Seeking Arrangements

[Pessimist]

How do you guys handle the logistics like getting a place to do the deed if it is in your hometown? Do you get a hotel room, go the girl's place or bring her back to yours?

Also, would you drive to a neighboring city, perhaps two hours from your hometown, for a ppm? Curious to know how you guys go about arranging this.

Always a hotel. Never, ever own home. Have been inside the girl's house a few times but I prefer the first time to be in a hotel. I am a bit paranoid.

Driving. Depends on your status. I am married. My biggest constraint is time and having to explain where I am. Making sure to cover money trail is a moderate concern but real because my spouse is informed, a professional and makes good money and all our accounts are joint accounts. So, withdrawing tens of thousands of dollars for the hobby has to be managed discretely. But really, the time aspect is far more critical for me. Having to come up with credible excuses where I am is not an easy thing especially given she knows a lot of my colleagues.

I assume this is a problem for other married folks here as well. Single guys have it easy.

[Ggekko2009]

How do you guys handle the logistics like getting a place to do the deed if it is in your hometown? Do you get a hotel room, go the girl's place or bring her back to yours?

Also, would you drive to a neighboring city, perhaps two hours from your hometown, for a ppm? Curious to know how you guys go about arranging this.

[Pessimist]

I wonder if this is the same looking from the SB side. I think there is a high burnout on girls that join hoping it will be easy money and then get bombarded with dick pics.

Some do, some don't. Clearly they need some thick skin as well. I see many girls on the site for a long time, while some others churning quickly but coming back with different names and pics and profiles.

Generally, I'd say if a girl is such a wall flower and easily offended by sexual references and nasty pics, she may be shocked and disconnect ASAP or not likely to come to the site in the first place.

Many girls learn to block guys very quickly.

I think they also have tons of unopened messages. I think the ones with sexy pics and come hither profile attract hundreds of messages a day and they get to them slowly if at all.

Keep in mind, while some guys here think all girls on SA are tutes (there are many guys on ISG who think every woman in the world is a tute. I am sorry for such Neanderthals), most girls have regular jobs, school work and so on. Most of them are hoping to make a little side money from SA. As such, checking messages and replying instantly is not a priority.

I have received replies months after I first contacted them. Just last night I heard back from a girl on text. I first said Hello, to her in September, she replied back a few months later, we exchanged numbers and I sent my last text to her in January but she replied yesterday. Some guys might act haughty and feel self important and think she ignored him and hence deserves to be blocked. I have no such pretensions, I will be pleasant and see how far it goes. If ever we meet and go further, great. If it fizzles out, which is much more likely, also fine. The good news is, there are lots of girls on the site and in the world and I am patient.

[Steve 9696]

I wonder if this is the same looking from the SB side. I think there is a high burnout on girls that join hoping it will be easy money and then get bombarded with dick pics.

Yeah definitely. The girls I've talked to say the guys are absolutely gross and come straight at them with pervy requests and scams and all the rest. It's equally exhausting for them. But the good news is all that shit makes guys like you and me stand out!

I would say the average "regular girl" seeking lifetime is 2-4 weeks. You have to be on top of it to catch the good ones.

[The Cane]

I wonder if this is the same looking from the SB side. I think there is a high burnout on girls that join hoping it will be easy money and then get bombarded with dick pics.

Based on what I heard from the SBs I met and some others who I communicated with, yes it's the same, and believe it or not maybe even worse. Imagine that! The one who I have kept a relationship with told me that she was on the verge of quitting just at the point in time when I first messaged her. She's now "relieved" to be out of the "sugar bowl".

[AsianPursuits]

Yes, the site requires some hard work, that is a given. It is not cheap either. I usually get on a month and then back off for 3 months or so. It can be exhausting weeding thru all the ones on their. Honestly, I weed thru a lot of girls on SA. Fortunately, I can usually get a vibe of where it is going in the first few messages..

I wonder if this is the same looking from the SB side. I think there is a high burnout on girls that join hoping it will be easy money and then get bombarded with dick pics.

