Other FKK Clubs

[ExpatLover]

I attended a open air psy trance party whole night in Hamburg. Got fed up with hustling taxi drivers so I walked back to central station and took the S-bahn, took me 2 hours. Room like a sauna, could not sleep. Decided to take my bicycle to FKK Romeo but bicycle was stolen.

Ok, give in and sit and cry in a corner all day or try to turn things?

I waited a bit, turned AC to max and took a really slow ride to Romeo. I really did not need any more car crushing.

When I arrived the reception told me they only had 3 girls today. Ok, lets give it a go.

Nr 1 lady I spoke to before, 36 year german lady, very nice and I have I nice memory when I had finnished a session in the kino and my girl had forgotten to bring paper. She asked this german if she had any, she tried to answer but was at the same time blowing another guy. Because of that her speech was a bit blurred sort of speak.

Looks a bit desperate or how to burn time and money when you are facing those kind of situations sometimes it is better to do other things than fucking or booking a escort can be a good alternative, getting sucked by a 36 YO probably 40+ German prostitute probably 20 years+ in the job, this is really not my cup of tea and I will not pay for that for sure.

[FuckedUpSwede]

I attended a open air psy trance party whole night in Hamburg. Got fed up with hustling taxi drivers so I walked back to central station and took the S-bahn, took me 2 hours. Room like a sauna, could not sleep. Decided to take my bicycle to FKK Romeo but bicycle was stolen.

Ok, give in and sit and cry in a corner all day or try to turn things?

I waited a bit, turned AC to max and took a really slow ride to Romeo. I really did not need any more car crushing.

When I arrived the reception told me they only had 3 girls today. Ok, lets give it a go.

Nr 1 lady I spoke to before, 36 year german lady, very nice and I have I nice memory when I had finnished a session in the kino and my girl had forgotten to bring paper. She asked this german if she had any, she tried to answer but was at the same time blowing another guy. Because of that her speech was a bit blurred sort of speak.

I told her that "do not speak with food in your mouth!" And everybody burst out in laughter. Fun evening.

Nr2 Romanian lady, very cute face, I did want to session her last time but had no power left.

Nr3. There was no Nr3? I asked about this and reception called her, she was sleeping and looked like she was about to kill me when she arrived! Turned out she had some trouble at home.

Day turn out I got a nice blowjob from nr 2 and completly covered Nr 3 in baby oil, from feet to neck I can proudly say.

My first impression lasts, I like this club, mostly because of the athmosphere and the relaxed and fun girls.

A Sunday in the middle of holidays is maybe not the best time if you like a good selection of girls.

[Sirioja]

Nice choice of vehicle! I have also a Lada Niva but the one that I drive in Germany for the moment is a GMC Suburban 4 x4 diesel from 1974 and it likes to mark its territory by pissing a cocktail of fluids on the ground when I park it. Maybe that would ruin the shoes for the richer mongers if they step on it on their way to the Mercedes-Benz so I prefer other parking.

I love smell of burned oil or too hot brakes. Even at expensive Globe, or Golden Time, they don t select about car.

[FuckedUpSwede]

I drive a legendary traban and plan to buy a tata, but no problem versus other cars and I just laugh under rain on autobahns when Germans drive in first gear, but I agree FKK is not the best place to enjoy good quality champagne. Even among Moet champagne, different quality sent to different places. Fortunately for clubs, Turkish give business to clubs buying bottles to drink whole night, less business for girls with them.

Nice choice of vehicle! I have also a Lada Niva but the one that I drive in Germany for the moment is a GMC Suburban 4 x4 diesel from 1974 and it likes to mark its territory by pissing a cocktail of fluids on the ground when I park it. Maybe that would ruin the shoes for the richer mongers if they step on it on their way to the Mercedes-Benz so I prefer other parking.

[Sirioja]

Thanks Tintin, Poly and Pistons, always nice to know someone like your reviews.

I do often see champagne bottles in the bars of FKK: s but this is the first time someone actually has tried to sell it to me. I like champagne but I would never pay ridiculous price for it. I am a simple worker with basic taste and average wage.

I normally park my "car" at a side street, and not at the FKK parking, because I do not think they would let me pass the gate if I park it beside the Porsches and Mercedes!

