View Full Version : Tips for Dating Colombianas

09-24-08, 18:52
Originally posted by Paul Frankl and reposted here to negate the need to have members continiosly repost it throughout the forum.


I just read this post on Craiglist and thought that everyone cold benefit from reading it before going to Colombia. Keep the "big brain" engaged!

1. If she always talks about a sick child or relative. Be afraid

2. She would only leave her life of a strip dancer, hooker or "bar maid", if she had the money to go back to school. Be afraid.

3. If she asked for money like a wife when she's only a fiance or girlfriend. Golddigger comes to mind.

4. If she has children and she asks you for help with them, you have to wonder where's the dad? And if he's still alive. Why did she give this man more than one child. Well this equals bad judgement. This is a bad indicator

5. If she has a circle of friends and relatives that are unfaithful and put "cachos" on their boyfriends. Guess what. You "girlfriend" is one of them cachistas you fool.

6. If you find out you are NOT her first gringo/british/other boyfriend. RUN

7. If she asks you for money or a gift and it's not the amount or the quality she asked for. If she's less than overjoyed. She's an ingrate and you've learned a lesson VERY cheaply.

8. If she suggests marriage within the first 3-5 months. Run

9. If you suggest marriage and she wants to stay in country. RUN FASTER

10. If she asks to buy property under both names. Don't even look back.

11. If her friends are all hooked up with foreign boyfriends. Baby. I GUARANTEE she has another one on tap just in case.

12. If you have access to her email, online profile or dating service account because she "trusts you" and to prove that she has no secrets or anything to hide. Think again. She's has more than one profile STUPID.

13. If you ALWAYS pay the bill for food or vacations or whatever and does not make some attempt to pick up the bill once in a while. Man. She's riding you. I don't care how poor a person is. Dignity has no price. You are not a fucking WALLET.

14. If you invite her out to a meal and she brings relatives or a friend and you pick up the tab and she makes no effort to have these deadbeats put in something in the pot to pay the bill. YOU ARE OFFICIALLY A PENDEJO MARRANO. And they are laughing their asses off at your expense.

I'll give you an example. "hey prima. What are you doing tonight". She says "nothing. Going out with the gringo tonight. ". They answer back "can we come. We're hungry and we know the wallet will take care of us. Hahahahahah". She answers. " no sean malo con mi gringo. Ok. Meet us at so and so".

15. If she does or go to different places when you're stateside. Ask yourself why she didn't do or go to those places when you were there.

16. If you constantly call to see if she's home on the weekends and if she's not there you become suspicious. YOU ARE IN AN UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP and she has a local novio you moron.

17. If you don't speak the language and have locals vouch for your woman. (this is a new one I heard about a while ago in the DR). The one vouching is probably screwing your girl.

18. If she's way younger than you and you're less than attractive, out of shape and bald. She doesn't love you because you're one of the nice ones and not like those mean Colombian men that don't know how to treat a lady. In other words. Have no money.

Be a realist man. If she's a piece of ass. You nail it. You don't marry it. She's not diggin' your bald head. She's diggin' the bald eagle on your currency and passport.

19. If she's always hanging out with a male cousin (this is very much the case in the DR too. Hahahaha. God you have to give it to the gringo brothers). It's not a cousin. It's a boyfriend.

20. And finally. Don't ever. Ever. Ever help your Colombian girlfriend get a tourist, student or work visa.