water. Tatiana brought a bowl with water to clean my private parts. After we both stripped she started right away with the BBBJ, which was quite good, followed by some other stuff.
Since this house seemed to be the only chica casa I went there again in the late afternoon and asked about TLN with Tatiana. First I was quoted 80 USD, but finally the deal was closed at 50 USD . I was told to come back at 8.30 pm to get her. When I arrived I had to show my passport and to let them now my Hotel. It seems, that TLN was not common there and Papasan also a little bit afraid. The money went to him and off we went to my apartment in Irish house. Once in the room we stripped off and went together to the shower. She cleaned me and I cleaned her. I gave her a toothbrush in order to have also her mouth clean for the things to come.
Then we started with DFK, BBBJ, DATY and fucking in every possible position. She got quite wet but I was not able to have her come. Our first session lasted at least two hour until I finally came. We did another nice session in the morning that ended with BBBJ CIM. No complains from her side.
It seems they don’t have too many customers there, since she told me I was the only one. She left me happy and satisfied at about 7 am.
Please open only if you don't mind to see a cock
An English major planning a thesis could do worse than studying Meat Loaf's writing. His style is not unique: We have experienced his kind onf the Thailand and Philippines boards. Such writers, if they are good, the can be entertaining, but if they are bad you soon grow tired of their fantasy realism.
It seems to me that Meat Loaf is still trying to refine his style. The flow needs perfecting. But these are minor things. This dude show some promise.
That is one big ass diamond ring on Tatiana's finger. OK ... simulated diamond. Did she take you home to meet the hubby? Can't remember when I saw a barrio girl actually wearing a diamond. Real or not.
An English major planning a thesis could do worse than studying Meat Loaf's writing. His style is not unique: We have experienced his kind on the Thailand and Philippines boards. Such writers, if they are good, the can be entertaining, but if they are bad you soon grow tired of their fantasy realism.
It seems to me that Meat Loaf is still trying to refine his style. The flow needs perfecting. But these are minor things. This dude show some promise.
Vittu,
They sure could do worse than my writing. I was told early in high school about my writing talents and then again in undergraduate studies. Not until I took the GRE / GMAT did I elevate my prose. And then it was for my law school applications: It was during my USA law school applications that my writing tremendously increased or at least my confidence.
Thus far, I have three (3) works in the USA Library of Congress. I also have writings in the my state's legislature and other professional duties.
I sure hope my writings are entertainment.
All of my ISG postings are first-drafts with very little before-thought.
Thanks for the compliment, I think....
Hey Riggo,
Sumart posted pictures. At least someone on the Nicaragua board posts pictures. Thanks Sumart.
I know that I'm not suppose to criticize the photos, but.......
Tourist season starts about one or two weeks before Thanksgiving and is a very festive time of year. Lots of national patrias are held during December and the city is temporarily over-run with Gringos on 1 - 3 day stints.
"Chocha Monger" is inducted into the "Managua Mongering Hall of Fame!" Congratulations.
Although it is not evidenced that "Chocha Monger" has every stepped foot onto the soil of Nicaragua, he is nonetheless inducted. Why?
"Chocha Monger" knows Latin America! "Chocha Monger" knows how the populace and how "Chicas Nicas" manipulate Gringos. "Chocha Monger" knows how the males think and behave. "Chocha Monger" knows too much about Nicaragua and Latin America.
"Chocha Monger" knows how not to pull caballo which in itself is priceless. While other Gringos loose their faculties, "Chocha Monger" watches their demise.
"Chocha Monger" has guided ignorant Gringos for years via International Sex Forumn. These Gringos have been domesticated caballos as well as USA exported caballos.
"Chocha Monger's" list of accomplishments is legendary and his posting history is superb. While other ISG posters write dribble, "Chocha Monger" writes information that is actually useful.
"Chocha Monger" is inducted into the "Managua Mongering Hall of Fame" and joins the ranks of "DrDewman," and "Grand Pollo."
Congratulations "Chocha Monger" for your induction and keep up the stellar postings on ISG.
"Chocha Monger" is inducted into the "Managua Mongering Hall of Fame."
in granada, the gringos that retire here or attempt to become part-time residents cannot speak spanish. hence, they have an extremely limited world of english-speakers. in nicaragua, your peers are nothing like your peers in g8!
so, when the sh*t hits the fan, the gringos run to the "thug" they know. deported persons are your nicaraguan peers, but they have a resume of failure as evidenced by their incarceration and deported status from the usa.
the deported are those that were convicted and served state / federal prison time for (1) guns and / or (2) drugs. all because you serve and survived a prison bid does not equate to credible street skills! nonetheless, when a gringo gets in peril they seek the assistance of a "rent a gangster."
the "rent a gangster" has 0% intention / aspiration on fulfilling the contract you hire him / her to perform. instead, it's payback: it's payback for the prison bid and the deported status. you have come to "our" / "their" home-country. instead, they will take your money with a smile and never fulfill on the "hit" or "job" for which you hired the "rent a gangster."
advice: you cannot trust a "rent a gangster" beyond the beer you share in a public establishment! anything more places you in peril. game changed: you think "white usa" while they think "minority usa" and "deported nicaraguan." you have 0% chance.
take the streets into your hand with a licensed concealed carry handgun and no fear in its use! otherwise, you will call "rent a gangster" at some point, to no avail.
