Sosua Reports

[quote=conquerorval; 1442404]interesting you say that. imho, it appears that none of the other threads bash their location and service providers as much as sosua. quite a few reports describe sosua in very unflattering terms. it seems like some members have a love and hate relationship with this place. mind you i can compare it only to threads that i have read which are mostly asian and european.

surely, its better than north america (except mexico maybe) and sosua may have even less to offer in few years from now.[/quote]this is true and i have noticed the same thing.

i think it is still possible to find some girl friend type girls in sosua, but guys are very ambivalent about what they want. some want girls who will make love like lovers, and yet they still want to avoid any kind of intimacy and don't want to work on the relationship.

when i first came to the dr ten years ago, the attraction was always that it was possible to have relationships with attractive young women who were not like stereotypical drug-taking, cigarette-smoking, alcoholic prostitute of the type one would find on the internet in the us. for the most part this was true. how often will you see middle-aged men dining with young prostitutes in restaurants in the us, or dancing with them in discos?

i have always traveled alone, but these days it seems quite common for men to travel in pairs or in groups and be very concerned about the opinion of their peers. not only does this affect their ability to get into relationships, but it also blocks the total immersion experience in the spanish language and dominican culture. anxiety about sex is also managed by heavy drinking of alcohol.

although i am not actively involved in the sosua bar sex scene these days, i do think that what was available before is still available if you just look for it. i was told the other day by a seriously cute 19-year-old that she loves me and she wants to be my novia. even though this is obviously complete bullshit and the novia thing will never happen, these flattering words still fall pleasingly on the ear, because few men of over 60 have the opportunity to turn down a 19-year-old. i also have a very attractive married woman of 33 in a long-running flirtation that could probably be consummated if i really wanted. i know a very attractive girl of 18 who is probably a virgin and who would like nothing better than a nice, reliable boyfriend who would give her a bit of financial help to continue going to school, chat on the internet, take her out for dinner, buy her a few clothes, etc.

[quote=forcesteeler; 1441950]i find that the worst you treat these dr chica's the more they like you and respect you.

if you treat them like a queen they will run all over you and try to scam you as much as they can. when i treat them like the bottom of my shoe, deep down they respect me more. i guess deep down alot of these girls have low self esteem issues.[/quote]the problem is that if you treat them badly so that they will respect you more, does this really lead to a harmonious relationship, or will you hate yourself for picking a chica who makes you behave this ugly way? can you give an example of this therapeutic mistreatment and how it works without causing underlying resentment or public embarrassment? would you ignore her birthday and give her extra chores instead while you go out with another woman?

sorry if i sound thick, but i always like concrete examples of situations versus abstract theories.

Frannie, ask her what being your novia entails. LOL.

[QUOTE=Mr Enternational;1442556]Frannie, ask her what being your novia entails.[/QUOTE]I don't need to ask. It means meeting her ever escalating demands for money for various projects that she will reveal in the course of time in exchange for sex which will be good at first, but subject to the laws of diminishing returns. Being a novia also implies exclusive sex without condoms, though she would take the pill.

Being a novia could just mean being a girlfriend in a straightforward sense for a single man without other domestic commitments. The word "novia" in Spanish can mean "girlfriend" or "mistress", but it can also be translated as "fiancee" or as "bride" depending on the context.

[quote=frannie; 1442548]the problem is that if you treat them badly so that they will respect you more, does this really lead to a harmonious relationship, or will you hate yourself for picking a chica who makes you behave this ugly way? can you give an example of this therapeutic mistreatment and how it works without causing underlying resentment or public embarrassment? would you ignore her birthday and give her extra chores instead while you go out with another woman?

sorry if i sound thick, but i always like concrete examples of situations versus abstract theories.[/quote]i too would like to see some examples. in the states, it's quite common to hear some men claim that women give thugs and bad boys more respect and their attention than guys that are nice. maybe thats the direction he's going?

[QUOTE=Wrx2005;1442581]I too would like to see some examples. In the states, it's quite common to hear some men claim that women give thugs and bad boys more respect and their attention than guys that are NICE. Maybe thats the direction he's going?[/QUOTE]I think there is a certain amount of truth in the sense that women respect men who are assertive, but that is not quite the same as treating them badly. For example if I tell her that I want to watch golf on TV for four hours on a Saturday, and then I stick to that program so that she can't watch her beloved novellas, then she will respect that. But that is quite different from, say, taking the card from the cable box when I leave the house, so that she cannot watch her novellas when I am gone. I think that would just make her angry and not earn respect.

I don't know if women "respect" thugs and bad boys, but certainly there are types of women who get into unhealthy relationships with criminal types, usually due to low self esteem, financial dependence, and lack of a viable alternative. There was an interesting case in the UK recently when a guy who was in and out of prison murdered a girl of 12 in an apparent sexual attack and hid the body in the attic. The guy was the boyfriend of the grandmother, but had also had had a relationship with the mother, who lived in the same house. One would ask why the women would bother with such a loser, but of course the answer is that they are also big time losers and have a string of these guys so they can get sex, money, drugs, etc.

