American Women

[PsyberZombie]

the following is from an advice column in the most recent edition of a tabloid called the new york press =

how many hookers have the horndogs hired?

by judy mcguire
dategirl@nypress.com

i've had girlfriends, and now a wife, but i've never been with a
pro. drawing on your extensive research, can you tell me how those
experiences differ from dating or marital sex? is it the attraction
of the illicit, or just the desire of a professional to please a
client, or is there something more to it?

—name withheld

there are about a million different reasons one decides to go the
pay-for-play route. a girlfriend of mine hired a variety of male
escorts in order to get back at her philandering husband. another
pal is very specific about his physical specifications—he likes big
butts and he cannot lie! he can't always find these qualities in
the women he dates, so he occasionally leases.

the rent-girl/boy's appeal is obvious; an attractive someone comes
over to your apartment (or, even better, a hotel), you give him/her
an agreed-upon fee, he/she gives you an orgasm. there's no need to
sit through his band's cd or feign interest in her extensive
collection of troll figurines. you both know what you're there for,
so you don't have to engage in that sometimes exciting, but
all-too-often-exhausting, mating dance.

we womenfolk like to think it's just the grotesquely disfigured
fella who's hiring all those hookers. you know, the man so
physically repulsive it renders him completely unfuckable by all
but the most strong-stomached and well-paid professionals. but
contrary to what we ladies might want to think, these poor souls
are the minority. lots of guys—lots of perfectly good looking,
normal guys—either have paid or will pay for sex at some point in
their life.

it's not like you can tell a potential hooker-hirer just by looking
at him. sure, some guys are easy—the leghumping douchebag you
caught peeking through the crack in the ladies room door, the
asshole misogynist who works in sales, the cripplingly shy nerd who
walks your dog—these guys are all likely candidates. but what about
that sweet elderly gentleman who's dating your aunt sarah? he may
be ponying up sawbucks to have an **** tranny take a crap in
his mouth.

then there's the dude who wants what he wants when he wants it.
when he decides he'd like a little oral action and he's either
temporarily single, or out of town or in the mood for a redhead
instead of a blonde, he dials 1-800-blowjob, much in the way he
orders a new pair of pants. for him everything boils down to
commerce, and he gives getting laid about as much thought as he
does getting a boil lanced.

of course there are the scamps who get off on the thrill of doing
something naughty. much like so many young girls think themselves
all scandalous by playing lesbian 'til graduation, these guys will
eventually grow up and realize that there's really very little that
will shock anyone anymore.

then again, there are the women-haters who feel that at base all
dames are *****s anyway, but i like to think that there aren't too
many of them.

some johns are just bored and horny, still others have a kink
that's not easily negotiated in "mainstream" society. i mean, there
are women who won't put a dick in their mouths. imagine what
happens to a guy who is really out there in terms of what gets him
hot? can you understand how frightening it is for the average guy
to tell his new girlfriend he can only get off if he's dressed in
full stinky [CodeWord131], with a ball gag in his mouth, the soundtrack
from diva on volume 11, all the lights on and the curtains open? at
best, your average woman would think him a freak; at worst, she's
laughing at him, then running out the door while screaming. but
with a hired helping hand, he doesn't have this worry because
anything that he could possibly cook up, there's no doubt she's
seen weirder.


volume 18, issue 9

©2005 all rights reserved.
no part of this website may be reproduced in any manner without
written permission of the publisher yeah right


http://nypress.com/18/9/news&columns/dategirl.cfm

[Smut Villain]

Mike12, it's precisely that kind of bullshit that makes me think: "You say you want a gentleman, but you treat him like a fucking butler when you meet him! When you meet a shark in dolphin's clothing, you run to him like a mindless lemming and WONDER why your heart has been gutted from your chest cavity!" IN-FUCKING-CREDIBLE!

Sinanju,

It's called LOGIC. The problem is not that women can't think logically- it's that they often don't.

[Sinanju Master]

Mike12, it's precisely that kind of bullshit that makes me think: "You say you want a gentleman, but you treat him like a fucking butler when you meet him! When you meet a shark in dolphin's clothing, you run to him like a mindless lemming and WONDER why your heart has been gutted from your chest cavity!" IN-FUCKING-CREDIBLE!

[PsyberZombie]

Confucious say =

" Women's panties not best thing in world , but next to it !! "

Confucious also say =

" Man who put cream in tart not necessarily baker "

[Mike12]

Lots of good posts here, funny, informative, and right to the point. Makes for good reading and learning all around.

