Seeking Arrangements

I had an SB for over an year. A student who didn't want to take money from her parents. We had a ball for over an year but she ended up in a very good job post that. She is a good friend now and appreciates my 'help' when she needed it. A very rare trait. Not greedy at all. I've moved to a different country now. But whenever I visit sf she spends a good amount of time with me and she doesn't take any allowance. This is an investment that paid off.

[QUOTE=Midwestern;2623397]I think there are 3 types of SBs and WGs.

(1) The ones who are young, hot, do not want to work hard, just want to make easy money and have fun.

(2) The ones who made the wrong choices in life. They use drugs, or picked a useless major in college, etc.

(3) The ones who ended up into a horrible situation. Their parents were losers or parents were drug users, or parents were uneducated, or they are from peasant families or just dirt poor, or maybe the husband is a deadbeat, or maybe they are a single mom, or maybe they suffer from a mental disease, etc.

I have no issues banging the chicks in the (1) and (2) categories.

However, I admire and feel sorry for the ones in the (3) category. And this is where I feel like a bad person. Because do they want to spread their legs to a stranger in his 50's? And so, I try to be generous with them, and sometimes I will help them out just without even meeting them. During the pandemic lockdown, I gave money to two gals that were desperate financially. Maybe I did it just to feel better about myself.

Sorry to be a downer. Just wanted to share this perspective to see what you guys think. I am sure some will emphathize with me and some will criticize me.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Mongerer88;2623579]I think you are ignoring a broad category that makes up a large percentage of the high-end escorts and Sugar Babies in large cities in the USA And some cities in Europe. The part-time lady who is actually majoring in a difficult subject at an expensive university, or has a pretty good (but not great) job in a very expensive to live-in city like NYC, and / or started in the first category and is disappointed with how low entry-level pay is in comparison to student loan debt in many professions (this lady won't start escorting or sugaring at that point in time, but if she did it in college she will still see her regulars). There are cities where the cost of living, particularly when education is factored in, are enormously expensive to live in, and very well-adjusted ladies do high-end sex work to keep from living in relative poverty and having to share space with lots of other girls, or beg from family.[/QUOTE]Yep. I'the say I like this category best. Four of my last five babies fall in this category. Sharp girls with real jobs or school but need extra income to live at some reasonable level. And I'the say 3 of the 5 (all black fwiw) are super sex positive. Like sex is awesome and why not have as much as possible. May as well make a buck while doing it. Smart modern girls. I really do dig them and in some way even admire them.

[QUOTE=Steve9696;2623694]Yep. I'the say I like this category best. Four of my last five babies fall in this category. Sharp girls with real jobs or school but need extra income to live at some reasonable level. And I'the say 3 of the 5 (all black fwiw) are super sex positive. Like sex is awesome and why not have as much as possible. May as well make a buck while doing it. Smart modern girls. I really do dig them and in some way even admire them.[/QUOTE]Steve,

You know I like the white girls and the Latinas. So tell me. Really, what is the percentage of those types on SA looking for daddies? I know you don't care for the "brancas", but you should at least have firsthand knowledge of how many are looking in a place like SA (or similar). Was funny because I was out at a bar the other night and there were some white college girls there telling me I was "hot", and one said "there goes my baby's daddy" hahaha! If I ever choose to go down this path, that's what I would want. White and Latina college girls only!

Oh the 550 is because she drives an hour and then back. The others are between 300 to 400 plus uber.

[QUOTE=NapataJohn;2623731]Oh the 550 is because she drives an hour and then back. The others are between 300 to 400 plus uber.[/QUOTE]Personally, 300 or thereabouts should be sufficient to get many pretty white girls in the Tampa region. It is not an expensive city, and in any case I have had some personal experience there.

I think 350+ is justified only in big blue coastal cities like Boston, SF, NYC, DC, LA, etc. I stopped using SA in those places a couple of years ago. I had a few girls in Boston but has continued to decline steadily over time. I don't even try in SF or NYC. But 350 or less is plenty even in Miami, let alone Tampa in my view. Just have to hit up a lot of girls, hold firm. Eventually, you will have 5 to 10 who will agree.

Simply put, in a large city like Tampa there are enough pretty white girls to whom 300 is a good payday for spending 2 to 3 hours with a dude. Our job is to find them.

