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Travelling...............
[QUOTE=Travelling Gring]I was gonna keep my mouth shut, but with more brag-reports coming in, I am going to add a few comments to the many posts during the last days. When I am done with that, I will be taking a long vacation from ISG. I plan to make it last forever, but I promise nothing. So you need not worry about me interrupting and disagreeing with these show-off reports anymore. I'll let you guys pump up eachothers cojones without interupting.
“Stuck around for breakfast, and left with a well earned 120CUC.”
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You’re off your rockers. If I mongered in Havana I would be pissed with people driving up the prices by paying 2-3 times the standard fare.
“If you are a pasty white middle-aged guy wearing shorts, sandals and a baseball cap walking alone on the Malecon o La Rampa, you stick out like a sore thumb and chances are a cop is hanging back a block watching "you" just to see what girls will speak to you. So of course girls are not going to want to say 2 words to guy like that because of the trouble they will get in.”
***
How do you figure? Prostitution is illegal in Cuba. Period. A Cubana with a foreigner is an obvious suspect. The police don’t give a flying fuck whether the foreigner is a 30 year old Brad Pitt look-a-like or a 60-year old potbellied, balled American. Luckily I am still in the fairly young, okay looking category, but that doesn’t exclude me from being someone dangerous for girls. Girls do not get in more trouble for being with an old foreigner vs. a young foreigner. The only thing that matters is if the foreigner speaks Spanish and knows the ways of Cuba as well as the manor in which to speak to cops – if the latter is the case, a foreigner can get away with lots. If a girl trusts that you can stand up for her and explain that the relationship is genuine, ultimately convincing the cop that this relationship did not commence today, then the chances of her wanting to spend time with you is multiplied by approx. a thousand – compared to the rookie Cuba-traveller who doesn’t know how to handle it if a cop walks up.
“For me, the best way to meet non-pros is to meet that first regular girl and ask her if she has any friends and then ask those friends the same, and so on and so on. I don't even bother with pros anymore as there a plenty of regular girls interested if you can properly network.”
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What kind of non-pro cubana would want to be your she-pimp; fuck you first then hook you up with her friend? During the years I have spent in Cuba, I have never used that tactic. I have been with amigas of girls I have been with, but not with the aid of the girl I am with. I admit, it’s an interesting tactic for the cynic, absolutely, but I really don’t see it as the secret key to dating in Cuba. Maybe the girls you meet are more promiscuous than the ones I meet? The girls I meet usually fall in love, and it would be pretty awkward to then ask her: ‘Hey, got some amigas I can fuck?’ And would you really call a girl like that a regular girl? I don’t know…
” I think everything he said is perfectly plausible. Obviously these are the highlights and not a minute by minute review of his trip.”
***
Yes, it’s as plausible as if I wrote that I walked around SOWETO, Johannesburg at night and told three guys I saw hanging on the street that they were faggots and I didn’t get hit once by them. I just left out the 20 guys who beat the crap out of me.
This board is not about narrative journalism. This board is about honest, useful reviews. Not editing out to make great reading, so everyone will give you kudos for being one hell of a guy. At least, I thought it was.
I consider myself among the best to work Havana, and I know people who have perfected the art even more. None of them, nobody, gets all smiles and phone numbers. Even the best of the best will get rejected at least 70-80 percent of the time. Be that when trying to make eye contact or when actually asking a girl to come home with you.
Except the now famed Jonesie of course. Rumour must be spreading around the country. Girls are right now standing in line at the Astro stations to travel to Havana for a chance to hook up with this foreigner.
“Hello Travelling Gring.
I understand how you feel, as I have experienced the same.
My policy now is : I only give private info to people that have contributed positively to the forum.
It would be a loss if you leave us.”
***
People want to be fooled. This is why unrealistic, show-off reviews will always be supported. Because people want to dream. People who know Cuba are aware of the hard work it takes – even if you’re young, good looking, Spanish speaking – to pick up quality girls in Havana. Other people will want to believe that Cuba is paradise for random sex with hot girls. But the result will be that they travel there and experience a mongerers nightmare. Glad I am not responsible for feeding fake illusions.
And more on subject: All the people that knows Cuba are now mostly interacting by PM's because the public boards are full of guys who are more interested in pumping eachother full of testostorone than in filing realistic, usable reports.
“I like the reports of Jonesie very much, well written, if all the guys here would write like him this board would be a goldmine.”
