Pattaya Reports

Just to preview what lies within this tome, I describe my rather fruitless experience at Insomnia on Saturday night. There is a hustle scheme afoot at Insomnia, described within, and I also mention an encounter with a very beautiful, very expensive FL from Surin. And of course, my experience with the fat ugly lady that spoiled the whole thing. At the end, I do get laid, but with a Beach Rd FL.

The quick walk from Lima Lima to Insomnia was marked by two near-hit lady boy encounters and two glow-stick kids trying to trap my wrist. I slapped all four of them away with my slender hand. Upon entry at Insomnia, the goons frisked me. I don't get this. I had a wallet in one pocket, along with a cell phone, and in the other pocket, I had another cell phone plus a wad of cash, a pen, a pill box (pain killers, Levitra, caffeine pills), and a bunch of other stuff. They pressed these things gruffly, and let me through. There could have been anything in my pockets, including a 12 inch black dildo, or more pertinently, a weapon of some sort. Perhaps the intent is not to actually detect my 12 inch dildo or my Swiss Army pen knife, but rather it gives them the opportunity to see if I get flustered by the idea of a frisk. So maybe there is some logic in there.

At the top of the steps, the crush of humanity began immediately. I mean, it was Saturday night, and Insomnia was in full swing. The room was as full as a room can get, I considered what would happen if there was an emergency, and I tell you what, there would be death and crushed people for sure. There is no way that number of people can get out of that room in a reasonable amount of time. Thank you Fire Marshall Kumbu, on with the description, shall we?

At the door there was a wall of people, and so I pushed my way through thinking there was space a bit further inside. But how wrong I was. This felt not so much like a can of sardines, but more like a can of human spam. Indistinguishable human meat crammed into a tight area without regard to the origin of that meat. I kept pushing and pushing my way through the spam, and before long I was in the middle of the club. There was no place to stand where you were not in someone's face. It was incredible. And everyone, I mean [B]everyone[/B] was eyeing everyone else. It was amazing: every girl that I passed eyed me, and I reciprocated, and it was not just me. The same was happening for every guy in there. The hook up disco of all time: Insomnia Pattaya.

I decided to make my way around the club. As I walked, I was batting about 500 in terms of eye gaze + smile. That is, roughly half the girls were locking eye gaze with me and then either holding it a moment or mildly smiling. But the smiling was rare. The girls here play a little smoother than in Lima Lima. Here, there is the veneer of every day respectability, but really, everyone knows why we are here. We're not in this dance club to dance, phphph, fuck no: there is no space to wriggle your elbow, let alone rip out a nae nae.

I then made my way down the right side of the club, walking the gauntlet of ladies and other irrelevantly gendered humans. It was very hard to see and assess during this time, so my goal was not to see, but to [B]be seen[/B]. Everyone did see me, of that you can be sure. Boy, these girls take their work seriously. They look like they are having fun, but this is work boiiii. While they are mixing their whiskey and coke on their table, you can see their eyes darting around, looking for any potential mates for the night. It is intense.

Got to the back, crossed over to the other side, and walked my way back up to the front of the club. There was absolutely NO WHERE to stand. I was looking for a spot to park my sorry ass, but there really was nothing. It was uncomfortable, to be honest. It's like dancing with a super hot chick, you feel awkward, and don't know how to move, where to put your legs, and oh god, what do I do with my goddam hands?!

I found myself at the front, just in front of the toilets, standing in a spot of space that had somehow emerged. Phew. There was this giant of an Asian man on my left, and then a small corridor of space for people to in and out of the toilets, and then there were three tables against the wall, occupied by ladies of varying hotness. In front of me was a table, occupied by some medium-warmth girls and some dudes, and behind me were perhaps 10 people standing around who I was not watching (mistake).

I stood for a good 20 minutes, observing, sipping beer, trying my best not to look bored, or awkward, or anxious. You want to look cool, but not too cool. You want to look happy, but not frighteningly gleeful. You want to look relaxed, but not high. And you have to hold your posture, or else you will look like a slouchy sloth. And it's hard to coordinate all of this, after 4 hours of beer-drinking, gogo-girl-fending, and walking street sweat-exchanging.

Seeing nothing, I decided to make another round of the club, and it took me a good 30 minutes to get all the way around. I did stop in the back to observe from that angle, but quickly moved on. It's the smokiest part of the club. And when I got to the front again, I regained my spot. But this time, I did notice who was in the space behind me. There were two girls, one wearing a blue one-piece dress, with long sexy hair. She looked mid-thirties, but in good shape, and somewhat attractive. Not quite my stunner preference at this moment in time, but a good back up. Her friend was, well, less fortunate in the looks department. It was very sad, but she was perhaps the least attractive person in the club. She too was mid-thirties, very overweight, and unfortunately, her face was the absolutely least attractive you could imagine. She had eyes like a pig (not being mean, but it looked like pig eyes), and her lips were fat, thick, and bulging. Her cheek bones popped out at the wrong place, somehow, and her jaw was slightly protruding. So very hard to look at. As I noticed them, they both gave me a smile. Oy, let it not be, please.

