We are way off topic here, Ortos, but the best name I ever found was on a building-site billboard in Istanbul. The Chief Engineer was called Mustafa Kunt. My thoughts entirely.
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We are way off topic here, Ortos, but the best name I ever found was on a building-site billboard in Istanbul. The Chief Engineer was called Mustafa Kunt. My thoughts entirely.
I'm going to Berlin in April, and will likely make a visit to Artemis. But I'm a bit self-conscious, because I'm rather obese. Not orca-fat or walruss-fat, but certainly more than merely chubby with a BMI of around 33.
How many punters my size usually visit an FKK on a regular night? What is the ratio? Are "we" generally treated with respect, or is it hard for "us" to hook up with the same quality girls as regular blokes do? Will we have to go for second-best?
The RF (the Rhein version, natch) finalized their count of votes for the [i]Rheinische Blaskoenigin von 2008[/i].
Here is the top ten:
Mahe at Babylon
Katja at Schieferhof
Ewa at Blue Note
Celine at Roonstrasse, Koeln
Mandy at Babylon
Monika at AC/K
Ranja at Samya
Mara at Schieferhof
Nina at Agentur Caro (she is the former Laura at Babylon)
Simone at Koeln-Rodenkirchen
The list is long and I'm printing it out and bringing it with me the next time I am there. I have Mandy from Babylon on a to-do list based on reports I've read plus her photos on their website.
It also does a count at the bottom of which NRW clubs were named the most.
The Number One NRW club named: The Hof! It makes me want to sing: "Let's go to the Hof, oh baby! Let's go to the Hof!"
Here is the rest of the club list:
Samya
Babylon
Blue Note
Agentur Caro
Traumparadies
Club M
Freude 39
Goldentime
Residenz
Nylon Cafe
This gives you a flavor also for the preferences of the locals (tying to a discussion we've been having elsewhere).
Where do the large NRW clubs rank here, you might ask? Why is GT ranked so low? Why no PHG? What about Dolce Vita on Briedestrasse in DUS, the tourist trap?
Local tastes are quite different from those of the tourists. I think this is clear. The [i]Einhemische[/i] stick with what they know and don't go running around the countryside dropping in on clubs they aren't familiar with.
If you read the RF posts enough, they refer a lot to session money being [i]gut angelegt[/i], in other words, well invested not simply just spent.
The mindset is different: you invest money in the object of your lust and aspire to [i]Stammkunde[/i] status. There is a relationship aspect to this style of hobbying.
As our Gallic counterparts would say: [i]Il n'y a que l'embarrass du choix[/i]. There are a ton of small NRW clubs named here, some of which I've not been to, most of which aren't even visited by ISG Forumers since they stick with the large [i]Grenzgebietclubs[/i] when they drive up from Hessen.
My personal number one BJ provider? Marion who is a denizen of the PT scene having made appearances at PT Dolce Vita, PT Osnabrueck and PT Dorsten. It is a well known fact that I am not into BJs but I will make an exception for her. She does it with [i]Gefuehl und Liebe[/i]. No [i]Zahneinsatz[/i] whatsoever. [i]Schmerzfrei[/i]!
My [i]liebe Svenja[/i] only made it to number 22 on this list! I need to take a trip soon to console her.
Cheers Jackyo.
I will put Ranja on my to do list for my next Samya visit.
Z
@Charles Brown
I've been to all the major clubs and a number of smaller ones. I've seen all sizes and shapes. So, don't be concerned. As for ratios I couldn't say, it depends on the night, but really, no-one cares.
As for the girls, so long as you have Euros and treat them with respect, look after your personal hygiene etc, then they will happily session with you and treat you with respect.
Have fun, let us know about your adventures in FKK land.
DT
[QUOTE=Charles Browne]I'm going to Berlin in April, and will likely make a visit to Artemis. But I'm a bit self-conscious, because I'm rather obese. Not orca-fat or walruss-fat, but certainly more than merely chubby with a BMI of around 33.
