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Your ability to meet an American woman is tied to the size of your income and bank account. AWs have become such an afterthought after living overseas for so long, on another note, since I made my post about the petrodollar, it has continued to fall, so much that in Europe an American official was questioned by the press as to what the hell is happening. Ask Fan Gang from China about what he thinks about the US Dollar.
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MMB:
My gf (now fiancée) does the webcam sex thing for a living. She doesn't consider herself a prostitute, although she DEFINITELY is a sex worker.
And she doesn't 'love' the guys on chat, any more than porn actresses 'love' the guys with whom they are doing a scene!! She is selling a fantasy more than any reality just like any sex worker.
And we both 'get a little on the side' every now and again. :P
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Mmbmmb
I don't want the princess in a tower, waiting for somebody to rescue them (that's "Capt Save A Hoe" in the ghetto).
If she wants to stay home, that's fine. I'm NOT expecting a 21st Century version of "Donna Reed".
My ex was pretty much ideal personality wise, its the other stuff that lead me to continue my search. No matter how frivolous some might believe the value I put on "other stuff", that's what I look for. I'm not in search of perfection, that is not reality.
I am looking for a nice balance however.
I'm not sure why we would need nannies and all that. Honestly if things go the way I think they'll go we won't have to work for anybody, we can build our own businesses and work when WE want too. I already wanted to spend extended time at home once the kids got around school age. I believe they need their mother more early on and their father around more in their formative years.
Even if it doesn't work out like that, I much prefer somebody that is willing to do what's needed, rather than AW thinking that "YOU" should do what's needed, I'll continue to do what I am doing.
Dating in the US is just too much trouble. The only interested party here is a 41 year old woman with grown children. You might find that hard to believe, but more often than not, that's who usually contacts me.
I shouldn't have to buy a new condo, a BMW and a metrosexually styled wardrobe just to have access to single American woman around 25-32 years old.
But that's what they would have you believe and like I said investing time and money inside the US but outside of California is suicide. You'll basically end up with the same problems but a much smaller pool to access form.
I have spent alot of time around the US; in cities and towns, large and small. I see the same problems only WORST in those areas because you're not left with alot of options if you live in Ark for example, work at Walmart and drive a Geo Metro.
The upper 30% in town are not going to come any where near you!
C'mon I drove a truck for awhile, that's totally unpopular with any woman I consider attractive here. But over "there" THEY DON'T CARE. The Norwegian girl even suggested as much as her brother-in-law drives a truck in Norway.
I am not saying you can find or not run into unscrupulous women. I can only say if you fall into something blindly then you deserve whatever happens to you.
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Another long post
Gentlemen,
I’m sorry I couldn’t answer you earlier. Well, last time I wanted to write something more but as usually I had no time But maybe firstly I’ll answer to your posts.
Bango Cheito,
Maybe the word "love" wasn’t proper. I didn’t mean that she cares of her clients as of her boyfriend but on the other hand this work leaves some "scars" on her psyche. Writing "scars" I want to say that my friend has problems to cut off her job from personal life. She doesn’t like some clients, or rather she thinks that they are naïve idiots who she can "milk" for the money. But there are also clients she likes. They are nice and intelligent. When she sometimes told me about them I had impression that she cares of them in some way. She feels pity for them that they have problems with wives, at work etc. The job she had is very specific. You wrote "She is selling a fantasy more than any reality just like any sex worker". It’s truth but this sort of fantasy is peculiar because the clients try to buy the real feelings. She told me that some of them fell in love with the girls. They even want to take them to US. But unfortunately there’s always an uncle or grandma who’s dying; .) and they can’t come to America. This situation is, for me, a hunting for people’s hope. Even if these people are naïve idiots it doesn’t change the fact that you know what kind of bullshit you "sell" them. It leaves also "scars" on their psyche. You wrote about porn actresses. I think it’s a very hard job, especially for a woman. Even if some people are convinced that all you have to do is making love, or rather f*cking because "love" also isn’t a proper word here. I don’t know what kind of robot you would have to be, to not feel anything when 3 guys f*ck you, asking all the time "do you like it be**ch? " For some reasons they decided to take this job. I don’t know why. For sure something forced them to it but as I wrote everyone has his/her own life and we have to pay for all decisions we made. And the price we pay is sufficient "punishment" for all bad decisions.
It’s great if you feel ok with your fiancée’s style of life. I can only wish you luck. I hope you’ll be happy. I only don’t understand why gentlemen write so many unpleasant things about AW. It’s all right when your girlfriend uses other men but when AW do it it’s bad? It’s obvious, gentlemen, that you like to "get a little on the side". But why it’s so horrible when AW is unfaithful? Why are you complaining if you accept such behavior in other women and in yourselves?