Next to them was a wiry white dude who looked odd, like there was something wrong with this kid. He was in his mid-thirties and seemed playful for no reason. He was dancing, but in a supremely girly way, with his hands twisting and his body twirling. It looked like something out of Mystique Dances in the Rainforest with Unicorns, or something. Anyway, I took up my spot in front of them, and next to the giant of the Asian man who was still there. The Asian guy was something of a curiosity. He was huge, maybe 6'2", shoulders the size of a Mini Cooper, and a seemingly gentle disposition about him.

In front of me, to my left, I noticed a super sexy girl. She was wearing tight, short, tight, shorts. And these shorts were both tight and short, in case you missed that. Moreover, her top was matching in all the relevant parameters, namely tightness and shortness. She was standing right in the walkway to the toilets and dancing very obviously. She had a great smile on her face, and was basically just inviting bids for her services. She was very gregarious, very energetic, and very, very well put-together. She was a 9 in my book, perhaps more.

A middle aged Russian looking dude, large, gruff, though clearly sophisticated, approaches her and eyes her voluptuous ass, and then gives her a big old smile. She reciprocates, and they start to talk. Aaaah, well, the beauty of the club, snapped up before I had a chance to really scope her out.

I stood for another 20 minutes, and then made my trip round the back. This time, as I was walking, I bumped into a girl in a bunny-like outfit, and she started chatting me up. I was a little surprised by how forward she was. She put her hands on me, was pushing all the right buttons, and then asked for a drink. What? Is this an LD, or was she scoping me out, to see how generous I was. I agreed, and then her friend arrived, and this girl asks for drink for her friend. I agreed, just to see where this was going. As soon as I agreed, one of the work staff at Insomnia ushered me and the two girls into the middle of the club, cleared out some space on a table and placed us with a group of other people at a table. Am I getting table service? What for?

Then I noticed that both these girls were wearing the same outfit. Hmm, this is not looking good. So I asked one of them why they are both wearing the same thing, and she says 'we work here'.

Ah.

I had just got played, by the same fucking hustle that the gogo bars are playing at these days. There's something about the tag team dynamic which causes confusion in the male brain, and I was not able to pick up on it fast enough. It all happened so fast. Dumb, dumb, dumb. So these girls were grifters, not WGs, and my guess is that they could be bar fined, but why would you pay a bar fine if you could get someone else for just the cost of their services? Anyway, a few moments passed and they both asked for more drinks, and I said in a flat tone, "No. That's it. " And I looked away from them. I could not even bare to look at them, they disgusted me. And they knew it. They slinked away a few moments later, leaving me at the table, with a decent place to stand now.

I stood there for a good 30 minutes, but it was the middle of the club and I could not see people very well. So I eventually moved back to my spot at the front, and just as I got to the front, a table against the wall opened up, and I zipped over, found a stool and sat down. I noticed that I was now sitting almost shoulder-to-shoulder with that sexy girl's friend. The sexy girl who hooked up with the gnarly Russian dude. Only she had not! She was back dancing, alone, a mere 3 feet from me.

But her friend, who I had not even noticed before because of said bunny's bobbling ass, was one mighty fine specimen. She was wearing a red halter top (I have written of my fondness for the red halter top before), and had a very cute face. She was sitting on a stool, like me, with her back against the wall. Her friend was dancing right in front of her, which is why I had not seen her before. But she was sitting quietly at the table sipping her drink, occasionally looking at her phone, making no noise or drama. I said nothing to any of them, just played it cool for a while.

Because I was alone at this table that was in a prime location, people wanted to share the table, which is cool. The first ones to join, unfortunately, were the mid-thirties girls from before, the decent back-up and her very ugly friend. But the decent back-up was looking less and less decent the closer she got to me. Her nose was off, not fake, but just weird, and I could not get past that. Besides, she was clearly not interested in me because a dark-skinned muscle man appeared, and they were suddenly an item. Cool.

But unfortunately for me, ugly girl took a serious liking to me. She offered her glass for me to clink drinks with her, which I did (you have to, you can't refuse). And that was the opening. After that, she started getting more and more chummy with me. She was getting closer, and was giggling and laughing, and just trying everything to start some kind of flame. But how could she? She was hideous!

Meanwhile, I was trying to work on this beauty on my left. Every time I looked at her, she was getting more and more pretty, so I decided to strike up a conversation.

I lean over and ask her why her friend is so happy and dancy, but she's quiet and sitting down. She says something about how it is so cold in Insomnia, and that her friend is shielding her from the AC vent. I thought of offering to warm her up, but that would have been too soon. I let it stand at that. I was sitting right next to her, so no need to press the conversation too fast.

While I had been in conversation with this beauty, her friend was in conversation with an elderly European guy. The man was obviously sophisticated, and he was obviously into the very best of asses, which is why he was chatting up this girl. But a few minutes later, he took his leave of her.

Then those fuck-wads with jello shots arrive, and the fat ugly girl at my table says 'yes, yes, yes', and she points to me, herself, and her friend, indicating that now that we had shared a table for a full 7 minutes, it was time for us to bond with shared jello shots. I said, 'no, not for me', and she pushed me aside and indicated that I do not know what I am talking about. She ordered 6 from the guy. I grabbed her by the arm forcefully, and said 'NO. I am not having those, I don't want jello in my body. No. ' She brushed me off again, and 6 jello shots arrive. And somehow the check comes to me. How did that happen?

