Food in Tijuana

[Member #4730]

Great that you will address these issues with her and you have them written out so she knows you are genuine and have be and thinking a lot on this matter. I get confused with the anxious part of seeing her as she seems like a nice girl. Maybe it's just that she's very serious and not a clueless young girl like most in HK or other bars.

Well if all goes right and she wants s to be in Tijuana if you want a real relationship I would recommend you Ben in Tijuana a with her as much as possible if not full time. I remember a friend of a friend who had a girl in a house he bought by a he golf course. I went one time and the girl was all alone and he house just seemed sad since he only came by for a short time it just didn't feel like it was lived in and had no personality. Also just felt bad for the girl spending all that time alone waiting for him.

I imagine your kicking yourself for not learning more Spanish in your past since you can communicate with your phone but it's still not the same.

I too look on SA since I just want a part time girlfriend type thing to take trips with but have yet to contact anyone but will maybe try after the holidays.

I get anxious as I am somewhat cynical in regards to a "relationship" with a bar girl. She is my favorite of all the regulars and just pushes all the right buttons when we're together. Everything seems to click with each other and we both seem to know what the other is thinking. I met her cousin at the apartment and he spoke perfect English and asked my name and said he has heard about me. I felt kind of shitty as she has been telling her family about me as the "boyfriend" she met at the "club. " She was scared of him asking me how we met and I said he didn't ask and if he did, then I'd just say we met at the club.

I just returned from the overnight trip and will do a report where I passed out in El Jardin for a couple of hours and we finished a whole bottle of Don Julio 70. Interesting trip, but also good to get closure on a few concerns. It definitely won't be the same for quite a while and not sure where things are headed, but if all else fails, then plenty of variety in Mexico and the world.

[SeaBeeJoe]

First paragraph, well said, ain't that the truth. We should just learn to accept the facts.

As for the2nd paragraph, maybe the zona is a fucked up place, but it does not have to be that way. There are places where the culture has accepted the fact that women can sell their pussy and men are ready and willing to buy. A few places I can think of are, Germany, Switzerland, Thailand, Dubai, and maybe others. The German FKK model is probably the best, safe and reasonably priced. Why can't the zona copy that, probably unlikely due the culture in Mexico.

Bro, Mexican culture is one of living day to day. Most Mexicans don't make enough money to save anything after paying what is necessary to survive. Now the Putas they make money yes, sometimes a lot of it, but guess what, their family always hits them up for money too. The greatest pimp in a putas life is "la Madre" the mother LOL, unless they actually have a real life pimp, then it is even more fucked up. "Reasonably priced" that is not in the vocabulary in the zona, unless you negotiate it all yourself with the girl, the clubs don't care, they would love you to blow all your money with them, they could give a shit less about the customer, more will only take your place. Anyways Mexico does have some good food, i always love them tacos, now that is a good deal!!

[Lefeu]

...For us mongers it is an addiction that ends when we run out of money. For the ladies, they will keep selling their pussy until they are too old and ugly to be attractive at any price for a client.

The zona is a fucked up place...

First paragraph, well said, ain't that the truth. We should just learn to accept the facts.

As for the2nd paragraph, maybe the zona is a fucked up place, but it does not have to be that way. There are places where the culture has accepted the fact that women can sell their pussy and men are ready and willing to buy. A few places I can think of are, Germany, Switzerland, Thailand, Dubai, and maybe others. The German FKK model is probably the best, safe and reasonably priced. Why can't the zona copy that, probably unlikely due the culture in Mexico.

[SeaBeeJoe]

Sorry to hear that you're going down a path that you may not like. Honestly its posts like this that make me question why I am so excited to go to Tijuana here in October when I know after the first load is spilled, I will have some regrets. Not sure why this happens to us males, but I think the girls are "trained" to deal with this a bit. At least some of the regulars I see outside of Tijuana on the East Coast are. I do think I am getting addicted to Sex myself. Because I think about the opportunities a lot. Like OMG I have XXX amount of money to spend. That's a nice session if I want it. I also gamble and enjoy some Mary J on occasion but those do not really get me the way that sex does. Anyways your not alone. Getting out will be hard. Especially because its an addiction that we see all the time. Sex sells. They use it in marketing, sales just everything. You walk into a mall and there are a bunch of great looking girls. Gets ya going, makes you think about it. Anyways just my 2 cents. Good luck and enjoy the ride while you can!