How many punters my size usually visit an FKK on a regular night? What is the ratio? Are "we" generally treated with respect, or is it hard for "us" to hook up with the same quality girls as regular blokes do? Will we have to go for second-best?[/QUOTE]
Hey Charles Browne,
Have a blast in Artemis. I have been 4 times but have not managed to make it more as I more enarmored of the FKKs of Frankfurt Main and Saunaclubs of Nord Rhein Westfalen. Read the Artemis forum for the ladies to look out for and read up on the facilities and what you should do.
Also from where I come from the flights to Berlin are much more expensive but then I lose the cheapness of the flights to FFM and NRW in land transfers whereas Berlin airports are linked by train in the main.
Do not worry about how short, tall, skinny or large that you are or if you have a huge schwanz or less than average sized schwanz. Nor does it matter if you are Asian, African or Caucasian in origin or if you believe in God, Allah, Krishna, the Tao, Jainism, or other religion. The girls are used to taking all and sundry as customers. Either the girls will ask you or they are more than happy to be asked by you and will actually be thrilled that they do not have to go sell themselves to find a customer.
I have a BMI of 30 (I'm fat too) and I waddle around in my towel like the tall giant and well built Scandinavian Gods that come from Sweden that frequent the club. Hey, if I can score with the ladies then anyone can.
Its the euros in your valuables locker that the girls will purr over rather than if you have a muscle bound hide. A girl will look at it that you will be a gentle and kind customer not prone to bang her muschi for 30 minutes non stop whereas the younger and fitter more brash ones will be more demanding and want to perform each position of the kama sutra from cover to cover in their 30 minutes. This means the girls will target you over some of the more well built customers to avoid that situation.
You will find that you have much in common with the pretty much middle aged crowd that have gone to seed. You do not say if you are young, middle aged or veteran in age so I am talking in generalisations.
In general in the FFM clubs there tends to be more the veteran customers during the day time but at night time the more younger and middle aged customers come along. Others please correct me but that is my observation. As you can appreciate amongst all these customers there are the usual out of shape men.
Please do go and make sure you take notes written or mentally to report back here on this forum. This forum is about sharing and paying it forward for the future generations.
Cheers,
Basketcase
[QUOTE=Charles Browne]I'm going to Berlin in April, and will likely make a visit to Artemis. But I'm a bit self-conscious, because I'm rather obese. Not orca-fat or walruss-fat, but certainly more than merely chubby with a BMI of around 33.
How many punters my size usually visit an FKK on a regular night? What is the ratio? Are "we" generally treated with respect, or is it hard for "us" to hook up with the same quality girls as regular blokes do? Will we have to go for second-best?[/QUOTE]
Don't give it a second thought. I'm a bit of a fat bastard myself and it has never been an issue.
Frankly, the women won't even notice your size. In their eyes, all they see is a giant 50 Euro note with three legs.
[QUOTE=Ekliges Lauern]
Frankly, the women won't even notice your size. In their eyes, all the see is a giant 50 Euro note with three legs.[/QUOTE]
Ekliges Lauern,
You make an interesting point about three legs. The euphemnistic term I read on the German forum where they refer to themselves is as tripods or three legs as you say. For example, the German writer will say "I went to the club at 5pm and there were many tripods present and not many models. Egal."
That always cracks me up.
Londonbasketcase
[QUOTE=Londonbasketcase]Ekliges Lauern,
You make an interesting point about three legs. The euphemnistic term I read on the German forum where they refer to themselves is as tripods or three legs as you say. For example, the German writer will say "I went to the club at 5pm and there were many tripods present and not many models. Egal."
That always cracks me up.
Londonbasketcase[/QUOTE]
.. Dreibeiner, in case anyone wants to know.
[quote= Nauseating Lurking]There is another senior monger, who tells us over and over again that the real Germans prefer the smaller service oriented clubs.[/quote]
An RF survey of locals based in NRW does not list the touristy NRW clubs which feature most prominently in this forum.
[post]842614[/post]
So I am not making this up. In other words, the most hardcore natives, the guys who post most often on their local NRW forum,visit the smaller, more service-oriented clubs.
There are distinct differences in taste.
I hang out with RF guys when I visit and since they know the "lay of the land" better than I do, I will ask them for advice.