Turns out this is all a game. If a lady buys the drink, they pay full price. If a lady orders that same drink and a man pays for it, the lady gets a LD ticket, redeemable for cash upon exit. You don't have to be an employee of Insomnia, any lady can do this. It is a scheme to get falang to part with their cash. So the shots were 35 baht a piece, and I was being billed for 6 of them. I paid, but I told her that I am not drinking / eating them. She objected, and I over-ruled her objection. She appealed, and I dismissed the appeal.

So she got her friend to try the first, and she nearly gagged. So the ugly girl was left to finish all six of them. Which she did, but she did so with great eyeballing at me. As if somehow this was MY fault. But this was all her doing, in an attempt to cozy up to me, and I fucking was fucking not fucking having fucking any fucking thing to fucking do with it. And no fucking, that's for sure.

This was all observed by the stunning girl sitting to my left, which actually made me feel good. I'm glad she got to see the kind of shit we have to put up with.

Meanwhile, an Indian dude spies the pretty girl's gorgeous dancing friend to my left. He stops in his tracks, and gives her the 'oh come ON, you've got to be kidding me!' look. He sidles up to her and starts talking to her really well. This paji had game, I have to give it to him. He was not much to look at. His face was fine, but he had a pot belly, loads of hair sticking out of the top of his shirt, but he had a nice smile, and he was one smooth muther fucker. You could just sense the inner confidence in this man, confidence bourn from a childhood of unconditional love. He had self-worth, and was willing to approach this most unattainable of beauties to try to convince her to come back to his hovel with her. She was supremely polite (I could hear their tone, not their voices), and there was some nice back and forth banter. But after just 5 minutes or so, Indian dude bids her farewell and departs.

So I asked the pretty friend, who I was getting more and more into, why her friend keeps batting all these guys away. Is she not interested in men tonight. Her response was utterly illuminating:

"Her price too high".

Hah! You did NOT just say that, darling! Her price?! That tells you everything you need to know about why beautiful girls are in insomnia. She continued:

"Men, they like my friend, but they cannot pay her price, and she not come down on price. " I asked what the offending price was, and she said "6000 baht". I said "yes, that is a very high price. What's your, erm, price?" 4000 baht came the response. I nodded, and smiled at her.

So there is about as much chance that I am paying 4000 baht for an Insomnia FL as I am going to vote for Donald Trump, but I have to say, this girl was more sparkling than any of the gogo girls I saw that night. She was well-spoken, she was cute, and she was physically stunning. 4000, when compared to what some gogo girls are fetching (including LDs and BFs) could be considered a steal for this gem. But not for me.

Before I made a counter offer (I would be willing to go with her for 3000, though I was going to offer 2000 and work my way up as little as I could), I decided to build a little rapport. I asked her where she was from (Surin), why she spoke such excellent English (and she did, it was not bar girl English, but it had fluency and grammar), and she said she learned since she was a child, and she also went to university. Huh. We talked a little more, and I was digging this girl. As in, dig if you will a picture, of she and me engaged in a kiss.

I was interrupted by the ugly girl's friend, who slapped my knee, and said to me, "You go with my friend?

This took me by surprise, since one moment I was heavily engaged in enticing the pretty little fruit on my left, and now suddenly I am being asked to take the pork belly home with me. Unfortunately, and I really do regret this, I did not have the wits to mask my horror at the idea. I said "no", but I did so with the face and intonation of "are you fucking kidding me?" So like Nooo! And unfortunately, fat girl saw this response, and I saw her face just sink like a sack of rocks in the Hudson river. My response had just validated every insecurity about herself that she has, and it was cruel of me. It was downright cruel, and I should have been better. I should have been just a tad more human to this girl, who after all, was playing the game just like all the rest of us.

Imagine if you proposition a girl, and she gives you that same response: Nooo! You would feel like shit. Granted, in that scenario you would be paying, and in this scenario I guess I would be paying, but still, emotional rejection is hard to take. So she storms off into the toilet. Argh.

I sat there for 5 minutes feeling dejected, while dancing girl hooked another fish who was too small, and she released him back into the pond. My preferred girl was sitting quietly, watching people as they walked by. And then fat girl emerges, and it looks like she has been crying. Oh jeez, really?! She has a bunch of toilet paper with which she is wiping tears away from her eyes.

So my mood is shot, it is 4 am now, and I am exhausted. Even if I close the deal with this beauty to my left, I don't know if I can make it count. But fat girl starts to maraud around me now, with this angry expression on her face. And she's looking at the two pretty girls to me left, as if they are the ones causing all this misery for her. She's looking downright belligerent, with her brow furrowed, her lower jaw protruding, and her fists clenched. Uh-oh. I decide it is time to bail.

