Pattaya Reports

[Oldian]

She moaned in Thai about how she had finished (not sure what exactly she was saying, something like 'siao leew' – anyone care to translate this?), and that she needed a few moments because she was now sensitive.

She complained that she had tried to hold back but she came anyway so now she feels bad. I comforted her, telling her that it made me happy. Truth be told, I wanted to continue a little more – I had not really probed the inside of her pussy with my tongue, it had been almost entirely clit oriented. So after some convincing, we agree to shoot for #2. This time she was far more overtly responsive – groaning, wiggling, squirming, gasping, and coming in less than 5 minutes. She squealed some more about siao leew, and and we relaxed for a few moments to let her get her breath back. After a long 60 seconds, I indicated we should go for #3. She laughed, paused, and then petulantly heaved her hips upwards and stuck her pussy into my mouth!

Siaow translates rather interestingly. The first time I had a girl use it I assumed she was saying that she was turned on and excited. And when I looked it up in my dictionary, I was happy to see that it said, "the feel of the thrill of lust. " But then I saw the next definition for it which was "the feel of a sudden pain! " In subsequent trysts with young ladies, there have been several that shout, "siao, " and thrust my head/tongue into their nether regions at full force. But then there have also been a few who yell, "siao, " and try to push me away! So take your pick, just remember that whatever it is, it is damn exciting! (there is also the meaning of siao as in the thrill of sudden fear!)

[Amjeck]

Airport
Airport at 9pm had exactly 21 girls milling around (maybe some were in the back), and 9 customers, including Kumbu. The girls were rather subdued – the place had no energy, which is most unusual for Airport. I sat there for 15 minutes sipping a Coke, hoping no one would notice me. There were two girls who were kinda cute. One girl was heavy-thighed and big-butted, but she seemed to think a little too highly of herself. Another girl had the sweetest, sexiest face, with a slightly thick waistline. But long, sexy legs. Nothing inspired the most demanding Kumbu, and so I was intent on leaving.

I've noticed that Airport has really gone downhill in the last year or so. They used to have some good looking slim girls, but now they seem to be fat and below par.

[Kumbu]

This is part 2 of my 3-part series. This one has no sex in it, just musings about gogo hopping on a sweaty Monday night in Pattaya.

I walked out into the balmy Pattaya evening and headed towards WS. It was around 8pm, and I knew this was too early. So I stopped by Mr Sandwich and had a falafel. Not terribly god, but it got some calories into me. Then down to the far end of WS for a pick-me-up.

“A short Americano with two extra shots...yes two EXTRA shots...no, a triple Americano...yes, three shots total...short...three...thank you. Take out.”

I sat and sipped my beautiful brew for 30 minutes or so, and then strolled back down WS. I noticed that I was getting more 'welcoooooome' catcalls, to which I was more than happy to attribute to the linen shirt and extra hair gel.

My task was a tricky one. I had to troll the gogo bars, but I could not go to Baccara, Peppermint, or Cavern since that's where my girl and her gang reside. Furthermore, I could not go to Roxy or Naughty girl or Super Girl since there were girls in there who had a proprietary take on our relationship. So that left the choices kind of thin. Here were the options:
-Angelwitch
-Beach Club
- Happy
- Diamond
- SuperBaby
- Airport
- the one next to it, forget its name, Iron?
- Dollhouse
- Club Misty
- Shark
-One of the smaller rip-off joints like Cozy or Sweethearts.
- Or one of the slutty ones like Windmill or Babydolls

SuperBaby is out, for pricing and doll-like appearance reasons, Beach Club is out because girls are too skinny for me, Diamond is out because I've never had any luck there, Dollhouse is out because of my experience there last week, I don't care for the look of the girls in Iron, Club Misty sucks IMHO, as does Shark, and I'm not into being trapped in places like Cozy or watching banana-ice-fucking at Windmill. So that left Airport, Angelwitch and Happy. In that order.

Airport
Airport at 9pm had exactly 21 girls milling around (maybe some were in the back), and 9 customers, including Kumbu. The girls were rather subdued – the place had no energy, which is most unusual for Airport. I sat there for 15 minutes sipping a Coke, hoping no one would notice me. There were two girls who were kinda cute. One girl was heavy-thighed and big-butted, but she seemed to think a little too highly of herself. Another girl had the sweetest, sexiest face, with a slightly thick waistline. But long, sexy legs. Nothing inspired the most demanding Kumbu, and so I was intent on leaving. I was trying to stay as long as I could because it was hot out there and I wanted to cool down, but a girl eventually came and sat next to me. So I quickly grabbed my ticket and paid up.

