Man On The Street bravo! great post. Hope to match it when I am there and buy you a beer.
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Man On The Street bravo! great post. Hope to match it when I am there and buy you a beer.
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Freeler [i]Philo, Welcome back to Phuket:D! [/i][/QUOTE]
Thank you very much ........ but I must admit that I am a bit confused. Please inform me, good man Freeler.
The Ladyboy Experience (sic)
I've read a a lot of warnings - and I thought I was aware: maybe I am not fit for this game ......
After having a major fight with my (now ex-) GF I shared a bottle of gin with a sad and lonely dutchman (same as me except from the dutch-thing). When he fell asleep I went Soi San Sabai to look for a 500'er.
I was pissed, angry and lonely - and since I have always been fascinated by ladyboys, it ended up me inviting 5 ladyboys for dinner (3 AM). They took me to a restaurant open all night. Had a great time......
Woke up 7 AM. No cash (10000). No VISA (emptied for 50000). No passport. Wonder what they put in my beer.
And after a lot of hassle with the bank, the embassy and the Immigration Office (in BKK) I fucking was fined 500 for putting my cigarette in the pavement sewer.
I must admit that I envy MOTS a little bit for his poetic nonchalance, and I am a little bit sorry that I cannot ever make it in Phuket Town. I cannot risk being killed ........
But I don't give up.
Ouch, Philo, that's taking the glorious romantic journey down the drain a bit too far! I'd presume you will probably be covered on the Visa, since it was stolen, and while the passport is definitely a major hassle, if you can get out of a disaster like that only down 12000baht or so that's a reasonably good result, considering you could have ended up not waking up at all. Gotta be careful of ladyboys, most especially in packs -- they're not something we discuss here much for obvious reasons, but I've been told by different folks in several areas of LOS that there are a fair number of ladyboys connected with Thai organized crime, being major players in some areas, such as the drug trade in the north.
Just goes to show how dangerous it can be to go embark on such an adventure when drunk. How about posting the details of the aftermath, with the bank, embassy, etc., so guys here who haven't gone though it will have a sense of what's involved?
Glad you're okay.
I will, joe_zop, tomorrow ....
And thanks for your concern.
ph
ManOnTheStreet
I am happy to see that you have changed from 'Hard Rock' to 'Rock Hard'. May I tell you - apart from this your post is breathtaking - that the MP is called 'Christin'.
Philo,
I truly appreciate the scrutiny. I will endeavor to be more accurate in future posts.
Sorry to hear about the trouble. As you stated at least you were unharmed, and I might add a lesser punter miy not have had the where-with-all to bounce back.
Nothing quite like Patong - Soi san sabai after 2 am, huh? For anyone who has not witnessed this phenomenom you really don't know what you are missing. I will cover it in an upcoming post for sure.
manonthestreet
i have to admit that when the developers sunk their teeth into the area surrounding karon they really treated the beach front property correctly. their is only one hotel on karon beach and it is 'nestled' in the southern corner [karon beach resort] leaving unobstructed beach access for all. the beach is long with perfect white sand, clean water, and the obligatory 'small' island just far enough away to invite a swim. when they turned their attention to the town they totally fucked everything up, really bad. a piecemeal of huge resorts, shantys, and shopfronts. so badly put together that the only thing i can compare it too is a novice webbuilders first crack at his 'free geocities hosted' site. complete with 35 blinking under construction signs. i hear a lot of people saying that phuket is already overbuilt and too crowded, looks like no one told the builders as they are breaking ground all over.
karon is adjacent to phuket. it is a small sleepy little beach town that would really kick ass if it weren't for the massive resorts that seclude their guests while making a big shitshow to the passerby. most in my opinion do not rate 5, 4, or even 3 stars, yet they attract visitors to the beach, the town, and to the girl bar scene. it seems there are only girl bars in karon, no go-go's, discos, or any other type of bar, for sanuk anyway.
my review covers what i have come to know as karon. an area small in size beginning at the traffic circle intersection of patak rd. east and patak rd. west [karon beach road] adjacent to the patong area and extending south to their bi-section of thai na rd and kata beach. an area not much bigger than 6 sq km. i base the area as karon simply by where the hotel names switch from 'karon beach' to 'kata beach'. this may not be the most accurate of boundaries so don't hold me to it. if one was to round up all of the girls working in karon and magically beam them to the grace hotel on a busy night it wouldn't really make a big impact in sheer numbers.
i have visited the karon nightlife scene a half a dozen times in high season and 3 times more recently in super-low-sars-season. i have to say that while it is incomparable to it's neighbor in patong, it can be fun. they are not the aggressive 'pull you into the bar' types, but rather out of the 'off the rice farm' last week 'i'm shy' mold. i took the time to speak to a good number of ladies in length, with no intention of barfining. most were bored and happy to have a falang at the bar. thats right 'a falang', as in one, at karon center, the flagship of 'bar girl activity in karon beach. while 9/11 sucked for tourism and the bali blast hit close to home, sars is crippling a good deal of small businessmen, errr, businesswoman here in karon.
