Meat Loaf in Nicaragua

[Dirty Willy]

As far as they’re concerned gringos are rich and if they take your last penny you can always go back to the USA where money grows on trees and get some more.

This is really funny. I had a taxi driver taking me around in Managua. First place he took me was 'Vale Todo'. It has a new name now, but it should be called 'Vale la mierda'.

I was explaining to him at one point how money grows on trees in the US and that if you need money you just go and shake a tree. I was looking at him as I was explaining this and thinking 'Is he really taking me seriously?'. He just kind of listened in silence and this was about the only time I was around him that he wasn't talking.

[Meat Loaf]

Fellas', I know that when you arrive in Nicaragua you want to monger with Meat Loaf. I can't blame you.

The reality of my postings is that I work everyday! While the Nicaraguan does not work; while the Gringo plans and prepares his / her 1-week vacation in Nicaragua; while the Nicaraguan waits for those Gringos to bring regalos, Meat Loaf works everyday up to 18-hours per day!

I do and would enjoy sharing time with you lurkers and Senior Members, but I live here and work everyday! I'm not retired nor am I palmado (ie. poor; broke).

Hence, over time and if everything works out, we can monger, but otherwise I have to work just as you do on the plantation (ie. Corporate America / Europe).

Enjoy your visit!
Meat Loaf

[Meat Loaf]

meat loaf:

thank you very much for the induction into the managua mongering hall of fame. when i first took up residence in central america during my tender years i arrived full of great expectations. like all good americans i was ready to volunteer for and pull caballo. i observed my compatriots pulling caballo. i didn’t question the paradigm until the “el nene” incident. the el nene incident involved the fleecing of one of my gringo countrymen. it opened my eyes to the reality of central america and awakened me to the fact that one cannot survive here with a weak dick. many gringos get lost in the pussy bonanza and they forget that there’s no love in this game. in a region of the world where every day is about survival there really is no such thing as square pussy. through experience and observation i learned about pulling caballo and taking pussy back to paradise. unselfishly i have shared this knowledge with those who care to take heed.

el nene was a gringo assigned to central america as a result of his employment. he was married back in the us but like so many gringos he could not resist the flavor of the local vicho. in no time he was bare backing the local vichos balls deep. then one day this chica told him that she was pregnant and he was the father. el nene thinking that he was smart sent her to get a pregnancy test at the local health clinic. she returned with a paper confirming a positive pregnancy test. he wrung his hands and held his head not knowing what to do. how would he tell his wife back home that he had fathered a bastard child abroad? the chica began fleecing el nene. with one story after another she made him give her money for medical exams, doctor’s visits, vitamins and good food to ensure the health of his unborn child. she also needed money to buy clothes and disposable [CodeWord131] in preparation for when she would give birth. every pay day she would arrive and break el nene. he never had a penny left in his pockets after sending money home to his family and turning over the rest to his pregnant chica.

time wore on and the chica got fatter and fatter but her belly didn’t seem that big. she told el nene that it was a boy and she was carrying it low. el nene was short on cash so he got some lumber and began to construct a cradle himself. apparently, he’d learnt some carpentry at home. he started collecting an assortment of toys, blankets and a basinet. as the third trimester approached he decided to break the news to his wife. the result was swift and predictable. his wife sued for divorce.

approaching the ninth month the guy was an absolute mess. emotionally and financially he was a broken man. he sat his housekeeper down and told her that he was going to have to let her go because he could no longer afford her services. that was the moment that things started coming to light. the housekeeper asked him why he couldn’t afford to pay her. he told her that he had all these expenses with a baby on the way and a divorce. it was then that the housekeeper chose to reveal that the pregnancy was a scam. she told him that the chica had gotten another pregnant girl to take the pregnancy test for her using her name. the fact that he was being fleeced was common knowledge among the local cluckers. they all thought he was a sucker and he’d become the laughing stock of the town. the interesting thing was that no one told him because “they didn’t want any problems.” the housekeeper snitched because keeping the secret any longer meant a loss of income for her. self interest not morals or concern for the gringo being fleeced was her motive for revealing the scam. had el nene continued to pay her she would have never warned him.

the incident really changed my perspective on life in central america. it was possible for an entire village to be in on the fact that a gringo was being scammed and not say a word. as far as they’re concerned gringos are rich and if they take your last penny you can always go back to the usa where money grows on trees and get some more. do you have what it takes for latin american residence? will you end up being a juan bobo like el nene? will your quest for cheap latina vicho lead you down the road to perdition?

first and foremost, aspire to be a "son of a b*tch" when interacting with females. don't care about anyone beyond yourself! don't seek praise from hoes, but only p*ssy. get as many girls pregnant as possible and keep moving. don't get married. don't do sh*t until the baby is born and then do nothing. let the hoe know that she is just another girl who got pregnant by you and that you don't support the others nor will you support her.

i have a line of hoes knocking on my door to take a nutt like a champ. why? i guess they want to get pregnant 'cause i got a mansion. i don't give a f*ck.


aspire to be a real piece of sh*t and you'll acquire more vicho than you've ever dreamed. aspire to be a real piece of sh*t and your life will be smooth sailing in latin america and the west indies.

