Havana

[El Rey De Pollo]

Sorry, but if you're not a smart-ass, I don't know what is. I have spend more than a year in Cuba and you keep telling me that my information and help is wrong.

Fine with me. I should have stopped trying to help you after your first arrogant response to the help that other experienced Cuba-travellers tried to give you. Instead of wasting my time on a guy whos pattern of discussion is like this:

- Hi, I've never been to Cuba. What's it like?
- It's like this. Here's how you get the best out of it....
- Naah, don't really belive that.

So, If there are experienced Cuba-travellers on these boards who you have not yet pissed on, I hope you'll be able to get some help before going. Because you sound like you really need it.

I for one am gonna spend my time helping out guys who appreciate being helped and who don't act like they know everything about a country they've never set foot it (and who have a different opinion on how to treat Cuban girls...)

So no more replies from me.

[Smily59]

Thank you for appreciating my report.

Water Boy Questions:

I´ld rate theChicas 7-8, 18 – 26 years old, not chubby one definitely petite, b-c cup, morena – negrita (I´m not that familiar with the classificationsystem they were fair to darker skinned). Yes I´ld go back to Cuba, although it will be HAV and provincias next time.

IT:

Yes, 25-35 CUC TLN, did BBBJ, didn´t ask for CIM, anal.

Beersteery:

When saying Turquino on the second floor I´m not talking about the disco at the top of the Habana Libre.

Suerte Smily

[Smokers Rule]

Sir,

I seek only truth; I feel that, though well-intentioned, some of your info is questionable given what I have read here and elsewhere. You should not take honest inquiry as a personal affront. I have read a lot about Cuba, and I will continue to read more. Your contributions are both useful and appreciated. However, some of what you have to say does not square with what I have read and what common sense tells me should be true, so I question it. Nothing personal against you.

Regarding the questions that you typed out but did not intend for me to answer (?), I will go ahead and anser them:

1) 1CUC = $1.08, but I round up to $1.25 for easier math.

2) I have traveled extensively throughout Latin America and the Caribbean...I've been to 7 Latin American countries in 2008, and intend to visit 3 more next month.

3) My perusal of this board and others (unmentionable here) indicates that 100 CUC is reasonable for TLN. I'm not dumb; I realize that many chicas won't do TLN for any money. They have kids, parents, reputation, scared of police, etc. I was merely using this as my pricing example. From what I have read, few Cubanas bring in 100 CUC for ST, though there are exceptions. In any case, I reiterate my assertion that, based on my experience and what I have read on the boards, Cuba is not expensive.

There is a recurring trend on this board and on others: Two people think they know everything, so they post back and forth telling each other why they're wrong. This evolves into what Jackson calls "serial antagonism."

I do not mean to antagonise you in the slightest; I'm merely seeking accurate information. I readily admit that I know nothing about Cuba first-hand...I have never been there!

I think we should raise the level of discourse on this board. Name calling (see: "smart ass" and "cleverboy") belongs on the schoolyards. We are adults.

That said, I will reiterate that I appreciate your contributions to this board.

Believe whatever you want. I'm trying to help you out, buddy, but you honestly sound like a smart ass. Well, no, actually like an idiot. Where do you come off questionning the helpful tips I'm trying to give you? You've never set foot in the country and you're telling me that I'm giving you wrong advice?!?!?

3 questions, cleverboy:

1. Do you know the currency rate of the CUC?
2. Have you been much around in the Caribean or in Central America?
3. Where did you get the idea that the 100 (or 30 or 50 ot whatever) is for TLN? You may have luck and find that, but it's not the norm. When a girl quotes you 80 or 100 in a club or on the street, she is not talking about staying for the night.

You actually don't need to answer them, since I kinda lost interest in you.

Have a nice trip. You allready know all there is to know, so what could go wrong really?

[El Rey De Pollo]

And my counter-replies . . .


100 CUC is not expensive for TLN. Try getting a TLN from a decent chica in Brazil or Argentina or Chile or any of the biggie South American countries for 100 CUC. Good luck. In fact, please tell me where it is easy to find TLNs for 100 CUC...I'd like to go there

That said, I plan on doing my work and paying in the 20-50 range, which is reasonable and still a great deal.

By the way...a TLN in Sweden can run you anywhere from $750 to $2000.


I appreciate your confidence, but I don't believe the 90% figure. I don't think you're going to find anyone to confirm it.


This attitude will get you in trouble in the Caribbean my friend

Believe whatever you want. I'm trying to help you out, buddy, but you honestly sound like a smart ass. Well, no, actually like an idiot. Where do you come off questionning the helpful tips I'm trying to give you? You've never set foot in the country and you're telling me that I'm giving you wrong advice?!?!?