[QUOTE=TheCane;2623700]Steve,

You know I like the white girls and the Latinas. So tell me. Really, what is the percentage of those types on SA looking for daddies? I know you don't care for the "brancas", but you should at least have firsthand knowledge of how many are looking in a place like SA (or similar). Was funny because I was out at a bar the other night and there were some white college girls there telling me I was "hot", and one said "there goes my baby's daddy" hahaha! If I ever choose to go down this path, that's what I would want. White and Latina college girls only![/QUOTE]Don't worry there are plenty of those. I am chattting up a hot Mexican girl even as I write this. And actually in one city where I go I find the pickings with the white girls are better. Went off script w one and she became a reg. And I am actually seeing a white girl from 2019 soon who I got down with a couple times. Full disclosure both these white girls were strippers not deep college material but plenty of fun to hang with and bang with.

The way to do Seeking is to browse. Browsing is free. I only started paying when I hit a girl I simply had to have. This was prob after three months of browsing. So browse away. Just no chatting till you pay.

[QUOTE=Pessimist;2623394]I personally don't feel any shame. I am somewhat thin skinned in general and don't hold my tongue when someone needlessly attacks me. But like many mongers, I don't feel that fucking multiple girls is a bad thing morally or any other way, and no, I don't feel any shame whatsoever. But for practical reasons, I obviously want to keep this side of my life from people around me or work colleagues.[/QUOTE]I just want to finish up. With seeing other women, I NEVER thought it was wrong. It took longer to get to the point where I did not feel it was wrong, but being shamed has to do with not living up to my feelings but societal feelings. That is what you afraid of at work, the stress of being shamed. You are a guy, and the first thing a guy does with stress is say he can handle it. I was the EXACT same way. I am just telling you that once that stress was gone and that shame or fear of being shamed was gone it was an incredible relief. Maybe that is not you. I do not know. Just letting you know.

As for your depressed woman, is she bipolar do you think? When there is a hot chick with bouts of depression who is great in bed, I usually think that. I usually find women who are bipolar or ADHD have the best bodies. It is because they have to work out to be mentally normal I think. If she is manic depressive or bipolar, you can be nice to her, but it is probably not going to matter. They need crazy strong medicine to feel better.

So besides being the best looking, when bipolars are manic or women with ADHD being themselves, they are also very orgasmic with the bipolars winning out. I think my current gal has some ADHD but treats it with crazy long workouts.

So there is a stripper I used to see and do it the right way, PPM, and she is so damned good that I see every few weeks for a few months. She turns out to be bipolar, smokes weed, and that seems to control her mania. Still, we fuck and on average she would have 3 or 4 orgasms.

So we go at it again. This time she is like having an orgasm every 5 seconds or practically throughout the whole act of sex. It was great, but we finish and I ask her what has changed. She tells me that she quit smoking weed, and I notice she is more manic. With bipolar, the mania gets going, then your body runs out of gas, and you fall off a cliff and get super depressed, and I saw that happening with her. So I gave her a little extra and told her, "Use that extra to buy yourself some weed. I think you need it."

[QUOTE=Elvis2008;2623789]I just want to finish up. With seeing other women, I NEVER thought it was wrong. It took longer to get to the point where I did not feel it was wrong, but being shamed has to do with not living up to my feelings but societal feelings. That is what you afraid of at work, the stress of being shamed. You are a guy, and the first thing a guy does with stress is say he can handle it. I was the EXACT same way. I am just telling you that once that stress was gone and that shame or fear of being shamed was gone it was an incredible relief. Maybe that is not you. I do not know. Just letting you know.

As for your depressed woman, is she bipolar do you think? When there is a hot chick with bouts of depression who is great in bed, I usually think that. I usually find women who are bipolar or ADHD have the best bodies. It is because they have to work out to be mentally normal I think. If she is manic depressive or bipolar, you can be nice to her, but it is probably not going to matter. They need crazy strong medicine to feel better.

So besides being the best looking, when bipolars are manic or women with ADHD being themselves, they are also very orgasmic with the bipolars winning out. I think my current gal has some ADHD but treats it with crazy long workouts.

So there is a stripper I used to see and do it the right way, PPM, and she is so damned good that I see every few weeks for a few months. She turns out to be bipolar, smokes weed, and that seems to control her mania. Still, we fuck and on average she would have 3 or 4 orgasms.[/QUOTE]Well, I am sure there will be some loss of face in front of people who think I am respectable if they were to know I am fucking dozens of girls a year and still want more. But more importantly, I have a well paying gig and the culture in our partnership is to be buttoned down, no scandals etc. Perverted characters are not tolerated (perverted: their characterization, not me). There is zero upside and only downside to advertising my extra curricular activities.

