Rookie Advice and Opinions

[Mandrake]

That advice won't work so well in some parts of the world. In Australia, for example, the price quoted will be a flat rate for a pre-determined service (with additional services usually costing extra). Try and 'negotiate' with the average Aussie hooker and you'll end up getting a crap service, or get turned down completely, because it will be considered insulting.
Also, in Australia and a number of other countries

Hi folks.

This is just an addition to RNs comments on paying up front.
In most of Western Europe the price is fixed and payment is expected upfront.

As always, the 'when in Rome' rule apply and it is always a good idear to check out the customs of the country you visit.

As for picking girls.
This is tricky, personally I have accepted the fact that even with the all the preparation in the world, sometimes it will be crap anyway.
Just accept that and move on.

Thanks, m

[Rubber Nursey]

Van Velen,

Like EA, I wasn't entirely sure whether you were talking about sex workers or 'regular' girls. If you're talking about propositioning a woman who is obviously working (at a disco, go-go, street corner, whatever), just go for it. Hookers are businesswomen and they will be expecting you to talk business at some point. If you're not sure whether she's working or not, but you think she is, the suggestions EA gave you are great. Do some polite fishing and wait for her to make the suggestion. However, in places where prostitution is illegal (or girls have reason to be scared of the cops) she may need you to be the one to ask outright and if there's a language barrier, you may have difficulty picking up on any subtle hints she's trying to make.

If you're talking about offering a 'regular' girl money for sex ...don't do it!!! Most women would be horrified by the insinuation that they are a wh*re. Honestly, even when I was a wh*re, I was insulted by people who thought they could buy my affections outside of working hours. (Hookers have private sex lives, too!) Anyway, why would you want to pay a regular girl for sex? If the conversation is getting cosy enough for you to bring up the subject of having sex, then there's a good chance that she wants it too - for free!

[Rubber Nursey]

As always, an excellent post by El Austriaco. Particularly (from a sex worker's point of view) the part about clarifying exactly what's included in the service, before the service starts. It makes the session flow much easier when you both know what you want and what's expected of you. I would also add condom use to EA's list of things to agree on prior to the service. If you go in expecting a BBBJ, you won't be impressed when she slips on a condom - I've also read stories from guys who automatically assumed they would use a condom for sex and were horrified to have the girl just jump on without one! If there's something really important to you that she won't agree on, PLEASE don't go into it thinking that you'll be able to change her mind during the session. Save her the aggravation and yourself the disappointment and go find another girl who offers the specific service you're looking for.

And just on the last two points EA made...

7) Don't take the first offer they make. You gotta negotiate, man. Doing your research here and collecting the latest intel in the field will give you a good idea of what to pay.
8) And, most importantly, NEVER pay upfront. NEVER.

That advice won't work so well in some parts of the world. In Australia, for example, the price quoted will be a flat rate for a pre-determined service (with additional services usually costing extra). Try and 'negotiate' with the average Aussie hooker and you'll end up getting a crap service, or get turned down completely, because it will be considered insulting. Please remember that unless the girl is independent, the amount quoted will usually include an agency fee. Any discounts given will almost always come off the girl's share of the fee, which isn't fair considering it's the girl that's performing the service. Haggling the fee down to where she's barely getting anything out of it (and you may not even know this is the case, particularly if you do the deal with the agency, not the girl herself) is a sure-fire way to get yourself a terrible service from a pissed off sex worker who thinks you're a cheapskate.

Also, in Australia and a number of other countries, it's standard practice to pay upfront. No money upfront, no service. Here, most clients wouldn't even contemplate asking to pay afterwards - it's just how it's done. Obviously this issue is all about trust. You guys don't trust we'll do the service once you've paid and we don't trust that you'll pay us afterwards. I won't bother saying which option I believe is 'right' (that should be obvious!) but I will say this...if your girl spends the entire booking wondering whether you're gonna pay her at the end or whether she's having sex with a complete stranger for absolutely nothing, she's not gonna be nearly as attentive as she would be if her wallet was already full.