[Warbucks]

meat loaf:

thank you very much for the induction into the managua mongering hall of fame. when i first took up residence in central america during my tender years i arrived full of great expectations. like all good americans i was ready to volunteer for and pull caballo. i observed my compatriots pulling caballo. i didn’t question the paradigm until the “el nene” incident. the el nene incident involved the fleecing of one of my gringo countrymen. it opened my eyes to the reality of central america and awakened me to the fact that one cannot survive here with a weak dick. many gringos get lost in the pussy bonanza and they forget that there’s no love in this game. in a region of the world where every day is about survival there really is no such thing as square pussy. through experience and observation i learned about pulling caballo and taking pussy back to paradise. unselfishly i have shared this knowledge with those who care to take heed.

el nene was a gringo assigned to central america as a result of his employment. he was married back in the us but like so many gringos he could not resist the flavor of the local vicho. in no time he was bare backing the local vichos balls deep. then one day this chica told him that she was pregnant and he was the father. el nene thinking that he was smart sent her to get a pregnancy test at the local health clinic. she returned with a paper confirming a positive pregnancy test. he wrung his hands and held his head not knowing what to do. how would he tell his wife back home that he had fathered a bastard child abroad? the chica began fleecing el nene. with one story after another she made him give her money for medical exams, doctor’s visits, vitamins and good food to ensure the health of his unborn child. she also needed money to buy clothes and disposable [CodeWord131] in preparation for when she would give birth. every pay day she would arrive and break el nene. he never had a penny left in his pockets after sending money home to his family and turning over the rest to his pregnant chica.

time wore on and the chica got fatter and fatter but her belly didn’t seem that big. she told el nene that it was a boy and she was carrying it low. el nene was short on cash so he got some lumber and began to construct a cradle himself. apparently, he’d learnt some carpentry at home. he started collecting an assortment of toys, blankets and a basinet. as the third trimester approached he decided to break the news to his wife. the result was swift and predictable. his wife sued for divorce.

approaching the ninth month the guy was an absolute mess. emotionally and financially he was a broken man. he sat his housekeeper down and told her that he was going to have to let her go because he could no longer afford her services. that was the moment that things started coming to light. the housekeeper asked him why he couldn’t afford to pay her. he told her that he had all these expenses with a baby on the way and a divorce. it was then that the housekeeper chose to reveal that the pregnancy was a scam. she told him that the chica had gotten another pregnant girl to take the pregnancy test for her using her name. the fact that he was being fleeced was common knowledge among the local cluckers. they all thought he was a sucker and he’d become the laughing stock of the town. the interesting thing was that no one told him because “they didn’t want any problems.” the housekeeper snitched because keeping the secret any longer meant a loss of income for her. self interest not morals or concern for the gringo being fleeced was her motive for revealing the scam. had el nene continued to pay her she would have never warned him.

the incident really changed my perspective on life in central america. it was possible for an entire village to be in on the fact that a gringo was being scammed and not say a word. as far as they’re concerned gringos are rich and if they take your last penny you can always go back to the usa where money grows on trees and get some more. do you have what it takes for latin american residence? will you end up being a juan bobo like el nene? will your quest for cheap latina vicho lead you down the road to perdition?

fucking ridiculous. makes you wonder why these guys just won’t get a blood test. same shit happened to my ole home boy in the army only this was an american chick doing the fleecing. he was proud to send her a great portion of his small army chick every month thinking he was about to be a father. then one day she told him she lied just to get support. he beat her and wound up going to jail for domestic battery. the fair sex my ass…..

