Thai Women - Opinions & Advice

[Bob Down]

Unlikely to be a joke! Will you go without for a year? I doubt it, especially if it is handed to you on a plate. Why should she? Women used to be about keeping their men happy, but nowadays they consider themselves, and unless there is something wrong with her, she will have a hungry pussy many times during the next year!

There are 10 Thai girls in my village with either husband or boyfriend away, all sending money regularly. And every one of them has another man! As Trink would say TIT

My girl may or may not have a gig, I am not to know or care. I know enough to know it is a possiblity. Maybe OTH's girl also has a gig as may Mick Lickers girl, can either of them be sure. I have meet a number of girls in my travels that have foreign husbands and local boyfriends, I even know a girl that has two Thai boyfriends in the same city.

But in saying that I know girls that are only interested in have one husband/boyfriend. It all depends on the girl I guess.

[M P Lurker]

Probably 1 million + occasional prostitutes - ie once a month or less. Regular prostitutes, (full time bar, massage or brothel workers) and street girls likely to be around 500,000.

In western society we have a lot of girls who just go out and pick someone up for some casual sex.

I think this is less prevalent in Thailand (due to culture). So the majority of girls going to a pick up place will be looking for some financial help (and needing it). And yet these girls can be very choosy about who they go with, in many cases going empty handed because they didn't like the guys who approached.

In many cases no money was discussed with me at all. They were too shy. On the other hand they did not refuse to accept money when leaving and sometimes were surprised that I was reasonably generous. Many of these girls were very much part timers and only going out when short of money. So there are very large numbers of casual P4P girls that have regular jobs as well (or maybe between jobs) and may well be able to keep their P4P status secret. However girls will often be suspected of being some old man's 2nd wife (or 3rd).

One Thai girl I know, who has lived abroad for many years, picked up a Thai man in a BKK club, and although she wasn't expecting him to pay, was very shocked when found that he was expecting her to pay. She claimed he was lousy too.

[Old Thai Hand]

Wow. So I guess by sticking with the 'official' number of 75,000, they're only really admitting to the existence of the Farang-oriented industry, not the local industry?

Do you think that's just a cheeky attempt to make the 'problem' look smaller than it is, or is there perhaps a distinction made in Thai society between the Farang market and the Thai market? You know...servicing tourists seen as more of a commercial enterprise, whereas women (of a certain class) servicing locals is, I don't know, an expectation? A duty? A tradition?

The Thais like to blame the Farang for the existence of the sex industry. The visibility of it makes it quite easy to point a finger. Ironically, the power elite own large segments of the sex industry, have made their wealth from it and the true origins, if one wants to point a finger can be laid at the feet of the Chinese.

As an interesting sidebar, the Thais had brothels attached to their temples 500 years ago. Of course, revisionist historians and cultural defenders don't like to be reminded of this.

Actually, on that note, is there a difference in the way sex workers are treated in Thai society depending on whether they work in the Farang or Thai sectors?

The ones from the Farang-oriented industry might be treated better on the surface because they have money. But, just below the surface, they are universally vilified by all levels of Thai society. Such is Thai hypocricy.

[Bumholes1]

Actually, on that note, is there a difference in the way sex workers are treated in Thai society depending on whether they work in the Farang or Thai sectors?

Probably.

It seems to be the ones who work in the farang sector, who have money, build nice homes in their villages, provide family with motorbikes etc. They are the ones who are accepted in their villages. Those that work in the Thai sector generally hide the fact, since they have nothing much to show for it, and merely eke out a basic living.

[Rubber Nursey]

2,000,000 at one time. It remains the current estimate of the number of active prostitutes in the country.

Wow. So I guess by sticking with the 'official' number of 75,000, they're only really admitting to the existence of the Farang-oriented industry, not the local industry?

Do you think that's just a cheeky attempt to make the 'problem' look smaller than it is, or is there perhaps a distinction made in Thai society between the Farang market and the Thai market? You know...servicing tourists seen as more of a commercial enterprise, whereas women (of a certain class) servicing locals is, I don't know, an expectation? A duty? A tradition?

Actually, on that note, is there a difference in the way sex workers are treated in Thai society depending on whether they work in the Farang or Thai sectors?

[Bumholes1]

2,000,000 at one time. It remains the current estimate of the number of active prostitutes in the country.

Probably 1 million + occasional prostitutes - ie once a month or less. Regular prostitutes, (full time bar, massage or brothel workers) and street girls likely to be around 500,000.

[Old Thai Hand]

Was that 2,000,000 an 'at any one time' figure, or an 'over a certain period of time' figure?