[El Austriaco]

Always glad to be of help. I just remembered something that might be of interest to you, about that very hard-to-define category between pros and non-pros, the so-called semipros. In other words, a non-pro who, considering the right circumstances, might want to consider a (direct or rather indirect)sex for money transaction. A while ago, we had an interesting exchange with a guy on the Cartagena, Colombia board on this. This was his original story:

http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...postcount=1622

And a few guys chimed in on this, including myself:

http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...postcount=1623
http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...postcount=1625
http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...postcount=1626

I thought it might be interesting to you.

EA

[Van Velen]

Thanks a lot for the info, El Austriaco. I'm sure I'm not the only one who profitted from it.

[George90]

I agree with Alex. My own experience: in my late teens /early twenties, I will screw any woman with a single priority: to cum asap and as many times as possible. Then I start getting bothered when the session with the professional or the girlfriend was not interactive: the 'usual' behavior where a woman spreads her legs open and things that's the only thing she needs to do. I and my late twenties, I would be so turned off by such women but I will not even have an erection to. Loose!

In my 30s, I lost completely my patience for women (again girlfriends or professionals) who will not do this or that. Even the few times I ended up continuing the sex act to full orgasm, it was a miserable one. I couldn't understand why I had to 'beg; for a blow job or why a girlfriend will never come on top etc. I also found it very irritating when a pro will not take of her bra.

In my 40s now, I am having hard time to turned on by anyone who does not have a pleasant personality and/or a smile on her face.

Again, that's my personal experience. Again, I think more of it is psychological, feeling that the person next to you.pro or not- really cares about you even for 5 minutes, than having to battle an orgasm out of a situation.

I had the same evolution. When I was younger, I could put up with the BS many women give us much more than I can now. Now, if she doesn't have the body shape I like, a pleasant personality, and a willingness to do what I want, then I don't have the time or money for her.

In fact, I am much more willing to go with a plain looking woman with a nice personality than a gorgeous woman who has a horrible personality.

[George90]

Gentlemen,

A question that I have been pondering, in light of my plans to visit a good
mongering country this summer, is how to approach a girl. What to say to her to let her know what my intention is. I don't think I would feel comfortable just stepping up to her, tap her on the shoulder, and make my proposition, though. I will at least try to have a "normal" conversation with her first, which shouldn't be so difficult since we will propably be somewhat of the same age. But then the tricky part. When and how do I let her know that I'm not "just" a tourist but someone who wouldn't mind taking a 'tour' in her pants, in exchange for a appropriate fee of course. Since at the moment I am still unsure I thought it wise to ask the more experienced here what they have used in situations in which it actually worked. And of course what didn't work. Please keep in mind that there will be some kind of language barrier. My English is damn near flawless (ahum!) depsite not being a native speaker but I'm afraid I can't expect the same of them. As always, any input will be appreciated.

I was also wondering whether you are referring to mongering or non-pro action.

Your post gives the impression that you are interested in non-pro action. I suck at picking up non-pros so I can't help you there.

If you mean P4P, then El A has given you good advice.

[El Austriaco]

Gentlemen,

A question that I have been pondering, in light of my plans to visit a good
mongering country this summer, is how to approach a girl. What to say to her to let her know what my intention is. I don't think I would feel comfortable just stepping up to her, tap her on the shoulder, and make my proposition, though. I will at least try to have a "normal" conversation with her first, which shouldn't be so difficult since we will propably be somewhat of the same age. But then the tricky part. When and how do I let her know that I'm not "just" a tourist but someone who wouldn't mind taking a 'tour' in her pants, in exchange for a appropriate fee of course. Since at the moment I am still unsure I thought it wise to ask the more experienced here what they have used in situations in which it actually worked. And of course what didn't work. Please keep in mind that there will be some kind of language barrier. My English is damn near flawless (ahum!) depsite not being a native speaker but I'm afraid I can't expect the same of them. As always, any input will be appreciated.

Short of some more specific information, it is sort of hard to give you specific advice, but I will try anyhow.

1) When you say "mongering", let me first make sure we are talking about the same thing, right? P4P... pay for play, sex for money. In other words, prostitution. Well, if so, don't worry: since we are talking about a business transaction, the girl will know what you want. Everything I am going to say pertains to girls offering sex for money (pros), NOT to regular girls (non-pros). I'll address regular girls separately.

