Rio de Janeiro Reports

[QUOTE=AxelHeyst;3018017]I have never been a fan of BKK Blow Job bars for the obvious reasons given. I will also add that for the most part, I was never a big fan of BKK PSE oiles either, even though this is where customers can usually receive some of the best massage parlor sex available in BKK. Looks count for me. But there were notable exceptions like Fern from Mango massage. What a great gal! A little bit over the hill, but still pretty good in the looks department and the sex was pretty amazing. I used to invite her over to my place for a morning session before she had to be at Mango. And there were other exceptions s well.

Yeah, I like the way Brazilian girls give BBBJ's. I think they invented the kneeling BJ and multiple BJ's per session.[/QUOTE]I have never been to a Thailand Blow Job bar so can't speak for them but I rate Brazilian blow jobs as the second best I've had in my life. The best BBBJCIMs I've had in my life have been in the US back in the 70's and 80's especially in NYC when the girls would get me off in my car for $5 and $10. No one sucks like an American hooker.

[QUOTE=Turgid;3018230]No one sucks like an American hooker.[/QUOTE]You got that right! In more ways than one LMAO! The Brasilieras are the superior cocksuckers in the world. Best BBBJCIM I ever had was from a Brazilian girl working at Globe in Zurich.

Saturday.

Catwoman comes over 12 h-16 mais uber and ifood, 400,70 minutes cost per fuck per minute still up around 8 ish including the food.

Vagabundo had a stressful week, and he just sat up and played video games slept just a few hours. She comes over anyway, right on time, and we do get in our usual 70 ish minutes with 3 fucks.

All of Vagabundo's technology is whacked from overuse or dragging around into prives. The audio on the Thinkpad x1 extreme has failed somehow. The charging ports on the Macbook Air don't work so it doesn't charge. Oy Vey, what is a good Spinozite Jew to do? Bitcoin is volatile. So are crypto treasury companies, and Vagabundo is caught short and hedging. The Razer Blade 14 power is failing.

Cat comes just in time, she is turning 28, her saucy hips and her happy slutty attitude. At least we have our hoars to keep us happy.

Everyone asks Vagabundo, where should I stay?

[URL]https://www.ksresidence.com.br/[/URL]

Book there. Are. Aldo Bonadei, 166 - Barra the Tijuca, Rio de Janeiro. RJ, 22621-160.

And if you don't stay exactly there, then within 200 meters, search on airbnb, etc. And when you get to Rio, then start your property search there. Location. Walk to Metro Jardim Oceanico. Good security.

As a general rule, anywhere in the world, find the apple store (VillageMall), and stay there.

OK, now that you, Vagabundo's new friend or new traveler to Rio are in your place at KS Residence, you can go and look up mambo perv on analvids and realize he filmed much of his work there. And he filmed at the nude beach out past posto 12.

If you have money to buy property, buy it there, and at posto 10 in Recreio. Like buy the whole motherfucking building, and have some of vagabundo's legit friends from the local university run it along with vagabundo's veteran friends. Like, there's a biz there.

Who do you want to be fucking? The girls on the xvideos at club 202, who can get to you via metro. That is the key. OK, fuck your uber. Get your lazy ass on the metro because that's how Rio porn talent gets from centro trash casas where the best work, and the metro sao cristavao trash casas, to you, the client, who is sitting in your metro jardim oceanico apartment, stroking the keyboards of your macbook air, and tapping at your iphone, which you took for service to villagemall in a 5 minute uber ride. You have arrived.

Metro Jardim Oceanico is Miami in 2080, it has 30 dollar Brazilian hoars who will fuck for 70 minutes at a cost per fuck of under 10 reais per minute, and it has security, and it has the best beach in rio where you can swim without risk of being swept to the south pole, and it has drinks etc.

Now you are done. Just keep buying, and don't forget to have your good buddy Vagabundo over at Skinna for a meal. I am adding Skinna to the restaurant list.

Food / Sex / Literature combinations in Rio.