Chocha Monger
12-19-09, 02:19
in granada, the gringos that retire here or attempt to become part-time residents cannot speak spanish. hence, they have an extremely limited world of english-speakers. in nicaragua, your peers are nothing like your peers in g8!
so, when the sh*t hits the fan, the gringos run to the "thug" they know. deported persons are your nicaraguan peers, but they have a resume of failure as evidenced by their incarceration and deported status from the usa.
the deported are those that were convicted and served state / federal prison time for (1) guns and / or (2) drugs. all because you serve and survived a prison bid does not equate to credible street skills! nonetheless, when a gringo gets in peril they seek the assistance of a "rent a gangster."
the "rent a gangster" has 0% intention / aspiration on fulfilling the contract you hire him / her to perform. instead, it's payback: it's payback for the prison bid and the deported status. you have come to "our" / "their" home-country. instead, they will take your money with a smile and never fulfill on the "hit" or "job" for which you hired the "rent a gangster."
advice: you cannot trust a "rent a gangster" beyond the beer you share in a public establishment! anything more places you in peril. game changed: you think "white usa" while they think "minority usa" and "deported nicaraguan." you have 0% chance.
take the streets into your hand with a licensed concealed carry handgun and no fear in its use! otherwise, you will call "rent a gangster" at some point, to no avail.
loaf,
it's good to see you warning gringos not to hire sicarios. a lot of gringos run to these sicarios when they get violated. however, these ex-con deportees have no interest in helping gringos. they're more interested in venganza for being imprisoned in el norte and then deported. any money that changes hands will be considered reparations for what they consider to be wrongs committed against them by the gringo's peers. most gringos wouldn't follow your recommendation to become pistoleros though, they prefer using proxies.
TurdyCurdyOne
12-19-09, 03:25
<snip>
ADVICE: You cannot trust a "Rent a Gangster" beyond the beer you share in a public establishment! Anything more places you in peril. Game changed: You think "white USA" while they think "minority USA" and "deported Nicaraguan." You have 0% chance.
Take the streets into your hand with a licensed concealed carry handgun and no fear in its use! Otherwise, you will call "Rent a Gangster" at some point, to no avail.The best advice is to be smart enough not to put yourself in a position to be f**cked in the FIRST place.
I notice you don't supply and guidelines as to how to get such a permit.
I would guess much easier to say than to do; requiring quite a bit of how they say "bite" there.
The best advice is to be smart enough not to put yourself in a position to be f**cked in the FIRST place.
I notice you don't supply and guidelines as to how to get such a permit.
I would guess much easier to say than to do; requiring quite a bit of how they say "bite" there.
You file your immigration papers with the Nicaraguan immigration office for a temporary residency (ie. 1-year). You need to submit USA documentation including financial statements, criminal history, etcetera: Immigration policies are uniform throughout the world, more or less. You file for a gun permit with the police. They issue you approval. You go to the gun store and buy a gun for US $600 minimum. You can import a gun and must declare it with customs.
Or you can go to the mercado and buy a "dirty" gun for US $300. And place yourself in the same position as the deportees: Deported from Nicaragua to the USA for a gun crime. And who wants that!
loaf,
it's good to see you warning gringos not to hire sicarios. a lot of gringos run to these sicarios when they get violated. however, these ex-con deportees have no interest in helping gringos. they're more interested in venganza for being imprisoned in el norte and then deported. any money that changes hands will be considered reparations for what they consider to be wrongs committed against them by the gringo's peers. most gringos wouldn't follow your recommendation to become pistoleros though, they prefer using proxies.
it's information / truth like this that earned "chocha monger" his hall of fame status.
TurdyCurdyOne
12-20-09, 20:34
You file your immigration papers with the Nicaraguan immigration office for a temporary residency (ie. 1-year). You need to submit USA documentation including financial statements, criminal history, etcetera: Immigration policies are uniform throughout the world, more or less. You file for a gun permit with the police. They issue you approval. You go to the gun store and buy a gun for US $600 minimum. You can import a gun and must declare it with customs.
Or you can go to the mercado and buy a "dirty" gun for US $300. And place yourself in the same position as the deportees: Deported from Nicaragua to the USA for a gun crime. And who wants that!Ok, thanks for the additional information. I have not been to Nicaragua but have been all over Mexico. If there are any similarities, you shoot someone there, even a criminal, and you're putting yourself in a position of getting screwed by every cop, prosecutor, lawyer, and magistrate between you and your freedom. Even more than in the USA, the only time to pull a gun is when your life is in imminent danger and even then it might not be advisable. Much better to never put yourself in a situation where there is any probability of having to use a gun in the first place. Of course that may entail never going to Nicaragua in the first place, or at least playing the tourist while you're there. If you're smart, I suppose you can establish connections there that will help you in a jam, but I suppose you must take certain risks to do this as well. An old adage comes to mind. 'Live by the gun, die by the gun'. The other obvious solution is to hire a body guard with a good reputation and preferably someone with local LEO connections; to wear body armor.
Ok, thanks for the additional information. I have not been to Nicaragua but have been all over Mexico. If there are any similarities, you shoot someone there, even a criminal, and you're putting yourself in a position of getting screwed by every cop, prosecutor, lawyer, and magistrate between you and your freedom. Even more than in the USA, the only time to pull a gun is when your life is in imminent danger and even then it might not be advisable. Much better to never put yourself in a situation where there is any probability of having to use a gun in the first place. Of course that may entail never going to Nicaragua in the first place, or at least playing the tourist while you're there. If you're smart, I suppose you can establish connections there that will help you in a jam, but I suppose you must take certain risks to do this as well. An old adage comes to mind. 'Live by the gun, die by the gun'. The other obvious solution is to hire a body guard with a good reputation and preferably someone with local LEO connections; to wear body armor.