Anyway, do we need to have a psycho analysis of why a married guy cheats? Really? Listen. I am married, I have kids, I have a nice job, I am a regular dude in the society but I have hormones. I am sure I am not alone in wanting to fuck as many as I want to. I will make it happen but I will not jeopardize the rest of my life, if I can help it.

I am not a huge expert on depression, bipolar etc. I am not a medical person. I did see one family member suffering through this, and that was more of GAD. I thought bipolar people would alternate between extreme feelings and expression of such extremes? For all I know, this chick is faking, who knows. I chatted with her for many years on and off, but met her only recently. I don't know for what purpose because I am not giving any extra money as a bonus for having depression. On a per meet basis, she works out cheaper than the college chick. Also, she is very pretty, she gives GFE but she is not that good in the mechanics (such as BJ). It is more of cuddly, kissy sex if that makes sense.

So far, this chick just goes into crying, a lot of ghosting, canceled dates etc. No screaming, no throwing stuff, no blackmailing and threats etc. But if it ever went in that direction, I will cut ties immediately. There are too many other girls and I will not risk my family life for this one chick.

Yeah, you guys are totally right. I forgot about the category of SBs (and some WGs) that have decent jobs, but they just hook or SB on the side for some extra cash. In fact, these are specifically the ones that I searched for on SA.

Anyway, I just brought up the categories because I wanted to hear your thoughts on the gals that are good people, but they sell their bodies because they feel like they have no other choice in order to survive for themselves and / or for their family. I am regularly seeing several gals that fall into this category, and it is eating me up.

For example, they are single moms with no money and with very poor parents and are from a very rural part of the country. They leave their kids back home and come to the big city to sell their bodies to have enough money to take care of the family. I feel guilty about seeing them, because I feel like I am taking advantage of their bad situation in life. And because my situation is the opposite of theirs. I was born into a good family, and raised well. I am actually lazy and a loser, but because I have a college degree that my parents paid for, I am doing okay financially with a decent job. And so, I feel like I am bad person because I am taking advantage of good people. I did not deserve my good fate and they did not deserve their bad fates. Ironically, they are among the best WGs, SBs, GFs that I ever had.

It's an article I found online about sugar babies.

[URL]https://www.buzzfeed.com/sydrobinson1/sugar-baby-confessions[/URL]

[QUOTE=Midwestern;2623818]Yeah, you guys are totally right. I forgot about the category of SBs (and some WGs) that have decent jobs, but they just hook or SB on the side for some extra cash. In fact, these are specifically the ones that I searched for on SA.

Anyway, I just brought up the categories because I wanted to hear your thoughts on the gals that are good people, but they sell their bodies because they feel like they have no other choice in order to survive for themselves and / or for their family. I am regularly seeing several gals that fall into this category, and it is eating me up.

For example, they are single moms with no money and with very poor parents and are from a very rural part of the country. They leave their kids back home and come to the big city to sell their bodies to have enough money to take care of the family. I feel guilty about seeing them, because I feel like I am taking advantage of their bad situation in life. And because my situation is the opposite of theirs. I was born into a good family, and raised well. I am actually lazy and a loser, but because I have a college degree that my parents paid for, I am doing okay financially with a decent job. And so, I feel like I am bad person because I am taking advantage of good people. I did not deserve my good fate and they did not deserve their bad fates. Ironically, they are among the best WGs, SBs, GFs that I ever had.[/QUOTE]You are a good guy, Midwestern. I don't think you should feel that way. Sorry, it is not my business to give advice to others, but just couldn't help myself for a minute. I also think "selling bodies" has an ugly connotation to it. It is two bodies coming together. The key is that she has a good, fun experience. If she is in obvious distress then it is a different matter. If she is visibly looking unhappy about getting fucked, I don't believe you will continue. If she is doing against her true will, you are not the one who put her there in that situation. Specially not in a sugarbabe relationship. In a FKK, there is some chance the girl was brought against her will. In German forums there have been many discussions of Romanian loverboys who traffic the girls in. No one knows the truth, and how many are trafficked and how many came on their own. As Steve said once, no one wants the cow slaughtered on their table, they just want to eat the steak. At least you are a nice compassionate person who is gentle with the girl and gives good money. If not you, is she better off w / someone else who may be rough physically and cheats on the money?

