Other Areas

[Prosal]

You might be able to buy your way into a nightclub in Manhattan or South Beach, but in Eastern Europe, it will take a little more. The okhraniki are more likely to respond to style and class than they are to money. I'm sorry to have to break it to you, but barefoot-in-Birkenstock's, with that old pair of Levi's and the Knick's tank-top just won't cut it. Take that 200 USD you would have spent on a bribe and update your wardrobe, you'll do a lot better.

+1. Style and clothes takes you far in this part of the world, much more than just money. That said, creating a fun atmosphere by paying drinks in club is also mandatory. And you better order the better stuff.

If you go to a late night, face-controlled, high end bar or club in FSU, you will find very good looking women all dressed up with wild partying on their minds, and looking for similarly well-appointed, heavy drinking and generous men with the right "look","witt" and "game" to provide the drinks and company to get the job done. If you can fit in and keep up, is up to you. If not, better stick with prostitutes. You'll be happier that way and save a lot of time and effort.

[Stravinsky]

So I really gave it my best shot, and came up with an Easter goose egg! I tried with the billiard room manager, a gal that spoke very good English, and with some kazakh looking Okron bouncer / doorman / security guy, and my crazy offers of any amount of money, moderate to infinite, all came up unsuccessfully.

You might be able to buy your way into a nightclub in Manhattan or South Beach, but in Eastern Europe, it will take a little more. The okhraniki are more likely to respond to style and class than they are to money. I'm sorry to have to break it to you, but barefoot-in-Birkenstock's, with that old pair of Levi's and the Knick's tank-top just won't cut it. Take that 200 USD you would have spent on a bribe and update your wardrobe, you'll do a lot better.

Poka, paka, pokie-mon, pig in a poke. I don't know Stravinsky, when I listen on the phone, it sure never sounds like they're saying po-ka, it definitely sounds like pa-ka. Spelling? Who writes latin Russian anyway? Only dumb gringos like me.

It's true, it sounds like pah-kah, but it's spelled poka. In Russian, many times the "O" is pronounced as a short A. The trick is, knowing when. Like the old Abbot and Costello routine. . .

But you said "ah"

No, I said "oh"

But I heard you say "ah"

No, I'm telling you I said "oh"

What's the dilio, on the iPhone instant voice translation App I saw recently on a tv commercial, the one where the young american guy is trying to talk to some old guy on a quiet Italian street, and when the old guy, who speaks no English looks at the kid like, what the hell are you trying to say, the kid just talks into his I-phone, and the phone translates his sentence into spoken Italian, and the kid holds the phone up to the old Italian guys ear, and the language barrier is gone, just like that. Something about, my grandmother came from this village, and the old guy's eyes light up like, oh! That's what you're trying to tell me, sure.

Actually, no. . . The only thing more difficult to understand than the Russian language is a computerized translation of the Russian language. Easier to just learn the language.

Talk about a fucking game changer, man that's what I need. You're such a pretty girl, but I know you're not one of those bad girls, and that's why I want to get to know you and give you really expensive gifts. Or something like that!

OK, have to work on that one. Good idea for a thread though,"Russian pick-up lines" (listening Jackson?)

Oh, by the way, here's a tip. The week BEFORE Easter, the weather sure is still pretty cold, but University and Institute classes are off for the week, for the holiday, which means the cuties have free time on their hands. .

You should have gone to church on Saturday, for the blessing of the Kulich. It's quite a sight: all those cute dyevchyonki, bowing reverently before a table of phallic symbols, with the jizzum dripping over them (the kulich that is). I'll give you 3 guesses what's on their mind when they get home, and you'd probably get all three of them right.

But if you didn't make it to Church, here's a traditional Easter greeting for you. . .

Христос воскресе! (Christ is risen)

Воистину воскресе (Truly, he is risen)

[Bez Bezarra]

Gotcha Bez,

East to north, back over and then from there it's straight south and keep going past and across and then back to narrow it down.

It's spelled Poka. You don't want to look like an American, do you?

Brighter than the sun shines stronger, the wind blows in the window, with a scream rushing up to heaven.

That's the message that Luba sent me this morning for Easter Sunday. Met my freebie yesterday for a long walk and a little tea on the sofa. She's my very first Russian stutterer. Very pretty, but a little taller and larger frame than my tastes run, nice legs though. What are you going to do, eh? A freebie is a freebie, they can't all be 45 kilo zubachistka kukla's, like the dozens of super smoking hot ones I watched running around last night in the klub.