Angelwitch
Walked into the steamy night, and up the soi to Angelwitch. Sat there with my Coke Light for 20 minutes looking at the rather uninspired offerings. There were 16 girls on stage, wearing their red fishnet stockings, but not even one of them were Kumbu-worthy. One of the waitresses who knows me from my various escapades in Pattaya chatted with me the whole time, trying to get me to commit (in a non-pushy way), but I told her flat out that there was no one that did it for me.

Smarmy English bastard
So off I go at around 9:35pm. Rather than head back down to WS, I went the other way, deeper into the soi, turned right, to Second Street, and then right again. This leads to a soi that can take you back down to WS. As I was walking down second street, a taxi pulls up and this white guy fiddles his way out and hops onto the sidewalk. I don't look at him, but through my peripheral vision, I notice that he is pale, sweaty, and very shifty-eyed. I already don't like the guy - He seems very...smarmy. Anyway, he sees me and in an English accent says to me:

Sweaty, Smarmy, Shifty-Eyed English Bloke: “Do you speak English?
Kumbu: mm-hmm
SSSEB: Do you know your way around here by any chance? I haven't a clue where I am.
K: mm-hmm
SSSEB: Do you know where Tower Hotel is?
K: Tower...umm....nope, sorry.
SSSEB: Are you English?
K: No, American
SSSEB: aw. Well anyway, it doesn't sound good, but I've just been with a Thai prostitute...
K: as have we all.
SSSEB: umm...yeah...anyway, she...blimey, you look like Thai people...
K: I'm not Thai people
SSSEB: That's not meant in a bad way. Anyway, she grabbed me wallet and took off while I was in the shower, and she stole 1000 quid, and I now don' t have a cent on me -
K: You need to go to the police, and don't you mean penny?
SSSEB: Umm, well I did, but the bastards told me all I can do is go to my consulate.
K: Yeah, that's right, and did you?
SSSEB: Well, no, but you see, the thing is I have to phone home coz me mum, you see, she's sick and I have to talk to her, otherwise she gets very upset. So all I really need is 10 quid...
K: (slaps SSSEB on his sweaty shoulder) Good luck my friend, I've never heard of Tower hotel, I hope you find it, take care. (walks away).
SSSEB: (sarcasm) Well thanks very much for your help, mate.

Asshole. Now that I think about it, I saw this very same guy in February, and back then he did the very same thing, and I reacted in exactly the same way. So this is his shtick. Beware of Sweaty, Smarmy, Shifty-Eyed English Bloke.

Happy Agogo
I went on my way to Happy Agogo. Ok, so I often go to Happy just to get a drink and admire the girls. There are three girls that I like to look at, and two of the three often give me subtle glances. The third one does not know I exist. She usually takes one look at me and that's the end of that. She has a really attractive face – it is a classic kind of Asian beauty, with high cheek bones, large eyes, and a really sophisticated feel to it. She does not smile, and just looks very model-esque. Nice to look at, but I think she would be high-cost and low-service. But still, very pleasant to watch while you sip your cold drink. So I was hoping she would be there to provide Kumbu with some visual therapy.

I walked in and the usher tried to stick me on a stool at the dance floor. Does he not know me yet? I do not do that – I need to be able to see the whole stage and see the whole girl. When you are up against the tree trunks you really can't see the whole tree, let alone the forest. So I wandered around the back until I found a suitable table a few feet from the stage.

I sat down, ordered my drink, and looked over the girls. Right before me was a new girl I had not seen before and she's looking right at me. We lock eye gaze, and she gives a sideways wink, I pucker my lips ever so slightly, she smiles and alluringly turns away. For the next five minutes we played looksies, but after a while the rotation of the girls took her out of my eyesight, so I turned my attention to the other girls.

And there she stood, the beauty of Happy, the one I was hoping would be there to sooth Kumbu's appetite for visual genius. She had just gotten onto the stage, and she was dancing her sophisticated dance, looking beautiful and everything, without a trace of a smile. And unusually, and to my great astonishment, she was looking right at me. This was surprisingly discomforting. I realized in that moment there is great safety in anonymity. She was looking right at me, and so I could not gaze unfettered at her to my heart's delight. Why was she doing this to me? Ah yes, linen and gel.

So now I played looksies with her for the next 10 minutes, and then I decided I just was not ready to commit to her, not even buy her a drink. I am not ready to play in this big league – I am an admirer, not a player, at least not with girls of this attitude. I was not in the mood for a high maintenance girl, and I kind of wanted to keep Happy as my safe-drink place. So I paid up before the rotation took her off the stage and I left without so much as a goodbye or a parting tip. Hopefully she will remember me as a cheap asshole and never pay me any attention again. That way I can come in and just look at her fine classic face and not be bothered with the whole lady drink, BF affair.

