General Reports

[Baxter Slade]

Hey Tom,

I enjoyed reading the weekend romp, it was quite entertaining. After reading about your travels I try to hit the shithole bars you report on. One time I stuck my head in La Estrella and the only people in the whole place were 4 deshabilled looking dudes. Presidents day weekend I hit Hacienda just to see if the girls were as bad as you said. It was not to bad but I didn't stay long. I must add that we were fortunate that neither one of us were there late Monday afternoon. My friend FM from TJA witnessed a body being carried out along with a large bloody machette. Preliminary reports were a shooting and stabbing involving some of Tijuana's off duty Policia. I'am still trying to findout more details.

[NDsg0911]

OK. Let me get this straight.

She wanted money up front, and planned to rip him off by not providing the services agreed upon, because she had an STD and it was all for *his* protection.

Poor Tom was just a benighted, ignorant fool for not realizing this. It took someone of your insight and perceptiveness to point this out, and for that we are all grateful.

I have nothing against these decent ladies. They do what they do to make a living and to provide enough for their family given their circumstances. They're smart enough to realize that their livelihood depends on their good steady customers. For that reason they have every reason NOT to kill the goose that brings them the golden eggs.

[SuperSteve]

Hey Hugo:

Sorry that we didn't meet up.

I was taken to a jail away from the Zona to a jail, and the inside was not pretty. I actually think the "judge" was probably just another Policia.

Just a pure and simple shakedown of a Gringo. I'm going to take a short time out from Tijuana, and plan on visiting my ladies at my KMP. I get better sessions from them anyway.

The sad part is the money that the hotels, mersero's, and ladies will lose from this. I was spending $500-$1, 000 per month in Tijuana, and have 30-50 men that joined me in the last two years. They also have spent much money. I will now not bring men into what I experienced. It just costs the working men / women for their $80 gain. I guess that all they care about was they got the $80.

I probably won't be back in Tijuana before I go to Pattaya in April. When I get back I will probably be in a better frame of mind.

I hope that all is well with you and yours.

[Baxter Slade]

Thanks for sharing your misfortune. It will make us all a little more aware of the coruption around us when in the Zona. I started carrying around a Sindicatura card in my passport. Not sure if during a search that they might come accross it and think twice about a shakedown. Out of curiosity did you see the judge at the station by the zona or did they haul you off to the main jail out.

On the highway. I visited both places last trip fortunately from the outside and I wouldn't have wanted no part of that main jail just standing on the outside you can hear whats going on in there.

I also believe I did spot you Saturday at Tropical and at CC in the wee hours. However both tiimes you were ocupado but one of these times we will meet up.

[Joe Arturo]

Let me break it down for you.

The girl knew she had some kind of STD and she wanted to minimize its spread. She needed to take the money up front so she could deal with you more effectively. Her thinking was that once she got the money she would refuse you the actual sexual act to avoid spreading it to you. Since you refused to give her the money she had no choice but to go along with the sexual act. However she had the decency to hold on to the condom NOT for her dear life but for YOURS!

So you think that HK has girls working there without health cards and HK doesn't care if they get shut down when the random health card check happens every week. Wow! I guess you think that HK management are a bunch of idiots!

[Dcell75]

I did nothing to anyone. As a matter of fact, I was just chilling for the last 2-3hours waiting to head back home, and hadn't spoken to any one. I do not know who it was in the car, but I had never seen her before, and she didn't look like a working girl.

I walked down to the corner and got in a white cab. They pulled us over immediately. I don't think the cab driver was in on it, but who knows.

It was a pure and simple shake down, although they did not take all my money, which surprised me.

I had always felt very comfortable in Tijuana, I think now I will be going to my KMP more often now to session.

That's an eye opening experience. I have been asked by the cops there a couple of times to put my belongings on the hood while they look through my passport but luckily never picking me up on a bogus charge. I am so used to walking through the Zona alone that I forgot how corrupt that place can be. Your ordeal will definitively keep me on my toes as I stroll through the zona. I'm glad you made it home and thanks for the heads up.