Here are 5 great food / sex / literature combinations which are best in world. I will set up some of these events this week. I mean, if one has the good fortune to have a meal with Vagabundo, it is almost as if one is eating with Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Jorge Amado, Mark Twain, Ernest Hemingway, Benjamin Franklin, and a Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court (parody allusion intended), not to mention Henry Miller, Bukowski, Saint Augustine when he was hoaring, Saint Ignatius of Loyola when he was hoaring, and the nun from Sound of Music when she just turned 16 who occupied Vagabundo's teenage fantasies as he grew up watching that movie, over and over as his mother was Ilsa She Wolf of the SS, who, actually saved jews in World War II by smuggling them out, no shit, which is why Vagabundo is so wonderfully conflicted, so much so, that his family is memorialized in the Museum of the Righteous besides Zohan, his icon, as Vagabundo is just a highly educated but repressed Zohan, just now, at the age of 91 coming out of his shell as in the protagonist of the finest piece of hoaring literature ever written, Memories of my Melancholy *****s by Marquez, which you should listen to on audible at least before you have a meal with Vagabundo, especially the delicious, hard to resist Ceaser Salad in a basquet of deep fried parmesan cheese over which all official proceeding of the Pimp Legion of Doom of Rio de Janeiro, also known as the (SWISS NAVY) Veterans of Foreign Wars shall be conducted, all transactions to be executed in crypto currency, (buy / sell Microstrategy stock, ticker MSTR! Semper Gumby, Ad usum nostrorum tantum, ad majorem dei gloriam, For Official Use Only.

We will go over to VM, as we did last Sunday. I will be more proactive this week in planning other ISG pussy patrols:

1. Recreio: Casuarino + Paris Cafe. Paris is the best terma in Rio as it goes back and forth with Perola for talent. Casuarina is the best tier 1 spot to eat. It is at Posto 10 in Barra.

Casuarina.

Av. Lúcio Costa, 16410 - Recreio dos Bandeirantes, Rio de Janeiro. RJ, 22795-008.

Paris Cafe.

Av das Americas 15105 - Recreio dos Bandeirantes, Rio de Janeiro. RJ, 22795-008.

[URL]https://www.recreioterapias.com.br/[/URL]

Avenida Alfredo Balthazar the Silveira 1827.

1. 2 Metro Jardim Oceanico:

Pineapple and Perola Negra. Did this recently with ISGer QNinja, a good wingman who brought some cell phones and who stayed for security at termas like the secret termas downtown, which he liked too, a good fit so he was promoted to admin of our whatsapp group.

[URL]https://www.instagram.com/_pineappleoficial/?hl=en[/URL]

[URL]https://maps.app.goo.gl/MbKGMhP1B3qNwM9c9[/URL]

Olegario Maciel 207 is Pineapple. It is a top date place. In fact, when Vagabundo and QNinja were there, girls sent their numbers over to our table. When they came to the table, Vagabundo jiu jitsu'ed them: "Nos somos go go boys. Vc pode paga nos 500 reais por sexo por uma hora, por vcs talvez vou fazer disconto 300 reais". That got a laugh. Later at Perola Negra, Q ninja reported that he had talked to them on whatsapp and that they asked for 500 DOLLARS (what the fuck over! The region (barra) is pricy.

Other good restaurants in the area include pesqueiro.

[URL]https://www.instagram.com/pesqueiro.rj/?hl=en[/URL]

Look, when you go out there, the girl is there for pictures, and your job, lads, is to be her camera man. So, expect fuckery. That's Brazilian hoars, nay, all Brazilian women. They are a all instagram hoars.

Skinna.

[URL]https://maps.app.goo.gl/rLdyGfDKCqxFaFry7[/URL]

This place is expensive but excellent on a nice, quiet street.

La Mole.

[URL]https://maps.app.goo.gl/FJseaMEPtNf1Yn7u5[/URL]

This place is the place to eat carnivore diet for you porno athletes, as that is exactly what mambo perv does at this place.

Na brasa Colombia, Olegario Maciel / Perola Negra in Barra, Posto 1. (Na Brasa Colombia is also in Botafogo, Copa, Recreio).

Perola Negra, Ave de Pepe 400, Barra, Posto 1.

Na Brasa Colombia, Barra, Olegario Maciel 7 (closest terma, and best IMHO for all Rio, is Perola Negra, Ave de Pepe 400).

[URL]https://nabrasacolumbia.com.br/barra/[/URL]

You can expect to pay $250 all in. $160 for salmao na brasa, or my favorite, filet de peixe bel munier, for enough to serve 2. Again, I recommend the limonade suisse. The salada caprese is excellent. Everything is good. Locations all over Rio, including Botafogo, Copa, Recreio. Botafogo is the original, and it is located at the top of the social economic food chain (Exec Talent will hate me for saying that). Again, that's $50 US Dollars, which is not all that much in the rich world, $250 reais is a few fucks in Rio, so it is valuable consideration.

OK, all that said, what it is harder to get in those rich world venues you mention like LA or NYC is cheap, good, super hot Carioca pussy. That's the point. The top tier food and top tier hoar combination goes a long, long way towards being about all that a man wants in life -- the 6 s's -- shit, shower, shave, supper, sex, sleep.

