Non-Pro Garotas - Opinions & Advice

[Carlos Primeros]

Hi Stinky,

I had been once in a similar situation like you. The best thing to solve it is to have a very open word.
I told my Noiva that either we play it straight - and I am very very serious - or we better forget it. It took her 5 minutes to come around - I met here family (the real family) and we all still have until today a very good relation. Meanwhile my ex-Noiva is a dentist and I still see here when I come to Rio. (six to seven times a year for one or two weeks) The relation lasted for 6 years and we are still the very best friends. We only could not agree to live together in a fixed relation - she did not want to accept my "side-trips", which I did not want to give up. Otherwise I would have had the very best wife!

I wish you all the best - however it works out for you.

Carlos

[Golfinho]

Thanks. I had some absolutely amazing very happy-and-sad days. But I am not sure anyone should feel happy for me. I was a relatively happy married man and now I am doomed. If you take the girl with you in your heart, you have a hard problem to solve. I suppose it's easier to get rid of Gonorrhea than of the love-bug. If anyone here on the forum has some advice for me, I'd appreciate open discussion or a PM.

That's a fishy story you have going, Squid. Are you by any chance a member of a nationality these people might not be familiar with?

[Prosal]

Yes that is a mystery. Did she take a bus, may be. But she took a long time to reach home in one case. Actually she ended up not being able to pay. I picked up that tab after her attempt to pay failed.

Just she never wanted me to see her place.

Obviously she doesn't seem to be a "prime" target by Zona Sul (or Nuth) standarts. Rather a periferiada or a favelada.

I find that the poorer girls are often the worst if looking for serious relationships, as they are one-track mind gold-diggers. It's in their blood and called survival.

[Stinky Squid]

Correct me if I'm wrong. Nuth is a rather upscale club. I have never been there but from what I've read on the forum it costs a few more reais than I'm willing to pay just to enter the place. You say you met her there then you go on to add that you think she walks miles to meet you. Newsflash: With as many buses and vans that run around Brazil I have never know a Brazilian to walk miles. Maybe a few blocks, but not miles. She had enough money to go to Nuth, but not enough to take a bus?

Yes that is a mystery. Did she take a bus, may be. But she took a long time to reach home in one case. Actually she ended up not being able to pay. I picked up that tab after her attempt to pay failed. But it was just the right thing to do, I like to be chivalrous with the ladies, and that was one thing that ignited her flame, not because of greed but genuinely. The family or friends even called my cellphone to find out where she was. The phone situation is not rich with her either. I do think she needs to watch the budget. But yes, a bus could have worked too.

You met her mom but she won't let you meet the rest of the family? That seems odd. Seems more likely that you would meet cousins and friends in social situations when you are with a person. Example: She could have been with cousins at Nuth when you met her. Moms and dads you usually meet last when someone is sure about you. Yet you met the matriarch out of the starting block, but are shielded from meeting people in the family who hold less rank. That is fishy.

But I think it was true. The age difference between these two ladies was making it quite plausible. I think they are just good friends too, her and her mom. I also get to talk a sibling of hers once on the phone. They seem to be all in the loop on what's going on. I think she has a really nice family actually. Just she never wanted me to see her place. My theory is she lives in a bit of a crowded downtrodden place and is ashamed of that. This would fit her shyness and otherwise fine demeanor. She likes things nice and tidy and when they are not, she does not want to expose me to it. I try telling her that I enjoy to be everywhere she is and everything about her, but she is really cute in keeping these limits in some more intimate issues as well. Very cute.

Making lies. Well we know she is definitely hiding something. I wouldn't try to speculate on what it is though. I would say you are ahead of the game. You already [had a very intimate enjoyable time with] her a few times and you haven't spent much money on her. Still, if I was you I wouldn't get too wrapped up in her. She seems like the type that would disappear and cut you off in a heartbeat. It may not be about gold digging. You could just be an escape from her normal life, whatever that may be.

