Russian Women - Opinions and Advice

[Jake993]

Of course I realise there is no standard recipe for everything, but it is worth some thought and discussion in my opinion, as it does get us thinking about what they're thinking and feeling.

Thoughts fellas?

Skank,
You bring up a REALLY good topic which is very timely for me personally as I am in the process of courting a 20 something Muscovite lass of good position and breeding. Why? Good question - but let's table that for a moment.

It has been my experience that Russian women have one of the most finely turned bullshit detector systems out there when it comes to false compliments. Unlike other cultures where false praise is expected to be heaped on women like so much manure, Slavic women tend to be more skeptical of praise from men..... especially ones who are trying to get into their pants. For example, you might casually greet a good looking woman acquaintance or colleague by saying, "Hi gorgeous". Try that with a Russian woman and except for the firs time, it will likely be met with a slight cock of the head a slight squint. You know darn well that she's thinking, "OK - what does this pecker head want now?" Try that with a Brazilian woman, and whether it's the first time or the hundred and first time you say it, it's always met with a little twitter and a flirtatious giggle. The Latinas love it.

However, when you offer a carefully considered complement about a Russian woman's inner self, or her a whole (including her drop dead gorgeous body) the response seems to be much more emotional. I agree with you, I don't think Russian women are accustomed to getting sincere compliments from Russian men. It's not a bad thing it's just not in the culture.

For example, I was dating a beautiful blond Muscovite about a year ago. Late 30's, investment banker, smart as a whip, body like a dancer. Could treat the whole world like shit if she wanted to but when it came to waiters, waitresses at Coffee House, the guy collecting tickets at the theater, store clerks, the babushka at the metro begging for money, etc she had a very kind and gentle way about her that made people "beam" when she interacted with them. She was one of these people who would just stick out and shine in a crowd. One night during "pillow talk" I mentioned to her (can't remember the exact words) what a beautiful person I thought she was - not just from her physical appearance but her as a complete person and I told her why I thought so. To my surprise she broke down in tears and told me that was the most wonderful thing anyone had ever said to her and proceeded to screw my brains out. But I digress...... although I was quite sincere in my comment, I really was not prepared for that reaction and it told me something about her and Russian women in general.

Again, try that with the Latinas, and will get the same curious stare that you get when trying to explain quantum physics to your dog. They hear the words but it just does not compute.

Now, this carefully considered praise can have unintended consequences. As we have discussed ad nauseum, Russian women have a whole different attitude to sex and casual relationships than the ones we grew up with in this repressed sex prison we call "the West". BUT - when you dare to cross the emotional threshold, you can get yourself into a whole lot more than what you bargained for. While I have no first hand experience with this myself, I understand that if you get a Russian girl into a relationship that progresses beyond casual sex and then break up with her, you had best be prepared for Armageddon. The old saying about "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned***", was probably coined when dealing with a bad breakup with a Russian chick. Pots and pans - cleavers and knives - daggers and axes - it will get very messy if you choose to sever a relationship with a girl with whom you have taken a voyage with the "B" word. Consider yourself warned.

*** Most people think this phrase was coined by William Shakespeare. In fact, it actually comes from a play called the "The Mourning Bride" (1697) by William Congreve. The complete quote is "Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned / Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned."

My 2 kopecs worth....

[Doctor_Skank]

I recently wrote a regular girlfriend that she was something like "super, wonderful, beautiful, loving, sexy, beautiful, passionate, fun, adventurous and wild." Moments later I got back a big mail that 'no one had ever told her such words and she was crying with joy'.

Huh?

I was a bit surprised, as she is the kind of girl I'd expect gets compliments all the time. At the same time, I have often heard from girls that Russian men are terrible about making compliments, preferring to "not spoil" their girls. I am certain there is some cultural value to what they are saying long-term, but it does open the door for us free-tongued foreigners.

Nonetheless, going too early with the "you are beautiful" could come off cheap and slimy.

What are your guys thoughts on using the "b" word, and subsequent compliments?

1) when should it be used?

2) what immediate effect does it have? (positive and negative)

3) what long-term effects can it have? (positive and negative)

Of course I realise there is no standard recipe for everything, but it is worth some thought and discussion in my opinion, as it does get us thinking about what they're thinking and feeling.

Thoughts fellas?

[Jake993]

Pelmini3 must be one of the most surreal shots I've seen for a while. Is it art, or is it just tasty pelmini?

