Printable View
[QUOTE=Tanglin;1142462]This is a very good way to end up with a bullet in your head. You have no idea how things work in the Philippines.[/QUOTE]Actually, he has a very good idea how things work here. I know this, since I know him and I know how successful he's been here.
GE
Your first instinct is the right one. Do not go to the wedding no matter how curious you are. You would only be asking for trouble.
[QUOTE=Mc Don;1141878]I have been invited to the weeding of one of my ex girls. Last time I would have slept with her was around 6 mths ago, since I moved on and she found a Filipino guy and is getting married to him. She is insisting that I come 2 the weeding. I would love to see a Filipino wedding but I will pass. Too close to this one and god knows what she has told her hubby about me. Also I have a feeling that being the only foreigner LOL there will be too many questions. Then again all the fresh muff there should be interesting.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Tanglin;1142462]This is a very good way to end up with a bullet in your head. You have no idea how things work in the Philippines.[/QUOTE]I think we just have different views. I do not want to go into specifics but I believe I do have a good idea about the Philippines in general and of Mindano in specific. I have it in my family so to speak. After running companies here and there over the world, I would say that Pinoys are, in my opinion, actually easier to predict than say in South America or some of the more orthodox Muslim countries. This is where things went from nothing to nasty in a very very short period of time, according to my experiences. However sad this makes me, the Philippines has been ass fucked for 400 years so I would put my money on this people being one of the most submissive and back bending ones in the world. I come to Phil for family and business, but I see the drunk "tourist" slobs behaving like pigs over and over again, and never do I see these reactions that I keep reading warnings about. This does not give anyone a free ticket to behave badly. On the contrary, we should act with pride and respect. But let us not create some fantasy story about how dangerous pinoys are compared to other males around the world. I recommend people to watch the news instead of making up these warning-scenarios, if they need the arousement to make life a bit more exciting.
Loosing face is a factor in the Philippines for sure, but people eat shit on a daily basis from "the masters", without doing anything about it. Just see how many Japanese and Korean assholes behave in Davao year after year. Or why not look at the American guy Mr R. D. Who now impregnated almost 10 girls in the south, with a total of 13 babies, without taking responsibility for them. According to one of his single mothers, the last is a 16 year old daughter of a hot shot politician. This scumbag is still walking after all these years. Living proof, my friends. My ex GFs lola is a politician and her two muscles monkeys have more than two confirmed kills each. 4500 PHP to have the trigger pulled BUT then comes the negotiation with the family. This can be very very costly if the family has some strings to pull.
Do not get me wrong. I fly under the radar. Do not need any heat or politicians to bribe. I had one single death threat over the years in Phil, but this proved to be empty words by a delusional angry man. I am neither violent or in need to impress anyone with toughness, but should a guy use the mother of my baby as pouching bag, he'd better have the Abu Sayyaf to back his coward ass. When push comes to shove, I think any sane man would do this for his children.
If you do not agree, we can just agree to disagree. I am sure Jon has been duly enlightened about at least my view of this.
B
[QUOTE=GoodEnough; 1142468]Actually, he has a very good idea how things work here. I know this, since I know him and I know how successful he's been here.
GE[/QUOTE]If you say so.
But as a reality check, I ran this by my girlfriend this morning (Cebuano, and her ex-husband is in the Philippine military). Her first comment about the woman was,"She's crazy. She's trying to take advantage of that guy." Then I told her about the husband, the facebook messages, and the guy's desire to handle things mano a mano with the husband. Her comment was,"That's crazy. He'll get killed."
[QUOTE=Mc Don;1141878]I have been invited to the weeding of one of my ex girls.[/QUOTE]Just a few months ago I was a groomsman in my ex-girlfriends wedding and it was a hoot! But it was not completely Filipino since her hubby is European and brought along his parents. Was relieved that I did not have to wear a suit and tie as the ceremony was on the beach. Rather was instructed to wear the traditional barong tagalog which was so comfortable! Easily secured three phone numbers including the brides' bombshell sister! Highly recommended!
[QUOTE=Mattrick;1142744]Just a few months ago I was a groomsman in my ex-girlfriends wedding and it was a hoot! But it was not completely Filipino since her hubby is European and brought along his parents. Was relieved that I did not have to wear a suit and tie as the ceremony was on the beach. Rather was instructed to wear the traditional barong tagalog which was so comfortable! Easily secured three phone numbers including the brides' bombshell sister! Highly recommended![/QUOTE]Mattrick's comments are well-made in the context of that particular wedding but I would think carefully about the whole deal if an ex-gf invites you to a pinoy wedding.