[Phordphan]

Let me break it down for you.

The girl knew she had some kind of STD and she wanted to minimize its spread. She needed to take the money up front so she could deal with you more effectively. Her thinking was that once she got the money she would refuse you the actual sexual act to avoid spreading it to you. Since you refused to give her the money she had no choice but to go along with the sexual act. However she had the decency to hold on to the condom NOT for her dear life but for YOURS!

OK. Let me get this straight.

She wanted money up front, and planned to rip him off by not providing the services agreed upon, because she had an STD and it was all for *his* protection.

Poor Tom was just a benighted, ignorant fool for not realizing this. It took someone of your insight and perceptiveness to point this out, and for that we are all grateful.

[Coolie High]

TomJackin,

My friend WTF is wrong with you? You smashin meth head chicas now. Your nutz LMAO! As usual I'm enjoying your reports. Do me a favor though stay away from the meth head girls. Even though you were strapped with a condom you do NOT want the gift that keeps on giving.

[NDsg0911]

Hong Kong:

After scoring my favorite booth, I looked for my favorite girl, but she was bouncing off of some dude's lap. So I decided to tap into my HK bucket list, but none of those girls seemed to be around either. I settled on having a drink with my old friend, Carolina. She is always happy to show off the new twins. She decided to scold me for being such a HK butterfly; but it was all in fun. After she left, I scanned the place for my favorite, but she was now bouncing off some other dude's lap, good for her, at least she is making some money.

I just settled in and enjoyed the view. It wasn't long before the "Floater" drifted by with a beer in her hand. Candy, real name Karen, always has a beer in her hand and I wondered where in the hell does she get the beers from. It's like she has a case somewhere and pops one open as needed. It wasn't even 5 yet, and the girl was already tanked. I checked my HK bucket list, yep, she is on it, have a seat sweetie!

She is great fun in the booth. She pulled aside her panties and top so could play with the goodies at will. Hell, at one point my hand cramped up and I took a break, but she put my hand right back in place. She started tugging at the little sailor and the booth seemed to get warmer as time went on. OK baby, you now have my full attention, let's start the negotiations. She said,"Baby, you are my friend, $60." I told her I did not have any US cash, and told her I would give her 600 pesos. She gave me a cute confused look and said,"It's the same." Nope, she will not be entering the accounting field any time soon.

The girl had me so worked up, I had trouble walking to the room. After we stripped down to bare metal and laid down, she asked me for the money upfront. I told her,"You have known me for over a year and you said I was your friend, so what the fuck?" She asked again. I decided to go with a different approach. I replied,"Shut the fuck up and sit on my face now!" I guess she had a military background, because she followed the order well. When we did fuck, she was "condom slip off" paranoid. She held on to the base of the condom like her life depended on it. Bottom line; she is a lot more fun in the booth!

Tropical:

I always like stopping in there for a couple of drinks. I caught the "girls strip on stage for one song and then walk around with the announcer for tips" act. And for my dollar, I'm getting some flesh and at least, at the very least, sucking on one nipple! I think Tropical has some fine women; but they are always busy. I guess one needs to make reservations in advance.

Adelita:

I was planning on stopping in there for a drink, instead of making my usual stroll though, but there were 6-7 women on the stage line dancing so some country song and that was enough for me to get the fuck out of there. WTF Adelita?

La Hacienda:

Never been in there, but for some reason I decided to stop in and check out the place. I sat at a bar stool at the end of the bar, by the baños. The place was pretty much empty, except for me and bunch of really big women. This one big one was coming my way. Hell man, she looked like the michelin tire man's sister and I'm sure she was pushing 250 to 275 pounds and was on her way to meet me; oh joy! As she waddled her way over, she appeared to get bigger. She waddled up and said, Como estas, one cerveza for me? And I said,"That's it? That's your game plan?" I went directly into the counseling mode. I said,"Because of your size and your four chins, you need a better game plan. Try smiling, try touching my dick, try anything besides what you just tried on me!" She waddled away peacefully.