BTW, you’re the second guy I know who accept such job of his girlfriend. Now I more understand what Jelly Donut wrote about "ownership". Most EE men would say "What? ! My woman works at webcam sex? ! I’ll simply kill her! "
[QUOTE=DJ FourMoney]Honestly if things go the way I think they'll go we won't have to work for anybody, we can build our own businesses and work when WE want too. [/QUOTE]DJ FourMoney,
So you have luck because a lot of people need nanny. They work for banks, stores, police, night clubs and so on. They can’t stay at home. When the family doesn’t want to help, or they can’t, someone has to take care of your child. Will you leave it alone at home? I agree that child needs a mother very much during the first 3 years of its life but after these 3 years, when you stay at home, you’re less and less valuable worker. That’s why having a child is very serious decision for me. Child isn’t a toy you can have because you feel that your biological clock is "in the state of alarm". I’d like to give my child everything what I got from my parents. To teach him/her how beautiful life can be, to show my child everything what’s wonderful in life, from the renaissance art to the taste of French crepe Suzette or Ukrainian borsch:.) Did you know that when a child is listening to the music of Mozart, even as a fetus (it can hear when it’s 16 weeks), its brain is stimulated and music therapy is used to fight against such diseases as epilepsy or autism? But to know it you need a lot of time and willingness to work with your child. How many people come back so tired from work that all they dream about is an evening in front of TV? Life isn’t ideal. You ‘re definitely a lucky man if you can afford to let your wife for being "a mom at home".
[QUOTE=DJ FourMoney]I shouldn't have to buy a new condo, a BMW and a metrosexually styled wardrobe just to have access to single American woman around 25-32 years old.
But that's what they would have you believe and like I said investing time and money inside the US but outside of California is suicide. You'll basically end up with the same problems but a much smaller pool to access form. [/QUOTE]Why California is an exception?
[QUOTE=DJ FourMoney]see'mon I drove a truck for awhile, that's totally unpopular with any woman I consider attractive here. But over "there" THEY DON'T CARE. The Norwegian girl even suggested as much as her brother-in-law drives a truck in Norway[/QUOTE]I guess people admire cars so much in US because they are more necessary then in Europe. In USA you haven’t good public transport. I don’t have a car. I don’t even need one. Everywhere I want to go I can use buses, trams, taxi, trains or planes. Car is a car. I mean if it lets you to go to a store or a post office it’s a good car. The smaller and the less fuel it uses the better. I couldn’t also understand the love for the SUV but it’s maybe because in my country fuel costs 5, 67$ for gallon. (4, 1-4, 2 zlotych for 1 liter; 1$=2, 76 zl and 1 US gallon= 3, 7854l). Anyway I wrote already an example where I made a difference between Ford and Audi. You wrote truck, you mean this?
[url]http: //trucks. About.com/cs/dodgetruckphotos/l/bl_05dakota_04. Htm[/url]
Of course it’s not popular:.) It’s good for someone as you, if you’re 6’0. I’m only 5’26. Can you imagine me trying to get into this car? Especially if I wear a nice, tight skirt. Now you have an answer why it’s not popular;.)
Ok gentlemen. I have to admit to one more thing. A I wrote I found your forum by accident. And when I saw a thread about AW I was really interesting what you write. It’s a little about men ‘s point of view but I was really surprised that you’re so unsatisfied with AW. To tell the truth my EE male friends didn’t complain so much or they complained for all women of the world;.) But what’s more important for me, someone I care about was/is? Convinced that EE women are better. It was only an accident that I was born in Poland. It only gives you information that English isn’t my native language but it can’t say if I have garbage in my head or not.
Lately I found also another thread at this forum: "Marrying Foreign Women". Rock Dog wrote there a post:
"Let's make up a little "Service Comparison".
Local women.... mostly (50 - 75%) fat and/or out of shape.
Foreign women..... very few (5 - 10%) fat or out of shape.
Local women...... poisoned by feminist ideology.
Foreign women..... what's a feminist?
Local women...... view men as adversaries, at best.. someone to be exploited.
Foreign women...... View men as caregivers and therefore someone to be supported and respected.
Local women.... 60% chance of getting a divorce.
Foreign women.... Don't know for sure, but it's got to be less than that.
Local women...... want to marry one that's 10 yrs younger? Mission Impossible
Foreign women..... 5, 10, 15 yrs younger?..... not a problem!
Local women..... have expectations bordering on fantasy, when they look between their legs they see a million dollar asset.
Foreign women... tend to be far more practical and realistic in their expectations. For them, owning a vagina is no big deal, because they know every other girl has one too.”