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I agree. Very well written. Good sci-fi. It would be a goldmine of useless, well-written novels. If that’s the purpose of the board, I do know better writers though, and would stick with a book.
"I had agreed to give Sayandra 120CUC for all night and for the services provided"
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Jesus Christ superstar. Most guys can fuck 3 or 4 good looking girls for that money.
“Newbies, Cuba is still a fun place, but do not expect to go to the Rampa or El Malecon and pick up a chica from your Tourist Rental car. It is not going to happen. But if you look away from these spot into other neighborhood, there is plenty and I mean plenty of Bollo to be had.”
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Newbies, if you want to have success in Cuba, forget about these kinds of reports and listen to people like El Cubanito. He is one of the few Cuba-veterans who knows the game who is still popping by once in a while although rarely these days.
“I'll be in Havana next weekend, why don't you get over it and let me buy you a bucanero.”
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Thanks. I’ll pass. I see your types every time I am in Havana, and those are not people I share beers with. I laugh at them waiving big money at the hookers at the clubs, then move on. So would probably be more comfortable sharing a bucanero with one of the hairless, stray dogs in Centro Habana.
“Guys who bash Cuba because they miss the Veradero/Special Period days, or because there's no termas should get over it”
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I despise termas almost as much as Varadero, so you got the wrong end of my critique. And you never answered how many ‘no’s’ you edited out. It’s uninteresting now. You don’t do reports that would help people on avoiding no’s and scared chicas. The way you act, you can't compare anything to anything in Cuba. It's a moot point. Any country is good for mongering if you pay 3-4 times more than the going rate or half a year of wages for banging a mediocre hooker. Go to New York, and you can have most girls in any club if you offer them 30,000 dollar. Same goes for Toronto, Madrid, Paris, Stockholm, Tokyo. It's actually beyond being a mood point.
Me, I don't consider myself a show-off. I can honestly say that I don't have the finances to ruin one country after the other with my money. Nice for you that you do.
“So off she went with 50 of my not so hard-earned CUC”
***
Okay, so now we know why you act like a drunk Russian newly-rich mobster when you’re in Havana.
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All that said, if you want to throw around 100 CUC-bills and more for taking home average looking hookers, you are of course breaking out of any kind of monger-league. I don’t monger myself, I stick to free sex, but can only do so because I spend months there and have time to date. But I keep up with prices from friends and from ISG of course. So when these girls are used to being offered 20, 30, 40 or 50 max from guys with an interest in not starting a p4p-inflation in Cuba, you can of course do well. 100 CUC is 5 months pay for a heart surgeon in Cuba… I would probably say yes if some average looking, slightly overweight 45 year old woman offered me 50 or 70,000 dollars to go home and fuck. I am actually surprised that for 120 CUC you are not fucking the models from La Maison or Turquino, but just those worn out *****s from Salon Rojo. The going rate at the Rojo is, for your information, 80 for starters, but realistically 50 or 60.
That’s it for me. As I am obviously alone with my take on all of this. If the majority wants a board with well-written fairytales by guys who need other guys to tell them they have big balls, that is cool. But totally uninteresting for me. I critizised Jonesies report, to my surprise I was about the only one with that point of view. Thats cool. I was really surprised, as this was not the way I thought ISG was heading, but such is life.
I have never understood that editors note. Someone please tell me who puts that there? It’s odd: All the people who really knows Cuba and who give advice and do reports in here on a regular basis, never gets that note. But every time some guy comes around with a report like Jonesies, there is always an editors note. The result? Check out the reports of distinction-section for the worlds largest collection of useless reports on Cuba. Who does that help? Other than kids who want to jerk off to porn-novels? Well, the last part was rhetoric…. But who puts that editors note there? Jackson or regular users?
I am naturally disappointed to see many of the guys I thought shared my interest in ISG back up this BS. And with the latest report coming in from the same poster, I will not use that word without hesitation. Tell me, will one single person in the world be able to use anything from that report if they go to Cuba? I am like... Who cares who you fuck and how many you have in your pool.... If no one learns how the hell you got them there. That's my simple point. Sure, you're a big white man with tons of cash who can travel to a desperately poor country and offer these young girls money like they have never seen before - and outpay any other foreigner because you make money that is not hard earned. Good for you. Incredibly useless for me to know.
