Sosua Reports

[Wrx2005]

This doesn't exactly fall under treating a chica badly to get respect or to be liked. But I was supposed to meet a chica on Skype this morning (9 am ). Chica never showed up. 17 minutes later, I sent her a text letting her know I was online at 9. (I was doing other things, so it wasnt a big deal. ) "Since you didn't show I'm going to take care of important things." Chica texts me right away to tell me that she is sorry, she's online now. Now I know better. She was probably on Skype with one of her other customers, and didn't finish with him fast enough. Even if she wasnt, she was late. Now I could have easily got back on Skype to chat. But IMO that would of sent the message that she can do that anytime, followed by the same lame "excusame mi amor".

Moreover, she needs to realize, that if she is going to be late, then give me a courtesy call. I told her this before. She obviously don't have a problem using her minutes, because she called and texted me when I told her I wasnt waiting. IMO it's the subtle forms of disrespect or inconsideration thats tolerated from these chicas that leads to much bigger forms of the same.

Now when there is money involved, some of these chicas still can fuck up a good thing. You tell a chica a time to get together, and they show up 2 hours later, and you still are waiting for her? That sets a bad example. I have a buddy that met a chica on her scooter at the Playero. She was 2 hours late. Kept playing phone tag until she got there. What we suspect, she was handling other client (s) and couldn't really come on time, so she was stalling my buddy.

When the chica finally got there, (after turning down viable offers from other chicas) her performance was whack and hurried. He was very dissapointed in her and in himself. So that day he should have learned a lesson of not allowing a chica to hustle you for your time and money. What he should have done, was go to plan B find another chica, ignore the chicas calls. Or tell her straight up on the phone that he made other plans. She may not learn a lesson, because she don't give a shit, but at least you aint allowing yourself to be stalled, and worse, have a bad session.

[Frannie]

I too would like to see some examples. In the states, it's quite common to hear some men claim that women give thugs and bad boys more respect and their attention than guys that are NICE. Maybe thats the direction he's going?

I think there is a certain amount of truth in the sense that women respect men who are assertive, but that is not quite the same as treating them badly. For example if I tell her that I want to watch golf on TV for four hours on a Saturday, and then I stick to that program so that she can't watch her beloved novellas, then she will respect that. But that is quite different from, say, taking the card from the cable box when I leave the house, so that she cannot watch her novellas when I am gone. I think that would just make her angry and not earn respect.

I don't know if women "respect" thugs and bad boys, but certainly there are types of women who get into unhealthy relationships with criminal types, usually due to low self esteem, financial dependence, and lack of a viable alternative. There was an interesting case in the UK recently when a guy who was in and out of prison murdered a girl of 12 in an apparent sexual attack and hid the body in the attic. The guy was the boyfriend of the grandmother, but had also had had a relationship with the mother, who lived in the same house. One would ask why the women would bother with such a loser, but of course the answer is that they are also big time losers and have a string of these guys so they can get sex, money, drugs, etc.

See this and note the picture of the dead child's real birth father, a former boyfriend of the mother.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...prisoners.html

[Wrx2005]

the problem is that if you treat them badly so that they will respect you more, does this really lead to a harmonious relationship, or will you hate yourself for picking a chica who makes you behave this ugly way? can you give an example of this therapeutic mistreatment and how it works without causing underlying resentment or public embarrassment? would you ignore her birthday and give her extra chores instead while you go out with another woman?

sorry if i sound thick, but i always like concrete examples of situations versus abstract theories.

i too would like to see some examples. in the states, it's quite common to hear some men claim that women give thugs and bad boys more respect and their attention than guys that are nice. maybe thats the direction he's going?

[Frannie]

Frannie, ask her what being your novia entails.

I don't need to ask. It means meeting her ever escalating demands for money for various projects that she will reveal in the course of time in exchange for sex which will be good at first, but subject to the laws of diminishing returns. Being a novia also implies exclusive sex without condoms, though she would take the pill.

Being a novia could just mean being a girlfriend in a straightforward sense for a single man without other domestic commitments. The word "novia" in Spanish can mean "girlfriend" or "mistress", but it can also be translated as "fiancee" or as "bride" depending on the context.

[Mr Enternational]

Frannie, ask her what being your novia entails. LOL.