2,000,000 at one time. It remains the current estimate of the number of active prostitutes in the country.

[Rubber Nursey]

In a typical Thai move, they called the study 'faulty' and shelved it. Of course, the empirical evidence was beyond doubt. But, they simply ignored it.

That's exactly why I said in my earlier post that I have very little faith in prostitution research. Maybe I should have qualified that as 'available' or 'published' prostitution research. Soooo many studies never see the light of day because their findings are contrary to the popular understanding of sex work, or because someone high-up might end up with that same egg on their face. Most available research is highly subjective or down-right biased and unethical.

Interesting that the Thai Govt prefers to underestimate the size of their sex industry. (Over here, numbers are routinely OVERestimated). Thailand is considered both a source and destination country for trafficking by the US TIP report and would likely be under a lot of pressure to prove they're doing something to rectify the situation. That report is causing a lot of Asian countries to fudge numbers, deny problems and launch aggressive campaigns against the sex industry. Which, of course, only increases the risk of trafficking and other abuses occurring....but that's a whole other rant.

Was that 2,000,000 an 'at any one time' figure, or an 'over a certain period of time' figure? In case that doesn't make any sense, the estimated number of street-based sex workers in my city, over the course of a year, is around 200. But there are generally only between 5 and 10 street girls working at any one time. The transient nature of sex work can make firm numbers difficult to ascertain.

[Bumholes1]

She even joked about finding a gig as it will be almost a year before I see her again.

Unlikely to be a joke! Will you go without for a year? I doubt it, especially if it is handed to you on a plate. Why should she? Women used to be about keeping their men happy, but nowadays they consider themselves, and unless there is something wrong with her, she will have a hungry pussy many times during the next year!

There are 10 Thai girls in my village with either husband or boyfriend away, all sending money regularly. And every one of them has another man! As Trink would say TIT

[Bob Down]

Only a couple of times. Once I got caught red handed taking a girl from Thermae. The receptionst at the hotel was a friend of my GF and knew who I was even though I had no Ideas she knew my GF. First thing she did was call my GF and bust me. TGF was mad for a couple of days, then moved off the issue and has never broughjt it up since. Ever since that episode I have stuck to high end escort agencies and five star hotels to ensure something similar doesn't happen again.

My question for you is: how do you know that your Thai GF isn't doing the same thing you are?

Good question, I have no answer to that. She lied to her own mother about spending the night with me. Told her mother she was on a girls night out. So if she can lie to her own mother she can lie to me too. I am still working on the is she playing me or not.

She even joked about finding a gig as it will be almost a year before I see her again.

There is only one girl in BKK that I trust and she is already taken, she is very much inlove with her man and is a good source of advice about all things Thai, she is even happy to introduce me to her girlfriend even if she knows I see bargirls.

Still yet to meet the girlfriend. Have seen pictures and she is kind of cute.

[Mauldid]

Having lived in HK and Korea for about 2 years now I find that alot of Asian girls do not pluck their light mustache. This is more even true for Thai girls. I have seen some of the most beautiful girls (not ladyboys) with a light upper lip hair that is really noticeable from their profile. Both young and older gals are sporting it like it was in style. Even a good Thai friend of mine in HK has this mustache. I want to tell her about it but might be to offensive even for a friend to say. So what do you guys think. Remember these are not katoey but real ladies.

[Old Thai Hand]

PS: OTH - Can I ask why your colleague was commissioned to do that research? What had the Govt originally hoped to establish?

A lot of times, the Thai government commissions studies because there's money that has to be spent, not because anyone is really interested in the results.

But, in this case I think they were originally trying to prove that prostitution wasn't nearly as pervasive or as bad as the NGOs were saying. They ended up with egg on their faces. For example, they have always stuck to the official figure of 75,000 as the number of prostitutes in Thailand. The NGOs have always maintained its around 2,000,000 and my colleague's study supported that latter figure, which alone pissed off the government. In a typical Thai move, they called the study 'faulty' and shelved it. Of course, the empirical evidence was beyond doubt. But, they simply ignored it.

