Dating Regular Girls

[Jelly Donut]

Interesting reading.

I'd second (or third) Sporadic's "infatuation" comment. Trying to drag out one night of pleasure with a sex worker into a lifetime partnership is a bit crazy. Why can't you just enjoy it and let it go?

Some additional conventional ideas:

* You should not have gone bareback with her. It's probably not a problem in this case, but you should get tested.
* Don't assume you can "save" her. The amount of time you are committing here is vast - learning Russian, flying to Arabia. Remember that while you have only experienced a situation like this once, she is in a position to have similar experiences all the time.
* Even if you could make her an "honest woman", there are some things in this situation out of your control, things you can not redeem and not play hero in. For instance, in future, how will you explain to any children that their mother was a sex worker?
* Read Of Human Bondage by Somerset Maugham. There is a solid, if brief, description in that book of how quickly an innocent girl can be transformed into a hard and indifferent sex worker. Also, it might help you think about your own motivation in this affair.
* If you are set on falling in love, I recommend trying out a dating agency in Russia instead of chasing this girl.

Also, if you can answer Boofer's question I would appreciate that...

thanks,

J.D.

[Disappointed]

The leaving her work part is the least of it, she would IMHO be more than happy to leave her work (as would 99% of ladies) but you have to get to the root cause, is she supporting a child/family in Russia? She is not in Dubai for vacation.

Totally agree. Most are here for a reason - make money. It could be she is supporting a family, kids or Husband even.

Additionally, there are some exceptional actors in Dubai in the mix with the genuine nice ladies. I remember one crying her eyes out about her family in need in some state near Russia, only to find out she told different stories to others!

So your call, but if you are looking to make this truely happen - Your nuts!. JMHO

[Disappointed]

Buddy,

what's the name of the club for the Turks and Lebanese babes???

cheers

Damn that made me chuckle. You could have at least started with "Your Nuts!".

But to answer your question, i think its referring to Braodway, where the girls look Lebanese and Turk. They are usually Central Euros.

[Rover4220]

These girls are picked up by the arab sheiks with a promise of marriage. they get married , bring them to middle east then take their visas and passports away.
Once they are done with them they pass them on to madams

I was at Iraq with UNDP and saw many European ladies who wer brought to Iraq as wives and dumped.

The girls have no place to go , no passports , no documents and just for survival they agree to whoring. They were not *****s to begin with really.

I never enjoyed fucking any one of them but always gave 50USD which was a huge amount--enough to survive for more than a month in Iraq.

So check that out. The places they r caught up in are worse than our indian brothels

[Boofer]

Buddy,

what's the name of the club for the Turks and Lebanese babes???

cheers

[Orient Longman]

A happy and successful marriage needs to be based on a lot of factors, including sex. You will realize in time that sex is not the most important factor in a happy marriage.

You might have "made love" to her multiple times on your first meeting, but trust me, unfortunately that kind of passion does not last more than a couple of years.

Here are some questions you need to answer honestly:

1) What do you know about her as a person ?
2) Do you know what she expects from life ?
3) Do you know what her aims and ambitions are and how would you fit in ?
4) Marriage is an institution that demands sacrifice and adjustments from both partners. Do you know if BOTH of you have the emotional maturity to make it a success ?

My guess is that since you haven't been able to verbally communicate with her, you don't know the answers to the above questions.

Being familiar with Indian culture, I can predict with some certainty that approval from you family will be a problem. Are you willing to risk breaking family ties forever for a girl you know nothing about (other than that she is fantastic in bed when she is emotionally vulnerable) ?

I have been in similar situations where I felt a deep connection with a innocent looking newbie working girl which resulted in fantastic sex. This has happened on multiple occasions with different girls that spoke the same language that I did (so there was no communication barrier as in your case). Over time I have learned that what I felt was NOT love. It was a temporary infatuation or obsession that lost some intensity with each passing encounter and eventually fizzled out.

My only advise to you... move on buddy, this is not for you.

[Member #1263]

Hey Buddy..just Keep On Banging Her When You Can!! Leave The Emotion Bit Out...otherwise She Would Be Banging Someone Else Pretty Soon...caoi

[Nice Guy 99]

Marry her. I could write a couple thousand words ... but just marry her.