I again say, it is too simplistic to put sugarbabes in a few buckets. It just means you haven't had a chance to meet more (not you personally; I know you are super experienced, probably more experienced than me). The more girls I talk to, there are more stories and more nuances. I find them interesting, enjoy the getting to know part and of course the sex, and soon will forget them and find new ones. In a manner of speaking, they are like the girls who sat next to you and talked to you on a plane journey; we share a time and place for a brief time and then poof, gone our separate ways. Only memories.

[QUOTE=Pessimist;2623772]Personally, 300 or thereabouts should be sufficient to get many pretty white girls in the Tampa region. It is not an expensive city, and in any case I have had some personal experience there..[/QUOTE]Pessimist I am sure you are right but I tend not to spend too much time negotiating down as I feel it spoils the meeting. She may not be so motivated during the meet, a 100 more is okay with me. Prefer being happy in these meetings than feeling she may not be so enthusiastic.

[QUOTE=Midwestern;2623818]Yeah, you guys are totally right. I forgot about the category of SBs (and some WGs) that have decent jobs, but they just hook or SB on the side for some extra cash. In fact, these are specifically the ones that I searched for on SA.

Anyway, I just brought up the categories because I wanted to hear your thoughts on the gals that are good people, but they sell their bodies because they feel like they have no other choice in order to survive for themselves and / or for their family. I am regularly seeing several gals that fall into this category, and it is eating me up.

For example, they are single moms with no money and with very poor parents and are from a very rural part of the country. They leave their kids back home and come to the big city to sell their bodies to have enough money to take care of the family. I feel guilty about seeing them, because I feel like I am taking advantage of their bad situation in life. And because my situation is the opposite of theirs. I was born into a good family, and raised well. I am actually lazy and a loser, but because I have a college degree that my parents paid for, I am doing okay financially with a decent job. And so, I feel like I am bad person because I am taking advantage of good people. I did not deserve my good fate and they did not deserve their bad fates. Ironically, they are among the best WGs, SBs, GFs that I ever had.[/QUOTE]I'the say MW you are just the opposite of a bad person. A bad person will not be thinking the thoughts you do; he will not care about their life situation. The fact that you care for these girls and their situation means you have a good soul. Not that you are a saint but honestly you are probably a god send for this type girl. They have to fuck every opportunity even horrible misogynistic dudes and who treat them badly. You are no doubt a breath of fresh air in addition to cash.

I think I am a pretty nice guy but I don't like to fly too close to the flame. I had a brief SB once who would ask for diaper and formula money and I just couldn't keep on because it was depressing to be that close to her real life. I felt bad about it and I suppose it was selfish but I am def making sure I enjoy myself in my last 25 years or whatever. When it comes to SB whenever possible for a girl I want to be the frosting not the cake!

[QUOTE=NapataJohn;2623957]Pessimist I am sure you are right but I tend not to spend too much time negotiating down as I feel it spoils the meeting. She may not be so motivated during the meet, a 100 more is okay with me. Prefer being happy in these meetings than feeling she may not be so enthusiastic.[/QUOTE]I understand. Anyway, you are an experienced sugardad. Don't think I need to tell you anything. If you are looking to pay 500, I bet you are able to get the creme de la creme, and extended service with everything included, whatever you desire. Happy hunting!

[QUOTE=NapataJohn;2623957]Pessimist I am sure you are right but I tend not to spend too much time negotiating down as I feel it spoils the meeting. She may not be so motivated during the meet, a 100 more is okay with me. Prefer being happy in these meetings than feeling she may not be so enthusiastic.[/QUOTE]Yeah I was finding in bigger cities in 2019 that it was tough to get a hot girl for less than 400. And that became my max. Then during Covid it seemed 500 was getting more regular. Although honestly I didn't try too hard. My logic was yeah I can prob get her to 400 but that's 100 more in my pocket and 100 less on hers. I have no doubt I will never miss this 100 or even the 1000 if we are lucky enough to have ten visits (looking at you Kayla!) so I let it slide at 500. Of course I'm getting 24 hrs and bareback and complete GFE in all respects. So it's an amazing deal.
(And slightly second tier girls — a little heavy or less pretty — but not both! At 300).

But I feel downward price pressure as we emerge here. We shall see!