On the subject of games, come on now, most women love them. They play games, act like drama queens, and throw invisible gauntlets down for the man to surpass in their mind. Why do you think women love soap operas, Housewives, Sex and the City, and gossip magazines. They can include this drama in their lives by manifesting it in Games. Create drama to feel like they are a character out of Sex and the city. I was a participant in "The Life and Times of a NYC Courtesan" starring ..... ..... until I wised up before my wallet went bust. When I was straight up with no games and just a gentleman it got me nowhere. Now that I can dish out the business, things are more on an equal level. It's a shame though. When traveling to other countries I get by on my own merits with no games for the most part.

Have a friend that pulls lots of chicks. The way he does it is by maintaining the big willie rap star image. He's got the fur coat, bling bling, Prada shirt, luxury cars, etc etc. Pulled one aspiring model type by telling her "you might have seen me in a 50cent video". Another one by flashing cash, and still more by alluding to big money connects and entertainment hookups. Hey, Who can resist a non-threatening, cool, rapper type anyway? Most of these chicks are barracudas though, so it hard for him to keep their company. They have real ambitious goals like copping E, emulating Brittany, meeting rapstars, partying hard, driving Lexuses, and being shallow. I dealt with one dancer chick one time and her behaviour was such a turnoff I didn't even bang her when the chance came. He's a great guy, good looking, and real personable, but this is what he has to do to get with these girls.

[Sinanju Master]

LOL PZ, pearls of wisdom like THAT are why many sought the counsel of Confucius

[PsyberZombie]

Long Stroker wrote =

" Probably within 50 years, masculinity itself will be viewed as a vice, not a virtue, and assailed as a primary contributor to violence in society. Laws will be passed, re-education camps will be formed, where men get together to "talk about their feelings" in order to coerce the last bit of manhood out of them. "

Can we guys get together to "talk about our feelings" at the local Strip Club ??

Better still = how about at the local Brothel ??

If so , Count ME In !!

Confucious say :

" Wife who send Husband to Dog House
... soon find him in Cat House "

[Joe Zop]

Gosh, yes, why, it sounds almost as bad as being seen as basically a baby factory and scullery maid...


And Larry Summers' primary point was that the expectations of the jobs -- which require single-minded focus, often to the detriment of family, were the greatest factor, with possible brain differences being secondary, and socialization and job discrimination pressures being third.

Yes, there are tons more women in the US workforce -- basically half of all workers. The AFL-CIO (also the source for the rest below) says that in 2000 17.8% of families were maintained by women, and that is definitely more than previously, when it was around half of that.

Now, I know I'm gonna get reamed for this but...

Before we start just throwing blame elsewhere, and saying marriage clearly doesn't work because women just don't need men, perhaps it's also time for men to admit their own complicity in the equation. The average husband does about 37% of the household labor, regardless of whether the wife works or not. Sixty percent of working women have full-time jobs, 63% of those work more than 40 hours per week, and 68% of working mothers work more than 40 hours. Americans are workaholics -- we average nine weeks more work in hours per year that do our brethren in Europe. And the vast majority of parents describe themselves as "used up" by the end of the workday. The truth is that guys simply can't lean on the "I'm the breadwinner so when I get home I deserve to relax and get what I want" argument any more because women are working every bit as much.

Here's the bottom line -- women in relationships with an equitable division of household labor are less prone to depression, more likely to be sexually attracted to their spouses and have better sexual relations.

To me, that's not an argument that women don't need men; it's an argument that they do.

[Sinanju Master]

Long Stroker, what you described is a science-fiction variant of Amazon society from ancient Greek mythology. Men were seen as the enemy and useful ONLY for propagating their society. Upon capture, they were killed either outright, or they were made to be sperm donors and THEN killed after they served their purpose.

I also see such a grim (distant?) future upon us; the eyes and minds of men are blinded and dulled while we are led around by the only part that seems to do the thinking for many of us. Being used only as a harvesting vessel and existing at the whim of someone who is IL-LOGICAL for about one week out of the month is scary as shit.

"Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you...."

[Rubber Nursey]

No need for sperm farms - there's always cloning if we want to have babies.

