General Info

[The Wizard]

SunDevil,

My family is from Mexico and yes the women generally are more attracted to older guys. The place my family is from is very "old school" in its customs. It is not uncommon for men in their 30s and 40s to date women in their late teens. Although illegal here, some older men have married 15yr olds and it is not frowned upon in those areas.

It might be different in the bigger cities. My uncle knows several young girls who are always turning down good looking guys and big-money drug dealers in their town. The girls say they would rather wait for a serious older man, who won't leave them.

I think they have a strong fear about getting divorced so they pass on the youthful players and settle for the older men. Most are still virgins! (At least they claim to be.)

[Sun Devil]

I am realizing that age and maturity are an advantage for men in Mexico, as opposed to the US. Is it just my imagination but it seems to me that Mexican women apparently are more attracted to guys who are in their 40s or older than those in their 20s. They seem to find maturity as a more attractive quality than youthfullness and looks.

[Sun Devil]

Thanks for the reply. Out of curiosity, has she introduced you to her relatives? If so, how has she explained on how she met you? In my opinion, no Mexican woman would want to admit that she is working as a prostitutes to her relatives. Some have told me that they say to the people taking care of their children while they're out working, such as their sister or mother, that they are working in restaurants or factories. Therefore, the question on how she met you would be an issue. She definitely cannot say that she met you as a client prior to you becoming her boyfriend.

[DiabloMactavish]

Somehow I missed Sundevil's post, so sorry this is so late.

I will echo what the other guys are saying - don't fall for the "my grandma's sick routine", because, amazingly, you will suddenly discover that one member of the family after another is on their deathbed just about every other day.

I hooked up with a provider about 15 days ago, and she is living with me right now, slated to go back home to Guadalajara this Thursday.

Anyhow, aside from the night I paid for her to leave the club with me, she has received no more than about US $60 in cash.

Most nights she has made me dinner, I paid for the groceries. She has then gone out to work at the bar where I met her - but she is no longer doing "salidas" (she says).

I don't really care if she does or not, frankly. She comes home at 2 -3 AM and we make love, then again in the morning.

Three times, she has played "hooky" from the bar, and on those nights, I have given her about $15 - about half of what she earns on an average night hustling drinks - she "chips in" the other half (ie gives it up not to go to work).

One morning she asked to borrow $2 and that evening she made a big show of paying it back.

I told her flat out at the beginning - I like you, I like having sex with you - but I am not rich enough to pay for you like this... if you like me then let's hang out and I will treat you exactly like my girlfriend, because you will be my girlfriend as far as I am concerned.

And she has been living with me ever since (she had been sharing an apartment with some other providers.)

I took her out to a very nice dinner on (US) thanksgiving night, I've cooked dinner for her, she's gone to a couple movies with me, and in exchange she's cooked me dinner, scolded my house maid who is now cleaning up 10 times better than before, and oh yeah, have the best damn sex of my life.

Luckily because I am cheap, I have a little dumpy apartment which backs up my "I'm not rich" credibility. :P

[J Boy]

Hi everyone,

I am considering buying a home in the Lake Chalupa area. Is it near any of the cities that have forums here? Can any of you give me some insight on retiring in Mexico? I am divorced, 55 years old and live alone.

Thanks.

[Mill Just]

SunDevil,

Just thought that I'd add my two cents here. I've lived in Mexico for awhile and I've learned the customs first hand (sometimes the hard way) with regards to dating and relationships.

The typical Mexican woman will require you, as the man, to "declare" your intentions for her. (The words in Spanish is "Declarar"). You literally have to ask her, "will you be my girlfriend?" If she says yes, then you're her boyfriend. If you don't ask, your relationship will go nowhere and you will always be "just friends". Things may vary from person to person, but this has been the case in EVERY instance that I've experienced or heard about.

Working girls tend to be a lot more forward, so it doesn't surprise me that this girl is working you hard and staking her claim to a man who treats her with respect. She probably sees you as her ticket to a better life and she won't give you up lightly.

I recommend that you make it very clear to her that you don't want a serious relationship. Mexican women are very jealous and tempermental. I've seen working girls get into bloody fist fights with other girls (and sometimes the man themselves) over clients. Imagine how bad it could get if somebody takes away her "last chance" for a better life?

She might have only the best intentions when it comes to a potential relationship with you, but unless you want a serious relationship with her you should tell her the truth ASAP. And, yes, as Out of the Game said, don't hand out any extra money for her rent or food or bills unless you wantto be her SugarDaddy.

