Thread: Seeking Arrangements
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02-10-24 05:34 #5458
Posts: 3299Originally Posted by AmericanPi [View Original Post]
Originally Posted by AmericanPi [View Original Post]
The issue I have with stereotyping with seeking is people say the women on seeking are all about the money. That is fine, but where is the world where women are not all about the money? Because IMO that world does not exist.
And with men with wealth, how would they get wealthy if they were not able to spot scam artists?
If you are saying do not trust the women at all, then all the women on seeking are hookers. I was not always right, but I think you need to have a scale of trust and put the women in the right category just like you do with escorts. I am not worried about hiding my wallet with a well reviewed $1000 an hour hooker, but I am with a street walker.
When I met women, I was analyzing what I wanted from them, how much I could trust them, and if they suited my needs. So the lowest form is you have straight up sex for money with no affection. Then there were friendly acquaintances where I knew a little about their life and there was some affection but it was mostly money for sex. That was kind of like a short term sugar baby, more trustworthy than a straight up hooker but more time and money would not mean more intimacy.
Then you have the deeper friendships with deeper trust. You trust keeping your wallet out. You trust going bare. You trust they are going to show up. You trust them that if you give them an monthly allowance they are not going to be hounding you for more money every time you meet. You trust that they are not going to have frequent costly emergencies. You trust when you see them they are going to sexually care for you. If you give more time and money, there is appreciation versus a scheme to get more. This is a real sugar baby, and it is not common. It is a true friendship, and I did not find many women on the site that were this trustworthy whom I really wanted to befriend.
Even rarer is when you have near complete trust and you have a woman in the GF / wife zone. That is the rarest of all.
I think what you are trying to say is that guys delude themselves into trusting the women too much early on. Guys are so anxious to have that GF / wife / SB woman that they overlook the red flags and get burned, and that does happen. It has happened to me many times.
But I do not think the answer to that is to tell yourself all women on seeking are hookers or con women.
I think you tell yourself to slow down. Do the shit tests. Get outside opinions on the woman. Make her earn that trust versus just giving it to her. Don't ignore the red flags even though part of your brain that wants that special woman is telling you to bury them.
The issue I have with calling all the women on seeking con artists and hookers, and there is no doubt there are many there, is that you miss out on the very best women there.
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02-10-24 02:52 #5457
Posts: 596Originally Posted by FilthyBeaver [View Original Post]
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02-09-24 03:12 #5456
Posts: 364I just think it's complicated
I'm not arguing or upset. A girl once told me that the appeal of the site is the lack of pretense. Everyone knows why they're there. Girls are there for "help" in whatever form that means, usually money. We're there for, well, whatever. I'm seeing more profiles that say, "I'm open to what happens over time. " That's girl code for "I'm ready to bag a rich husband. " Not on a typical 21 yr old profile but late twenties / early 30's who's biological clocks are ticking, family or social pressure, etc. A good friend with two gorgeous daughters once told me that he taught his girls early on that there are nice rich guys and nice poor guys, so they may as well get a rich one. My point is there are girls using that site as a (mostly traditional) dating sight. Probably not in your 18-23 yr old filter range but I am seeing this in profiles of more, mature (readers older) girls. There are just too many reasons to generalize. I will certainly concede that if tye sugar disappears the chance of them stuck around is close to nil, at best maybe they give you the occasional sympathy bang but they're definitely shopping for another reliable source in the meantime time.
Originally Posted by AmericanPi [View Original Post]
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02-08-24 15:37 #5455
Posts: 596Originally Posted by FilthyBeaver [View Original Post]
I own a business that practically everybody in the world needs one or multiple times and I'd do her "favors" when necessary.
The girl who talked about getting married would have stuck around if I were willing to as the bigger prize are all my assets not a few hundred bucks when we screw.
You realize those things are what I'm talking about right? You're just using different words and different forms of currency.
Look I'm not judging anyone on this forum (yes I am). I just think it's important to be lucid and clear eyed about what's what. Pretense isn't free. The minute you start living in a narrative that doesn't map to reality is the minute you expose yourself.
I'm not saying seeking girls are conmen, but this is how conmen work. Nobody ever thinks they're a mark. And not all conmen are awful horrible people. I've known many girls who do this kind of work (yes it's work; not all work requires a pay stub or a time sheet) for the best reasons including needing to take care of ailing parents, kids at home, or to fund a business venture so they can stop sucking old dick for 3000 dollars a month. But strip away all the embellishments and at the end of the day 99 percent of this reduces to an older guy exchanging financial resources of some sort to a girl trading her her youth and beauty in the form of sexual exchange. I'm ok with it. Just don't delude yourself into thinking the extra variables change the equation.
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02-07-24 22:47 #5454
Posts: 364Point taken
I can agree with most but I saw a girl for a few months and never gave her a dime. I own a business that practically everybody in the world needs one or multiple times and I'd do her "favors" when necessary. I cut it off with her because she was bat shit crazy.
Feelings do develop on both sides, should they instantly disappear when the quid pro you is gone? Depends. 90% of the time I'd say yes but the girl who talked about getting married would have stuck around if I were willing to as the bigger prize are all my assets not a few hundred bucks when we screw.
