Pattaya Reports

[quote=mr enternational]rocks,
what made you take her after the guy had already given you a warning?[/quote]

i was curious how it would turn out. that day i had already had a whirlwind romance in soi 6 and a good bj at [url=http://isgprohibitedwords.info?CodeWord=CodeWord901][CodeWord901][/url]'s (from a brave girl who asked to rest for 2 minutes before we went up, as the previous guy had taken an hour, and he was number 9 for the day) so i wasn't really hungry.

it was interesting to meet her. on the way we stopped at the 7-11, and she insisted on paying for the chips and stuff she bought. she really doesn't seem like a scammer. just stuck in the wrong place.

[QUOTE=Beagleface]
Which actually is my chief complaint about Thai girls. They just generally aren't very sexual creatures, in my experience. Compared to the russians, poles, bulgarians and eastern europeans generally. It's more like they are performing a duty, like washing dishes, or like serving a meal. They don't seem to 'connect' to the double backed beast. It's like there's music playing, but they don't hear the beat.
QUOTE]

Beagleface,
YMMV but I have often found that Thai girls are the sexiest, horniest creatures in the sack. There needs to be a connection between you (which can often be a temporary, short-term one) but from my experience Thai girls beat any experience I've had with the Euros you've mentioned. Each to their own though - the important thing is to have fun!

[QUOTE=Bigfoot16]Here's my advice. Lose weight.

I am 65, was overweight, diabetic and had a heart attack. Fortunately it was a mild one, I recovered, started exercising, lost 40 lbs and I don't get turned down as often anymore. I don't advise having the heart attack first.[/QUOTE] go to the phils

you will have much more luck

[QUOTE=GregLondon]go to the phils

you will have much more luck[/QUOTE]

Thanks, I have fortunately don't look 65 and my cardio exercise has improved my performance. I have had pretty good luck in Thailand and China. I might try the Philippines someday.

Phattaya funny times (love sex and adventures)

We all love Phattaya, I guess. It's a dirty, noisy, smelly and crowded town. But what it really has is the strangest, weirdest and most amazing variety of characters to meet from around the gloB. It is in fact better than sex. After you have done all the positions with a hundred or a thousand different women, men, donkeys, horses, pigs, etc. It loses a lot from it's novelty. It's like when you were a little boy and just freshly discovered wanking. Fascinating first, spending all your time with it between the ages of 14 to 54 years. After then it still pleases occasionally but it is not the center of the world any more. I am sure you all agree.

So, I write now about sex in Phattaya and some characters we can meet in the bars and other places. If you are bored with sex you can find it all here.

-

*** My Soi 6 sex ***

Soi 6 is the short-time banging street in Phattaya. It opens business around midday every day and closes 1-2-3am. Usually gets busy after 4pm or so but it is always fun to just sit down at one of the streetside bars and take in the scene. If you are an older gentleman and your phenis getting soft like mine you will know the feeling more.

Just after 6 o'clock I did the act in one of the bars with one rather brown woman called "Joy" in the upstairs room. If you never did sex before I explain how it happened. We sat on the bed. I inserted two fingers in her hole between the legs. Then I pulled my pants down and inserted my phenis in the same opening. About 15 times in total. Some stale yellow liquid poured out and I felt rather weak and drained afterwards. I paid the monies and it made me wonder: "What do actually people like about this? " It is one really overhyped and overadvertised activity.

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*** My soi 6 friend ***

Now it gets a bit more exciting and comes to what is really fun thing to do in Phattaya. Eating! I lost my sperm, lost my energy and had to refill. Sat down at one open air bar, ordered a huge plate of plain white rice with fish sauce on top. Amazing fare! Makes you constipated for weeks afterwards. But that's all I can afford nowadays, living on old age pension and fucking my money away, literally. Surely many of you folks can relate to this.