[Long Stroker]

While at the gym yesterday, I was doing some cardio on one of the recumbent bikes when the new song from American Idol winner Kelly Clarkson came on the radio. There was an audible increase in the level of chatter coming from a few college girls exercising behind me. When the chorus came on, they couldn't help but to sing along:

"Since you've been gone
I can breathe for the first time
I'm so movin on
Yeah, yeah
Thanks to you
Now I get
I get what I want
Since you've been gone"

It turns out that one of the best things ever to happen to Kelly Clarkson was breaking up with her wretched boyfriend. He probably did terrible, controlling things to her, like ask her for a BJ every once in a while. Now that he's gone, she can "breathe for the first time!" Here's to "movin on!"

All of which got me to thinking. It's exactly as a poster here recently said. It's not marriage that's the anachronism in 21st century America, it's the male species! Other than providing a paycheck (or simply being the paycheck, in many cases) there is no reason to need a man around anymore.

Harvard's president Larry Summers is under pressure because he (correctly) speculated that differences between male and female brains explain why there are few women at top universities in science and maths. The feminists are using this to point to yet another example of a glass ceiling in which women are held back from the high paying jobs. All of which is irrelevant, as this firestorm of controversy obscures that fact that within 10 years or less, many of the high-paying math and science jobs (which men excel at) will be gone, having been sent to India or China. All that will be left in this country will be soft social-skills jobs that require high degrees of personal interaction and empathy (which women excel at).

As women begin to earn more of the money and become the primary breadwinner in more and more households (it is happening today, look at the numbers) the importance of the male in the American family will furthur diminish. President Hillary is only the beginning.

Probably within 50 years, masculinity itself will be viewed as a vice, not a virtue, and assailed as a primary contributor to violence in society. Laws will be passed, re-education camps will be formed, where men get together to "talk about their feelings" in order to coerce the last bit of manhood out of them.

Even further into the future, one can imagine a worst-case-scenario where men are born in slavery, kept in pods contained in vast fields, and periodically harvested, milked if you will, of their sperm at the whim of the female rulers. Because, despite the female's greatest efforts, asexual reproduction is simply unachievable. However, when engaging in recreational intercourse with each other, the females will still rely on that old standby, the strap-on dildo. (beacause a tongue is no substitute for that feeling of fullness!)

Myself, I hope by then to either be retired to a 3rd world country or dead.

[PsyberZombie]

To : RN

While we all surely appreciate a woman's point of view here , there's one Basic Issue that's hard to over·look when we read your posts , RN =

This Board is about American Women ; and YOU are not American

Even though I'm not the most widely travelled guy here , I have been to many different countries and have three pass·ports full of stamps to prove it and one thing I've learned is that American Women are Unique in their out·look and attitudes towards life

Allow me , if you will , to re·post this Article on Thai Women and why American guys fall so hard for them [ "Farang" is Thai for "foreigner" ] =

" Farang men often fall madly in love with the first Thai girl they meet – even if she’s a rough street prostitute who doesn’t speak English. Love-sick farang men are queuing up at the altar to tie the knot with their dubious Thai mail-order brides but why don’t farang girls stir their passions in the same way?

Thai girls and farang girls could hardly be more different. Put simply, Thai girls are family-orientated and farang girls are increasingly career-orientated. In America, 44% of women aged 15 to 44 have chosen to remain childless and the trend is gathering pace. It’s easy to understand their point of view because, as men, we’ve always pursued our ambitions.

Farang girls enjoy opportunities that their Thai sisters can only dream about. In many ways, life in the West has never been better but it doesn’t seem to have translated into greater human happiness. We are witnessing an epidemic of relationship breakdown. Western men and women seem increasingly ill-matched and unhappy. Statistics reveal that dissatisfied western wives are divorcing their husbands in ever-increasing numbers and they can’t seem to find suitable replacements either. Does this mean that we farang fellas are all useless?

No, of course it doesn’t and I’m going to explain why. Despite the far-reaching changes in western society, the underlying attitudes of men and women remain broadly the same. Men still have a provider mentality and women still have an entitlement mentality. Men have always been attracted by youth and beauty and women have always been attracted by wealth and status. Inevitably, the mismatch between our utopian aspirations and the situation on the ground has created problems.

For the sake of his self-esteem, a man needs to be the breadwinner. Taking on the domestic role makes him feel like a failure. Women, on the other hand, feel uncomfortable in the role of provider. A woman would quickly lose respect for any man who appeared to be living off her. Women still feel entitled to a partner more successful than themselves. Consequently, the more successful a woman becomes, the harder it is to find someone suitable.

On the face of it, men are more easily satisfied. All a man needs is a girl who is cute and kind-hearted. Career status is unimportant – it’s her personal qualities that count. He needs to be her protector and hero. A brash career-orientated woman will never excite a man’s passion. If she’s pretty, he might humour her for long enough to get into her pants but a long-term relationship is unlikely to succeed.