[Country Counter]

Do what you need to do to fall out of love. You know what the correct thing to do is, don't fall in love with a prostitute. This girl is in a foreign land and will latch on to a nice guy like you, maybe you get her to the UK, then her family comes and you get left. You know she doesn't love you, otherwise you wouldn't wonder if she would go to India with you. Imagine all the guys she's slept with since you've left, hopefully that will help you to move on because that's what you need to do.

[Sporadic]

My questions:

1) Surely what I felt was love and not just sex based on a financial transaction. Did M too really did feel the same for me? or was she just giving a good Girl-friend-experience (GFE)?

I suggest infatuation. Personally, I do enjoy getting to know the ladies, not just renting a vagina, this does have a downside though, that of getting "too close." It is like fire, it can warm you or burn you.
If the situation is, as you describe (her in town only a few days) it is likely you were the first "decent," "gentle" guy she has met. Under her extreme circumstances, I have no doubt she really appreciated your kindness. Love? Could be I suppose, stranger things have happened, but from experience, I suggest it was the circumstances.

2) Why did M not call me yet? Im sure it would be difficult for her to make a call withought her mamasan's knowledge given that she can barely speak any local language. Even if she calls, wot is she gonna say besides the three common words between us (Pashimu, Shto and Kak). Is that the reason why she didnt call?

She does not have a phone of her own, and I doubt the Mamasan wants to pay for a halting, four word call to the UK. She is not ignoring you, she has issues (privacy, money) that probably stop her from calling you right now.

3) If I ask her to come with me, will she say yes? I dunno why she left her country and agreed to put herself through this. It was ofcourse for money, but how badly does she need the money. can't she come with me and make a decent living elsewhere? Will she trust me enough to do so?

Impossible to judge at this point. I suggest you take a deep breath and let things settle a little. Yes, she needs money, how much might surprise you, life is tough in provincial Russia.

4) If she does decide to come with me, how easy or difficult it woudl be for her to do so? I know that her passport is kept with mamasan and she only carries a photocopy. I did ask her if she would get back her passport if she wants to go home to russia, and she said Yes. Will she really get it back or she doesnt konw her mamansan too well (she's been in Dubai only for 7 days)

hard to say, obviously she will need her passport to do anything, sometimes the PP is safe, in other cases it is sold on ot a "departing lady." Hard facts, I know, but what can you do?

5) AM I FUCKING NUTS TO FALL IN LOVE WITH M AND TO EXPECT HER TO LEAVE HER WORK AND TO COME WITH ME AND LOVE ME FOREVER?

In a word, yes. However, that does not mean you are crazy, just rushing things a bit. White Knight syndrome, you would love to "take her away from all this" and she may have the same fantasy. The leaving her work part is the least of it, she would IMHO be more than happy to leave her work (as would 99% of ladies) but you have to get to the root cause, is she supporting a child/family in Russia? She is not in Dubai for vacation.

I would be very grateful if the seasoned mongers share their experience with me. have any of them ever gone through this. What are my chances with M?

Ok, three times, I have found myself with serious "new" girls, who decided on the spot that I was something special. I am convinced it was because I was the first "nice" guy they had run into. I also had nothing to offer them long-term (I am not single) but that did not seem to sway them. Understand she is very, very vulnerable right now. Whatever you do, do not offer anything you are not prepared to back up with actions, that would be cruel. I do not want to sound trite, but I think your perspective will change after some time passes, as may her´s.

Final note, I find DXB unique in that you can meet ladies who are not yet hard and professional, and it is a real treat, but it can be a double edged sword, sometimes it is better NOT to know all the gory details of a girls life.

Try to take it easy, and if things work out, great! If not, you had a special human encounter. Lucky guy.

[Sammon]

One time or another I am sure all seasoned mongers have felt what you felt for the girl although many might deny it.
Now to the truth of the matter. It is quite natural for you to be bitten with the love bug. But in reality in the girl's point of view you are just another client in her life. You also said she went for a ST with somebody before you took her. Do net get all dreamy eyed and talking about marriage and such. There is a world of difference between you and her.
Take a word froim the mongers in this forum. A broken heart lasts as long as another shag. Maybe you are not an experienced monger and that is why you fall in love with some working girl so easily. In my opinion it is ok to continue the off and on meetings but to marry her you have to think real hard. I am sure pretty soon you will get over her. Otherwise you will get hurt real bad emotionally.
I am not saying working girls do not make a good wife. You will be the one constantly thinking how many guys she has been with and asking her questions etc. Take a deep breath and move along.