I have been to many many weddings in both my wife's province and Manila, mainly as a ninong (VIP) to either her family friends or to my work colleagues and staff weddings. They are fun although they get a tad boring after a while.
To the OP I would suggest that you ask yourself why are you invited?
If everyone else there is pinoy, then you will stick out like a sore thumb and everyone will be asking why are you there and start putting 2 and 2 together? If the groom already knows about your past history with his wife and has approved you attending then it may be OK but it is still a bit weird to me.
The other thing that worries me is that many pinoy guys get very aggro when they get a few beers into them and if they see you moving around hitting on the sexy chicks it might backfire on you.
It is often difficult to work out exactly who belongs to who at these pinoy functions because the women all tend to congregate in their groups and the guys go to their circles drinking and laughing (about anything and nothing).
If you understand the group and the culture and are well-known to them then I say enjoy and go for it.
But if you are an unknown and an outsider to the group, be very careful how you present yourself and above all, be discreet.
Just a few words of advice from a long-time expat ninong.
[QUOTE=Barba; 1142698]I think we just have different views. I do not want to go into specifics but I believe I do have a good idea about the Philippines in general and of Mindano in specific. I have it in my family so to speak. After running companies here and there over the world, I would say that Pinoys are, in my opinion, actually easier to predict than say in South America or some of the more orthodox Muslim countries. This is where things went from nothing to nasty in a very very short period of time, according to my experiences. However sad this makes me, the Philippines has been ass fucked for 400 years so I would put my money on this people being one of the most submissive and back bending ones in the world. I come to Phil for family and business, but I see the drunk "tourist" slobs behaving like pigs over and over again, and never do I see these reactions that I keep reading warnings about. This does not give anyone a free ticket to behave badly. On the contrary, we should act with pride and respect. But let us not create some fantasy story about how dangerous pinoys are compared to other males around the world. I recommend people to watch the news instead of making up these warning-scenarios, if they need the arousement to make life a bit more exciting.
Loosing face is a factor in the Philippines for sure, but people eat shit on a daily basis from "the masters", without doing anything about it. Just see how many Japanese and Korean assholes behave in Davao year after year. Or why not look at the American guy Mr R. D. Who now impregnated almost 10 girls in the south, with a total of 13 babies, without taking responsibility for them. According to one of his single mothers, the last is a 16 year old daughter of a hot shot politician. This scumbag is still walking after all these years. Living proof, my friends. My ex GFs lola is a politician and her two muscles monkeys have more than two confirmed kills each. 4500 PHP to have the trigger pulled BUT then comes the negotiation with the family. This can be very very costly if the family has some strings to pull.
Do not get me wrong. I fly under the radar. Do not need any heat or politicians to bribe. I had one single death threat over the years in Phil, but this proved to be empty words by a delusional angry man. I am neither violent or in need to impress anyone with toughness, but should a guy use the mother of my baby as pouching bag, he'd better have the Abu Sayyaf to back his coward ass. When push comes to shove, I think any sane man would do this for his children.
If you do not agree, we can just agree to disagree. I am sure Jon has been duly enlightened about at least my view of this.
B[/QUOTE]Thank you for the very detailed and respectful reply.
It's obvious that my comment "You have no idea how things work in the Philippines" was wrong, and I apologize for making it.
Where I think we still disagree (and a little friendly disagreement can make for an interesting discussion), is whether confronting the husband is a good idea and whether trying to be a part of the (potential) child's life is a good idea. You know firsthand how violent things can get in the Philippines, and from my perspective I don't see much good coming from such a confrontation, but I do see a lot of potential bad. I do appreciate the sentiment that any man who would beat the mother of my children deserves the same or worse, and I also appreciate that it's nice that a guy actually wants to take care of a child he fathered. I too have seen guys father child after child and abandon the mothers and the children. Still, this child, if in fact she's pregnant, is the product of a very brief affair between two married people, both of whom want to keep their own families intact (or, at least, that's what it sounds like). Also, taking the position of woman's husband, I'd think Mr Guoren better be the one to bring the Abu Sayyaf with him if he thinks he can come into my life after fucking my wife. The fact that he got her pregnant doesn't give him any rights, regardless of how big he thinks his balls are. Yes, some Filipino men back down quickly and meekly give in to a shitty situation. But some don't. Personally, I don't think I'd risk my life trying to find out.
