Thread: Nigeria
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08-31-12 13:12 #671
Posts: 23IkejaGoblins Port Report."OLYMPIC SPECIAL"
Hi Gang.
And Congratz to Nigeria on their first Gold Circle, sorry Gold MEDAL of the Olympiads! That it's in the Paralympics probably says it all. Draw your own conclusions.
Once again I feel it necessary to enlighten the great and the good viewers of this forum about the less-than-good points of the Naija Sistas.
I have posted a few blogs on Port Harcourt, however, this I had to share. My regular GF in PH has generally been quite fair over the years I have known her, but, like all these girls who profess undying love and sweet things for the Oyibo / Onyocha, we are simply a revenue stream running in parallel with however many 'streams' they can keep going at any given time. So no shocks there then.
I live in the Centre of Effluence (Lagos an 'in joke' for my Nairaland compadres) and work a fair bit down Port Harcourt (and I fuckin' love the place) and first met Chichi (very nearly her full name PM me if you think you need it) some few years ago, and to be fair, I like her a lot never lived with her am aware that she has to survive therefore I ain't the only one. We're all over 21 and know the score (money for hand, back for ground) and so on. And I have paid my way well enough over the time, and she does alright out of me and no complaints at all, at all.
So we have a row one night (the cause of which she will undoubtedly divulge in her memoirs because I am fucked if I know what it was all about!) and she demands 'settlement' of. Now put your drinks down before you spill them. 3,000, 000 naira. Yeah, this is not a misprint, three fucking million naira, well I got to hand it to her: this was quite an ask! Being a bit of a bullshitter myself ('what? ' I hear you say, 'The Goblin pulling a flanker? ') I could not resist the temptation so I 'negotiated' it down to 2. 75M and wrote her a cheque for said amount and left.
So all was cleared and finalised and everyone was very happy. THE END.
Postscript to the tale: I had a phone call from UBA bank last week asking do I know a man attempting to cash a crossed cheque in the girl's bank account for 2. 75M in Port Harcourt? I said no, but I think my cheque book may have been stolen. 'Ah', they said, 'this would explain why the cheque in your name was signed by a Mr. Daffy Duck'. Final question was 'Do I wish to press charges? ' I can only begin to imagine the questions and grammar flying about over this down there. Hahaha. Talk about laughing all the way to the bank!
Moral of this story is that generally Nigerian women (or rather those frequenting places we like to go!) are worth every last milligram of their horrible reputation, and are to be trusted as far as you can throw a grand piano with a fat man playing it. It sounds like I have a tainted view on Nigeria's fair sex not so: it is simply a realistic one. There are nice girls out there, but as various other reports on this forum have correctly pointed out, the younger the better (like uni girls) good time, no strings with money thrown at them etc. A bit older and the 'survivor gene' becomes active, and remember: ex-pats equals pay days with overtime and bonuses! In addition, when the laydeez all get together, the new girls get corrupted by the older ones and the 'Oh, he should be giving you this and buying you that, and see what else you can milk it for' starts coming out. I have seen this in glorious action many times, I can't speak pidgin, but I can understand exactly what is said. (If you can, DO NOT let on that you can!) So when you study the form, as they say in racing circles, they all too often start off good, going gets heavy, and then can go mental and bugger off at wild tangents (don't bet on that race!). Go for the three F's (Find / Fuck / Flee) and be done, hanging about too long seems to give aggravation. Besides do you REALLY want to discuss the state of the economy, religion or quantum mechanics with a chick with nice tits that can hardly spell her own name? If she can mouth the letter 'O' she should have something else in it.
Regards Ikeja 'Quack-Quack' Goblin
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08-30-12 22:40 #670
Posts: 156Originally Posted by Mercenario [View Original Post]
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08-07-12 09:37 #669
Posts: 186Originally Posted by Desert Sandman [View Original Post]
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08-05-12 18:43 #668
Posts: 156Originally Posted by Mercenario [View Original Post]
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08-04-12 19:02 #667
Posts: 186Preparations for Nigeria
Originally Posted by Mercenario [View Original Post]
THE FRIENDS. Also via Facebook I made contact to some guys to have local chaps for information, clubbing and for more easy chasing of non-pro girls.
THE PRESENTS. So far I've bought 3 used Blackberrys for the girls, the BBs almost look new. Furthermore I'll buy some perfume. All will be wrapped in present-paper.
THE UTILITIES. My stock of condoms if full and my stock of Kamagra also.