So I really gave it my best shot, and came up with an Easter goose egg! I tried with the billiard room manager, a gal that spoke very good English, and with some kazakh looking Okron bouncer / doorman / security guy, and my crazy offers of any amount of money, moderate to infinite, all came up unsuccessfully. Maybe that's why I always say, that nightclubs have never gotten me anywhere. You would think that at least some of the cuties in this place, that was pretty packed last night, would not pass up $300, $400, or even $500 for a few hours. You would think the dumb bouncer, or the bar manager, would try a little harder, than just giving me the name of another club, with $200 comission on the line that I was willing to gift, for some help getting hooked up. But all to no avail. Four hours, I hung in there, kept telling myslef, don't give up, don't quit.

Am I sounding like a stupid gringo yet? That's rhetorical, okay, no need to answer. How did they explain it to me, oh yeah, well its the Russian mentality. Oh please, don't try that one on me. If my game wasn't so lame, I'm convinced that some of those dolls would be thrilled to have a big wad of cash to go on a shopping spree at the mall for some more tight revealing outfits that they love to prance around in. I guess that's why Jackson gave us the Other Areas thread, cause some of us are better than others, in certain areas, and some of us just aren't.

Poka, paka, pokie-mon, pig in a poke. I don't know Stravinsky, when I listen on the phone, it sure never sounds like they're saying po-ka, it definitely sounds like pa-ka. Spelling? Who writes latin Russian anyway? Only dumb gringos like me.

What's the dilio, on the iPhone instant voice translation App I saw recently on a tv commercial, the one where the young american guy is trying to talk to some old guy on a quiet Italian street, and when the old guy, who speaks no English looks at the kid like, what the hell are you trying to say, the kid just talks into his I-phone, and the phone translates his sentence into spoken Italian, and the kid holds the phone up to the old Italian guys ear, and the language barrier is gone, just like that. Something about, my grandmother came from this village, and the old guy's eyes light up like, oh! That's what you're trying to tell me, sure.

Talk about a fucking game changer, man that's what I need. You're such a pretty girl, but I know you're not one of those bad girls, and that's why I want to get to know you and give you really expensive gifts. Or something like that!

But is that an App that is only capable of running while you're iPhone is online, or can it just be downloaded IN the phone, without only processing through the internet. One thing about the provinces, the internet is fucking shaky at best. And then the last thing I want is an insane roaming bill of mad expensive charges using a USA SIM account in the provinces. Hell, if I just turn my phone on, for one minute, to send one SMS to my driver, that my plane landed, I get a $20 roaming bill when I get home! Maybe it would need an unlimited data and roaming plan, I don't know, that sounds pricey. Or wouldn't you think, that some Russian mobile company would offer something like that, for locals to be able to translate spoken Russian into english? Guess that'll have to wait for my next trip.

Even some program that would translate SMS's would sure help. I've seen some of the girls here with something like that.

Obviously, what I needed last nightwas a girl on the inside, to arrange something within a group a girlfriends. Maybe next time. Oh, by the way, here's a tip. The week BEFORE Easter, the weather sure is still pretty cold, but University and Institute classes are off for the week, for the holiday, which means the cuties have free time on their hands. .

[Stravinsky]

Gotcha Bez,

East to Stavropol, north to Volgograd, back to Taganrog, over to Donetsk and then Zaporozhye. From there it's straight south to Simferopol and keep going past Sevastopol to Chornoye Morye. Across Chornoye Morye to Sochi and then back to Vladikavkaz. I think that pretty much narrows it down.

BTW - It's spelled Poka, not Paka. You don't want to look like just another American sex tourist, do you?

[Juicyfruit]

Anyone have recent experience of Lviv with good reports.

Not finding much on Mamba. Sponsor girls seem to be poor quality compared to Kiev.

What are the best clubs / bars to visit?

I personally love Lviv, but then again it's the only place in Ukraine I've been. I was there for a week and shagged two girls, one really hot, and snogged a few others.

Split club is pretty cool, only 5 euro to get in and drinks about 3 euro after that. I didn't need to pay for a lapdance, my friends did, and I was getting them for free, I ended up licking this girl's leg for a while.

Club Metro is full of kids, but I kissed one nice girl in there.

I'm moving to Lviv in about two weeks time! Haha, send me a message if any of you guys are in town!

[Juicyfruit]

Hi guys,

Sorry been away for a while. Regarding my Budapest train antics, the girl was 16 (LEGAL!) , and I couldn't say no because she was smoking hot.

I was in Lviv in December and I really liked the place. I'm not that much into paying for chicks (unless it's like $50 hehe) , but I did really well in Lviv. Was staying at a hostel called Kosmonaut, cheap place met some other guys and we hung out together and had fun.

