FKK Finca Erotica - Dierdorf

[FernandoAlonso]

Went there Eastern, horrible time finding it, somehow had programmed Industriegebiet, well it is not there but surprisingly centrally located in Diersdorf. Parking was so full I wanted to return immediately, but hell, I was already there. Shower is under construction, so shower with the ladies, actually quite funny seeing them all getting ready for the next gig or desparetely phoning with boyfriend or whoever.

I was tokld 25 girls but that seems a rather optimistic count to me, more like 15 and only a few stunners, mostly Eastern Europeans and a German bombshell, later more on this.

Showers are ok, someone wrote they did too little water in too short time, not confirmed. Enough water for me.

Many many punters sitting around, a few of the lesser attractive SPs doing agressive marketing, but all really civilised and a look away or a friendly I will think about it is signal enough. Even though it is kinda strange some girls are more interested in the videogames than their work, but anyway, everybody deserves a break.

Was there about 4 hours and even though that was partly boring, watching the scene was worth the entry, almost, you get some reasonable food and soft drinks too.

The girls, had two, Vanessa, Bulgarian, killer ass and nice rest of body, acted like a porn superstar but too much acting, technique soso. DFK, BBBJ and mish and finish. If they shout too much and too artifical I must laugh, she did not like this.

Nicole, Romanian is quite the opposite, very GFE and service oriented, much better attitude and worked hard for her money so I stayed for a full hour and did not regret one second. a bit chubby but really in the job, close to my favourite filipinas!

And last the blond bombshell, well she was always busy, no wonder with that looks, so she remains a dream, next time!

FA

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[Marlow]

I'm telling this because I think it's a hoot as they say in Texas.
I heard the story from Nina.

A regular is the seven minute man. He chooses a girl and goes off to the room, strips, lays his chronometer on the mattress and announced he is ready. His watch beebs every seven minutes at which point he changes position.

So his sessions go like this, seven minutes oral, beep! seven minutes missionary, beep! seven minutes, doggy, beep!

There's stuff you couldn't make up.

[Banaanovich]

I found Eva a tall blonde Bulgarian dressed as a nurse.

I believe this is Natalya's friend. If you were with Eva at the bar around 11-11.30 pm, we almost met. This was when I met Natalya, prompted by someone who could be Eva, dressed as a nurse and sitting with a guy who I thought might be anglo.

I stayed longer than I usually do at a club - four hours - which means I had a good time. I don't find FKK clubs worth more than five hours tops. I start wanting to do other things with my evening other than constant FKK club sex. If you have been to a sex party with other couples in a private house you will know what I mean.

I don´t believe I have. Sounds good though

[Marlow]

@Banaanovich -
Well, yes, you did miss the orgy. The small room beside the stage was packed with men and in the middle literally lying on a bed of c=%&cks was one pretty busy lady taken every which way.

The party was good, better than the previous one when the power failed. I spent time talking to Jeannette the red headed Czech who wasn't too keen to be there as she wasn't feeling too good. Jeannette for those who might visit has tuned boobs, tattoos and a firm body. She is not easy to get to know but under that cool exterior smoulders a siren woman willing to do whatever you want (at a price).

I found Eva a tall blonde Bulgarian dressed as a nurse. She is very playfull and flirtly, usually a sign that it's all show and no go, but because Eva was giving me the most ham acting come on and making fun of the whole over earnest FKK pick up lines, we went to a room together.

Eva turned out to be surprisingly good. Nothing beats a pussy that is tight and hot and I don't mean 'hot' metaphorically.

The other surprise was another blonde, about 1,62, a bit toothy with a schoolgirl vamp look in her eyes. When a girl comes on to me my answer is usually no, but again - party night maybe - off we went to one of the better rooms, the one next to the massage area.

She said she loved sex and proceeded to prove it with a deep throat, some slippery foreplay between her breasts, deep kisses, and orgasm urging hip pounding.

I stayed longer than I usually do at a club - four hours - which means I had a good time. I don't find FKK clubs worth more than five hours tops. I start wanting to do other things with my evening other than constant FKK club sex. If you have been to a sex party with other couples in a private house you will know what I mean.

[Banaanovich]

I think she took a long break, or at least was absent from Finca. She was nowhere to be seen the last couple of times I was there in the autumn. Maybe our forum-colleague Marlow knows more. But at any rate, definitely good news, yes.