Some just want a good time at a nice restaurant or a show that guys their age just can't do. I've heard this more than once. That doesn't mean we're monogamous and I've never made such a request / demand because I'm realistic about what this is. But when they start crying during a breakup it's more than a transaction.
I had a girl seem to take genuine pleasure in breaking it off with me, she knew I was emotional invested. It was early in my seeking career and she did it in a very public place so I couldn't go nuts (not my style anyway). Aside from that I get what I want, real, fake, delusional, etc. From that site.
Originally Posted by AmericanPi [View Original Post]
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02-07-24 15:59 #5453
Posts: 364I don't understand the point
I won't argue that money is their primary reason for being there. After that there are a million reasons they stick around. I don't see the point of that entire paragraph.
Originally Posted by VanessasClient [View Original Post]
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02-07-24 15:53 #5452
Posts: 596Originally Posted by VanessasClient [View Original Post]
- she's my girlfriend now.
- I still give her money / gifts but if I didn't we'd still be a thing.
- we bareback but she only does it with me.
- she loves old guys way more than guys her age. They are sexually better. She even told me so.
Don't worry. Delusion exists on the girl side too. Maybe even more!!
- this isn't sex work.
- I know what I'm worth (no. You don't sweetie. That's why you have to insist it. Because nobody believes it. It's less than you think.)
- A man on this site, of all sites, will pay me generously for platonic friendship.
- I'm his only sexual interest right now. I've got him down pat.
- he travels so much because of work.
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02-07-24 08:01 #5451
Posts: 89All of these girls have money at the top of their list. If their motivation was fame instead of fortune, then they'd be spending their time practicing for American Idol, instead of posting profiles in Seeking. And if their motivation was sex instead of money, they'd be out at a bar every night, hitting on as many men as possible, or posting profiles on Ashley Madison instead. Money always comes first. That being said, there's absolutely no logic in the argument that if these girls are willing to shag strangers for money, then there's no way they'd be willing to go to dinner with them for money, or give them a legit, clothed massage for money, or anything else that involves less physical contact than sex. In no universe does that claim hold water. Now there may be some things they aren't willing to do for money, such as commit an armed bank robbery. But if it's any lesser act than sex, of course they are going to be willing to do it, because it's less intense and doesn't require as much effort on their part, and they are still getting paid. And it's certainly possible that they also dislike their customers who pay them for non sexual services.
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02-07-24 02:02 #5450
Posts: 364We may go back and forth a while
Met what I thought was a 9 from her pics. Turns how she weighed at least double and had so many track marks on her arms I could beilve she was walking.
Met a girl who demanded to be compensated for a meet and greet dinner. When I asked my she said that's her rate and her time is valuable. Lmmfao.
Met another girl who was at least 10 yrs older than her pics and was looking for seed money to start an enema clinic. I can't make this shit up, I'm not that creative. Also wouldn't stop complaining about how hard it is to survive my my city but had no job and no intentions of getting a job.
Met a girl and told her how happy I was generally with what I've been able to pull from the site. She asked me why I would say such a thing and blocked me.
Originally Posted by Gfefan [View Original Post]
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02-06-24 18:48 #5449
Posts: 242Few more
Few more from my SBs.
I will buy your used unwashed panties for 100 EUR.
My wife is out of town. Can I bring my 3 year old to our date?
You look like my wife's sister. I always wanted to fuck her. You are the closest.
I have an office intern I can bring along for threesome.
Seriously. Some are hilarious. Some are outright stupid.
But, my SB and I have fun discussing these.
I have had a potential SB show up stoned for meet and greet. Nope. Walked away.
Another wanted to bring her employer's baby (she worked as babysitter) to our 2nd date which was supposed to be non platonic. She seemed decent atmeet and greet and then went downhill with that one request.
Originally Posted by FilthyBeaver [View Original Post]
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02-06-24 02:41 #5448
Posts: 364There are some complete douche bags out there. One of the reasons I like seeking so much is to hear the stories some girls have. "You must prove to that you're worth my time," "I only want anal sex and I'll pay you 10 k for it," "I can only see you for lunch a hotel because my wife might find out. ".
That must be music to the ears of some 20 yr old trying to reconcile what she's got herself into.
Originally Posted by Foolish [View Original Post]
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02-05-24 18:08 #5447
Posts: 119Originally Posted by AmericanPi [View Original Post]
Originally Posted by Gfefan [View Original Post]Originally Posted by NoBuglyFitches [View Original Post]
F.
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02-05-24 12:15 #5446
Posts: 6444Browsing
Originally Posted by NoBuglyFitches [View Original Post]
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02-05-24 07:36 #5445
Posts: 59Originally Posted by NoBuglyFitches [View Original Post]Originally Posted by FilthyBeaver [View Original Post]
Originally Posted by FilthyBeaver [View Original Post]
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02-04-24 18:41 #5444
Posts: 242Thats what I do
I do the same. Lurk around, find profiles that interest me, make a secret note.
Originally Posted by FilthyBeaver [View Original Post]