San Jose General Reports

[Straddler]

For perspective, I have been coming to CR since 1999 and have made probably 11 trips, the last being in 2011.

Here I am again in 2017 for affordable dental work & I was soon reminded why I stopped coming here back in 2011 for fun: it's all the fat chicks. So much fat! (newspaper article in 2016 says 67% of Costa Ricans are overweight. https://thecostaricanews.com/more-th...ight-or-obese/).

I got in on a Saturday (Travel tip from someone who has come here a lot: take the Bus from the airport. Costs maybe $1.00 and you can either push the button if it drives by your stop downtown, or take it to the city center and catch an Uber, or taxi. You will of course need coins "monedas" because the bus fare is so low, so I went to trade in $100 at the money exchange in the airport. Be sure to ask the person to be sure to give you monedas para el autobus). So, on a Saturday, I checked into the apartamento I found on AirBnB, then went hunting. (Another travel tip: apartamentos give you a key and don't care who you bring back, although best to get an "entire place" rental, not just a room, if using AirBnB and also confirm with host that no problem if I bring a novia back with me, as some places on AirBnB specifically say they do not allow the ladies in).

Monica's. I had never been but read great reviews here. It was like 4-5 pm on a Saturday. There were two chicas available, both stout, but I found the 18 yr old Emma to have a cute face. The place was fine for 14 k colones ($24) but even Emma had a belly and arm fat.

Del Rey. Ok, so later that night, after some food at Tin Jo (great Asian place on same street as Idem why Relax) I decided to go to ground zero, the Blue Marlin bar. In the past, say '99 through '09, that place was always a sure bet. There would be dozens if not a hundred ladies there. And even then you could find several to pick from. The hotties outnumbered the fatties. Times have certainly changed. It may have been early, only 7-8 pm, but was I disappointed. I sat through several beers trying to figure out which was the "least fat", and there were only like 15-20 ladies in the whole place. I was about to leave when I met a 23 yr old tica Angie. Her legs looked good in her jeans and her shirt was tight and seemed to show no belly fat. 40 k and we were off (note: there was a snotty bartender in that place, at the main bar, she was a real *****. She made sure to act like she really hated giving out beers or something. Must be bc tips are included in the price. Also, one of the DelRey security guard guys actually said I should tip the security guards after I asked him when Key Largo was going to open up). Again, very surprised that Key Largo wasn't even open yet at like 7 pm on a Saturday.

Anyways, that Angie chick from DelRey? Yep, she was fat, too. Soon as the clothes came off, I realized she had some kind of magical jeans on which disguised her fat. And she must've been wearing a tight elastic shirt, too, bc she had a beer belly!

Sunday. New Fantasy & the Havana place (I knew it as Zona Blue long time ago) and it used to be good, but there were 2 ladies on that day. Yes, both thick, one was very thick. So I walked up to New Fantasy. Back then all the ladies were in that one room and you could see them through the window. Now they have it set up like a club with loud music. There were 4 or 5 ladies available at the time I walked in. Each was very fat! I decided to go with the least fat, she called herself Estephanie. Very nice, friendly. She tried to upsell me on things like kissing, or no condom, but I just needed to busta nut. It wasn't easy busting a nut to a chica that weighed more than me and had nasty c-section scar looking at me, but I somehow managed.

What is it with New Fantasy now? Aside from the ladies I saw all being overweight, and a couple even obese, the place has gone downhill big time: the sheets and towels were nasty (torn and war-stained) and only cold water in the shower. And that dank carpeting all over the place is likely full of odd stuff. Not pleasing to walk on with bare feet.

Anyways, I'll report back after this week is out, and let you know if I just ran into some bad luck. But one thing seems certain: the ladies here in CR are getting really fat.

[DaveGave8]

Anyone know if the Holiday Inn or Sleep Inn is chica friendly? I may need to stay there for non-pro reasons.

[DaveGave8]

Since I was not impressed with my usual spots: the Del Rey, Little Havana and Sportsmen Lodge I decided to go unconventional and try the non-pro game.

