Puerto Vallarta

[QUOTE=Tony1010;2029607]Hey Ossie,

If you are there when we are, we can info up.

Let us know.

Tony.[/QUOTE]Thanks Tony,

Looking forward to see you guys.

OM.

[QUOTE=OssieMan;2030111]Hello DH,

Given the benefits of the doubts, I do speak Spanish but I could tell the locals were making fun of my ascent however though my issue was that I did not do my homework and I assumed that I could impress and get a good deal negotiating in dollars. Lesson learned, this time I am using the local currency I know the dollar is $ 1 against 18.85 pesos but it fluctuates plus banks charges 0.0566% which total out 17.85 pesos per dollar.

I do appreciate your critic.

OM.[/QUOTE]I assume you mean 5.66% or .0566, not 0.056%. Is that what your bank charges you to use an ATM? If so, that seems very high. Anyway, you've now learned that always and everywhere, one is more respected using the local currency. Whoever takes the dollars would have to take a haircut to change them into pesos, so from that standpoint, it stands to reason.

Hello,

I am visiting Vallarta Friday thru Tuesday memorial day weekend. Will be staying at the ICON. Have been to PV many times so know the lay of the land for the most part. I generally frequented the red zone clubs. Tapanko and Vizzio. The times I initially went. Stayed away from Harem etc. And don't know much about King George and the other locales. I became close with and kept in touch girl at Tapanko (nice girl) and the last times I went spent time with her outside of the club for the entire weekends. We decided to party ways so now I'm getting back into the scene in a big way.

Anyone who will be there that weekend let me know and we can link up. Easy going 33 year old guy who likes to party and have a good time.

Detroiter.

[QUOTE=Detroiter83;2031239]I am visiting Vallarta Friday thru Tuesday memorial day weekend. Will be staying at the ICON. Have been to PV many times so know the lay of the land for the most part. I generally frequented the red zone clubs. Tapanko and Vizzio. And don't know much about King George and the other locales.[/QUOTE]One of the more popular daytime P4P bars is withing walking distance from the Icon. Cross the main road, turn left and walk about a block or two. Las Antorchas is on the other side of Farmacias del Ahorro.

[URL]https://www.google.com/maps/place/Las+Antorchas/@20.6513082,-105.2405329,15z/data=!4m5!3m4!1s0x0:0x79b3eda45cc2658b!8m2!3d20.6513082!4d-105.2405329[/URL]

King George is on the same side of the street as Las Antorchas, but much farther.

[URL]https://www.google.com/maps/place/King+George+Sport+Bar/@20.6656529,-105.2468077,15z/data=!4m5!3m4!1s0x0:0xcfef40c7d4de1f85!8m2!3d20.6656529!4d-105.2468077[/URL]

Both of these bars are open in the afternoon, whereas the strip clubs are only open at night.

[QUOTE=JohnDough;2031360]One of the more popular daytime P4P bars is withing walking distance from the Icon. Cross the main road, turn left and walk about a block or two. Las Antorchas is on the other side of Farmacias del Ahorro.

[URL]https://www.google.com/maps/place/Las+Antorchas/@20.6513082,-105.2405329,15z/data=!4m5!3m4!1s0x0:0x79b3eda45cc2658b!8m2!3d20.6513082!4d-105.2405329[/URL]

King George is on the same side of the street as Las Antorchas, but much farther.

[URL]https://www.google.com/maps/place/King+George+Sport+Bar/@20.6656529,-105.2468077,15z/data=!4m5!3m4!1s0x0:0xcfef40c7d4de1f85!8m2!3d20.6656529!4d-105.2468077[/URL]

Both of these bars are open in the afternoon, whereas the strip clubs are only open at night.[/QUOTE]Thank you. Do you know if King George has "takeout" like the night clubs do?

[QUOTE=Detroiter83;2031383]Thank you. Do you know if King George has "takeout" like the night clubs do?[/QUOTE]King George has rooms onsite. I don't know if they have an official takeout policy but you can chat them up and arrange to meet them later.

King George is a high class sports bar. Unfortunately the prices are also high. The following link is the only place I have found pictures of the inside.