I won’t comment the part about shape. You can find fat people all over the world. And I know what the feminism is. You perceive it as an ideology who changed women from ideal angels into creatures without hearts. It’s not truth. Feminism let women to be independent and equal individuals in the positive way. The behavior you describe (greed, lack of respect for other people etc) has noting to do with feminism. It’s about someone’s character, so don’t blame feminism.
I don’t think that AW view you, gentlemen, as someone they can exploit. If some of them view you this way I think they would also look in the same way at e. G. EE men and EE women. You simply had a bad luck to meet such people who see only your money. And if someone gives you love it’s normal that you treat this person with respect. It doesn’t mean if he/she from Europe, US or Australia.
Especially for you I found some data from 2004. It was a very important year because it had the biggest amount of divorce in all history of Poland. Sic! In all history. So maybe you’ll find it interesting.
In 2004 there was +- 56 000 of divorces. It’s 293, 2 for every1000 of new marriages and 14, 7 for 10 000 of people (Poland has 38mln of people). The reasons: 32% incompatibility of spouses’ character, 24% unfaithfulness, 9% reprehensible attitude toward the members of family, 9% financial problems, 3% others. In 75% of cases it was a woman who asked for divorce. 70% of divorces is without verdict about someone’s fault. I’m interested from where you took this 60%. Did you find any data or you aren’t sure again?
Yes, you’re right. 15 years of difference isn’t a big problem, at least for me. Do you want to know why? Because I don’t look at these 15 years but at a man. I don’t know where’s the problem. That he will die first, yes? :.) I don’t remember that someone gave me a guarantee that it would happen. And what if I die in a car accident and he will be healthy to the old age? What if I get a message that I have a leukemia, being 35, and he won’t even get a cough? We don’t know gentlemen what’s waiting for us. I don’t like to make plans for the next 20 years of my life because I can’t be sure anything. Besides if I had leukemia and I knew that I have only 1 year of life I would like to enjoy it even more. I wouldn’t care if the beloved person is 20 or 40.
And no, I don’t see a million $ between my legs. I guess I would be a polish national treasure if I had it there;.) And because I had biology at school I know also that other girls have vagina (not only in my country). But gentlemen, I promise that if I’m so famous as J. Lo I’ll insure my precious butt for 1 million $. Then Rock Dog will be able to say that even Polish girls see between their legs a million dollar asset.
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[QUOTE=Mmbmmb]
I only don’t understand why gentlemen write so many unpleasant things about AW.[/QUOTE]
For what it's worth, I know there are a lot of women here in the USA that are outstanding, if I were thinking about living in the United States and having a family here I would almost certainly marry an American woman. That's just me - my opinion based on my experiences.
Also, from my experience, money is a relatively less important factor to American women than it is for women where the per capita GNP is lower. American women are more removed from thinking about money - many worry more about finding something deeper, something more about the contrasts, colors and textures of life. I think this makes it more difficult for a lot of guys to understand them, since money plays a major part in the way a lot of guys think about themselves and their place in the world. A lot of girls in other countries have a much more "grounded" way of thinking about things, so there's often more common ground between American men and these women.
I know a few guys, divorced guys specifically, that will point out that money is what it is all about when a American marriage is falling apart, but I don't know that territory. I just think money is not the only, or even the principle, thing on a woman's mind leading up to the marriage.
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Amen J.D.
""A lot of girls in other countries have a much more "grounded" way of thinking about things, so there's often more common ground between American men and these women.""
I agree with Jelly D, and by grounded, my feeling is that foreign women think in terms of "the family" and not themselves so much.
Men, absolutely are brought up to be the bread winners and having a good source of income is crucial for the support(house, cars, vacations, etc) , AW do not think of the family in the same respect, AW think( clothes, cosmetics, etc)....
I was married to an AW, and now have a Panamanian GF, the difference in family values is mazing. My AW ex, now remarried, still not work, still goes to school at age 36, has house cleaners, and stops at the grocery store for a take out dinner. My Panamanian GF works, comes home cooks, and the kids help clean the house, it is a family effort.
Sure there are probably some good AW, but it is so difficult to find amongst the rubble. AW as a group, think more of themselves than of a commitment to family. I work in an office and listen to the AW complain about their men. Apparently, us AM are not living up to what the AW are reading in their novels. Again, these AW are living in a world apart from reality of being part of a family.
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Mmb:
FourMoney was talking about driving a truck, a 5 ton truck with 18 wheels and 40 feet long carrying goods across the country. We not only don't use trains much to transport people, we don't use them much for freight either!
And personally I have never complained about AW using men IN THAT WAY. There are some big cultural differences at work here.
My biggest problem with my AW wife whom I divorced was simply that she couldn't accept me as the person that I am and felt she needed to change me. My current fiancée would cut off both her breasts before she would do something like this, and I feel the same way towards her. I want her to be herself forever and only want to help her change the things about her that SHE wants to change.
