Filipinas - Opinions and Advice

[Rampana]

It's also important to remember that Filipinas, and Asians in general, don't necessarily define love using the same hyperbolic, romanticized criteria (heavily influenced by Hollywood) used typically by Westerners.

GE

Hello, GE,

I strongly have to disagree this. In my experience with pinay THEY ARE very influenced by Hollywood clichés when it comes to love matters. They think in a very romantic and idealistic way about love as a feeling and NOT love as an action of mutual give and take.

Atleast with the women I met.

Remember all of these Pinoy mellow romantic heart-breaking love songs which are on the lips of these girl day-in and day-out.

Just my humble opinion.

Ram

[Chocha Monger]

I tried to apply most of what Chocha Monger suggested with a Filipina girlfriend I had. She seemed to pass all the tests at first. I met her while she was working in Korea. When I told her that I had a trip to the Philippines planned, she encouraged me to go and have fun with lots of women. I thought I had found the best gf possible. It was several months later when she started revealing who she truly was. She complained many times about her family always wanting more money than she was sending. Then she started getting jealous about every woman that I had ever been involved with, and even the ones that were walking down the street. She even got jealous when I would spend time with my kids.

But this is not unique to Filipinas. I was married to a Korean for about 20 years, before I realized all the things about her that led to our divorce.

Bottom line is you take your chances with any woman, regardless of her nationality. I think GE's suggestion is best. Just go to the Philippines and enjoy yourself.

True there are no hard and fast rules for flushing out a crazy ho regardless of nationality. My recommendations are only meant to be guidelines to help eager wife hunters hold themselves in check. I've dealt with hoes of all kinds. Some reveal their true selves in 5 minutes or less. The really dangerous ones can wait you out for 5 years, maybe more. Lots of patience and time are the only sure things that can unmask a woman's true motives. Think of courtship as two opposing snipers concealed on the battlefield. The first one to move and give away his position is usually the one who dies.

[FreebieFan]

Towelboy,

Jealous and controlling is a problem. Don't let her see you off at the airport. If she can't trust you then you can't trust her.

Well said Sir. Jealousy is all consuming disease but many Filipinas have it. If you don't answer a text within nano seconds of its delivery, some will assume you are fooling around. If they ask you " what are you doing " in a text, the subtext is " are you fucking my neighbours daughter " Find a girl who doesn't ask such questions and you will be saving yourself a lot of grief later.

If she talks to you in a suspicious way, asks why you are looking at an attractive girl, if she "accidently" checks the pockets of your clothes or wants to check your phone and the messages or your email, RUN FAR AND FAST!

[Hairy Wonder]

I tried to apply most of what Chocha Monger suggested with a Filipina girlfriend I had. She seemed to pass all the tests at first. I met her while she was working in Korea. When I told her that I had a trip to the Philippines planned, she encouraged me to go and have fun with lots of women. I thought I had found the best gf possible. It was several months later when she started revealing who she truly was. She complained many times about her family always wanting more money than she was sending. Then she started getting jealous about every woman that I had ever been involved with, and even the ones that were walking down the street. She even got jealous when I would spend time with my kids.

But this is not unique to Filipinas. I was married to a Korean for about 20 years, before I realized all the things about her that led to our divorce.

Bottom line is you take your chances with any woman, regardless of her nationality. I think GE's suggestion is best. Just go to the Philippines and enjoy yourself.

[GoodEnough]

The last couple of posts seem to suggest that there's some sort of universal litmus test for forming relationships here or perhaps in third world countries. I don't agree. I suggest forgetting the checklists, the completion of which only detract from the joy of meeting people. My advice is much simpler: relax and let things happen. Don't invent "tests" of woman's motivation and above all, don't worry about it. If a given woman interests you, then keep seeing her, and over time, you'll begin to understand her character.

It's also important to remember that Filipinas, and Asians in general, don't necessarily define love using the same hyperbolic, romanticized criteria (heavily influenced by Hollywood) used typically by Westerners. Many Asian ladies can be much more pragmatic than their American / European sisters, and the financial ability to provide a decent life is important to them and is often one of the criteria they use in thinking about a longer-term relationship.