Take care and always have fun....

[Sun Devil]

Thanks guys, I appreciate the advice. I'll just play it by ear and see what happens.

[Prokofiev]

Devil,

Novio can mean friend, boyfriend or fiancé depending who she is and HOW she sez it. OOTGame is probably right that she wants to claim you as a steady customer and it is partly a joke . . . but a pleasant one.

On the other hand she, like millions of Mexicanas, might like a gringo husband who has a good job, a college degree and US citizenship for herself and her children.

I wouldnt jump to conclusions either way. If you like her, ask her for a date - without paying her. Consider it an adventure. If you are "naive" about Mexican cultural habits, you won't be after meeting her parents, grandparents and 6 older brothers.

As to being embarrassed about her occupation, introducing her to friends and family as "Hey Mom, Dad. I want you to meet Maria. She's a hooker!" . . . well that just doesn't fly in ANY culture. Trust me . . .

You Friend -P

[OutoftheGame]

Sundevil,

All it means is that she has claimed you as hers. She is telling you what she thinks you want to hear and to make you not want to go with other girls which in turn will cost her money.

She will call you her boyfriend around her friends to make you feel special. And unless you are not paying her for any services you should be smart enough to realize that it is all a game.

The good thing is that it sounds like you don't have these type of feelings for her except to be a nice guy. So if she gives you good service and you enjoy her time than let her say what she wants but don't take it seriously. On the other hand if you are looking to see other girls I would tell her that you can't be her boyfriend but you can be a special friend and that you enjoy the time that you have with her but will want to look for other friends sometimes to.

These girls will do alot to make a guy not go with other girls. And no matter what she says do not ever give her money for rent or any of that other shit.

[Sun Devil]

What does it entail to be a Mexican woman's novio?

Being a rather young person who just graduated from college a couple of months ago and somewhat naive to the whole gamut of Latin American cultural values, I have no idea how to react to the fact that one of the providers that I have been seeing has called me her novio and she, my novia. As a rule, I have tried to be nice and romantic around her, like saying bulls*** stuff and giving her small presents, and my actions could have prompted her to think that I wanted to be her boyfriend. In addition, she indicated to me that, if any of my friends asked me what line of work she is in, I should tell them that she is a bilingual secretary of a large business firm. She is definitely embarrassed with regards to her occupation.

First of all, should I be flattered? I don't want to offend her and insult her by declining this title. She has already declared me to be her boyfriend among her workmates, perhaps out of sheer possessiveness. I find Mexican women to be generous and have good hearts, and I don't want to hurt her feelings.

Second, does this mean that she wants me to start buying her presents, giving her my undivided attention, paying her rent or living with her? Does this entail that I should start acting jealous while she continues working?

Can anybody help me who has gone through this route by providing some advice on what to expect and how to react? Thanks in advance.

[Prokofiev]

Great,

I have a Franklin "Bookman" BES-1840A. There is a newer model that is much the same and was highly recommended by someone else. Costs around $100, I think. I use it as a dictionary. Much lighter. Will pronounce english and spanish - in a crappy robot voice. That feature is more useful for a Spanish speaker needing to say English words. You can learn to pronounce Spanish in about 1 day. The rules are perfectly clear, unlike our language.

[One Great Man]

Hi guys:

I read reports on electronic translators on one of these posts. Unfortunately, I don't remember which one, and I didn't copy the brand names down! If anyone has suggestions, I'd appreciate a post at This1greatman@yahoo.com. This would be of benefit to all us mongers.

[DiabloMactavish]

I had fun in Matamoros, but it was about 5 years ago. I don't think they have a Boy's Town set up, more like just several bars in a row.

[Octatron]

Hey Fellow Mongers

As for the Border towns. What is everybodys favorite in terms of the cheapest.

I've been to TJ, NL, and Juarez, and for me it's just getting out of hand. So since I'm doing another cross country trip I thought I would try a new town.

Happy Mongering.

[DiabloMactavish]

> I had a bunch of sex toys so it was a bit embarassing

reminds me of a time when I got stopped and searched at a checkpoint by soldiers looking for drugs and weapons and one of them opened up a paper bag that had about 25 condoms, lube and a vibrator.

I had a very pretty GF as passenger (who had no idea about the bag's contents) and the soldier opened it, gasped and blushed, looked at the girl and quickly stuffed the bag back behind the seat where he found it.

That ended the inspection.