And yes her job is extremely difficult. It affects her sex drive of course, because she is not made of wood, she has REAL orgasms while she's working and that tires her out. Her work is very physically demanding in many surprising ways, and because of all that she probably won't be working at it full time for the rest of her life. But there are positives about it too, she gets to work on her languages, especially English, and she gets an insight few of us have into human nature.
I actually have the highest respect for women who work in the sex industry in any way. I think many of them are the wisest people on the planet.
I think America as a country and as a culture (if one could even say America really has a culture in the same way a place like Poland has), is suffering like it never has before in its history, and it's not really a problem with women, it is a combination of deep rooted problems with its cultural institutions. I think part of the problem is the car, like you pointed out, people are just FASCINATED with it here, which is something I never understood, I love my bicycle! :P but part of it also is that people have very unrealistic expectations of each other here, both women AND men.
I don't think too many AM are going to solve the problems by marrying foreign women either, because the expectations are still artificially high, and eventually ANY woman is going to fall short, in many cases. Likewise, I think many foreign women actually DO believe bullshit like 'American men don't cheat' etc. and they hold a lot of myths that can be dangerous.
Also the big problem between two people from two different countries and two different cultures is that unless you are really really well off financially you have to live in ONE country which means that generally the person who moves is going to have to learn a new culture. First off, that means there is a very real danger of sometimes very severe culture shock.
This is especially a big deal for Latin American women coming up to Canada or the US. Many of them have only heard the positives of North America and none of the negatives, and they are totally mentally unprepared for what actually awaits them. Many women from Latin countries come up here for the first time and just BURST INTO TEARS at what they see, especially if they were actually from a nice middle-class neighborhood in some South American city and they wind up living somewhere real gritty up here. Not to mention the loss of closeness to family and friends etc. it can be a big problem.
That is one of the many reasons I'm moving to Bogota to be with my girl, instead of she up here with me. Fortunately in my case I've been hanging out with Colombians for the past 12-13 years or so, already speak the language well, and have a good handle on the culture.
NYC may not exactly be hell on Earth, hell, I still consider it the best part of the whole USA, but for her it would be a horrible experience. The dirt, the rats, the garbage etc. all doesn't bother me but it would drive her up the wall! Not to mention she has a son and can send him to a REALLY good school in Bogota, it's expensive for her but it's possible. Here to duplicate THAT quality of education would cost $20k a year or more, which is just impossible for most mortal humans.
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yes i meant 5 ton freightliner trucks, 10 forward speed, 2 reverse, alum 23" wheels, sleeps 2, room for my laptop, fridge and tv... if truck drivers stopped all of a sudden the us and canada would come to a screeching halt! only about 30% of the freight in america moves by train, its just too slow.
the passenger trains are deathly slow, that's why people don't use it. if we had a high speed rail system like they have throughout most of europe and japan, things would be different.
i had fun driving trucks, i may do it again. i can't think of an easier way to make 35k or more a year.
i love cars, i have 2 bikes, what's wrong with that? i do this with my cars -
[url]http://s2.***********.com/albums/y20/djfourmoney/?action=view¤t=13.flv[/url]
red car on the left...
i don't know why mmbmmb thinks we are generalizing, some of the things we say are generalizations but not far from reality.
i can't escape the fact that i connect with european women on a different level than american women. clearly you haven't been through the lower 48 states. i much rather stay here and i really, really don't care what most people's personal views on our state are. yeah the ground moves, it moved on sunday. it moves all the time, you don't always feel it.
i don't see the purpose in moving to say nebraska just to find a woman.
have you been to nebraska???
to visit is fine, to live..... not for a city boy like me!
bango -
i don't think marrying foreign woman is an answer either. however for some of us, i feel its our only shot at happiness. i wouldn't worry about it either, enough american and canadian men are brainwashed into thinking this is the only place they should be looking for a mate.
i don't know what i have to tell mmbmmb that dating here for me is a complete lost cause. i don't like the women i have available to me. just what am i suppose to do with that, make lemonade out of lemons???
i already tried that.
i don't want to date single mothers (not ideal but...)
i don't want to date bbw's (been there, done that)
i don't want to date women older than me (for obvious reasons)
so as krs-one once say "so what the fuck am i suppose to do?"
i'll tell you what i'm going to do.
i'm going to put the 2-3 german single mothers on the backburner and seek some childless, younger and single women. american women 25-30 think i'm too old, you said it yourself mmbmmb you don't mind a 15 year age difference. i'm only shooting for 10-12 years. any younger than that is just too young imho.
is that horrible???
the women here childless and over 30 are that way for reasons i don't always agree with and i wouldn't want to get trapped into a relationship with them anyway.
not looking doesn't work for me either. if i don't look, i don't hang around in areas where women are always and the women i currently work with, well, hell no!
i don't think all aw are generally horrible, but the bad ones out number the good ones!