While I was counseling michelin tire man's sister, I felt a pinch on my side and as this thing walked away from me, I thought she looked pretty bad, and I only saw the back of her. Once she saw that the other girl was gone, I guess she thought it was her turn. When she was approaching, I kept telling myself,"Avoid eye contact, avoid eye contact at all costs." But it was like a terrible car wreck; I had to see for myself, and damnit I made eye contact! She was about 40-50 pounds less than the last one, but she was hideous to say the least. Her mouth was all crooked and shit; not sure what happened. Her game plan was a bit better than the last girl; but not by much. She also left thirsty.

What I did like about the place was the music and the drink prices. That was up until the "car wreck" decided she was going to dance on the pole. Good lord, please tell me this women would not remove any clothing items! Then things really went to shit. They played an Elton John song as this "car wreck" removed her clothes! Is there no mercy in this fucking bar. Thank goodness I had an empty stomach! I think I went blind in one eye, and the other was blurred.

I had to heal my eyes, so I returned to HK for an hour before I headed back to San Diego.

Let me break it down for you.

The girl knew she had some kind of STD and she wanted to minimize its spread. She needed to take the money up front so she could deal with you more effectively. Her thinking was that once she got the money she would refuse you the actual sexual act to avoid spreading it to you. Since you refused to give her the money she had no choice but to go along with the sexual act. However she had the decency to hold on to the condom NOT for her dear life but for YOURS!

[NDsg0911]

Hong Kong:

After scoring my favorite booth, I looked for my favorite girl, but she was bouncing off of some dude's lap. So I decided to tap into my HK bucket list, but none of those girls seemed to be around either. I settled on having a drink with my old friend, Carolina. She is always happy to show off the new twins. She decided to scold me for being such a HK butterfly; but it was all in fun. After she left, I scanned the place for my favorite, but she was now bouncing off some other dude's lap, good for her, at least she is making some money.

I just settled in and enjoyed the view. It wasn't long before the "Floater" drifted by with a beer in her hand. Candy, real name Karen, always has a beer in her hand and I wondered where in the hell does she get the beers from. It's like she has a case somewhere and pops one open as needed. It wasn't even 5 yet, and the girl was already tanked. I checked my HK bucket list, yep, she is on it, have a seat sweetie!

She is great fun in the booth. She pulled aside her panties and top so could play with the goodies at will. Hell, at one point my hand cramped up and I took a break, but she put my hand right back in place. She started tugging at the little sailor and the booth seemed to get warmer as time went on. OK baby, you now have my full attention, let's start the negotiations. She said,"Baby, you are my friend, $60." I told her I did not have any US cash, and told her I would give her 600 pesos. She gave me a cute confused look and said,"It's the same." Nope, she will not be entering the accounting field any time soon.

The girl had me so worked up, I had trouble walking to the room. After we stripped down to bare metal and laid down, she asked me for the money upfront. I told her,"You have known me for over a year and you said I was your friend, so what the fuck?" She asked again. I decided to go with a different approach. I replied,"Shut the fuck up and sit on my face now!" I guess she had a military background, because she followed the order well. When we did fuck, she was "condom slip off" paranoid. She held on to the base of the condom like her life depended on it. Bottom line; she is a lot more fun in the booth!

Tropical:

I always like stopping in there for a couple of drinks. I caught the "girls strip on stage for one song and then walk around with the announcer for tips" act. And for my dollar, I'm getting some flesh and at least, at the very least, sucking on one nipple! I think Tropical has some fine women; but they are always busy. I guess one needs to make reservations in advance.

Adelita:

I was planning on stopping in there for a drink, instead of making my usual stroll though, but there were 6-7 women on the stage line dancing so some country song and that was enough for me to get the fuck out of there. WTF Adelita?