[Chocha Monger]

meat loaf:

thank you very much for the induction into the managua mongering hall of fame. when i first took up residence in central america during my tender years i arrived full of great expectations. like all good americans i was ready to volunteer for and pull caballo. i observed my compatriots pulling caballo. i didn’t question the paradigm until the “el nene” incident. the el nene incident involved the fleecing of one of my gringo countrymen. it opened my eyes to the reality of central america and awakened me to the fact that one cannot survive here with a weak dick. many gringos get lost in the pussy bonanza and they forget that there’s no love in this game. in a region of the world where every day is about survival there really is no such thing as square pussy. through experience and observation i learned about pulling caballo and taking pussy back to paradise. unselfishly i have shared this knowledge with those who care to take heed.

el nene was a gringo assigned to central america as a result of his employment. he was married back in the us but like so many gringos he could not resist the flavor of the local vicho. in no time he was bare backing the local vichos balls deep. then one day this chica told him that she was pregnant and he was the father. el nene thinking that he was smart sent her to get a pregnancy test at the local health clinic. she returned with a paper confirming a positive pregnancy test. he wrung his hands and held his head not knowing what to do. how would he tell his wife back home that he had fathered a bastard child abroad? the chica began fleecing el nene. with one story after another she made him give her money for medical exams, doctor’s visits, vitamins and good food to ensure the health of his unborn child. she also needed money to buy clothes and disposable [CodeWord131] in preparation for when she would give birth. every pay day she would arrive and break el nene. he never had a penny left in his pockets after sending money home to his family and turning over the rest to his pregnant chica.

time wore on and the chica got fatter and fatter but her belly didn’t seem that big. she told el nene that it was a boy and she was carrying it low. el nene was short on cash so he got some lumber and began to construct a cradle himself. apparently, he’d learnt some carpentry at home. he started collecting an assortment of toys, blankets and a basinet. as the third trimester approached he decided to break the news to his wife. the result was swift and predictable. his wife sued for divorce.

approaching the ninth month the guy was an absolute mess. emotionally and financially he was a broken man. he sat his housekeeper down and told her that he was going to have to let her go because he could no longer afford her services. that was the moment that things started coming to light. the housekeeper asked him why he couldn’t afford to pay her. he told her that he had all these expenses with a baby on the way and a divorce. it was then that the housekeeper chose to reveal that the pregnancy was a scam. she told him that the chica had gotten another pregnant girl to take the pregnancy test for her using her name. the fact that he was being fleeced was common knowledge among the local cluckers. they all thought he was a sucker and he’d become the laughing stock of the town. the interesting thing was that no one told him because “they didn’t want any problems.” the housekeeper snitched because keeping the secret any longer meant a loss of income for her. self interest not morals or concern for the gringo being fleeced was her motive for revealing the scam. had el nene continued to pay her she would have never warned him.

the incident really changed my perspective on life in central america. it was possible for an entire village to be in on the fact that a gringo was being scammed and not say a word. as far as they’re concerned gringos are rich and if they take your last penny you can always go back to the usa where money grows on trees and get some more. do you have what it takes for latin american residence? will you end up being a juan bobo like el nene? will your quest for cheap latina vicho lead you down the road to perdition?

[Meat Loaf]

"Chocha Monger" is inducted into the "Managua Mongering Hall of Fame!" Congratulations.

Although it is not evidenced that "Chocha Monger" has every stepped foot onto the soil of Nicaragua, he is nonetheless inducted. Why?

"Chocha Monger" knows Latin America! "Chocha Monger" knows how the populace and how "Chicas Nicas" manipulate Gringos. "Chocha Monger" knows how the males think and behave. "Chocha Monger" knows too much about Nicaragua and Latin America.

"Chocha Monger" knows how not to pull caballo which in itself is priceless. While other Gringos loose their faculties, "Chocha Monger" watches their demise.

"Chocha Monger" has guided ignorant Gringos for years via International Sex Forumn. These Gringos have been domesticated caballos as well as USA exported caballos.

"Chocha Monger's" list of accomplishments is legendary and his posting history is superb. While other ISG posters write dribble, "Chocha Monger" writes information that is actually useful.

"Chocha Monger" is inducted into the "Managua Mongering Hall of Fame" and joins the ranks of "DrDewman," and "Grand Pollo."

Congratulations "Chocha Monger" for your induction and keep up the stellar postings on ISG.

"Chocha Monger" is inducted into the "Managua Mongering Hall of Fame."

[Meat Loaf]

Staying true to my previous anuncio (ie. announcement), I will disclose the 3-some.

So my ex-livin's friend, morena, contacted me via cellphone. She came to the "Gringo Friendly Confines" to visit me one afternoon. She was given the tour of the mansion. She has known Meat Loaf and has dined on Meat Loaf for the entirety of my Nicaraguan existence. In the past, we shared tres platos and tres mujeres, frequently.

We shared conversation and my quest for the three livin chicass. She said cool and would enjoy being one of the three. The next thing I know she showed up the following day with "a friend." This friend didn't look like much, but two (2) puss*es in the hand is better than a dick in the other. Of course, you ISG readers always opt for the latter.

