Pattaya Reports

[Oosik]

I'm trying to hit the new bars from six months ago to keep my more or less perfect record. Perfection is a horrible mistress: I have to go places I know will suck. So far, though, they have been adequate, but certainly no standouts. Theses were, of course, just fifteen to twenty minute snapshots so YMMV.

Rich (WS): I was the only customer but it was only about 8:30. Average dancers but with decent boobage, which should be a word. Screw you, spell check! I fear the majority of the assets may not have been original equipment but there were some decent ones to look at, though their mounting brackets were, as noted, unremarkable.

Panda (WS): Seemed targeted at the Asian crowd. Above average lookers but no superstars. Tops came off around 9 PM.

Pin Up (WS): Average dancers but somehow each crew had one with serious baby damage stationed in front of me. Tops were off at 9:30.

Harem Club (WS): I was one of maybe three customers at close to 10:00. Poor selection and a waitress who really, really thought I should take a girl, any girl. Did not tarry.

Kink (LK Metro): At least the third name for this place in my visits. Some quite above average dancers, two of whom caught my eye, though only for one reason: Asses. One in particular was awesome. Conveniently the uniform of the day was that great measure of butts, the white thong. The minimum standard is to be able to see the full width for the full length, yet, of course, not to have concave butt cheeks and bones sticking out everywhere: I can see that stuff on charity telethons raising money for blighted areas. No, thank you, I don't tip concave butts. The other extreme are the intergluteal clefts that swallow the thong whole, so completely that one wonders if she is even wearing bottoms and then wonders why one would care. I know of those things: I went to a class in Oklahoma thirty years ago and they didn't even allow true thongs and the things STILL got devoured. It was not a good time in my life. Butt, uh, but this particular butt truly excelled. I could put up with slightly sub-par remainders just to do the doggie for hours. But I only got a glimpse of the rest since she was determinedly facing the other wall. It looked okay, but before I had a chance to get a better look all the dancers were chased off stage and lesbians descended from the heavens. If that is what is going on in heaven I'm going to start going to church. The ceiling above the stage lowered and atop it were six naked lesbians, the best kind, who just kept on lesbianing despite being returned to the earthly kingdom. Not a bad show at all, and they looked a lot better than the average at places like the Windmill and Sugar Baby. Sadly, they returned whence they came after just eight minutes. I believe that is why the stairway to heaven I was sitting beside was so busy. Then the next crew took the stage so the fine butt-wearer remained un-examined. Ah'll be baack.

Dolls LK (LK Metro): The former Kaos. Stages are still the same with the perilous transitions that tipsy girls in high heels must manage as they rotate through. Several cute ones. I was accosted by a well endowed young lady (I hope) from Chiang Mai who earned a drink by being well endowed, though again I doubt it was natural. Then it was stage time. The ass was a let down, but there was more: There was just a tad of LB look about her. Really nothing at all but it is one of those once seen things. I may return for more examination but to get there I have to pass Kink and that butt has priority.

I also hit Baccara just to get the Harem Club out of my mind. As always, a nice selection and I felt truly noble being the token farang. After just a few minutes again the dancers were chased off stage but the heavens did not rain lesbians, rather some very average looking dancers in fishnet outfits appeared, then the outfits disappeared and the dancers looked even more average. A bit of a let down.

I returned to Touch to see if my bed mate from last visit was still working (no) and had my childhood ruined by what appeared to be a porno version of Asterix. Those Gauls really swung some serious meat. I believe the baguette was developed in homage to them.

I still have something like ten bars to do. Not sure I'll make it with that butt on my mind.

[FL Hawk]

I wonder if, rather than food poisoning, you had the flu. I know two people who had symptoms very similar to yours, which turned out to be caused by one of this year's flu strains (as I recall, it's one that this year's flu vaccine gave only partial immunity for). The fever you had seems much more like a flu symptom than a food poisoning symptom (though I'm not a doctor). Muscle aches are also very common with the flu. Anyway, a thought. I'm glad you're feeling better!

