Food in Tijuana

[Member #4730]

Wow, what a story. I just wanted to chip in my two cents on your situation based on previous posts I have read of yours, and since this girl seems to mean a lot to you. I really think you should see this girl in person again before your trip, because from what I am reading, it sounds like the Paris trip has a high probability of not going well, specifically when you say "the spark and fire is gone and the GFE non existent". A similar situation happened to me with a working girl I went on a trip with, except the "fight" happened on the first night of the trip, as compared to a few months before. With my girl, for the rest of the trip, there was an awkward sense of tension between us. I tried talking to her and asking her what was wrong, but she insisted things were ok, even though I could clearly see they weren't. I do not want the same to happen to you and your girl.

Being that she is a working girl, I am a little surprised she developed feelings for you, but I guess the gifts you gave her and the mini trips / getaways with her unlocked her heart. From what you have wrote, it seems like she thought you guys were exclusive, while you just want her to be at the top of your rotation. The birthday gift and mentioning you to her family is a clear sign she thought way differently of your potential future together than you did.

There are many ways you can go about this (cancelling the trip, trying to talk to her to diffuse the tension, visiting her in person, doing nothing and waiting and hoping the trip will do well, etc). Like I mentioned in the first paragraph, I would go to see her again (not now but maybe next month) because I would want to enjoy a trip to Paris, rather than have a headache all day trying to deal with an unhappy girl traveling with you. I have been there before and it sucked. But the choice is up to you. Whatever you end up doing, I hope it works out man.

Well I am taking next week off and heading to Cancun with her. I know pretty crazy huh, but they all tell me I'm crazy. She can do video telecon for course work during day and hopefully complete homework as she states it is math intensive coursework. I'm not an engineer so have no idea. I was thinking Isla Mujeres one day and Tulum the next. Not sure what are the best spots, but like you mentioned, if expectations don't go well during this trip, then maybe cancel Paris and go by myself for New Years or find another chica that is available. We agreed that drinking to where we both pass out and don't recall the events that happened isn't good for either of us.

She would send me nude photos, videos, and just general daily photos of what she ate and me being cynical/oblivious thought she was sending these to everyone she has ever met at HK. I can read people, but only when I can also see body language, but hard to tell in phone calls and texts. Like you mentioned, she thought we were exclusive and I wasnt aware of that arrangement. She told me te quiero multiple times but said it meant she loves me a little and not the amor type of love. I was confused and kept saying I miss her a little as a joke. Being around her makes me nervous as I know it is dangerous feeling this way as the other regulars are more carefree and enjoy time together, but this feeling is more intense with her. It is like she lit my soul on fire. The last night in Rosarito I can recall listening to Dread Mar Asi Fue and she said Juan Gabriel sang it better. So we listened to each version and I told her I felt the song in my heart even though I dont understand Spanish. She played some other songs for me and it was a memorable bonding experience. Funny the next day I just drop kicked her when I took her to the restaurant that I took another regular. I honestly didnt think twice about how she felt as some of the other regulars are always so kind and hospitable. Im glad Thailand isnt right across the border from the U.S. as Im sure those ladies offer same level of hospitality, but better food. You have a link to your trip?

[RonFromSichuan]

She came back after emptying her stomach of Don Julio and her homework was back at the apartment that she was supposed to be turned in Monday morning, but now she isn't able to since we are not close by. Eventually we pack our stuff and check out. I take her back to the apartment and she bids me farewell. The spark and fire is gone and the GFE non existent, but what can I expect when I admit to her I'm a ho. So not sure where things are headed, but we are going to Paris for New Years and I used my miles to book us business class seats from Mexico City. Hopefully the fire comes back as she was at the top of my regular rotation. Either way, I am not worried about how things turn out as she seems to capture my soul more than the others. For some reason she put a spell on me.

Wow, what a story. I just wanted to chip in my two cents on your situation based on previous posts I have read of yours, and since this girl seems to mean a lot to you. I really think you should see this girl in person again before your trip, because from what I am reading, it sounds like the Paris trip has a high probability of not going well, specifically when you say "the spark and fire is gone and the GFE non existent". A similar situation happened to me with a working girl I went on a trip with, except the "fight" happened on the first night of the trip, as compared to a few months before. With my girl, for the rest of the trip, there was an awkward sense of tension between us. I tried talking to her and asking her what was wrong, but she insisted things were ok, even though I could clearly see they weren't. I do not want the same to happen to you and your girl.