Her friend was given a tour of the mansion. Her friend inquired as to my occupation. I told her f*cking b*tches is my job and it pays well. (Mature white gotta' pay-2-play.)

While the friend was bullshitting with her legs crossed, the morena had changed into lingerie. While the friend was playing around with her cellphone, the morena got loafed on the sofa! I gave her a quick nutt and dismounted her to continue viewing television.

The morena went upstairs and I slipped some d*ck to the friend while on the sofa. I had to take that p*ssy 'cuase she was bullshittin'. I studied the p*ssy meat and admired her labia. She enjoyed sitting spread eagle for 1-hour as I watched television and her crotch.

We adjourned upstairs to view television from my California King. With one b*tch on my right and the other b*tch on my left, we viewed Chapulin Colorado. While watching Chapo, I slipped some d*ck into the morena. With d*ck deep inside of her, the friend got jealous and turned her back on me. Therefore, I took the d*ck out of the morena, rolled over, and slipped the d*ck into the friend. She had a tramp stamp that proved to be good reading. I f*cked her good as evidenced by condom breaking. With her satisfied, I rolled over and slipped some d*ck back into the morena.

The friend went to her bedroom and slept. I fell asleep inside of the morena.

During the madrugada (ie. wee-hours of the morning), I arose and walked into the bedroom where the friend slept. I grabbed her a*s and slid some d*ck into her. She was asleep, but arose when 20 centimeters entered her flesh! I gave her a nutt and returned back to my California King. A few hours later I gave the morena "a morning nutt" from the "morning wood."

I told the morena that her friend is not qualified to be a live-in chica and to look for someone else. The friend is / was too timid and I aint got time for that. She agreed and the morena came back the following day.

Just another day in the life Meat Loaf. How's your sex life?

[Meat Loaf]

I don't know how Cablenet, the #1 internet provider, acquires their bandwidth, but it appears that around the holidays they begin bandwidth management. This is to say that they purchase low capacity and begin to manipulate the service to their customers.

Since November 2009, the internet has been out of service for about 50% of the business hours (ie. 8 a.m. - 5 p.m.). It's December 2009, and they are still performing this ratoining of bandwidth.

In Nicaragua, you never know if you'll have work and that includes those with full-time guaranteed employment overseas.

[Meat Loaf]

There's a lot of money to be made in the sensationalizing of the "N-word." This Hispanic rapper went multi-platinum on it. http://mediatakeout.com/2009/21231-m...-platinum.html

My favorite part of his song(s) is when he starts the sound and shouts out: "Este es Nigga!"

Those that speak Spanish and are aware of the word's power never say his name in my presence. They simply sing the songs and voluntarily "bleep" his name within the songs.

[Meat Loaf]

loaf there's a show on the national geographic channel called "locked up abroad." it shows what happens when gringos and europeans do foolish things abroad and end up incarcerated with the local third world criminals. after the resident murderers, thieves and [CodeWord127] make love to the gringos for anywhere from a few days to several months the money suddenly appears to spring them from jail. i'm sure dui gringo had his fill of cock meat sandwiches served up by big bob. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_g9ta7ahsiu hence he fled the "gringo friendly confines" at the earliest opportunity. it never ceases to amaze me how otherwise well behaved gringos at home often try so hard to end up as guests at the local penitentiary abroad.

chocha monger,

these gringos really need to perform "a balls check" as "xdred" would say.

are they willing and ready for a buffet of dark meat in the third world? this aint the usa where "good 'ole boys" never even get arrested. this is the third world where it's guaranteed that "pale face" will get arrested, in time.

cock meat. and why not have a tossed salad while they are at it.

[Meat Loaf]

MC Lany, "Pega Pega": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrk7s...eature=related

An aspirant for agency as a (1) tagger-on or (2) gofer of Meat Loaf has been "around" for a few weeks. He runs to the store; he runs around town; he makes sure that my glasses and the glasses of my associates are always full and with ice; he's only a heckle away. This lad of forty years has twenty (20) years of residency in "Nicaragua North" (ie. Miami, Florida, USA), but is back in the "Land of Lakes and Volcanoes" to spend time with family, permanently.

While I've grown accustom to him "fetching" drinks, smokes, and pharmacy products, others are leery. Such sentiment was expressed by fellow-Gringos one recent evening.

As the aspirant went to transfer "his use" onto the Calzada, he met his match.

While fellow-Gringos shared drinks at the table, he was ensuring that the drinks were never empty nor cold. One Canadian-Gringo said, "I can pour my own damn drink!" The aspirant took offense at the tone of such statement. Next thing, the Canadian-Gringo and aspirant starting fighting. Rumor has it that the aspirant got choked with two (2) hands: Rumor has it that the aspirant threw a few left-and-right hooks knocking out Canadian-Gringo. (I don't know the truth since I was not present and am relying upon witness testimony.)