Yes, that is true, and in fact, that would be the best outcome, as sad as it would be. I just hope she'll be happy whatever she does. I am so grateful if I could have been of help to make her feel good a few times, because I was in paradise with her. I had a time of pure bliss that I will think about even on my deathbed 50 years later (or whenever).

[Prosal]

Nuth

Beware in Nuth. Missing up with the "wrong" girl there (as in any Zona Sul or Barra de Tijuca club like Baronetti, Sao Thome, Bombar, ect, ect) can lead to very serious trouble with berserk half-drunk steroidized Gracie jiu-jitsu gringo-hater pitboys (the majority of the male clientele in those places) delighted to have found a foolish foreigner to beat up.

Mongers who ponder about chasing skirts in regular "in" clubs in Rio better be extra-careful.

Those Carioca pitboys DON'T like gringos(to say the least). And they are filled with testosterone. And they HATE when sex-hungry gringos try to steal "their" prime women in "their" places. This old cliché drives them nuts. The last thing you want during your vacations in Rio is trouble with some local jeunesse doree violent pitboys.

Many young cariocas (vicious flatheads is not a Russian exclusiveness) are spiteful gringo-haters burros. And this is even more true in "redneck" Brasil like in Belo H or Goiania BTW.

[Stinky Squid]

Hi Guys, I appreciate so much your kind advice on my little problem with the love-bug. To give back in return and make it not all about me, I am telling you here a little about this Nuth place.

The location is at a corner of where the Av. das Americas crosses the canal on the east end of Barra. Av. Armando Lombardi, 999, Barra da Tijuca. It's marked in Google maps already, but I think the exact coordinates are -23.007033,-43.313733. Web site is http://www.nuth.com.br.

You probably start going there by 10pm or so and action ends at 4am. You get in showing your id (I carry a color copy of my passport, that was enough. Some can even get in without id just entering their data into computer.) You get a card for 2 drinks free. The cost was R$ 40 for males (not R$ 70 as someone else said, may be it depends on season) and R$ 30 for females. You pay as exit fee, so you can worry about that later. I am sure some girls go in knowing they won't have to pay because they can pick up someone who covers her tab.

Inside the ratio of male to female was almost skewed to the female side at first. A lot of them are cougars, but not bad at all. It does not seem to be a semi-pro pick-up joint, but I had limited exposure. I know just normal working people go there to have some fun. Later in the evening, the M/F ratio was slightly more on the M side, but still pretty even. The males were also not the youngest, so it's pretty much a middle-age type of place.

Music is whatever the typical dance club music is. Nothing special. The ambiente is alright. You can eat upstairs and there is one pool table, but who goes there to eat or play pool So you'll be most likely downstairs checking out the people and who is available trying to chat up. The dance floor is not big and gets crowded, but there are these somewhat separated seating groups where you sometimes find a bunch of girls together. The group next to where I danced with my mother daughter pair was actually not bad at all and I don't remember seeing them with many male visitors.

Drinks over the limit are only mildly expensive. One Smirnoff above your allowance costs you R$ 8 extra, for example. When you go out you pay your tab. Many locals pay with credit cards, so I think that this scare that your card numbers gets stolen everywhere in Brazil is actually no longer true.

I would not go to this place if I wanted a selection of young ladies who are just a quick pick up. Certainly not for pros. As usual, the pretty ones are often encircled by others and somewhat out of reach to the casual passer-by. And there aren't necessarily that many pretty ones. So this is not the place for a quick lay - and neither necessarily the place for true love, except in exceptional circumstances of course

[Member #3433]

I'm not saying she's a gold digger, but.