What to do next? I did not find anyone that even came close to my rimmer from Baccara. Do I feel like some rimming tonight? Maybe some anal? See, the downside to this girl is that she is a really energetic one. She is high energy, and she will drain me, both physically and mentally. Am I up for that? Well, let's see. I decided to go for it.

[Kumbu]

This is the beginning of a multi-part write up. As usual, much of it is mundane and background stuff, so not for everyone. But I'm hoping some of it is for some people.

I was in much better shape this time around than last time. My last visit to Pattaya was full of blurry memories, jetlagged fatigue and sluggish physicality. This time around, I have had several days of rest and recuperation (relatively), and I am ready to go.

The last time around, I sampled a tasty cutie from Baccara: perfect ass, perfect legs, superb attitude, loads and loads of fun. It would be tough to top that, but shit, that's what Pattaya exists for: to challenge the bounds of reason.

I just missed the 3pm bus from Ekkamai, so I had to sit in the sweltering heat for 25 minutes for the 3:30. As we came down, there was a ridiculous amount of truck traffic on the highway, making for slow going. Then around half an hour outside Pattaya we hit road construction, and so we were in stop-and-start traffic for 20 minutes. So I expected our arrival to be significantly delayed, but to my surprise, we arrived in Pattaya at exactly 5:50. So all the traffic and construction added 15-20 minutes to the trip.

Baht bus to hotel, shower, shave, and I sat down in front of the mirror for some serious soul searching. “Ok Kumbu, look me straight in the eyes and tell me what your plan is for tonight. Are you after madness or divinity? Perversion or sensuality? Filth or...well, is there anything other than filth?”

I looked myself in the eyes and thought long and hard. My answer? “Well, Kumbu, here's what I would like: I would like some perverted godly madness in a filthy sensual skin. Can I have some of that please?”

But more to the point, I really had to decide the practicals. Do I go back to Baccara for round 2 with rimming delightful cutie? Or do I try for something new? I decided I would hedge my bets. I would troll the bars and streets, and should I find something better, then I go for that. Should I not, then Baccara it is, on the hope that my girl has not been snapped up by some drunk fat bastard.

I also decided to do an experiment. I usually dress casual but clean, and I get a reasonable reception from the girls. I dress in jeans or slacks of some sort, and I usually wear a short-sleeved collared-shirt – nothing too fancy or spiffy, but clean and respectable (in the eyes of Thai girls at least). Truth be told, I would *never* dress this way in America – it is a very nerdy look. But girls here like it.

This time I decided I would dress up a little and see whether there is a noticeable difference in attention I get. And I wonder if the quotations for price would be higher with fancier dressing. By fancy dressing, it is relative of course, given that the majority of guys in Pattaya are wearing filthy t-shirts, ragged shorts and flip-flops.

I pulled out my finest linen shirt, a fresh pair of jeans, slapped on some hair gel, and then slapped on some more hair gel just for good measure. Ok, so not very fancy, but the linen shirt was really quite fetching. As I walked out of the room, I looked myself in the mirror one last time and said 'Go get 'em tiger.'

[Mong1225]

Want to make sure I don't under or over pay. Last year in Bangkok it seemed the average BF was 600 and the typical agreed price for ST was 1, 500 (the initial demand was typically 2, 000). LT, when offered, varied a great deal.

But it's supposed to be less in Pattaya right? What would you say is the average BF, initial demand, and final agreed price for the average WG in Patts, and how much for stunners? ST and LT.

Thanks guys.

[Asian Fetish]

AF,

Starting to sound like one of the old Seinfeld episodes.

LBM

hahahaha, so true, it's all said in a bit of fun, you know i've added a twist, a swirl, a tug and a pinch and have called it 'the dimitri'

[Jockmcloch]

I wonder if any well travelled person can clear something up for me. I remmember surfing the net once not too long ago and found a little note some where about a club/bar called 'bottoms up'. Looked and sounded interesting enough to perhaps include it in one of the places to visit, but for the life of me can't seem to be able to recall whether it's in Pattaya or Bangkok. All my searching so far has come up empty. Has anyone here been, seen or know of the place and where it is?

I'm not sure of one in bangkok or pattaya but there is one on tsimshatsui in hong kong. famous for the james bond scene being filmed there(the man with the golden gun). used to go there when i worked there 12 years or so ago but it wasn't really a very good place, only worth going cos they used to have gwailos working there topless and made a nice change from seeing flippers tits. maybe you thought it was in thailand cos a lot of that movie was shot there?

[ExpatCat]

I've decided to make gogo into a verb, as in:
- I gogo whenever I have the opportunity.
- When gogoing, one must be careful to hydrate
- Once upon a time, there gogoed three men.
- To gogo is human.