Aspirant simply wants to feel of value by serving as a "gofer" or personal / mobile waiter. Canadian-Gringo didn't like it. Canadian-Gringo is not as "needy" / necio as Meat Loaf in that he doesn't travel with a personal "wait staff."

"I Can Pour My Own Damn Drink!"

[Meat Loaf]

meat loaf:

you've been awfully silent these past few days. i guess that thick 'n juicy chica nica is serving you tres platos diaro so you don't have time to post. so what's the story on the mature white tourist getting loafed?

loaf there's a show on the national geographic channel called "locked up abroad." it shows what happens when gringos and europeans do foolish things abroad and end up incarcerated with the local third world criminals. after the resident murderers, thieves and [CodeWord127] make love to the gringos for anywhere from a few days to several months the money suddenly appears to spring them from jail. i'm sure dui gringo had his fill of cock meat sandwiches served up by big bob. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_g9ta7ahsiu hence he fled the "gringo friendly confines" at the earliest opportunity. it never ceases to amaze me how otherwise well behaved gringos at home often try so hard to end up as guests at the local penitentiary abroad.

there's a lot of money to be made in the sensationalizing of the "n-word." this hispanic rapper went multi-platinum on it. http://mediatakeout.com/2009/21231-m...-platinum.html

chocha monger,

i've been busy at work implementing a new product line and therefore haven't been too eager to write this dribble on isg.

thick-and-juicy couldn't take too much d*ck so i haven't talked to her lately. maybe i'll try soon. when you have good d*ck the girls always remember.

i'm too tired to write anything of substance. when the alcohol wears off, one realizes that they are in nicaragua.

isg senior member is "in-country" and we have plans to attack vichos.

[Chocha Monger]

meat loaf:

you've been awfully silent these past few days. i guess that thick 'n juicy chica nica is serving you tres platos diaro so you don't have time to post. so what's the story on the mature white tourist getting loafed?

loaf there's a show on the national geographic channel called "locked up abroad." it shows what happens when gringos and europeans do foolish things abroad and end up incarcerated with the local third world criminals. after the resident murderers, thieves and [CodeWord127] make love to the gringos for anywhere from a few days to several months the money suddenly appears to spring them from jail. i'm sure dui gringo had his fill of cock meat sandwiches served up by big bob. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_g9ta7ahsiu hence he fled the "gringo friendly confines" at the earliest opportunity. it never ceases to amaze me how otherwise well behaved gringos at home often try so hard to end up as guests at the local penitentiary abroad.

there's a lot of money to be made in the sensationalizing of the "n-word." this hispanic rapper went multi-platinum on it. http://mediatakeout.com/2009/21231-m...-platinum.html

[Meat Loaf]

I had Thanksgiving Dinner 2009, at the home of fellow-Gringos. It was a nice experience and meal. Everyone knew everyone and the guests were from Europe, Canada, U.S.A., and Nicaragua.

At dinner we had all of the traditional courses with one exception. The exception was when the hosts instructed the guest to "get in line" for the sides as the meat courses are placed on the table. I looked like a deer in headlights: I, Meat Loaf, prepare my own plate of food? I'm accustom to having the maid, for years, prepare my plates of food. For all I do is delegate instructions to staff / employees worldwide.

Somehow I came up with the courage to fix my own plate. It wasn't that hard, but uncomfortable.

Thanksgiving is a beautiful vacation in Granada if you know Gringo-residents in Granada.

[Meat Loaf]

A Gringo who enjoys drinking was rolling the streets of Nicaragua. He had a car accident that caused damage to a concrete house, vehicle, and some secondary possessions. The police arrived on the scene.

In Nicaragua, the parties of a car accident get escorted to the nearest police station to file the report. You are required by law to have car insurance and the damage to property must be "paid for" at the scene / at the police station. If not, you sit in jail!

Gringo didn't have the appropriate insurance, if any, and had to sit in jail for approximately 1-week as he aquired the US $40,000 to compensate the injured parties (ie. homeowner; vehicle owner; legal expenses).

Gringo received a US $25,000 bank wire from his power-of-attorney. Gringo took US $2,000 Visa cash advances each day, his maximum, for the next eight (8) days. Gringo produced US $40,000 within one-week. (And you wonder why foreigners think Gringos are rich: Could you come up with US $40,000 within one week?)

Gringo hit the streets telling his story and fled the "Gringo Friendly Confines" soon after.