Guns are illegal and prohibited in Mexico. Therefore, only the criminals and law enforcement have guns. Gun possession in Mexico is an automatic jail charge. At last check, 80 USA-citizens were in jail in Mexico for gun possession.
Along the USA-Mexican border on the USA-side are lots of warnings about taking a gun into Mexico.
A person needs a gun as to self-protect their person and property. This notion that guns are bad is false. Criminals are not concerned about laws therefore preventing law abiding citizens guns places the law abiding citizen in jeopardy. Those that write anti-gun legislation have armed-bodyguards and those of affluence use the argument that their wealth makes them a target and therefore they need a gun and armed bodyguards.
Shoot first, worry about the consequences later. But of course, you need an equal threat: You don't take a gun to a snowball fight!
With the pool house, security guard, sitting on acreage, and 3-bedrooms with a n entirely equipped detached apartment or "Mother-In Law Quarters," I have hoes coming in-and-out.
B.I.G. P.I.M.P.I.N., Spending G's exchanged into Cordobas.
So this light-skinned Chica Nica from Granada came over "the crib." She had big meat, not fat, but just meaty. She was / is probably similar to the wives or female counterpart that shares your bed nightly. Needless to say, I didn't want that shit!
I started the "panty drop" by requesting a massage after lunch. She obliged. She rubbed my back up-and-down.
Wait a minute, before lunch or as the maid was preparing lunch, she and I viewed some internet pornography movies. More than likely it was "Black D*cks, Latin Chicks". This hoe said she don't like sucking d*ck! This hoe said she don't like anal sex! This hoe requested movies with missionary style sex!
How Boring: She must not know that I'm Meat Loaf of ISG fame! And my interests are as fickle as a female!
In the bedroom she rubbed me down. I began squeezing the 36D-breasts. I raised up and sat on the sofa within my Master Bedroom. The balcony that views the Nicaraguan jungle is nice too. What view do you have from your wife's bedroom. After all, when she says it's over, she will retain the house and you will pack your bags. Hit the road Jack, and you come back except with check in hand for child support and visitation and gifts and whatever else she / government mandates.
Sucker.
I told her to derobe as I viewed from the sofa. She took off her clothes and modeled for me. Her body was meaty, but not fat. She has a "C-Section" scar and the kangaroo pouch. Nothing major: Nothing long-term.
I told her to get 4x4 in the bed. I squeezed those pillows she calls a*s cheeks. I dropped my shorts; left my sandles; and slapped her a*s with some d*ck. She knew she was going to get f*cked 4x4 and never see the d*ck. Never did she touch the d*ck. All she knew was the weight (lbs.)(kgs.) of the d*ck slapping her tramp stamp area!
With condom on, I slid the d*ck into her gutts! I stroked the p*ssy for about 10 - 15 minutes. I shot a weak load onto her left-leg and upper left-quadricep. I wiped it up a hand towel. She got dressed.
We went downstairs and watched television with the other house guests. An hour later the girls went swimming as I continued commercial activities.
P.I.M.P.S. Up,
H.O.E.S. Down.
P.S. I write too much sh*t that even I have a hard time keeping a straight face.
[QUOTE=P.S. I write too much sh*t that even I have a hard time keeping a straight face.[/QUOTE]
What more can I say than ...... Amen
"ISG Senior Member", "Gringo Friendly Confine's Gringo", and I went horseback riding a few weeks ago when "ISG Senior Member" was in the Land of Lakes & Volcanoes.
I really like "ISG Senior Member" and he has been most generous.
In my adult life I have never "driven a horse." As a youth, my uncle had some horses on the family plantation and I do recall getting abdominal cramps when I "drove the horses." Additionally, I have aspirations to place a polo pitch on Nicaraguan estate and also at the country club. Therefore, I was more than eager to learn how to "drive a horse" from the teachings of a native-Texan. (I'm also an avid fan of rodeo and am a frequent patron of (a) Black rodeos, (b) Native-American rodeos, (c) PBR, and (d) Mexican rodeos.)
At the ranch were many horses. Teasing Meat Loaf, "ISG Senior Member" said that I was to ride the horse called, "Lightning." ("ISG Senior Member" enjoyed testing the metal of Meat Loaf since I write such outlandish bullsh*t on ISG.)
Lacking my cowboy boots, I mounted the horse in tennis shoes. I didn't know what to do or not to do. "ISG Senior Member" and "Gringo Friendly Confine's Gringo" instructed me that riding a horse is similar to "driving a car." Pull the reins to the left for a desired left turn; pull the reins to the right for a desired right turn; kick the horse in his ribs to go forward; pull the reins directly back to stop or slow down the horse.
With the assistance of the ranch-hand who is a fine and respectable youth, I got the horse to depart the stalls. The three (3) Gringos begin to ride the horses around Nicaragua.
I liked riding the horse and with enthusiasm I shouted, "I like driving the horse!" The two (2) Gringos of 50-years plus burst out in laughter from such a statement: "Driving a horse." It was obvious that I'm a "city / suburban boy."
We rode the horses for about three (3) hours. My a*s hurt from bouncing up-and-down in the saddle. They commented that my screaming and "wow horsey" declarations distracted and scared the horses, but horses are some serious animals. When the horse would run that was fun, but scary.
"ISG Senior Member" introduce myself and "Gringo Friendly Confine's Gringo" to a side / portion of Nicaragua that is nothing like what I post. He introduced us to a beautiful side of Nicaragua. It was totally foreign to myself and associate. I like the Nicaragua he presented to us. And the people were quality too.
