Rio de Janeiro Reports

[Golfinho]

there are the whitest white people in Brazil. They are called gauchos, they are from Rio Grande do Sul.
I am an english teacher here. But the way my brain is wired is from: 4 years of officer candidate school and boxing during college in groups of dozens of fighters and or fellow soldiers, then 4 years of standing in front of mobile infantry dropping onto planets to squash bugs n groups of hundreds, then years of teaching kids in high school and coaching kids in football, and then law school, and then working at a law firm, hedge fund, and in the courts where in the cases I took I always won. So, I pick up social cues, micro expressions.

How does an ex-lieutenant commander / attorney find the time for a job?

Several hours from RJ up the mountain road to Novo Friburgo can be found 'white people. ' And don't forget your Corinthians shirt when you're in Sampa.

[Golfinho]

For those who didn't receive this email, and are eager to help this for-profit enterprise fill its begging bowl:

"Dear clients and friends.

For the last 21 months, the Coronavirus has devastated our travel business in Rio de Janeiro, leaving us financially and emotionally crippled. As you can see in our photo, one of our stores had to close and we've downsized to a single store.

Today, we're asking for your help in making sure our business will survive this pandemic.

Please take a look at Blame It On Rio Travel's GoFundMe page, and you'll understand what we've gone through in the last 21 months of the Coronavirus. It has greatly damaged our business. I hope you can help us out with a donation.

Please click here to visit our Go Fund Me page and help to ensure you have a home away from home here with us in Rio de Janeiro.

Love you all.

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Blame It On Rio Travel.

[Nounce]

...I paid 80 reais for a salad with chicken, a coke (for daisantra), and a orange juice today when we spent the afternoon at the top floor pool deck of the Hilton. Think about living for a month, maybe even supporting a family on 284 a month, the next time you pay 250 for a half hour of sex at your favorite terma, or pay 75 reais for a half our to shoot a wad at your next prive / clinica session...

I started the day going to Starbucks on the Monday that was a national holiday about a couple of weeks ago. I wanted to get a toast that was R $ 7 and a coffee that is more than R $10. There was a large number of visitors buying Starbucks souvenirs. I didn't want to wait in line because I carried a heavy laptop with me. I went upstairs to check out the place. There is a seat that you can see Sugarloaf mountain so I sat there to wait. My seat was immediately taken when I decided to go downstairs. I left and came to a local place that had a salgado and cafe combo for R $7. But the place was filled with firemen waiting to get breakfast. I moved on and arrived at Uruguayan station to find bread with egg and coffee that costs R $3.

It was a holiday so almost all restaurants are closed.

[Xpartan]

Pros and cons of carnival.

Pros.

+ Girls will bring their friends and do orgies. I once did a pernoite reverse gangbang with 4.

+ Dancing in the streets at blocos, if you train martial arts train harder.

Cons.

- costs 100% higher than normal.

- if your a self made diabetic due to your diet and unable to defend yourself due to lack of exercise then skip carvaval, in fact leave Brazil and don't come back.

Dude, your last sentence. Come on! That's harsh!

If it gets to the point when you have to physically defend yourself in the street of Rio de Janeiro, you likely have done something wrong to arrive at that situation.

I'm not saying you can always be in control in a foreign country, but there are plenty of things you can do to avoid becoming a victim.

Some of us aren't in the best of shapes, but that doesn't mean we should stay aside and let you, fit, beautiful and ex-military people, have all the fun in the world, LOL.

Like the bard said: "If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?

Rio Carnaval is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Every man with blood flowing through his veins must see and insert himself into that madness once. But I surely won't do it again, hence once-in-a-lifetime, LOL.

[DiverOyster]

I have been to 2 a2 in Botafogo many times through the years. It's a good club with a good cross section of people, from good average to a few 10's. On the other hand I have never been to ASHA in Barra as it is relatively new but I have spoken to many girls who've been there and they say it's the best. The place is new, big and the people are young and hot. My 2 cents enjoy!

Also 1000 reais is a little high to pay the girl but if shes really hot and because of her you get to swap at least 2 to 3 times with another hot girl then the extra few dollars shouldnt matter much. Occasionally you may come across a girl who says shell swap but in the club she refuses to. On the other hand you can get a girl who is a great partner and even initiates a swap, theyre the best. Good luck.

Thanks RioBob. You are our resident expert on the swinging scene in Rio. Yes, if I can swap her for just one hot civilian I would consider the 1000 an absolute bargain for the experience of banging a hot cv. I have decided to go to ASHA since I read that it's the most modern and beautiful swing club in Rio.

[SoberHans69]

Up to a couple of days before carnival all should be good and the same after. Everybody needs to make money.

Brilliant, thanks.

[Vagabundo1]

Pros and cons of carnival.

Pros.