What do you think is a "best case" scenario here? Assume for a moment that she really is pregnant and he really is the father. Can you honestly see any good outcome for Mr Guoren, his family, the woman and her family or the child if he tries to stay involved in the child's life?
[QUOTE=Barba;1142698]Loosing face is a factor in the Philippines for sure, but people eat shit on a daily basis from "the masters", without doing anything about it.[/QUOTE]Yes, in my experience in living in PI the pinoys are relatively peaceful and avoid direct confrontations. Pocket knives (balisong) are commonly carried in the provinces but you are not likely to see one pointed at you unless you threaten the life of the owner. Firearms are expensive and out of reach for the average man.
If you get into an argument over a woman with her ex-husband / ex-boyfriend, happened to me twice, both times the guy swallowed his pride and walked away. They have more to fear from you then you have to fear from them. Money is strength here, it buys muscle and firepower, and you can get more than they can.
Now if you get involved in a dispute over land or assets, thats a threat to be taken seriously. Assasinations over asset ownership are very common.
[QUOTE=Fast Buck Artist;1142792]Firearms are expensive and out of reach for the average man.[/QUOTE]That may be so, but among criminals they are quite common. Lots of gun incidents in Phils. Often paltik / sumpaks are being used. Checking a few hospital blotters, I was surprised to see very frequent gun use, especially among "bad boys". I had expected some reluctancy to use them, in favor of the knives, screwdrivers etc many pinoys routinely carry.
There was an article in the Inquirer yesterday or the day before, citing a government estimate of more than a million "loose" firearms in the country. This was written in the context of a recently (peacefully) resolved kidnapping by a gang led by a 17 year old. Many, if not most of the firearms, including some fairly heavy weaponry, came originally (at least in Mindanao) from the national government, which armed citizen militias, such as those operated with impunity by the Ampatuans, as a check against the NPA, the Abu Sayyaff, the MILF and other violence-prone gangs. Of course this backfired since the militias promptly turned into private armies for sale to the highest bidder or loyal to a particular clan.
While this isn't good news by any means, given the utter lack of political will displayed by the government to disarm these private armies, it also doesn't mean that the average citizen is armed with a gun, as is often the case in the US, for example. I don't have the statistics, but I would imagine that hand gun deaths as a percentage of all un-natural deaths here are a far smaller percentage than they are in the United States, as are, I imagine, the incidences of armed robbery and non-fatal assaults with guns.
GE
I am the father of 2 children by 2 different Filipinas. I support each of them with monthly remittance. I do keep in contact with them in order to make sure the children are being taken care of. However, both relationships ended badly, and I have no intention of ever going near either of these girls, or the areas where they live. When I do travel to the Philippines, I will not be announcing my trip on Facebook, or any other site that I think they might be checking. The brothers of 1 of the girls I know to be quite dangerous. One (a drug addict) tried to extort money from his sister because she was with me. When she refused to give him any money, he beat her in front of her mother and sisters. Of course, this all happened when I was out of the country, and I told her that I would cut his balls off and stuff them down his throat if I ever saw him again. To which she replied,"Don't worry. I can pay to have him killed if I want to." She told me about many killings her family was involved in in the past. I have no reason to doubt what she told me. But this is the reason I will not go near her or her family. Even if I were to pay a security force for protection while I was visiting my child, I tend to think that Filipinos will side with Filipinos, regardless of the money. Anytime I am in a foreign country, I feel that the locals have the upper hand in a conflict. The law will always take the side of a local over a "tourist".
The story posted earlier of the 16 year old gf having her 76 year old bf killed off for only 4500 PHP shows just how easy it can be done. Granted, that is a very large amount of money for most Filipinos. But they know how to get the money if they really want it.
With all this being said, I want to also state that I don't feel the Philippines is any more dangerous than any other country. I would be more worried about walking the streets of New York City, than those of Manila. One never knows when or where they will run into a life threatening situation. You just have to keep aware of your surroundings at all times, and know when to get away (and stay away) from a bad situation.