We witnessed some of the most expensive real estate in Nicaragua via horseback. Had it not been for "ISG Senior Member", I never would have known this side of Nicaragua: Had it not been for "ISG Senior Member", I would have probably not visited this area of Nicaragua. Thanks.
"ISG Senior Member" had a few "tricks" up his sleeve like this one trail that went uphill alongside barbwire with a tree branch looming to decapitate the horse rider. That tree almost f*cked me up. He had another "trick" that was carrying a papaya for three (3) miles in my arms. I can't even ride / drive a horse and was carrying a 36-inch long papaya. Luckily, I didn't get injured and he took over the freight.
A "Top 1%" associate granted me access to the polo stables and team for which I aspire to join. Polo ponies are no cheap feat since 10 are required. Only in Nicaragua could I aspire to play and purchase my wares for polo: As a youth, I was a staple at the neighboring polo club on Sundays. Polo team entrance is US $1,000,000 in Panama City. In Nicaragua, it's a lot cheaper.
Horses are a very common past-time by Gringos in Nicaragua. Lots of people have horse farms and ranches.
I enjoyed this horse excursion and thanks alot "ISG Senior Member." I'll probably start riding every couple of weeks or so.
Chocha Monger
12-29-09, 22:25
ISG Senior Member seems to have his shit together. He knows riding caballo is much better than pulling caballo. Don't tell the other gringos though, it might mess up the Nicaraguan Economic Equine Program.
"ISG Senior Member", "Gringo Friendly Confine's Gringo", and I were returning to the "Gringo Friendly Confines" from a night of socializing in Managua.
Throughout Nicaragua are two or four-lane highways. These highways are called, "carreteras" and these carreteras usually have several rotondas or traffic circles. Carreteras have every type of traffic on them incuding pedestrians walking along the shoulder, bicycles, horse-and-buggies, bus, motorcycles, cars, tractors, and whatever else a Nicaraguan decides to transport. Expressways as are common in the USA are non-existent in Nicaragua.
At approximately 0200 hours, we arrived in Cd. Masaya and stopped at the "On the Run" gas station for supplies. Jam-packed as all gasolineras (ie. gas stations) are. Drunkards, customers, tourists, and those hungry for some fried chicken lined the sales counters and parking lot.
Leaving the gas station we traveled a few feet on the carretera. In our immediate presence were two (2) cars stopped on the carretera in staggering positions. The location of the cars appeared to be some type of "jack move." Between the cars was just enough room to traverse.
Not knowing why the cars were parked on the "expressway," we continued forward. Were these cars parked in that position to commit a car jacking; armed robbery; or murder were the thoughts and questions of we, Gringos.
"ISG Senior Member" drove through the two (2) cars and a few feet from them were Gang Bangers, Banging. On the "expressway," approximately ten (10) Chicos Nicas were fighting. Along the shoulder; in the shadows were more Chicos Nicas.
Throwing rocks and stones across the "expressway", they were fighting. "ISG Senior Member" considered stopping the vehicle in the middle of the rock fight for their were some gang bangers / pedestrians in the middle of the driving lane. I, Meat Loaf, instructed "ISG Senior Member" to gas it: 1,000 points for running over a "dumb a*s Nica" is how you drive in Nicaragua.
When "ISG Senior Member" floored the car through the gangsters, one almost got caught and began hauling a*s from the driving lane. His buddies, other Chicos Nicas, in the shadows hurled a few rocks at the our vehicle. "Boom, boom, boom" was the sound when the rocks hit the passenger-side doors.
FACT: Nicaraguans do not respect anything! Nicaraguans do not respect anything because they do not work to acquire / produce anything. They don't care if others have worked to acquire possessions: If others have worked previously to acquire possessions, then they can work again to replace those injured possessions. This is the Nicaraguan mentality concerning almost everything in Nicaragua. Someone else can pay for it and pay for me / support me.
Wanting to jump from the car and "get thug" with these "wanksters" was my immediate reaction when they vandalized the car. Being smarter than that, we continued to roll down the carretera .
Upon arrival to our destination, we noticed that damaged had occurred to the vehicle.
Here's the bad part: "ISG Senior Member" rented the vehicle; paid for full-coverage insurance; and had to pay a deductible for the insurance claim upon rental car return. "ISG Senior Member" had to pay out-of-pocket for the damage 'caused by these fools, Nicaraguans, having a gang fight via rocks on the expressway.
This is a classic example of Nicaragua: The Land of Lakes & Volcanoes is costly at the most inconvenient time. Their "fuck-ups" have to be paid for / cleaned-up by you, G8. This is the "way it is" in everything Nicaragua. All of the NGOs / Non-Profits; the Chicas Nicas with 2 - 3 kids and no job; the Nicaraguan ringing your doorbell to ask for "free sh*t"; etcetera.
G8 pays for all of their stupid sh*t and f*ck-ups.
"French Travel," this is what I referred when I said, "You want to walk away clean with no liability."
Fortunately for "ISG Senior Member", he has more than enough money in the USA to bring back down for the next time, or assessment. The Nicaraguan will arbitrarily charge him / me / you / whoever.
"ISG Senior Member", "Gringo Friendly Confine's Gringo", and I were returning to the "Gringo Friendly Confines" from a night of socializing in Managua.
Throughout Nicaragua are two or four-lane highways. These highways are called, "carreteras" and these carreteras usually have several rotondas or traffic circles. Carreteras have every type of traffic on them incuding pedestrians walking along the shoulder, bicycles, horse-and-buggies, bus, motorcycles, cars, tractors, and whatever else a Nicaraguan decides to transport. Expressways as are common in the USA are non-existent in Nicaragua.