[Round the World]

Wow, interesting story and a great read. I don't know if I qualify as an experienced monger, but I say, what the hell. You only live once. You might as well take your chances and get your heart broken. Go out there and find out what life holds for you.

The experienced among us will tell you it doesn't look good and it won't end well. And the heavy odds are against it (and they really are).

But sometimes the heart break and the longing are better than a good shag anyway.

Go for it and keep posting the updates!

Best of luck mate,
RtW

[SinSoakedGuy]

I need the opinion of all the seasoned mongers here please!

I visited Dubai this week on a business trip. I've been visiting this forum for sometime now, and was eager to try some of the stuff mentioned here while I was in Dubai. During my stay I visited Astoria, the Lodge, York Internatinal and Regal and went with couple of girls which was all okay. However, on the last day I thought I needed somethng different so I went to another club on Tuesday evening. The club was full of Turkish/Lebanese girls (I think). Many of the girls approached me, but I was not to keen on trying something immediately. I spent couple of hours drinking and looking around. Finally I saw a very quiet and innocent-looking girl sitting with two or three another girls. She was not looking around hunting for customers unlike others. She seemed out of place there. I thought I would take her. However, before I could approach her, a couple of guys approached their table and took off with couple of the girls including the girl I mentioned (let's call her M for convenience). After M and her friend were gone, I approached the other girl who was sitting with her and asked her if she will be back. She replied, Yes, in an hour. So I told her I'll wait for her and to let me know if she's back.

I waited for more than an hour until she was finally back. In the meantime I was talking to her (Turkish) friend who told me that M was Romanian and she is very new here and couldn't speak english. She also gave took my number and told me that once I am done with M that night, i should call her the next day for some good time with her. When M finally arrived, her friend asked her where am I gonna take her. I told her I was living in Habtoor Grand (near Jebel Ali sailing club). She said she won't go so far as she is very new here and nervous about going out, so I needed to take a room within Broadway hotel. I told her I am not carrying my passport, so It's not possible. She spoke to M for a bit and then called up M's mamasan on the phone. I also tried convincing M's mamasan on the phone that it's a good 5 star hotel (not many people seem to know about the hotel) and I'm a decent person and will take care of her. FInally her friend and mamasan were convinced and asked M to go with me.

We set off for the hotel in the cab at about 2am. M couldn't speak any english at all. She looked very beautiful and innocent, but a bit worried at the same time. I tried explaining to her not to worry, and that she'll be safe, but it was a struggle since she barely understood english. I tried striking some kind of conversation but it was all in vain as she kept on saying sentences starting with 'Pashemu', 'Kak', 'Shto' etc. One thing I did manage to ask her was about her country and she seemed to understand that as she said 'Roosi' (Russia) contrary to what her friend had said (She said M was romanian). Even though I had come to broadway thinking of going with some Arab/Lebanese or turkish girl, I was not at all disappointed with M being russian, such was her beauty and demeanour.

When I reached the hotel, the first thing I did was switch on my laptop and start google's translation tool for translating English into Russian. I also opened another website which could be used to type russian letters for her to use (as my laptop didnt have cyrillic alphabets). Using these tools we started an immensely slow but enjoyable process of getting to know each other. She was impressed by my computer skills (she told she hadn't used it much before). I told her about what I do, and she told me about where she comes from (an industrial town in Russia). I typed the name of her town in Wikipedia and she immediately recognised the pictures of her town and and her eyes were filled with tears of longing. I asked her how long she been in dubai, and she replied she had been here only for 7 days! I asked if she missed her home, she replied yes! with a glimpse of tears in her eyes. I hugged her and tried to comfort her, and she felt okay. I also asked her if she was doing this out of her own will or she's been forced into this work.. she nodded her head and waved her hand as if she is saying '50-50'. I asked if she was hungry and she said, yes a bit, and she helped herself with some fruits kept on my table. She seemed much more relaxed now and was actually enjoying our conversation. I asked her if she was happy with the place and if she felt safe? she replied in the affirmative.

We conversed (barely speaking a word, using my laptop to translate english to russian and vice-versa) for about an hour. At about four in the morning, I told her that I was very sleepy and we prepared ourself for bed. I changed into my pyjamas and asked her to use the bathrobe as her evening gown. (No we didn't strip bare naked in the first moment as most girls and johns would do). We lied down on the bed looking at each other. I wanted to kiss her, but I was almost as nervous as if I was on my first date. I didn't feel at all that I was with a call-girl (I even hate using that word with regards to M).