HW
[QUOTE=Chocha Monger;1142445]The irony is that many mongers seek them [DIA girls] out precisely due to the illusion of getting tight "fresh" pussy for some old fashioned raw dogging.[/QUOTE]One DIA contact that I regularly correspond with is very open in our discussions about sex, whether it is me having sex with her or other girls. Once, she asked me if I would like her to find virgins for me to fuck. Of course, I not only said yes, but that I would want her to be involved as well, to make it a 3 some. I figure she could use her experience to teach the virgin how to properly please me. Her response was that she would have to find some 12 or 13 year old girls that the families would allow to fuck me. This shocked me, and I asked her why she would bring such young girls to me. She told me that most Filipinas loose their virginity by the time they are at that age. She even stated that she could not be sure that her own daughter, who will be 12 this year, is still a virgin. I told her that I would not have sex with any girl that could not show proof of being over 18, regardless of how her family felt about it. She stated that it would be almost impossible to find a virgin that was 18 or older, even in the remote provinces.
I will still attempt to fuck many of the DIA girls that have contacted me. I won't assume that they are virgins, or even fresh. But maybe they will be not as used and hardened at the pay for play girls.
HW
[quote=hairy wonder; 1142906]one dia contact that i regularly correspond with is very open in our discussions about sex, whether it is me having sex with her or other girls. once, she asked me if i would like her to find virgins for me to fuck. of course, i not only said yes, but that i would want her to be involved as well, to make it a 3 some. i figure she could use her experience to teach the virgin how to properly please me. her response was that she would have to find some 12 or 13 year old girls that the families would allow to fuck me. this shocked me, and i asked her why she would bring such young girls to me. she told me that most filipinas loose their virginity by the time they are at that age. she even stated that she could not be sure that her own daughter, who will be 12 this year, is still a virgin. i told her that i would not have sex with any girl that could not show proof of being over 18, regardless of how her family felt about it. she stated that it would be almost impossible to find a virgin that was 18 or older, even in the remote provinces.
i will still attempt to fuck many of the dia girls that have contacted me. i won't assume that they are virgins, or even fresh. but maybe they will be not as used and hardened at the pay for play girls.
hw[/quote]your girlfriend's story is quite true. i have heard the same thing before. in fact, the term 'cherry puday' in some areas refers to the ****d. one should be especially wary of anyone offering virgins out in the province areas. if you date women in their mid-twenties you'll notice that the locals hardly pay them any mind even when they're stunners. they consider them old, used and past their prime. even the girls themselves will say, 'i am already old' at 24 yrs of age. by the time they're in their late twenties and early thirties it is not unusual to heard friends and family addressing them in with terms of respect we usually reserve for people in their sixties.
as for dia girls being any less hardened than pros, some are pros. others are more hardened and calculating than pros. there are some nice ones getting into the game but you have to catch them before the swarm of mongers descend upon them and fuck their souls out of them. i will usually ask them which bar they work in. sometimes they reply, 'how did you know i work in a bar? '
[QUOTE=Tanglin;1142784]What do you think is a "best case" scenario here? Assume for a moment that she really is pregnant and he really is the father. Can you honestly see any good outcome for Mr Guoren, his family, the woman and her family or the child if he tries to stay involved in the child's life?[/QUOTE]Hmmmm. I do not value marriage so high, so I am very subjective. For me, the only thing that really matters are my kids. The rest are distant seconds. I will take any shit in the world to keep them happy, and I would walk over anyone to protect them. I would shoot myself without hesitation if it was them or me. I could not live with the knowledge that my child might get the same treatment as this woman. But I might be extremely focused on my kids. For me women come and go. Offspring represents life and future.
If someone fucked my wife, I would not care that much. Just a reason to move on perhaps, but I would most likely not even do that. I am not so jealous as a person nowadays and I do it all the time my self. To have it in ones face is not so comfortable, but it is sex and sex is great, so why deny her that as long as she protects herself.
H
[quote=hairy wonder;1142906]her response was that she would have to find some 12 or 13 year old girls that the families would allow to fuck me. this shocked me, and i asked her why she would bring such young girls to me. she told me that most filipinas loose their virginity by the time they are at that age.[/quote]are you sure you were chatting with a woman and not a police officer? .
baiting ****s via internet chat is a common trap.
virgins. lots of them here of all ages, personally know 5 virgins in the 22-35 age group, finding one will not be any trouble, the laziest way is probably going to one of the girly bars and ask the mamasan for a "cherry girl", they often have a few in stock.