Stupid Shit in the Philippines

[PBtoCobra]

30 k for that flight (2 tickets? Return? Direct flight? Not via Manila?

Can't believe the price as that is a flight I book direct on line for way less. Refunds are a hassle for sure and it ends up minus taxes / charges etc in a refund box that you can access in the next 3 months for other tickets. Never got real cash back just use the refund on other tickets. Many a time CP changed flight, cancelled them and I managed to find my way The only time I got miserable was when I had to cancel a Shanghai flight as I forget to use the refund in time.

But check your prices as one way is PHP 2500 max today with 20 kgs bags or PHP 8000 if you fly via Manila which is plainly stupid.

https://book.cebupacificair.com/Flig...ph&culture=&p=

That links says CEB-DVO return air fare is just over PHP 4 k. So how come was 30 k? Lots of family with you? 100 kgs of baggage LOL? Just intrigued as I fly this route and never pay more than 4-6 k depending on when I book (earlier to book is cheaper generally) with 20 kgs of bags.

There were 5 seats on the booking. This was really a warning to others. CP's Full refund statement was quite frankly a lie. My preference is Air Asia, and that's who got us there on time. Last minute bookings, for 5 was 40 K.

[Kabul Guy]

This one came to me second hand from a Philipino engineer I know.

They were pouring a new concrete slab on a road way. The pour was delayed, on Island Time I guess, and it was dark when the last concrete was placed. As normal they assigned one guy to stay to protect the fresh concrete until it was set.

The guy on guard duty thought that nothing would happen, guess he could not use his GPS to figger out what country he was in, and went home to drink and sleep while getting paid for some overtime pay.

Dumb ass trike driver comes along and drives right into the fresh concrete. He makes it few metres in before he is stuck. From the marks he had gotten some people to help try and push the trike out of the concrete and concrete being concrete was setting up quickly and eventually they had to abandon the trike into the hardened concrete.

When the construction crew comes back, they had to jack hammer the trike out of the concrete, they lifted it out, with a fair bit of concrete still attached and put it in the ditch, of course this bent the wheels and frame a little bit.

Trike driver comes by middle of the afternoon, claims that the trike was stolen while wearing clothes covered in concrete splatter. His buddy collaborates the theft story also still wearing clothes covered in concrete splatter. They want to be paid for the damage on the trike while not admitting to any responsibility for the damage to the concrete. (Which was much more than the trike was worth BTW.).

[Jingo10]

I had a flight from Davao to Cebu booked, to get me in mid afternoon. This was booked 4 months before we needed to fly.

I've booked internal flights the day before and never paid anywhere near that much, did you go via an agent?

I try never to fly cebu pathetic as they are always late, but sometimes I've had no choice.

I always use air Asia if possible, even if it is more expensive.

[Wicked Roger]

I had a flight from Davao to Cebu booked, to get me in mid afternoon. This was booked 4 months before we needed to fly. A few weeks before they announced a significant schedule change which would have lost us an afternoon and evening in Cebu on a 3 night visit, they gave me a number of options, one of which included a full refund.

The flights were 30 k, and the website refund was 16 K.

My advice, either not book with Cebu Pacific or suck up any flight changes. Fortunately I paid by my AMEX card, so they are currently refunding me, but there is the chance that they pull back the refund they have provided.

30 k for that flight (2 tickets? Return? Direct flight? Not via Manila?

Can't believe the price as that is a flight I book direct on line for way less. Refunds are a hassle for sure and it ends up minus taxes / charges etc in a refund box that you can access in the next 3 months for other tickets. Never got real cash back just use the refund on other tickets. Many a time CP changed flight, cancelled them and I managed to find my way The only time I got miserable was when I had to cancel a Shanghai flight as I forget to use the refund in time.

But check your prices as one way is PHP 2500 max today with 20 kgs bags or PHP 8000 if you fly via Manila which is plainly stupid.

https://book.cebupacificair.com/Flig...ph&culture=&p=

That links says CEB-DVO return air fare is just over PHP 4 k. So how come was 30 k? Lots of family with you? 100 kgs of baggage LOL? Just intrigued as I fly this route and never pay more than 4-6 k depending on when I book (earlier to book is cheaper generally) with 20 kgs of bags.

[PBtoCobra]

I had a flight from Davao to Cebu booked, to get me in mid afternoon. This was booked 4 months before we needed to fly. A few weeks before they announced a significant schedule change which would have lost us an afternoon and evening in Cebu on a 3 night visit, they gave me a number of options, one of which included a full refund.

When you log onto your booking to try and process a full refund the amount coming back is much less.

The flights were 30 k, and the website refund was 16 K.

So I took the issue with screenshots to email. Again they offered a full refund and confirmed they would do it manually. They failed to meet their timelines for a refund.

Eventually they only refunded about 6 K. So they failed to refund as promised.