2. Metro Uruguiana: Prive Darkroom / Centro Termas / Cais do Oriente, (close to 4 x 4 too, excellent food).

Cais do Oriente (where I ate today with two ISGers), the excellent prixe fixe menu is $70 reais plus beverage (I recommend the limonade suisse). That's $14 US Dollars. For a 3 course meal. 100 meters from 4 x4 and 65.

[URL]https://caisdooriente-rj.com.br/[/URL]

3. Metro Cinelandia: Terma UpHouse / Nova Capella, Mem de Sa 96.

[URL]https://www.instagram.com/nova_capela/?utm_medium=copy_link[/URL]

Contemporaneo, nearby on Gomes Freire.

[URL]https://g.page/contemporaneolapa?share[/URL]

4. Metro Botafogo / Bus to PUC: Super Upscale Sushi place / Solarium, JJ Seabrea.

Temakeria. Best sushi.

[URL]https://maps.app.goo.gl/Xt483LUgNgJpN1BS8[/URL]

Na Brasa Colombia (the original) on rua sao clemente.

Close to new terma Caribean Sul, are. Prof. Alfredo Gomes 9.

5. Metro Cardeal Arcoverde: Marius seafood / Monte Carlo.

Marius in Leme.

[URL]http://marius.com.br/[/URL]

The all you can eat is $250 reais. Expect $300 with drinks and other charges. But all you can eat oysters, etc. Badass.

6. Metro Sao Cristavao: Prive Massagemtijuca (12 h - 17 h) / Terma Mosaico (20 h - 05 h / VM (24/7//365) / Aconchega Carioca.

Aconchega Carioca, top dish there is a pumpkin stuffed with shrimp, $200 reais.

[URL]https://www.facebook.com/aconchego.carioca/[/URL]

[QUOTE=Xpartan;2665472]The thing about classy joints in Rio like Marius or some super-duper sushi places (Sushi Leblon or something) is they're costly as fuck, just like upscale restaurants in NY or LA. I mean there is nothing wrong about it, but living in NYC I don't find gorging on finer food in Rio all that alluring. I highly recommend Lima for an incredible culinary journey on the cheap, but that's a totally different story, LOL.[/QUOTE]I ate at Marius less than 2 months ago with an ISGer from Italy, and it was $250 r. It's a once a month or quarter spectacular meal for those who love seafood, like me.

I will add, Cafe Marambaia in Guaratiba has the best paella I have ever had.

Cais do Oriente has become kind of a go to for centro mongering, as I was yesterday with two ISGers.

The bigger point, and the point of this thread is that Senor Anaggie and Senor Mr E were saying that all the brazilian chow is similar. I'm just saying that there is some really good eating choices near the thing that makes Rio and Brazil unique -- the sex, which is the point of this board, after all..[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=AxelHeyst;3018017]I have never been a fan of BKK Blow Job bars for the obvious reasons given. I will also add that for the most part, I was never a big fan of BKK PSE oiles either, even though this is where customers can usually receive some of the best massage parlor sex available in BKK. Looks count for me. But there were notable exceptions like Fern from Mango massage. What a great gal! A little bit over the hill, but still pretty good in the looks department and the sex was pretty amazing. I used to invite her over to my place for a morning session before she had to be at Mango. And there were other exceptions s well.

Yeah, I like the way Brazilian girls give BBBJ's. I think they invented the kneeling BJ and multiple BJ's per session.[/QUOTE]Brasil garotas wins gold medal in Spit or Swallow contest of countries. In the past week there were more 19. And 21 year old cuties swallowing down the entire leche with a wicked ass, knowing smile. The cum burp afterwards is a hoot. 2 from Prime Moema, 1 Scandallo, and three different cutie pies from Casarao all choose to swallow gulping portion of my leche. None asked what I wanted beforehand, nope no discussion in advance, no request for an extra present —nothing nada. They just swallowed the load with a satisfied grin. Of course good party atmosphere helps to set the mood, music, marola, gin, redbull, and strong whiskey kkk.

Yup been to Dr BJ, Annie's, Woodbar, Kasalong, Lolitas, 7 heavsn, lollipop, some may swallow but you can hear them retch it all up over the sink as your leaving. Brasil garotas grab another drink or marola and keep going kkkkk.

[QUOTE=Tochka;3018441]Brasil garotas wins gold medal in Spit or Swallow contest of countries. In the past week there were more 19. And 21 year old cuties swallowing down the entire leche with a wicked ass, knowing smile. The cum burp afterwards is a hoot. 2 from Prime Moema, 1 Scandallo, and three different cutie pies from Casarao all choose to swallow gulping portion of my leche. None asked what I wanted beforehand, nope no discussion in advance, no request for an extra present nothing nada. They just swallowed the load with a satisfied grin. Of course good party atmosphere helps to set the mood, music, marola, gin, redbull, and strong whiskey kkk.