I drive a legendary traban and plan to buy a tata, but no problem versus other cars and I just laugh under rain on autobahns when Germans drive in first gear, but I agree FKK is not the best place to enjoy good quality champagne. Even among Moet champagne, different quality sent to different places. Fortunately for clubs, Turkish give business to clubs buying bottles to drink whole night, less business for girls with them.

[FuckedUpSwede]

Thanks Tintin, Poly and Pistons, always nice to know someone like your reviews.

I do often see champagne bottles in the bars of FKK: s but this is the first time someone actually has tried to sell it to me. I like champagne but I would never pay ridiculous price for it. I am a simple worker with basic taste and average wage.

I normally park my "car" at a side street, and not at the FKK parking, because I do not think they would let me pass the gate if I park it beside the Porsches and Mercedes!

[Pistons]

Salaam, FUSwede. I totally agree. This report reminds me of FKK Palast in Freiburg. The drinks thing is a disaster, one of the things that brought strip clubs into disfavor in the first place. FKKs were supposed to be a fresh start.

It is hard to have a natural-feeling conversation with a girl if she is bugging you for drinks every few minutes. It doesn't sound like her talking but a pimp-puppet. Another point is that turning WGs into sales girls infringes on their independence. The true freelancers would prefer to concentrate on their real trade -- sex -- so they will tend to drift away from such a phony scene.

Salami Polyamorist! Very very true! Overheard a girl today when talking with two Italian guys. One was clearly a bit drunk and did lots of these italic gestures while speaking. I didn't catch all he said, but he used his whole body when speaking. The girl just replied once through all his ramblings: "I just want to fuck" Then they laughed.

[Polyamorist]

Pretty nice setup but what destroys the place, in my opinion, is the mood. There are two beers included in the price, drink more and pay 5 Eur for a 33 CL beer or 15 euro for a 4 CL Gin Tonic. They also have the fantastic opportunity to buy a drink for the girls and the entrance women was happy to declare that "the girls only drink Champagne so do not bother to offer them something simpler". The "champagne" of course started from 40 Eur "Piccolo" size up to absurdum.

The girls also tried to sell me this bullshit and it killed my mood! I told her I'd prefer to fuck her for that money.

It is clearly aimed at getting businessmen drunk and losing their head. I hate that shit, keep it to the strip clubs please.

Salaam, FUSwede. I totally agree. This report reminds me of FKK Palast in Freiburg. The drinks thing is a disaster, one of the things that brought strip clubs into disfavor in the first place. FKKs were supposed to be a fresh start.

It is hard to have a natural-feeling conversation with a girl if she is bugging you for drinks every few minutes. It doesn't sound like her talking but a pimp-puppet. Another point is that turning WGs into sales girls infringes on their independence. The true freelancers would prefer to concentrate on their real trade -- sex -- so they will tend to drift away from such a phony scene.

[Tintin1]

When I was about to leave they checked my consumption at the bar and seemed disapponted that I just had my two beers.

Read all your reports, thank you so much. Planning my trip for the winter and plan to do 8 days across the country. I will head back to Augsburg. No upselling, no drink selling.

Girls are nude and while the prices are usually higher than wahat you experienced the girls can not approach you. You have to go talk to the ladies. Otherwise they just lie around and.

Make you horny staring at so many naked decent ladies.

Again, thank you so much for so much pain (the other reviews), but consider you've helped so many people. ;-0.

[FuckedUpSwede]

Visited this place today for 6 hours, then I could not stand it anymore.

The building looks like it would fit The Addams Family and I do think I stumbled upon parts of the family as well.

At least I'm sure I fucked Morticia and it must have been Fester and Lurch I saw lurking around in the corridors. I cannot recollect seeing Gomez but maybe I was his stand in today?

The building consists of 3 floors (probably also a cellar you do not want to visit). Top floor = fuck rooms with mirrors (nice! Second floor with bar, porn cinema and "livingroom".

Bottom floor with changing rooms, sauna and eating. There is also a quite nice garden with a biosauna and a pool.

Entrance is 60 Eur, 30 min fuck / suck is 50 euro and extras is 25 Eur.

Pretty nice setup but what destroys the place, in my opinion, is the mood. There are two beers included in the price, drink more and pay 5 Eur for a 33 CL beer or 15 euro for a 4 CL Gin Tonic. They also have the fantastic opportunity to buy a drink for the girls and the entrance women was happy to declare that "the girls only drink Champagne so do not bother to offer them something simpler". The "champagne" of course started from 40 Eur "Piccolo" size up to absurdum.