See this and note the picture of the dead child's real birth father, a former boyfriend of the mother.

[url]http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2326870/Stuart-Hazell-Tia-Sharp-murderers-self-pitying-letters-jail-reveal-upset-nasty-stuff-said-prisoners.html[/url]

This doesn't exactly fall under treating a chica badly to get respect or to be liked. But I was supposed to meet a chica on Skype this morning (9 am ). Chica never showed up. 17 minutes later, I sent her a text letting her know I was online at 9. (I was doing other things, so it wasnt a big deal. ) "Since you didn't show I'm going to take care of important things." Chica texts me right away to tell me that she is sorry, she's online now. Now I know better. She was probably on Skype with one of her other customers, and didn't finish with him fast enough. Even if she wasnt, she was late. Now I could have easily got back on Skype to chat. But IMO that would of sent the message that she can do that anytime, followed by the same lame "excusame mi amor".

Moreover, she needs to realize, that if she is going to be late, then give me a courtesy call. I told her this before. She obviously don't have a problem using her minutes, because she called and texted me when I told her I wasnt waiting. IMO it's the subtle forms of disrespect or inconsideration thats tolerated from these chicas that leads to much bigger forms of the same.

Now when there is money involved, some of these chicas still can fuck up a good thing. You tell a chica a time to get together, and they show up 2 hours later, and you still are waiting for her? That sets a bad example. I have a buddy that met a chica on her scooter at the Playero. She was 2 hours late. Kept playing phone tag until she got there. What we suspect, she was handling other client (s) and couldn't really come on time, so she was stalling my buddy.

When the chica finally got there, (after turning down viable offers from other chicas) her performance was whack and hurried. He was very dissapointed in her and in himself. So that day he should have learned a lesson of not allowing a chica to hustle you for your time and money. What he should have done, was go to plan B find another chica, ignore the chicas calls. Or tell her straight up on the phone that he made other plans. She may not learn a lesson, because she don't give a shit, but at least you aint allowing yourself to be stalled, and worse, have a bad session.

[QUOTE=Wrx2005;1442592]So that day he should have learned a lesson of not allowing a chica to hustle you for your time and money. What he should have done, was go to plan B find another chica, ignore the chicas calls. Or tell her straight up on the phone that he made other plans. She may not learn a lesson, because she don't give a shit, but at least you aint allowing yourself to be stalled, and worse, have a bad session.[/QUOTE]Yes, that is exactly what he should have done.

[QUOTE=Wrx2005; 1442592]This doesn't exactly fall under treating a chica badly to get respect or to be liked. But I was supposed to meet a chica on Skype this morning (9 am ). Chica never showed up. 17 minutes later, I sent her a text letting her know I was online at 9. (I was doing other things, so it wasnt a big deal.)"Since you didn't show I'm going to take care of important things." Chica texts me right away to tell me that she is sorry, she's online now. Now I know better. She was probably on Skype with one of her other customers, and didn't finish with him fast enough. Even if she wasnt, she was late. Now I could have easily got back on Skype to chat. But IMO that would of sent the message that she can do that anytime, followed by the same lame "excusame mi amor".

Moreover, she needs to realize, that if she is going to be late, then give me a courtesy call. I told her this before. She obviously don't have a problem using her minutes, because she called and texted me when I told her I wasnt waiting. IMO it's the subtle forms of disrespect or inconsideration thats tolerated from these chicas that leads to much bigger forms of the same.

Now when there is money involved, some of these chicas still can fuck up a good thing. You tell a chica a time to get together, and they show up 2 hours later, and you still are waiting for her? That sets a bad example. I have a buddy that met a chica on her scooter at the Playero. She was 2 hours late. Kept playing phone tag until she got there. What we suspect, she was handling other client (s) and couldn't really come on time, so she was stalling my buddy.

When the chica finally got there, (after turning down viable offers from other chicas) her performance was whack and hurried. He was very dissapointed in her and in himself. So that day he should have learned a lesson of not allowing a chica to hustle you for your time and money. What he should have done, was go to plan B find another chica, ignore the chicas calls. Or tell her straight up on the phone that he made other plans. She may not learn a lesson, because she don't give a shit, but at least you aint allowing yourself to be stalled, and worse, have a bad session.[/QUOTE]I might tell a chica I see at say D'Latinos I might see her there tomorrow but never specifics-They could care less about appointments and times they tell you-they go for the quick $$$$ I can't blame them-unless your a regular and even then there's no guarantee that the chica will keep any appointment at anytime-In the meantime your missing out on dozens of other opportunities

I do not let the girls control my roll. I try to be care free and amiable. The girls taylor their behavior by how I treat them which is good. I have the money which they want. The girls know that there are 100s of girls waiting for my cash. So it is in their interest to make me happy. I rarely have issues with the girls. When I vet girls I illiminate the bad apples. When I find a winner I reward her by more sessions and fun with me.