Finally, I would cease worrying about age difference. No one here cares, though it might be an isolating condition in the judgmental atmosphere of the States. Come over. Enjoy yourself. And if you meet people in whom you may be truly interested in the longer term, allow some time for the relationship to develop. Remember too that many middle class Filipinas are as wary of Westerners as some of us are of them. We worry that they may be interested only in our money and they worry that we may only be interested in getting into their pants and then moving on to the next conquest. There's a confidence-building learning curve on both sides of the ro, ance equation.

GE

[X Man]

Excellent advice.

Towelboy,

Like Red Kilt said you'll have to draw upon your past experiences and see what you can learn from the previous crime scenes. Take a long hard look at yourself and ask where you fucked up. Sometimes we don't really listen to what women are saying before we get involved with them. Maybe we listen superficially instead of reading between the lines and catching the red flags. Ironically, I developed this skill from interviewing potential employees and then started applying it in the game. Be prepared to start with a large group and eliminate those who do not meet your criteria. Feel free to be ruthless, it's your life and your money at risk. Do not let them know you're seeking a wife. It is the fastest way to fuck yourself. You may as well just get out and scream free visa to USA on the streets. They'll put on an act for you.

Find a girl who does things for you without being asked. Does she bring you food? Does she take your clothes home and wash it? If a Filipina gives a fuck about pleasing you it isn't that hard to find out. Get rid of any girl asking for money or hinting at it through hardluck stories. When you go out with her see if she looks out for your money. Does she steer you away from expensive (by local standards) items to more economical ones? Does she negotiate prices down for you on cabs and trikes? A Filipina worth a fuck would make sure that you're not being taken advantage of as a foreigner. Find a girl that is not too close or depends a lot on her family. It will save you trouble later. Always make it clear that you'll not be financially supporting their family from the start. Curb their expectations. I think you've already got that part down since you're looking for one with no kids. Dig into her past and then dig some more. A private investigator is money well spent for any marriage minded man. It's best to have an unbiased source of information apart from references from her family and friends. Don't give her money. Don't buy her gifts. Keep dining experiences simple and to a minimum. In other words try to eliminate things that may be incentives for her to stick around even if she secretly doesn't care much for you. Take some time for yourself and see how she reacts. Jealous and controlling is a problem. Don't let her see you off at the airport. If she can't trust you then you can't trust her.

[Chocha Monger]

Towelboy,

Like Red Kilt said you'll have to draw upon your past experiences and see what you can learn from the previous crime scenes. Take a long hard look at yourself and ask where you fucked up. Sometimes we don't really listen to what women are saying before we get involved with them. Maybe we listen superficially instead of reading between the lines and catching the red flags. Ironically, I developed this skill from interviewing potential employees and then started applying it in the game. Be prepared to start with a large group and eliminate those who do not meet your criteria. Feel free to be ruthless, it's your life and your money at risk. Do not let them know you're seeking a wife. It is the fastest way to fuck yourself. You may as well just get out and scream free visa to USA on the streets. They'll put on an act for you.

Find a girl who does things for you without being asked. Does she bring you food? Does she take your clothes home and wash it? If a Filipina gives a fuck about pleasing you it isn't that hard to find out. Get rid of any girl asking for money or hinting at it through hardluck stories. When you go out with her see if she looks out for your money. Does she steer you away from expensive (by local standards) items to more economical ones? Does she negotiate prices down for you on cabs and trikes? A Filipina worth a fuck would make sure that you're not being taken advantage of as a foreigner. Find a girl that is not too close or depends a lot on her family. It will save you trouble later. Always make it clear that you'll not be financially supporting their family from the start. Curb their expectations. I think you've already got that part down since you're looking for one with no kids. Dig into her past and then dig some more. A private investigator is money well spent for any marriage minded man. It's best to have an unbiased source of information apart from references from her family and friends. Don't give her money. Don't buy her gifts. Keep dining experiences simple and to a minimum. In other words try to eliminate things that may be incentives for her to stick around even if she secretly doesn't care much for you. Take some time for yourself and see how she reacts. Jealous and controlling is a problem. Don't let her see you off at the airport. If she can't trust you then you can't trust her.