At approximately 0200 hours, we arrived in Cd. Masaya and stopped at the "On the Run" gas station for supplies. Jam-packed as all gasolineras (ie. gas stations) are. Drunkards, customers, tourists, and those hungry for some fried chicken lined the sales counters and parking lot.
Leaving the gas station we traveled a few feet on the carretera. In our immediate presence were two (2) cars stopped on the carretera in staggering positions. The location of the cars appeared to be some type of "jack move." Between the cars was just enough room to traverse.
Not knowing why the cars were parked on the "expressway," we continued forward. Were these cars parked in that position to commit a car jacking; armed robbery; or murder were the thoughts and questions of we, Gringos.
"ISG Senior Member" drove through the two (2) cars and a few feet from them were Gang Bangers, Banging. On the "expressway," approximately ten (10) Chicos Nicas were fighting. Along the shoulder; in the shadows were more Chicos Nicas.
Throwing rocks and stones across the "expressway", they were fighting. "ISG Senior Member" considered stopping the vehicle in the middle of the rock fight for their were some gang bangers / pedestrians in the middle of the driving lane. I, Meat Loaf, instructed "ISG Senior Member" to gas it: 1,000 points for running over a "dumb a*s Nica" is how you drive in Nicaragua.
When "ISG Senior Member" floored the car through the gangsters, one almost got caught and began hauling a*s from the driving lane. His buddies, other Chicos Nicas, in the shadows hurled a few rocks at the our vehicle. "Boom, boom, boom" was the sound when the rocks hit the passenger-side doors.
FACT: Nicaraguans do not respect anything! Nicaraguans do not respect anything because they do not work to acquire / produce anything. They don't care if others have worked to acquire possessions: If others have worked previously to acquire possessions, then they can work again to replace those injured possessions. This is the Nicaraguan mentality concerning almost everything in Nicaragua. Someone else can pay for it and pay for me / support me.
Wanting to jump from the car and "get thug" with these "wanksters" was my immediate reaction when they vandalized the car. Being smarter than that, we continued to roll down the carretera .
Upon arrival to our destination, we noticed that damaged had occurred to the vehicle.
Here's the bad part: "ISG Senior Member" rented the vehicle; paid for full-coverage insurance; and had to pay a deductible for the insurance claim upon rental car return. "ISG Senior Member" had to pay out-of-pocket for the damage 'caused by these fools, Nicaraguans, having a gang fight via rocks on the expressway.
This is a classic example of Nicaragua: The Land of Lakes & Volcanoes is costly at the most inconvenient time. Their "fuck-ups" have to be paid for / cleaned-up by you, G8. This is the "way it is" in everything Nicaragua. All of the NGOs / Non-Profits; the Chicas Nicas with 2 - 3 kids and no job; the Nicaraguan ringing your doorbell to ask for "free sh*t"; etcetera.
G8 pays for all of their stupid sh*t and f*ck-ups.
"French Travel," this is what I referred when I said, "You want to walk away clean with no liability."
Fortunately for "ISG Senior Member", he has more than enough money in the USA to bring back down for the next time, or assessment. The Nicaraguan will arbitrarily charge him / me / you / whoever.
Due to ISG Lurker harassment and other readers of Meat Loaf posts wanting testimonials / verification / "proof" of Meat Loaf's existence, "ISG Senior Member" does not like posting or being referred by screen-name. He clarified some things about the Masaya Gang Fight.
(1) He did purchase "full coverage", but the contract was 100% in Spanish. (2) "Full Coverage" is for car-on-car collision only. (3) Other acts of vehicle damage are not covered; 100% liable to the contractee (ie. renter). (4) In Nicaragua, all vehicle accidents must be paid for at the "scene of the accident." The police station. (Remember US $40,000 extortion of Gringo posting?) (5) Since it was a rental car, "ISG Senior Member" had to satisfy the "estimated" valued of vehicle damage at the rental agency upon vehicle return. In Nicaragua, no son bobos (ie. we aint stupid). We know that you can refute a VISA / MASTERCARD / AMEX card six (6) months into the future. This includes debit cards utilizing the above credit card brands. Hence, you must pay in cash: Take that same card you want to charge on, and go to the ATM and get a cash advance / cash withdrawal. ¡Gringo!
"ISG Senior Member" paid several hundreds of dollars. This was the gratitude extended by Chicos Nicas fighting with rocks on the "expressway."
Let's not even think about the other hundreds / thousands / tens of thousands / hundreds of thousands of dollars that "ISG Senior Member" has already spent / invested / exposed himself financially on the behalf of Nicaragua.
Nicaragua is costly.
Come visit Nicaragua: The people are friendly; the weather is warm; Meat Loaf has all of the hoes; and you can spend as much money as you want although it may not be how you want. ¡Bienvenidos!
You guys in North America have no idea what value a vehicle truly has. For one, any chump in the USA can buy a car on credit, same day.
An associate had his driver-side window broken by a Chico Nica throwing a beer bottle. He went to the dealership to inquire about the replacement charge. The dealership said it will cost US $740 to replace the driver-side door of the SUV.
The Gringo bought the window in the USA and had another transient Gringo bring it down as carry-on luggage. Total cost US $118 plus US $20 for the alley mechanic to install.
You can't afford to drive in Nicaragua, either.
There is a truth which I turned into a joke:
In Nicaragua, when you want to work there is no work / jobs available;
when you don't want to work / have a job they are abundant.
This is especially true when you use (1) internet service, (2) electricity utility, and (3) water utility. You need to purchase power generators run on gasoline which is US $5 per gallon and water wells / tanks costing thousands of dollars for back-up. For internet back-up you can purchase satellite service for US $500.