[QUOTE=Zedman99;1442611]I might tell a chica I see at say D'Latinos I might see her there tomorrow but never specifics-They could care less about appointments and times they tell you-they go for the quick $$$$ I can't blame them-unless your a regular and even then there's no guarantee that the chica will keep any appointment at anytime-In the meantime your missing out on dozens of other opportunities[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Frannie;1442586]I think there is a certain amount of truth in the sense that women respect men who are assertive, but that is not quite the same as treating them badly. For example if I tell her that I want to watch golf on TV for four hours on a Saturday, and then I stick to that program so that she can't watch her beloved novellas, then she will respect that. But that is quite different from, say, taking the card from the cable box when I leave the house, so that she cannot watch her novellas when I am gone. I think that would just make her angry and not earn respect.[/QUOTE]Thats why it would be interesting to see the examples from the poster.

[QUOTE]=Frannie;1442586]I don't know if women "respect" thugs and bad boys, but certainly there are types of women who get into unhealthy relationships with criminal types, usually due to low self esteem, financial dependence, and lack of a viable alternative.

[url]http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2326870/Stuart-Hazell-Tia-Sharp-murderers-self-pitying-letters-jail-reveal-upset-nasty-stuff-said-prisoners.html[/url][/QUOTE]Many women do respect thugs and bad boys. Depends on what one means by respect. When I think of respect, I think in basic terms."Having admiration or esteem for a person." or "To show regard or consideration." And basically thats all the women are doing. Admiring or having esteem for the so-called bad boys, thugs, rough necks, (whatever term people use) but not admiring the nice guys or guys they can take advantage. Now, how much admiration or esteem a woman has, or what is considered bad or thuggish behavior in their eyes is a matter of personal preference or what they are attracted to.

[QUOTE=Zedman99;1442611]I might tell a chica I see at say D'Latinos I might see her there tomorrow but never specifics-They could care less about appointments and times they tell you-they go for the quick $$$$ I can't blame them-unless your a regular and even then there's no guarantee that the chica will keep any appointment at anytime-In the meantime your missing out on dozens of other opportunities[/QUOTE]Most of the hookups I have are pre-arranged on some level. When it comes to time, I will be flexible depending on the situation. Random chicas I don't like giving specific times when it comes to a tentative hookup. Too often more attractive options can happen at any time. I'm finding I have to exercise that now with these Dom Cupid chicas online. There's so many to choose from.

[QUOTE=Wrx2005;1442741]Most of the hookups I have are pre-arranged on some level. When it comes to time, I will be flexible depending on the situation. Random chicas I don't like giving specific times when it comes to a tentative hookup. Too often more attractive options can happen at any time. I'm finding I have to exercise that now with these Dom Cupid chicas online. There's so many to choose from.[/QUOTE]He call four chicas up tells them he'll pay the first one the money that shows up and takes care of him at a certain time. He said its funny because the one chica said "How about if I come a little earlier " he told her "Well I guess you get the $$$$$."

[QUOTE=Zedman99;1442751]He call four chicas up tells them he'll pay the first one the money that shows up and takes care of him at a certain time. He said its funny because the one chica said "How about if I come a little earlier " he told her "Well I guess you get the $$$$$."[/QUOTE]That could work well in Sosua. Except when two to four show up at the same time? And, if they were his favoritas that don't know each other, that could be more of a problem.

[QUOTE=Wrx2005; 1442737]Thats why it would be interesting to see the examples from the poster.

Many women do respect thugs and bad boys. Depends on what one means by respect. When I think of respect, I think in basic terms."Having admiration or esteem for a person." or "To show regard or consideration." And basically thats all the women are doing. Admiring or having esteem for the so-called bad boys, thugs, rough necks, (whatever term people use) but not admiring the nice guys or guys they can take advantage. Now, how much admiration or esteem a woman has, or what is considered bad or thuggish behavior in their eyes is a matter of personal preference or what they are attracted to.[/QUOTE]It depends what you mean by respect. I am very familiar with the phenomenon, but I think it depends a lot on economic situations. If the woman is financially independent she can support a man and may choose one who is a "bad boy" (usually equals drug addict, alcoholic, and unreliable employee) , because that makes her feel powerful in the relationship and that she can do something to help him get "better". I have known women who were teachers who have done this, and many women who are nurses get involved with men who are emotionally crippled or in and out of prison, because they enjoy the drama. I have also known women who work in prisons to get sexually involved with inmates.

On the other hand, if the woman is of low socio-economic status, she may get a boost by being associated with someone who appears powerful, even if he treats her very badly.

The plot of the musical and film Grease is an interesting example of the goody-goody girl and the bad boy being both attracted and repelled by each other. Danny and Sandy have an innocent summer romance at the beach, and then meet up again in high school where Danny is a tough guy gang leader with a reputation to defend, while Sandy is an innocent young woman derided by other girls as "Miss Sandra Dee, lousy with virginity."

Whether the plot is true to life is another question, as it ends up with leather gang-leader Danny arriving for the last day of school in a letterman's jacket that he has earned in track in his attempts to impress conventional Sandy by converting to a jock, while she shows up in a sexy leather suit smoking a cigarette. Anyway, it is very amusing.