[Red Kilt]

<SNIP

Greg London (thank you) has introduced me to a "female friend" who is 26 and seems to be exactly what I am looking for. Tho I am mostly concerned by the 30 year age difference.

I have learned from experience that you can never really know someone until you are FACE-to-FACE so despite that this girl seems perfect, I plan to meet several woman on my proposed trip there in March or April. She knows that already and is agreeable to it.

If anyone else wishes to assist me in my search, I value your advice.

If you know a woman who is looking for the same things I am and would be an honest and faithful wife, I would be happy to correspond with her.

Most important, I will treat anyone I meet with honesty and integrity.

Thanks in Advance, Bob

Wow you sure have compiled a comprehensive shopping list Bob.

But you really must draw on all of the previous bad experiences that you have had. I am absolutely in agreement with you that you MUST meet any potential partner FACE TO FACE before you make ANY judgements about her suitability. (CAPS are deliberate. For emphasis).

Very few women (especially pinays) are perfect. You just need to evaluate the pros and cons of each and then decide whether you can live with the cons, that is, are they manageable?

You have made a good start. I hope some guys will come to your assistance. I will PM you later when I confirm a prospect for you.

[Towelboy2010]

Hello. As I have been reading the forum lately, it seems that perhaps I should contact a few expats there in search of an honest Filipina for marriage and family. I am looking, very seriously – to find my soul-mate and start a small 1 child family.

I was burnt once by a Filipina (welcome aboard) and am therefore seeking advice from older and / or wiser individuals.

About me

• Age 55.

• Live in PA, USA.

• College degree in teaching, but do not teach.

• Work 2 jobs. Manage the maintenance shop on a PA airport & acting Sales Rep for a Home Improvements company.

• Very middle class, but with very little disposable income in the current economic crisis.

• Own home w / mortgage. 2300 sq ft on 2 acres.

• Fly a plane and do safety videos for the FAA and others. (no income. Strictly volunteer work)

• Married once to an American in 1984. Divorced 1990.

• Married to a Filipina 2009, but it was a bigamous marriage (her) and the annulment is underway.

• I NEVER had any children.

• I am fairly easy going; not demanding; decent looking & intelligent. I am open and honest to my dates.

I first visited SEA in 2003 with a buddy. I started "dating" in the Phils in late 2005. I had 4 online relationships leading to meetings.

1. Dolly. Dec 2005 meeting. No future.

2. Michelle. March 2007 meeting. Applied for visa but she changed her mind.

3. Julie. October 2007 meeting. No future.

4. Gazelle. March 2008 meeting; Jan 25, 2009 wedding in USA. July 2009 annulment proceedings started.

WHO I AM LOOKING FOR:

• No children.

• Believes in and practices Love as written in 1st Corinthians.

• Understands and accepts that marriage is a lifetime commitment.

• Educated & willing to work and have a career.

• Willing to help with housework & lawn care.

• Simple beauty (to my eye). No stunners as defined in this forum.

• Must be truthful to a fault. No liars, bull-shitters or story tellers.

• Here is a list of important personality traits in order of importance.

A. Cheerful.

B. Fun loving.

C. Clean & Organized.

D. Intelligent & Smart.

E. Hardworking.

F. Open, Honest & Truthful.

G. Communicative & Good Listener

H. Partially Independent.

I. Dependable.

J. Good Lover.

Greg London (thank you) has introduced me to a "female friend" who is 26 and seems to be exactly what I am looking for. Tho I am mostly concerned by the 30 year age difference. The 4 mentioned above were all mid to late 30's. I have learned from experience that you can never really know someone until you are FACE-to-FACE so despite that this girl seems perfect, I plan to meet several woman on my proposed trip there in March or April. She knows that already and is agreeable to it.