[URL]https://www.google.com/maps/uv?hl=en&pb=!1s0x842145bee38c8faf%3A0xcfef40c7d4de1f85!2m19!2m2!1i80!2i80!3m1!2i20!16m13!1b1!2m2!1m1!1e1!2m2!1m1!1e3!2m2!1m1!1e5!2m2!1m1!1e4!3m1!7e115!4shttps%3A%2F%2Fpicasaweb.google.com%2Flh%2Fsredir%3Funame%3D105157024678689463413%26id%3D6340412484547839762%26target%3DPHOTO!5spuerto%20vallarta%20king%20george%20-%20Google%20Search&imagekey=!1e3!2s-S5tsMGccqDk%2FV_2rj87tBxI%2FAAAAAAAAIIc%2FLFIxy43sjzQadWGiDyhmvZZ2r7CrQg_lACLIB&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjWn5n5tNnTAhVO42MKHda5ANYQoioIhwEwDw[/URL]

[QUOTE=Acehi491;1952559]RCS Reliable Care Services at Paseo de Las Garzas 501-A. Near the Icon. Lupita takes care of almost all of me. 40-ish, very friendly.[/QUOTE]Hi Detroiter83- If you like massages maybe you should check this place out seeing as it's fairly close to the Icon. I'm not very familiar with that area so I don't know exactly where it is. I think the poster mentioned she charges 500 pesos for the hour. That's just for a massage though I don't know if she does extras.

[QUOTE=Jason96;2031889]Hi Detroiter83- If you like massages maybe you should check this place out seeing as it's fairly close to the Icon. I'm not very familiar with that area so I don't know exactly where it is. I think the poster mentioned she charges 500 pesos for the hour. That's just for a massage though I don't know if she does extras.[/QUOTE]That was me. No, there are no extras there, but you will get a great massage.

[QUOTE=Acehi491;2032352]That was me. No, there are no extras there, but you will get a great massage.[/QUOTE]Okay thanks. Is Lupita the only masseuse there?

[QUOTE=Jason96;2032658]Okay thanks. Is Lupita the only masseuse there?[/QUOTE]No, there is usually 1 or 2 younger ones there also. If you walk north from the ICON, go past the Oxxo store and it would be the 2nd massage place you come to on the left. Hours say 9 to 9, but I don't think they really stick to that. I usually hit it about 10 am.

Hi guys!

Ok, just got back from a quick trip to PV for a few days, and just thought I would pass on some thoughts. For you soon to be visitors, please refer to the outstanding lay-of-the-land summary by Tomjackin a few months ago. It is very comprehensive and written in painstaking detail. The logistics and prices were spot on correct, so I would refer you there for those details. I only went to a few places, so I can't comment on everything, but I just want to throw out some thoughts from a second set of eyes.

I visited King George's Sports Bar in the Marina. I can see why other people like it. It's a small bar, but surprisingly elegant inside, with a Victorian-era style decor. It is literally right next door to the Aqua strip club, which I did not visit. Its cozy, with a couple of TV's that are mostly showing soccer and music videos. On Friday night, they had a live band. I can see what they are trying to do with the place, and I like it.

If it is soccer that you want to watch, it would probably be on. But it is not a "sports bar" in the sense that they would show NFL / NHL / MLB games. If that is what you want, then I would recommend El Torito in the Zona Romantica. Its more of a traditional American sports bar where I was able to catch an NHL game.

Given the buzz that the bar gets here on ISG, I was surprised at how empty it was. There were never more than one or two other patrons each time I went. And I went on Th, Fri, and Sat nights. I did not go in the daytime. Usually 3-5 ladies, but those there were definitely attractive, all 7-9. My approach to this kind of thing, is that its not the quantity, but the quality. The only one that really matters is the one that you end up with. Believe it or not, what was more uneasy was the lack of other guys. Too much attention focused on you. It could make me feel too conspicuous and self-conscious, and if you say no to a girl, it's feels like too big a deal. It was sometimes too quiet, not enough chatter in the air. Usually the problem is too many guys, but here I would have been okay with another 3-4 guys in the bar just to loosen up the vibe.

The ladies were friendly, but professional. You have to remember that this is not a strip club, but more like an upscale singles bar, so their demeanor was appropriate. Sometimes I like it lively and raunchy, and sometimes understated. This is the latter. But definitely worth the time and resources. The place is run by a madam / mangera shorter woman who with dirty blond hair. She speaks fluent English, and has several "contacts" to check out on her phone if you desire additional or different company. She seems to run the place well. I didn't check out a lot of places, but of those that I did, this was clearly my favorite.