I noticed having sat down to an unassuming little gentleman wearing a funny cap, like Lenin style if you know those. It turned out that he was from Russia, a scientist of sorts. After mutual introductions and pleasantries I asked if I could buy his beer because I figured that all Russians must be rather poor. He refused, insisting on him buying ME a beer, assuring me that more than likely he is earning much more than I do.

-

It turned out that his name was Pavel and on a salary of around a hundred thousand dollars a year plus a bit extra "from his inventions", that he is selling to companies. He could make more but 100 grand a year was "enough". Naturally I was taken aback, being something like a beggar all my life, always having lived in a tin shed next to a rubbish dump, feeding from foodcourt leftovers. The only time I see a real bathroom is when I come to Thailand and stay in 200 baht hotels. At home we always use the latrine and the bucket.

He assured me that "money is where you see it". I had to object that I have to have the money first to see it but he kept denying. Pavel says "You first have to see the money to have it later. " I had to accept, after all he was buying the beers. Real HEINEKEN in a bottle! I always drink the cheap Chang or the draft on special. Heineken bottle is the rich peoples' stuff. Such a nice, slender bottle, so smooth, glorious. Not bulky and rough like Chang. I felt wonderful having found such a rich friend.

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*** Science joy in Phattaya and FREE beers ***

He said he was sitting here or in other bars most days, just observing the crowds. That didn't sound too exciting to me (being the man of action such as constant wanking, eating, shitting, rooting, etc). He explained to me that his research subject was "collapse of wave function" (or something like that). It means that we affect things around us just by observing it. Just by the act of looking at it we change scenes to suit us. He even assured me that the music in the bar was different before I entered. (How could I object, I wasn't there to check it!) But he buying my real HEINEKEN beers one after the another I wasn't the one to object. I even noticed him wearing some funny gadget on his head under the cap. He said it was one of his inventions but wouldn't go into it because I wouldn't understand.

He was a top conversationalist gentleman, we talked about all things like politics, jiggying women, football, the Dalai Lama, etc. He even assured me that he personally knew the famous Japanees man Schoko Asahara. (The gentleman who got locked in the cage because naughty acts on Tokyo sub ways.) Pavel insisted that Mr Ahasara was a kind of god and could not be locked in a cage. He is not same like us. He, the Dalai Lama and many other gentlemen are actually one, they see with each others eyes, they walk in each others bodies, they jiggy with each others phenises, it's troo. They cannot be khilled, confined or locked in cages and it was foolish even to try. I was fucking amazed, while getting a bit drunk as well after the many FREE beers.

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*** The scary female (elephant) ***

I very much got engulfed in my friend's stories (much more than in the feast of meat before upstairs) when very suddenly one huge brown arm appeared before us, me getting a big slap on the face. Crazy scream and trumpeting. Even the boys leading the female elephant were shocked and seemed in panic. All noise in the bar stopped and looked towards us. One of those fucking animals that they lead around at night for alms was right in front of us and seemed to me rather mad.

Certainly not docile like they usually appear. Only Pavel did not panic. He said "Don't be afraid. It is you! She won't harm you. " How can I be a fucking female thickskinned animal? ". It appeared to me. Nevertheless the fright was over, she emptied all the cigarette butts from the ashtray before us, stuffed them in her mouth and left. Everything returned to normal. I DID get fucking scared and admittedly had to go into the bathroom to check the contents of my pants afterwards. (Some toilet tissue cleaned it up allright).

-

***** One more bang tonight ****

We promised to keep in touch, took each others email addresses. I asked for Mr Asahara's too but he wouldn't give me. I left the bar scared and amazed, leaving the bill to Pavel to fix. As I had still some cash left because of the free beers and to forget the fright, I took a rather young looking chick called Moon upstairs from a bar near the end of street. She swore that she did not have kids yet and she was nearly a vergin. Later it turned out quite otherwise, considering the size of her hole and stretchmarks over her lower belly. Made me remember one more thing that Pavel said that night. "If you lie, you make bad kharma. You carry it around on your back and see it around you wherever you go. "

Fuck, it seemed I made some really useful friend here. Worth more than the two fucks. Plus he said he had a friend in a Thai temple. There was a monk or something who had been meditating for six months and not moved since. Had to have a look at that. Plus I was happy to catch up with Pavel again. But that is next time.