Once in a while they will say to me: "See that chick with the frizzy red hair, freckles, buck teeth and glasses? She is awesome."
I go: "What?!"
Then they will go: "Her service is impeccable. Trust us on this."
I will search Boom's FFM Forum and see if they have an equivalent survey. I don't visit it often as I am not an FFM fan.
[QUOTE=Jackyo].. Dreibeiner, in case anyone wants to know.[/QUOTE]
I guess that would be the equivalent of "a sausage party", as in, Artemis was a real sausage party last time I went.
Atekliges Lauern, Basketcase & Dick Travel. Thank you all for replying and for stilling my fears. I will now walk into Artemis with a lighter heart!
I shall do my best to take some notes and share my experiences with you. I've have eight "encounters" before, so am not a complete newbie to the hobby, but this will be my first visit to Artemis.
AtBasketcase: Are you from Sweden by any chance? I live not far from Gothenburg, so for me it would be cheaper to travel to Frankfurt as well. Ryanair
[QUOTE=Charles Browne]Atekliges Lauern, Basketcase & Dick Travel. Thank you all for replying and for stilling my fears. I will now walk into Artemis with a lighter heart!
I shall do my best to take some notes and share my experiences with you. I've have eight "encounters" before, so am not a complete newbie to the hobby, but this will be my first visit to Artemis.
AtBasketcase: Are you from Sweden by any chance? I live not far from Gothenburg, so for me it would be cheaper to travel to Frankfurt as well. Ryanair[/QUOTE]
@Charles Browne,
Yes please go into FKK Artemis with a light heart and a heavy wallet and spend the wedge on the ladies and report back here whether you enjoyed it or not.
If you have been to the FKKs of Frankfurt then you will be well prepared for the FKK Artemis that is 3 floors of naked ladies.
There are a number of writers from Sweden on this board. To protect the innocent I shall leave them to identify themselves to you via PM. They too fly in from Sweden to Frankfurt Hahn (means cock in German - hahaha) or Berlin schoenfeld with Ryanair taking advantage of the 1 cent air fares. I mean for €1 you an get 100 flights but the times are not conducive to weekend trips.
There is even a Swedes only forum on German FKKs. Maybe one of the members can invite you to join it.
Read my trip reports from 2008 whereby I explain the logistics of how I get to Frankfurt Hahn and take the bus and train to FKK Oase, FKK World and FKK Palace. These are the so called Hesse big three and alll give Artemis in Berlin a run for its money in terms of line up and facilities.
Have a great time in Berlin - remember to do some sight seeing and not fuck the entire time. You will need to explain to someone why you are there in Berlin and did not take any photos or you can do what I do which is buy postcards at the airport before you leave for home. I spent most of my time in Berlin fucking I am sorry to be saying.
Kind regards
Basketcase
[QUOTE=Jackyo]An RF survey of locals based in NRW does not list the touristy NRW clubs which feature most prominently in this forum.
[post]842614[/post]
So I am not making this up.[/QUOTE]
You should also mention the vast number of guys who visit the small local clubs who have no idea about the other clubs in the area. I remember the guy at dorsten partytreff who had no idea that fkk heavensgate was a short 15 minute walk down the street. Or the guy I met at Oase who saw an advertisement and was amazed he was living so close to such a large club.
[QUOTE=Breadman]You should also mention the vast number of guys who visit the small local clubs who have no idea about the other clubs in the area. I remember the guy at dorsten partytreff who had no idea that fkk heavensgate was a short 15 minute walk down the street. Or the guy I met at Oase who saw an advertisement and was amazed he was living so close to such a large club.[/QUOTE]
... who voted in this survey are the best informed of the locals.
The reason I say this is that you weren't allowed to vote unless you had a minimum number of posts.
Guys were posting their first, second and third choices and members of the survey committee were stepping and saying: "Sorry. You aren't qualified to vote."
This was specifically to exclude shills and others who were otherwise trying to stuff the ballot box plus, of course, pure [i]ahnungslose[/i] newbies who had no basis for comparison.
Speaking of the RF (the Rhein version), they now have a chat feature. Try it when you have time.