once they have snagged a falang karon bargirls seem to be very territorial. one gets the feeling that most of these women get taken out for the gfe. the punters in karon don't seem to have the edge that their brothers in bkk and patong have. it's a small town so once the said punter has 'done the business' it is pretty easy for these girls to 'shadow' him. a few of the girls discussed this with me stating that they prefer to stay 'long time' meaning 'whole vacation' not just all night.
i also talked to a couple of guys. there seemed to be more than a few who had lost control of their situation and were letting it ruin their vacation. one who kept muttering, 'i can't get away from her', was especially irritating. play the victim by day, continue to shag her brains out all night long, only to wake up to a huge obstacle every morning.
q: when does 'up to you!' not mean 'up to you!'
a: when in karon beach, phuket.
if you have never been to thailand it is good to keep in mind that reality plays little part in the in superficial bar girl relations. you are able to meet a 'quality' person every now and then, but it takes a great effort and/or a shit load of luck. while there is no excuse for being an asshole, there is also no excuse for being taken advantage of. for the 'butterfly' visiting karon my advice would be to negotiate everything in advance, pay up, and have someplace 'important' to go every morning.
i've briefly summed up what i think of the town, the current mood, and some examples of what i have seen....so what fun can be had in karon?
north karon
just north of the traffic circle and along patak road east sit several venues that might just be your bag. once you get to patak soi 22, the buddhist wat, there isn't much of anything so confine your rambling to this area for the time being. just north of traffic circle on the south side of patak road east sits the gun bar, new friend bar, and suthin's kaffe house. these are perhaps the worst beer-bars on the face of the earth. new friend bar is the current holder of the record for 'ugliest katoey', ever!!!!!!
new friend bar - totally dominated by a crop of 'fresh off the rice paddie' girls. they are there every day and night barefoot and ready for action, usually watching a soap opera and awaiting the falangs that aren't coming. there are at least two cuties but no stunners. mr. ugly is unavoidable, but nice enough, and not bothersome once she/he realizes that it isn't going to happen. the decor is worth seeing as just about every sea creature known to mankind, endangered, extinct, or otherwise adorns the walls stuffed in lifelike poses. alternating between these effigies are pictures of the king making for an odd dynamic: giant sea turtle, king, king crab, king, puffer fish, king, etc. tables and chairs are all large slabs of teak and look kind of cool but are very uncomfortable. if you are in karon check it out but don't make a special trip.
suthin's kaffe house - 12 or so girls sitting outside and dancing away to boy band crap. pumping up a lot of energy into the street. step into the 'empty' bar and you are greeted by mamasan:
mamasan: 'what laby you wan'?
culturecypher: 'i just want a singha'
mamasan: 'no wan lady'?
culturecypher: 'mai, bia sing, kop khun khrap.' [no, just a singha beer, thanks]
the girls look in as if i have six heads wondering why i haven't made my selection. i sit alone making notes until finally the 'bar turd' joins me. i don't enjoy the whole 'make your selection, now!' way of doing business. i understand and deal with it when at a massage parlor, but i prefer the beer bars and go-go's where i can at least find a 'little' chemistry. i really don't enjoy visiting with the 'bar turd' and she gets the message soon enough and moves on. most girls here seemed annoyed with me and i was glad to be outta there after a couple big swigs on my singha. there were a couple of really sexy girls here. had i shown an immediate interest i am sure things may have worked out differently. the girls here were much better than in the new friend bar in sheer aesthetics.
across from the new friend bar is a small plaza with several 'upscale' beer bars. yes i know, upscale beer bar, oxymoron of the century. 6 bars form a clockwise semi circle as follows: 'bar with no name', 'skylight bar', schlusslicht bar & restaurant', 'c & m - yay bar', 'dimension bar', and 'the key bar'. this semi circle bottoms out at the whale resort and it is hard to figure out if some of the ladies here are offering services. the bars are appointed nicely, some offering food, they seem to be brand new, and are completely empty sans the occasional punter and over-balasted farang couple tsk-tsking the sanuk scene. they girls offer services at the key bar and there are a couple of winners there all day long. once again don't make a special trip.
