Lima

[Steppin Razor]

This last day of R & R in Lima got off to a bad start as I chose to go to the Windsor Banos Turcos in San Isidro. From the outside and in the lobby, this place looked way too legit. But, looks can be deceiving, can't they? Since I was already inside, I would just have to see for myself. The first thing I saw were a lot of old, wrinkled naked guys. Ugh! The masseuses all wore clinical uniforms and some of them were pretty hot looking. One in particular, her name was Maria (I believe), looked like a Latin Dolly Parton. This was an honest-to-goodness legitimate Turkish bath. All the massage rooms were curtained and signs everywhere said silence. If any monkey business went on, everyone can hear it. This place was that quiet. Reluctantly, I went in to the eucalyptus scented steam room (I was beginning to really enjoy this aspect of Lima's banos Turcos) and just relaxed. After showering, they assigned me a young, flat-chested masseuse who was all business (and not the good kind). How boring! After my second legitimate massage on this trip (a record for me), I had to leave this place. This was when I got in to a cab and told him to take me to Lince and the King Spa on Arequipa Street.

Right when I entered the lobby of King Spa, I knew I was where I wanted to be. The neon sign out front gave the establishment a garish, raunchy look, which coincidentally was how the masseuses dressed when I first saw them in the cafeteria area. Some of them were practically falling out of their tops. I just love that look. There was no ambiguity about the intentions of this place. The smart thing to do was to wait a little while to see all of the girls before a choice was made, so I waited in the sauna and TV room while keeping an eye on the personnel. During this hiatus, waiters walked around to all the guys (about 20) and gave everyone a free beverage. How nice I thought, but when I drank it I nearly spit it out (but I did not because that would have been rude). This drink had the consistency of spit and sort of tasted like it. Yucko! However, all the other dudes seemed to have enjoyed it. Anyways, I decided to choose a masseuse who was built like the proverbial brick shithouse. Her name was Yanet and her performance was better than average but not great. Again, like at Lion Spa, we had a small massage table to play on and it was not that fun. Troca, Cucardas, and La Nene all offered small twin sized beds, while Lion and King Banos Turcos had small massage tables. Only the Finnish Spa in Lince supplied a good sized bed for the body smacking festivities. I guess the thing to do would be to get a suite or apartment with a large bed and then enjoy carryout, which was my plan for tonight.

When I returned to Miraflores, there was some big public dance going on in the park. It was rather pleasant to interact with the locals. After a very fine dinner (albeit a little pricey) at the Cafe de la Paz, I returned to my suite at the Maria Luisa and and prepared for my last night in Lima. My first sojourn in to Tequila Rocks last week was not very successful. However, the reputation of this famous establishment beckoned me. What kind of a monger am I if I don't partake in such an honored venue? The first half hour here was not too promising as this place was full of tourists. Who am I to complain, right? Walking around the place, I noticed a girl with the biggest cleavage I have ever seen. It was so big, she used it as a purse, where she stored her cell phone, money, and other items. I said hello, we spoke for a while, struck a deal, and walked back to my hotel. Yessica looked a little older outside of the dark disco and in the brighter suite lights, she looked a little heavier. Even while clothed, I can tell her chest was all real. When she got naked, I was truly impressed and immensely turned on. I had to take a picture of this. The amazing thing was, she encouraged it with lots of posing. When the action started, she allowed for video! We did all the positions in all the holes. She even allowed me to stop to switch from hand held camera to setting up to record the wide angle. It was great video, which I would post but it gets to much of my face. Maybe one day I will post the photos. You can see her yourself at TR because nobody there has a bosom like her. Yessica proved to be a great way to end my trip in Lima.

I want to thank everyone here in this forum for providing all the great information I used to research for this fabulous vacation and I hope the field reports I have provided will help future travelers in this incredible country. Any hobbyist, who really enjoys what he does, cannot miss out on an opportunity to sample this magnificent country.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I would suggest that the author or another Forum Member consider posting a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please Click Here for more information.

[Albert Punter]

Confirm that is website for this hotel.
Maybe they didn't pay for hosting ....

Anyhow, for those interested, this is my report about this hotel
http://www.internationalsexguide.inf...9&postcount=82

I'm curious to know what the spanish version of "no shit' is ?


By the way the link to the website doesn't work either...no shit!

[Polvo]

To whom it may concern,
The is no address for Lions Spa. I wish the information given had more details.
Can you get laid at this place, and how much is the whole thing?

Av. Arenales 2024 (Cuadra 20). Yes, depends on negotiation but expect to spend about S/.200.

David33's link is a superior information source.

Suerte!

Polvo

[Black Page]

Are there lockers to leave one´s bags at Lima airport? This will determine whether or not Trocadero is a feasible option for me on my departure Wednesday night.

Yes, at the exit of national arrivals.
I left one big bag (too early to check-in next flight) and my laptop with papers and stuff. Nothing disappeared.

[Member #4351]

...and others:

http://www.perutops.com/foro-relax/f...splay.php?f=12

[Prokofiev]

Yes, there are lockers at the airport = a window service which charges by the hour, not self-service lockers. I did this upon leaving the country in that I had a 6.5 hour lay-over between Cusco and my departing flight. Also note many of the US airlines do not open their services until around 7pm - so early check-in is impossible and the locker service is a must.

El Trocadero is open from 3pm. I was there a little before 4pm and there were plenty of girls. Remember that only 10% of El Salvaje is at least 20 chicas. SO even if the percentage is low, you should not have a problem finding an interesting woman or two to spend time with. This is your best way (IMHO) to kill a few hours prior to leaving Lima.

[Samu Ray]

To whom it may concern,
The is no address for Lions Spa. I wish the information given had more details.
Can you get laid at this place, and how much is the whole thing?

