Bangkok Massage Parlors - Except TULIP and ANNIES!

[Voyager1]

Upon the advice of EiHTooms I decided to take a look at the Soi Cowboy establishments. My first impression of Baccara was one of amazement as to how hot the girls on the stage were. Finally some eye candy for a sorely starved being.

I stayed there for a hour or so and almost bar fined one of the providers there. Before committing I decided to check out Crazy House first. After a few minutes of watching my eyes met with a smoking hot natural curved hotty. After all of the rejections encountered I figured this chickwas probably booked by some Japanese dude or the like. But after set was finished I approached her as she was standing still at a table. I could not believe my luck that this 8. 5 had not been snapped up or booked for the rest of the year. Thank goodness for slow nights. I don't think I would have had a prayer on a busy night. I chatted her up and we hit it off really quickly. I found it amusing that her main concern was that she had a tanned skin tone. And she was trying to tell me to make sure I understood that.

Girl, that is not what I am looking at and hell that thought really had not crossed my mind in the slightest. I let her know that she was what Bangkok was to me. After four days of duds, finally a breakthrough.

I bought her a drink and had her attention for a few minutes. This was now 2:30 am. I asked her what time this closes and she replied 4:00 am. Then she went on to state how exhausted she was and was going to have to continue to dance. After she went back on the stage, I realized that I was going to need at least $3000.00 bhats or so.

I checked my reserves and realized I was going to come up short. So, sadly, after reflecting the time of the morning together with her being so exhausted I bid her goodbye. Just before my departure she gives me a peck on the cheek something that was totally unexpected.

Regardless of the outcome from this place, I have to say meeting a friendly down to earth 8. 5 was so, so very refreshing after days of disappointments that I now have hope that they do exist.

[LA Guy 5]

In my experience, If a girl provides A+, she is very likely to provide all the other services you mentioned and BBBJ.

I remember a friend who was a Brazilian hand telling me a few years ago that he didn't like anal and typically did not partake, but would only go with girls who said they did anal for precisely the reason you give, i.e., the expectation of better service all the way around.

On the other hand there are anomalies that crop up now and then. For example, I have had more than one experience in Brazil where a girl started with aggressive rimming, but then tried to throw on a condom for the BJ. What??

[Voyager1]

I guess I am not as lucky as you. I go to Germany every year, mostly to the FKKs around the Frankfurt / Koln / Dusseldorff triangle. My experience has been hit and miss, just like with the oilies in Bangkok.

I think what makes FKK unique is that the interview process is inherently built in. Together with what you see is what you get. To date my experiences at FKK has been more positive then negative. That is not what I can say for BKK. Here it is all a game of chance it seems.

What I find amusing is that the Escort services layout exactly what the provider will and will not do. Yet the Massage Parlors play the box of chocolate game. You never know what you are going to get. For those short on resources and ones just barely able to make it out here, this kind of a guess is really a waste of time.

Unfortunately I had a smoking hot provider at what was once known as Atlantis way back when, that was from BKK and I just could not get enough of her. She actually gave me two shots in one session that to this date I remember. So now I keep hoping I will find another one of her sisters. I was in Sharks in FRA last week and met up with a 8 from here. I would have given her a 9 had she not had silicon implants. Before pulling the trigger I convinced myself to, wait, as I was leaving for BKK in the morning and felt there would be plenty to go around. So I stuck to the local talent. In hindsight I think I clearly made a mistake.

Just thinking about the one left behind makes me want to put even more into this futile situation. But I have to restrain myself as my time has run out now and I leave here tomorrow.

The suggestion below to getting a decent provider by venturing into the Go-Go world seems pretty good for those without trust issues. I for one have heard of too many unfortunate outcomes in bringing a stranger to ones room. I suppose a separate room could be rented to counter any side effects that may occur. Something to ponder if and when I return.

[Lefeu]

...I guess I really am spoiled by Germany.

I guess I am not as lucky as you. I go to Germany every year, mostly to the FKKs around the Frankfurt / Koln / Dusseldorff triangle. My experience has been hit and miss, just like with the oilies in Bangkok.