Correct me if I'm wrong. Nuth is a rather upscale club. I have never been there but from what I've read on the forum it costs a few more reais than I'm willing to pay just to enter the place. You say you met her there then you go on to add that you think she walks miles to meet you. Newsflash: With as many buses and vans that run around Brazil I have never know a Brazilian to walk miles. Maybe a few blocks, but not miles. She had enough money to go to Nuth, but not enough to take

Concur with Mr. E. I have been to Nuth MANY times, as recently as last month. I have met serveral girls there (Geez I love the fact Brasilians love to make out) ranging from spoiled rich 18 year olds to professional 30 somethings. Her telling you she is walking would throw a red flag. That club is very exspensive. What part of Rio does she live in? What part of Rio is her family from? Does she work? Do you have evidence that she has a job? How much experience to you have in Brasil? I am only guessing not much due that you stated the language barrier between you and her. No slam on you as I consider myself a newbie.

Dude. I am not trying to throw a wet blanket on your party, just be careful. I love Brasil, buying property there, and I love Brasilian women just as much as any other guy. Wish I would have discovered this place 10 years ago in my 20's. Be careful and take your time. I don't know how old you are but there are guys on this board rockin' Brasil that are twice my age. So there is no hurry. Brasil isn't going anywhere. Are you going back to see her anytime soon?

[Mr Enternational]

I met her at Nuth (described in some detail few messages ago).

What I know about her background is what she told me and I met her mom once.

She would never let me pick her up or bring her to where she lives with her family.

I think she walks for hours to meet me and to return.

She is making little lies about this but from what I see this is because she might be embarrassed about something or may be because of her acute issues with her previous relationship.

I'm not saying she's a gold digger, but....

Correct me if I'm wrong. Nuth is a rather upscale club. I have never been there but from what I've read on the forum it costs a few more reais than I'm willing to pay just to enter the place. You say you met her there then you go on to add that you think she walks miles to meet you. Newsflash: With as many buses and vans that run around Brazil I have never know a Brazilian to walk miles. Maybe a few blocks, but not miles. She had enough money to go to Nuth, but not enough to take a bus?

You met her mom but she won't let you meet the rest of the family? That seems odd. Seems more likely that you would meet cousins and friends in social situations when you are with a person. Example: She could have been with cousins at Nuth when you met her. Moms and dads you usually meet last when someone is sure about you. Yet you met the matriarch out of the starting block, but are shielded from meeting people in the family who hold less rank. That is fishy.

Making lies. Well we know she is definitely hiding something. I wouldn't try to speculate on what it is though. I would say you are ahead of the game. You already banged her a few times and you haven't spent much money on her. Still, if I was you I wouldn't get too wrapped up in her. She seems like the type that would disappear and cut you off in a heartbeat. It may not be about gold digging. You could just be an escape from her normal life, whatever that may be.

[Jan 156]

fwiw Brasilian girls I'd say aren't just good actresses - although that is true - many actually live the part and believe in it with almost religious fervour. There are girls who knowingly rack up a few husbands who keep them in comfortable alimony. Some might have done it with that intention, some might have simply 'realised' that their life was going that way. But there's also girls who have made devoted partners.

Admittedly they are probably streets ahead of most countries culturally when it comes to emotional negotiations, but whether they also have a good heart and the personality to settle down is another matter and one that can only be determined really on a case by case basis.

I've said for years now that if I ever settle down again it will most likely be with a Brasilain woman.

Things I would I think ask myself if in a situation as close to that described as I have come across and can imagine -

I look a few years ahead, quite analytically and unemotionally - can I realistically visualise both she and I successfully adapting to whichever country we decide to live in. Will out mutual social, financial and standard-of-living goals be reasonably satisfied (they might seem irrelevant in the first flush of love but are very relevant to its continuance). Are we sufficiently accepting / able to integrate each other's religious beliefs. Then I also think from my own cultural perspective. I like a woman who has her own life even if she is living with me, can earn a living, even if it is different financially to my own. But not all men think like this and a great number of women don't. So can our basic ideas about gender roles work harmoniously. If there is an age difference, will that be a problem on a personal or social level for either of us in the future, even if it isn't now. If we have a relationship now that is not and never has had an element of programma, how will I feel if I find out if there is that in her past (or anything else that I might react to). Crucially, if we make long term plans but are likely to be apart for a period while they are getting finalised, am I going to be distraught if I discover that she has been unfaithful (either pdp or affairs) while I have left her on her own.