Natalya is working Thursday-Sunday 11 am to 2 am. She plans to go to Japan for a few weeks in spring, probably April, to visit a friend and ex-colleague, but will be back again after that.

this club divides opinions like no other, except for Palace. I guess it ultimately depends on the line-up on the day, and your luck at selection. But it's a nice set-up for a long stay.

True, I was there again on Saturday. Still enjoyed the premises very much, but line-up was not that impressive. Natalya was, though. I spent around 5 hours with her, sessioning 90 + 90 minutes, with more talk than sex.

Is it non-smoking throughout now? Last time the only place you could smoke was indeed the reading area, which resultant fug made it not so pleasant.

During the party Thursday, it was smoking thoughout, Saturday smoking allowed in the reading room and some of the private rooms. Cigarette breaks on Saturday did bring me in contact with Cissi (not sure about spelling), Germany, early to late twenties, with whom I later had spectacular session. Cissi had been extremely busy all night, out-zimmering even Natalya, but when I finally managed to book a session just before closing time, it was well worth the wait, sexwise maybe the best of my holiday, even though Natalya, Erika (Bernd's) and even Annette (Oase) would also be on the podium.

Cissi is a classy, easygoing, very friendly, very flirty girl-next-door with certain porn-star qualities (a new live combination for Banaanovich). Limited English, but her German is clear and quite easy to understand. Full throttle GFE, no hurry before or after despite her popularity among the gents. I have tried searching this forum with different spelling versions of her name, but come up with nothing. She looks to be 20-25, but has the style and selfassuredness of someone much older. Very natural look, discreet make-up. Curly, dark blond hair. About 1, 65. B+-tits. A non-permanent tattoo with her family name on lower back. Light acne on forehead.

She works irregularly, but presently Tuesdays, Fridays and either Saturdays or Sundays. Highly recommended.

[Capt Dan]

Captain Dan http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...postcount=1485 among others, you had better stop reading now, cause I have a feeling this is going to end up as a pretty pathetic posting. However, a few porno clips will be provided (search “Vicky” and/or “Celina” to get there).

Buddy,

I did not notice any opera singing or prostitute poetry in your scribbling. So all good!

CD

[Toscana]

So, this marvellous Natalya is still in Dierdorf. This is the right time to visit Finca, then, this summer time.

I think she took a long break, or at least was absent from Finca. She was nowhere to be seen the last couple of times I was there in the autumn. Maybe our forum-colleague Marlow knows more. But at any rate, definitely good news, yes.

Thanks for the report, Banaanovich. I was wondering what your take would be, as this club divides opinions like no other, except for Palace. I guess it ultimately depends on the line-up on the day, and your luck at selection. But it's a nice set-up for a long stay.

Is it non-smoking throughout now? Last time the only place you could smoke was indeed the reading area, which resultant fug made it not so pleasant.

[Creature2]

Captain Dan http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...postcount=1485 among others, you had better stop reading now, cause I have a feeling this is going to end up as a pretty pathetic posting. However, a few porno clips will be provided (search “Vicky” and/or “Celina” to get there).

Natalia/Natalya/Nathalia. Russia/Bulgaria. 30.

Now, in order to keep this posting to a minimum, I will settle for linking to the expert opinions of Toscana http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...lia#post863724 as well as Creature2 http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...0&postcount=70, with whom I heartily agree.

I sessioned Natalya for first half an hour+. Followed by a break, while she was taking care of a 42, I then sessioned her for an hour+ and then another hour+. Sex was great. While she enjoys oral, she does indeed come much more easily during vaginal sex. GFE times 100. And she seemed perfectly happy with whatever I came up with until I requested another session 4 minutes before closing time at 4 pm.

So, this marvellous Natalya is still in Dierdorf. This is the right time to visit Finca, then, this summer time.
Thanks for that interesting report, Banaanovich

[Banaanovich]

Captain Dan http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...postcount=1485 among others, you had better stop reading now, cause I have a feeling this is going to end up as a pretty pathetic posting. However, a few porno clips will be provided (search “Vicky” and/or “Celina” to get there).

It is now Friday 4 pm Koblenz time, and it will be a while before this report reaches the public, as I am not only moderated, but also a slow and longwinded writer these days. Furthermore, I am tired and somewhat unfocused after hardly having slept at my address for the night, Hotel Ibis at 45 euro for check-in at 6 pm and check-out 32 hours later. Thoughts of last night are whirling round in my head, and writing just might be the therapy I need.