Thank you for your words, i am a long time vet of the zona and honestly there is no "pretty woman" ending. For us mongers it is an addiction that ends when we run out of money. For the ladies, they will keep selling their pussy until they are too old and ugly to be attractive at any price for a client. Some girls get of prostitution and never return, but sadly many of them always return when they need the money. The zona is a fucked up place. I have seen many sad things there, also some pretty funny things as well. I will say one thing dont try to "save" a puta, they will quit prostitution when they decide they are ready.

[HellBoyX]

The more familiar I get with what goes on behind the scenes at HK, the more depressing it seems to get. These girls do a ton of drugs, most likely to escape the harsh reality of having no other choice then being a working girl. The more I go, the emptier the sex makes me feel, now I've been doing more drugs to overcome those feelings of post sex sadness, not a good path. A professional psychologist / therapist would probably love to pick our brains. I'm addicted to sex drugs and gambling. Interestingly all things that raise dopamine. Seems like most mongers are addicted to "the chase". Sometimes I think having a regular relationship would be better but I know myself well enough that I would eventually want to hoe around again.

Sorry to hear that you're going down a path that you may not like. Honestly its posts like this that make me question why I am so excited to go to Tijuana here in October when I know after the first load is spilled, I will have some regrets. Not sure why this happens to us males, but I think the girls are "trained" to deal with this a bit. At least some of the regulars I see outside of Tijuana on the East Coast are. I do think I am getting addicted to Sex myself. Because I think about the opportunities a lot. Like OMG I have XXX amount of money to spend. That's a nice session if I want it. I also gamble and enjoy some Mary J on occasion but those do not really get me the way that sex does. Anyways your not alone. Getting out will be hard. Especially because its an addiction that we see all the time. Sex sells. They use it in marketing, sales just everything. You walk into a mall and there are a bunch of great looking girls. Gets ya going, makes you think about it. Anyways just my 2 cents. Good luck and enjoy the ride while you can!

[Big Magick]

It is the girl I met over the summer that was upset about the threesome and then spent some overnights with in Marriott and HK. I wouldn't assume they would get jealous as they worked in the bar and should know most of the clients are international sex addicts. It could be good or bad as we vacation in other countries to sleep with women from all over the world. She is very intense and almost scary to be with at times as I enjoy it so much. My heart says to keep seeing her, but mind knows it is dangerous. All of the regulars I've met have something special that piques my interests and that is why I continue to see them until it isn't fun anymore. If she isn't cool with me seeing other chicas, then it will be a sad day as I'll just have to cut ties.

The sad thing is that her aunt was the one that mentioned it as a means to make more money. I don't see how she is going to be able to survive as an intern in GDL with what they pay, but she said it is to gain experience and hopefully convert to full time position. The refreshing thing about seeing the regulars I meet in the bars is that I don't have to feel guilt about my hoing around. They know not to ask as I'm going to give them the honest answer. I think it is a temporary escape from their reality. Some regulars drink too much or smoke too much and it annoys me a little as the only vices I have are sex and gambling. They seem to use it as a crutch to disconnect from the matrix. It is similar to what I do when I spend time with them, but understand it isnt a normal relationship. Almost depressing at times, but it fulfills my wants and needs for that moment in time until I return back to the U.S.

The more familiar I get with what goes on behind the scenes at HK, the more depressing it seems to get. These girls do a ton of drugs, most likely to escape the harsh reality of having no other choice then being a working girl. The more I go, the emptier the sex makes me feel, now I've been doing more drugs to overcome those feelings of post sex sadness, not a good path. A professional psychologist / therapist would probably love to pick our brains. I'm addicted to sex drugs and gambling. Interestingly all things that raise dopamine. Seems like most mongers are addicted to "the chase". Sometimes I think having a regular relationship would be better but I know myself well enough that I would eventually want to hoe around again.

[Sol12]

I'm meeting her tonight and having dinner at Chapultepec. I'm bringing a list of more serious questions. We will see if I keep seeing her or just break it off. I don't get anxious meeting the other regulars where it feels natural and stress free. This one makes me feel like I'm walking on the edge of a cliff for some reason. She mentioned she would stay in Tijuana since she has cousins and a friend from her hometown in the area. I know when feelings get involved that jealousy creeps in. It happened in Thailand with another threesome where the Thai regular was jealous of the third wheel. I just never learn and junior takes over the party. Depending on the answers and body language she gives off, who knows, maybe I'm moving to Tijuana part-time. I may be falling face first into a pile of shit, but hopefully come out smelling like roses. I setup an SA account and getting hits from ladies in SoCal and Mexico so might try that angle if I get bored of the club scene/bar girls. The Latinas seem to be something else though or maybe it is due to me being able to drive over every week to meet them.

