American Women

[QUOTE=Ozzie Trader]I have made 2 trips to Thailand for vacation within the last 12 months. People within my workplace know I am single and whenever I say I have come back from Thailand they will either come out directly and pry into my sex life over there, or do so in an indirect manner, basically I feel its clear that they are viewing me as a "sex tourist". [/QUOTE]

The cat is out of the bag and, since one cannot unring a bell, you need to change jobs! You well know the low level of respect women give men in our society. It should not surprise you then that you are not accorded privacy regarding your sex life.

I do not blame women for your problem. I blame you! You should have known better than disclose your trip destinations to your coworkers. You should have lied to them, say you are going to Europe, or politely told them to mnd their own business, say that your vacation is escape from work and you do not want to discuss your vacation time at work with coworkers.

I know better. Most other posters know better. So, no! We have not experienced what you are experiencing regarding your travel. I have heard comments baout being middle-aged and single. But I am not considered a catch for AWs so they are not dissappointed that I do not show interest in them.

...for explaining my frequent trips to a snowy Eastern European capital..

"I have friends there" (true)

"I'm meeting my buddy from (third country) there" (true)

"I have a couple of girlfriends there" (true-also keeps people from pinning you down for exact details about your "girlfriend".

"I enjoy the surreal ambiance" (true-I was in the city center for about 5 minutes when about 70 hare krishna's danced and chanted by me....walked by a McDonalds in a quiet part of the city at night to see that a bunch of kids have co-opted it into a dance club....)

"I would live there if I could/It's home away from home" (also true)

"It's incredible-you should go" (probably not true)

Regarding being single, our culture is dominated by female thinking, and religious fucks, neither of whom have any tolerance for lifestyles that do not underwrite their agenda's.

B9k

PS Changing jobs probably isn't a bad idea. Bitches are a hell of a lot more sneaky and manipulative than we are, and if they have figured out that you aren't playing by their rules, it might behoove you to get out of there, and into a masculine dominated environment. I've seen a man fall into disaproval for holding alternative religious beliefs, and the next thing you know, he is being fired on trumped up sexual harassment charges.

[QUOTE=Ozzie Trader]I have made 2 trips to Thailand for vacation within the last 12 months. People within my workplace know I am single and whenever I say I have come back from Thailand they will either come out directly and pry into my sex life over there, or do so in an indirect manner, basically I feel its clear that they are viewing me as a "sex tourist". I even heard that a single women in the office (who is typically fussy and expects to meet a Brad Pitt even though her clock is ticking - she is 36 y.o. and very average looking) commented to another about me being a sex tourist and I have to travel half way around the world to get some sex…...[/QUOTE]

I am in full agreement with George90. Enough said: its your own fault.

HOWEVER, I think that you should tell this co-worker that you know what she has been saying, you have witnesses and that she should either apologise and stop this nastiness, maliciousness, lies / gossip and hate-mongering or you will escalate this issue to your human resources managers and seek a legal solution…. The idea is to cause her maximum fear of job loss….

As to your other point: its in the nature of a lot of people to “match make”. I should go on a few of these dates and on the very first date get the conversation to “partnerships in place of marriage”, “enjoying life without kids”, “prenuptial agreements in a relationship” etc… you get the point: issue which will make the most ardent cringe… Feedback about these will soon tell your so called friends that you are not playing the “matchmaker game”.

Regards, Havanaman

PS. Who gives a shit what people think: you be yourself but keep your business to yourself...

ABSOLUTELY under no circumstances ever let anyone "fix you up". In western culture, the odds are radically stacked in women's favor, and any chick who can't find dates on her own has SEVERE defects.

Fix ups are usually the opportunity for someone to appease their morbidly obese friend (at your expense) who cries constantly that she can't find a good man (I wonder why)

I wouldn't bother with a confrontation with this woman, or an escalation to HR. Confrontation merely adds fuel to the fire, and as a hetrosexual single male, you effectively have no rights. The HR heirarchy is pretty much there to protect the rest of your working world FROM you. As I said before, you may want to change jobs ASAP. If the field that you work in is female dominated, try to get a (best case scenario divorced) male boss who has been there for a while (and consequently has probably hired most of the people on staff)....bosses tend to replicate themselves in their hiring decisions, and if she is an self righteous unstable judgemental *****, then you will find yourself working in a highly male hostile environment.