I believe it must be an intransitive verb, e.g., one cannot say 'I gogoed my best friend', meaning I took my best friend to a gogo bar, or 'Kumbu was gogoed by his best friend.' Anyway, that's my contribution to linguistics.

So. I'm back in Pattaya for a couple of nights of gogoing. I shall gogo until I am gogoed out. And of course, expect a report or two.

I am agog at the post. I guess you must have too much time on your hands at work. Go and get gogoed.

Cheers

Expatcat

[Steep]

I wonder if any well travelled person can clear something up for me. I remmember surfing the net once not too long ago and found a little note some where about a club/bar called 'bottoms up'. Looked and sounded interesting enough to perhaps include it in one of the places to visit, but for the life of me can't seem to be able to recall whether it's in Pattaya or Bangkok. All my searching so far has come up empty. Has anyone here been, seen or know of the place and where it is?

The only "Bottoms Up" bar I can think of is the famous one in Hong Kong (Wan Chai). Shown in a James Bond movie. I'm pretty sure it closed down a few years ago.

[Kumbu]

I've decided to make gogo into a verb, as in:
- I gogo whenever I have the opportunity.
- When gogoing, one must be careful to hydrate
- Once upon a time, there gogoed three men.
- To gogo is human.

I believe it must be an intransitive verb, e.g., one cannot say 'I gogoed my best friend', meaning I took my best friend to a gogo bar, or 'Kumbu was gogoed by his best friend.' Anyway, that's my contribution to linguistics.

So. I'm back in Pattaya for a couple of nights of gogoing. I shall gogo until I am gogoed out. And of course, expect a report or two.

[Kumbu]

Don't want to burst any bubbles here, but I've been doing that move since I was 16, I'm 37

I'm 21 years older than you and I'm been doing that move before you were born and it was taught to me so this move got to be really old?

I've got five years or so on you and the move was taught to me when I was at university, so I guess it's been around for a long, long time.

Now its confirmed it has been around a long long long time.

Gentlemen, gentlemen, gentlemen, ever heard of Rosalind Franklin? She was the person who originally discovered the structure of DNA. Unfortunately, she is not the one cited as the discoverer of DNA. That honor falls to Watson and Crick, who were the first to *publish* their research.

Being the first to publish a description of the move, I hereby claim discovery of said move, and officially dub it The Kumbu™.

[Amjeck]

I had to teach her how to give a BBBJ, which kills LBM erection!

LOL. I feel your pain. At least she didn't use a condom. CBJ is like erection death for like a day at least.

[LittleBigMan]

LBM, I've got five years or so on you and the move was taught to me when I was at university, so I guess it's been around for a long, long time.
GE

GE,

Now its confirmed it has been around a long long long time. Maybe we should start a club for this? It's cheaper than having to go to college to learn it?

I was just on Soi 6, the other evening and took one for the team. Cute white skin girl 25 years old no kids that look sixteen. Nice natural body but was just burn by her first boyfriend in the hometown and only been working for 8 days. Limited English and got as much as I could confirm in terms of service so I took my chances. As soon as we went upstair I had doubts, confirm great natural body but she didn't want to DFK, very juicy pussy but I had to teach her how to give a BBBJ, which kills LBM erection! In the end had her doggy and moaning ( most likely fake ) lick my right thumb and slipped it right into her ass and stroke it half dozen times. Nice body but won't take her again in fact I want another girl who works there but not sure how to go about it without pissing her off.


Enjoy LBM

[GoodEnough]

AF,

" Don't want to burst any bubbles here " you're only 37, I'm 21 years older than you and I'm been doing that move before you were born and it was taught to me so this move got to be really old? But I'm sure you added a twist and now it's your's. I like to believe I did the same?

But you're right you can only be born an assman. Starting to sound like one of the old Seinfeld episodes.

LBM

LBM, I've got five years or so on you and the move was taught to me when I was at university, so I guess it's been around for a long, long time.
GE

[LittleBigMan]

Don't want to burst any bubbles here, but I've been doing that move since I was 16, I'm 37 now and I can confirm that if done right, unrushed, it works everytime. (from my experience anyway).

I've always said that a person can only be born an assman, and the women know the immatators.

This definately sounded like a hot session, hopefully the rest of your adventures in patts will be just as fruitful. I look forward to reading more of your exploits. Hopefully some pics aswell.

AF,

" Don't want to burst any bubbles here " you're only 37, I'm 21 years older than you and I'm been doing that move before you were born and it was taught to me so this move got to be really old? But I'm sure you added a twist and now it's your's. I like to believe I did the same?

But you're right you can only be born an assman. Starting to sound like one of the old Seinfeld episodes.

LBM