La Hacienda:

Never been in there, but for some reason I decided to stop in and check out the place. I sat at a bar stool at the end of the bar, by the baños. The place was pretty much empty, except for me and bunch of really big women. This one big one was coming my way. Hell man, she looked like the michelin tire man's sister and I'm sure she was pushing 250 to 275 pounds and was on her way to meet me; oh joy! As she waddled her way over, she appeared to get bigger. She waddled up and said, Como estas, one cerveza for me? And I said,"That's it? That's your game plan?" I went directly into the counseling mode. I said,"Because of your size and your four chins, you need a better game plan. Try smiling, try touching my dick, try anything besides what you just tried on me!" She waddled away peacefully.

While I was counseling michelin tire man's sister, I felt a pinch on my side and as this thing walked away from me, I thought she looked pretty bad, and I only saw the back of her. Once she saw that the other girl was gone, I guess she thought it was her turn. When she was approaching, I kept telling myself,"Avoid eye contact, avoid eye contact at all costs." But it was like a terrible car wreck; I had to see for myself, and damnit I made eye contact! She was about 40-50 pounds less than the last one, but she was hideous to say the least. Her mouth was all crooked and shit; not sure what happened. Her game plan was a bit better than the last girl; but not by much. She also left thirsty.

What I did like about the place was the music and the drink prices. That was up until the "car wreck" decided she was going to dance on the pole. Good lord, please tell me this women would not remove any clothing items! Then things really went to shit. They played an Elton John song as this "car wreck" removed her clothes! Is there no mercy in this fucking bar. Thank goodness I had an empty stomach! I think I went blind in one eye, and the other was blurred.

I had to heal my eyes, so I returned to HK for an hour before I headed back to San Diego.

Let me break it down for you.

The girl knew she had some kind of STD and she wanted to minimize its spread. She needed to take the money up front so she could deal with you more effectively. Her thinking was that once she got the money she would refuse you the actual sexual act to avoid spreading it to you. Since you refused to give her the money she had no choice but to go along with the sexual act. However she had the decency to hold on to the condom NOT for her dear life but for YOURS!

[TomJackin]

After parking at the Duty Free lot, I went shopping for some necessary adult beverages. I was told I was allowed to bring 3 bottles across, so I bought 3 bottles, one bottle of Corralejo (Blanco) for $18 for myself, and a couple of bottles of Baileys, which were on sale for 2 for $29, for one of my favorites. In between the turnstiles, I was told that I had to push that silly button to get either the green or red light to get searched or not; I got the green light. But then the military dudes called me over for a search. I said,"Dudes! I got the damn green light, what the hell?" They didn't search very hard, and I joked with them the whole time; no big deal.

Stayed at the Ticuan as usual. One note about the place. They run a credit card, but it is not for room or bar service goodies, it is in case of room damage or if the remote for the TV comes up missing. If you want to charge stuff to the room, you have to create an account with your credit card with a specific amount on it. Then at check out, you can either leave it on the card or pay in cash for the amount charged.

For whatever reason, HK was quite packed in the late afternoon; maybe the holiday weekend had something to do with it. On my way from HK to the taco stand, I heard my name and it was one of my favorite HK girls getting out of a cab. She just came from the doctor and explained that she fell down and banged up one of her knees. She also said she wasn't working, so I asked why she was in the Zona and she told me that she lives in the HK hotel. So together, we ruled out sex positions. No doggy, check, no cowgirl, check. I asked,"Baby, does it hurt to lay on your back with your legs in the air?" She laughed and said no. We made a lunch date for Saturday.

My friends, Sid and his wife, picked me up at the arch and we headed out to a couple of bars in the La Mesa area. I call them my parents, even though they are not much older than me. Mainly because they scold me when I do stupid shit, which seems more often than not. But before they picked me up, I was standing around with my thumb up my ass, when I heard these dudes calling me from that strip club that is next to hotel Nelson. They were telling about the hot girls in the club and I yelled back,"Bring a couple out for me to see!" And they did, and they looked decent, at least from a distance. So I felt obligated to have a drink in the joint. There were a couple of cuties in the place. I sat at the bar and was not hassled whatsoever. Did not check on prices though; my bad.