I downloaded Tinder and began to swipe right every chica. Surprisingly I had 10 matches of non-pros and 1 pro. The 1 pro was from Venezuela with a decent body. I rate her a 8. She asked for 100 usd and I offered 60 usd for 1 HR. She refused and said 80 for 1 HR. She wouldn't move from 80, so I swept left. Next, I came across a Colombian who lives 10 km outside the city and has a baby with a local rich Tico. She agreed to meet if I download the app Snapchat, to see if my pic was real on tinder. My pic wasn't real but she still couldn't tell the difference LOL. She drove the car her ex bought her to my hotel. Once, I told her where I staying he was in an uproar, as she was a non-pro and offended I was staying at a quasi-brothel. I slowly calmed her down and told her I didn't know. It's my first time in San Jose (a lie). She said OK and entered. 2 hours of hot passion and she didn't even ask for gas money. I had 3 other tinder dates that same day. Most of the women lived far outside the city and did not think highly of San Jose. They complained about the Hotel Del Rey is an embarrassment to the city. Gringos only come here to fuck pros etc. If I had more time I could have banged completely free on tinder instead of the p4 p game. But, I did take these chicas out to eat or starbucks, so some money was spent. The P4P game has gone to the shits in San Jose. All the top quality women must be gone for the holidays because it's a complete shit show with 5's and 6's asking for 100 usd.

Apparently women aged 18 to 29 are fond of using snapchat to communicate. Most chicks from tinder used that show some tits and ass before they visited. One even sent me a pic of her pussy saying welcome to snapchat baby. LOL.

I say all this to say. If you are looking for higher quality women that are non-pros who just want to go on a date and fuck. It's possible in San Jose, but you have to be there for longer than 3 days to reap the benefits. I also decided to find non-pros at McDonalds near the plaza. Surprisingly, I was successfully with one negrita walking up to get an ice cream cone. I spoke in broken Spanish enough to get the number and she was interested. We went out the next day. She was also turned off that I was staying in a quasi-brothel. She said it's embarrassing for her to go there. Shit! I didn't plan for this from non-pros. I began to tell her how it was a mistake and she took the bait. 2 hours of fucking no cash involved. You got to love being a gringo.

Part 3 coming soon: I will visit the casas.

[World Travel 69]

I believe the better chicas have gone to the Hotel Cocal in Jaco.

They are asking double of what the chicas in the Del Rey ask.

According to my guide book, Baby boomers fucked that up.

I last visited San Jose in 2012. It seems that very little has changed about the city. No construction or new buildings. The economy seems stable. This trip report is primarily for people who have never been to San Jose or haven't been there in a long time. Day 1, I went to my regular spots to see if everything was the same.

Little Havana. Went there Friday afternoon. Only 3 girls working and all were 5 or below. 2 chicas were sitting down and stared at the wall when I entered, while one acted like she wanted to earn pesos. 1 HR /$60 damage on site seems a little much these days for a 5 and below, but who cares. Her skills were a 9. I returned Saturday night to Little Havana at 8 pm. 2 chicas inside and both were 4's. I left for better options.

Sportsmen Lodge. What a shit show. Full of Ticas with bad breath and high prices. Aggressive chicks looking for 1 HR /100 rate. Not worth it. I tried the breakfast there. It was decent with rice and eggs, toast and pineapple. The one good thing about the S. Lodge is they don't charge for guest. The fucking hotel rooms are a shit show too. Similar to a Motel 8 in the USA Cost $65/ per night + tax. Walls are thin and you can here noise outside. However, you can save on the cost of the guest fee.

Hotel del Rey. What the fuck has happen to the quality of women in the Del Rey? Most mongers come to Costa Rica to bang blanca Colombian mujeres. For the first time the majority of women I saw in the Del Rey were Ticas. Almost 100% of the women have kids with bad see-section scars or stretch marks. I banged 2 of the best Ticas I could find in the Del Rey and they both had mediocre to bad service. None of them can take dick bigger than 5' repeatedly. They say you have un hora sexo, but they can only really fuck for 20 minutes and try to spend the rest of the time sucking dick thru a condom. Then they have the nerve to tell you it cost $20 more to suck dick without a condom. Ironically, I spent the majority of my time banging Dominican women, which I find them to be more athletic in the bedroom. But I did not fly to Costa Rica to fuck Dominicanas LOL. Every chica in the Del Rey approached me with the $100 usd for una hora and I talked each one down to $60. Usd.