So I lean in to the pretty thing, and I tell her that fat girl just got rejected, and she is angry, and I am concerned that she might get violent. And pretty girl says to me: "I completely understand, that is a very reasonable concern for you to have. " When was the last time you heard a Thai girl of any kind speak like that? I say I must leave, and she says "too bad". Yes. I considered asking for her number, but that would just be too much trouble. I did not want to tie myself down at this point, I only have one more night to go. She's pretty as one can imagine, and given her lexicon and control over English grammar and prosody, I am sure I would have lots to talk to her about. But 4000 is a lot. Even if I can negotiate her down to 3000, I wonder. However, note that in retrospect, I think I should have tried to negotiate her down, since the very next night I spent that amount on a gogo girl, and it went, well, ok. But I think the lateness of the night was the real deciding factor. I was ready for bed, believe it or not.

So I bailed. I walked out, and made a point of letting fat girl see me leave.

So I got out onto walking street, and by now it is no longer walking street. Cars are now allowed on the street at this hour, and it has transformed into a market of sorts. I start walking back to my hotel, very, very dejected. I was followed the whole way by ladyboys saying 'I want to go widjooooo'. Sweet, thanks, but no thanks. I was feeling pretty dejected: I came to Pattaya and I'm not getting laid?! How did I manage to fuck this up so badly?

As I was walking up beach road, I came across a FL who was very do-able. Hang on, there's hope yet. But she was not all that stunning, just doable. So I walked a little more to see what was there, and I found a slightly sexier one. This one had a pretty face, looked to be mid-twenties, and had nice legs on her. My, there is potential on Beach Road even approaching 4:30 am. I kept walking and I came across a third sexy girl, about as sexy as the previous one, and I thought I had better not push my luck. So I smiled at her.

She said "where you go?" I said hotel, and she said "I can come with you". So I asked her how much, and she said 1500ST. Hah! I said no, thanks, I am on my way back to sleep, so no need to spend 1500. She said ok, 1200 baht. I said no, no need, I am happy to sleep. I said I can give you 500 baht for ST, since I want to sleep soon. But you have to do some smoking, and then sex with condom, many positions. She had trouble with the last part (understanding), but we agreed in principle. So the 500 baht deal was agreed upon in principle because it was 4:30 am, and I was so confident in my assertion that I was on my way back to sleep. Which I was. So she had no negotiating power at all, since I had nothing to lose.

So we walked the 2 minutes to the hotel making small talk (Isaan, one child, etc. , etc.), she showered first, followed by me. When I got out, she was under the sheets, naked already. I got into the sheets, and she went straight to the BBBJ. It was not great at all, but whatever. She had some smoking legs, so I maneuvered such that I could massage her legs while she sucked, and then I grabbed her ass, which was a little flabby and leathery. In fact, when I got that close to her legs and ass, I could see the numerous imperfections in her skin. There were the obligatory kne and calf burns from motorcycles, there were what looked like cigarette burns on her thighs, and there was some minor stretch marks on her calves. None of this is visible until you get within 6 inches of her legs. But what do you want for 500 baht?

I put on the condom and worked the rather feckless little Kumbu into her pussy. We did missionary, on her side, flat on her belly, and then we ended in doggie (of course). It was fine, nothing spectacular, perfunctory is the word. And next week I will not remember what her face looked like. But her body served as a vessel to stimulate my genitals and a vessel into which I could ejaculate. That's all I needed, after the night I endured. I gave her 800 baht.

So in sum, this was somewhat of a strikeout night for me. True, I did get some very cheap, acceptable sex at the very end of the night, but the pursuit of perfection was thwarted first by the gogo hustle, and then by the can of spam that was Insomnia, and then by the ugly girl who took a liking to the gentleness of Kumbu. But before you naysayers revel in my failure, let me say that the next night was the exact polar opposite to what happened today. So stay tuned for a happier field report soon.

[QUOTE=Kumbu;1894267] Anyway, after having spent two full, active days in Pattaya (detailed in the next few posts), I can say that Pattaya has indeed changed significantly, and not for the better, IMHO. But that's not to say that it is not a terrific place to monger. I love this city, because right now, it represents something that no other city in the world (as far as I know) does. And that is that men have needs which are not to be shamed or denigrated or suppressed. These needs are natural, they are part of our biology, and to deny them is as bad as denying the biology of homosexuality, or other now-accepted notions. We used to think homosexuality was promiscuous, weak-willed, men of low moral character engaging in Sodom-and-Gomorra debauchery, when they should be raising repressed young children in the suburbs instead. Likewise, the broader culture, mostly lead by conservative and religious control structures, label what we do in much the same way. These conservative control structures have forged an unholy alliance with feminist reactive forces, which have pushed the demonization of male sexual needs beyond the pale. That is not to say that all male sexual desire is to be celebrated or even tolerated. There are things that should, on moral grounds, be prohibited, such as child exploitation, pedophilia, sexual abuse, etc. These typically involve the absence or inability to give consent by one party in the sexual encounter. But what we do is a different kettle of fish. What happens between two consenting adults should be no one's business, nor anything subject to moral indignation. What we do is no more a moral turpitude than what Macy's does every day: conduct a commercial transaction. I know, I'm preaching to the choir.