B9K

I happen to be an avid photographer with photos to back up my talk for every trip I go on which is a great alibi.The more obscure the location the better(more intresting) the photos.My problem is when I go back to visit places I've already photographed.I was asked what I did in buenos aires for 2 weeks without leaving the city...if they only knew.
Screw people who bad talk you your one of the very few people who can travel with that you become more intelligent and harder to manipulate.Everyone should be so lucky.
I agree with what was said about harassment it's no different than what women go through.

don't worry, dude. I was in a slightly similar situation last year when I returned from the Philippines. A female salesperson and our female receptionist found out about my trip and the salesperson queried me DIRECTLY while the recptionist did it subtly. I detected a bit of indignation in the salesperson (that I would actually go halfway around the world and fuck hot young honeys even having payed for it). She said (and I quote): "I hear that they treat their men like kings". I thought to myself: "You are SO FUCKING RIGHT, Shamu"! The fact that I was able to choose my sexual partner (age, looks, and body type) must have INCENSED her. She was incensed that I was no longer in the US, no longer subject to the whims of women who attempt to control me through sexual means. She was incensed that I removed the ONE element through which all AW's attempt to control men. ON TOP OF THAT, she was incensed that I was so relaxed and easy going when I returned. These two broads tried to convince me that I should get married, have kids, blah blah blah. After they found out my sexual foray to the other side of the world changed my outlook for the better, they tossed in the towel and accepted defeat. So, Ozzie T, continue to do what you're doing and DON'T hide the fact that your forays recharge your batteries and make Life seem wonderful. THAT is what makes your female nemesis green with envy and that's what makes her conjure excuses for why you are a loser in her eyes. Take heart, Young Padawan! The Force will be with you... always

Ozzie T,

You should avoid any discussions about your private life on the job. The subject of sex is to be especially avoided in the work place! As a male you open yourself up to all kinds of allegations when you permit women to discuss your personal life.

You should draw your boundaries with female co-workers. In the future keep your mouth shut about your vacations. If someone inquires about your vacation just say that it was fine and leave it at that; should they insist on details, tell them that after returning from your last vacation some very nasty and inappropriate things were said about you. Therefore you have decided to keep your affairs private in order to prevent further slandering of your character.

If you were the one making remarks about this woman's sex life you'd have already been fired!

[QUOTE=George90]The cat is out of the bag and, since one cannot unring a bell, you need to change jobs! You well know the low level of respect women give men in our society. It should not surprise you then that you are not accorded privacy regarding your sex life.

I do not blame women for your problem. I blame you! You should have known better than disclose your trip destinations to your coworkers. You should have lied to them, say you are going to Europe, or politely told them to mnd their own business, say that your vacation is escape from work and you do not want to discuss your vacation time at work with coworkers.

I know better. Most other posters know better. So, no! We have not experienced what you are experiencing regarding your travel. I have heard comments baout being middle-aged and single. But I am not considered a catch for AWs so they are not dissappointed that I do not show interest in them.[/QUOTE]Well that is an interesting response George. I must admit I was expecting people to say why on earth am I worried about what others think , and that lying about where you go on vacation is rediculous.

Anyway I am certainly not changing jobs! But the idea of lying about where I go on vaction is appealing and I nearly did this last time. When you say the cat is out of the bag, well that may be true to a large extent, but to put this into perspective, I have worked at this place for nearly 7 years. In that time I have done plenty of vactions across Australia, also the U.S. and Europe aswell as these recent couple of asia trips, so maybe the cat is not quite out of the bag yet if you know where I am coming from.

Anyway thanks for the tip George. I will say thought that I did know this would occur, I guess I just thought I wouldn't care what anyone else thinks, to me that is a great way to live. However I just misread how I would feel not how woman would think, and it turns out it bothers me a little.