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2 photos
I don’t know why but the links don’t work, both mine and yours.
Anyway now I understand what kind of truck you talked about (the photo number 1) I thought that you meant the car from the second photo. It’s also described as a truck, at least in internet.
It doesn’t change the fact that the both are too big for someone who’s 5,2, wearing a hat ;-)
[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]I think America as a country and as a culture (if one could even say America really has a culture in the same way a place like Poland has), is suffering like it never has before in its history, and it's not really a problem with women, it is a combination of deep rooted problems with its cultural institutions. I think part of the problem is the car, like you pointed out, people are just FASCINATED with it here, which is something I never understood, I love my bicycle! :P but part of it also is that people have very unrealistic expectations of each other here, both women AND men.[/QUOTE]Well, so here’s the problem, not because AW are greedy, bitchy, overweight, picky, ugly, unfaithful and so on. All these features are only the symptoms.
[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]I don't think too many AM are going to solve the problems by marrying foreign women either, because the expectations are still artificially high, and eventually ANY woman is going to fall short, in many cases.[/QUOTE]Truth because if you don’t respect your partner (or you look for a submissive toy) it won’t help even if your girl is from Mars or an other planet of Solar System.
[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]Also the big problem between two people from two different countries and two different cultures is that unless you are really really well off financially you have to live in ONE country which means that generally the person who moves is going to have to learn a new culture. First off, that means there is a very real danger of sometimes very severe culture shock. This is especially a big deal for Latin American women coming up to Canada or the US. Many of them have only heard the positives of North America and none of the negatives, and they are totally mentally unprepared for what actually awaits them. Many women from Latin countries come up here for the first time and just BURST INTO TEARS at what they see, especially if they were actually from a nice middle-class neighborhood in some South American city and they wind up living somewhere real gritty up here. Not to mention the loss of closeness to family and friends etc. it can be a big problem
[/QUOTE]I agree but one could write a book about it. Latin American women aren’t the only ones who have to go through it. That’s way my polish friends call me “stupid”. They simply think that US looks like in TV. I have to admit that US have a very good propagandistic machine called Hollywood. Don’t get me wrong. United States has its own disadvantages and advantages, like every country. But for sure it’s not a paradise where you’ll change into a millionaire already at the airport
[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]And personally I have never complained about AW using men IN THAT WAY. There are some big cultural differences at work here.[/QUOTE]I wrote about AW here because I meant that they “sell” you fantasy about happiness and after you end with an empty bank account after divorce. This is what I meant. Your fiancée, as AW, sell fantasy but in her case you know in advance what you can expect (if you’re not a naïve idiot). You know that it’s just her work. If it’s about AW, you really believe that she loves you even if it’s only an illusion
[QUOTE=Paesano63]Married a Russian girl and brought her back to the US , mind you we were both in our 20's at the time, I thought it would really work. She divorced me and married a doctor (20 years senior), now she she's back in school, does no housework (has cleaners come in) and spends $100 on her haircuts, the typical spoiled american woman.
I agree with Jelly D, and by grounded, my feeling is that foreign women think in terms of "the family" and not themselves so much.
Men, absolutely are brought up to be the bread winners and having a good source of income is crucial for the support(house, cars, vacations, etc) , AW do not think of the family in the same respect, AW think( clothes, cosmetics, etc).
I was married to an AW, and now have a Panamanian GF, the difference in family values is mazing. My AW ex, now remarried, still not work, still goes to school at age 36, has house cleaners, and stops at the grocery store for a take out dinner. My Panamanian GF works, comes home cooks, and the kids help clean the house, it is a family effort.[/QUOTE]So your wife was from Russia, not Unites States? You mean that now she has the citizenship, yes? I guess you ex-Russian wife isn’t the best example of a girl “in family values”. I’m sure your Panamian girlfriend has a wonderful soul but you see that that the problem is in someone’s character not the nationality
[QUOTE=Paesano63]Sure there are probably some good AW, but it is so difficult to find amongst the rubble. AW as a group, think more of themselves than of a commitment to family. I work in an office and listen to the AW complain about their men. Apparently, us AM are not living up to what the AW are reading in their novels. Again, these AW are living in a world apart from reality of being part of a family.
[/QUOTE][QUOTE=DJ FourMoney]I don't know WHAT I have to tell Mmbmmb that dating here for me is a complete lost cause. I don't like the women I have available to me.[/QUOTE][QUOTE=DJ FourMoney]I don't think all AW are generally horrible, but the bad ones out number the good ones![/QUOTE]Ok gentlemen, let’s say I believe you. But before I’ll answer you “what the fuck you’re suppose to do” I want to ask you about something.