Being that she is a working girl, I am a little surprised she developed feelings for you, but I guess the gifts you gave her and the mini trips / getaways with her unlocked her heart. From what you have wrote, it seems like she thought you guys were exclusive, while you just want her to be at the top of your rotation. The birthday gift and mentioning you to her family is a clear sign she thought way differently of your potential future together than you did.

There are many ways you can go about this (cancelling the trip, trying to talk to her to diffuse the tension, visiting her in person, doing nothing and waiting and hoping the trip will do well, etc). Like I mentioned in the first paragraph, I would go to see her again (not now but maybe next month) because I would want to enjoy a trip to Paris, rather than have a headache all day trying to deal with an unhappy girl traveling with you. I have been there before and it sucked. But the choice is up to you. Whatever you end up doing, I hope it works out man.

[Jackie888]

Damn, Al Capone restaurant closed down business I think. Either that or the staff is on vacation.

[Member #4730]

The only hard thing about these next 2 months is that I assume she has or is going back home to finish school so your only contact with her will be thru txt and video calls. As you state before this is very easy way for them to say what you want to hea and not see their body language and such. So things could seem to be perfect and suddenly when you are together on this trip she isn't the same and now your stuck. You seem to have a positive attitude about it and will make the best of a bad situation if the trip doesn't go well I wish you the best.

In regards to the family photos it could be just a way to feel like she is serious. I'm not saying she isn't it's just very very similar to a situation I went thru last year with a girl who started sending me almost all her family pics and telling me her life story and wanted to get married after just a few hours together and most of the time I was drunk or passed out. She was always great at texting and what she wanted to do in bed yet when I would visit she would act differently. I always told her that actions speak louder than words. That's just my experience and so you're maybe different just something to think about. Not that you haven't thought about this enough already. Also the age difference reminds me of my situation. I know in the Latin culture it's more common but I'm always suspicious of it. I mean in reality when you have that much of an age difference and you don't speak the same language it's hard to really think that you have much in common.

I hope I'm proved to be wrong. I'm just giving my thoughts and views from experience.

Thanks for sharing and I agree that actions speak louder than words. She hasn't gave me the cold shoulder only when I told her about the others. I was very cynical and assumed she was still seeing others since she has a rather large social media following. The fact her cousin and aunt know about me, it made me question if she truly does think something of the time we spend together as you normally wouldn't tell family about some gringo you met at a "club". I think sharing the whole bottle of Don Julio 70 was enough to just stick with nonalcoholic beverages in the future. I felt fine the next day after sleeping it off, but she is half my weight and was praying to the porcelain goddess in the bathroom. She felt like shit and I told her when I was younger I'd get wasted every weekend, but it wasn't productive. She agreed that she shouldn't drink so much. The next 2 months will be interesting and maybe still see the other regulars. 😂.

[Member #4730]

Yah, I learned the hard way, never talk about other girls when your on a "date" even with a chica. All girls have feelings and it just brings their interest level down when us men do that.

Yeah I definitely killed the vibe on the second day. I'll try to keep the focus on them instead of mentioning the "friend" I came with.

[Member #4730]

Kudo's for being totally honest with her. I know her reaction isn't what you dreamed of or wanted. But all the signals are showing and it's exactly what you need to say. At best I would have her as a "special friend" that you go on trips with. Help her out a bit as you help out your other friend but let her know you don't go on trips with the other girls because you love spending time with her. Also. For me, a girl that I really enjoyed. We could just hang out in a motel 6 and eat street taco's. Talk. Laugh, fuck etc. The lifestyle you live is what she may want but to actually be a girlfriend. If you didn't live that lifestyle would she still care and spend time with you? I am considering going to Philippines once I retire as 60 year old guys can go out with 35 year old Filipino's and their society doesn't even care about age gaps.

Don't feel bad for killing the weekend with the honesty. Be thankful she was honest to show you how ticked off she was and what your future life will look like if you continue with the same relationship expectation with her.