I had considered the flu-like symptoms I was having possibly being unrelated to the runs, but when I told the pharmacist about the fever he said of course it was related as the body was fighting the infection that was causing the runs and fever. But beats me. It could have all been unrelated to Sizzler's, but I had eaten there about 10 to 12 hours before the symptoms started. The only other meal I had that day was breakfast some 20 hours earlier. The hotel does have a salad bar of sorts for breakfast, to include two types of lettuce, and other things that are left out in the open neither refrigerated nor heated. And the bacteria, if that is what is was, may have come form the ice in the drinks on Soi 6 or maybe I didn't rinse my mouth out good enough with bottled water after I brushed my teeth. Who knows?! For a while I was worried, given the flu like symptoms, I had picked up herpes or something! Yikes. But all seems well now and thanks for you all's comments and concerns.

The stuck pill in the throat feeling is not uncommon, only that it was a bit worse and lasted longer than typical. Years ago a had a throat issue and was examined by a radiologist who found an anomaly but as it wasn't causing me problems we didn't do anything. Maybe it is time to have it looked at again. Back then, they found a "pouch" that neither he nor my family doc had seen or heard of before.

To get back on topic, shortly I will be going to pick up my mystery girl for LT. Not sure what we will do, well, you know! Haha Her English isn't the greatest so that will be a challenge, but maybe we will hit WS or who knows. I will try to let her do what she wants. Later.

[Banana Boi]

Big rainstorm in Pattaya this afternoon around 2 pm. Supposedly it knocked out DMK. Strategically figured with the rain it was a great day to hit Kinnaree. Girls would have already arrived at work and no customers would come. Well I was half right. Definitely no customers. Maybe less than 10. However, only about 30 girls on a Friday afternoon. That's pretty low. On the good side lots of new faces to me. A handful ok. Overall looked like a younger bunch than usual. One short haired tall slim blonde I recognized from I believe Soi 6. Amazing long legs. Talked to her a bit and she seemed friendly but I chose my regular girl with bigger than average real tits instead.

Time to kill before I headed to Walking Street so thought I'd swing over to Soi Full Love Inn. No power at all so all bars were closed. Power had already been out for over 2 hours. Assume girls went home but a few were just hanging around outside. Stuck around a bit and talked to some of my regular girls.

[LittleBigMan]

I've never been to a Sizzler salad bar but I have the impression that it's a self-service restaurant and then it's not just the cook you need to be worried about. Everybody is using the same cutlery to collect the salad so all customers with dirty hands can spread bacteria and viruses.

That is true but as noted, people think because they go to Sizzler than a Thai restaurant it isn't going to happen shit happens anywhere! Sure there is but E-Coli man that kicks the shit out of you!

[YetAnotherGuy]

I am feeling better today and the throat lumpiness went away during the night, so no issues now. As I have had this come and go before, when I get home I will go see the doc.

I wonder if, rather than food poisoning, you had the flu. I know two people who had symptoms very similar to yours, which turned out to be caused by one of this year's flu strains (as I recall, it's one that this year's flu vaccine gave only partial immunity for). The fever you had seems much more like a flu symptom than a food poisoning symptom (though I'm not a doctor). Muscle aches are also very common with the flu. Anyway, a thought. I'm glad you're feeling better!

[Mogwai]

Sizzler salad bar, people think the name okay Things are cleaner etc. But if the cook or person preparing goes to the bathroom and doesn't wash their hands the water is dirty good luck no matter where you are?

I've never been to a Sizzler salad bar but I have the impression that it's a self-service restaurant and then it's not just the cook you need to be worried about. Everybody is using the same cutlery to collect the salad so all customers with dirty hands can spread bacteria and viruses.

[YearOfMonk]

Dear friends,

I'll be in Thailand in a few weeks. I am a well travelled man but this is only my second trip to Thailand. So I've been reading the backpages, & doing my research elsewhere as well. I've been using Thaifriendly, Thaicupid as well as Tinder to get a feel of things. So far, I've had better response from Pattaya girls, & I've been quoted from 3 k to 5 k for LT. Although most quotes have been for 3-4 K, one particular girl, who looks minimum 9/10 quoted 5 k for LT, with a caveat of covered FS & covered BJ. One other girl who looks 6/10 but seems really nice to talk to, has said that she will accept whatever I wish to give her, so a lot of variants you see. One girl who works at an MP here has quoted 4 k for LT, & says that she doesn't do it often (Well how obvious), & that she gets so many offers for 3 k LT but she denies at that rate, & so on.