[Sunlover2]

I've tried the emailing system with mixed results. I still think the best thing is to go on foot to the PSE oilies around 22/24 and 26 and spell out exactly what you want using the phrases that the girls understand. I get the girls to line up in front of me and then clearly ask them which do A+ and put my hand up, I used to ask them which did Anal and just got blank stares but A+ seems to get the message across. Some people may be a little uncomfortable with this but I figure that they have heard it all before. Once I've asked the question, a few girls will disappear and few will put their hands up generally giggling and looking at who else is putting their hands up. From there I make my selection hoping that any available lookers or spinners have their hands up.

Mamasan Candy at candymassage.com is very good about answering emails. It is one of the PSE shops.

SL.

[Goatscrot]

I guess I really am spoiled by Germany. I think, after having come to Bkk several times the sad reality of hot providers lousy service is starting to become too frequent. The tragic part is those are the only ones my little guy is satisfied with.

I gotcha and agree 100%. Sadly I am sort of in the same boat. I want a good looking gal who is nasty and fun. Almost impossible to find in the P4 P scene these days.

[EihTooms]

...I think, after having come to Bkk several times the sad reality of hot providers lousy service is starting to become too frequent. The tragic part is those are the only ones my little guy is satisfied with.

I am not sure if you were talking about all of Thailand's many p4 p options or just the massage shop option. Your observation is the same as mine with regard to massage shops and one of several reasons I partake of them very sparingly and then only if a "fail and bail" on my part doesn't matter much because I've got something much better waiting in the wings anyway. But I cannot say the same for the go-go bar option. In my experience, it is quite a bit easier and, ultimately, much less expensive to get a successfully completed as requested and desired boom-boom and / or BBBJ CIM with a hot go-go girl than stumbling onto such a combination, if ever, at a massage shop.

Of course, that does not mean every hot go-go dancer you want to have that outcome with will comply. The idea is to keep moving, keep interviewing even before you buy a single Lady Drink for the interviewee, until you get the right combination of looks, attitude and replies to your interview questions to justify paying the barfine and taking her to your room. You WILL find that combination virtually any night of the week in Bangkok. In my experience, it rarely requires more than 3 go-go girl interviews before I get a clear and definite "yes" to my requests. Sure, there are the rare occasions when I get to that fourth one. But if that bombs out, I either call it a night or hit one of the better BJ Bars in town. Then, invariably, the next night I will score a very enthusiastic "YES" on the very first try. So it all works out to be a much better average than many would think. I am talking about a real go-go dancer for the 700-800 baht barfine and 2,000-2,500 baht to her for Short Time and not a bait-and-switch scam Coyote girl.

It does require a bit more game than just walking into a massage shop, pointing and expecting the provider to make all the right things. You will want to come off as charming, sincere and kind-hearted as you can fake it. But the likelihood of getting the combination you described above is far greater in the go-go bar scene, despite the (undeserved, IMO) rap it gets, than in massage shops. If I had all the wasted 2,500 baht upfront payments back from the many "fail and bail" experiences I've been saddled with at massage shops over just the past three years I could fund a month or two of successfully completed sessions with hot go-go girls.

[Voyager1]

Did you tell her that CBJ was unacceptable during the session? Did you complain to the mamasan on the way out? Truth be told things are not going to get better unless we all stop accepting poor performance. There were a few posts to this effect earlier in the week.

I tried to motion and drop hints as much as possible but the girl kept proceeding as if this is it. I really did not see how one could interview in such a public setting in front of other guests and not to mention other providers. I guess I really am spoiled by Germany.

What pisses me off more is that I think I fell for this place about four years ago. My memory is fading but I remember a looker hooking me in at just about the spot where Addict is and doing the looky but no licky service.