I have many female friends that I just take vacations with. (there is no sex) but it's great as they are great to share time with just as friends. I even take an evening or two during our trips for some mongering. It works out great!

This girl needs to let go of the "relationship" part as I just think that is a crazy road to try to manage. But an semi-open relationship, that's something that could maybe work?

My .02 worth from the peanut gallery.

G.

Yeah I need to stop accepting invitations to their homes. It makes me realize how little they have and how I take things we have in the USA For granted. I got the other regular a mini fridge from my home gym that I hardly use and a portable AC during the summer as sessions in her apartment were brutal in the heat. Also installed a new shower head with hose extension since they all seem to have the cheapest contractor / rental fixtures you can buy similar to the short time rooms. I have never been to the PI, but my ex was deployed to Zamboanga and worked at the embassy for a half year. She told me I'm never allowed to go without her as the women would be lined up for a gringo. It sounds like heaven. One time she flew from the USA To Dubai for a short 4 day trip as her male cousin said a bunch of prostitutes were in the city. I traveled through Dubai often and I can verify that he is correct. I love variety.

[SeaBeeJoe]

I told her the first day was heaven and the second day was hell when I mentioned I went with another chica to the restaurant I took her to.

Yah, I learned the hard way, never talk about other girls when your on a "date" even with a chica. All girls have feelings and it just brings their interest level down when us men do that.

[SeaBeeJoe]

I understand everyone has their opinion and thanks for your input. At times I have to step back and rationalize what is really going through their head. She seems genuine as she would send me photos of her and the family, her hometown, and also mentioned I should visit her place. I wouldn't visit unless it was really serious and would be a bit odd as she is almost half my age. I'm sure her father would have different thoughts of the situation and he seems like a big dude. Her cousin and aunt were pretty friendly. They just said to keep her safe. I was invited to a night out with her friends, but I am tied up on the weekends and also not sure about hanging out with her friends that are almost half my age. Maybe she just wants to get a good read on what her friends think about me. All I know is whatever she was thinking I probably crushed it and kicked it down the road. She is still cool to hang out with, but not the same as the trip to Rosarito. I told her the first day was heaven and the second day was hell when I mentioned I went with another chica to the restaurant I took her to. Either way, I live in a first world country with plenty of opportunities and we are in the top 10% of the world earners. When she tells me the cost of living in Mexico, I think man I'd be retired long time ago.

Yah, I learned the hard way, never talk about other girls when your on a "date" even with a chica. All girls have feelings and it just brings their interest level down.

[Gregyyr]

She came back after emptying her stomach of Don Julio and her homework was back at the apartment that she was supposed to be turned in Monday morning, but now she isn't able to since we are not close by. Eventually we pack our stuff and check out. I take her back to the apartment and she bids me farewell. The spark and fire is gone and the GFE non existent, but what can I expect when I admit to her I'm a ho. So not sure where things are headed, but we are going to Paris for New Years and I used my miles to book us business class seats from Mexico City. Hopefully the fire comes back as she was at the top of my regular rotation. Either way, I am not worried about how things turn out as she seems to capture my soul more than the others. For some reason she put a spell on me.

Kudo's for being totally honest with her. I know her reaction isn't what you dreamed of or wanted. But all the signals are showing and it's exactly what you need to say. At best I would have her as a "special friend" that you go on trips with. Help her out a bit as you help out your other friend but let her know you don't go on trips with the other girls because you love spending time with her. Also. For me, a girl that I really enjoyed. We could just hang out in a motel 6 and eat street taco's. Talk. Laugh, fuck etc. The lifestyle you live is what she may want but to actually be a girlfriend. If you didn't live that lifestyle would she still care and spend time with you? I am considering going to Philippines once I retire as 60 year old guys can go out with 35 year old Filipino's and their society doesn't even care about age gaps.

Don't feel bad for killing the weekend with the honesty. Be thankful she was honest to show you how ticked off she was and what your future life will look like if you continue with the same relationship expectation with her.

I have many female friends that I just take vacations with. (there is no sex) but it's great as they are great to share time with just as friends. I even take an evening or two during our trips for some mongering. It works out great!

This girl needs to let go of the "relationship" part as I just think that is a crazy road to try to manage. But an semi-open relationship, that's something that could maybe work?