Slowly, after lying down for a few mins i approached her and touched her lips with mine. she drew closer. We slowly started kissing and kissed for almost 15 mins. It was the most intense and sweetest kiss I had ever experienced. Things took off from there and we made love for almost next one hour. However, during the entire one hour, there was barely a minute when we were NOT kissing each other frentically and passionately. After we were exhausted, we still kept looking and smiling at each other. I kept running my fingers in her hair asking her to go to sleep. She kept teasing me with her abrupt kisses, playfully touching my tongue with hers, she said she couldnt sleep. At about 5.30 in the morning, M's mamasan called her up. I didn't want to let her go, so I told her I'll pay more and asked her to let M stay back until 12. Mamasan agreed (ofcourse why wouldnt she!) and spoke to M (in russian) to explain to her that she should take the money from me and stay back till 12.

After mamasan's call ended, we continued playfully kissing each other, making funny faces, nibbling each other's ears and cheeks. M would never stop abruptly kissing me and and biting my lips all these while. we made love once again, then ordered breakfast and then slept in each others arms. After about an hour or so, I woke up again and saw her sleeping besides me. I kissed her.. she slowly opened her sleepy eyes, looked at me lovingly and went to sleep again. I kept teasing her by kissing her all over her body.. and before we know we were in each other's arms and making love again. This time, i didnt even use a condom. I felt so close to her and no thought of STD ran through my mind. She didnt insist for a condom either (unlike in the first two sessions). Maybe even she had started to trust me. Finally it was around 11 and i realised its gonna be my last 1 hour with her as i was returning to London by the 4.15 evening flight. I told her that I was returning to London the same day, she looked a bit disappointed. I told her that I will definitely come back sometime and see her. She nodded her head. I asked her phone number (she said, she doesnt have a permanent phone number, she only gets a phone from her mamasan when she goes out for calls. I said dont worry, i'll find some way of finding her. I gave her my business card clearly marking my phone number and asked her to give me a call if she gets a number of her own. Remember, all these conversations were taking place through the translation tool on my laptop, allthough M did manage to teach me the meaning of few russian words (Pashemu=Why, kak=how, shto=what etc) in this short while. Finally, it was 11.45 and M stood up to get ready, but I grabbed her into bed again and we made love again until about 12.15 when she got worrid about her mamasan calling her.

At 12.30 I asked M to call up her mamasan and i spoke to her mamasan to get the directions and address for the cab as M could barely speak anything besides russian. I offered to take her outside the hotel and drop her in the cab and explain the address to the cab driver, however i couldnt drop her all the way to her house as I had to leave for airport in two hours and had still to do my packing and checkout. As we were preparing to leave, I held M in my arms for one last time and kissed her, and couldnt help saying her 'I love you'. She didnt understand it initally, so i had to translate that too. I kissed her again and said I love you. She responded by saying I love you.

When I went out to the hotel lobby to drop her in the cab, i didnt feel any shame unlike last night while bringing her to the hotel. There was no reason to be ashamed, she was not a call girl for me, she was someone I loved!. I roamed around with her, showing her the swimming pool. Called for the cab and sat with her in the lobby waiting for the cab. However, when the private cab arrived, i didnt wanna explain the directions to the hotel car driver as that would give away the reason M was in the hotel. I decided I would accompany her till Mall of the emirates where we would get off and get M into another cab to her home. In the cab, I held her hand in mine. I took my pen and wrote I (L) U on her hand. she smiled. We kept looking at each other fondly as well as with a hint of sadness knowing that we were about to part ways. I opened my wallet for a piece of paper and asked her to write her name in Russian, which she did. She also glimpsed my passport size photo in my wallet (which i keep for contingency). She took the pic from me and kept it in her purse. I took some photographs of her with my mobile phone camera. I kept pointing to her purse where she had kept my business card and made gestures with my hand reminding her to call me, she nodded in approval.

Finally we got down from the private taxi at the mall of the emirates. I pulled up another cab for M, explained the directions to the cabbie as per my conversation with M's mamasan and asked M to board the cab. My heart was very heavy by the thought of letting her go. As the cab slowly drove away, i kept looking at M with a heavy heart and a hint of tears in my eyes. She kept looking at me too as long as I was in sight. We couldnt say each other anything as I didn't have a laptop with me there to help me with the translation. But I guess our eyes pretty much gave away wot we wanted to say.