Great that you will address these issues with her and you have them written out so she knows you are genuine and have be and thinking a lot on this matter. I get confused with the anxious part of seeing her as she seems like a nice girl. Maybe it's just that she's very serious and not a clueless young girl like most in HK or other bars.

Well if all goes right and she wants s to be in Tijuana if you want a real relationship I would recommend you Ben in Tijuana a with her as much as possible if not full time. I remember a friend of a friend who had a girl in a house he bought by a he golf course. I went one time and the girl was all alone and he house just seemed sad since he only came by for a short time it just didn't feel like it was lived in and had no personality. Also just felt bad for the girl spending all that time alone waiting for him.

I imagine your kicking yourself for not learning more Spanish in your past since you can communicate with your phone but it's still not the same.

I too look on SA since I just want a part time girlfriend type thing to take trips with but have yet to contact anyone but will maybe try after the holidays.

[Member #4730]

Well sh seems to be a sweet girl and not asking much if anything from you. I understand not wanting to go to GDL but it's a great city. Yes much more work for her compared to Tijuana were it's more of a factory worker city and not all the tech and large companies like GDL. It's a lot better scenery that is true. Also doesn't get as cold as Tijuana which most girls don't like when having to be in Tijuana in the winter.

They may work in a bar but they are still Latin women and very jealous. I've seen many fights over clients while hanging out.

I'm meeting her tonight and having dinner at Chapultepec. I'm bringing a list of more serious questions. We will see if I keep seeing her or just break it off. I don't get anxious meeting the other regulars where it feels natural and stress free. This one makes me feel like I'm walking on the edge of a cliff for some reason. She mentioned she would stay in Tijuana since she has cousins and a friend from her hometown in the area. I know when feelings get involved that jealousy creeps in. It happened in Thailand with another threesome where the Thai regular was jealous of the third wheel. I just never learn and junior takes over the party. Depending on the answers and body language she gives off, who knows, maybe I'm moving to Tijuana part-time. I may be falling face first into a pile of shit, but hopefully come out smelling like roses. I setup an SA account and getting hits from ladies in SoCal and Mexico so might try that angle if I get bored of the club scene/bar girls. The Latinas seem to be something else though or maybe it is due to me being able to drive over every week to meet them.

[Sol12]

I told her I'd be willing to help her out if she ever gets in a pinch and sent her $300 through money gram and also paid for the flight to TIJ. I said I could help her out more if she comes to TIJ as Id be able to see her more often. I don't feel like flying to GDL and never been before. She said more professional opportunities for her in GDL and also cheaper COL as well compared to TIJ. Also she said the scenery is a better fit for her and her aunt is working to help with her living expenses. I only do weed and ecstasy was like 2 decades ago. I like to feel present when I'm with people and not under the influence. Also everything I do comes from a good heart. I believe in trying to lift people up that bring value to your life. I've helped one regular fix stuff in her apartment and get her some furniture and this one I said I could help if she lived in Tijuana, but never thought that someone that worked in a bar would get jealous.

Well sh seems to be a sweet girl and not asking much if anything from you. I understand not wanting to go to GDL but it's a great city. Yes much more work for her compared to Tijuana were it's more of a factory worker city and not all the tech and large companies like GDL. It's a lot better scenery that is true. Also doesn't get as cold as Tijuana which most girls don't like when having to be in Tijuana in the winter.

They may work in a bar but they are still Latin women and very jealous. I've seen many fights over clients while hanging out.

[Member #4730]

So you seem to have a lot of conversations with this girl on texts and video so she might of gotten the wrong idea. It seems she wants more of a relationship with you or you are helping her out. It's your business and your money so I'm not judging you if you've been sending her money while she's back home it just makes me understand the situation more.

I would just talk to her about what she wants and maybe she'd be happy with you being like a sugar daddy that gives her a monthly allowance to help her and if she's in Guadalajara you would see her when you can and if she's in Tijuana then things would be better for you. No matter what city she lives in she will still be able to work on the side to make more money.