Went to Split Club, that was really good we paid like 5 euro to get in and beers were only about 3 euros. The guys with me paid for lapdances but I was getting lots of attention for free, I remember licking one of the stripper's legs haha.

Met some girl with fantastic hooters, ended up getting a private room. I think she sniffs out foreigners in Lviv, she's keen to leave the Ukraine, can't blame her. Met another girl while we were having Pizza she was just staring at me alot, so I went over and talked to her, next day I was banging her.

Went to Millenium club but when I was there it was dead and I ended up playing pool with two smashed Ukranian dudes. Drinks were incredibly cheap, I had a double vodka for 1euro.

Also went to Metro club, that was fun, very young girls, most of them are in their teens (I wasn't complaining and I'm 34) hehe. Ended up scoring this blonde, but didn't shag her in the end.

And I will be moving to Lviiv in about two weeks time, I really like the city, loads of pretty students, it's dirt cheap. I work online, so can always move around if I don't like it.

Also I'm going to Kazantip in August, I am SO there. I will be in my element, these things have to be done before you get too old.

I will do some more research when I'm there, if anyone is coming PM me maybe I can arrange something in advance, we can hang out and have some fun, and if you're not a psycho you could probably use my place for banging.

[Bez Bezarra]

Well, another day, another ruble.

Two dark haired dyevs yesterday supplied by new mamachka want to-be Ileana. Neither will top the list on this trip, as far as beauty, but the first one, Katya, who I have to call either Katya #3 or chitvyerk Katay, another sweet institute styudenka that could really suck her way into history, with a fine set of blow job lips that exceeded my expectations, and provided the afternoon's entertainment. She had kind of an Elvira Mistress of the Dark look about her, very long thick jet black hair and brown eyes, come to find that her grandparents came from way down south in the Kavkaz regions. Tiny nipples and a bubble butt, was able to light her up and had her squirming under the gun.

The evening brought Alyona, another dark haired beauty with a hefty set of jugs, very soft silky black hair, but a bit of an attitude. Decided to cut her time short, as I was getting pretty exhausted, and went straight for the anal option. Have to say this was worth the extra rubles, though I won't repeat with the attitude.

Setting up now for the weekend, lunch and dinner for something new on the menu, sounds promising. Still no pics, I'm afraid. Actually overheard two americans gavariting Angliski yesterday, while strolling down the main drag, a bad sign I suppose. Some tall white guy in a gray business suit with an american woman, talking about politics, how depressing is that? He stood out in the crowd. I was almost tempted to ask if he knew any sports bars here with NBA TV on satellite, so I could watch my big 3 crush the Sixers on Sunday, but I think I will keep looking for that on my own. I did not come all this way to speak to some boring ex-pat with his lady in tow. No offense to you ISG types, this geek was no monger.

Paka.

[Bez Bezarra]

That's right, I'm back in my old stomping grounds, on Bakulina street, right down Lenina Prospekt from Ploschad Svoboda. Let's meet up at Charlie's Disco on the corner with my Syrian bartender Cyrus the Virus, he'll fix you a mean Ivan the Terrible. That's two shots of vodka, a shot of Tia Maria, half a quaalude, throw in three pearl onions, a shot of concecrated borsht, two matzoh balls, a celery swizel stick, a gram of red Lebanese, a couple drops of wombat blood, some brake fluid, and a half a jigger of Kaopectate for the morning squirts.

A few of those and you'll stop looking for me, ya think?

Now, back to the gushy stuff, god almighty! The days are starting to blur together, which is a good sign considering I'm only in cuntry less than a week, or maybe its lack of sleep or combination of both. Yesterday, I think, I invited Marina, a goofy looking lanky Institute student, but really my kind of dyev, sort of hot, but totally clueless of the fact. And just ready for training, as she explained she's only ever had one boyfriend. Unfortunately, that meant that this will be a work in progress, if even I can ever crack the case. Some espresso at the Armenian cafe, then back to my place to look at photos, but not much progress after that. A guy's got to try, right.

So on to Kristina, who I met last year, and you would think from all her emails sounding so happy and excited that I'm coming back to see her, that she wouldn't have been so blase'. Maybe it was my cooking? Or she had a long workday? I don't know. I'll have to stick to the Dr. Skank Play Book and give her one more try, as this was the second date, and a least I got in a make-out session, but that was it. Maybe she'll open the gates on the thrid date, either that or its quits. Don't want to get fined by Skank for vioalting the rules.