Women who don’t touch a guy’s heart but who have soaring expectations are never going to find husbands. Men seeking unconditional love and respect from aggressive ladettes are never going to find wives. As a result, more people than ever are living lonely single lives between brief affairs. Throughout the western world, we are seeing explosive growth in the number of single person households. In the UK, for example, census data reveals that the number of single person households grew by 14% between 1991 and 2001. An unhappy world of selfish people living alone is now becoming reality.

Returning to the original question, I think that many farang men fall madly in love with a random Thai bar girl because they’ve never met a truly feminine woman before. Men feel a deep need to care for these needy fallen angels and to receive affection in return. Even when the affection is insincere, the compulsion is so great that few farang guys can resist. Thai girls play the role perfectly (See In praise of Thai girlfriends). They wield a power over men that their farang sisters have forgotten how to use. "

[Rubber Nursey]

Sinanju -- "I applaud any victory a man achieves in that fashion".

That is what disturbs me most about the conversations being held in this section. Call me old fashioned, but isn't love supposed to be a win-win situation? There shouldn't be a winner and a loser. If there is, then it seems one of you probably doesn't give a shit about the other - in which case, why the hell would you even be trying? Spite? Malice? To have another conquest to write about in your black book? Since when did love and attraction become a competition???

"You would be bored very quickly and looking for the guy who could keep you metaphorically (read: NOT NEGATIVELY) off-balance".

I don't like feeling 'off-balance'. I HATE feeling off-balance. I like to know exactly where I stand at all times. Fact is, I'm a very cynical, very jealous woman, with an overactive imagination. If my man takes that bit too long to return my calls, or acts cagey or does anything else that is too dramatically different to how he normally behaves for no obvious reason, I will start to worry. The more he puts me 'off-balance', the more I worry about his motives. Before long, I will have him written off in my head as a lying, cheating womaniser and I will be off looking for a young cutie to take my mind off him. Yes, I know that's not very grown-up behaviour - but neither is someone who apparently loves me 'treating me mean to keep me keen', as they say. There's a difference between keeping her interested and keeping her wondering. Nobody in a HEALTHY relationship should have to constantly wonder whether or not his/her partner gives a damn.

I think you're giving women way too much credit. We are already VERY insecure individuals. It doesn't take much to tip us over the edge.

[Rock Dog]

RN,

You're right of course. Lot's of guys will go after whatever girl is available just to get over their last flame. Use 'em then dump 'em once one's self esteem has been rebuilt.

We do it to women and the women do it to us.... each in our own particular way. Neither is admirable, but that's the way things are. I just happen to feel a bit more sorry for the guy who hangs in there, desperately hoping that the woman will give him a break.

Kind of like Charlie Brown hoping that Lucy won't pull back the football so that he can finally kick it instead of missing and landing on his ass every time.

Rock

[Sinanju Master]

RN, I don't ever remember begrudging a woman having the requirement of chemistry. It's that a lot of them say that they would give ANY suitor a "chance". They never state the requirements you did, which is why I hold their feet to the fire. That omission makes them appear blameless from the beginning, but when things turn bad, THEN they add the caveat. Even in our private conversations I don't remember EVER chiding you for turning up your nose at someone who didn't physically attract you or didn't stir your chemistry. If I ever DID, please produce the evidence. If a woman said UP FRONT the things you did about her requirements, that'd be cool and I would have no reason to chide her. HOWEVER, American women have mastered omission in order to manufacture the situation to make them come out smelling like a rose. As for men adopting underhanded techniques to make it with women, in early life, WOMEN BEGIN with a headstart on men in the arena of relationships and therefore develop more techniques of "guile". We are (admittedly) less developed as a whole in the arena of relationships than women and women KNOW THAT. The result is that they will take advantage of that fact and not feel ANY guilt about it WHATSOEVER. When a man engages in such underhanded behavior, it is no less abhorrent, BUT it is a lesser skilled participant playing catch-up to his more skilled opponent. I applaud any victory a man achieves in that fashion. It's wrong to feel that way, and if you truly want to bury the hatchet in my head, feel free to do so.

You seem like a cool chick who would be a great find, but I truly wonder if a man came at you with all the intangible requirements you described would last very long since you would have him all figured out in no time flat. You would be bored very quickly and looking for the guy who could keep you metaphorically (read: NOT NEGATIVELY) off-balance.

Accept my sharpening stone if you feel offended...