If anyone else wishes to assist me in my search, I value your advice.

If you know a woman who is looking for the same things I am and would be an honest and faithful wife, I would be happy to correspond with her.

Most important, I will treat anyone I meet with honesty and integrity.

Thanks in Advance, Bob

[Rampana]

That's too bad, Ram. I hope some of that weight went to her boobs! .

No, I am sorry. Upper legs only (Oberschenkel).

[Fast Buck Artist]

I said, of course, but then incidentally asked her if she had any money left over in the P 85, 000 peso account I had set up for a couple of months back. *snip* I dug out the mother's number and arranged to send her some cash directly. For this, she was extremely grateful and thanked me profusely, but also enquired as to what my Christmas gift for her is!

You got to be trolling us.

[Member #4491]

Uzbekia, I feel for you. It is easy to tell you to pull your head out of your ass, but we are where we are in life. A mans need to feel like being a provider can be strong and lead him to many compromises. In my humble opinion feeding your ego this way is not a path to anything but disappointments, but that is just me. One could go on about how you teach these leachers that moral criminality pays, but then again they are just a result of their nature and nurture. In the end we are all both buyers and sellers. They sold and you bought. Good value is in the eye of the beholder. I would not accept this family to lick the dog shit from my shoes, and I mean no disrespect to your choice of girlfriend whatsoever. Your last sentence indicates that you know exactly what you are doing, so have fun.

My new year promise was more a realization. I need to minimize the amount of negative "energy fields" around me. Now this might sound that I spiced my brownies a bit to hard, but exactly the type of people and bars Uzbekia experienced is what I refer to. The options in the Philippines are virtually endless so I see no point in valuing yourself low. Be true to yourself, control chemical addictions so you can get the most bang or the buck once you decide to indulge, forgive your ego without nursing it and choose who you spend time with.

F*ck mates, I waisted half my life going for less than I could, and the last months I realized that also the tens or the twelves are just as hungry for attention, care, love and survival. All over the world. Mongering is a hobby but doing it with self respect is a philosophy. Thank you all philosophers here on ISG for not discriminating yourselves and sharing so amply.

All the best and my wishes for a great and juicy 2011!

Barba

[Uzbekia]

I lost my "Meet the Pinoy Parents" virginity a few months ago. . . It was not an altogether different experience from that described by Sammon below.

GF and I managed to slip into Zambo without being deluged by the relatives at the airport, but they. And all the friends and the neighbors. Showed up at the hotel unannounced and en masse the following morning. We all then went out for lunch (I paid) , during which I was asked all manner of peculiar questions. Of course, I didn't mind paying (and would have done so regardless) , but I couldn't help but notice afterwards that no one offered a word of thanks for doing so. Not a big deal, but a cultural clash to be sure and, in a slightly sleep-deprived state, it grated a tad.

Anyway, after lunch, a jeepney was procured to transport myself and the clan back to the home village (I paid) so that I could meet the remaining members of the clan who had not made the trek out to Zambo (read: the men). I am certainly no stranger to impoverished rural settlements, but the tiny dimensions of my GF's family's housing was eye-opening. After a bit of conversation, I was shown the family photo album. As it demonstrated, the family had fallen into poverty after my GF's ex-husband passed away. All quite sad, really.

After the village visit, the clan and I returned to the city to meet the GF's siblings. In attempting to pay the jeepney driver for his services, one of the clansters outside of my GF's family (who incidentally was the only one who spoke near perfect English) attempted to scam me out of about P500 (to her credit, my GF alerted me) , which again grated a tad. The visit to the sibling's abode was another invaluable education in the Filipino accommodations, but overall was very pleasant. I was even treated to my first Red Horse, which henceforth started what I think may become a lifelong addiction.

In the following days, the extended clan seemed to lose interest in me, which afforded me the opportunity to get to know my GF's mother a bit better. All in all, it was nice, even if I never once heard a word of thanks for buying the meals or assorted other amenities!