Since I was in danger of going 24 hours without twat, I finally called Natasha, who is a real sex maniac that I spent several nights with last year. She's the Melanie Griffith look-alike, the 20 year-old Melanie version. She'd been waiting for me to show up, and was over here in 20 minutes. No longer asking for sponsorship, now she's begging for sperm. If ever there was a cat in heat, this girl has gone baby-crazy. She's very cute, and hot to boot, but knocking her up seems like a recipe for disaster.

I had to kick her out the door at 11:00 this morning, when I remembered that Lena #2 was bringing over Katya Wednesday, (not to be confused with Katya Monday, that super-mamachka Dasha brought over from her class at the Pedagogical Institute). That's a teacher's training college by the way, not a pervert asylum! Anyway, Lena #2 had promised to introduce me to her Jessica Alba look-alike padruga today, and god bless her, it was true. Dirty blond and very tan, with a truly amazing body and almost no mileage. That's two new 10's in 3 days, and both named Katya.

Its about 1 in the morning, Tiny Lera is just falling asleep after I plucked her virgin cherry back door. She cried so I gave her half a Percocet I had left over from when my sadistic dentist yanked out one of my choppers. Now she's buzzed and already forgot that I nearly split her in half, but for sure she'll be walking funny tomorrow.

I sure am glad I didn't waste $180 at Costco on that cool new Fuji, and that I went cheap last year when I got a new Sony Handycam without the HD and extra memory, because the camera is sitting in the bedroom collecting dust. Nobody will let me take their picture! Not even fully clothed with hat and coat! The only option may be to try going out to the boonies, but I don't know. Pity. Nothing yet to share with you guys. Let's hope I can meet a true extrovert, and soon.

[CityHunter77]

Anyone have recent experience of Lviv with good reports.

Not finding much on Mamba. Sponsor girls seem to be poor quality compared to Kiev.

What are the best clubs / bars to visit?

[Timmy011]

Nice town & hot girls, very friendly, crappy roads, cheap bars and no strip clubs in town.

Hotels .

Hotel Kiev.crap, cheap, in center 250 uah per room, inside look like Dracula castle with some neon lights (for adventurers) ,

Hotel Magnat.around 400uah per room, nice new little hotel in center with hot girl on reception, good and clean rooms.

Hotel Bukovina. Big soviet stlye hotel. 5 minute walk to center, with some renovated rooms. 420 uah, big room, clean, big bathroom, nice food and restoraunt, casino nearby, nice garden cafe on summer, and the most important. Available girls on demand at reception. I get offer for 4, 5 girls to come in my room to choose, but I passed couse I have girl coming from town. Price 400, 500 uah per hour.

Happy mongering

[Ziggym]

I really liked Lviv even though I was there only for a night and didn't venture out much. Some good food and nice areas. I plan to go back if someone can offer something here, or any other cities like it nearer to Kiev if I can figure it out.

[LifeSavour]

I'm looking for information about Donetsk, Ukraine. Has anyone been there?

Please give detailed information about cheap places to stay and the best cheap.

Places to meet girls. I plan to go there.

Thanks in advance.

I am here now. Send a message.

Is anyone else here? Lets have a beer!

LS

[Jalle]

Stayed in Bukowina which is an old soviet style hotel 2km out of centre. Some reports suggest this hotel has some WG action in lobby bar. However, I wasn't able to see any girls during my two nights stay. Instead I found some SW action nearby, but they looked very unhealthy so skipped.

This city certainly has potential, but language barrier is a real challenge. It appears that almost everyone speaks only Ukrainean and Russian. In two days I met only one person with decent English skills. Another reason to keep me inside was heavy rain.

Compared to other cities in Ukraine I didn't feel very safe in Chernivtsi. With some Russian basics one would surely have good chance to score.

[Jalle]

Uzghorod near Slovakian border has some action to be found.

I chatted few taxi drivers and ended up in a sauna-brother about 15km outside of the city. Kinda scary area, but US$ 50 gives you a suck&fuck. Sauna, pool, drinks and many other things are charged as expensive extras, but I was warned by the driver. I ended up paying 50+6 for sex and a large beer. Driver was waiting for me outside after giving some translation help to set the deal.

When it comes to session, I chose the only brunette Olga. She was probably closer to 30, but had the best smile of the line-up. Smile isn't very common human reaction in this part of world. She offered covered BJ followed by mechanical sex. Nothing to remember back home.

There were several good looking blondes available too. For some reason they were much more interested in me when I left the place. I can't remember the name of this place, but I'm sure any driver will get you here.

[Robert The Great]

I'm looking for information about Donetsk, Ukraine. Has anyone been there?

Please give detailed information about cheap places to stay and the best cheap.

Places to meet girls. I plan to go there.

Thanks in advance.