[Member #2041]

Are there lockers to leave one´s bags at Lima airport? This will determine whether or not Trocadero is a feasible option for me on my departure Wednesday night.

[Member #4351]

It may be open, but it also may be empty of most of the younger girls. Unless things have changed, the girls generally began arriving around 5 and started packing up around 9. All depending on how many clients were around. Cucardas is not that far, and not in Lima central. Depending on traffic it is around 10 minutes further and about two dollars more in taxi fare, than the troc from the airport. It is interesting to note that the Troc has begun advertising in Mundo anuncio:

VAMOS AL TROCADERO DEL CALLAO - Lima Metropolitana
TOMAS UNA COMBI ANTIGUA DETRAS DE PLAZA 2DE MAYO Y PREGUNTAS POR EL SITIO..EN EL TROCA PAGAS 13POR TIKET Y DE 20 A 30 LA CHICA QTE GUSTE..HAY ECUATORIANAS Y CHILENAS..BLANCAS ALTAS NEGRAS CHATAS ETC..TODO SERVICIO..HAY SEGURIDAD..TE LO LAVAN CONDON GRATIS TODAS CON SU CARNET DE SANIDAD Y SON UNOS HEMBRONES...ANIMATE CHOCHE..PASA LA VOZ Y NO TE DEJES ENGAÑAR..YO ME VOY AHORA..CHAU..NOS VEMOS EN EL TROKA

[Black Page]

Black Page,

As I have said before, IMHO Pizza Street and Tequila should be alternatives of last resort. I think they both suck. As far as the Troc goes, it is worth noting that it is only open from around 5 or 6 in the afternoon to around 9 to 10 at night, so that nobody with an afternoon lay over ends up going all the way there for nothing. An alternative would be to go a little further away from the airport to Las Cucardas which is always open.

I repeat: El Troca is open all days from 3pm to 10pm. I am sure because I asked to the girl.
Las Cucardas is in the centre and, according to what I read, is much smaller than El Trocadero.
If I am in the airport in the afternoon, for me there's no better place to go than El Troca: only 20 mins and 10 soles away by taxi, 40 girls or so of any age and shape.

PS: anybody reads the report by Tungurahua first; it depicts the place atmosphere at best.

[Member #4351]

Black Page,

As I have said before, IMHO Pizza Street and Tequila should be alternatives of last resort. I think they both suck. As far as the Troc goes, it is worth noting that it is only open from around 5 or 6 in the afternoon to around 9 to 10 at night, so that nobody with an afternoon lay over ends up going all the way there for nothing. An alternative would be to go a little further away from the airport to Las Cucardas which is always open.

[Kuttappan]

This is why an apartment is much better than most of the hotels. (Suites Apart Hotel is an exception, can bring in more than one). Most won´t let more than one girl in at a time; María Luisa is famous for this policy. Sushilover is paying $35 a night for a nice apt. on Pardo.

I am taking your advice and working with apartment club peru for our stay in Miraflores.

Lima Busy ...thank you for posting that hotel review. It was funny.

[Black Page]

I've been in Lima for only two days, always busy with work.
I carefully read the forum (RTFF first!) before my trip. I can share my impressions about two places: Pizza Alley at Miraflores and El Trocadero.

At night at PA I saw only 5-6 girls, nothing to remember. I can hardly share the good memories of some previous posters about this place.

A few days after, I had a 6 hours stop over in the airport of Lima between two "connecting" flights.
Well, I thought to check El Trocadero in this time, since it is very near the airport. The main reason was the report by Tungurahua, MY HERO for all his posts in South America. If he likes a place, I am sure it is worth a visit.

Tung, where are you my friend?? Reading your posts is always breathtaking to me. You write as an artist. Why dont you publish a book with your memories?
Your reports about Quito opened a world to me. It was before my first visit in South America. If you only could imagine how much me and I sure others owe to you....

Closed this emphatical tribute to the Master Tungurahua, let's be back to El Troca.

Read the report by Tung of about one year ago. It depicts EXACTLY the place and its atmosphere.

It is located at Callao (see the List by World Traveler 69) on Av. Argentina, esq. Av. Palacios, 5 minutes from the Minka shopping Center, 20 mins from the airport. Ideal for a quick stop over.

It is in an industrial area, open from 3pm to 10pm. Impossible to go there on foot. Take a taxi, 10 soles from the airport, 8 soles to go back. Entry fee: 15sol.

Plenty of taxis and combis outside. Many ppl short of cash go there on combi. You rich international mongerer can take a taxi.

Many girls available, by far the best you can imagine outside a pricey night club. Some are very young looking (18-19) and very very sexy, some others are older. Many men walking up and down.

I chose a baby face Equadorian girl (19yo). Asked 20sol for FS alll positions (all covered), +20 for anal. No hurry, but think you are spending 5 euro!

For your stop-over in the airport Lima:
- arrive, try to check-in for next flight, leave all your stuff at the luggage deposit near the national arrivals.
- take a taxy (outside! not the expensive ones)
- after 20 mins you are in El Troca. Have fun.
- account other 30 mins to be back to the airport.
- total minimum damage: 10+10 sol for the taxi, 15 for the entry fee, 20-40 for the girl. It is worth a visit!!

PS: forget the ugly girls in Pizza Alley. Go to El Troca :-)

[Member #4351]

It´s more than $35 a night, more like $60. A lot of ISG guys have stayed there, no complaints. But like I said, an apartment is definitely less of a hassle chica-wise.

[Lima Busy]

I'm curious to know what the spanish version of "no shit' is ?

Although I think you would find it more flavorful by adding "huevon" instead of Sherlock!