I ended up booking flights with AirAsia for much more than the Cebu Pacific, so I am significantly out of pocket.

My advice, either not book with Cebu Pacific or suck up any flight changes. Fortunately I paid by my AMEX card, so they are currently refunding me, but there is the chance that they pull back the refund they have provided.

[NewImage]

ED,
The Big Apple is actually a fine establishment that had welcomed all gentlemanly behaviours up to and including dropping dead mid stroke in the front bar. I've been away for a few years now but I'm thinking of returning. I've got unfinished business there: 8 square inches remaining of the property where I haven't fucked a girl.
If you want to see old mongers winning at life drop around to Coco Lips. There was / is and old guy with a walking frame who swings by most nights. After 30 or 40 minutes to make it up the 3 entrance steps, he collapses into the couch reserved for him to the doors' immediate right. From there he doesn't / can't move all night. An old duck usually saddles up to him then escorts him back home for the inevitable. How he makes it back up the hill to Jack Daniels without collapsing, I have no idea.
He's my hero. Fuck rusting away in a nursing home waiting to die. Much better to burn out and die of a combination of untreated STDs in some shithole bar in PI.
Enjoy. G.

Going soon- he goes to JD's for the food, esp the ribs. The Deli gang tried to join the foreign legion but found out bang bang was a better option. Have often wondered about their past. Have spent a few times conversing, generally listening mostly. Yes 4000 BF are a bit steep and pretty boring doing the daytime. Besides diving, diving and diving not much else to do. And yes the Big A is not 5 star but it is edible, a good spot for people watching and mad keen sports fans like their Big Screen TV's. One thing that does p*ss me off is the smoking Koreans esp when all 6 light up after a meal. But you know a 2 min walk, some ok food and drinks, stroll to a bar for some friendly company and a few games of pool, stroll to CCL choose a partner, stroll 2 min back to hotel room where hopefully the service is above standard (not always in Sabang) and off to sleep. Ok for a week, maybe 10 days at a push. Any longer questions have to be asked.

But who am I to judge. James Dean said " Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today. ".

[Goferring]

Sabang has bunch of Western geriatric losers who rely on their measly pensions to get through the week. Most of the homeless people in my country have more pride in their appearance than these useless rascals. Their ration is two SMLs a week. They gather at two places. The Big Apple and the German delicatessen where the girly bars are. I saw one 100 year old American fuckwit yesterday talking about Bitcoins at the deli. At that point I knew I had to get out of there. He was talking like he was some fucking expert in crypto currencies. The fact is that junk is based on hot air and you cannot do any trend analysis as it's not based on anything. Idiot.

I call the Big Apple the Rotten Apple. It is always full of pathetic looking westerners getting drunk every night on cheap beer. The dive instructors are also getting drunk with them each night, thus filing you with confidence that they will be functional the next day when they have to rescue you. It is also full of the most hideous looking freelancers you can find anywhere in the Phils. If any of you mongers see me at Rotten Apple at the age of 98 drinking beer with toothless hookers, please take me around the back and shoot me. You will be doing the world a favour.

ED,

The Big Apple is actually a fine establishment that had welcomed all gentlemanly behaviours up to and including dropping dead mid stroke in the front bar. I've been away for a few years now but I'm thinking of returning. I've got unfinished business there: 8 square inches remaining of the property where I haven't fucked a girl.

If you want to see old mongers winning at life drop around to Coco Lips. There was / is and old guy with a walking frame who swings by most nights. After 30 or 40 minutes to make it up the 3 entrance steps, he collapses into the couch reserved for him to the doors' immediate right. From there he doesn't / can't move all night. An old duck usually saddles up to him then escorts him back home for the inevitable. How he makes it back up the hill to Jack Daniels without collapsing, I have no idea.

He's my hero. Fuck rusting away in a nursing home waiting to die. Much better to burn out and die of a combination of untreated STDs in some shithole bar in PI.

Enjoy. G.

[Engine Driver]

Sabang has bunch of Western geriatric losers who rely on their measly pensions to get through the week. Most of the homeless people in my country have more pride in their appearance than these useless rascals. Their ration is two SMLs a week. They gather at two places. The Big Apple and the German delicatessen where the girly bars are. I saw one 100 year old American fuckwit yesterday talking about Bitcoins at the deli. At that point I knew I had to get out of there. He was talking like he was some fucking expert in crypto currencies. The fact is that junk is based on hot air and you cannot do any trend analysis as it's not based on anything. Idiot.

I call the Big Apple the Rotten Apple. It is always full of pathetic looking westerners getting drunk every night on cheap beer. The dive instructors are also getting drunk with them each night, thus filing you with confidence that they will be functional the next day when they have to rescue you. It is also full of the most hideous looking freelancers you can find anywhere in the Phils. If any of you mongers see me at Rotten Apple at the age of 98 drinking beer with toothless hookers, please take me around the back and shoot me. You will be doing the world a favour.