Yup been to Dr BJ, Annie's, Woodbar, Kasalong, Lolitas, 7 heavsn, lollipop, some may swallow but you can hear them retch it all up over the sink as your leaving. Brasil garotas grab another drink or marola and keep going kkkkk.[/QUOTE]Yep. Brasileiras rule. 💯 agree on the CIM and swallow ratios. One visit I had 10 girls and 8 were CIM. And 6 were CIM swallow. No discussion. Just did it with a smile. Adore brasileiras.

I have translated the Bubba Boy Guide updated by Vagabundo into Portoguese, which has been reviewed by the Portoguese Ambassador to Cuba Emeritus, ISG Tavares, who has been referred to the place to stay in Rio de janeiro.

So, what you have to do, sportsfans, is book at the KSResidence and go and stalk the fukckckckck out of of Mambo Perv, who is ISG Mandingoblack, so message him, 's talent. Like go there and just kinda get phone numbers like you were at the old Hotel California, that would be Transamerica. Sounds like that is the place to stay in SP too, righto, mates?

[blue][Non-English text deleted by Admin][/blue]

[QUOTE=QueRico;3018666]So you want to kiss girls that swallowed cum from a thousand guys before you? Careful about what you wish for. [/QUOTE][b][u]EDITOR'S NOTE[/u]:[/b] [blue]This report was edited to [u]remove text not in English[/u]. While I encourage contributions from all volunteers, the Forum is an English-only website. Please do not post reports in any language other than English. If you wish to post text in any language other than English, then please include a full English translation.[i]Thanks![/i][/blue]

[QUOTE=BennieBen;3018696]Who the hell is kissing prostitutes? Damn I laugh each time I see a dude doing DFK with bar girl in gogo and brothel. Some dude like hoe gum for real.[/QUOTE]Just about every dude who has ever paid for sex in Brazil. I laugh every time a dude tries to act like he's above paying for sex, yet he he has an account on an anonymous sex forum. Pays girls for hand jobs.

[QUOTE=BennieBen;3018696]Who the hell is kissing prostitutes? Damn I laugh each time I see a dude doing DFK with bar girl in gogo and brothel. Some dude like hoe gum for real.[/QUOTE]He is enjoying life. I don't judge.

To QueRico & BennieBen, I am not criticizing your safe sex practices or the level of your risk aversion. Do what you are comfortable with. But I am saying the RJ Reports forum is not the place to post this stuff. Go to the Safe Sex thread and post anything you want on the subject.

Thank you,

A. H.

[QUOTE=QueRico;3018666]So you want to kiss girls that swallowed cum from a thousand guys before you? Careful about what you wish for.[/QUOTE]Way back in the 70's I picked up this non-pro for a freebie and while DFKing her I realized her mouth tasted funny. Turns out she BJed a dude just before I met her. Nothing a little Listerine couldn't take care of.

[QUOTE=Turgid;3018803]Way back in the 70's I picked up this non-pro for a freebie and while DFKing her I realized her mouth tasted funny. Turns out she BJed a dude just before I met her. Nothing a little Listerine couldn't take care of.[/QUOTE]Game of Thrones porno Sahara Knite did an infamous kissing scene. I have seen in real life, garotas in a threesome passing the leche to the other garota to swallow it all down.

This happened twice in Monte Carlos, Duda massage in Centro & Bel Prazer, don't recall Darkroom, or Eden. There was definitely a leche swallower in Eden, not sure about 4 x4 or Solarium.

The first time I experienced this was in São Paulo Tangará clinica with two morena garotas that do porno films for oscar batty & Mambo perv. Sheetz. They did it without asking.

Because (shrug) . Vagabundo is right brasilian pornos gals are accessible, affordable and easy to find in Rio or SP. Mr E is right too, I am paraphrasing —don't overhype up or overpay a porno garotas in fancy makeup& dress doing porno films.

Sushi in Barra? Perola negra after. Luum, ave de pepe 600.

[8 Rsvp ASAP. Daily except Sundays when padre vagabundo says mass for president lula and marries the president of Brazil to Brazilian hoars as a padre macumba at praia macumba.

[QUOTE=Turgid;3018803]Way back in the 70's I picked up this non-pro for a freebie and while DFKing her I realized her mouth tasted funny. Turns out she BJed a dude just before I met her. Nothing a little Listerine couldn't take care of.[/QUOTE]I am not judging, some bacteria can live for decade in a mouth even if you wash and clean it every day. Listerine isn't a protection, its like claming safe sex because the person had a test 3 days ago.