Trip report to be continued.

[DaveGave8]

I can never tell another man what to do with his money but tipping 100% is ridiculous. It's called inflation and cost of living. Those type of tips don't impress working girls my friend. [Deleted by Admin]

Please use your head.

The one above your shoulders.

You tip like that and you drive up the prices.

The locals can not afford it!

And I can't either.

[DaveGave8]

I last visited San Jose in 2012. It seems that very little has changed about the city. No construction or new buildings. The economy seems stable. This trip report is primarily for people who have never been to San Jose or haven't been there in a long time. Day 1, I went to my regular spots to see if everything was the same.

Little Havana. Went there Friday afternoon. Only 3 girls working and all were 5 or below. 2 chicas were sitting down and stared at the wall when I entered, while one acted like she wanted to earn pesos. 1 HR /$60 damage on site seems a little much these days for a 5 and below, but who cares. Her skills were a 9. I returned Saturday night to Little Havana at 8 pm. 2 chicas inside and both were 4's. I left for better options.

Sportsmen Lodge. What a shit show. Full of Ticas with bad breath and high prices. Aggressive chicks looking for 1 HR /100 rate. Not worth it. I tried the breakfast there. It was decent with rice and eggs, toast and pineapple. The one good thing about the S. Lodge is they don't charge for guest. The fucking hotel rooms are a shit show too. Similar to a Motel 8 in the USA Cost $65/ per night + tax. Walls are thin and you can here noise outside. However, you can save on the cost of the guest fee.

Hotel del Rey. What the fuck has happen to the quality of women in the Del Rey? Most mongers come to Costa Rica to bang blanca Colombian mujeres. For the first time the majority of women I saw in the Del Rey were Ticas. Almost 100% of the women have kids with bad see-section scars or stretch marks. I banged 2 of the best Ticas I could find in the Del Rey and they both had mediocre to bad service. None of them can take dick bigger than 5' repeatedly. They say you have un hora sexo, but they can only really fuck for 20 minutes and try to spend the rest of the time sucking dick thru a condom. Then they have the nerve to tell you it cost $20 more to suck dick without a condom. Ironically, I spent the majority of my time banging Dominican women, which I find them to be more athletic in the bedroom. But I did not fly to Costa Rica to fuck Dominicanas LOL. Every chica in the Del Rey approached me with the $100 usd for una hora and I talked each one down to $60. Usd.

Trip report to be continued.

[World Travel 69]

Please use your head.

The one above your shoulders.

You tip like that and you drive up the prices.

The locals can not afford it!

And I can't either.

Actually, using the quick and dirty dollar to colones conversion I actually tipped her $40. The service was good and this was an insignificant amount of money. She went out of her way to please. I don't know about you or what your beliefs are but I am not an asshole.

[Pulled Pork]

So let me get this straight- it was $30 for half hour and you tipped her $35 because the covered BJ was the best you ever had? Wow.

I'd rather say nothing more because what I am about to say does not include nice words for this kind of behavior.

Actually, using the quick and dirty dollar to colones conversion I actually tipped her $40. The service was good and this was an insignificant amount of money. She went out of her way to please. I don't know about you or what your beliefs are but I am not an asshole.

[Frankfurt]

So let me get this straight- it was $30 for half hour and you tipped her $35 because the covered BJ was the best you ever had? Wow.

I'd rather say nothing more because what I am about to say does not include nice words for this kind of behavior.

I went to Pension Monica yesterday. I want to say that the fee was $30 for a half hour. The girl that opened the door was tall with a nice figure. I would say she was her early 20's. I paid the fee to the owner behind the cage and he said pick one. There were about 4 women there so I picked the one who opened the door. Again, she was in her early 20's and had a nice rack and a full back. Got to the room and she started with an amateurish HJ. I had to tell her to put some lube on it. The she said "blow job com condom" and I said yes. The BJ was actually very good. A lot of deep throating. She stopped to ask me if I liked it. The FS was pretty good. At the end I tipped her another 20,000 Colones and she could not stop thanking me which means I over tipped her. Before I leave I will come back, all of the other women were attractive and sexy.