walking north up patak road east 25 more yards you will happen upon yet another small crop of bars. they sit inside a larger plaza with a supermarket, several tailors, and the other obligatory shops offering goods that no one needs when at the beach. 'football bar', 'allies bar', 'clapton's bar', 'buzz bar', 'sunee's bon sai bar', 'belsch cafe' [sic], 'love n joy bar', and 'kon tai pub'. nothing really special here. the bars are complete with the usual craziness that accompanies the naughty nightlife scene in thailand: babies walking around in [url=http://isgprohibitedwords.info?CodeWord=CodeWord131][CodeWord131][/url] on the bar, drunken boisterous punters [yet too few], and lusty glances from fair and not so fair maidens. i was cornered in clapton's by an over aggressive homely lass that took such a liking to me that i have permanently penciled this strip off of my 'places to visit' list. she completely interfered with my research and caused a scene as i left to visit other bars, wailing and moaning. i have never experienced anything like this before. the plaza is big enough to support several squid, bbq, and som-tam motorcycle vendors. the girls from the bars come outside into the plaza and it kind of looks like there would exist a freelance scene here after hours. on two occasions i cruised by at 2-2:30am and it was slim pickens.
further up patak road east you will pass a nice temple, worth a daytime looksy, and continue on a 2-3 km stretch of deserted road to the center of karon. along the way you will pass 'angels' bar, big screen tv for football games, and several little karaoke/beer bars that have competitive rates and an ok selection of isaan farmgirls. when you come to your first intersection, luang poh chuang road you will be in front of the 'farang bar', 'asia bar', and the inappropriately named 'karma lounge'. asia bar and farang bar both make for an amusing visit, but don't expect to find the polished quality one might have come to expect when visiting a bangkok gogo bar. most of the bars on this section of road require at least a little bit of thai language abilities. expect to find three katoeys residing in karma lounge, no customers, and a good band on friday nights. the modern decoration of this lounge really clashes with the bars across the street making it an interesting corner. several freelancing ladyboys have realized this and work the street aggressively. my advice make a right turn and head down to karon center.
karon center
take luang poh chuang road all the way towards the beach and make a left turn. go about 100 meters and you will be in front of the crown jewel of karon sanuk activity. karon center is a small soi, actually two back to back, with about 20-30 bars [some already closed for low season] and about 80 girls working. it also boasts a severe lack of customers.
'why not bar, 'lady bar', 'b.s. bar', 'dengskt bodega', 'moon light bar', 'butterfly bar', 'wizard & mange bar', 'lita italian bar', 'shark area bar', 'flower night bar', 'my way bar', 'rosaalba bar', 'nong noi bar', 'kathaleeya bar', 'walhalla bar', 'marathon bar', 'orchid bar', and of course the '#1 bar'. hardly a threat to patong's business karon center does have a couple of real hotties working. while it was dead the girls seem to be in ok spirits and i have a good time whenever i visit. 'marathon bar' is strictly ladyboy, and there are several extremely [be careful] passable ladyboys working throughout karon center. adjacent to the main area is a smaller soi with a couple of venues: 'hotshot bar', 'black cat bar', 'white bar', 'friend bar', 'no name bar', 'tony bar', and several small restaurants where girls make themselves available.
some of the larger bars in these sois are closed, i expect more will be closed soon. i would recommend that you visit karon center. they have perhaps the best streetfood bbq on the island of phuket located right out front, and there are definite hotties ready to satisfy.
with the price of tuk tuk travel so expensive on phuket i wouldn't recommend karon as a sanuk destination. i have a motorbike and it is really easy to zip around from spot to spot. budget at least 500-600 baht to take a tuk tuk to all of the spots i have just laid out. the good news is that barfines are 200 baht across the board in karon, singhas 60-70 baht, heineken 70-80 baht, and in most places lady drinks cost the same amount as if you were buying it for yourself. additionally the 'karon inn cafe' has an 'all you can eat sunday brunch' for 99 baht that is most delightful after a hard night on the town in karon. if you are in phuket check it out, you can always head back to patong. consider it a diversion should you wear out your welcome in the soi's of bangla road. it is certainly the most activity on phuket outside of patong.
MOTS Pure poetry....
Although I do not share all your opinions on Karon Beach, I must admit I very much like your writing and your elegant use of the english language.
You remind me of (and if you haven't read it yet you must do) Oscar Wilde's: The picture of Dorian Gray.
What a pity he never went to Siam.....
ManOnTheStreet
keep on with your good reports.
Will try to give Phuket a shot (if possible) and buy you a drink on my next trip.
ManOnTheStreet,
Another fine post.
I should like to commend you to Governor CEO Pongpayome Vasaputi for a special award. You've certainly done more to encourage visitors to the island recently than Thaksin!
Keep up the good work. Kata next?
Happy sanuking,
TB
hey man, prices adjusted accordingly for relatively lack of participants (seems like its a bit easier here in pattaya except for Cobra Gold - and there aren't that many allowed oput at night)
just curious mind you since I probably won't get there
Although this probably should have been posted under 'General Info' here it is .....