[QUOTE=Bart9000]
PS Changing jobs probably isn't a bad idea. Bitches are a hell of a lot more sneaky and manipulative than we are, and if they have figured out that you aren't playing by their rules, it might behoove you to get out of there, and into a masculine dominated environment. I've seen a man fall into disaproval for holding alternative religious beliefs, and the next thing you know, he is being fired on trumped up sexual harassment charges.[/QUOTE]

That is the reason for my suggestion to change jobs; to avoid a sexual harassment accusation or worse. From stories I have heard, and frm the attitude of many women, I would not put it past a woman to report OT to the police, or other law enforcement (FBI) accusing him of having sex with minors or travelling for the purpose of illegal sex.

I hope EVERYONE knows and fully understands that it is against US law for a US citizen or US permanent resident to travel abroad for the purpose of engaging in prostitution. The law is rarely enforced, so far only for sex with minors. But it is INSANE to have one's coworkers gossiping about your having sex with prostitiutes in Thailand. It WILL get to someone in LE, via a feminist, and you will have to explain a HIGHLY exaggerated story to a detective threatening you with arrest.

With all due respect, **I don't want to start a flame war**, but you guys who are advising OT to flaunt his mongering to women in their faces at his job, are just plain dumb.

[QUOTE=Havanaman]I am in full agreement with George90. Enough said: its your own fault.

HOWEVER, I think that you should tell this co-worker that you know what she has been saying, you have witnesses and that she should either apologise and stop this nastiness, maliciousness, lies / gossip and hate-mongering or you will escalate this issue to your human resources managers and seek a legal solution. The idea is to cause her maximum fear of job loss.

As to your other point: its in the nature of a lot of people to “match make”. I should go on a few of these dates and on the very first date get the conversation to “partnerships in place of marriage”, “enjoying life without kids”, “prenuptial agreements in a relationship” etc… you get the point: issue which will make the most ardent cringe… Feedback about these will soon tell your so called friends that you are not playing the “matchmaker game”.

Regards, Havanaman

PS. Who gives a shit what people think: you be yourself but keep your business to yourself...[/QUOTE]Thanks Havanaman and anyone replying about this topic. I just wanted to say that confronting this woman or turning this into a HR issue is way out of the question. This annoyed me a little, enough to post here about it, but no where near enough to make a big issue about it, I am not slashing my wrists over the event.

Your last quote was interesting, as it is hard to be myself yet keep such a significant part about myself private. And when I say this I am not talking or referring about mongering. Whilst a massive part of my Thailand trips are the women, also a big part is travelling in general, hence my many holidays through America and Europe destinations that are not known as sex tourist locations. So it is a bit unusual for me to jetset across the world and not come back and talk about my travels as a lot of people are interested, so it will not be that easy to lie, I guess I will have to get used to it.

[QUOTE=George90]That is the reason for my suggestion to change jobs; to avoid a sexual harassment accusation or worse. From stories I have heard, and frm the attitude of many women, I would not put it past a woman to report OT to the police, or other law enforcement (FBI) accusing him of having sex with minors or travelling for the purpose of illegal sex.

I hope EVERYONE knows and fully understands that it is against US law for a US citizen or US permanent resident to travel abroad for the purpose of engaging in prostitution. The law is rarely enforced, so far only for sex with minors. But it is INSANE to have one's coworkers gossiping about your having sex with prostitiutes in Thailand. It WILL get to someone in LE, via a feminist, and you will have to explain a HIGHLY exaggerated story to a detective threatening you with arrest.

With all due respect, **I don't want to start a flame war**, but you guys who are advising OT to flaunt his mongering to women in their faces at his job, are just plain dumb.[/QUOTE]I also want to clarify I have never talked about my sexual exploits over there. It is just often assumed. If a conversation starts to head that way from someone else I always say I had no luck with the women or whatever. Maybe that is why the whole thing bothers me, I have never said I had any sort of relationship with women over there.