The Brasilian attitude to relationships and fidelity is quite special - probably more similar to France than anywhere else I can think of but without the pretence of laisser-faire. It is normal for the large proportion of Brasilians to have an affair on the side, even when they are deeply committed to their partners and family. The rule is, no-one is supposed to ever find out (when they do, histrionics are the order of the day). One is expected to 'believe' the lie (if it is a lie) that one's partner is not like every other man/woman, that he/she would never have an affair, that they are the paragon of moral uprightness. Not only believe it, but make a public hue and cry about how special they are. The rule is based on what you know. Not what you vaguely imagine. (American culture is far more into imagining what might be - in Brasil, your public image is 'reality').

Now I know girls that have moved away from Brasil and adopted the relationship rules of the country they move to and really are very happily married by Western standards as well. But there are so many that find their sexual/social/whatever needs are not met and decide maybe then to play the damn game 'cos he deserved it' lol.

Good luck!

[Fred100]

Hi Perkele, I would be so glad if you could convince me I'm being played. Then I could make a decision and move on.

I met her at Nuth (described in some detail few messages ago).

I communicate with her by listening to her talking (much and I enjoy it so much just listening to her.) She talks on for hours about her problems, about her child, teaches me her language, asks me words in my languages, complements me, speaks about how much she appreciates me, teaches me the names of the fruits she feeds me, you name any expression of joy love and intimacy, she does it to me. To me conversing with her is totally effortless because we can laugh and forget time by mostly her talking and I get the gist of what she says. She hardly asks questions that would stop the conversation, she keeps things flowing. I can talk with her by stringing some words together which she helps me get right, or by typing into Google translate. Usually I just look at her and listen, and after 4 hours like that we start cuddling I caress her while she goes on talking about how good she feels with me and more sweet things. Now that we are in different parts of the world, we will be emailing and I can ask a bit more detailed questions and understand her answers in better accuracy. But even her written words are from out of this world yet naturally delivered in simplicity.

What I know about her background is what she told me and I met her mom once. She just came out of some relationship stress of her own, and that's still going on. So she often compares how good she feels with me with that prior experience. I'm afraid to give too much detail as it might identify her to someone who knows the story. But suffice it to say that time could now make certain things clearer. May be she has so many problems of her own that her being in love with me is some sort of passing strong feeling by which she gets over her emotional problems. So at some point then her feelings should subside.

There is a good bit of her background that is still somewhat obscure to me. She would never let me pick her up or bring her to where she lives with her family. I have begged her to send me an address so I can pick her up. I think she walks for hours to meet me and to return. She is making little lies about this but from what I see this is because she might be embarrassed about something or may be because of her acute issues with her previous relationship.

How I know she is not a gold digger? 1. she never talks about money or things she likes to get, 2. she walks for miles to our meetings and doesn't let me chauffeur her in a taxi, 3. she never asked me for anything, 4. she seems honest and shy just very natural, has none of the gorgeous-girl attitude. 5. her tears about our meeting and separation in light of her own issues seem sincere. 6. she talks about God and truth and encourages me to go home to my family and be happy while she will be content with loving me from afar.

If hers is a scheme, it is extremely well played. And involves a lot of freebies for me without any reward to her. I had 2 incredible encounters with her 12 and 16 hours of pure bliss for me. I felt like I was in paradise, at the fountain of heavenly love itself that is filling my whole being body and soul. She is so pretty that she would have an easy time to find herself a sugar daddy if she wanted to. I am no sugar daddy and what she sees from me does not show her any above-average indication that I would become one. So if her love for me so beautifully expressed in words and deeds would not be sincere, her only game could be that she believes I will throw away my marriage (for which she has no indication that I would) then after I would marry her (which she can trust I would in an instant if I was free) she might turn around and make my life a hell and end up with an alimony or something. But that is such a remote reward for her in my case, that I just can't believe she would play such a cool game. If she was cool, she could play a game with better odds on someone else.