[Frannie]

i find that the worst you treat these dr chica's the more they like you and respect you.

if you treat them like a queen they will run all over you and try to scam you as much as they can. when i treat them like the bottom of my shoe, deep down they respect me more. i guess deep down alot of these girls have low self esteem issues.

the problem is that if you treat them badly so that they will respect you more, does this really lead to a harmonious relationship, or will you hate yourself for picking a chica who makes you behave this ugly way? can you give an example of this therapeutic mistreatment and how it works without causing underlying resentment or public embarrassment? would you ignore her birthday and give her extra chores instead while you go out with another woman?

sorry if i sound thick, but i always like concrete examples of situations versus abstract theories.

[Frannie]

interesting you say that. imho, it appears that none of the other threads bash their location and service providers as much as sosua. quite a few reports describe sosua in very unflattering terms. it seems like some members have a love and hate relationship with this place. mind you i can compare it only to threads that i have read which are mostly asian and european.

surely, its better than north america (except mexico maybe) and sosua may have even less to offer in few years from now.

this is true and i have noticed the same thing.

i think it is still possible to find some girl friend type girls in sosua, but guys are very ambivalent about what they want. some want girls who will make love like lovers, and yet they still want to avoid any kind of intimacy and don't want to work on the relationship.

when i first came to the dr ten years ago, the attraction was always that it was possible to have relationships with attractive young women who were not like stereotypical drug-taking, cigarette-smoking, alcoholic prostitute of the type one would find on the internet in the us. for the most part this was true. how often will you see middle-aged men dining with young prostitutes in restaurants in the us, or dancing with them in discos?

i have always traveled alone, but these days it seems quite common for men to travel in pairs or in groups and be very concerned about the opinion of their peers. not only does this affect their ability to get into relationships, but it also blocks the total immersion experience in the spanish language and dominican culture. anxiety about sex is also managed by heavy drinking of alcohol.

although i am not actively involved in the sosua bar sex scene these days, i do think that what was available before is still available if you just look for it. i was told the other day by a seriously cute 19-year-old that she loves me and she wants to be my novia. even though this is obviously complete bullshit and the novia thing will never happen, these flattering words still fall pleasingly on the ear, because few men of over 60 have the opportunity to turn down a 19-year-old. i also have a very attractive married woman of 33 in a long-running flirtation that could probably be consummated if i really wanted. i know a very attractive girl of 18 who is probably a virgin and who would like nothing better than a nice, reliable boyfriend who would give her a bit of financial help to continue going to school, chat on the internet, take her out for dinner, buy her a few clothes, etc.

[The Mind Bender]

I find that the worst you treat these DR Chica's the more they like you and respect you.

If you treat them like a queen they will run all over you and try to scam you as much as they can. When I treat them like the bottom of my shoe, Deep down they respect me more. I Guess deep down alot of these girls have low self esteem issues.

I completely disagree.

As long as you let your boundaries be known up front there's nothing wrong with treating a chica well.

The girls I deal with always want to stay longer because I make them laugh and feel comfortable.

As long as you're not a gullible simp chances are she'll appreciate it

The more I read about Sousa the less I want to go. I leave for the DR on Monday the 8th. I'll stay in Punta Cana with my gf until Saturday the 13th and then am taking a bus to meet my buddy who is flying into Santo Domingo. We were then planning to bus it up to Sousa and stay there until Thursday, the 18th. But now that I'm reading how much Sousa has changed I'm not so interested in it anymore. Are there any other beach towns that are safe and friendly to Americans, and where we can meet some girls? I'm starting to think Cabarete may be better. The girls in Sousa sound like the same haggling, bad attitude, bunch that are here in America. And the prices are pretty similar too. I'm looking for a girl that can at least play the part of a novia. The types of girls that were described in the "old Sousa" post. I'm not a fool. I know in the end of the day it's all about money. But the experience one can get for their money can be dramatically different.

don't let certain comments turn you off there's still plenty of good time to be had in Sosua

just use common sense and your instincts and you'll be fine

[Combo]

Looks can be deceiving. I just talk to them, the accent would tell.

In reality, it doesn't matter, if I like her, I don't care where she is from, or how she looks.

And don't put too much mind on what "guys" say as most of the time we say things to boost our egos, and feel good about our "choices".

Just do your thing and try to have fun while doing it, otherwise you might lose a good thing!

No kidding. Talk to them for 10 seconds and it will be pretty obvious. Or ask them "De donde eres?" They'll either tell you a city in the DR or say Haiti.

[Combo]

I find that the worst you treat these DR Chica's the more they like you and respect you.