Yeah I wasn't sure what drugs you did as it seemed the girls you spent time with were all into them. Which is no big deal but some girls just want to party and have fun with a guy they trust. I agree that it's not attractive to see them always in this light. I hope you get your thoughts together on what you want and are honest with her at least so not to string her along. From all you say you seem to have a good heart and will do the right thing. Best of luck.

I told her I'd be willing to help her out if she ever gets in a pinch and sent her $300 through money gram and also paid for the flight to TIJ. I said I could help her out more if she comes to TIJ as Id be able to see her more often. I don't feel like flying to GDL and never been before. She said more professional opportunities for her in GDL and also cheaper COL as well compared to TIJ. Also she said the scenery is a better fit for her and her aunt is working to help with her living expenses. I only do weed and ecstasy was like 2 decades ago. I like to feel present when I'm with people and not under the influence. Also everything I do comes from a good heart. I believe in trying to lift people up that bring value to your life. I've helped one regular fix stuff in her apartment and get her some furniture and this one I said I could help if she lived in Tijuana, but never thought that someone that worked in a bar would get jealous.

[Sol12]

This is another important reality that I learned. These girls see every gringo as "wealthy". I'm stating the obvious, but relatively speaking, we are better off financially. But they do not really translate cost of living. They see you spend $500 in discretionary items and that is the equivalent, to us, of a gringo blowing 10 K in a club one night. You can try to explain cost of living to them, but as you said, some live in very meager conditions, so it just doesn't translate.

Maybe it's not worth the time to understand the mindset of these chicas. But I find it fascinating, in a sociological manner.

Well it's not just gringos they think and most Mexicans think if you live in the USA you can help them. I can't count the number of times that friends of mine here that have family in Mexico and if anything ever goes wrong they are on speed dial and call looking for money. Now some people are able to spend on things that seem expensive but most families here especially in California have many expenses and not much money left to help, the family always. They never seem to understand that.

[Member #4730]

Great advice, Sol. I'll add my two cents. I think you have to look at it from the girl's perspective. I would say 70% of bar girls are looking for a gringo to support them regularly so they can get out of the bar game. The important thing to keep in mind is that these girls have heard it all from drunk gringos. So I believe most are highly skeptical of everything. I think this girl is thinking one of two things. Either she caught feelings and she's hurt. In that case, the fact that she told you other girls are fine was a lie. She didn't want to scare you away with any sort of commitment. May not have even believed you. If she's coming to Tijuana to see you, that tells me she's thinking relationship. The other clue: she was not as receptive to multiple sessions. In my first relationship (former escort, not BG), she was always suspicious of my feelings, thinking I wanted "free sex". We eventually got over that but I think that might be on her mind. Again, many gringos lie to them regularly. I'm not defending her, just speculating on her mindset.

The other possibility is she sees you as a meal ticket and these other girls are the competition. That's cynical. But I think if this was the case, she would have given you the cold shoulder or anger, not tears.

I've been there. Multiple times. When you have regulars, the lines get blurred. Often times, on both sides. When you share meals, nights, life goals, etc, it's easy for feelings to get involved. I'm not discouraging you, but just be sure your head is clear with your wants and expectations.

Her face looked like she was ready to explode in tears, but did a great job of holding it back. I felt like shit and told her I'm here if you need me since I know she isn't working and want to make sure she completes her degree. If she doesn't complete her degree and continues working the bar, then I'll be disappointed, but not surprised.

The other regulars are about having fun and some could be catching feelings, but haven't came out to say anything. Some have puppy dog eyes when I leave, but could just be the fact they are mentally returning back to reality. This girl mentioned she was catching feelings on multiple occasions and I told her best to stay friends as I know I'm an intense person if I ever decide to let myself fall in love. I told her she shouldn't fall in love if she decides to continue working in the bars, as it only results in hurt feelings. Heartless for me to say, maybe, but like to be honest with them.

All of them have different things that keep my interest and it depends on the time of day on what I want satisfied. The sexcapade did make me realize and I think for her as well, I have issues as she wasn't that into it the last session before we had to leave. I think we had sex 7-8 times in the span of 18 hours together. I thought I met my sexual equivalent, but I guess I will have to keep searching if things fall out with her.