3 questions, cleverboy:

1. Do you know the currency rate of the CUC?
2. Have you been much around in the Caribean or in Central America?
3. Where did you get the idea that the 100 (or 30 or 50 ot whatever) is for TLN? You may have luck and find that, but it's not the norm. When a girl quotes you 80 or 100 in a club or on the street, she is not talking about staying for the night.

You actually don't need to answer them, since I kinda lost interest in you.

Have a nice trip. You allready know all there is to know, so what could go wrong really?

[Smokers Rule]

And my counter-replies . . .

If you find that 100 cuc is not expensive (and often for one or two hours - not a full night - and often not GFE either, especially if the girl is picked up at a disco), you must be used to mongering in Sweden... I highly suggest you don't ruin Cuba for everybody else by paying 100 cuc to any girl while there.

100 CUC is not expensive for TLN. Try getting a TLN from a decent chica in Brazil or Argentina or Chile or any of the biggie South American countries for 100 CUC. Good luck. In fact, please tell me where it is easy to find TLNs for 100 CUC...I'd like to go there

That said, I plan on doing my work and paying in the 20-50 range, which is reasonable and still a great deal.

By the way...a TLN in Sweden can run you anywhere from $750 to $2000.

You don't need to have my replies confirmed. I have spend about 1½ year in Cuba in total. My recent visit was one month ago and lasted 6 weeks. I have met thousands of Cuban girls, and have been to just about every street and disco in Havana and suburbs.

I appreciate your confidence, but I don't believe the 90% figure. I don't think you're going to find anyone to confirm it.

That said, please change your attitude towards the girls. If you meet a anice girl, you're an idiot if you don't help her in any way you can.

This attitude will get you in trouble in the Caribbean my friend

[El Rey De Pollo]

The cops will not ask you for a tsright bride. They all say that it their birthday and they do not want any hassle with you or anubody. So they say it my birthday how about a birthday present. I have given a couple of birthday presents on many of trips.

Yeah, it's actually so funny. Had a first-time Cuba visitor visit me a month back and I had told him about the birthday-thing. He couldn't help himself from laughing everytime these guys said it.

Funny thing is, on a number of occassions I would argue a bit with them, refuse to haven done anything wrong and by the time they realize I'm not Joe Sucker confused in Cuba and have given me my papers back and loosened up and are about to say goodbye as I role up the window, they say 'Ohh, amigo, and today is my birthday!'.

"Feliz cumpleaño," I reply as the window shuts and I take off.

Trying to get a bribe as a small token for not handing you an unwarranted ticket - AFTER they have realized they're not getting a bribe. I love Cuba...

[El Cubanito]

The cops will not ask you for a tsright bride. They all say that it their birthday and they do not want any hassle with you or anubody. So they say it my birthday how about a birthday present. I have given a couple of birthday presents on many of trips.

[El Rey De Pollo]

My Two Cents on TG's post:

I only partially agree with your statement. Knowing how to work things in Cuba is definetly a MUST. And speaking excellent spanish is a huge plus. (Although translators may be used.)

I disagree with your statement that "you are home free." There is NO magic bullet. (If there is one - please inform me.)

You are right. I put that into wrong words. You are never home free. Even seasoned Cuban travellers will never be.

BUT - Combination of good Spanish skills (and I mean being able to say anything you want to say, perhaps not in beautifully constructed sentences, but getting anything accross) and intense knowledge of working girls, police, male hustlers, taxis, doormen, casa owners, guards, friends, foes, etcetera will put you in a situation where you can cruise the streets in a form of confidence that you will know what to do when a situation arises.

But home free, no. Wrong words.

[El Rey De Pollo]

Let the chica work out the bribe with the cop. You end up paying of course. They will get out of your face for 10 CUC

10? Not in the parts of Havana i stay. 20 if Im lucky, but 30 seems to be the norm for 'not seeing' the girl you are walking with.

When were you in Havana, Beersterry?

[El Rey De Pollo]

i don't care if the girls pay bribes.

what about us foreigners paying bribes?

i thought the general rule in cuba was: "never offer a bribe to a cuban police officer" this could get you in big legal trouble.

what are others thoughts on this?

things have changed water boy. the general rule used to be like that. this was in the days when socialism and unity still superceeded greed. today, it is vice versa. i have never paid a bribe until my last two trips. then 2-3 bribes on my previous trip and 5-7 on my trip a month ago. by far the most to traffic cops.

the new general rule is like this:

if you have not done anything wrong: act like you know cuba. refuse to accept a fine. tell him you have time and will go with him to the station. he will let you go.

if you have done something: slip him a 10, 20 or 30. 10 is for running a yellow/red light, 30 is for serious speeding.