2) You don't mention which country you are thinking about visiting. Personally, I can only talk about the countries I have mongered in, which include some of the most notorious destinations (Cuba, Dominican Republic, Brazil, Colombia, Thailand, Mexico, El Salvador, Venezuela, among others), and for example, I have never been to the Philippines (PI), which also seems to be a very popular mongering destination. Wherever you go, I'd say stick to the places you read about here on ISG as hangouts for hookers, and you can be sure that no one in those places will be offended if you drop the money question. No reason to be shy about it. Just be polite, gracious and with a sense of humor about it, if necessary, and you will be fine.

I remember one time in Puerto la Cruz, Venezuela, in 2001, I had an hour-long conversation with a very nice girl I wasn't really sure about whether she was hooking or not. Finally, a friend of hers came up to me and said, "Well, unless you have something else planned today, there is an option". I said, "OK, what's that?" She said "A night of pleasure". I said, "You know, sounds fine, I like the concept of pleasure, but something tells me you are not talking about it in the biblical sense of the word. The thing is, here in Venezuela, pleasure works more like an amusement park, so the question really is... how much is the admission fee?" And we took it from there...

If nothing else, you could always say that you really like her and want to "spend time with her in private, to get to know her better". Ask her if she knows a good place to go. If she really is a hooker, she will have no problem suggesting a nearby (love) motel. If that's what she suggests, you know what is up, and can offer her a "present". Ask her to suggest the size of the "cash present". And you will know what you want to know.

3) Especially since you obviously speak good English despite not being a native speaker, I assume you will strike up conversations with the girls in English (I might be wrong, but you don't mention anything about foreign languages, or where you wanna go...). Don't worry: the working girls you will meet in most foreign countries and who are able to communicate in English are most certainly experienced veterans at the game and not offended by anyone inquiring about the details of the deal. I think it would be more of a problem if a girl didn't speak English (like most girls) and who you accidentally take for a hooker while she is not. Believe me, you go to a place where hookers hang out waiting for tourists AND the girl speaks English, she is hooker who has been in the game for a while, period. Veranda Help in Rio de Janeiro or La Dolce Vita in Cartagena, Colombia would be a good examples for this.

4) If for whatever reason, you are talking about "regular girls", i.e. no hookers, trying to offer them money, hm, this is a way more sensitive proposal, and I would greatly discourage you from that unless you know the local language and the culture very well. Depending on where you are, the worst-case scenario could be that you might seriously offend a girl and be in lots of trouble (like getting beaten up by her BF, family, or friends, or worse). If you are really unsure whether a girl is hooking or not, please err on the side of caution and DON'T offer anything; let her make the move. This especially applies to places that are not only frequented by hookers and their customers, but mostly be regular people, with a few (off-duty or not) hookers thrown into the mix, too. In this case, I think it is more prudent to wait for the girl to take the first step. Off the top of my head, Paco's in the pedestrian Zone in Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic, comes to mind. Again, reading ISG here will give you an inklining as to what kind of place a joint is. I am addressing this here since you wrote something to the effect of "and it actually worked", which makes me think that maybe, just maybe, you might not only be talking about hookers (my logic being "Why would he be worried that a hooker would turn him down? Perhaps he IS talking about regular girls").

5) General advice: make eye contact, smile, invite her over to your table, offer her a drink, start making small talk, and take it from there. Ultimately, how quickly you want to nail down the details of the transaction and/or how much time you want to spend with the girl outside of the bedroom before is really up to you. Some guys are of the "wham-bam, thank-you-Mam" variety, others like to party with the girls, others like to indulge into their fantasy of almost like having a GF (the so-called "girlfriend experience") and take them out to dinner, spend days on the beach with them, whatever not. Some like to spend their entire vacation with a single girl. It all depends on your style.

6) On a final note, please make sure to negotiate ALL details of your deal with a girl before hand: how much, which currency, how long (e.g. 1 hour, 2 hours, all night long?), how many pops (e.g. one, two, unlimited?), what is included (DFK, BBBJ, DATY, and so on and so forth). This will save you LOTS of trouble later. Whenever a girl tells you, "Just give me whatever you think is fair", don't do it. I am only speaking about the countries I have been to, of course. In some Asian countries, things might be different, I think. You might want to listen to the Asia experts on that (I do not consider myself to be one of them).

7) Don't take the first offer they make. You gotta negotiate, man. Doing your research here and collecting the latest intel in the field will give you a good idea of what to pay.