Pattaya is the one city where, as an institution, the city has accepted the fact that men like, nay, [B]need[/B] to have frequent, uncomplicated and varied sex with women within the age range of 18-40. That, I believe, is a biological directive, certified by the birthing age of human females. And as an institution, the city has structured everything around the meeting of those needs. The economic backbone of the city is mongering, the inhabitants are all either mongers, providers, or regular people who owe 100% of their livelihood to this principle. And as such, the city has proven a basic economic truth: if there is a human need, and you provide a service to meet that need, you will make money.[/QUOTE]Sadly this is changing quite rapidly. Pattaya was indeed a monger's town when I first visited in the late 90's. There were very few "other" tourists. Low season was amazing with very few dudes in town and GoGos, beer bars, and Soi 6 packed to the gills with gals. Beach Rd was only two lanes and traffic was non-existent. At the moment I would say that "regular" tourists outnumber mongers at any time during the year which is quite a change. Chinese package tourists abound. I wouldn't get near Koh Larn if you paid me. My sense is that this trend will continue. Non-mongers will become a higher percentage of Pattaya tourists. Walking St will become more and more like Bourbon St in NO with the true fun and filth gone and a more Disneyland type feel to it. The saving grace for me are places like Kinnarree. Love the G-Clubs. Perfect pricing structure as well.

[QUOTE=Kumbu;1894277]
So I sit down mid-show, and within 30 seconds I had a very toothy girl seeking permission to sit down. Ach, sit down, that's the first step towards LD, and then LD for some other leachy hanger-on, and then more LDs, it never ends. But again, I thought it might be fun to chat with her during the show, so I agreed. And within 30 seconds, her best friend arrives and says 'you buy for me lady dink naa, I take care you.
[/QUOTE]Love your reports, dude! We seem similar. We kind of take things as they go and sometimes find out too late that we messed things up. Certainly, not getting laid in Pattaya is quite depressing! Haha But your description of buying LDs is spot on. Sometimes it can be fun to have a couple of girls getting your full attention, but in looking back it is pretty rare to actually end up taking one of them home. I have enough trouble dealing with one girl, let alone two or three.

Hope the rest of your trip goes well. I am dying to get back there, which is strange as I left there only about 5 weeks ago and I was so ready to leave. Sigh.

I feel kinda bad that you did not score at Insomnia. I just wish I was there with you. I was there practically every night for about 2. 5 weeks, alone, with guys from ISG and a couple of times with a girl I found there.

So, a couple of thoughts for you, BECAUSE it takes about 3 nights and at least about 12-15 hours to figure out the girls at Insomnia (it might not have seemed so to others, but I am very patient, and I love to study, study, study ). :

1. I think you arrived at about 2 am. And that's good. I think you said you were beat by 4 am, I presume it's because you hit some other spots before Lima, Lima (which I never entered). That was unfortunate, IMO.

So, next time you may want to do what I did. I take a nap from about 9-1130 pm or midnight (after afternoon massage and hanging around at Central Festival or other places nearby my condo. And then I get to Insomnia (aptly named for me) by about 1 am.

When I arrive there, 95 PC of days I had never had a single drink before I entered Ibar / Insomnia. I had massages and massage girls in my condo apt but never drank and never kept any booze in my fridge. So, I was freshly shaved and showered too right before entering at about 1 am ( and a little bit to eat as well to coat the stomach ) all those nights.

I then just drink, dance (yeah you can dance, even though it's wall to wall people) if you are on opposite side near the DJ area or right below, or right directly in front of the small stages ogling the girls up there who are dancing. Usually the ones there try to get me to pick them! Try standing there, it works ! But move around ! Don't keep buying drinks for the girls then they claim you so, it's best to be seen as a high energy ( loner ? ) for hours....Also,move around, move around, and never stay in any one area for more than 15-20 minutes, as then you in that spot become stale. Move and show energy and be happy and show it. But you can return to that spot 45-60 minutes later and that return may sometimes get more looks from some decent young girls .....Don't get stuck at a table at Insomnia...I think that's the kiss of death there as then you become sedentary ....and it sends a ' boring ' message to the girls, visually and in terms of energy.

But, I do dance a lot (I'm not particularly good, but I do project a lot of energy and look like I am happy and having a ball). I walk around a lot, maybe 6-10 times before 4 am. And, there are some good, hot girls who only arrive by about 3 am. And then, after about 4/5 am, when all the other dance clubs close another fresh crop comes in (both guys and girls). Remember Insomnia closes at 7 am and even at 630 am there are probably 75-100 people still in there. These latecomer girls are definitely worth keeping tabs on, because IMO, you can find some diamonds in the rough and great GFE's. These latecomer girls want a date ans need the money. In general, at Insomnia, I would say the better a girl is dressed, the less interested I am (there are exceptions) because I am looking for diamonds in the rough. And, newbies (say 1-4 months in Pattaya). As Mr ENT says, avoid the girls in groups of 3 or more and avoid the ones who are clearly there just to party or are doing a live feed on their phones for their overseas boyfriends. Avoid ones with expensive iPhones too.