One thing I am still considering is her emotional/psychological baggage that makes her be so sincere now but might not last. I am analyzing the heck out of this trying to find a fault in her. It makes me feel so bad to seek a blemish in her as she appears to me as such a lovely being in body and soul. The only reason I even discuss her here is that I don't know with whom else I could speak about the trouble I am in?

Man I love her so much, I feel so 100% fulfilled and happy and blissful with her. I can be just myself and she expresses such wonderful love to me it is from out of this world. I would never even think about leaving my wife for something so-so, you guys are my witnesses. Have I not failed in every mongering activity? Have I not always ended up trolling here that I felt my wife-sex was the best sex? But now the pure heavenly joy I received from this girl - even without completing sex for me with her - is just so overwhelming I can not think how I could give that up. I just hope (and fear) that it may somehow end itself. I would be the happiest man in the world just for these 2 meetings with her in paradise. But if she does not stop giving me these feelings, I don't know what to do.

Hi SS,

I think you could be up for a bit of an emotional beating on this one. I do hope not, but these girls are very very good at what they do. Been there many times. Once they think they have you spellbound. That is when the tragic life emergencies will start. These emergencies will undoubtedly require financial help from you. I personally invent stories of my own and always lie about how long I am going to be there. Then send a message or call from the airport about an emergency of my own that I have to deal with (try and leave before the hit). I always calculate what I would have spent for an honest pro over the time, half it and make sure that she gets that money(bearing in mind this is ten times what she would get from a job). This is not the place to go looking for love. It can happen, but from what you have posted I would say this is not the case. I know it can be difficult to stand back and look at yourself and your situation. To me it sounds like a classic case of growing a dick on the forehead, can't see the truth when your testicles are hanging in your eyes. Try and remember real people don't work so hard to tell you what they think you want to hear.

[Stinky Squid]

Stinky Squid. Before we go any further I'd like you to answer a few questions. Where did you meet the girl? How do you communicate? What do you know of her background? Why am I asking. Well brasilian working girls are best actresses in the world. I have feeling that you're being played. Of course I can be wrong but I doubt.

Hi Perkele, I would be so glad if you could convince me I'm being played. Then I could make a decision and move on.

I met her at Nuth (described in some detail few messages ago).

I communicate with her by listening to her talking (much and I enjoy it so much just listening to her.) She talks on for hours about her problems, about her child, teaches me her language, asks me words in my languages, complements me, speaks about how much she appreciates me, teaches me the names of the fruits she feeds me, you name any expression of joy love and intimacy, she does it to me. To me conversing with her is totally effortless because we can laugh and forget time by mostly her talking and I get the gist of what she says. She hardly asks questions that would stop the conversation, she keeps things flowing. I can talk with her by stringing some words together which she helps me get right, or by typing into Google translate. Usually I just look at her and listen, and after 4 hours like that we start cuddling I caress her while she goes on talking about how good she feels with me and more sweet things. Now that we are in different parts of the world, we will be emailing and I can ask a bit more detailed questions and understand her answers in better accuracy. But even her written words are from out of this world yet naturally delivered in simplicity.

What I know about her background is what she told me and I met her mom once. She just came out of some relationship stress of her own, and that's still going on. So she often compares how good she feels with me with that prior experience. I'm afraid to give too much detail as it might identify her to someone who knows the story. But suffice it to say that time could now make certain things clearer. May be she has so many problems of her own that her being in love with me is some sort of passing strong feeling by which she gets over her emotional problems. So at some point then her feelings should subside.

There is a good bit of her background that is still somewhat obscure to me. She would never let me pick her up or bring her to where she lives with her family. I have begged her to send me an address so I can pick her up. I think she walks for hours to meet me and to return. She is making little lies about this but from what I see this is because she might be embarrassed about something or may be because of her acute issues with her previous relationship.