[AmericanPi]

I appreciate the depth of your reports. And your transparency.

I have to say, I've had a totally different experience than you.

I normally use SA in somewhat poorer countries (Mexico, Greece, Bolivia, etc). And I'm pretty generous with my offers. Usually 300-350 dollars to join for dinner and action afterward. And I'm not too bad looking, though I'm middle aged.

But my experience is quite different. I hit up girls in the 18-25 range. Usually a canned paragraph- I'm coming to your city for work, looking for some cool company, etc. About 50 pct write back, and I suspect it's only that low because I don't have a profile picture up. Then I quickly try to get to offer time so nobody's wasting time. Of those I offer, about 25 pct bite. Those that don't either are expecting more, or want a long term deal, or want date 1 to be no sex, or whatever.

But still, the math on that is that 12.5 pct or so of the girls I reach out to will be a bed possibility for me.

The odds are quite good.

This is the unfortunate result when desperate Newbs backed up after 2 years of quarantine flood SA and of course "girls" take advantage of them.

For instance, this poster was initially quite reluctant and skeptical about SA, when Covid just hit.

"The sugar baby thing isn't for me! Reminds me of tutes asking me to tip them just because they spent some of their invaluable time to chatting with me. " this was on 5/12/20.

But in.

http://www.internationalsexguide.nl/...781&viewfull=1#post2642781..

[Bdb013]

I'm not a hater. I'm a realist. And as most people who claim to have gained much benefit from the site say, that hasn't come from "a little effort". Not even "a lot" if you ask me. We're talking a "herculean effort" to find a few diamonds buried in stinky shit (Steve's own words). I have better ways to use my time. Now, if one has the money, the time, and a passport then head for over the seas where "tuting" (as Mr. Ho puts it) is legal. Believe this. But don't talk to me about "effort". I worked like a dog at it for three months. Seeking.com won't reap another thin dime of my money to help support their fraud-filled site! No way, no how!

Yes, the site requires some hard work, that is a given. It is not cheap either. I usually get on a month and then back off for 3 months or so. It can be exhausting weeding thru all the ones on their. Honestly, I weed thru a lot of girls on SA. Fortunately, I can usually get a vibe of where it is going in the first few messages. If she won't give me her number to text in the first few messages, cull. If they ask for money up front, cull. If they are not interested in meeting in the next few days, cull. If they want to do SC or KIK, cull. It is true that only 10-20% on the site are legit prospects and it is time consuming trying to find them. I often get frustrated but quickly remind myself of the pot at the end of the rainbow. The few really good ones I have found have made it worth the effort for me.

[The Cane]

So, do I have a certain disdain for Seeking.com? Oh you better believe I do! But hate? LOLOLOL! That's just silly and too strong a word. "Hate" is an all-consuming thing that only brings you down with it. I have more useful things to spend my time thinking about and moving me on to action versus draining my batteries hating Seeking.com. I'm actually glad that I spent that three months on the site though. I met a great girl out of it. And now I know, and no need to ever wonder "what if". For those of you who love it great! For those of you who hate it don't. It's not that important believe me. And for those of us who have total disdain for it? Let's just be moving it on.

[The Cane]

This is the unfortunate result when desperate Newbs backed up after 2 years of quarantine flood SA and of course "girls" take advantage of them.

For instance, this poster was initially quite reluctant and skeptical about SA, when Covid just hit.

"The sugar baby thing isn't for me! Reminds me of tutes asking me to tip them just because they spent some of their invaluable time to chatting with me. " this was on 5/12/20..

Like I said, I experienced the highs and the lows. I went into it as kind of a three-month experiment, not as a "desperate newb" as you put it, so you know what you can do with that. If I liked it, I would continue with it, and if I didn't then I would stop it. I said that I would share my experiences with three field reports summing up my time as a member, and I did exactly that in a very open and honest and emotionally raw way, with the hope that it would give all reading one person's real world take on what it's like to use Seeking.com. I give thanks to you for zealously spending your time summarizing my posts as you did as that pulls the whole three months together quite nicely. I could not have done a better job myself. Mission accomplished!