2. IF you don't mind BR type of girls, as a last resort, you will usually find those less confident and not so hot looking girls, dressed below average, right below the DJ area at Insomnia. I would pay them only 1000 LT though because they are at best 5's. I had zero interest in them. Although quite a few over there on many nights would grab me, talk to me, try to dance with me and say they wanted to go with me etc. There were 2 girls at Insomnia (one from below the DJ area) and one that always hangs out near the front entrance tables who were 6/7 that on second thought after I left Pattaya, I said to myself I should have tried. And, that's because they really seemed to have a interest in me and I am sure both would have agreed to 1000 LT. Or else, I reject them (but please remember that I'm one who likes to set very low expectations and then if they are really good GFE, never ask or talk about money, and want to just stay with me. Then I often pay them twice what they expected. Only because, if I really like a girl, I want to express that clearly and also want to see them happy because that makes me happy. And, I am always looking for girls who could be GFE and stay with me a minimum of 2-3 days and nights as GFE companions (meaning I have to like the face and the personality and they are under 28 ) . The rest then usually follows.

3. IMO, the best time to strike a deal there is between 4-5 am. Maybe even 530 am, for LT. Of course, by now many girls would have been taken. But, usually patience has rewarded me, between the 430-545 am time period. A few times I just asked a girl at 545 or 6 and had no problem. But I always spoke my price first and did not allow the girl to quote first. I think it's easier to cut a deal if you start first at Insonmia and the highest I started with was 1,500 LT. I was able to get girls (none bad thankfully, except the one who never entered my condo apt because she was pretending to throw up and said she would in my apt). The most I agreed to was 2,500 LT and that was for an 8. And that girl who was an 8 IMO, told me, for younger , hotter guys she may go for 1500 LT.

I had 3 girls who stayed with me for multiple days. So, it can work. And, I'm not young like Mr ENT or Uncle V. So, I think you will do better, if you embrace the place in your mind and show a lot of energy and live in there happily for hours and hours, night after night. Getting better at the scoping and targeting as the nights add up. At least, that was my experience. YMMV. I liked it so much that I will be back in Jan / Feb for 5 weeks, and will do just massages and Insomnia practically every night (although my nasal allergies and smoke from in there resulted in sinusitis for me and I had to get on my sinusitis antibiotics.) Price for me for being in that Insomnia war zone. But, I don't like Go Go girls or the the saopie girls or the girls in the Soi's. I might go back to Kinnaree ( if it's still open ) though only cause it's an early Pm thing. I suggest you try it ( near Jomtien ) and get there by 1 pm.

4. Also, another important thing about Insomnia is you will find that your game and your confidence and your results get better with experience (as with most things) and so after day 3, you will recognize the regulars (who I avoid). Also, try to be nice, tip well the bartenders behind the bar, and try to get to become acquainted with some of the roving bartenders guys. These guys can be helpful in avoiding bad girls and asking them if a girl is a regular there.

5. I never bought any drinks for any girl in about 12-15 nights ( except with one of guys ) BEFORE I decided that I definitely wanted to try her LT. Yeah, I spent about 20 k baht there on just my drinks. But got a 20 % discount on all drinks ( except the shots from the mobile/ roving servers) with the 500 baht VIP card, and 10 % in rewards money on the card to use at the NY Diner below. This came in useful as I ended up with nearly 2,000 baht to use there and the girls like to eat there before they leave.

[QUOTE=Kumbu;1894582]Just to preview what lies within this tome, I describe my rather fruitless experience at Insomnia on Saturday night. There is a hustle scheme afoot at Insomnia, described within, and I also mention an encounter with a very beautiful, very expensive FL from Surin. And of course, my experience with the fat ugly lady that spoiled the whole thing. At the end, I do get laid, but with a Beach Rd FL.

I put on the condom and worked the rather feckless little Kumbu into her pussy. We did missionary, on her side, flat on her belly, and then we ended in doggie (of course). It was fine, nothing spectacular, perfunctory is the word. And next week I will not remember what her face looked like. But her body served as a vessel to stimulate my genitals and a vessel into which I could ejaculate. That's all I needed, after the night I endured. I gave her 800 baht.

So in sum, this was somewhat of a strikeout night for me. True, I did get some very cheap, acceptable sex at the very end of the night, but the pursuit of perfection was thwarted first by the gogo hustle, and then by the can of spam that was Insomnia, and then by the ugly girl who took a liking to the gentleness of Kumbu. But before you naysayers revel in my failure, let me say that the next night was the exact polar opposite to what happened today. So stay tuned for a happier field report soon.[/QUOTE]First BKK and now Patts you have an absolute edge in your writing my dear friend and its an absolute adventure reading your posts. Its like I am in your place as each and every sequence is so detailed and yet so erotic its just amazing.

Super best FRs I should say and there should be a new page dedicated to your FRs so everyone can read and enjoy the time.

Cheers man: Keep the good work and never stop writing.

As for the floors scene you should party with us and never any lady will quote you any price.

Alex.

Insomnia can be a daunting experience. The can of spam analogy is spot on. I know exactly how you felt that night.

And I think you really had some bad luck with getting hooked by the fat girl. Otherwise you may have been able to work the hottie and get her to lower her price as the night wore on. I would have given piggy the coldest of shoulders right away and maybe have even bailed from the table. I find those situations excruciatingly uncomfortable.

Also when the start to order drinks / jello shots on your tab always appeal to your server to say no. I have found that they are pretty good about that and have almost always looked to get my approval before serving the stuff the girls order.