My .02 worth from the peanut gallery.

G.

[Big Magick]

Thanks for the advice everyone but I can't see myself losing years of my life to mongering like I did other addictions. The fact that we have the money to party and sleep with some of the most beautiful women in the world is nothing short of amazing. Some people don't even have food to eat, really puts things in perspective. The experiences I've had in the zona have made me a genuinely happy person. I never got that phase most young men go through where you sleep around. The zona has made up for it, I no longer live with constant sexual frustration LOL. I've had some bros give me great rational advice about dating bar girls. Some more cynical than others. We say don't trust these women because they are basically all gold diggers but have you seen the women in America lately? They are all the same if not worse. Sure you can always find genuine caring women in any country but lets be real, those kind of girls are hard to find and usually aren't the prettiest girls. Women are hard wired to find the best men. Its either our looks, money, or charisma that attracts them. We say the bar girl relationships aren't real but what makes a genuine relationship? This is the real world and money is part of what attracts women. Sure it shouldn't be the only reason and that's something to look out for but some of the sweetest most genuine girls I've met in my life have been in Mexico. I've had some deep conversations with bar girls about the struggles of life, something I never really gotten out of American women. Sounds funny but the connections I've made with some of the girls have been my most meaningful. Its why I eventually plan to move to Mexico and date there. Living day to day in the moment is something I admire about Mexican culture.

So no this isn't depressing, quite the opposite actually.

[Sol12]

I could cancel the trip a month out, but she still says she wants to go and only thing out of my pocket is flight, meals, and hotel. She isn't asking for daily allowance. I will see how these two months go and if they aren't great, then just go on the trip and tell her it was nice knowing you. Originally was going to go on a shorter trip to Cancun with her, but the airline miles I have had low redemption rate for business class out of Mexico City to Paris. She is graduating from her engineering degree next year (hopefully). I think that she has champagne tastes on a beer budget. Just thought I'd fulfill a wish for someone that has been so generous with their time. She said it would probably take her a decade to plan a trip like the one we are going on over New Years.

The only hard thing about these next 2 months is that I assume she has or is going back home to finish school so your only contact with her will be thru txt and video calls. As you state before this is very easy way for them to say what you want to hea and not see their body language and such. So things could seem to be perfect and suddenly when you are together on this trip she isn't the same and now your stuck. You seem to have a positive attitude about it and will make the best of a bad situation if the trip doesn't go well I wish you the best.

In regards to the family photos it could be just a way to feel like she is serious. I'm not saying she isn't it's just very very similar to a situation I went thru last year with a girl who started sending me almost all her family pics and telling me her life story and wanted to get married after just a few hours together and most of the time I was drunk or passed out. She was always great at texting and what she wanted to do in bed yet when I would visit she would act differently. I always told her that actions speak louder than words. That's just my experience and so you're maybe different just something to think about. Not that you haven't thought about this enough already. Also the age difference reminds me of my situation. I know in the Latin culture it's more common but I'm always suspicious of it. I mean in reality when you have that much of an age difference and you don't speak the same language it's hard to really think that you have much in common.

I hope I'm proved to be wrong. I'm just giving my thoughts and views from experience.

[Member #4730]

KB,

This is not fair of me to say. Because, I don't have near enough information. I just caution you to be careful. I just want you to pause and ask yourself what your goals are. This is totally based on my uninformed assumptions. And I don't know you from the Captain. But I think you are getting close to a danger point. Unlike many others on this board, I 100% believe a relationship with a former BG is possible. Is it easy? Hell no. I'm not encouraging or discouraging that. But I went down a similar road. Multiple times now. LOL The one that ended poorly messed me up. Big time. And it was not easy to move past. The fault was with me because I never really stopped to think what I really wanted.