But, I must say that there's nothing "unfortunate" about it or something to "hate". Don't be so dramatic. It's not that important to me in my life LOL! It is what it is, and now I'm happily moving on after three solid months of working it with 100's and 100's and 100's of contacts. That's hardly "spiking the ball" after the first score, then walking away after the first "fumble". I don't have those traits in me as a person, and that's not how I live my life. If I did, I never would have achieved the successes in life that I have. It takes "sticktoitiveness" to have success obtaining many things in life worth having. But, it also takes knowing when it's time to cut bait and follow another direction in order to achieve your goals. I know when and how to do that. So, this piece of what you wrote (essentially being a quitter) is nothing more than a mean-spirited mischaracterization of what I did. You actually know nothing of the hours I gave to this. Then too, it's a relatively expensive "dating" site where I think it behooves one to to do a cost-benefit analysis as to whether or not to turn off the spigot sooner rather than later. Three months of Seeking.com getting my money was enough time in my estimation. As wealthy people know, what you keep is as important as what you earn.

This is something that, like you say, I did out of curiosity. But curiosity didn't kill the cat! In your pointers about a tragic lesson, you totally left out the full epilogue. The fact that I did meet one great girl on Seeking.com who I'm still seeing today. She meets all of my physical criteria, we get along great, the sex is at the pinnacle of monger success (BBCIP), and all at a cut rate price too! And I can honestly say that we have become real friends, and I expect that we will remain that way for some time. So yes, I'm saying goodbye to Seeking.com. She did too by the way! But, we haven't said goodbye to each other. And we're both so, so grateful that through it all we found each other. We both know how hard it is to find somebody "real" on Seeking. And this gets to the true core of the lesson to be learned here, without a need for all of the lengthy analysis. Yes, you can have success on Seeking.com, but from my perspective you have to put in way too much work over way too long of a period of time, and all on a service platform that is quite expensive for its particular industry. Making the return on investment not worth it. At least not to me. But don't cry for me mongerdom! This isn't the play "Death of a Monger". When the time is right, I will be returning to doing what I do. No stripclubs, no swinging, no Seeking. No, I'm talking flying all around the world easily fucking pretty girls in the ass. I know who I am. And that's the kind of ROI I "seek".

[AsianPursuits]

I hope any of you with experience from London can give me some good advice?!

She sent me one longer msg. Prt scr attached. And then we moved to Wapp.

My experience from years of receiving internet messages is that when the communication style changes it means the person is lying or scamming.

[Nirec]

Had a amazing experience with an SB. Before my account expired I messaged some girls and got their numbers. I was up front, and most did not reply back except for one. We met up for dinner and drinks, then headed back to my place after. It was BBFSCIP. Had her lay belly down on the bed and fucked, damn her pussy was so tight. Pulled her legs close against me and went at it in doggy for a bit. I put her on top of me in cowgirl and had her ride me until she came. Then switched to missionary and half came inside her pussy then pulled out and finished the rest on her body. She told me she is on BC so crisis adverted.

This was one if not the best arrangement I had so far and will probably meet her again. Even though this was a great experience and no golden pussy syndrome. I'm not renewing my membership until I travel outside the country. In the US I got with 4 girls in the past 3 months and like others said it was a ton of work and hours spent. Two of them were great and I will meet with again.

[Pessimist]

This is the unfortunate result when desperate Newbs backed up after 2 years of quarantine flood SA and of course "girls" take advantage of them.

For instance, this poster was initially quite reluctant and skeptical about SA, when Covid just hit.

"The sugar baby thing isn't for me! Reminds me of tutes asking me to tip them just because they spent some of their invaluable time to chatting with me. " this was on 5/12/20.

But in.

http://www.internationalsexguide.nl/...781&viewfull=1#post2642781.