What AW answered you when you told them the same what you told to me? What was their argumentation?
[QUOTE=DJ FourMoney]Have you been to Nebraska?[/QUOTE]No, I haven’t. Neither in California. I was only on the east cost of US. That’s why I asked why California is better. I simply wasn’t there and I’d like to know the difference. And I don’t talk about climate but about relationships between men and women
[QUOTE=DJ FourMoney]American Women 25-30 think I'm too old, you said it yourself Mmbmmb you don't mind a 15 year age difference. I'm only shooting for 10-12 years. Any younger than that is just too young IMHO.Is that horrible?[/QUOTE]No, it’s not horrible. It’s a little similar to attitude of AW who want someone eg no more then 5 years older. If your attitude isn’t horrible, I also don’t think their expectations are.
And if it’s about me, I don’t mind if someone is 15 years older OR younger then me because I look what this man has in his head, not what he has in ID
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[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]Mmb:
FourMoney was talking about driving a truck, a 5 ton truck with 18 wheels and 40 feet long carrying goods across the country. We not only don't use trains much to transport people, we don't use them much for freight either!
And personally I have never complained about AW using men IN THAT WAY. There are some big cultural differences at work here.
My biggest problem with my AW wife whom I divorced was simply that she couldn't accept me as the person that I am and felt she needed to change me. My current fiancée would cut off both her breasts before she would do something like this, and I feel the same way towards her. I want her to be herself forever and only want to help her change the things about her that SHE wants to change.
And yes her job is extremely difficult. It affects her sex drive of course, because she is not made of wood, she has REAL orgasms while she's working and that tires her out. Her work is very physically demanding in many surprising ways, and because of all that she probably won't be working at it full time for the rest of her life. But there are positives about it too, she gets to work on her languages, especially English, and she gets an insight few of us have into human nature.
I actually have the highest respect for women who work in the sex industry in any way. I think many of them are the wisest people on the planet.
I think America as a country and as a culture (if one could even say America really has a culture in the same way a place like Poland has), is suffering like it never has before in its history, and it's not really a problem with women, it is a combination of deep rooted problems with its cultural institutions. I think part of the problem is the car, like you pointed out, people are just FASCINATED with it here, which is something I never understood, I love my bicycle! :P but part of it also is that people have very unrealistic expectations of each other here, both women AND men.
I don't think too many AM are going to solve the problems by marrying foreign women either, because the expectations are still artificially high, and eventually ANY woman is going to fall short, in many cases. Likewise, I think many foreign women actually DO believe bullshit like 'American men don't cheat' etc. and they hold a lot of myths that can be dangerous.
Also the big problem between two people from two different countries and two different cultures is that unless you are really really well off financially you have to live in ONE country which means that generally the person who moves is going to have to learn a new culture. First off, that means there is a very real danger of sometimes very severe culture shock.
This is especially a big deal for Latin American women coming up to Canada or the US. Many of them have only heard the positives of North America and none of the negatives, and they are totally mentally unprepared for what actually awaits them. Many women from Latin countries come up here for the first time and just BURST INTO TEARS at what they see, especially if they were actually from a nice middle-class neighborhood in some South American city and they wind up living somewhere real gritty up here. Not to mention the loss of closeness to family and friends etc. it can be a big problem.
That is one of the many reasons I'm moving to Bogota to be with my girl, instead of she up here with me. Fortunately in my case I've been hanging out with Colombians for the past 12-13 years or so, already speak the language well, and have a good handle on the culture.
NYC may not exactly be hell on Earth, hell, I still consider it the best part of the whole USA, but for her it would be a horrible experience. The dirt, the rats, the garbage etc. all doesn't bother me but it would drive her up the wall! Not to mention she has a son and can send him to a REALLY good school in Bogota, it's expensive for her but it's possible. Here to duplicate THAT quality of education would cost $20k a year or more, which is just impossible for most mortal humans.[/QUOTE]
America is definitey suffering a major crisis that it never has in the past, not really an economic one, but a cultural and moral one that would eventually effect its economic and political future. There is a lot of unprecedented competition around the world for global supremacy, coming from Asia and Europe, this is happening at a time when the American culture, particularly its youth culture is failing to produce strong leaders. The feminists have completely castrated the American male to be completely useless in a very chaotic world this is dangerous.
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the same page....
[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]
This is especially a big deal for Latin American women coming up to Canada or the US. Many of them have only heard the positives of North America and none of the negatives, and they are totally mentally unprepared for what actually awaits them. Many women from Latin countries come up here for the first time and just BURST INTO TEARS at what they see, especially if they were actually from a nice middle-class neighborhood in some South American city and they wind up living somewhere real gritty up here. Not to mention the loss of closeness to family and friends etc. it can be a big problem.