After my parents dropped my off at the hotel, one of my favorites was already waiting for me. Imagine that, a woman being on time! After spending a few hours playing, it was off to work for her. And this was the time where I should have called it a night. For whatever reason it might be, I just don't have the damn sense to call it a night. Headed back to HK. At that point, it was wall to wall hombres! At one point while fighting my way through the crowd, I could not see any women. I decided to run through some of the other clubs. Most of them were packed so I walked the alley for a bit and searched for some downright nastiness.

I was walking towards the Chicago club and that's when I met "the one" in the doorway of the hotel. I finally met the cover girl for the "Meth Hoe" magazine. I thought, could I, would I, and then had a "What the fuck" moment. She wanted $20 for an hour, and I countered with 150 pesos, she agreed, and off we went like a happy couple! I quickly noticed that she was missing a few teeth and then when she striped down, I noticed she was missing her left nipple too! She asked if I wanted the lights off and I said,"Hell no baby! I have to see what I just got myself into!" She actually performed like a champ and she was a tad charming, in her own hideous way. I know, I'll seek therapy next week.

I figured I did enough damage for one day and started walking back to the hotel. On my way down Revolution Ave, I had a decent looking woman call me over for a chat. She asked where I was going and said she wanted to join me at the hotel for $50. I said,"Baby, if you had any idea of who and what I just got done fucking, you would surely change your mind!" I chatted to her for a couple of minutes and I think she knew I was an easy target because of the stench of tequila and the Meth Hoe. I knew it was somewhat of a setup because her last offer was five bucks for an hour. I moved along.

On Saturday, my parents came by the hotel and we were drinking in the bar when the broken HK girl showed up, and on time, what a concept. I asked her what kind of food did she want to eat and carne it was. Sid suggested the Rodeo in La Mesa and off the 4 of us went. I was really impressed with that place. I told the HK sweetie that it was her day, and to pig out as necessary, and she did. The soup was great, but then I was told it was possum soup, oh well, it was still great nevertheless. Mom and Pop dropped us off at the hotel and the HK sweetie showed her gratitude for the next couple of hours in the room.

I met up with 5RB (from TJA) in the evening at HK. I'm never there on Saturday evenings, but I thought there was a great lineup of women. There was fine gal with even a finer ass dancing on the bar, so I had my trusted night mesero, Johnny, go grab her. Pretty gal, hot ass, but she would not drop below $80. I played with her ass for a bit and then she moved on. I asked RB if he was ready to leave his comfort zone out of Zona Norte, and he said he was up for it; off we went to La Estrella club!

First off, all the clubs in that area were hopping, and it all seemed to be with locals. Once in La Estrella, we took a stroll around because not only was I checking out the women, I was also looking for the Gringo, the "Fat Fred Astaire." He usually hangs out there on Saturday night. Did not see him, so we went to the bar where the bartended pretended we didn't exist. RB goes outside for a smoke, and all of the sudden I hear,"What, are you fucking lost again?" It was the Gringo. He said,"I over there with three chicks, a little help please." I said,"Don't worry, Daddy Pesos is on the way!" I grabbed RB and we reported for duty!

There was a smaller gal, cute and full of life, I put dibs on her! And after I whipped out the pesos for a big bucket of beers, she was all over my happy ass. Now RB did not get the best end of this tour of duty, but the girl told me,"Me gusta tu amigo." But either way it seemed to work out. It wasn't more than a few minutes later when I looked over and he had a lip lock on her while playing with her tits. Thus we were all happy campers. And the big buckets of beer kept coming.

The club has seats that surround the tables and dance area. And sitting next to us was a couple of women that kept looking over at me. Every now and then, I would hand them a beer from the bucket. Both big, but they seemed nice. My girl went to the bathroom, and the younger of the two big women saw her chance and asked me to dance; and I did. That woman would not let my ass off that dance floor. She had a super glue grip on me and was not about to let loose; she quickly became my "Plan B." I finally pried loose and was reunited with my girl, who seemed really happy about my return.