"I've decided to look into SA starting in 2022. One thing I would like to know is this. Typically how many duds do you have to wade through before you find one girl that you vibe well enough with that you end up bedding her? I know this is something we all have to work at, but you seem to enjoy yourself, and you've been successful. So give me a rough number of how many encounters on average for you to find a gem who delivers the kind of experience you're looking for. Is it 10,15, or 20? More? Please keep it real."

OK, good, this was a realistic question.

Then the initial giddiness.

http://www.internationalsexguide.nl/...704&viewfull=1#post2647704.

"After being on SA for just a short while, I have a few observations to make. First of all, I don't know about anywhere else, but in my town, there are some damn fine ass black girls on that site! I'm talking smoking! And I'm not even into black girls that much. Brother Steve, if this is what you been fucking, then man I can see why you are one happy man. I got to take my hat off to you. Just damn! Second, there is a plenty of what I like the most too. And that would be young, blonde, white, and tight! I haven't had a full membership for even a whole week yet, and already I have my first meet and greet set up with a real cutie! Wow! We've already exchanged photos, been on the phone, and everything! And she knows I'm not looking for just "platonic."

I mean, am I in a dream? I thought I could have some success with this thing, but not like this so fast! I mean, she's almost too good to be true! And you know what they say about that. I'm trying not to look a gift horse in the mouth here!

And then the inevitable comedown.

http://www.internationalsexguide.nl/...475&viewfull=1#post2687475.

"As you will recall, I signed up for a three-month premium membership, which actually ended a few weeks ago. And to be perfectly honest, I couldn't wait! A big thumbs down to Seeking.com from me! And the reason? Well, at least in the United States, the site is just infested with fakes, flakes, fraudsters, and scammers. It's just overwhelming and totally ruins the experience. Seeking is out of the question for me going forward, along with the other two "S's". That would be stripclubs and swinging."

Honestly, this is a textbook example of initial skepticism, to curiosity, then euphoria, then disappointment, and finally hatred.

I feel like the people who have used it for a while have actually given sound advice.

Steve said in one of the earliest posts in January 2020:

http://www.internationalsexguide.nl/...270&viewfull=1#post2411270.

"I am a relative Newbie at it having just pulled my first girl in June. But I've pulled 15 girls since June and had some awesome experiences, many of which I can and will share here. IMO in the US it's the only way to fly tho I have had a good experience in London and Buenos Aires also.

The key point is it does in fact take a ton of time, which I don't mind. I typically start my search for the perfect girl about a month ahead of visiting a given city and am on SA every night. If you like chatting with girls and finding the gems in the pile of BS like I do (there is something viscerally satisfying about it) then it's not work but part of the fun."

I said the following in late January 2020:

http://www.internationalsexguide.nl/...654&viewfull=1#post2416654.

"I have been with SA on and off for 4 years. Mostly on, and when I was off, I tried secret benefits and a couple of other sites but SA has been my best site for a while. The biggest problem is the sheer number of fakers, no sex girls, girls looking for online only arrangements, and many outright scammers. It is a lot of work. But I the end it is all rewarding if you get hold of some good girls. The good news is that over time you build your database. Now I have several dozen girls in my stable so to speak."

I know MW, Elvis, several others who are experienced SDs have provided sound advice too. All of it documented, easily searchable.

On Jan 2, 2022 I said this:

http://www.internationalsexguide.nl/...008&viewfull=1#post2646008.

"I don't disagree there is a high amount of flakiness and if anything, it has increased massively since the pandemic.

That said, I don't disagree that SA is a lot of work. I used to think success rate is 5% to 10% at most, now it is probably 2%. I. E. If I send a "Hello, how are you?" message to 100 girls, the chance that I will actually fuck one of them is 2/100, AT the price point I want to. Even if I went up to $500 or more, the chance only increases to 10% to 20%. Nearly 50% or more of the "girls" on SA are absolute scammers, thieves."

In Jan'2022 I said the following.

http://www.internationalsexguide.nl/...468&viewfull=1#post2646468.