My first trip report but not my first time in Rio. This trip took place back in February. I was in Rio for about a week, stayed at a airbnb.

First day arrived around 8 am uber straight to the apartment, settled in hanged out by the pool for a few hours. 4 pm headed to solarium to see one of my favorite garotas Clara. When I go to solarium I like to hang out drink and people watch I also like to smash about 3 times. Clara is to me is my Brazilian loira that I fantasize about all my life. She has the tan line she recently had boob job, I didn't think she needed it and one nice bunda with perfect thick legs. Smashed twice we agreed to see each other the next day at my apartment total damage around 2200 are.

Day 2.

Woke up with a rock hard it was 11 am. It was either get some food or get some pussy. Well I went in search of some pussy headed to copa583 They had four girls in there I went with Hellen, her name sounded like it started with a S. Now Hellen performed well she had fake boobs she's a morena solid 7 damage was 160 are 30 min. Back at the apartment I waited for Clara we had agreed to 1,000 are for multiple session BBFS. We didn't discuss how much time she would spend. Clara arrived at 2 pm, we got into the action right away. Once again she my fantasy Brazilian girl. All 3 session were bbfscip. Now the only negative is that she doesn't like to ride and she has a bit of an attitude. She left a bit before 9 pm. I headed to mabs around 11 pm to see anything good, nothing so passed.

Day 3.

Started with the beach and after looking at bundas all day long got my self ready headed to Monte Carlo. As I walked in to the bar area I noticed 1 guy and about 12-15 girls. As I am grabbing a beer I noticed all the girls forming the famous soccer wall kkkkk. I chose this girl name Mila. Mila is a natural slim morena girl from Bahia. As we were talking she tells me that she is married but her and her husband are swingers. We go up stairs and I can tell you she is what you call a real safada. As we were up stairs I thought for a min that she was going to slip it in without the rubber because she was rubbing my meat against her wetness. Once we were done I knew I had to repeat. Total damage was a little under 700 are if I recall. It was around 7 pm and I wanted some chocolate in my life. So I uber to 4 x4, walked into the main room and it's packed lots to chose from. I sat around and started to drink, at this point I was wasted I had been drinking all day. The bar tender offer me viagra so I took it. After 2 hours of chilling and getting wasted I noticed a nice dark chocolate with curly hair, petite but with a bubble on her. I approached her and down we went. When I mean I killed it I killed it. I was banging her rough like she stole something and I am no small fry, she kept on punching me in ribs as I was giving her beat down. When I was done I grabbed her number went up stairs to pay my tab. Now I was intoxicated when I paid my tab, went down stairs and to a yellow cab back to the airbnb this was around 1 am.

Day 4.

As I woke up I looked to see how much I had spent at 4 X4 look at my credit card statement 590 $ kkkkk how I don't know but I had a good time. I messaged the girl from 4 x4 to see how much for to come over. She replied with 2000 are all day. I didn't reply back f that. I headed to centuras later that day. It's by far in my opinion the nicest establishment but the worst quality girls. I manage to find one decent one out of 20 ladies. Her name was Giselle she was a loira with a nice ass and fake boobs. Back in the room she performed well 2 pops in 1 HR was a plus got her number total damage with drinks and all was around 900 are. Headed back to solurium it was around 7 Clara must have been busy up stairs I chose a girl named Bianca she was all natural solid 7 in my book up stairs she performed the best camel to slide maneuver while she was on top of me. After I was finished headed down stairs and saw Clara. I sat around and had a few drinks before heading back up. Up stairs I gave her pounding the third one is always hard squeeze out even with BBFS this time I came in her mouth. Don't recall what the total damage was but that was it for that day.

Day 5.

I started of with call Giselle she quoted 500 are 1 HR. Told her come by around 2 as I had Clara coming at 4. Giselle arrived on time she got into the room and started taking off her cloths. As I laid in the bed she started with a BBBJ. Then she started to climb on top I grabbed her ass, lot of kissing and my dick was rubbing on her pussy and I couldn't resist so I slipped it in. BBFS for a good 40 min. When I mean she gets wet she gets wet, had wet spots all over my sheets. Paid her she went on her way grabbed the sheet threw them near the ac unit and hopped they would dry before Clara arrived. Clara arrived around 5 we enjoyed a nice dinner at some sea food restaurant back to the Airbnb in Leblon I got bangers her sexy ass 4 different times once on the balcony all four times was bbfscip. I tried to see if she was a real Safada by asking her if she would go to a swinger club but she said she don't like those things. Clara left around midnight. My rest of my time in Rio was spent clara and Giselle.