[Pulled Pork]

I went to Casa Portuguese yesterday. It is on Calle 6 between Ave 3 and 5 I believe. There are three "massage" place in a row on this street and I poked my head in each one. One first glance I thought I had wasted my time. There were at least 50 women in the three places but none that I would find appealing. Also, these places were full of geriatric gringos pumped up on Viagra and Geritole. There was a bar underneath one of the Pensions so I had a couple of beers there. I also went to a bar called the Viking bar around the corner and had a few beers there to. As I loosened up I decided to go back to Casa Portuguese because there was one woman there with a very large chest. I went back and she was not there I met a smaller slightly chunky woman said let's go in Spanish so I went. She gave a very good BJ and was very enthusiastic. I paid 7000 colones and tipped her 10,000 colones. She was very happy. Some details about the place. The room was dirty, the bed seemed dirty and the place itself was dirty. I would not repeat.

[Pulled Pork]

I went to Pension Monica yesterday. I want to say that the fee was $30 for a half hour. The girl that opened the door was tall with a nice figure. I would say she was her early 20's. I paid the fee to the owner behind the cage and he said pick one. There were about 4 women there so I picked the one who opened the door. Again, she was in her early 20's and had a nice rack and a full back. Got to the room and she started with an amateurish HJ. I had to tell her to put some lube on it. The she said "blow job com condom" and I said yes. The BJ was actually very good. A lot of deep throating. She stopped to ask me if I liked it. The FS was pretty good. At the end I tipped her another 20,000 Colones and she could not stop thanking me which means I over tipped her. Before I leave I will come back, all of the other women were attractive and sexy.

[DaveGave8]

Anyone in SJ this weekend and want to hang out let me know. Msg my inbox.

[Gagoo]

I asked a guy at the front desk about if they will close down. He strongly said that is not true. He didn't seem to want to talk about it anymore than that. I have some more to write about the other places, but I just got here to Medellin today and I need to take a nap.

[Gagoo]

Last time I heard that the ownership of del Ray changed and the new owner, lady, wants to make it a family place. No more girls. Can someone confirm this with me?

I've been going there once or twice a day for 5 days now. It all seems normal to me. A couple days ago one of the rooms had a fire though. A chica told me one of the air conditioning units caught on fire. She told me she happened to be in the next room. LOL She said a lot of people panicked. Anyways, the bar was open the same night when I went. A different girl told me about the fire and said she went home for the rest of the day. I will go to the DR tonight and ask the front desk about this rumor of closing.

[Gagoo]

Okay, the Morazan has always been my favorite hotel because it's cheap, right in the heart of the gulch, and the people have always been nice. And let's not forget our favorite: Ricky Ricardo, the World's Greatest Bell Boy! LOL.

So okay I was told the new owners took it over about 8 months ago and have renovated. New tv's, new curtains and a few other things here and there. "That's nice" I thought.

I called earlier in the week to make my reservation and the girl who answered the phone said there were plenty of rooms for Thur and Fri and I didn't need one. I thought that seemed odd because I've often seen it full on Fri's in the past so I said "Well let me make a reservation anyway. ".

She insisted I didn't need one so I said okay and g'bye and hung up the phone.

On 2nd thought I decided to go ahead and make one anyway, via expedia. Good thing I did because the place WAS FULL and I might not have gotten a room had I not made my reservation via Expedia. Strike one. Some idiot desk clerk who was apparently too lazy to make a reservation for me!

So I showed up around noon on Thur and check in technically isn't until 3 pm but they usually accommodate me and get me in by 1 or so. I had asked for an interior room because they're quieter and they said they'd try so he said to come back in an hour or so.

I did and they checked me in to a room on the 4th floor, NOT an interior room but I didn't complain, I just wanted to lay down for a while, I was tired from the long trip in to San Jose.

Well as soon as Ricky walked out, I noticed the room stunk from sewage. I went down to the desk and the guy said "Oh. Okay, yeah sometimes it does. But you'll have to wait a while for another room. Here, go up and check this one and he gave me a key and I went up but the new room was still dirty but at least did not stink.