My question to experts here is, since most girls on TF, TC etc. Are freelancers, so should I pay more than 3 k for LT? Or in other words, what are the going rates for LT these days? I know there is no set pattern to this, & each Girl warrants her own price, but I don't want to be conned, so seeking advice from experts here.

Thanks in advance.

[BonusParts]

Looking to barfine a beer girl LT. If I wanted to bring her to a disco where would be a good place with decent drink prices? Most of the stuff online is geared towards discos with the purpose of finding a FL but I don't particularly care for them. (FL Hawks recent 3 way is similar to experiences I have had) Are any of the Indian ones good? I am Indian.

[FL Hawk]

I am feeling better today and the throat lumpiness went away during the night, so no issues now. As I have had this come and go before, when I get home I will go see the doc.

I did have an emergency run to the toilet during breakfast, but I have been ok in the few hours since.

My Word program decided to shut down. I have been using Word 2010 and use it on a desktop and laptop, with only one or the other being used at any one time. But I upgrade both computers every couple of years, scrapping the old computer when I get a new one. Apparently I have loaded Office one too many times and it chose today to pretty much shut itself down, saying I exceed the number of loads my license allows. When I get home I might call MS, but perhaps it is time to upgrade, though I have an older version of Office that works good enough for what I need it for. But fortunately I did a major upload yesterday as I can not even copy the text over. I assume I can still use Word Pad. Hopefully I can keep you all updated.

I need to go as a Tender girl just contacted me.

[LittleBigMan]

That all depends. Sometimes you need something to go in and offset all the bad bacteria. In 2005 or 2006 I got travellers diarrhea after being down in Brazil. I did not know what it was at the time. I was going to the toilet about 18 times per day. I lost more than 30 pounds and my ass was so raw from all the wiping that all I could do was dab.

After about 6 weeks I finally went to the doctor and she knew right off what the problem was. She told me to go to CVS pharmacy and get lactobacillus, a probiotic that you take with dairy which could be bought over the counter. That shit (pun intended) cleared up in 1 day. These days I keep probiotic capsules in my toiletry kit for such cases.

Living here I try to blank out all the stuff I see and I've seen and can give you a hundred examples of how food is prepared and what they prepared it in. I hear people rave about how tasty the stuff they get from carts markets and I agree because I learned to blank it out and just enjoy I'm not starving. There are times I think about when I die and they cut me open bang " Alien " jumps out or a million of those white worms inside my organs.

Sizzler salad bar, people think the name okay Things are cleaner etc. But if the cook or person preparing goes to the bathroom and doesn't wash their hands the water is dirty good luck no matter where you are? Surprising after 15 years here I've only been sick runs once makes me think I'm really Thai now. It can happen anywhere in late 2016, I was taking a flight BKK-TPE-SFO, got a bowl of noodles during the layover in TPE, done it a number of times, although my brother order the same meal difference I ate the bean salad he didn't a few hours into the flight 12 hours to SFO stuck nowhere to go or run. The pain in my stomach was so bad all I was thinking about what should I or say to the F / A I certainly didn't want the plane to turn back or make an emergency landing in Hawaii?

I was going to shit in my pants on the airplane! Finally, I went to the back to explain to the crew she was kind and understanding enough to use the bathroom and put a sign out of order for me. I never push that flush button so much, in the end, I made the 12 hour flight but was so bad off I miss the family Thanksgiving reunion.

[Banana Boi]

You better get it checked out. Lump in throat, swollen lymph nodes, abdominal pain, weakness, and diarrhea sounds more like Hepatitis, bacterial infection, even STD especially if you recently partook in questionable acts and you are not known to do so. Good luck, but it sounds like more than a salad bar. Better safe than sorry.