Everyone in Nicaragua is vulnerable to the sovereign land knows as Nicaragua.
You can't afford to live here! If you can't win in Nicaragua unless you live here!
John Gault
01-09-10, 02:35
You guys in North America have no idea what value a vehicle truly has. For one, any chump in the USA can buy a car on credit, same day.
An associate had his driver-side window broken by a Chico Nica throwing a beer bottle. He went to the dealership to inquire about the replacement charge. The dealership said it will cost US $740 to replace the driver-side door of the SUV.
The Gringo bought the window in the USA and had another transient Gringo bring it down as carry-on luggage. Total cost US $118 plus US $20 for the alley mechanic to install.
You can't afford to drive in Nicaragua, either.
I am a experenced Monger who has been to many countrys in Latin America.
After a few experences with Nica's in other countrys I decided to go to the sourse. In planning my trip to Nica Land I have been reading this board every day to gather important intel.
After reading your posts I have decided that if even half of what you say is true than I will now look elsewhere. This comes from a Army vet who also worked as a Sgt. many years in a tough State Prison in New Jersey.
you are very good at keeping this place to yourself.
I am a experenced Monger who has been to many countrys in Latin America.
After a few experences with Nica's in other countrys I decided to go to the sourse. In planning my trip to Nica Land I have been reading this board every day to gather important intel.
After reading your posts I have decided that if even half of what you say is true than I will now look elsewhere. This comes from a Army vet who also worked as a Sgt. many years in a tough State Prison in New Jersey.
you are very good at keeping this place to yourself.
"Vics Picks," what are looking for in a vacation / trip?
Tell me and I can detail how it will fulfill your interests.
All I do is write "how it is" and the "life I live" in Nicaragua. I've detailed my personal biography so that others can understand who / what is required for Nicaraguan existence and also how Nicaragua is the same for everyone regardless of pedigree.
I attempted to show readers that Nicaragua and those who are ex-pat in Nicaragua are a different breed than other ex-pats in "friendly" ex-pat countries.
We, ex-pats, can / could live in "friendly" ex-pat countries too, but do not / choose not to. It takes a "special" Gringo to live in Nicaragua.
Again, what are you looking for?
Mandatory Reading for those that Doubt Meat Loaf.
Read the biography of the 2-time democratically elected President of Nicaragua, Daniel Ortega: http://www.answers.com/topic/daniel-ortega
I will beginning a new theme or series of postings called, "Classic Bobo."
"Classic Bobo" will detail the foolishness, dumbness, caballo desire, and other guaranteed failing practices of Gringos in / when entering Nicaragua.
"Classic Bobo" is meant to show how Gringos are not prepared for victory in Nicaragua and what they do that makes / will make them carne molida.
"Classic Bobo" can and should be used as case studies as to prevent committing the same mistakes as the baboso (ie. fool).
John Gault
01-09-10, 16:31
"Vics Picks," what are looking for in a vacation / trip?
Tell me and I can detail how it will fulfill your interests.
All I do is write "how it is" and the "life I live" in Nicaragua. I've detailed my personal biography so that others can understand who / what is required for Nicaraguan existence and also how Nicaragua is the same for everyone regardless of pedigree.
I attempted to show readers that Nicaragua and those who are ex-pat in Nicaragua are a different breed than other ex-pats in "friendly" ex-pat countries.
We, ex-pats, can / could live in "friendly" ex-pat countries too, but do not / choose not to. It takes a "special" Gringo to live in Nicaragua.
Again, what are you looking for?
Mandatory Reading for those that Doubt Meat Loaf.
Read the biography of the 2-time democratically elected President of Nicaragua, Daniel Ortega: http://www.answers.com/topic/daniel-ortega
I have Read the biography of the 2-time democratically elected President of Nicaragua, Daniel Ortega: http://www.answers.com/topic/daniel-ortega
As a young man I was very aware of the USA involement in Latin America. I remember seeing on the news protesters carrying signs saying ( Yankee go home.) Many years later when I started to visit different So. American countries I was very surprised to see how many people actually loved the USA, when myself who was happy to get away from all the politicly correctness that the US had now embraced with total gusto.
That said I apolgise for doubting some of your writings as I really have no strong evidence to do so.
To answer your question of what am I looking for in a vacation / trip.
Nothing much different than other guys you have run into. I like to walk in a new city and go to local resturants and local dives. I really get a kick out of visiting Joints were otther people post the place is not for Gringos. I find those places to be the most interesting. As far as hunting for pretty women Latin America is a Paradise. Of course one has to be very careful to not be tricked by these beautiful and street wise creatures. On that score I find your writings to be most helpful.
I need other diversions so I either like the beach in say the DR or I go to the horse races in Lima or Casinos for Holdem poker or a little balck jack. One can not monger 24/7.
I have Read the biography of the 2-time democratically elected President of Nicaragua, Daniel Ortega: http://www.answers.com/topic/daniel-ortega
As a young man I was very aware of the USA involement in Latin America. I remember seeing on the news protesters carrying signs saying ( Yankee go home.) Many years later when I started to visit different So. American countries I was very surprised to see how many people actually loved the USA, when myself who was happy to get away from all the politicly correctness that the US had now embraced with total gusto.
That said I apolgise for doubting some of your writings as I really have no strong evidence to do so.
To answer your question of what am I looking for in a vacation / trip.