[WestCoast1]

Imagine you are stranded on a South Sea islan, with nothing but fish you can spear, coconuts and bare breasted women with boobs bigger than those coconuts. You don't go asking for the wine list. Capiche?

Haha worthy of the ROD?

[PedroMorales]

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List...llibee_outlets

Over 150 outside of the Philippines.

Are in Vietnam. No one is arguing smart Pinoys are not smart. JB could well be the next big thing. McDonalds, KFC with a smile. Pepsi and CocaCola are clones, no different from 1,000,000 other Cola drinks. If JB succeed, good luck to them. But that is al they can commercially produce. I told a lie earlier I forgot to say what fantastic bread I make. Even French chicks love it. My secrets (sic) are good ingredients, time and patience. But I am nowhere near the league of a professional chef as it is not my thing. To me. It is chemistry. Not magic.

SML is not bad. But do not compare it to German, Belgian or Czech beers as that is a fight. This is all horses for courses stuff. The Philippines is crowded and poor so there is no space for haute cuisine. Nor did it have the depth of China or Japan.

Imagine you are stranded on a South Sea islan, with nothing but fish you can spear, coconuts and bare breasted women with boobs bigger than those coconuts. You don't go asking for the wine list. Capiche?

[Kabul Guy]

There are JBee in LA. They are fairly popular, like Checkers or McDo.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List...llibee_outlets

Over 150 outside of the Philippines.

[PedroMorales]

There is actually a Jollibee in London, close to Oxford Street station. But I've only ever seen Filipinos walk in to it. It is their Mecca.

Prince Andrew shudda gone there instead of to Pizza Express. No class.

[WestCoast1]

There is actually a Jollibee in London, close to Oxford Street station. But I've only ever seen Filipinos walk in to it. It is their Mecca.

There are JBee in LA. They are fairly popular, like Checkers or McDo.

[SaltyPete]

5. Philippine food. As you mentioned, it's crap. There is a reason you don't see any philippine restaurants outside the country. Also expat filipinas who settle in the west tend to blow up in size immediately, cause they keep eating the same Jollibee-style slop but now in western-sized servings.

There is actually a Jollibee in London, close to Oxford Street station. But I've only ever seen Filipinos walk in to it. It is their Mecca.

[Fast Buck Artist]

A solid list Aviator.

Having worked there for 2 years in 2009-2011, I have a few items to add to your list:

1. The trash. It's everywhere, So much junk in the rivers you can cross them and not get your feet wet. Worse, the burning trash. The preferred way of disposing of garbage in flip province is to chuck it into a pile and light up a bonfire. The stench is horrendous as well as very unhealthy.

2. No sidewalks. In any place where they exist, it gets occupied immediately by a tent selling assorted crap. Or it gets turned into a parking lot for scooters. Pedestrians just walk on the road, dodging vehicles.

3. The people. Quantity and quality. Way too darn many of them and the best ones leave the country as fast as they can earn enough pesos to buy a ticket and pay relocation costs.

4. Tribal culture. Filipinos are tribal, meaning they care only for their family and clan, and their plot of land, and give zero fucks about everything outside of it. It's the main reason countries stay in shithole status, this tribalism.

5. Philippine food. As you mentioned, it's crap. There is a reason you don't see any philippine restaurants outside the country. Also expat filipinas who settle in the west tend to blow up in size immediately, cause they keep eating the same Jollibee-style slop but now in western-sized servings.

- the white guy is always expected to pay. This is rule NO. 1. Even you join a dinner with middle class or rich local people; it is always expected that you pay.
- the constant yelling of SIR, SIR, SIR, SIR!!
- girls imitating movie stars and actresses the way the talk about themselves, life, love, friendship etc. Soooo pretending.
- The gruesome morning call of Chicken in every backyard in province.
- Burn-out / black-out. Very prevalent in the provinces.
- Lying. Yes it is a Christian catholic country. Most people go to church. But nobody seems to care about lying.
- Showing up late; expect a date to arrive 1-2 hours late.
- The hassle of getting from the airport; long taxi lines, sweltering hot, no cars etc.
- Road construction; every road junction (province) has an area not filled with concrete. Why not just fill it up to avoid the bumps?
- The terrible food / Jollibee culture. The food is horrendously bad in Phil compared to most other Asian countries. And un-healthy.
- Traffic in Manila; maybe actually 10% better this year, but still some of the worst citys in the world to move around.
- Scams like the airport bullet scams a few years ago, taxi scams etc.
- Mixing Tagalog with English in one sentence; just annoying! Seems like more of a show off.
- Corruption.
- Top 10% of rich people own 90% of all land assets and wealth. There are in fact only two classes: Super rich. And very poor.
- Politicians; 16-17 rich families run the country and provinces; it is more related to a mafia system than actual "free elections".
- Constant battering of Typhoons.
Feel free to add more.