As I took the cab back to the hotel, I could barely stop tears flowing from my eyes. I could still feel the sensation on my lips from all the kisses from M. When I got back to the hotel, I again cried looking at the rustled bedsheets where I was lying down with M in my arms just an hour ago. I drank from the same glass in which M had left her drink unfinished that morning. I was getting late for my flight, so I quickly did my packing and checked out of the hotel. On my way to the airport, I passed by the mall of the emirates. Again tears filled my eyes thinking that was were I parted from M about an hour ago. Soon after, i slept in the cab as i had barely slept for an hour the past night. I woke up when i reached the airport. However, the feeling of longing would not leave my heart. I looked out at Dubai from the airport windows thinking this is where my M lives. I wanted to come back really soon, but I was wondering how! Incidentally, when I checked in for the flight I was informed that due to a flight change, there were limited business class seats available so if I volunteer to downgrade to economy, i would get a free business class return ticket from london to Dubai to be used anytime in next one year! I readily accepted to be downgraded with the thought that atleast the ticket are sorted out for my next trip to dubai to see M (I am not very rich, I work for a living, the business class fares and five star hotel stay are provided by the client).

Nevertheless, its been 3 days since I returned from Dubai after meeting my sweet M. On my flight back home from Dubai I had made up my mind that when i go back to Dubai again (soon) I will meet M, tell her that I love her, and ask her to leave that job, marry me and come to UK with me. However, the day I returned from Dubai, some redundancies were announced in my company and I am at risk of redundancy too. This means that i will have to leave the UK ( I was here on work permit) unless I land up another job. This throws a spanner to my plans. I would have to go back to India, but I dont know if M would be willing to come with me there. Incidentally, M's turkish friend called me the same evening I landed in London wanting to meet up. I informed her that I was already in London. Also, instead of talking about her, I asked her about M and if she was doing okay and asked her to convey my regards to M. I called her up again the next day and she informed me that M was well and was very happy to hear my message. I called her again today and asked her to tell M to call me up sometime if she can. I wonder how much M's friend will cooperate with me in helping me keep in touch with M.

In the meantime, i keep thinking of M most of my time when Im not looking at her pics on my mobile (and now copied onto my laptop)

There are also a few other decisions and questions that I am listing below.

My decisions:
1) I gave up mongering. I can't be part of a system that turns girls like M into a commodity which any men with a heavy wallet can buy. I will stick to this decision irrespective of whether or not I ever meet M again.


2) I will visit Dubai very soon, track down M, tell her how much I love her, and ask her to come with me. I will tell her that I am not a rich man, but I'll try to keep her happy. I will tell her that I may lose my job in UK and maybe get another in UK or in Europe or in the middleast (where I was working earlier) or even back to India (where things are not that bad as the economy is doing quite well and one can make a decent living). She can stay with me and Ill help her make a decent living doing a respectable job. She can even marry me when she is ready.

3) Ive already started to learn the russian language. Ive to master it as soon as I can.


My questions:

1) Surely what I felt was love and not just sex based on a financial transaction. Did M too really did feel the same for me? or was she just giving a good Girl-friend-experience (GFE)?

2) Why did M not call me yet? Im sure it would be difficult for her to make a call withought her mamasan's knowledge given that she can barely speak any local language. Even if she calls, wot is she gonna say besides the three common words between us (Pashimu, Shto and Kak). Is that the reason why she didnt call?

3) If I ask her to come with me, will she say yes? I dunno why she left her country and agreed to put herself through this. It was ofcourse for money, but how badly does she need the money. can't she come with me and make a decent living elsewhere? Will she trust me enough to do so?

4) If she does decide to come with me, how easy or difficult it woudl be for her to do so? I know that her passport is kept with mamasan and she only carries a photocopy. I did ask her if she would get back her passport if she wants to go home to russia, and she said Yes. Will she really get it back or she doesnt konw her mamansan too well (she's been in Dubai only for 7 days)

5) AM I FUCKING NUTS TO FALL IN LOVE WITH M AND TO EXPECT HER TO LEAVE HER WORK AND TO COME WITH ME AND LOVE ME FOREVER?

I would be very grateful if the seasoned mongers share their experience with me. have any of them ever gone through this. What are my chances with M?

Many thanks.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I certainly hope that the author or somebody else will post a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please Click Here for more information.