Nothing much different than other guys you have run into. I like to walk in a new city and go to local resturants and local dives. I really get a kick out of visiting Joints were otther people post the place is not for Gringos. I find those places to be the most interesting. As far as hunting for pretty women Latin America is a Paradise. Of course one has to be very careful to not be tricked by these beautiful and street wise creatures. On that score I find your writings to be most helpful.
I need other diversions so I either like the beach in say the DR or I go to the horse races in Lima or Casinos for Holdem poker or a little balck jack. One can not monger 24/7.
Everyone always wants to know if Meat Loaf posts are true? Even I do not know.
Truthfully, I don't do much beyond hang out on the street corners and in the office.
After 2 months in Leon, I can report the action.
First, Leon is ALIVE at night from 10 pm to 2 am on Tuesday (after recuperating from the week-end) and Thursday nights and of course all week end including Sunday.
You need to speak Spanish enough to have a conversation and you need to be willing to charm the ladies.
Places to hit: BAR BARO, a restaurant bar at about 3 minutes walk from the Cathedral or Central Park. Just order some drink and food if you are hungry and ask the waiter (promising a good tip of 10 Cordobas or more) to point out easy girls working the place for a fee, usually 300 to 500 cordobas. Don t go any higher not to spoil the game for you later or other gringos coming later. Be at this bar around 7 to 8 in the evening.
Discos with action on Tuesday and Thursday: DON SENOR, good any Tuesday evening, with Tona beer for 20-25 cordobas. Very few gringos go there, but if you speak spanish, go for it as part-time prostitutes work the place, single mothers with one or 2 children. How do you spot them? They are the ones with plastic or shiny high heels and large handbags.
On Thursday nights, a disco called ILLION at about 3 minutes walk from the Cathedral attracts low wages sales girls or students from the Interior. Some young full time prostitutes also hit the place looking for easy money.
With Friday and the week end, visit OXYGENE a disco with large video screen, some American rock, but mostly reggaeton is the flavor for all discos.
Buy for yourself some beer if you want but the thing to do for locals is to buy a small bottle of hard liquor with soda for 130 Cordobas or $6.50 but make sure the girl does not invite all her friends.
Street prostitutes for 150. 200 Cordobas can be had any evening from usuallly 8 p. M to midnight in the parking lot of the convenience store ON THE RUN 5 to 10 minutes outside of the city of Leon. Ask a taxi driver to give you directions. You will need to pay extra about 70 cordobas to pay a motel room in the neighbourhood. Don t worry the girl will lead you to the right place very close by.
Who said LEON was dull!
There are two strib clubs with rooms on the Pan American Highway south of Esteli. The Pussy Cat club is closer. On a Thursday evening they had 5 girls working, none of them better than a 6. Asking price is 300 cordobas. The other club, farther south, is a little better. On a Wednesday night, they had 7 girls, two of them decent 7's. The problem there is that the older *****s are very aggressive about trying to get lady drinks. I had to physically push one away. Asking price is also 300 cordobas.
Many of the dive bars in town have working girls and or locals who are happy to help you find them. Some of them have rooms in the back. Cafe Rosy west of the river is notable. They usually ask 150 cordobas.
All in all, quality pros are hard to find.
The discos, however, are fertile hunting grounds for non pros. There aren't very many of them, but they are pretty, and very interested in meeting gringos. Las Vegas on Avenida Central between the market and the Pan American Highway is good, as is Axis on the Highway. The discos are rarely busy, but the few chicas there are easy.
I just listed the asking prices, everything is negotiable as always.
At Tip-Top; turn right from if coming from Granada or turn left from if coming from Managua or go straight ahead if coming from downtown Masaya (ie. north); go north 1.5 blocks; hotel called "el Eterno Amor"; turn corner; and enter the bar area of the business.
¡No vale la pena!
I went to Chinandega and didn´t see much.
I saw a Chiquita banana truck, nice baseball fields, sugar cane fields, and rice fields. I can see this in Katy, Texas (ie. a Houston suburb.)
They havae three night clubs that require males wear long pants.
They have 2 bordelos.
They have lots of Sandanista flags.
It´s nothing worth writing about.
I went to Corinto and didn´t see much besides the port of entry with three crains. I´ve seen much bigger and better in Panama City, Panama; Long Beach, California; and the Port of Houston.
Their playa or beach area is weak and nothing like Veracruz in Panama City, Panama, or 31st and 39th street beach in Chicago. The only patrons were the typical Nicaraguan family with to many kids and everyone swimming in their street clothes.
I wanted to eat a fish dinner, but they wanted to charge C$ 150 when I had a huge fish plate in Pochomil for C $ 50. Hence, I denied the purchase.
Chinandeganos talk about Corinto having p*ssy at the bars and nightclubs, but I doubt that. I did hear from a semi-truck driver that these tramps want US $ 150 per polvo. Cabrona please.
All in all, Corinto is lame. If it wasn´t for my fascination with international trade and ports, I would have not gone.
They get Gringo suckers in town when a few cruise lines dock at the port.
Corinto was heavily mined by the USA during the war in the 1970s and 1980s. The USA lost the case in the Hague, but refused / contempt of court and didn´t pay the US $5 Billion judgement.
This town waves Sandanista flags all over the place.
Home of Flor de Cana Rum.
This is a little dusty a*s town with a baseball stadium named after Flor de Cana.
Aint sh*t her either.
Nicaragua is big turd of nothing.
Lots of dusty and dirty a*s people lined the town.
Nothing to write about.