8) And, most importantly, NEVER pay upfront. NEVER.

Well, that's all I can think of right now. Hope this helps.

EA

[Van Velen]

Gentlemen,

A question that I have been pondering, in light of my plans to visit a good
mongering country this summer, is how to approach a girl. What to say to her to let her know what my intention is. I don't think I would feel comfortable just stepping up to her, tap her on the shoulder, and make my proposition, though. I will at least try to have a "normal" conversation with her first, which shouldn't be so difficult since we will propably be somewhat of the same age. But then the tricky part. When and how do I let her know that I'm not "just" a tourist but someone who wouldn't mind taking a 'tour' in her pants, in exchange for a appropriate fee of course. Since at the moment I am still unsure I thought it wise to ask the more experienced here what they have used in situations in which it actually worked. And of course what didn't work. Please keep in mind that there will be some kind of language barrier. My English is damn near flawless (ahum!) depsite not being a native speaker but I'm afraid I can't expect the same of them. As always, any input will be appreciated.

[Double Nickle]

Didn't think it was possible but after 2 weeks of twice daily ejaculations, it took me a good deal of time to cum and it was a mere drop.

I read somewhere that it's a combination of too much sex and not enough rest. I eat well and exercise regularly, so I'm covered there.

Any views on this?

I participated in a research project at a Urology medical practice. I had to regularly come in and provide a fresh semen sample. I was told, if I remember correctly, that after the 3rd day or so the semen start to die off. But after spilling all your seed it took about 2 days to build up a full supply. I presume the seminal fluid waxes and wanes with the semen. Anyway, a 2 to 3 day wait should maximise the volume and motility of semen. I'm not sure the latter is of any advantage unless you're looking to impregnate somebody.

I've read of a supplement that is supposed to increase sperm volume. I'll keep an eye out for it.

Double Nickle

[Sasha Coffee]

I don't think there is any magic number of times you need to visit a WG to get GFE. Its a personal thing between two people and it will happen when you are both comfortable.

I would you suggest you pick a WG who is maybe in her late 20s has worked for a while. I say this because they are generally aware that most guys want a certain amount of GFE they are also experienced enough to take their time and understand what you are trying to achieve. It could take you a while to find the right WG but it will be fun finding her.

Sometimes I find I can never provide a GFE to a client no matter how often he visits me, as much as I try I can feel in myself that I'm faking it. Other clients I am able to provide this straight away or maybe on their 2nd or 3rd visit. Its about the chemistry between us in the first place, sometimes you can achieve that with fimiliarity and sometimes not.

Be patient.

[The Greek]

I agree with Alex. My own experience: in my late teens /early twenties, I will screw any woman with a single priority: to cum asap and as many times as possible. Then I start getting bothered when the session with the professional or the girlfriend was not interactive: the 'usual' behavior where a woman spreads her legs open and things that's the only thing she needs to do. I and my late twenties, I would be so turned off by such women but I will not even have an erection to. Loose!

In my 30s, I lost completely my patience for women (again girlfriends or professionals) who will not do this or that. Even the few times I ended up continuing the sex act to full orgasm, it was a miserable one. I couldn't understand why I had to 'beg; for a blow job or why a girlfriend will never come on top etc. I also found it very irritating when a pro will not take of her bra.

In my 40s now, I am having hard time to turned on by anyone who does not have a pleasant personality and/or a smile on her face.

Again, that's my personal experience. Again, I think more of it is psychological, feeling that the person next to you.pro or not- really cares about you even for 5 minutes, than having to battle an orgasm out of a situation.

[Giggity]

Thanks, both of you, for your perspectives on the matter. I must say I had forgotten about having made that last post, so it was a nice surprise when I clicked back into this thread and saw two answers to it!

That being said, I really asked my question in the worst possible way... as if there was some kind of magic number of minutes before a client went from "shifty" to "trusted"! So, thanks for elaborating on the subject. It helps everyone to remember that yes, even working girls are real people with real feelings, and different customer behaviors will bring about different provider behaviors, creating a totally different experience altogether.

Just like when I used to work in retail... I used to go out of my way to help nice customers to a ridiculous extent.. even to the point where my managers would criticize me for spending too much time helping people, whereas I gave the meanies just barely good enough service to keep me out of trouble. Perhaps that's why I don't work in retail anymore .