However all the rave reviews over rode my gut feeling. This kind of thing should never be allowed here. I wonder if I can email a complaint. At the minimum I would like to see the implementation of the rating system being proposed. I think such a system would allow for pay for service rendered. Those not wanting BBBJ would get a reduced service fees and so on. This gotcha business has really f'd my vacation. Frustrated I tried Mango yesterday. On the menu were only 3 girls at the late hour. Hoping service triumphs looks. I decided to give one of them a whirl. This girl would hardly rate a 7 but was young with braces. I figured my little guy could probably make it work. The BBBJ was definitely really good start.

Clearly the BS of next door was not applicable here. Furthermore the provider started with FS rather then massage and then the rest. This is what sets apart the better places. They are aware of what the customer's priority is. Maybe this could also be used on the fee structure. In the end at Mango I did not complete the deal as the visual was simply not at the level needed.

Nevertheless at least this was not totally disappointing as BBBJ was pretty good. The massage too was not bad either. I think, after having come to Bkk several times the sad reality of hot providers lousy service is starting to become too frequent. The tragic part is those are the only ones my little guy is satisfied with.

I am headed to Colonze 2 or Nartree tonight and hoping to change my luck. This is my last ditch effort to keep the faith.

[Rocco Sha]

Ne neither. I think what is comes down to is most don't want to be seen as "bad girls. " And that is what "bad girls" do. Working in the P4 P industry can be rationalized as a "job" but if you really get into it and enjoy it, then you are a "bad girl. " Thailand is still very conservative in that sense.

I agree, the save face thing is a big thing in Thailand. In fact, it keep all the country behind because people can't express them-self openly in most situations.

Did you ever see a Thai showing passion for something openly?

[Mjen1970]

I don't have any hesitation to ask who does A+. After all the term is used on many of the oilies' websites.

Where I have a problem is asking about the other stuff because there is no clear terminology, which makes the questioning more difficult.

So may I suggest (tongue in cheek), that the oilies add to their A+ terminology the following:

DFK = D+.

Rimming = R+.

CIM = C+.

DATY= DY+.

CBJ = F-.

Or maybe they could just revert to the old days when you didn't have to ask; it was just available as a matter of course (with a few, not many, exceptions).

LA Guy 5, appreciate and enjoy your wit, Especially the grade for CBJ.

In my experience, If a girl provides A+, she is very likely to provide all the other services you mentioned and BBBJ. Some are a little funny about facials but I think that is a makeup thing. Obviously I'm going to stick a big YMMV at the end of this. Talking about facials reminds me of a session with Mony. Now Monika at Bongkot. I got off the plane, straight into the hotel and then into Bongkot with Mony and Nooknik, Mony took one of the greatest facials I've ever delivered, she was sodden. Can't wait to see her again in a couple of weeks.

[LA Guy 5]

I've tried the emailing system with mixed results. I still think the best thing is to go on foot to the PSE oilies around 22/24 and 26 and spell out exactly what you want using the phrases that the girls understand. I get the girls to line up in front of me and then clearly ask them which do A+ and put my hand up, I used to ask them which did Anal and just got blank stares but A+ seems to get the message across. Some people may be a little uncomfortable with this but I figure that they have heard it all before. Once I've asked the question, a few girls will disappear and few will put their hands up generally giggling and looking at who else is putting their hands up. From there I make my selection hoping that any available lookers or spinners have their hands up.

I don't have any hesitation to ask who does A+. After all the term is used on many of the oilies' websites.

Where I have a problem is asking about the other stuff because there is no clear terminology, which makes the questioning more difficult.

So may I suggest (tongue in cheek), that the oilies add to their A+ terminology the following:

DFK = D+.

Rimming = R+.

CIM = C+.

DATY= DY+.

CBJ = F-.

Or maybe they could just revert to the old days when you didn't have to ask; it was just available as a matter of course (with a few, not many, exceptions).

[Mjen1970]

I imagine that doing it by email is a good idea, since now the onus is on the management to actually provide. Whereas if you just walk in and ask, they are afraid if they don't say the right thing at that moment, with what ever limited supply they have, they will lose a customer. If you email ahead of time, they can easily ask around via phone and setup everything smoothly. And again, the onus is on them to acquire a customer, whereas if you walk in a shop you are considered to have already given them your money in their greedy eyes.