Later in the evenings, I did check out some strip clubs. The strip clubs don't hit their stride until about midnite, so it makes a good transition. There are three clubs that are literally right next to each other Tapankos, Vizzio, and Sahara. Seriously, the entrances face each other, and are about 30 yards apart. You could think of them as one complex. These three clubs are for locals. But I remember that when I was RTFF I was imagining this stinky skanky place, and they weren't. All totally clean, recently renovated. Think of an American mid-range strip club. Its in a type of industrial park region, but still very very safe. There is a well lit gas station at the entrance to the clubs. The prices are lower. Tapanko's, in particular, is a very popular place. Lots of local well to do's, though I suspect that most guys were there for the lapdance aspect, as opposed to something more advanced. The dancers here definitely had the heavier, bigger assed, Hispanic look, which quite frankly, is not to my liking. But if you are here to have fun with some buddies, this is the place. Vizzio and Sahara, despite their slightly more upscale look, cost the same as Tapanko, and for some reason that I couldn't figure out, were much less popular. But you can hop between clubs, as none of them have a cover charge.

The other "locals" joint that got some positive press on the forum was Mamitas. But this was the seedy boonies place that I had been dreading. Its at the end of some dirt road, with one of those cheezy lit signs with an arrow pointing toward the entrance. At 10:30 pm, zero patrons were there. I checked it out for 2 minutes, and left with the same taxi driver that took me there. He was smart enough to wait around, as he knew that I would probably not like it.

I did not check out the high end strip clubs. All the taxi drivers were really pushing Harem. But based on the price projections and cover charges that Tomjackin laid out, I didn't bother. I predicted paying the 250 peso cover charge, only to walk inside and find the club empty. You don't see a lot of people traffic outside to indicate that there a lot of people inside. King George gave me an idea of what the ladies looked like, as the girls there apparently cover both KG and Aqua. I didn't want to have my wallet needlessly emptied. 4 Play, formerly Mi Fantasia, is the only club in the Zona Romantica, but was dead empty on a Friday night at midnite. Since its so close by, if you are staying in ZR then definitely walk by and check it out, but don't make a trip out for it.

Overall, a good but not great punting destination. And I didn't even check out the higher end places, where all the so called "best talent" hangs out. The talent is certainly there, but its pricier, and the logistics can be a little complicated. That plus ripoff stories abound. In fact, I am curious as to why the prices stay so high. Except for Tapanko, all the venues that I visited or passed by were nearly empty. There seems to be a huge punting infrastructure for a market that doesn't exist. If the prices were lower, this would be an absolutely awesome punting destination. Instead, its just ok. But if you were thinking of heading there anyway for a nice beach or golf vacation, it's a good choice. Just make sure that you always pay in cash, and definitely always PAY AS YOU GO. Do not run a tab.

So just some other tips for would be first time visitors to PV:

Where to stay If your goal is for the beach and local flavor, then stay in Zona Romantica. The food is better, and the beaches nicer. Its also walkable and atmospheric. But its far from the "nightlife. " If you are there for golf, or enjoy a more stereotypical North American large scale beach resort, then stay in the northern hotel district, where the "nightlife" is. But otherwise, you will be on a soulless highway, cabbing it everywhere.

Massages Coni Massage gets mentioned a lot. They do "happy endings" if you request it, but it isn't creepily pushed. The masseuses are not as skilled as those professionally trained, but they try in earnest, and its hard to complain for $20/ HR. The facilities aren't great, but good enough. Quiet, cool, and acceptably clean. I went twice.

Food Ahh. If you are out to dine with friends and family, then there are great restaurants. But with a bunch of guys or by yourself, you want tacos. They are cheap, and the best part of Mexico. In ZR you can wander around, daytime or nighttime, and continually stumble onto a little taco stand with a bunch of locals waiting in line. Just go for it. I ate nothing but delicious tacos, and did not get sick. In fact, I never have. And I had to really stuff myself to spend anything close to $10. The best taco joint by far is Pancho's Tacos, near the southern end of ZR. When you walk by it, it may seem like a tourist, gringo oriented place. But its not. Locals love it too. There just aren't as many locals there because the line is so freaking long. But their tacos are better than the others by a mile. Even the other local favorite, El Carboncito, was inferior by a notable margin. The quality of the meat is just head and shoulders above the other places, where its diced into pieces so small that you can't judge their quality. And it costs the same as the divier joints. I tried a lot of places, but in hindsight, wish that I just went to Panchos every time, especially if you want pastor or some type of beef. If you want cheap seafood tacos, the best place is Marisma, on the eastern end of ZR. Great great camaron tostada.