The maid was there and looked at me like what are you doing, didn't you just check into the other room?" I told her it stunk and she went in and said it didn't. I said "Well then there's something wrong with your nose because it definitely does smell and I showed her it was coming from the toilet but the toilet was clean, it was the sewer. She said no and was obviously pissed because I didn't want to take the room.

I said "Well the guy downstairs said yes it does sometimes smell and no I don't want to smell sewer. " I was actually very nice to her but she was starting to make me mad insisting it didn't smell when it obviously did.

In fact soon her manager came up and checked and she confirmed that it smelled and said they'd get me the other room soon.

Long story short it took about 45 min for the maid to get my new room clean because instead of jumping ahead down the line to my room she just went down the hall in order while I sat by the elevator so tired I could barely sit up! WTF?! All she had to do was clean my new room first, but noooooo!

So: yes they renovated the rooms to some degree but.

-the faucet still dripped.

-the lamp had loose wiring to the point it made me think it might catch on fire, and.

-the door key-card didn't work right.

I complained about the key because I didn't want to come up with my girls and have trouble getting into my room at night when there's no staff around to fix it. They said they'd send someone up but never did. Surprise surprise.

I also.

-didn't get a floor towel, and.

-there was no hot water the next morning when I wanted to shower.

Okay so the next day I asked for a floor towel and she gave me one but when I came back I noticed.

-there was no hand towel this time.

I usually get the little chubby maid and she's great but this one really sucked at her job.

I gave her a good tip the first day anyway because I wanted an extra bath towel in case I brought 2 girls back (which I did). She said she'd give me one but I had to wait for some reason. Well.

-she never did bring it so I was short a towel that night.

Meanwhile when I brought back my 2 girls the guy at the desk told me I'd have to pay $25 extra for the extra girl. I said "What? I've been coming here 25 years and never been charged for an extra girl!" New owner, new policy he says. I said I'd pay it for now but would talk to him later.

After the girls left (see my report on that below) I asked him if they could waive the $25 extra charge because I never have been charged that and after all since the room is only $50 a night.

-how do they figure $25 for only one extra girl for one hour, and hell I couldn't even get an extra towel so where is the justification for more money for an extra girl? Where is the added expense?

He said I could take it up with the manager tomorrow so I said I would do that.

On check out the girl at the desk had printed out the fine print policy which did state there was a $25 extra charge but what good is that written policy if they don't tell you that or even show you the paper when you check in?

I said that I didn't mind paying a reasonable extra fee but $25 extra is a gouge and I don't like being gouged. I'm sure someone here will say I'm being too uptight and complaining too much but I disagree. I think it's just unreasonable to charge $25 for one extra guest for one dammed hour! And not even an extra towel.

So while in spite of the lack of towels, the refusal to fix my door key, the lousy lamp, no good place to charge my phone, no hot water in the morning. And now no fruit with breakfast either (now THAT's cutting corners! Fruit is cheap in Costa Rica! I would still stay at the Morazan but for the $25 extra charge. 3 somes are my thing and so that basically increases my room rent 50%! I think $10 extra would be fair.

So. I will now probably go to a different hotel even if it's the same or more money just out of not wanting to be gouged that way.

Things are certainly changing in the Gulch!

It was explained to me a few days ago that 1 girl is free per day, or maybe if you give it a few hours you can bring another girl in for free. But if you bring in 2 girls at once they will charge $25 for the 2nd girl. The guy I see most of the time seems cool and easy to talk to. You might talk to him before hand, and slip him 10 bucks or something. Maybe you go to the restaurant on the 2nd floor for a little bit, then go to your room. Out of about 8 showers so far it was fine except one time it took about 5 minutes to get hot water. My complaints are only about the noise from Key Largo and my room has no refrigerator. My room has a desk, but some don't. I was upgraded for free to a room with a balcony, but it had no desk. So, I chose a room with a desk. Book it on Orbitz. If you are a member at Orbitz, lately I get the room for $46 a night final price, just use the 15% coupon codes they always have. Also if you use an Orbitz credit card and use a phone or tablet to book you will get 10% in Orbucks. True price will be about $42 a night. That's the current price though. I'm sure it fluctuates.