+ Girls will bring their friends and do orgies. I once did a pernoite reverse gangbang with 4.

+ Dancing in the streets at blocos, if you train martial arts train harder.

Cons.

- costs 100% higher than normal.

- if your a self made diabetic due to your diet and unable to defend yourself due to lack of exercise then skip carvaval, in fact leave Brazil and don't come back.

Going to try and make my first trip to Brazil, third time trying, around about March time.

Planned to go at the end of February but just realized this is Carnival time and won't be ideal for mongering.

How many weeks before Carnival is mongering normalish and how long after does it get back to normal?

Thanks.

[Rio Bob]

Going to try and make my first trip to Brazil, third time trying, around about March time.

Planned to go at the end of February but just realized this is Carnival time and won't be ideal for mongering.

How many weeks before Carnival is mongering normalish and how long after does it get back to normal?

Thanks.

Up to a couple of days before carnival all should be good and the same after. Everybody needs to make money.

[SoberHans69]

Going to try and make my first trip to Brazil, third time trying, around about March time.

Planned to go at the end of February but just realized this is Carnival time and won't be ideal for mongering.

How many weeks before Carnival is mongering normalish and how long after does it get back to normal?

Thanks.

[Rio Bob]

I struck a deal with a Solarium hottie to accompany me to a swing club this Friday night. I will pay her 1000 R for about 4 hours to bang her in the swing club and she is also open to being swapped. I googled swing clubs in Rio and found 2 clubs: 2A2 in Bogofota and ASHA in Barra. Anyone has been to these 2 clubs lately and can recommend one over the other? Many thanks in advance.

I have been to all the swing clubs in Moema in Sao Paulo but this is my first time checking out the swing clubs in Rio.

I have been to 2 a2 in Botafogo many times through the years. It's a good club with a good cross section of people, from good average to a few 10's. On the other hand I have never been to ASHA in Barra as it is relatively new but I have spoken to many girls who've been there and they say it's the best. The place is new, big and the people are young and hot. My 2 cents enjoy!

Also 1000 reais is a little high to pay the girl but if she’s really hot and because of her you get to swap at least 2 to 3 times with another hot girl then the extra few dollars shouldn’t matter much. Occasionally you may come across a girl who says she’ll swap but in the club she refuses to. On the other hand you can get a girl who is a great partner and even initiates a swap, they’re the best. Good luck.

[Vagabundo1]

Do girls at the clubs speak English? No.

I got up this morning and the first PM I received is one worth answering in detail.

My answer is below.

But it bears explanation.

I don't speak Portuguese fluently. But what I am is a social learner. Many of our group are not. Many of us are actually very bad at social skills. If you need to go to 4 x4, generally, this means you.

Let's start with dress.

Wear a Vasco mask and shirt. The mask costs 1.5 r at rua alfandega. That is 60 cents. The locals are always, always, always looking at you and searching for social cues because if they are looking at you, from the lowest tier hooker and beach vendor, to the minister of finance looking for a Swap line, they are asking for money. If a Brazilians mouth is moving? He is asking for money. If a Russians mouth is moving. He is lying.

When they look at your mouth, they should see vasco. Why vasco? Because it is not flamego. Because vasco has a noble history, a history of being a christian crusader, etc. Then your shirt. MichaelSamuel, to his everlasting credit, on his first and second trips, wore a vasco shirt, even went to a game. Took off the rich world ball cap. Even if you are the whitest white, there are the whitest white people in Brazil. They are called gauchos, they are from Rio Grande do Sul.

Italians and Germans moved to Rio Grande do Sul in 3 waves -- 1898, post WW1, post WW2. There are cities in Rio Grande do sul that only speak German. Gisele Bundschen is from there. Barra in Rio is the Rio Grande do Sul of Rio de Janeiro state. (Niteroi and that side of g bay is the nordeste of RJ state, with more darker skinned persons).

OK, if you want good sex, you need to be able to speak the Brazilian Portuguese. I was fucking a girl in darkroom the other day, and it was all, "frango assado" lots of laughter. That is missionary anal. Etc. Then I broke into my fantasy is Vasco policia (she, Beatrice is vasco), and Flamengo vagabundo because for a good dupla you must make one girl dominate the other. Everyone gets that. Having the girls wear the soccer shirts is a winner during a dupla. Huge pro tip right there.

I am an english teacher here. But the way my brain is wired is from: 4 years of officer candidate school and boxing during college in groups of dozens of fighters and or fellow soldiers, then 4 years of standing in front of mobile infantry dropping onto planets to squash bugs (allusion to starship troopers by heinlein) in groups of hundreds, then years of teaching kids in high school and coaching kids in football, and then law school, and then working at a law firm, hedge fund, and in the courts where in the cases I took I always won. So, I pick up social cues, micro expressions, smiles, the dirty look from the flamengo hot as fuck mulatta who is top of my list at the prive who I didn't do, and then verbal judo her into a laugh by saying maybe flamengo polica, vasco vagabundo (ie, she puts the vasco girl into submissive roles, like eating her pussy and my dick, on a leash, spanks the vasco vagabunda's ass, etc).