The girls also tried to sell me this bullshit and it killed my mood! I told her I'd prefer to fuck her for that money.

It is clearly aimed at getting businessmen drunk and losing their head. I hate that shit, keep it to the strip clubs please.

Well well, I found me a nice Polish girl and also a Romanian to session. No shame on them, they are just doing what they are told from management.

When I was about to leave they checked my consumption at the bar and seemed disapponted that I just had my two beers.

[McAdonis]

Now I read that it was the extension that completely burnt down but that might have been where all of the action was, the main building is still standing.

This is tragic news. Your post compelled me to read the Dutch forums. Apparently the customer who died was a well known regular. Everybody only had nice things to say about him. A few had spoken to him the night he died. He had been in a good mood, happy that he was going to be a grandfather again. Reportedly his family had known about his sauna club activities.

[FuckedUpSwede]

Tried this little gem yesterday.

This is a small FKK (the girls are nude) and I supose it mainly attracts local mongers.

Situated* in a industrial area that also contains residential buildings and consists of 3 floors.

First with bar, dressing room and small cold buffet (quite good, varity of cheese, salads, cold pasta, etc.).

Second with porn kino (a lot of action take place here).

Top floor with sauna.

I went there a Sunday and that means 35 euro entry. This was well worth. The place is a bit worn down but I like that, it makes me feel like home. I'm not into gold and marble.

And now to the girls, the really good part of this club. A lot of you would not call them stunners but I loved them! Had two really good sessions with one girl from Romania and one girl from Croatia. There was 7 girls in the premises when I arrived and 5 mongers. The mood was good and the girls seemed to enjoy. The girls I talked to originated from Germany, Croatia, Romania and Bulgaria. It seems to me the smaller clubs has a better variety of girls and the girls are much more natural (lesser tatoos, no silicone, some woman fat on ass, etc.).

GFE is almost guaranteed and upselling is low.

A standard session is 60 euro /30 min and extras is 20 euro.

Best club on my trip this far!

[Downandup]

Now I read that it was the extension that completely burnt down but that might have been where all of the action was, the main building is still standing.

[Downandup]

Sadly a customer has died at Gallardo in the early hours of this morning. The club has been completely destroyed and 3 men arrested for stopping the firefighters by grabbing the hoses for a water fight.

https://www.presseportal.de/blaulich.../65858/4322551
https://www.tag24.de/nachrichten/hamminkeln-maenner-nehmen-feuerwehr-die-schlaeuche-weg-mann-stirbt-bei-brand-in-saunaclub-1134282?fbclid=IwAR18Pl5J8Y-UHplz12JpXqD9eHiQ8ij2AXnNPtrWO1sq6Mup18ZzwLXDdfs

[FuckedUpSwede]

Ok, new day new remote club.

I would first like to quote William Blake "The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom. " That is the leading star in my strive for enlightment on this trip. I want to get to the FKK core. Find out exactly what this is about.

Today I think I took another step on that path.

I could find only one 4 year old german review for this club and the leading phrase in that review was "Friedhofsatmosphre" I think the right translation would be "graveyard atmosphere".

I think there is nothing wrong with this club, it is an excellent club. I was greeted by, what I assume, was the owner after buzzing the door. A polite, good english speaking, gentleman. He showed me the premises that consist of a good finnish sauna, a main lounge with a projector showing decent porn (mirrored of some peculiar reason), a outdoor part with some sun chairs, a massage room, a gym, billiard table, a bar with some cold snacks, a couple of nice fuck rooms and a jacuzzi. Everything clean and in good order. A setup that would make a lot of other clubowners jealous.

The problem is not the club. The problem is the mongers. Or to be more precise, the lack of mongers.

When I arrived at 7 pm there was 1 monger and 1 girl. So monger / girl ratio = 2 = sausage fest.

I took a sauna and the manager showed up and threw some menthol things on the oven. This gave a interesting sensation. Like showering in mouthwash.

When I returned the other monger had done his deed and left so the only ones left was me, Claudia 35 from Greece and the manager who retreated to his office.

The good side = unlimited coach time with a fun girl.

The bad side = boring to be alone when the conversation dies.

A good title for a novel "the lone monger". I mean "the lone warrior" and "the lone ranger" are already taken. Or would it be better suited for a horror movie? You decide.

Prices was 50 euro entrance
30 min fuck/suck 50 euro.