When I left you, I had just had my debut at Bernd’s (http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...postcount=1501) and was settling for a quiet day, if the carnival in Cologne can be considered as such. I was going to FKK Finca Erotica, which had not only advertised a carnival party with gangbanging (not my thing, I believe, but I would love to watch), but also in its services section was promising zeitschriften. Would these be Newsweek or perhaps “Trim your garden in 30 days”? I could hardly wait for the answer, but - drained as I was from the day before - I expected to stay only for a few hours after having found out.

My GPS would not recognize a street address called Poststrasse 20, 56269 Dierdorf, but brought me close enough to detect an elegant, Roman inspired building with a number of cars parked outside. It was just after 9 pm. Seeing the no-smoking sign onthe door, I almost turned around and left, but I rang the bell and was buzzed inside, where the otherwise curt thekenfrau assured me that the ban did not apply for special parties such as tonight.

Having departed with the 50 euro entrance fee and being handed a waist-towel of extraordinary size and quality (not least compared to Bernd’s), I headed for the changing room only to remember that Frau Theken had asked for my shoe size (45). I must have forgotten to bring them from the reception. Not so, she explained irritably, I would find them in my locker. Now that seems to me the height of creative thinking, placing guests with similar shoe sizes next to each other, thus giving us a natural thread of conversation. When I scored big and found a size 46 in my locker, I was very happy with my neighbours, and there was indeed a lot of large feet both leaving, arriving and settling bills at that particular time.

Of more concern were the small lockers, meaning that again I had to cramp my winter coat, clothes and bag together, and the apparent lack of deposit boxes with solid locks. In this respect I am probably mistaken, because there were indeed a number of boxes looking like just that, but my key did not fit, and I did not have the nerve for another visit to the front desk. Yes, I ought to have asked my fellow 46ers, but one does not want to appear ignorant and/or signal that one has any significant valuables in case those safe-deposit-like-boxes turns out to be for example for staff only or something completely unimaginable, does one?

Time for the showers, and if those were left a lot to desire at Oase and Bernd’s, this was ridiculous. Dierdorf should not have to shoulder the burden of reversing the climate changes on its own. Hot water, yes, but in spurts of 3 to 4 seconds after each push of the button.


Having developed a tennis elbow trying a complete a sporadic body and hair cleansing, I went to look for the magazines. As much as I wanted to focus on the task at hand, I couldn’t help notice a substantial number of ladies, some dressed up as if rehearsing for a 70ies American porno flick, some in what I understand to be traditional dessous clothing and a few covered with nothing more than their piercings and tattoos. And a little less substantial number of gents, whose contribution to the carnival was those exquisite white waist-towels. Despite having brought from Cologne (where anything less would single you out as a bloody tourist) my newly acquired, 10 euro, green, yellow, black and purple joker hat with little golden bells at the tentacles, at the last moment I had decided against wearing it, trying instead to blend in with the 46ers.

I also seemed to notice at the corner of my eye that most of the ladies were very much doable. And that the layout and elegance of the Finca Erotica were diminishing anything previously experienced by Banaanovich in the FKK department (Artemis, Oase and Bernd’s). And I simply had to stop at the large buffet, where to my surprise the food (tapas, chilli con carne, lots of vegetables) actually looked rather inviting, almost making me regret having stopped at Burger King on the way and forgetting to make them cancel the onion rings.

But finally I arrived at my destination, a smaller room with, hooray, magazines lying on the table. And newspapers on a rack as well. I spotted an issue of “Bild für Damen” or something like that, but annoyingly, my further investigations were hampered by the presence of several ladies performing manual and in one case oral deeds on some 46ers. Polite as I tend to be, I could not bring it over myself to step over them even for the sake of this esteemed forum, and I thought there would be plenty of time to come back later.

Another couple of magazines, as well as a gentleman reading what I believe to be one of the local newspapers, were found in a relax room with a few lounge chairs and a Jacuzzi. A great sign indeed, as I missed a good place to hide under a book or newspaper between sessions at both Oase and Bernd’s.

Having a break in my truth-seeking mission, I absently noticed a stage with a pole and near this pole a fine looking young lady with a hair colour slightly too pink and a bust slightly too firm to look like something explained by Darwin alone. Vicky, I believe was the name I heard mentioned through a loudspeaker. She was dressed at first, but took of one layer after the other, helped in particular by a far less the 46er. Possibly it was also his bottle (of what from my position, not the very best, looked like beer) she suddenly had in her hand. She drank a little, proceeded to sprinkle some over her nether frontal opening, drank some more and stuck same bottle into same opening. Then she gave the bottle to less that 46er and motioned for him to stick it up her opening again, which he hesitantly did. She needed to prompt him further in order to get him to move it rapidly in and out before giving him back the bottle, with far less beer in it than at the outset. Banaanovich sr. has not seen anything remotely like this since Pat Pong 1987, and Banaanovich jr. remembers being a little more impressed back then.