[Rubber Nursey]

it's about the best 'new start' (with mostly people who don't know their backgrounds) that they will ever get, and most of them are clever enough to take it.

in just the past few months, three australian school teachers and two police officers have been discovered, fired and then humiliated in the national media for being ex-hookers. and all in states where sex work is legal! you can imagine the message this sends to current hookers considering leaving the industry, or to ex-workers now working in 'respected' fields. it can stop you applying for those sorts of jobs at all, leaving you to choose between a 'safe' (usually low paying) job like retail or hospitality, or staying in the sex industry.

as you said, the best new start is in a place where people don't know your background, which brings with it another set of problems. it often means starting fresh in an unfamiliar environment, with limited social support networks. it's imperative that exit strategies include additional resources for confidential peer support services, because if the girls don't feel like they can manage in the 'real world', they'll head straight back to the world they know.

the people most in need of viable employment alternatives - like the women that oth talked about, working in exploitative conditions - often have the most barriers to participation. they likely have fewer social supports, lower levels of education and may be suffering the effects of violence and trauma, like low self-esteem or social phobias. being 'low end' providers, they've probably had more contact with the police and might have criminal records. in my understanding, they're also more likely to have been servicing local men (correct me if i'm wrong) or maybe working the streets, so they'd have more risk of being recognised. these women will not survive in the real world if you just hand them a new job and leave them to their own devices.

governments and ngos never look at the big picture issues, which is why so many re-education/rehabilitation programs around the world have failed. again, it's about whether they're doing it for the welfare of sex workers, or just to reduce sex industry numbers (who cares how they cope, so long as they're gone).

ps: oth - can i ask why your colleague was commissioned to do that research? what had the govt originally hoped to establish?

[Terry Terrier]

They try, OTH. They keep their ear to the ground and their finger on the pulse and try very hard to be aware of, and support, women from all over the Thai sex industry. But when I originally referred to Empower, I was talking about a specific issue. Trafficking and sex slavery are very different to exit and re-training and/or preventing women entering the sex industry. Empower does not support the latest efforts by the Thai Govt because of the potential negative impact on current sex workers and I respect their assessment as experts in their field. But either way, exit programs will not prevent traffickers exploiting and abusing women. Providing alternative employment MAY give local women options other than entering prostitution themselves or engaging middle men to find them work, but it won't stop situations where girls are bought and sold into prostitution (the potential financial rewards are just too large compared to 'regular' work), nor will it stop women from outside Thailand being smuggled into the country. The two issues have to be looked at separately.

My problem with this (and every other 'eradication' method employed by every other country) is that it's simply a bandaid solution. It's treatment for a symptom, rather than a cure for the illness. It doesn't address ANY of the larger problems associated with leaving the industry. For example, one of the primary things that these sorts of initiatives usually ignore, is the stigma associated with being an ex-hooker. Even in my own country, you can train and re-skill a sex worker all you like, but the gaps in her resume, the paper trail detailing her brothel employment, or the prostitution convictions on her record, will always brand her as a wh*re and jeopardise her chances of regular employment. With the added issues of class and 'face' in Asian countries, I can only imagine the difficulties Thai hookers face when trying to leave sex work.

The Thai Government needs to introduce anti-discrimination legislation. They need to stop taking down names and/or arresting sex workers. They need to stop police going to villages and blackmailing ex-sex workers under threat of disclosure. And they need to do all this at the same time as they start offering sex workers alternative employment, because without these protections, ex-hookers cannot survive in the real world. Governments and abolitionist NGOs need to stop focusing on the 'sex' part of sex work and start taking a more wholistic view. It's just not as simple as offering someone another job.

That's a good, informative post, Rubber Nursey. It goes some way to explaining why the vast majority of ex-bargirls in my home region live normal non-prostitution lifestyles: It's about the best 'new start' (with mostly people who don't know their backgrounds) that they will ever get, and most of them are clever enough to take it.

[Retired Army]

I wanted to know if you ever needed to go elsewhere for sex, I was in Philippines last week for a holiday but failed to tell my TG I was going. Had to admit I was not at home, she had decided by herself I was there fucking around without any help from me. She knows I have friends in Philippines she doesn't know they are bargirls. But to her any female friend must be a fuck buddy.

I have a few thai girls I chat to online, some very flirty and like to play the field. Others are definitely one man girls and their men will definitely be one girl guys.

I guess every girl has their own idea as to what is acceptable and what is not.

PS. she is still talking to me even if I failed to take her on holiday with me or spend my holiday with her. I will be back in BKK later this year to see her.

Only a couple of times. Once I got caught red handed taking a girl from Thermae. The receptionst at the hotel was a friend of my GF and knew who I was even though I had no Ideas she knew my GF. First thing she did was call my GF and bust me. TGF was mad for a couple of days, then moved off the issue and has never broughjt it up since. Ever since that episode I have stuck to high end escort agencies and five star hotels to ensure something similar doesn't happen again.

My question for you is: how do you know that your Thai GF isn't doing the same thing you are?