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08-03-12 20:14 #666
Posts: 250Chapter 2, the exact reverse. Stay away from Jennifer from Delta state
Well I knew it was too good to be true. She got into my house first knowing I would not dare kick her out. Had a great time but forgot to negotiate price and if we disagreed it would have been hard to get her out. In the morning she demanded 15, 000 Naira (about $100 USD) I called security but they said if they dragged her out of the house it would get into the press and make the compound look bad. I ended up having to give her 15, 000 Naira. Stay away from Jennifer from Delta state. 20 years old, has a giant folding pink / red / fuchia coloured purse, nasty piece of work, met her at Soho club in Wuse 2.
Originally Posted by Interracial [View Original Post]
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07-30-12 15:22 #665
Posts: 186I'am a lucky man!
Originally Posted by Blackwhite99 [View Original Post]
I was lucky to find a black paradise in Madrid, read my post there.
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07-30-12 14:09 #664
Posts: 235That's good news, you lucky man!
Originally Posted by Mercenario [View Original Post]
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07-30-12 09:28 #663
Posts: 186Visa.
Originally Posted by Blackwhite99 [View Original Post]
Today I was informed by email that my visa was issued. My last attempt with another invitation was successful. NIGERIA HERE I COME.
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07-29-12 16:44 #662
Posts: 250Abuja. Soho club in Wuse 2
With a very wealthy class in Abuja you get very interesting types of clubs. Both Cubana and Play in Wuse 2 are mostly occupied by the local middle class there and not many working girls but goregeous ones and I was the only white guy. But if you go to Soho club in Wuse 2 there are lots of 'semi-pros' who 'claim' to be university students, mostly NOT going to school in Abuja but rather far away states who come to Abuja when school breaks for some extra cash. Lots of old white guys like myself. First girl I met asked for 10, 000 Naira but we agreed to 8, 000 (that's $50 USD). Luckily, a much darker, taller, and slimmer one arrived. When I bought her a drink (all drinks, beers, single shots are 1, 000 Naira, about $9 USD) which is not cheap, I asked her about price. She didn't want to talk about money. Being only 20, I hope she would not go hard- core on me. Got a great deal, all night and again all morning. Gave her 6, 000 (just under $40) and she did not complain. Still trying to get it down to the Kenyan rate of around 2, 000 Ksh (about $25 USD0 but no luck so far at least without complaing)
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07-26-12 04:28 #661
Posts: 235Visas
Guys, the reason that the NIS have been cracking down on visa applications recently is because so many expats have been caught living and working in Nigeria while having entered the country on a tourist or business visa. There's nothing different here to the immigration policies of our own countries.
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07-25-12 23:59 #660
Posts: 186Corruption is unknown in Gemany
Originally Posted by Interracial [View Original Post]
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07-25-12 18:33 #659
Posts: 250High rejection rate is also due to the expectation to receive bribes
They also have a high rejection rate because these 'new' officers expect a bribe in return. I have never been rejected for a visa when applying to the Kenyan embassy in Rwanda. But when I went to Nigeria I was rejected immediately. It has to be because of Nigeria.
Originally Posted by Mercenario [View Original Post]
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07-25-12 16:20 #658
Posts: 186Originally Posted by Roman Guy [View Original Post]
But since the beginning of 2012 there are special immigration officers of the "NIS", who handle all this stuff. They are like watchdogs.
(NIS = Nigerian Immigration Service) VES told me today after I had asked, that more than 50% of all visa requests for Nigeria are refused compared to 10% before 2012.
THANK YOU, STUPID NIGERIAN GOVERNMENT!
If they don't want tourists, they should fly a flag in front of each embassy and consulate: "No tourists wanted. Stay out".
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07-25-12 08:12 #657
Posts: 861Troubles With Visa
Originally Posted by Mercenario [View Original Post]
I know Nigerian people here at home in Italy but I prefer not to demand for any invitation letter from their relatives because the price to pay might be to high:money or worse, something like "carry this or that to my family in Nigeria (20 kg of shoes, cloth, tv, telephones, pc,.).".
I try to contact two guest houses in Lagos and propose them to pay two or three overnights in change of a receive or invoice to be used as warranty or guarantee to get a visa (embassy told me it is ok.).
The point is that since a couple of days I try to contact Hotel Ritz (warning Ritz and not De Ritz) and Famoss both in Ikoj but no of the phone numbers I have, are available.
Can anyone of you check those two spots and send me a valid extreme of them? (via pm in case of email or phone or fax).
Address are: Ritz 41, King George V. Famoss 59 Lawson St.