The costume dancers girl scam is a new and unfortunate development at Ibar. It can be quite disorienting. I got roped in once for an LD. But at least I was able to make put with and engage in some heavy petting with the girl a bit before her friend came over to ask for a drink and I realized what was going on. So all in all it wasn't a bad experience, but one I will avoid in the future.

Haven offers some great advice on how to work Ibar. He really got the hang of it during his trip. I endorse everything he says. The dude has a great energy about him and it really puts people at ease.

I'd also add that if you don't want to play the long game you can be in and out of there pretty quickly. Just quickly make the rounds, pick your target, lay down a little charm, and you are usually good to go. On many nights I have hit Ibar at 1 AM and been out of there with a hot girl for LT by 3 AM at the latest. But this takes a little discipline and decisiveness.

I am not great with dealing with crowds and get a little claustrophobic packed in the spam can. The jostling and shoving form the douchey guys really gets on my nerves. But when its less crowded (say on a Thursday nights) I am very happy playing the long game and letting things come to me.

[QUOTE=UncleVolodya;1894676]

The costume dancers girl scam is a new and unfortunate development at Ibar. It can be quite disorienting. I got roped in once for an LD. But at least I was able to make put with and engage in some heavy petting with the girl a bit before her friend came over to ask for a drink and I realized what was going on.[/QUOTE]FWIW, I don't think it's a scam. The girls in the outfits who dance there are Insomnia staff, just like the bartenders. I think they get paid very, very little and they cannot just leave with a guy. There is no BF. And, they are not coyote girls. But, I believe management allows them to make some money off the drinks you buy for them at same price that you pay. They will even sit at a table with you if you buy a bottle. And after 3 am or later (I've seen one of those hired dancers leave at 7 am once) some may do only ST (they can't do LT because they have to go home and sleep and get ready for work again 6 nights a week until 3 am or even 5 am. I believe they do ask for 4 K ST because they think they are hot shit. If you cut a deal you have to wait until management lets them leave. There is no BF. I would smile and be real nice to them but don't buy them a drink. Ever. I never did. I studied them and asked some of the staff there (to get corraborating but independent input) and figured out that it was not for me. I like pure FL's and those that are not regulars. So they did not fit my target.

[QUOTE=Haven123;1894680]FWIW, I don't think it's a scam. The girls in the outfits who dance there are Insomnia staff, just like the bartenders. I think they get paid very, very little and they cannot just leave with a guy. There is no BF. And, they are not coyote girls. But, I believe management allows them to make some money off the drinks you buy for them at same price that you pay. They will even sit at a table with you if you buy a bottle. And after 3 am or later (I've seen one of those hired dancers leave at 7 am once) some may do only ST (they can't do LT because they have to go home and sleep and get ready for work again 6 nights a week until 3 am or even 5 am. I believe they do ask for 4 K ST because they think they are hot shit. If you cut a deal you have to wait until management lets them leave. There is no BF. I would smile and be real nice to them but don't buy them a drink. Ever. I never did. I studied them and asked some of the staff there (to get corraborating but independent input) and figured out that it was not for me. I like pure FL's and those that are not regulars. So they did not fit my target.[/QUOTE]I did not mean scam in the literal sense. I am sure its legitimate and organized by the club. And I agree the girls need to make a living. But its still a waste of money for me. So to be politely avoided. There is never a need to be nasty in these things anyway. Just smile and move on.

4 k ST! Crazy. And they really aren't that hot. So many hotter FLs there.

[QUOTE=UncleVolodya;1894684]

4 k ST! Crazy. And they really aren't that hot. So many hotter FLs there.[/QUOTE]Yeah, you be right! There was just 1 girl there, a bit short, very pretty face and muscular body who I might have considered. But I was wise enough to remind myself that this girl would never be GFE. She was a pro. And, she gets many suckers coming in there every night from all over the world. Pass.

Many of these employee dancer girls wore tights with so many holes in them (I was up close for hours), that you could tell that in terms of actual dineros they just did not make much. Because that job they have at Insomnia gives them almost zero flexibility to do what the FL 's do, and can do, particularly LT.

Maybe best, if interested, is to get their phone number and then communicate to find out what's possible and when and for how much. Not for me though. There's a lot of talent there besides them.

[QUOTE=Haven123;1894664]I feel kinda bad that you did not score at Insomnia. I just wish I was there with you. I was there practically every night for about 2. 5 weeks, alone, with guys from ISG and a couple of times with a girl I found there.

4. Also, another important thing about Insomnia is you will find that your game and your confidence and your results get better with experience (as with most things) and so after day 3, you will recognize the regulars (who I avoid). Also, try to be nice, tip well the bartenders behind the bar, and try to get to become acquainted with some of the roving bartenders guys. These guys can be helpful in avoiding bad girls and asking them if a girl is a regular there.

5. I never bought any drinks for any girl in about 12-15 nights ( except with one of guys ) BEFORE I decided that I definitely wanted to try her LT. Yeah, I spent about 20 k baht there on just my drinks. But got a 20 % discount on all drinks ( except the shots from the mobile/ roving servers) with the 500 baht VIP card, and 10 % in rewards money on the card to use at the NY Diner below. This came in useful as I ended up with nearly 2,000 baht to use there and the girls like to eat there before they leave.[/QUOTE]Heaven this is what I ideally do except that I just drink more than you guys and then pick a girl in the club and drink with her so she has a crazy times or shift clubs but that is all in BKK or DXB not here in Patts.