[Sol12]

Great advice, Sol. I'll add my two cents. I think you have to look at it from the girl's perspective. I would say 70% of bar girls are looking for a gringo to support them regularly so they can get out of the bar game. The important thing to keep in mind is that these girls have heard it all from drunk gringos. So I believe most are highly skeptical of everything. I think this girl is thinking one of two things. Either she caught feelings and she's hurt. In that case, the fact that she told you other girls are fine was a lie. She didn't want to scare you away with any sort of commitment. May not have even believed you. If she's coming to Tijuana to see you, that tells me she's thinking relationship. The other clue: she was not as receptive to multiple sessions. In my first relationship (former escort, not BG), she was always suspicious of my feelings, thinking I wanted "free sex". We eventually got over that but I think that might be on her mind. Again, many gringos lie to them regularly. I'm not defending her, just speculating on her mindset.

The other possibility is she sees you as a meal ticket and these other girls are the competition. That's cynical. But I think if this was the case, she would have given you the cold shoulder or anger, not tears.

I've been there. Multiple times. When you have regulars, the lines get blurred. Often times, on both sides. When you share meals, nights, life goals, etc, it's easy for feelings to get involved. I'm not discouraging you, but just be sure your head is clear with your wants and expectations.

Yeah I've had way too much experience in this area so I just want to help and not be the usual guy that says they are just working girls and are using you for money. That's just the easy thing to say and of all the girls I would see none ever asked me for money for family or other things. You couldn't be more correct on the things these girls hear. I always tell them that they can't fall for the flash and talk of most guys since 90% of the time it is just show.

[Sol12]

It is the girl I met over the summer that was upset about the threesome and then spent some overnights with in Marriott and HK. I wouldn't assume they would get jealous as they worked in the bar and should know most of the clients are international sex addicts. It could be good or bad as we vacation in other countries to sleep with women from all over the world. She is very intense and almost scary to be with at times as I enjoy it so much. My heart says to keep seeing her, but mind knows it is dangerous. All of the regulars I've met have something special that piques my interests and that is why I continue to see them until it isn't fun anymore. If she isn't cool with me seeing other chicas, then it will be a sad day as I'll just have to cut ties.

Like most have mentioned, by treating them like a regular women we must be putting something in their mind that there is a better life outside of their impoverished reality. Most don't have the support system so they go out on their own to try and improve their situation even though it is a fucked up reality. I know I mentioned to her the Airbnb was $250 for the night and she was surprised as she stated her rent for apartment was $500 per month and Im dropping it on one night with her in Rosarito. Also the meals out probably spent close to $200 just for food and drinks. I would imagine that is one months worth of food for her, but all relative as in the U.S. she wouldnt be able to survive, especially NYC. My exwife has family in Brooklyn and they rent their apartments out for $3k per month which are tiny, but right across from Manhattan. .

So you seem to have a lot of conversations with this girl on texts and video so she might of gotten the wrong idea. It seems she wants more of a relationship with you or you are helping her out. It's your business and your money so I'm not judging you if you've been sending her money while she's back home it just makes me understand the situation more.

I would just talk to her about what she wants and maybe she'd be happy with you being like a sugar daddy that gives her a monthly allowance to help her and if she's in Guadalajara you would see her when you can and if she's in Tijuana then things would be better for you. No matter what city she lives in she will still be able to work on the side to make more money.

Yeah I wasn't sure what drugs you did as it seemed the girls you spent time with were all into them. Which is no big deal but some girls just want to party and have fun with a guy they trust. I agree that it's not attractive to see them always in this light. I hope you get your thoughts together on what you want and are honest with her at least so not to string her along. From all you say you seem to have a good heart and will do the right thing. Best of luck.

[Dcrist0527]

I know I mentioned to her the Airbnb was $250 for the night and she was surprised as she stated her rent for apartment was $500 per month and Im dropping it on one night with her in Rosarito. Also the meals out probably spent close to $200 just for food and drinks.

This is another important reality that I learned. These girls see every gringo as "wealthy". I'm stating the obvious, but relatively speaking, we are better off financially. But they do not really translate cost of living. They see you spend $500 in discretionary items and that is the equivalent, to us, of a gringo blowing 10 K in a club one night. You can try to explain cost of living to them, but as you said, some live in very meager conditions, so it just doesn't translate.

Maybe it's not worth the time to understand the mindset of these chicas. But I find it fascinating, in a sociological manner.