If you treat them like a queen they will run all over you and try to scam you as much as they can. When I treat them like the bottom of my shoe, Deep down they respect me more. I Guess deep down alot of these girls have low self esteem issues.

I think you're going a bit too far. I definitely agree that these women respect you more if you're not a pushover. Paying a high asking price, letting her dictate the terms of your interaction usually don't get you a better experience. They just let her know you're an easy mark and possibly increase your chances of trouble. Having said that, I think that these girls should be treated as fellow human beings. It's a fine line that a smart hobbyist gets a feel for over time.

[ConquerorVal]

the more i read about sousa the less i want to go.

interesting you say that. imho, it appears that none of the other threads bash their location and service providers as much as sosua. quite a few reports describe sosua in very unflattering terms. it seems like some members have a love and hate relationship with this place. mind you i can compare it only to threads that i have read which are mostly asian and european.

i do recall one contributor to the philippines thread that was attacked by quite a few members. their criticism was justified as the man was charged for having sex with **** girls. one has to search deep in the sosua report to find something positive or really helpful, especially for a newbie. i almost dread reading the comments, which if not trivial, often have strong undertones of aggression. it is quite evident that there are some very opinionated and entrenched mongering schools of thought in the sosua camp. chris long's guide was the last helpful thing i read. i have committed myself to coming here in august, and have really no expectations of what to expect, even though i have been to dr (pp) about 15 years ago, but not as a monger. i think you should not focus on what sosua was like years ago. if you have not been there during that time, it is irrelevant. changes, everywhere rarely seem to benefit a monger anymore. i say, live on the edge, (just joking) and go for it. surely, its better than north america (except mexico maybe) and sosua may have even less to offer in few years from now.

[Rebel Monger]

I do not remember this being discussed anywhere before, so I will ask it. I've heard many guys say that hatians are better choices than the dominicqn chicas.

Can you, and how do you tell, by looking at a girl, if she is hatian or dominican?

Looks can be deceiving. I just talk to them, the accent would tell.

In reality, it doesn't matter, if I like her, I don't care where she is from, or how she looks.

And don't put too much mind on what "guys" say as most of the time we say things to boost our egos, and feel good about our "choices".

Just do your thing and try to have fun while doing it, otherwise you might lose a good thing!

[OldKool]

THE CLAIM THAT RACE IS NOT A FACTOR IN THE dr IS bs. Go to the upscale malls you will see no dark people unless they are picking up trash. Everyone accepts there place. Every one know the rules. I have seen women on Cupid darker then me who claim they are white. I understand there are classifications of color. In families you will have every shade of the rainbow.

Yes, apparently the word has different shades of meaning all over the Caribbean.

For my first two years living in the DR, I had many conversations with a dark-skinned dominicana living in the same apartment block. She came from the San Pedro de Macoris area, where many Cocolos settled. She had a British surname and with me being English that prompted her to tell me many times that her father was a Cocolo. I was puzzled to think she was so proud to have this remote connection with the glorious British Empire, but I have since realized that the point was to "reassure" me she had no Haitian ancestry.

[Midnight831]

The more I read about Sousa the less I want to go. I leave for the DR on Monday the 8th. I'll stay in Punta Cana with my gf until Saturday the 13th and then am taking a bus to meet my buddy who is flying into Santo Domingo. We were then planning to bus it up to Sousa and stay there until Thursday, the 18th. But now that I'm reading how much Sousa has changed I'm not so interested in it anymore. Are there any other beach towns that are safe and friendly to Americans, and where we can meet some girls? I'm starting to think Cabarete may be better. The girls in Sousa sound like the same haggling, bad attitude, bunch that are here in America. And the prices are pretty similar too. I'm looking for a girl that can at least play the part of a novia. The types of girls that were described in the "old Sousa" post. I'm not a fool. I know in the end of the day it's all about money. But the experience one can get for their money can be dramatically different.

[Charles Pooter]

That is very interesting. My family is Puerto Rican and in our culture the word "Cocolo" is very degrading. It worse than calling a black person the "N-Word". That word is very offensive!

Yes, apparently the word has different shades of meaning all over the Caribbean.

For my first two years living in the DR, I had many conversations with a dark-skinned dominicana living in the same apartment block. She came from the San Pedro de Macoris area, where many Cocolos settled. She had a British surname and with me being English that prompted her to tell me many times that her father was a Cocolo. I was puzzled to think she was so proud to have this remote connection with the glorious British Empire, but I have since realized that the point was to "reassure" me she had no Haitian ancestry.