A bit of weirdness on the last day: my GF's mother never stopped by the hotel and had her phone switched off, so we both left without saying goodbye. It made me wonder what was really going on with the mother. Daughter dynamics, which have only grown more peculiar since.

A few days ago, my GF informed me that the infant child of one of her siblings had been diagnosed with a very serious illness and asked me if I could assist. I said, of course, but then incidentally asked her if she had any money left over in the P 85, 000 peso account I had set up for a couple of months back. She said there was nne left and then when I ventured to gently inquire as to what use it had been directed, she flew into a bit of an inconsolable state and said she was not going to accept my help after all and was going back to "work". . . A few hours later (after my GF had stormed off without accepting even taxi money) , I dug out the mother's number and arranged to send her some cash directly. For this, she was extremely grateful and thanked me profusely, but also enquired as to what my Christmas gift for her is!

This. And a steady stream of heart-breaking incidents involving said GF. Have led me to conclude that the world of Filipino "bars" is where sadists may dabble, but only true masochists dwell.

I have visited girls home couple of times. One was near Baybay, Leyte. I was dating this 19 year old girl who I met online. Flew her many times to Manila and stayed with her a week at a time. Very pretty GFE. Anyway she kept on asking me to visit her house, even her mom asked me to come whenever she was on the phone. On a whim I decided to go there mainly because wanted to see the local area. Flew to Tacloban with her. We were met by atleast 8 people her father, mother, sister, aunt and some cousins. They rented a big van (I paid). Right out of the airport they all decided that they are hungry and stopped at a roadside barbecue place (I paid). From tacloban to baybay it took approx 2 hours. By looking at her people I knew they were very poor and decided to stay in Baybay hotel mainly in order not to put them in trouble treating me. Initial plan was to stay at her place for a week. They dropped me at the hotel and the girl went home woith her folks promising to come ack in a couple of hours. She did come back in a borrowed moped and kept that moped to take me around everywhere. She was attending school (I supported) Leyte state college.

Next day she said her parents has invited us for dinner and she wanted buy things for dinner (I paid). In the evening she came and picked me up drove about 45 minutes to her place. A tiny house with 2 rooms and a kitchen and a bath / toilet with a hole. I had brought 2 bottles of duty free whisky and I gave to her parents. All the neighbours were curios to see me and I would say close to 50 people came to see me. All smiled and some talked little. The girl had her own room, she said so we went in there and fooled around little it because she wanted in her own bed. Suddenly dinner was ready and only two plates were there one for me and the other for the girl. They served pork and rice only. It was delicious but I dare not help myself to a big portion because I felt there was not enough food for all. The girl finished her dinner fast and the same plate was washed and her father was served in that. I figured by this time they had only two decent plates. So I finished fast. At that time her uncle and aunt came who has a farm nearby. They were served in the same plates. Uncle tried to convince me to invest in his farm by buying farm machinery and he said can make good money in business. I showed interest just to be polite. Pretty soon I was tired of the whole thing and told the family I need to go. The father wanted to take me fishing next day. I said I will let him know. Back in the room I told the girl I wanted go stay in Ormoc because the hotel I was staying is not good. We had a good time in Ormoc.

The whole experience put me off so much that whenever the girls ask me to visit their place I would decline.

I need some basic restroom facilities and running water in order to stay. I was also afraid of catching something and getting sick. But the people are extremely friendly.

So I would say if you want to visit a girl's place it is ok as long as you stay in a hotel. Also be aware that you need to pay for everything even if they host the dinner.

[Rampana]

Enjoy while you can cause a filipina taken to USA will typically Double her weight in 4 years and you will not enjoy seeing her in a bikini anymore! ;)

Taken to Germany she will double her weight withing 4 WEEKS already. Especial watch the upper legs.

My experience twice. .

Ram

[Rampana]

Enjoy while you can cause a filipina taken to USA will typically Double her weight in 4 years and you will not enjoy seeing her in a bikini anymore! ;)

Taken to Germany she will double her weight withing 4 WEEKS already. Especial watch the upper legs.

My experience twice.

Ram