But hey, concensus seems to be that those reports are good. So you gotta take your hat and leave when there’s nothing more to say and when you're the minority. If everybody on the soccer field except you wants to play baseball, then go home with your soccer ball and let them play. Anything else would be pathetic. So I wish you fellows all the best in Cuba and elsewhere. Especially those of you that have respect for Cuba and for other tourists and are not just out to fuck the country dry and ruin it as fast as possible. And to all of you who think twice before posting clear full-frontal facial photos of the girls you meet there. In short, those with style.
Me? I’ll nurture my Cuba interest in real life Cuba and leave the bragging where I can avoid it easier than in Vedado: On ISG.[/QUOTE]
Man, do not let people like this guy influence you what you say and do in Cuba. Soon enough when some newbie goes to Cuba he or they will find out for themselves what has been said is true or just a bunch of bull.
For me I have been going there for the last 10 years on a steady basis. I ussually go 3 to 4 times a year.
Jonesies, man I would not pay 120 CUC for a girl like that. There are many, many more better bollos to be had for that kind of money. Travelling is right when he say that. Now, that you may have feeling for this girl and you give her that kind of money, then that is a different story. Jonesies, Let me ask you what would you pay for something like the girl in this pic? This girl will give you mind blowing sex, plus a great great Blow. She is also veri easy on the eyes and she is the type of girl that you can have great conversation with her up into the wee hours. How much would you pay for this girl.
Jonesie's February report - Sex, Lies, & Cuba
After over 30 trips to Cuba in 2 years, I'm coming to the conclusion dishonesty is part of the Cuban DNA.
What is undeniable is that Cuban women are some of the hottest women in the world in and out of bed. But Cubans in general consider grifting a national pastime.
I'm also under the conclusion that someone has convinced the Cuban population that they are smart and everyone else is dumb.
This trip, in a form of bored amusement, I decided to engage many of these would be swindlers and try my hand at reciprocity.
The results are as follows.
First Night. Out of Court Settlement
I arrived late at night in Jose Marti airport with several large bags containing everything from Car parts to baby clothes for friends from Miami to be given to relatives in Havana.
I was immediately waved into secondary aduana/customs. Where I was told to pay 200CUC tax on the goods I was "importing". When paying, I asked for a receipt and the lady at first refused. I told them I couldn't pay unless I could get a receipt for re-imbursement. After getting a supervisor involved, I was given a receipt and was on my way. My guess is that the undocumented payments throughout any given day are divided amongst the airport staff.
When I went to the cadeca/currency exchange window, I handed the lady 1, 000 Euros in 500Euro bills. To which I was given a receipt for 900 Euros and the exchange rate for 900 Euros. When I raised the issue, I was told to move to the side and recount. I refused and after some back and forth, was given the remaining funds.
On the taxi ride into Havana, upon arriving at my destination, when I handed the taxista 20CUC, he told me the rate was 35CUC. I told him that I take this trip every month and it's always 20CUC, and if he didn't think it was fair, he could call the police and I'd wait in my apartment until they arrived. He countered with 25CUC, to which I ripped a 5CUC bill in half and handed it to him.
Three attempts in an hour of being in Cuba.
I went and checked into my casa and took a shower. It was 1:00 am at this point so I went to Delerio Habanera to find some late night ass. I ran into a girl I'd taken on previous trips and figured I'd take the sure thing.
When leaving, there were only pirate taxis outside so I just agreed and off we went, at least I thought. When leaving, the taxista tried to turn into the back parking lot and take a different way. I explained to him that the street where we were on was the most direct route to my casa. To which he turned anyway. Of course, 100 meters into the back, unlit parking lot was a patrol car that waved us over. When the officers asked for our documents, I handed a photo copy of my passport and the girl and the taxista were asked to get out of the car. A few moments later, the taxista came over and explained that the police would press charges against the girl unless I gave him 20CUC to give the officers. I told him to have one of the officers come to the car and speak with me.
When the officer came to the car I waved off the taxista. I politely asked the officer if it was his birthday. He smiled and said yes, and that the 10CUC might buy him a proper gift. So I gave the officer his gift and he went over and returned documentation. When we arrived at my casa, the taxista told me that he would need to take the other 10CUC to the officers and that I should give him 15CUC total, 5CUC being for the ride. I gave him 5CUC and told him to have the officers come and speak with me. He kept insisting, to no avail.
It was at this point, I decided I would test the skill of every wanna' be hustler in Havana this weekend. But first, I needed some pussy.
Sayandra has been in a couple of my reports. She's a solid lay and she didn't disapoint this time. Albeit 10cuc more than I planned to spend.