Never been to Patts as I always thought it was more sleazy and I like more classier places and nicer crowds of women with me. But that's just me but rest of all your write up is just the typical as I normally do and I yes I am more old than you all.

Cheers: Pattaya is so much fun I didn't knew. But not for me I more like the city life good places to eat and nice clubs and fine women every lady is fine when the snatch is clean and shaved.

Alex

[QUOTE=Haven123;1894692]

Maybe best, if interested, is to get their phone number and then communicate to find out what's possible and when and for how much. Not for me though. There's a lot of talent there besides them.[/QUOTE]Considering their looks this seems like a total waste of time. Unless they hire some stunner.

Reading this is bringing back good memories bro. I look forward to seeing you take over the dance floor at Ibar in January!

[QUOTE=Haven123;1894664]I feel kinda bad that you did not score at Insomnia. I just wish I was there with you. I was there practically every night for about 2. 5 weeks, alone, with guys from ISG and a couple of times with a girl I found there.

So, a couple of thoughts for you, BECAUSE it takes about 3 nights and at least about 12-15 hours to figure out the girls at Insomnia (it might not have seemed so to others, but I am very patient, and I love to study, study, study ). [/QUOTE]Thanks Haven123, I appreciate it. I actually got much of that advice from your earlier, very detailed posts, when you were active in Pattaya, so I was aware that there was a benefit to spending more time in the place. But the reality was that I only had two nights in Pattaya. The first night was a dud, as you read, but the second was an absolute scorcher. You will see that post soon, just as soon as I can get it written up.

As for your other advice, it is all well taken and spot on. Thanks.

[QUOTE=Kumbu;1894944]Thanks Haven123, I appreciate it. I actually got much of that advice from your earlier, very detailed posts, when you were active in Pattaya, so I was aware that there was a benefit to spending more time in the place. But the reality was that I only had two nights in Pattaya. The first night was a dud, as you read, but the second was an absolute scorcher. You will see that post soon, just as soon as I can get it written up.

As for your other advice, it is all well taken and spot on. Thanks.[/QUOTE]Awesome, Kumbu. Look forward to reading it.

I guess you will just have ta' return soon to Patttaya on a longer visit?

[QUOTE=Goatscrot;1894585]Sadly this is changing quite rapidly. Pattaya was indeed a monger's town when I first visited in the late 90's. There were very few "other" tourists. Low season was amazing with very few dudes in town and GoGos, beer bars, and Soi 6 packed to the gills with gals. Beach Rd was only two lanes and traffic was non-existent. At the moment I would say that "regular" tourists outnumber mongers at any time during the year which is quite a change. Chinese package tourists abound. I wouldn't get near Koh Larn if you paid me. My sense is that this trend will continue. Non-mongers will become a higher percentage of Pattaya tourists. Walking St will become more and more like Bourbon St in NO with the true fun and filth gone and a more Disneyland type feel to it. The saving grace for me are places like Kinnarree. Love the G-Clubs. Perfect pricing structure as well.[/QUOTE]I think this is correct, though I am perhaps not quite to pessimistic as you. As I understand it, there has been a push to Disneyfy Pattaya for more than a decade, but it really got started about 10 years ago when a new whipper snapper mayor decided he was going to actually do it. Things did become more sanitized soon thereafter, and that is a worrying trend, to be sure. But the reasons regular tourists come to Pattaya are three fold, as far as I can tell.

1. It is marketed heavily to them.

2. Accommodation is plentiful and cheap.

3. They want to see the sex industry.

That is, I don't believe the tourists come because of the natural beauty, or the scenery, or the water_sports (legit kind). If they want beaches and natural beauty, Phuket is the place to go, or even places like Hua Hin. But Pattaya is kind of dirty, with nothing particularly special about it (natural beauty wise).

From these three reasons, the first has to do with the aforementioned whipper snapper. But the last two are directly linked to the sex industry. Without monger tourists, the hotel industry would collapse. And without the gogo bars of WS, why would anyone come to Pattaya? They come to ogle, and that is why WS is such a beast to walk through. It is much the same in the red light district in Amsterdam: the number of regular gawking tourists is amazing, and off-putting, but that industry has been around for many decades. It too is changing, but will it disappear completely? I doubt it. Moreover, there are so many other side industries that have developed to support mongers during the day time (like go carting, water slides, all the shopping, etc.), that without us, those industries would also subside.

But overall, I think change is inevitable, and it may very well be that in two decades, Pattaya will be a clean, wholesome city. I don't think that is terrible, since I am convinced that another city will spring up to take its place. After all, the economic principle I stated in my previous post will remain in effect so long as there are male testicles in existence, and therefore an industry will exist to support the need that falls from that.

[QUOTE=Haven123;1894951]Awesome, Kumbu. Look forward to reading it.

I guess you will just have ta' return soon to Patttaya on a longer visit?[/QUOTE]Oh if only it were that simple! If it were up to me, I would be living there, for sure. But my life only allows the occasional dalliance with the cat-nip that is Pattaya.