Just good investigative photo journalism.

[Piper1]

Glad you do Dr. S.
Let me illustrate my point for those who don't quite get the finer points of Slavic cooking.
Bon appetite.....

Pelmini3 must be one of the most surreal shots I've seen for a while. Is it art, or is it just tasty pelmini?

[Doctor_Skank]

Jeepers Skank, I know you like them skinny but come on! How did you not impale yourself on the girl's pelvic bone?

Doggy style?

She wasn't that skinny.. just tall.

Sometimes I like a bit more though too. Like this fat ass.

[Jake993]

Well just in case you forget what it looks like. Don't forget to suck the juice out.

Jeepers Skank, I know you like them skinny but come on! How did you not impale yourself on the girl's pelvic bone?

[Doctor_Skank]

I need to dig up an old post from my first trip to Almaty. Yikes - I'm starting to shiver just thinking about it......

Well just in case you forget what it looks like. Don't forget to suck the juice out.

[Jake993]

I'm hungry.
By the way, ever had those Siberian/Kazakh "manti" type pelmeni, where you have to suck the hot juice out of?

I need to dig up an old post from my first trip to Almaty. Yikes - I'm starting to shiver just thinking about it......

[Doctor_Skank]

Glad you do Dr. S.
Let me illustrate my point for those who don't quite get the finer points of Slavic cooking.
Bon appetite.....

I'm hungry.

By the way, ever had those Siberian/Kazakh "manti" type pelmeni, where you have to suck the hot juice out of?

[Pizdyets]

1) post a good (but real) picture
2) write some things about yourself
3) convey the message that you are often in Russia/Ukraine
4) begin a conversation/banter
5) visit her/meet her within a relatively short time after starting contact

For some people points 3 and 5 are difficult, however both will increase your scoring chances tremendously.

As someone who lives in Moscow, I'm envious of all you visiting guys. When I'm travelling (eg Kiev, Piter, Minsk...), it's always easier to schedule my deffki, but when the dyev knows that you live there permanently, they seem less willing to adopt your schedule as when you'll only be in town for a few days. I thought about cooking up a story that I'm just visiting at my brother's place (who's on vacation or a business trip), but not sure I'd be able to sell it. I'm not a very good liar...

"If your house was burning down and you could only save one thing, and you had the choice between your cat and an old family photo album with the last portraits of your grandparents, which would you save?"

Shashlik iz kiski anyone?

[Jake993]

Uh, I get it. But damn, I'll never look at pelmeni the same way again.

Glad you do Dr. S.
Let me illustrate my point for those who don't quite get the finer points of Slavic cooking.
Bon appetite.....

[Doctor_Skank]

Russian a striking similarity to its Ukrainian cousin...Basically the same two "lips" ..what's inside...pair of lips that can be easily parted like butter

Uh, I get it. But damn, I'll never look at pelmeni the same way again.

Once met a girl on a website who had listed under "things I like": kolbaski/sausages

I met her think it was hide the salami time, unfortunately she really just liked sausages. Took me 3 (!) dates and way too much effort to get her to like mine. )

[Hecker]

True enough, Russian girls are easier going, more "up-to-date" and open than their Ukrainian sisters in my opinion, especially those based in big cities.

BTW: шашлыки translates better as BBQ. Pelmeni is something different, although equally delicious.

Yes, I confirm that. Especially ukrainian girls from provincial cities are very primitive. You can observe the difference when you talk to an ukrainian girl who has a russian friend. Great difference indeed.

[Jake993]

Pelmeni is something different, although equally delicious.

As an expat friend in Moscow pointed out on my last trip to Moscow, the Russian Pelmeni bears a striking similarity to its Ukrainian cousin, Vereneki.

Basically the same food (a dumpling of sorts) Pelmeni differs in shape to Vereneki just a little at point where the two "lips" of dough come together. In the Pelmeni the join often puckers a bit to reveal a small view of stuffing (which can be meat, cheese, or potato) to reveal a hint of what's inside.

Often called Perogi on this continent (NA) the Vereneki are very similar to the Pelmeni in shape but the fold of dough comes together to form a vertical pair of lips (depending on how you hold it) but rather than revealing any of the goodies inside come together to form a smooth join that can be easily parted given the right additive like butter, sour cream or even olive oil.

Does this remind anyone of anything?

Funny how food can often imitate anatomy.

[Ham Yai]

You have been warned and don't even think about bringing them to the UK