OK, you lurkers who never post and you other cultural imperialists there is your lesson.

Go on youtube and listen to porta dos fundos. You could even play some of those episodes.

You go into a session at a prive, give her a massage first (hat tip to jimmy boy).

You get the terma girl to your place, give her a massage and learn how to eat pussy well enough so she orgasms.

You've got some source of rich world income, so you are by local standards rich.

OK, at the very first level, what you wear, at least show some mfing effort, which is the first step in communication (and security). Wear a vasco shirt and mask. Better yet, wear a bombeiro shirt and gear so you look like a off duty bombeiro who is a vasco fan if you don't open your mouth. The locals will talk to you, to probe you for intel, because they are asking for money. Even the good Brasileiros ask you for money, like the college administrators supporting my course -- they ask me to pay the admin types who market, because a retired lieutenant commander has money.

The first words out of my mouth when I first meet a new carioca such as a cab driver is "vc carioca the gema?" the usual answer is yes. (meaning both their parents were cariocas). Then I say, ëyou sou carioca the fake" because it's a little funny. It is not dave Chappelle netflix special funny, but it is a self aware joke. My accent give away that I am a fake, with my vasco mask, etc.

I have actually translated in termas. For dodochen, for example, I talked to the big titted loira in Mosaico, and translated whether she would do anal, how much, etc. I will do that if you're a good wingman, basically share the uber, share a meal, etc. But if you want better sex, even with a hooker, even in her casa, you need to learn some porto. Go to the effing library and check out a porto course on CD rom, and digitize it to your cloud, and listen to it while you go to sleep, and play it all night, do it over and over like it is that or castration as a penalty, because the locals can give you bad sex, like is so often reported here by heart broken in love mongers like zebra fretting over the tier 1 girl he fell in love with who, he was shocked, shocked, to learn was back at work at monte carlo, or you can do a little bubba boy mini relationship good sex move by blending into the local culture a little more. But, whatever, what do I know.

My answer:

No.

Dear Vagabundo1:

I have RTFF going back over a year, but still have an earnest question for the experienced board members who have been to Scandallo (and other (not quite as good?) Sampa area clubs): are there ladies there in any significant number night in and night out who can speak passable English?

While I am semi-fluent in Spanish, I don't find (at least my level of) Spanish a reasonable substitute for Brazilian Porto. And I would not like my hopes/chances on finding the "needle in the haystack" English speaker. Yeah, yeah, I realize that cash/effectivo can do a lot of the speaking for me (along with a Google or other translator app), but as we all know, actually being able to communicate (at least a little) beyond $$ or stilted stiff translator app back and forth goes a long way in enhancing the chance for a stellar sessions or, indeed, sessions. Wish I were better at languages -- and can already hear the knee-jerk response that I simply need to learn some Portuguese; but answer me this, at least at those higher level clubs -- any ladies in any reasonable numbers that speak passable English?

[Sperto]

It seems like there will be a New Years celebration again in Rio de Janeiro, unless the covid-situation gets worse.

https://g1.globo.com/rj/rio-de-janei...carnaval.ghtml

[DiverOyster]

I struck a deal with a Solarium hottie to accompany me to a swing club this Friday night. I will pay her 1000 R for about 4 hours to bang her in the swing club and she is also open to being swapped. I googled swing clubs in Rio and found 2 clubs: 2A2 in Bogofota and ASHA in Barra. Anyone has been to these 2 clubs lately and can recommend one over the other? Many thanks in advance.

I have been to all the swing clubs in Moema in Sao Paulo but this is my first time checking out the swing clubs in Rio.

[Vagabundo1]

Isgers in town.

Gato1, Ben, pv, safado69, Christian g.

I am doing a pernoite with Belladonna, 500 reais. All is well.

Yesterday, I did a darkroom girl, Beatrice. She was recommended by Christian G. Good call. 22 years old, great performer. 2 shots. 160 r.

Summer has started. Hot AF blond obvious hookers on the elevator at Transamerica, lots out at the pool. All I do every day is go to the pool, fuck, rinse repeat.

[Member #4729]

Which of you degenerates will be around Christmas and New Years?

I'm incoming in a couple weeks, staying in Copa / Ipa.

My preferred sex procurement activities are Termas and Mabs.

My pronouns are he / him / sir / daddy.

My diet is ketogenic.

My fitness level is hot step-dad.

PMs now open no gay please, but MMMF gang / blowbangs ok.