The girls were trashed and we were having a blast. The girls kept knocking over their beers, it was like drinking with the Keystone Cops! But one of the highlights of the night is when I looked over at RB's girl and she was trying to gnaw off a bottle top with her teeth. I about pissed my pants because I was laughing so hard. The irony was there was a bottle opener less than a arm's reach of her on the wooden post next to her silly ass head. I wanted to say,"Give me that damn bottle before you hurt yourself," but I was laughing too hard to utter a single word.

RB asked if I was going to head back to the Zona, and I said,"Hell no, I'm taking "what's her name" back to the hotel." The only thing that I knew about this girl was that she was a pistol in the club and she had a bad habit of knocking over beers. I had no idea she was a proctologist until she flipped me over in the bed and started giving me a prostate exam with her tongue, she was an ass tonguing freak. After a couple of hours of playing with her, I asked for her hand in marriage, but she turned me down. As she was leaving and she was fully dressed, she dropped to her knees for a goodbye licking; I'm truly in love.

The border agent asked me what I was bring back from Tijuana and I replied with a big fucking grin,"A half bottle of Tequila and some damn good memories!"

[Ath Trainer]

I agree that wandering around the city at 6 AM is not a good idea. I had been sitting in Adelitas for a few hours waiting until 6 AM so I could catch the trolley back to Amtrak. The ladies know me well enought in there, especially at that hour, and no lady even approached me.

I had just walked out the door and immediately got into a white cab. They lit us up prior to Constitucion, and pulled us over just after. I actually think they had to be waiting outside Adelitas for anyone to come out, especially by themselves. I was just the unfortunate one who was at the wrong place at the wrong time. I wrongly figured if I just walked out the door, and got in a cab, I would be okay A very wrong guess.

Health & happiness to all.

You would have been better off walking back to the border, LOL. The street thugs would have been asleep by then. Only the real thieves in the cars with the lights on them are up at that hour. Nothing like a little southern hospitality to encourage an out of towner to come back and spend their $.

[SuperSteve]

I agree that wandering around the city at 6 AM is not a good idea. I had been sitting in Adelitas for a few hours waiting until 6 AM so I could catch the trolley back to Amtrak. The ladies know me well enought in there, especially at that hour, and no lady even approached me.

I had just walked out the door and immediately got into a white cab. They lit us up prior to Constitucion, and pulled us over just after. I actually think they had to be waiting outside Adelitas for anyone to come out, especially by themselves. I was just the unfortunate one who was at the wrong place at the wrong time. I wrongly figured if I just walked out the door, and got in a cab, I would be okay A very wrong guess.

Health & happiness to all.

[Artisttyp]

Damn Steve, why in the hell are you hanging out that late.

I agree with tom. Being around the zona at 6am is a bad idea. To be out at that time you need to be loaded or getting into trouble. Either way it is a great time to shake people down. Here in NYC you read stories about shootings and fights that happen on Sunday AM around the same time. People are all drugged up or patience levels are sporadic due to being up all night.

Glad you got through it ok SS. That is a total buzzkill.

[Phordphan]

I asked to see "the camera" (is what they said) , and I was told that I would have to stay in jail until tomorrow, or I could post a bail of $1, 000 pesos. The most amazing party was my "bail" was much less than I had in cash. I can assure you that the Tijuana jail that I saw was not a place that I wanted to be for 5 minutes.

I had decided to stay up all night, and not get a hotel. I was just sitting in Adelitas for about2-3 hours. I didn't even talk to anyone. At 6 AM I was on the way to the border. I think that they marked me before I even got in the cab while walking from Adelitas to the corner.

That really sucks! And, yes, your were targeted. The part that really bothers me is how elaborate their scheme was. A phoney judge and assorted BS. The weird part is that they only wanted 1,000MXN.

Here's a link, which may be helpful. The Tijuana Sindicatura tend to take this shit seriously. It's easy to fill out. You should, and then let us know what happens, one way or another.

http://www.sindicatura.gob.mx/complaints/index.asp