[BeersTerry]

Let the chica work out the bribe with the cop. You end up paying of course. They will get out of your face for 10 CUC

[Member #4167]

The cop was looking to get paid, the girl wasn't going to make any more money, until she paid him. Girls who pay off the cops get to work, those who don't pay, they don't work.

I don't care if the girls pay bribes.

What about us Foreigners Paying bribes?

I thought the general rule in cuba was: "never offer a bribe to a cuban police officer" This could get you in big legal trouble.

What are others thoughts on this?

[Member #4167]

It's easy to find girls. No. It's a lifetime study to master the ways of Cuba. After 7-8 trips I am still trying to learn.

This is true. I have only had 2-3 months on various trips to Cuba.

Yet, I find myself still not knowing the ropes and STILL frustrated by the hassles and hard work most of the time.

Here is my take.

My comments in this post apply to the sub-100 CUC semi-pro/non-pro market segment. If you are willing to pay 100 CUC you can more easily get model-quality in Havana and Cfgos Cuba. You can bed a cubana for 100CUC, but you will still have to jump through hoops to get her into a casa particular.

Cuba Factors:

1. The Quality/Cost/EaseOfGetting the sub-100 CUC Girls varies from city to city.

2. Even when you get a good city - the Quality/Cost/EaseOfGetting varies from day-to-day. Some days there is a flood. Other days a drought. If you aren't getting good results, move on to the next city.

3. Police enforcement of the jiniteras and rules/restrictions on getting a cubana into a Casa Particular varies from casa-to-casa from city-to-city and from day-to-day. Mastery of the intricacies of this aspect of the mongering game is the most crucial to your mongering success.

4. Some days and in some localities the only provider on the market is an old worn out skank for 40CUC. Other times you can luck out with a beauty for 20-30 CUC - although these times are few and far between. Sure the average wage is $20/month in cuba. One of the lowest wages in the world. The prices in cuba are not low as a result of this.

My Two Cents on TG's post:

If you speak Spanish AND know how to work things in Cuba, you are home free.

I only partially agree with your statement. Knowing how to work things in Cuba is definetly a MUST. And speaking excellent spanish is a huge plus. (Although translators may be used.)

I disagree with your statement that "you are home free." There is NO magic bullet. (If there is one - please inform me.)

Like everything else in Cuba, "How Things Work" tend to vary from city to city. And they vary from day to day. And lastly they vary from provider to provider.

I think you are home free if you happen to be in a place and time where the Cuba Factors 1 - 4 above, are also in your favor. please correct me if I am wrong.

That said, I love Cuba. I would never ever take a trip to Cuba just to monger. If you do, you will be shocked at the amount of hazzle you will have to go trough and the number of girls you will loose on the way home or in your entrance.

One of the best statements I have read that sums up the truth about Cuba.

I love Cuba too, but there are far better places to monger for ease and cost. There are many other 3rd world countries where it is cheaper and much much more hassle-free.

If you want low-cost mongering and are willing to put up with the hassles, here is my advice:stay at home and get a girlfriend.

Don't expect to go to cuba to find hoards of attractive women eager to have sex with you for 10-20CUC. This cuba no longer exists. Go to Cuba if you want to see and experience the country, with mongering as your secondary agenda.

Question For The Members of The Forum:

The reason my posting here is to share knowledge as well is to TEST my knowledge of the best way to succeed in cuba. It is true that "It's a lifetime study to master the ways of Cuba."

Help me to gain mastery by correcting me if I am wrong in my above statements.

[El Rey De Pollo]

The cop was looking to get paid, the girl wasn't going to make any more money, until she paid him. Girls who pay off the cops get to work, those who don't pay, they don't work.

I am aware. But pussy plus bribe can fuck up any budget.

There was a huge outbreak of std's in Habana about 3-4 years ago.

And there's an even bigger one going on right now. So big that it's even officially recognized and young people have been encouraged to go for tests. Probably one of the reasons why many girls refuse to do bbbjs.

[El Rey De Pollo]

O.K.....my 2 cents

I've never had a bj with condom in cuba. Had plenty in Colombia with condom.
I have caught a terrible itch though.

Sorry about the itch.

I don't mean to question the quality of chicas you are getting over there, 'cause I have no idea. But I find that there is a direct link between the looks of the girl and her willingness to do bbbj.

I agree that - quality taken aside - anybody can get a bbbj a day in Cuba.