How I know she is not a gold digger? 1. she never talks about money or things she likes to get, 2. she walks for miles to our meetings and doesn't let me chauffeur her in a taxi, 3. she never asked me for anything, 4. she seems honest and shy just very natural, has none of the gorgeous-girl attitude. 5. her tears about our meeting and separation in light of her own issues seem sincere. 6. she talks about God and truth and encourages me to go home to my family and be happy while she will be content with loving me from afar.

If hers is a scheme, it is extremely well played. And involves a lot of freebies for me without any reward to her. I had 2 incredible encounters with her 12 and 16 hours of pure bliss for me. I felt like I was in paradise, at the fountain of heavenly love itself that is filling my whole being body and soul. She is so pretty that she would have an easy time to find herself a sugar daddy if she wanted to. I am no sugar daddy and what she sees from me does not show her any above-average indication that I would become one. So if her love for me so beautifully expressed in words and deeds would not be sincere, her only game could be that she believes I will throw away my marriage (for which she has no indication that I would) then after I would marry her (which she can trust I would in an instant if I was free) she might turn around and make my life a hell and end up with an alimony or something. But that is such a remote reward for her in my case, that I just can't believe she would play such a cool game. If she was cool, she could play a game with better odds on someone else.

One thing I am still considering is her emotional/psychological baggage that makes her be so sincere now but might not last. I am analyzing the heck out of this trying to find a fault in her. It makes me feel so bad to seek a blemish in her as she appears to me as such a lovely being in body and soul. The only reason I even discuss her here is that I don't know with whom else I could speak about the trouble I am in?

Man I love her so much, I feel so 100% fulfilled and happy and blissful with her. I can be just myself and she expresses such wonderful love to me it is from out of this world. I would never even think about leaving my wife for something so-so, you guys are my witnesses. Have I not failed in every mongering activity? Have I not always ended up trolling here that I felt my wife-sex was the best sex? But now the pure heavenly joy I received from this girl - even without completing sex for me with her - is just so overwhelming I can not think how I could give that up. I just hope (and fear) that it may somehow end itself. I would be the happiest man in the world just for these 2 meetings with her in paradise. But if she does not stop giving me these feelings, I don't know what to do.

[Perkele]

Stinky Squid. Before we go any further I'd like you to answer a few questions. Where did you meet the girl? How do you communicate? What do you know of her background? Why am I asking. Well brasilian working girls are best actresses in the world. I have feeling that you're being played. Of course I can be wrong but I doubt.

[Stinky Squid]

Stinky Squid. Good luck! I feel very happy for you. There is nothing like true love. Go for it!
B.B.

Thanks. I had some absolutely amazing very happy-and-sad days. But I am not sure anyone should feel happy for me. I was a relatively happy married man and now I am doomed. If you take the girl with you in your heart, you have a hard problem to solve. I suppose it's easier to get rid of Gonorrhea than of the love-bug. If anyone here on the forum has some advice for me, I'd appreciate open discussion or a PM.

[Bimbo Boy]

Guys, I seriously doubted her, I was 100 % set for having a fall-out with a gold digger. But could not have been any more wrong! The girl I met is not only the cutest one ever seen on the face of the earth, she is also the most humble and pure soul and the most fun to be with. The rest of this subject does not belong on this site any more.

My point is only: you can strike lucky here, but hell you better be prepared to be a good man when you do. I really pride myself that she ended up with me, probably the greatest sucker of this site when it comes to mongering. Man I can't bear the thought of any random monger breaking her pure heart while taking advantage of her.

Stinky Squid. Good luck! I feel very happy for you. There is nothing like true love. Go for it!
B.B.

[Stinky Squid]

Guys, I seriously doubted her, I was 100 % set for having a fall-out with a gold digger. But could not have been any more wrong! The girl I met is not only the cutest one ever seen on the face of the earth, she is also the most humble and pure soul and the most fun to be with. The rest of this subject does not belong on this site any more.

My point is only: you can strike lucky here, but hell you better be prepared to be a good man when you do. I really pride myself that she ended up with me, probably the greatest sucker of this site when it comes to mongering. Man I can't bear the thought of any random monger breaking her pure heart while taking advantage of her.