I've tried the emailing system with mixed results. I still think the best thing is to go on foot to the PSE oilies around 22/24 and 26 and spell out exactly what you want using the phrases that the girls understand. I get the girls to line up in front of me and then clearly ask them which do A+ and put my hand up, I used to ask them which did Anal and just got blank stares but A+ seems to get the message across. Some people may be a little uncomfortable with this but I figure that they have heard it all before. Once I've asked the question, a few girls will disappear and few will put their hands up generally giggling and looking at who else is putting their hands up. From there I make my selection hoping that any available lookers or spinners have their hands up.

[Mjen1970]

Anyone tried massage & barber salons in Soi 22? Any nice action and shave?

Wow, such a thing exists?? This is a long standing fantasy of mine. Getting a haircut/shave with a beautiful girl sucking me off under the covers.

[Illjarn93]

First called into Snow White last Monday evening. The line-up didn't impress looks wise so moved on. After checking a few places, a girl sat outside Boss Massage on 24/1 stood out so decided to give it a go. Chompoo looked striking, fairly tall and slim with really long hair and looked lively and fun, an attitude which continued in the room. While she was fun and chatty (in Thai), she was clearly inexperienced and pretty much did the bare minimum to fill out the 90 minutes. BJ was per functionary and I had to ask her to continue. 69 was refused due her finding it ticklish. My attitude when things like this happen is to keep things light and pleasant and go along with the flow to a certain extent, but make a mental note not to repeat. One shot, so-so yet pro-longed massage and 1 minute BJ, I won't be.

Having patronized places like Angel, Addict and Boss a few times on the one hand and Snow White and Mango on the other. I'm beginning to think that there's a widening gap performance wise between the few more PSE places and others with younger, cuter girls increasingly aimed at more Asian clientele. While I go into the latter with eyes wide open, neither expecting or demanding the same variety or intensity, it's getting to a point now where I increasingly come out disappointed and questioning why I just spent over 2000 baht. A considerable amount of money here for a few hours work, where the provider does as little as they can get away with, barely hiding their disdain for having to do anything remotely like work.

[ParkVille]

Went to Dream Heaven on Soi 33 at 8 PM, wasn't that much to chose from. I think the best time to go there is before 3:30 PM as it seems they are too busy from then until 7 and by then a lot of the talent leaves for the day it seems. Anyway the reason I like the Soi 33 is the girls are more experienced and less of the Asian-doll-good-girl-complex which I'm not really into. I only got the Body 2 body massage for like 1600 baht for an hour. Good teasing / technique from an experienced provider. One negative remark about DH33, they are not nearby other places and they are a bit of a walk away from all other related adult venues. So you kind of get stuck there if you don't like what you see, and the mamasan is a bit greedy (like all of them really) so there is pressure to pick a girl from what is sometimes too slim of a line-up.

I later went onto Dream heaven Soi 24/1 that night and got there at like 10 PM. I walked down that soi about 2 times and didn't really see anything I fancied until I spot a particular girl working at Dream heaven (Soi 24/1). She was definitely cute and built the way I like (not a frail Asian doll, had a good body). Look, this girl has got a giant ass / thighs (muscle / thick) and small waist, it's pretty insane. She's one of the few asian women who *really* has a butt, not just sort of / kinda has one. Decent tits too. I highly recommend going just to see that thing because is NICE. She's kind of young and her service wasn't bad but it wasn't good either. I got a good BBBJ though, and I think the lack of great service may have been on my part as I was on my second round and was tired that night.

In short, I highly recommend just swinging by Dream Heaven Soi 24/1 just to check out the ass on the one of the chicks who work there. I even more highly recommend getting a room with her in it if you are an ass man like I am, as those are kind of rare to come by. She is from Myanmar if it matters (I've noticed some of the women who come from there are both really cute but also busty / curvy).

Finally, some random intel about Nataree. Thursdays are not a good day to go because that's when the onsite doctor is there. This intel comes from Stickman's weekly and I concur. I have thought it was strange that they would have such a dip in Thursday as well yet Wed was busy.