[QUOTE=George90]That is the reason for my suggestion to change jobs; to avoid a sexual harassment accusation or worse. From stories I have heard, and frm the attitude of many women, I would not put it past a woman to report OT to the police, or other law enforcement (FBI) accusing him of having sex with minors or travelling for the purpose of illegal sex.

I hope EVERYONE knows and fully understands that it is against US law for a US citizen or US permanent resident to travel abroad for the purpose of engaging in prostitution. The law is rarely enforced, so far only for sex with minors. But it is INSANE to have one's coworkers gossiping about your having sex with prostitiutes in Thailand. It WILL get to someone in LE, via a feminist, and you will have to explain a HIGHLY exaggerated story to a detective threatening you with arrest.

With all due respect, **I don't want to start a flame war**, but you guys who are advising OT to flaunt his mongering to women in their faces at his job, are just plain dumb.[/QUOTE]So it is common for women to report single men in the 30's for holidaying in Thailand to the police because it is speculated they are visiting for illegal sex? Come on lets not get too carried away.

[QUOTE=Artisttyp]I happen to be an avid photographer with photos to back up my talk for every trip I go on which is a great alibi.The more obscure the location the better(more intresting) the photos.My problem is when I go back to visit places I've already photographed.I was asked what I did in buenos aires for 2 weeks without leaving the city...if they only knew.

Screw people who bad talk you your one of the very few people who can travel with that you become more intelligent and harder to manipulate.Everyone should be so lucky.

I agree with what was said about harassment it's no different than what women go through.[/QUOTE]You could say the same for me too. As I have said I have worked at this place for nearly 7 years, done trips to America and many European destinations and came back with many photos ( the tourist type not the mongering type!) before the latest trips to Thailand. With Thailand when I went the second time I said I went to check out different places to the first trip after hearing good reports and I came back with different photos of different places. And years before I have done second trips to the same country for the same reason. But as far as Thailand goes, it seems if you are a single male, no matter what excuses you are have for going there, it is guaranteed women will assume you are a sex tourist, no doubt about it.

I'm DUMB for knowing my boss is an Alpha male type who gets off on the types of exploits I went through in the Philippines. I'd be TRULY dumb if I actually spoke IN DETAIL about what happened on my trip to these broads. The fact is that I only told said broads that I WENT to the Philippines and their imaginations supplied the REST. I didn't dissuade them from what they thought. If they wanted to bring me up on sexual harassment charges as someone who is willing to point an accusing finger SUGGESTS, they would have only their accusations (NOT supported by the rest of my company AT ALL). That being said, if I'd be accused by the Thought Police, then I'd have no defense at all and I'd be GUILTY simply because their agents SAID SO.

So, Ozz, be subtle about it. I NEVER said to be graphic about your exploits as someone ASSUMED. If these harpies wanna charge you for sexual harassment simply because they INFERRED that you had sex with younger women, the burden of proof is upon THEM. If it's found out that they cried wolf (as I'm sure it will be) more people in your company will be enlightened to that fact.

I was going to bring up earlier after Sin's first post, that it depends on your work environment how big a deal this is...Sin pointed out that there really isn't too much to be done if there is a manly man in charge of your work environment, the bitches aren't in a power position (like married to the owner)and there (appearently) isn't an HR department for them to go crying to. Conversely, if your immediate supervisor is a chick, and you work for a big lawsuit adverse corporation,, you could have a problem. Remember by the way that women generally do not have any sense of fair play, and don't see a problem with ruining your career because they judgementally don't approve of your vacation activities.

I also have to point out that OT is from Oz. We have possibly mistakenly assumed that Oz's sexual harassment laws are as wacko as those in the US (almost any behavior can labled SH at the whim of any woman-----I once had a complaint which was in part due to me being "too nice"). I do not definitively know this, but it may be that it (the wacky laws) are not the case.

One more thing about the match making deal-I have a very nice, very friendly female cousin that doesn't really talk to me anymore when I declined to continue seeing her best friend (a 300 pounder-she was nice at least but..) after a blind date. I was kind and respectful to the girl but it was a no win situation, that I recommend staying out of by categorically rejecting "fix ups"

B9k