At the very least sounds like strep throat and a case of food poisoning or a stomach virus requiring antibiotics. Agree with Redmau though, you should forego one afternoon on the 6 and go to the nearest hospital to get things checked out.

[Dive Monger]

Sorry you got that bug, FL Hawk! I have immensely enjoyed the reports from your trip, and have spent the last few hours catching upon the board as I have not been online here for some months. Many of your experiences mirror mine so much, the reports could have been of my trips. Last time in Pattaya, I found a gal in LK Metro who for me seems almost exactly as your "<redacted" gal is described. I was a very happy camper on my trip indeed, ended up taking her almost every night I was there (but still played in the afternoons). I also can only come once every several days, so I totally get where you are coming from in your reports.

Elarier there was the perennial repeated discussions of Bangkok vs. Pattaya etc. For me, more selection and a higher count of better looking ladies in Bangkok, but I do not get a super high success rate for whatever reason anywhere I monger. Like most, I am looking for that unicorn, a gal that give PSE and GFE together and just makes one happy and content and satisfied. So difficult to find anywhere! The lower cost point in Pattaya allows my budget to afford more screening of a higer number of applicants to find my 'keeper' for my trip. But always YMMV as we all have different goals, expectations, and aspirations.

Thanks again for those reports, it takes quite some time to put together such comprehensive missives.

P.S. I don't ever eat at salad bars anywhere, as they are the likeliest place to get an intestinal infection.

[RedMau5]

A real-time update. The next day I was down to about every hour and I was feeling a bit better and wanted to get out of the hotel and do what I came here to do. So, to cut the ties to the toilet, I decided to go get Imodium. It cured the runs immediately, but the fever remained for another day and I still felt a bit weak. I still do even now and am again bypassing WS so I can to bed early (11 PM) and get some decent sleep.

But also, starting today, I feel a tightness or lump in my throat, as if there is a stuck pill. I get that feeling occasionally and have for a few years, but it is more pronounced now. I can swallow ok, but having dined at the why on two different girls, one does think. But there is no soreness, just the feeling of a stuck pill.

To think earlier I was planning to go pick up a hot gogo girl to disappoint me. I just want to go to sleep. Maybe I am getting too old for this. Definitely experiencing the Pattaya Blues right now, though I just came back from a few hours with my secret girl that was nice.

Take care guys.

You better get it checked out. Lump in throat, swollen lymph nodes, abdominal pain, weakness, and diarrhea sounds more like Hepatitis, bacterial infection, even STD especially if you recently partook in questionable acts and you are not known to do so. Good luck, but it sounds like more than a salad bar. Better safe than sorry. Also if you seem sick be wary of all the rumors that can be spread by these Thai working girls.

[FL Hawk]

On this, my ninth trip to the LOS, I have finally succumbed to the Hershey Squirts, apparently from the Sizzler Salad bar.

A real-time update. The next day I was down to about every hour and I was feeling a bit better and wanted to get out of the hotel and do what I came here to do. So, to cut the ties to the toilet, I decided to go get Imodium. It cured the runs immediately, but the fever remained for another day and I still felt a bit weak. I still do even now and am again bypassing WS so I can to bed early (11 PM) and get some decent sleep.

But also, starting today, I feel a tightness or lump in my throat, as if there is a stuck pill. I get that feeling occasionally and have for a few years, but it is more pronounced now. I can swallow ok, but having dined at the why on two different girls, one does think. But there is no soreness, just the feeling of a stuck pill.

To think earlier I was planning to go pick up a hot gogo girl to disappoint me. I just want to go to sleep. Maybe I am getting too old for this. Definitely experiencing the Pattaya Blues right now, though I just came back from a few hours with my secret girl that was nice.

Take care guys.

[Mr Enternational]

WTF, this fucking shitty Sizzler salad bar made me sick twice back in 2009 and 2010. The first time I wasn't sure, but the second time I put the restaurant on my blck list. Take care.

LOL. Now that I think about it. When my mom and aunts came out to Thailand in 2011, my mom was scared to eat anything so they would eat at the Royal Garden Sizzler everyday. One of my aunts got sick for a few days as well.