PASSPORT AND VISA CARD (OR ...) GONE?
After having rented a car (why?: My GF wanted to go to a deserted beach for sex on the beach after I - not knowing she did not know the drink - the day before asked a waitress: 'You can make me sex on the beach?' - making my GF killing the waitress - etc. etc - TIT) I didn't bother to go to the hotel with my passport and VISA card. Definitely should have ...
The short version of the Ladyboys Fuck Farang story you will find below. I just want to add that the stuff was in a plastic bag inside my underpants :D
Called VISA 'homeland' to close card. Went to police. Police not interested - you are broke - they want to listen to a white cow who has lost her luggage only - she will tip them. Called bank. Bank say: Go Farmers Bank. Closed (time difference). Went next day. Had ID (drivers licence). Faxed to bank. Bank send B 60.000 by SWIFT. Total time: 37 hours.Total cost of telephone and fees: some B 4000. Airport: Even for domestic flights you have to have passport. 3 offices and 2 hours later having showed my police report 6 times and filled out 3 forms I can enter the plane for BKK. Embassy: Bring two passport photos and queue for 1 hour behind Thais wannabee bride, student, maiden ...... One hour later (I need to shit - my stomach is B 20 noodle soup and B 1500 Singha and Gordon's dry - and the embassy has no public toilet). Finally I get my 'Laisser Passer' (let pass) paper to get out of the Kingdom. But this is not all: You have to go to the Immigration Office (the embassy gives you a card with adress in Thai for the taxi) to get your entry visa details printed and stamped on the document. And there you have to go to an office on 4th floor - the elevator didn't work - to fill out 2 forms. Then you must go ground floor to make copies of poilce report and embassy papers. Back 4th. Deliver papers. Fill out this too. We need another copy. 10 officials. 2 working - the rest wath tv or do their hair or nails. 50 minutes later - a young australian girl crying out her heart for having her passport stolen got all the attention - you want to kill - nothing more has happened to your papers.................. Then the decorated female official make the last signature on the Laisser Passer paper. Then you fucking run clinging to your new document.
Outside Immigration Office you spit on the road: Pay 500. You smoke - ok - but if you do not take your cigarett to the litter bin: 500.
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Take the warnings seriously. Use deposit boxes, have cash and cheques as well as cards - take copy of your passport. And stay away from ladyboys (If you want to fuck one have your armed friend sitting by) :(
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I never thought I would turn out an auntie giving warnings on the net. But I still love Thailand ..........
Thanks, Philo -- though it's no fun to be an object lesson, your experience does help reinforce the message that it always pays to be careful. (Not surprising that the wheels grind so slowly -- there's nothing like giving a bureaucrat power over someone in distressing circumstances to make things slow to a crawl.) Personally, I only carry a copy and never my passport, which stays in the hotel safe, and comes out only if I need it for currency exchange or some other bank business, and then goes right back in. The few police I've had to deal with in LOS never have a problem with this. (I generally keep a copy of my passport hidden in each piece of luggage just in case, which also comes in handy if there's ever a need to prove ownership.) I never carry credit or ATM cards with me unless I'm going to use them for something -- they, too, stay locked up. My money gets carried in two separate stashes, one for just spending and pulling from and the other as a small reserve, and never more than a few thousand baht beyond what I'm going to spend while I'm out and about. Your experience is precisely why I tend to take along some money in travelers checks -- just to have flexibility in case something goes wrong.
A while back there was a post about some tourist in Pattaya and his Thai girlfriend being robbed on the beach of something like 60,000 baht in cash and more than double that on his credit card, and I could only think to myself, what kind of idiot carries 60k baht around with him? Even presuming that his "girlfriend" wasn't the one who set him up, anyone who carries that amount of cash around even at home is asking for trouble, not even considering how much money that is to the average Thai, and how enticing tourist areas are for crooks.
And, LOL, I'm gonna have to remember that "sex on the beach" bit -- a nice way to have yourself be on the right side of such a misunderstanding, with excellent potential side benefits...
Well, if you're going to manage to negotiate being an ex-pat, you'll certainly need to learn at a cheaper rate :) or your money won't last long. Hmm, with the Visa, rather than them observing you, it sounds more likely that they got you to provide them with the code while you were drugged out -- especially if you were given something like Rohypnol.
For what it's worth, I see nothing incompatible with being a romantic and taking sensible precautions: the hopeless part should be in the outlook, not the method. I freely admit to probably being far more a romantic sort than a hardcore monger type, and I've no desire to change that because it's worked for me, but I still look to cover my ass both physically and emotionally. Just because you believe in the possibility of walking on air doesn't mean you need to go jumping off tall buildings. :D
And I envy you your grand adventure, regardless of how it turns out, and wish you nothing but good luck and fortune!