Pharmaceuticals Go to Farmacia Guadalajara, in ZR on Insurgentes st. It's a big modern, chain looking pharmacy. But I price comparison shopped, and their prices are cheaper than all those grungier storefronts around town trying to rip off tourists, and I would trust their products much more.

Money ATMs are everywhere. But if you prefer to exchange currency like I do, your options are surprisingly limited. The banks give the best exchange rates, but not all the banks exchange money. I waited in line for a long time at HSBC, only to find that they don't exchange money. The best bet is Banca Azteca near the Ciule river. They are open Mon-Sat, until something like 9 pm. There aren't as many casa de cambios as in other parts of Mexico, and they posted crappy rates.

For all you guys on your way to PV, enjoy!

[QUOTE=Manny51;2033175]There are three clubs that are literally right next to each other Tapankos, Vizzio, and Sahara. Seriously, the entrances face each other, and are about 30 yards apart. You could think of them as one complex.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=JohnDough;2027997]I have attached a map of the main attractions.[/QUOTE]I updated the map. Apparently I got the location of the new Sahara club wrong. The facebook page for Sahara is a recycled copy of the Enigma page, which was previously Bandidas and Chicas and El y Ella before that. I assume the owners of Enigma sold or closed the club that was located beside Mamitas and then opened the Sahara club in a different location. I don't know if Enigma has reopened under another name. If Sahara is in la zona roja, it must have taken the spot where El Patron (previously Alazanas) used to be.

[QUOTE=Manny51;2033175]
I visited King George's Sports Bar. Usually 3-5 ladies, but those there were definitely attractive, all 7-9.
Tapankos, Vizzio, and Sahara. The dancers here definitely had the heavier, bigger assed, Hispanic look, which quite frankly, is not to my liking.
Except for Tapanko, all the venues that I visited or passed by were nearly empty.
[/QUOTE]The last time I was in Puerto Vallarta, the Andromeda strip club had better looking women than King George and a busier vibe. It is only slightly more expensive than Tapanko. I don't know why this club doesn't get more coverage. It is small and on a side street, but it was my favorite club. Most of the clients were locals, which is a good sign. Early in the evening there weren't many clients, but after 11 pm on a weekend it was always crowded, at least during peak season. It is a good compromise between the high end tourist clubs and the low end clubs.

[QUOTE=Manny51;2033175] I didn't even check out the higher end places, where all the so called "best talent" hangs out. The talent is certainly there, but its pricier, and the logistics can be a little complicated. That plus ripoff stories abound. In fact, I am curious as to why the prices stay so high. Except for Tapanko, all the venues that I visited or passed by were nearly empty. There seems to be a huge punting infrastructure for a market that doesn't exist. If the prices were lower, this would be an absolutely awesome punting destination.
[/QUOTE]Keep in mind that Puerto Vallarta is a tourist town with a high and low season. They gear up for the high season and then have excess capacity during the low season. They also get very busy during national holidays and on weekends at the clubs for locals. The prices are high because they have to make enough during the high season to cover them during the low season. The ripoffs at the high priced clubs are an extension of this make-it-while-you-can mentality, combined with an endless supply of new tourists.

If price is really a concern, there are lower cost venues like Las Antorchas, Golden Boy and Los Corrales. Another place the locals go is La Botana and the streetwalker area. Usually the women there are fat and unattractive, but every now and then there is a good one for the same price. If you have more time than money, those are worth checking out.

[QUOTE=JohnDough;2033944]The last time I was in Puerto Vallarta, the Andromeda strip club had better looking women than King George and a busier vibe. It is only slightly more expensive than Tapanko. I don't know why this club doesn't get more coverage. It is small and on a side street, but it was my favorite club. Most of the clients were locals, which is a good sign. Early in the evening there weren't many clients, but after 11 pm on a weekend it was always crowded, at least during peak season. It is a good compromise between the high end tourist clubs and the low end clubs.

Keep in mind that Puerto Vallarta is a tourist town with a high and low season. They gear up for the high season and then have excess capacity during the low season. They also get very busy during national holidays and on weekends at the clubs for locals. The prices are high because they have to make enough during the high season to cover them during the low season. The ripoffs at the high priced clubs are an extension of this make-it-while-you-can mentality, combined with an endless supply of new tourists.

If price is really a concern, there are lower cost venues like Las Antorchas, Golden Boy and Los Corrales. Another place the locals go is La Botana and the streetwalker area. Usually the women there are fat and unattractive, but every now and then there is a good one for the same price. If you have more time than money, those are worth checking out.[/QUOTE]I wish I had visited Andromeda. Well, maybe next time!