Best of roots guys and have fun in Phattaya. TA.

[size=-2][b][u]EDITOR'S NOTE[/u]:[/b] [blue]I would suggest that the author or another Forum Member consider posting a link to this report in the Reports of Distinction thread. Please [url=http://www.internationalsexguide.info/forum/announcement-reportsofdistinction.php]Click Here[/url] for more information.[/blue][/size]

beagle - going "upcountry" typically means going to "ISAAN" (northeast Thailand) - Korat and east, up to Udon Thani and in between out to the Lao border. The "rice growing region" of Thailand.

Remember that "pa-sa isaan" (Isaan language) actually means LAOTIAN language - quite similar to Thai (70% identical) but different the farther NORTH or EAST into Laos that you get. It's about like the differences between Spanish and Portugese except that the consonant count is reduced to 28 in Lao from 44 in Thai. Anywhere that Thai TV reaches, they understand Thai.

Just trying to help...

OK peter - here's the truth

Thailand made a law that a hotel has to register your passport number or get a fine if they get caught. They register you unless they want to pay (and I think it's more than a room cost if they get caught not registering a guest.) There are "short time" rooms where they probably don't register you but the larger hotels will FOR SURE take your passport number.

You DO remember your passport number??

Or take a COPY of the passport with you?

Do they ask to see the passport or can you just rattle off some number?

muffhunter - find an "open air" market and a seller/repairer of phones there and BUY A CHEAP MEU-TEU (Thai for "hold in hand" - a "cell phone") That plus a 300B sim card and you will have a phone cheap (phones can be had for 500 to 1000B as long as you don't demand COLOR - maybe a Nokia 1100.

That's LESS than the cost of RENTING.

You RENT "JIM" (that's Thai for "pussy") you BUY a CHEAP TOH-RA-SOP MEU-TEU (Thai for "cell phone")

There's a night market on Soi Buakhao between Soi Honey Inn and Central on the left side heading toward Central (khlang) There are a couple of repairer/sellers in there that I have dealt with before. Alternately "Tu-Com" second floor (it's ALL cell phones) on Pattaya South road between 2nd and Buakhao on the right almost to Buakhao.

some (not all) want to see the passport - I have mine memorized

Most don't care - some want the entry card number

I have mine memorized too but I lie every chance I get, usually by reversing a couple of numbers so if busted I can feign innocence. I have one of those first names that could be a last name and vice versa so I reverse that too if I think I can get away with it. Just kind of a general principle.

whatever you want. I generally give my "real" info since the hotel is the least of my issues. IF they don't ask, it doesn't matter.

[QUOTE=Muffhunter]Phone rental at BKK?

I come into BKK then head to Pattaya for 4 days, back to Bangkok for 2, Ko Chang for 4, HKT for 11.

Do they rent phones at BKK? if so can you call in all the above places with no extra charges?

Never rented a phone before and would appreciate any help.

Thanks[/QUOTE]

You can get a 99 baht 'Happy' SIM card at the booth at the airport - comes preloaded with (I think) 99 baht of calls and can be refilled at any 7-11.

70D, works freelance, name is Wa. Use to work Brets bar on Soi 6. They may know where she hangs out now.

[QUOTE=D Cups]Has anyone seen any busty Thai girls in Pattya? I mean, D Cup preferably, slim and stacked ;). I know, I know, not common but I don't care if they are bolt-ons :) Gotta have the BOOBS! Thanks![/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=D Cups]Has anyone seen any busty Thai girls in Pattya? I mean, D Cup preferably, slim and stacked ;). I know, I know, not common but I don't care if they are bolt-ons :) Gotta have the BOOBS! Thanks![/QUOTE]Go to Brazil the land of big knockers and large bundas. Why fight it?