[Alex Rock]

Giggity & qwerty, don't know how I clicked into this thread. Here are some comments from a monger's experience.

I learned a lot about mongering first hand only after I found out my gf was a wg. I also learned about my own responses in different circumstances too. I was messed up in my head and set out on a kind of frenzy to get to know working girls in all kinds of circumstances. After a variety of experiences, I believe if you get a good provider/client relationship, just like with a hairdresser or tailor, everybody wins.

Different girls have very different styles and they can act different if they're tired or fresh, stressed or relaxed and whether they know you or not. When I took girls home, most would be a little nervous at first - you can understand why - but after some time getting to know each other, chatting and becoming friendly and developing some trust, I found the quality of sex with most girls improved immensely, especially after they'd wake up next day and often after breakfast (or lunch). Some girls get into it and others just aren't interested and don't make you feel good or don't seem to enjoy it themselves. I prefer not to give those girls repeat business.

Because my preference is for slower more prolonged sex, I choose the girls that like "that style". Over time, some working girls have become friends and might stay over for a few days, some want sex that is more "bfe" from their perspective, rather than oriented to making the client happy i.e. more gentle and caring and they like to be held all night. Other girls like fast and hard sex and after it's over don't want to be touched while they sleep.

I find I have trouble getting or keeping a hard on with girls that want to rush or who want fast hard sex or girls who they think that all they have to do is open their legs and let you "do it". I can lose my erection too when the condom goes on. At first I thought I had ED or some kind of performance anxiety. Now I think those girls weren't touching my "buttons", I was a little nervous and felt rushed. I respond much better to girls who take their time and touch me or stroke me gently and make you relax. When you feel relaxed it's easier to get a nice hard on and keep it.

Some girls learn what you like and seem to enjoy making you feel good. Girls who know what they are doing will help you relax and make sure you get good erections. They get the most repeat business and everybody wins because the girls will be more relaxed with you and you will with them.

Some guys on these sites like to negotiate prices right down and won't pay till the girl wants to go- that's their way. I offer to pay up front, I find that paying a little more, being polite and respectful, smiling and giving a little tip or a gift will make girls much more relaxed and happier. Some give little gifts back and some even come and cook at my place from time to time. Seems like common sense!?

[Rubber Nursey]

Sorry, Giggity. I missed your post.

I wouldn't say (for me, personally) that there's an actual number of visits involved. It's more about trust and honesty and simple chemistry. Some people you hit it off with, the same as you do in real life - you just 'click'. Some people just give off really good 'vibes' and are easy to trust right from the start. Likewise, some people give off really bad vibes and no number of visits are ever gonna make you feel relaxed and safe with them.

Honesty is something that generally has to be proven over time (also as in real life) with little things like turning up when they say they're going to, calling to apologise if they're not going to make the appointment and, something I tend to really pay attention to, sticking to the same story. Obviously we don't always share our whole life stories in P4P scenarios - but in a 'regular' situation, we do tend to eventually share at least a small part of ourselves. A guy who tells me one week that he's single and childless, then the next week tells me his wife is ill and his son needs new shoes (generally to try and knock the price of my service down!) is certainly not going to gain my trust in a hurry.

Trust, for me, is mostly instinctual, but also guided by client behaviour. For example, I never provided an anal sex service and I made that very clear from the start, however, some regular clients would repeatedly attempt to 'accidentally' slide it into the wrong place or continually finger me in that general area, in the hope that I would eventually change my mind. There is no possible way I could ever relax and lose myself in the sex with a client like that, no matter how many times I had seen him before - I would always have to remain alert. Same goes for clients (rare, but still a concern) who try to take the condom off during sex.

The deciding factors for great sex with a worker, are similar to those with a 'regular' woman - if you 'click' (both sexually and emotionally/psychologically), you have trust and honesty and you treat each other with respect, you are likely to have a good time. If you want different things in bed, if one of you is 'faking it', if your personalities just don't gel, etc, then sex is likely to not be so good, whether you're paying for it or not.

My advice - if you're looking for a real GFE, don't choose a girl because of her looks or her age or her prices. Shop around, enjoying the variety of working girls out there, until one day you have mind-blowing sex with one that you feel a strong emotional, physical and/or sexual connection with. When you find that woman - stick with her.