"I would say, 30% or more are total scammers. I. E. They might be dudes sitting in some foreign country looking to scam some money off horny US gentlemen.

At least a third or more will not have sex whatsoever. Platonic only. Nearly 80% of 18-20 age group falls into this category. Most of them do not even want to meet. Some of these girls can be totally clueless.

I'd say, the remaining (may be a third) are open to meet, perhaps to sex. Since I don't outright ask for sex due to concern about sting operations, it is always somewhat implied, never stated. I typically ask to meet for a drink / coffee meet. Here, many discussions break down. Quite a few want upfront payment for the intro meet. "why should I meet you and spend time if I don't get compensated" is a common refrain.

The change I have seen is that prepandemic to now, the percent demanding upfront payment has spiked up a lot. Very puzzling because so many are broke and need money.

Some of them are full of themselves. "my time is of value" they arrogantly claim.

That leaves really 10-20% who are truly interested and will meet and have sex and all that; since I will always have a allowance negotiation prior to a intro coffee meet, and with my strict discipline, I lose quite a few there."

The problem is that if you are the Newb type who will spike the ball after scoring a first down but leave the game after your first fumble, SA is not your thing. Experienced SA'ers knew this all along and even repeated the advice multiple times. Patience gets rewarded. Enjoy the process. Take your time. Don't pay up, don't get emotional; when things are low, keep your chin up and when things are high, don't strut and dance. These are good things to keep in mind in life, and definitely true on SA.

[Elvis 2008]

Summing it all up, I ended up meeting three girls over my three month "experiment". I could have met at least a couple of more for sure, but I backed out due to distance. They were both like an hour and a half away each, and I just decided it wasn't worth the drive. One of those I'm sure was a straight up prostitute. I asked her about anal, and she said she would try (that means "no" and was just a weak attempt to keep somebody on the hook). Of the three I did meet, one we decided right off the bat to keep it platonic. Another I could have fucked, but although she was cute in her own way, I simply was not "stirred' by her sexually. So, I just never followed up after a nice dinner out with her. And of course, the other was my "grand slam home run" who I wrote about in my very first report. But in the end, simply too much work for too little return. Seeking is out of the question for me going forward, along with the other two "S's". That would be stripclubs and swinging.!

Sure, the yield getting sugar babies from strip clubs was higher than seeking, and I went bare with the strippers more often that not. The downside to them is you cannot get that intimate with them. They have been trained to milk as much as they can out of guys. The seeking women were harder to find but IMO of better character.

Thing is I would really get like one date a month from seeking in the USA, one a day in Mexico, and in Colombia, it was like three per day. So I get giving it up in the USA. The real value though IMO is abroad.

[Elvis 2008]

Elvis. From an ISG point of view guys on ISG / SA / Seeking. Are probably NOT looking for platonic deals. If they are looking around S. America on SA. They know P4 P is very possible and can, might, should. (we hope) LOL end up with the whole package.

I am not talking platonic. I just posted on another forum that you have to cast a wide net and have a short memory. I will never have a SB who is bad in the sack. I get them in the sack as quick as I can to see if they are SB material or not.

Well that's my current story, flight attendant, perfect English.. blonde, 35 years younger, sex is a natural phenomenon not some negotiating tactic. where do I sign?

If you can find one that can satisfy you, that is the ultimate to me. You said that Seeking was way better than ho sex, and that is something I knew to be true as well. The girl cares about you for money but also likes you.

When you go exclusive, the sex you are having and the intimacy is at a whole new level. The sex I had at the SB level was great but when I went exclusive, it was the next level up. My woman gives me everything she has now, and it is the best sex I have ever had in my life.

Temptation flares a little when my gal is not around but when I am with her, I do not care to be with anyone else. If you feel like you are not missing out on anything when you are with your gal, then I would go for exclusivity. In marriage you are giving up seeing other women and getting nothing in return. With my gal and I suspect with yours, they are going to make sure you are rewarded.