The Loaf is spot-on in his comments on chasing tail in Chinandega and Corinto. I have been in Chinandega dozens and dozens of times and never had any luck whatsoever. However, I have also been to Cornito dozens of times but only once looking for a woman. And I found one. Was at a dumpy little bar down on the beach and picked up a girl. She took me back to her place just a block from the industrial port. Not a bad lay, probably the best you would ever find in Corinto. I just got lucky. Don't go to Chinandega or Corinto looking for action. And if you have to be in those towns your best bet is to drive the hour back down to Leon.
When any city has 18 - 24 Catholic churches - cathedrals than any intelligent monger should realize that p*ssy is not going to be had. This holds especially true for putas working in a putaria.
Every 2 - 3 blocks has a new and different Catholic church holding down the block. With all of these Catholic churches, I will buy the argument that Leon, Nicaragua, Central America, was the first city / colonial city in the American Hemisphere.
The Catholic Church is the world´s richest commercial enterprise. Religious organizations have tax-free IRS status within the USA and other G8 countries too. I, Meat Loaf, have always wanted my very own church for this fact and probably will start one in the future. Being that I attended the majority of my primary, secondary, and post-secondary schooling at religious institutions, I know of it´s financial value and revenue stream. Hey, just look at Don Juan of Chicago´s west side for proof. He is / was a top-notch P.I.M.P. and gained pop-culture fame through association with Snoop Dogg.
After 2 months in Leon, I can report the action.
First, Leon is ALIVE at night from 10 pm to 2 am on Tuesday (after recuperating from the week-end) and Thursday nights and of course all week end including Sunday.
You need to speak Spanish enough to have a conversation and you need to be willing to charm the ladies.
Places to hit: BAR BARO, a restaurant bar at about 3 minutes walk from the Cathedral or Central Park. Just order some drink and food if you are hungry and ask the waiter (promising a good tip of 10 Cordobas or more) to point out easy girls working the place for a fee, usually 300 to 500 cordobas. Don t go any higher not to spoil the game for you later or other gringos coming later. Be at this bar around 7 to 8 in the evening.
Discos with action on Tuesday and Thursday: DON SENOR, good any Tuesday evening, with Tona beer for 20-25 cordobas. Very few gringos go there, but if you speak spanish, go for it as part-time prostitutes work the place, single mothers with one or 2 children. How do you spot them? They are the ones with plastic or shiny high heels and large handbags.
On Thursday nights, a disco called ILLION at about 3 minutes walk from the Cathedral attracts low wages sales girls or students from the Interior. Some young full time prostitutes also hit the place looking for easy money.
With Friday and the week end, visit OXYGENE a disco with large video screen, some American rock, but mostly reggaeton is the flavor for all discos.
Buy for yourself some beer if you want but the thing to do for locals is to buy a small bottle of hard liquor with soda for 130 Cordobas or $6.50 but make sure the girl does not invite all her friends.
Street prostitutes for 150. 200 Cordobas can be had any evening from usuallly 8 p. M to midnight in the parking lot of the convenience store ON THE RUN 5 to 10 minutes outside of the city of Leon. Ask a taxi driver to give you directions. You will need to pay extra about 70 cordobas to pay a motel room in the neighbourhood. Don t worry the girl will lead you to the right place very close by.
Who said LEON was dull!
I, Meat Loaf, say Leon is dull and weak. The church situation is enough reason and proof.
During the afternoon I went to Barbaro. This is an upscale location with the best alcohol selection I have witnessed in Nicaragua. There are 0% prostitutes here.
The daytime in Leon was / is boring. Everyone- the locals both foreign and native- confirmed this fact. When one has to look at the calendar and time of day to plan their party, it should be realized that aint sh*t happening. Understand, I, Meat Loaf, dictate my party and not the city.
At night, I, and 3-Gringos went to Don Senor. It was empty and they closed at midnight. This is a disco.
I, Meat Loaf, do not patronize discos but only putarias and cantinas and street corners.
Illion and Oxygen are some more discos. They are all located on the same block as Barbaro. Again, nothing was happening.
After sleeping from 1600 - 2300 hours, I went to the above locations and saw nothing. Three gay guys did proposition me to f*ck them while drinking a beer at Barbaro, but I declined.
At Barbaro I had a Grolsch beer which had not been consumed by me in over 10 years. When locations in Nicaragua start selling Grolsch beer this is a sign of too many foreigners / Gringos being present.
I found a wh*re house open during the daytime in a seedy neighborhood. I entered. Present were 5 fat a*s wh*res. The type of female that makes you guys monger. I´m talking about their gutts / bellies were bigger than yours. And they were 40 - 50 years of age. One young tenderoni was present, but she was caballa. After drinking a liter of Tona and listening to reggae, I fled the scene. They attempted to molest me by grabbing my Meat Loaf and commenting that we, Bluefields people, have long schlongs.
The white girls- Gringas- like Leon ´cause they can chase semi-respectable Latin Lovers in their 20s´and 30s´. Unlike Granada where the Gringas hunt for loosers- vagobundos-, the Gringas in Leon hunt for pretty boys.
The white boys that I befriended told me that they live in Leon and get 0% p*ssy, respect, nor acknowledgement from the local population and Chicas Nicas. They said that it sucks in Leon. And these were some handsome white boys in their mid to late 20s´ with White Boy Money.
Leon is a youg city with Gringos in in their 20s´ and 30s´. Granada is an old city of 50 and 60-year old Gringos.
Since I´m on the road I will end this report.
Summary is that Leon sucks.
For many within the USA their fascination / only option are the lot lizards that work the truck stops. OKC, Torrence Avenue, and Akron are some famous lot lizard truck stops.
In Leon, at the gasolinera is the truck stop. And as such, the lot lizards are their working.
This is the only true putaria in Leon.
Back to Basics with Lot Lizards.
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