When Vicky started looking around for new volunteers, I – belonging to the shy species – retreated further and as if by providence stumbled upon a staircase leading slightly upwards. On the lookout for another possible oasis for my reading to come, I was happy to find a kino. It must have being showing porn, but what I recall now is the emptiness at this particular time. Just as I went back to try and locate Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung, a good looking young lady appeared and introduced herself as Annabel, Russia. As readers of Russian poetry will remember, this is a classic Russian name appearing in any number of works from Pushkin to Dostoevsky, and for me Annabel provided a chance to further polish my Russian, as today’s edition of Komsomolskaya Pravda might not be available due to the carnival.

I suggested she give me an introduction to the premises, I had far from seen it all, and without any hesitation, she recommended the nearest couch, opposite a sleepy looking 42. BBBJ and fingering followed, but after a while she suggested the kino as a more proper venue. Annabel is dark blond, long hair, good body, natural C breasts, nice face, GFE’ish and a sexy, raspy voice – the latter, however, only due to the fact that her dog (I was a bit confused as to whether this was her Boxer or another dog, breed unknown to me, that she was just temporarily tending to) had escaped in a park in Frankfurt, resulting in her yelling for hours. Normally she speaks like Mickey Mouse, she explained. Russian, German and some English (languages, not sexual positions). We engaged in a lengthy 69, which she enjoyed without climaxing, while I was too deeply buried to register the whereabouts of my climax. 50 euro demanded and well deserved. Repeat? I thought so.

Finally ready for Corriere de la Serra, I went to the relax room, but was distracted again, now with the porno moment making Banaanovich jr.’s day. In the Jacuzzi was, besides an estimated 46 and 43, difficult to estimate because of the bubbles, an extraordinarily nicely naturally shaped female in her early 20ies. Leaving The Miami Herald for later, I decided to join them, sat myself next to the slyly smiling fox and struck up a conversation. As she told me, Celina is from Dusseldorf and study to be a social worker. Just when I began complimenting myself for explaining in nearly comprehensible German that FKK must be the true call for a social worker, she replied that she did not work here, but had only come as a dancer for the party (her second at Finca). I expressed my regret that I had only seen her colleague Vicky (she did not seem to recognize the name, maybe I had misheard) dancing her native folk dance on the stage, but that I would definitely be there for Celinas next dance, when would that be? Sorry, no more shows tonight, the three scheduled ones having been at 5 pm, 8 pm and 10 pm. Verdammt, she must have been on stage while I was occupied in the kino. My consternation grew when a definite 49, and in this particular case not only talking shoes, appeared with his member at an angle close to a perfect 90 degrees and sat down opposite Celina in the Jacuzzi. Without a word, she swam over to him and mounted him, rocking him gently for 10-15 minutes while asking him (as far as I could extrapolate) whether he wanted to go somewhere private. Whatever her proposition was, he declined, and after a while I asked if he was part of the show as well, which he confirmed. Because of the bubbles, I could not really see what was going on, but interesting it was. Now, I may be a newbie, but I am fairly certain that jerking off in the Jacuzzi is not standard FKK etiquette, and anyway, after too short a while the couple rose from the Jacuzzi, me eyeing briefly her full body for the first time, including a huge tattoo along her side and a piercing slightly south-southeast of her clitoris (from her perspective).

Even more intriguing was the story I was told later by what I believe to be a highly reliable source: The 8 pm show consisted of a girl, seemingly Celina, giving hand-, blow- and possibly further jobs to 30-40 guests, regardless of shoe size. After that, the seeming Celina was being pounded in all possible openings by a male looking just like 49. However, while I have full faith in my source, my reporting on this is second and to some extent third hand, and eye witness accounts should always be treated with care, especially when the experience takes place under duress (just look at myself, was it south-southeast, southeast or even south-southwest? from whose perspective? and was that tattoo a dragon or what?), so corroboration would be needed. Please, enter Basketcase.

I am not at liberty to reveal my source, but it leads to the part where I will hear no complaints, this is my second warning to avoid this post if not romantically inclined regarding P4P.