That is one of the many reasons I'm moving to Bogota to be with my girl, instead of she up here with me. Fortunately in my case I've been hanging out with Colombians for the past 12-13 years or so, already speak the language well, and have a good handle on the culture.
NYC may not exactly be hell on Earth, hell, I still consider it the best part of the whole USA, but for her it would be a horrible experience. The dirt, the rats, the garbage etc. all doesn't bother me but it would drive her up the wall! Not to mention she has a son and can send him to a REALLY good school in Bogota, it's expensive for her but it's possible. Here to duplicate THAT quality of education would cost $20k a year or more, which is just impossible for most mortal humans.[/QUOTE]
Exactly! You've thought all this stuff through. It sounds like you're a few years ahead of me in terms of making it happen. I hope you'll keep updating the board when you move to Bogota. It sounds like you've already laid the groundwork and know most everything to expect.
I can't remember where it is on this board, probably the Bogota thread, but Straight Shooter wrote a report called "Hope This Will Explain Life Here Compared To The United States" which discusses life in Bogota for an ex-pat. It seems like the most common-sense way to move through life.
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Bango spend a good amount of time in another city, one with a reputation for a good quality of life, I moved to Sydney from New York City, I absolutely love Sydney but wouldn't go to NYC if you gave me $10 million(well maybe).
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When you bring up any of the subjects to American Woman -
They Say: [i]Housework is beneath them[/i]
If your at home all fricken day what else are you SUPPOSE to be doing???
They Say: [i]I don't need a man, but if the right one came along it would be nice...[/i]
Career and Status are more important to most women. So they go to school, work hard and make it to the top. Around 35 their lives are empty and the biological clock is forever ticking. So they RUSH to find somebody like themselves.
When they can't find a male carbon-copy, they claim "There Are No Good Men Left"
That's UTTER BULLSHIT!
California isn't better, its actually WORST from a relationship stand point. The woman have Stars and Dollar Signs in their eyes. If your game is tight, can flash some green, get seats next to Jack at the Laker games or down 1st base line at Dodger Stadium, you're cell phone will hardly stop ringin and you'll have a selection of women from East Coast, NoCal and the Mid West.
FSU Women already here have a small network. I dated a Hungarian girl about this time last year. For whatever reason she dissed me. I dunno, just didn't click I guess. I did hit it, twice so it wasn't a complete LOST.
But she's the only non-American woman I have dated in the last 11 months.
I did meet a 41 year old divorced woman with style reminiscent of the 90's. She has financial problems and frankly I don't wanna be apart of that, while she struggles to pay her mortgage.
The only other girl I have had more than one conversation wanted to spend more time with her dog than me.
Oh I also can't forget the overweight single mother of 3 that couldn't seem to find time to meet me either.
Whatever it is I'm doing here its not working.
Its time to take my "act" overseas. The Hungarian took a brother shopping (I paid!), cooked for a brother (more than once) and even cut my hair a couple of times.
Only my EX even approached that level of appreciation for her man, but she was from a small town in Arizona.
All younger than me by at least 8 years as well.
I'm doing the right thing for me. It might not be the right thing for somebody else.
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[QUOTE=DJ FourMoney]When you bring up any of the subjects to American Woman -
They Say: [i]Housework is beneath them[/i]
If your at home all fricken day what else are you SUPPOSE to be doing???
They Say: [i]I don't need a man, but if the right one came along it would be nice...[/i]
Career and Status are more important to most women. So they go to school, work hard and make it to the top. Around 35 their lives are empty and the biological clock is forever ticking. So they RUSH to find somebody like themselves.
When they can't find a male carbon-copy, they claim "There Are No Good Men Left"
[/QUOTE]Hmm, it’s interesting. At the beginning I didn’t know what to think because it’s not an argumentation which leads to a discussion but “a defense” or whishes.
I’d like to ask you DJ FourMoney, and you gentlemen, have you ever read a women’s magazine like “Cosmopolitan”, “Glamour” or “Elle”? Sometimes I buy them. I’m always astonished when I read them. The amount of commercials, full of beautiful girls who aren’t real, is huge. Anyone can’t equal such ideal:
[url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qE0owrvLIQo[/url]
But I like reading there articles about fashion, make-up etc. Sometimes interviews with different people but most of them are simply not interesting. Anyway articles about relationships, sex, psychological problems etc. are the most frightening in these magazines. You can find there for example “a guy decoder” or read “guy-advice guru” who answers the reader’s questions. Let me copy some question for you:
-"I hate my boyfriend's best friend! What should I do?"
-"Does my boyfriend's online chatting count as cheating?"
-"Should I go to a strip club with my boyfriend?"
-"He's a guy — shouldn't he be wanting sex all the time?"