I understand everyone has their opinion and thanks for your input. At times I have to step back and rationalize what is really going through their head. She seems genuine as she would send me photos of her and the family, her hometown, and also mentioned I should visit her place. I wouldn't visit unless it was really serious and would be a bit odd as she is almost half my age. I'm sure her father would have different thoughts of the situation and he seems like a big dude. Her cousin and aunt were pretty friendly. They just said to keep her safe. I was invited to a night out with her friends, but I am tied up on the weekends and also not sure about hanging out with her friends that are almost half my age. Maybe she just wants to get a good read on what her friends think about me. All I know is whatever she was thinking I probably crushed it and kicked it down the road. She is still cool to hang out with, but not the same as the trip to Rosarito. I told her the first day was heaven and the second day was hell when I mentioned I went with another chica to the restaurant I took her to. Either way, I live in a first world country with plenty of opportunities and we are in the top 10% of the world earners. When she tells me the cost of living in Mexico, I think man I'd be retired long time ago.

[Member #4730]

Well very interesting. Seems like she likes the drama. To get mad and not talk to you for so long but still want to spend time with you is odd. Also the no sex without a condom thing also seems to be a way out for her. I doubt you can get your money back but the way things seem to be I don't understand why you would want to spend time with her in Paris since she seems to get upset quickly and my guess is she will do this in Paris and make it a very long trip. I usually try to give all the girls the benefit of doubt but this last episode makes me understand her better. I hope I'm wrong and all goes great and she is cool but many red flags for me.

I didn't realize this was the girl you had talked about going to Paris with and had thought from a previous post you had changed your mind. Hopefully she's just not using you for a free trip. These next 2 months shall be interesting.

Good luck.

I could cancel the trip a month out, but she still says she wants to go and only thing out of my pocket is flight, meals, and hotel. She isn't asking for daily allowance. I will see how these two months go and if they aren't great, then just go on the trip and tell her it was nice knowing you. Originally was going to go on a shorter trip to Cancun with her, but the airline miles I have had low redemption rate for business class out of Mexico City to Paris. She is graduating from her engineering degree next year (hopefully). I think that she has champagne tastes on a beer budget. Just thought I'd fulfill a wish for someone that has been so generous with their time. She said it would probably take her a decade to plan a trip like the one we are going on over New Years.

[DramaFree11]

Bro, Mexican culture is one of living day to day. Most Mexicans don't make enough money to save anything after paying what is necessary to survive. Now the Putas they make money yes, sometimes a lot of it, but guess what, their family always hits them up for money too. The greatest pimp in a putas life is "la Madre" the mother LOL, unless they actually have a real life pimp, then it is even more fucked up. "Reasonably priced" that is not in the vocabulary in the zona, unless you negotiate it all yourself with the girl, the clubs don't care, they would love you to blow all your money with them, they could give a shit less about the customer, more will only take your place. Anyways Mexico does have some good food, i always love them tacos, now that is a good deal!!

So true. The part of the family and mother's is so true. The stories I hear from my girls in MTY blow my mind. Controlling, jealousy and sabotaging behavior, from the families is the norm especially the mothers, it is just F. Nuts. These girls start doing well and there parents screw it up for them. In America we deal with the Substance abuse issue, Mexico has other issues. It is just crazy, I still do not believe some of the stories these girls tell me about there families.

As far a GDL, great place, but for work it probably one of the last places I would go as a girl. Yes, the city is very cheap, but salaries are low and lots of competition. If they truly wanted to better themselves then MTY or Mexico City is the place to be, but most Mexican girls can not handle those cities just to fast pace for them.

I love Mexico, especially girls and the food. The mothers suck!

[Sol12]

True statement. The regular's aunt that introduced her to HK worked there a few decades ago, found a husband and stopped working. They recently got divorced and she is back to working to support herself in her 40's. She has a nice body and decent face, but would be hard to compete with younger bar girls.

I don't think any of us go to Tijuana to find a serious relationship with a bar girl. I think it mostly has to do where you spend most of your time and who you meet. Before people would spend a lot of time at church and meet someone there. Later more and more people would meet at college. Now people are spending more time online so they meet people that way. For those of us that would spend are time in a bar and not look for other opportunities you find yourself seeing the bar as normal and your not trying to save anyone you just want a relationship with that person and that includes them not working anymore. Now the hard part is if the relationship ends and the thought of them having to go back to that scene if that's what they want is very hard and sometimes you might do things to prevent that which doesn't really help since the relationship is already over but at least you don't have the guilt of throwing them back into that.

That's why I just advise not to let it get to that point and have fun but always make it clear that this is not a real relationship and if they have better opportunities with someone or something else they should do that as your not looking to get married or support them.