Staggering to the bar for a Coca-Cola with extra sugar added, no ice please, I found myself beside a nurse in proper white, including her panties. She was, however, already giving first aid to a 46 who spoke German almost as poorly as I and with a possibly English accent (music to loud to get any definite bearings). In came a police officer in proper black, not including her somehow lost panties, and a small, but mean-looking water-pistol, possibly a calibre .84.

My first reaction was “bad teeth”. My second reaction was “kinda cute though”. My third reaction was a jump of joy, when she introduced herself with a name I remembered from this thread.

Natalia/Natalya/Nathalia. Russia/Bulgaria. 30.

Now, in order to keep this posting to a minimum, I will settle for linking to the expert opinions of Toscana http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...lia#post863724 as well as Creature2 http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...0&postcount=70, with whom I heartily agree.

I sessioned Natalya for first half an hour+. Followed by a break, while she was taking care of a 42, I then sessioned her for an hour+ and then another hour+. Sex was great. While she enjoys oral, she does indeed come much more easily during vaginal sex. GFE times 100. And she seemed perfectly happy with whatever I came up with until I requested another session 4 minutes before closing time at 4 pm. Not to be misunderstood: I do not do anal, P4P without condom, any rough stuff nor even bestiality, and somewhat uncharacteristically for Banaanovich, everything happened in two of the top class rooms, not in public. We spoke Russian, but I believe her German is proficient and she has some English, not to mention Bulgarian, some Chechen-Ingush and a few phrases of Japanese.

However pleased Banaanovich jr., Banaanovich sr. was the one really gleaming. Natalya is one of the most fascinating human beings I have ever talked to, and I meet quite a lot of very different people in my professional life. Sir Angus, a tip to you from one of your many fans: Natalya should be granted a chapter in what I hope will be your future book, possibly as the heroine. But hurry up or I will get there first, and the initial editions will not be published in any language near you.

Yes, I am in love, and no, I have no plans to take Natalya away from you all. Just treat her well and session her often. She usually works Thursday to Sunday.

Thanks to Myrmidon, Toscana, Weyfarere, Angus Magee and Gfe Finder for your kind words and to everyone in the forum for your postings, without which this happy holiday would not have been possible. I do not expect to post more in the foreseeable future, thus saving considerable broadband, as I will not be visiting Germany anytime soon, and because the places where I may or may not monger have ISG-forums where I dislike the general tone.

But who knows, should I get horny later in the evening and hook up with a drug addicted, 70 year old, Vietnamese street hooker, wherever she might be found in Koblenz, you will be the first to know.

If not, Friday will be my day off, but I hope to enjoy my next to final day in Germany, Saturday 13 February, at a certain FKK Finca Erotica. Should any fellow mongerers wish to hook up, I would be glad. To my knowledge, I have never met another ISG member.

I can not be PM’ed (apologies to Jackson, dues will be settled), but look out for the tall, blond, big-nosed, red-eared, small-penised fellow, shoe-size 45 or hopefully upgraded to 46, reading Neue Kölner Handelsblatt and at the same time desperately trying to block access to Natalya, if ever so temporarily.

Happy mongering.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I would suggest that the author or another Forum Member consider posting a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please Click Here for more information.

[Angus Magee]

I was at Oase the second weekend of November and was aghast to find my view of the young ladies for rent obscured by workmen (whose time could have been put to much better use cleaning the joint) putting up the cheesiest of Christmas displays.

They have to put the decorations up early so they can get good & filthy by the time Christmerchandisingmas arrives.

[Angus Magee]

My favourite way to describe 'em. No body sells any thing. They just do short term leases or rentals. LOL Know any on Rent Control?

Best keep this quiet. They might start asking for damage deposit. :-0

[Myrmidon]

I was at Oase the second weekend of November and was aghast to find my view of the young ladies for rent obscured by workmen (whose time could have been put to much better use cleaning the joint) putting up the cheesiest of Christmas displays.

My favourite way to describe 'em. No body sells any thing. They just do short term leases or rentals. LOL Know any on Rent Control?

[Regnad]

This was the highlight of the Xmas party.

Must confess that I'm glad to see that the good old US of A isn't the only place that fetishizes Christmas aka The Festival of Merchandise by moving its start ever more rapidly toward August.

I was at Oase the second weekend of November and was aghast to find my view of the young ladies for rent obscured by workmen (whose time could have been put to much better use cleaning the joint) putting up the cheesiest of Christmas displays.

[Marlow]

@Angus -
I hope you managed to have some filly put a fine polish on it!

[Angus Magee]

As James Bond might have said she was 'shaken but not stirred'.

Great report Marlow. Gave me preliminary wood....