-"Is it a mistake to have sex on the first date?"
-"How can I get him to do what I want to do?"
- "Why won't he do the laundry like I asked?"
- "Why does he get so naughty during sex?"
-"Why doesn't he care about the wedding?"
-"How can I convince the guy I went home with that I'm not a sl*t?"
-“His weird seduction moves turn me off"
-"I think my boyfriend is gay"
-"How do I tell my guy I'm a 25-year-old virgin without freaking him out?"
-"I make a lot more money than my man does"
- "My guy and my mom have more in common than he and I do"
-"Why do I always get dumped after the third date?"
Ok, it’s enough gentlemen. Am I the only one person who has impression that I don’t read magazines for adult people but for teenagers?
The message all media try to give people, especially women, is simple. If you want o be “a hot chick” you have to buy a handbag from Gucci, to look like Lindsay Lohan, to work as a model, to sleep with everyone who’s famous(=in fashion) and to spend holidays in Paris. And when you have it all you’ll be happy. There’s no deeper reflection what it is “happiness”. Sex is like drinking a Starbucks’s coffee. They don’t write about any STD ( only how not to get pregnant) or the influence of sex into psyche (your and your partner’s one). Sleeping with 5 guys at the same time is normal. When they write about beauty they only advice what kind of cream you have to buy, not that beauty is also in your attitude to life.
Do you know what I want to say gentlemen? That the only one pattern of happiness is being of extra slim model with Moschino’s coat who drinks caramel frappuccino. And money for all this stuff you have from 1) your man or rich daddy/family 2) salary for photo session or 3) inheritance.
And people believe in that. Another problem is that many women think they should be perfect in everything. (It’s hard to look like Paris Hilton if you have 3 kids and you work from 8 to 18 o’clock) But nobody can. You can’t be the best employee, mother, wife, sister, friend 24/7 etc. because it’s even the faster way to get a heart attack then sex with Polvo ;-)
They think that if they work harder and they demand more they will be happy one day. The problem is that if we can’t enjoy our lives now we probably won’t enjoy them in the future. It doesn’t matter how rich we will be.
I think Bango Cheito was right writing “I think America as a country and as a culture (if one could even say America really has a culture in the same way a place like Poland has), is suffering like it never has before in its history, and it's not really a problem with women, it is a combination of deep rooted problems with its cultural institutions.”.
We already wrote about eg consumerism, greed, materialism, selfishness. And it’s not only a problem of US.
CBGBConnisur wrote ” I made my post about the petrodollar, it has continued to fall, so much that in Europe an American official was questioned by the press as to what the hell is happening. Ask Fan Gang from China about what he thinks about the US Dollar”.
In a few years, maybe 10, maybe 15, you’ll see what will happen to all those “paradises full of good women” when economy of their countries is better. If someone can’t respect an other person now, he/she will never do this. It has nothing to do with money. I respect a dustman and his work because without it I would live in a dump. But there are people who say “He’s only a dustman. I won’t talk to him” or people who say ”He’s only a stupid, fat American. What he can know?”
And now: “what the fuck you’re suppose to do”
Well, DJ FourMoney, if your situation in US seems so hopeless you should go overseas. I think it’s the only one way to find out if the foreign women are better for you. If they aren’t, at least you will visit some places, you’ll meet new people and you won’t regret: “I didn’t even try”.
Anyway I hope you’ll be happy and you’ll find what you are looking for. I wish you luck.
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[QUOTE=CBGBConnisur]Bango spend a good amount of time in another city, one with a reputation for a good quality of life, I moved to Sydney from New York City, I absolutely love Sydney but wouldn't go to NYC if you gave me $10 million(well maybe).[/QUOTE]
I lived 6 years in Toronto before NYC. And NYC is MUCH better than Toronto. Toronto has worse air pollution, worse water, worse traffic, higher taxes, AND more crime to boot! TO has a better reputation than NY as a city but it's TOTALLY UNDESERVED IMO.
I've been all over the US too. I hate it. I like riding my bicycle, and taking transit I HATE cars and can't stand driving. In most of the US you have no choice but to get a car and drive if you ever wanna get anywhere.
I'm moving to Bogota, which has a HORRIBLE reputation as a city but actually is a quite nice place. It has a great climate, great food, great public transpotation (AND bike paths), incredible nightlife and people, the cost of living is super cheap, even by shitty local economic standards, it's probably the most underrated place on Earth. Of course even 10 years ago it was still a total dump, dangerous and choked with some of the world's worst traffic and air pollution.
Not to mention, the whole city just SCREAMS sex, kind of like NYC did back in the day. Of course I wouldn't recommend it for just anyone, especially if you don't have a great command of Spanish, you'll totally miss out on everything there without it!