Second Day. Action Figure
When I woke up the second day, I had some errands to run and went to Old Havana. I stopped by and dropped off some things to a friend's family and was walking back to calle Obispo to buy some gifts on my way home. While walking through the streets, I was summoned over by a mulatto claiming to have the best price for cigars. I walked over and went into his house. He showed me a group of cigar boxes that were poor fakes at best. I told him if he could bring them to my casa later that day, I would buy 5 boxes. To which he told me they would be 80CUC each. I told him to call me when he could bring them over. Of course, he asked to be paid first, to which I laughed and told him upon delivery.
I continued walking through Old Havana and was waived over by a guy about chicas. I told him sure, I was looking for a beautiful chica. He had me wait a few minutes while he scoured his neighbors for a willing participant. He came back after a few minutes with a chubby girl with acne. I asked him if it was his sister. Some rapid Spanish followed, to which I just walked off.
I walked down the Prado and saw a really cute mulatta sitting alone. Which in Havana means prostitute. I sat down with her and worked out arrangements. 30CUC for her and 10CUC for the casa. I followed her to a casa a block away and paid the 10CUC leche fee. I don't remember her name, but she had the body of one of those plastic action figures you see, and she gave me amazing head, followed by pretty hot sex. Not too bad for 40CUC. She did however, ask that I not include her face.
Second Night. Dine and Dash
After my would-be cigar connection left, I took a nap. When I woke up, I went downstairs to buy some juice and soda at the mercado across the street. While leaving, I saw this SMOKING morena with a friend walking near the entrance. I struck up a conversation and we were in the elevator going up to my casa. We worked out 60CUC, and she was worth it. She looked like a supermodel when her clothes came off and fucked me like she was competing in the olympics. When we were done, I asked her if she was hungry, she said yes. I took her to the Melia Cohiba second floor restaurant. Where she promptly ordered the most expensive item on the menu. Followed by a bottle of wine. I asked her what sauce came with that, to which she didn't know. A moment later, I told her "Before I forget, this is for you". Handing her 60CUC under the table. Then excused myself to go to the bathroom. I walked down the escalator, past the men's room, out of the hotel, and across the street to my casa. I hadn't intended for her to be part of the weekend's adventure, but she made herself a player. I had intended to take pics of her when we went back to my casa.
Sorry fellas.
Third Day. Malecon Madness
On Day three, I slept in and met a friend from New York who was supposed to call me the day before. I imagine he got sidetracked the same way I normally do walking around Havana.
I told him about my mission and he decided to play along. We hit a few bars on the Malecon. I'll explain how this works.
When you go into a bar on the Malecon, you can sit down and several Cubans will try and befriend you right away from the next table. Pretending to be fascinated about where your from, etc.
They will start ordering drinks and when the check comes, BAM! Their drinks found a way onto your tab. And instead of the 1 or 2 pesos they normally are, now they're 5CUC each. You are the only one in the room who isn't in on this scam.
My friend and I stopped at a few bars, had a soda each, and left 2CUC on the table and walked out. Usually to loud confusion "Excuse Me Fren", or "Senior". To which the reply is "they ordered them, they can pay for it".
We did this at a few bars until we finally got bored and went to dinner.
On the way to dinner, we jumped into a taxi and told him "La Guarida". A really nice restaurant in Centro Habana that I'd definitely recommend. However. While en route to the restaurant, the taxista took us to a private house "paladar" restaurant and told us, this is better. As tempted as I was to keep playing the grift game, I was hungry and had reservations at La Guarida, so we told him to take us to La Guarida. The taxista almost asked for the extra fare involved in returning us to our original destination, but let it go when we gave him the correct fare and left.
Conclusioin. Effort vs. Reward
After an entertaining weekend, I've reached the conclusion deceiving people, even scumbags, is a lot of work. More work than I'm willing to do on my weekend of pussy hunting.
There are very few places in Havana where the off switch for scamming tourists is applied. I know a few honest Cubans, but by far, they are the minority.
Cuba is still a great place to go tap some amazing ass and smoke some great cigars. But do so with the understanding EVERYONE is trying to shake you down for something and you can avoid a great deal of disappointment.
I'm looking forward to a few days in Medellin where most of the transactions are straight forward.
[size=-2][b][u]EDITOR'S NOTE[/u]:[/b] [blue]I would suggest that the author or another Forum Member consider posting a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please [url=http://www.internationalsexguide.info/forum/announcement-reportsofdistinction.php?]Click Here[/url] for more information.[/blue][/size]
