General Reports

[QUOTE=Phordphan;1343798]Man, I thought I'd never miss that stupid new overpass.[/QUOTE]Dude! I miss that stupid new overpass every damn weekend! The new entree is a cluster fuck to say the least.

BTW, great trip report.

[QUOTE=Phordphan;1343798]I finally arrived at the border and found my way through that infernal mess they call a border crossing. Man, I thought I'd never miss that stupid new overpass. Flagged a Libre at the roundabout south of McDonalds and. 50 pesos later, found myself at the Ticuan.[/QUOTE]A tip with the new entry: instead of going over the overpass south of the entry and over towards the McDonalds, turn left and go up the hill about 50 meters. There are taxis up there that will take the same 50 pesos to go to Revolution (Ticuan) or the Zona bars. From where they start they go over a bridge and end up at the same roundabout you walked to within a few seconds.

I headed down Revu to Calle 6, where all the action is. It was just starting to get busy, and loads of kids were running around in full costume. There were some really creative ones, like the guy in the full Iron Man suit, and the Scotsman with a giant life-like dildo hung around his waist. He had a sign on the front inviting inquiries about what's under the Scotsman's kilt. He'the then lift it up and everybody would have a good laugh.

First stop was Dandy del Sur. I like this joint because it's so old-school. But, being around 10, it was still pretty slow and nobody to talk to. I had a beer, listened to the juke box a bit and left.

Next, I wandered back up to Revu and over to 7th. Somebody said that Bar Manolo was a handjob bar and I wanted to verify that. Either I had the wrong place of somebody is full of sh*t. It's two halves, the west half is a karaoke room (and quite busy) , the other a non-descript bar. I sat at the bar next to some dude who had a beer in front of him and was passed out cold. Head down on the bar and not moving a muscle. The bartenders and waitresses just ignored him. I had another beer, watched some guy do karaoke alone (he was pretty good) , took a leak and hit the road. Don't see any reason to come back here.

Back to sexta. I'the seen it earlier, so I stopped into the little tequila shop just to the west of Dandy. It's a little joint with low tables and seats with a friendly, rotund waitress and equally rotund barkeep wearing illuminated horns. I asked the waitress what her favorite was, as they probably had 50 tequilas on the wall behind the bar. She said something about a particular version of Patron, so I said OK. It was good, but nothing earthshaking. I sat down, sipped it for a bit and watched the only other people in the place – a maricon and three fag hags. I got up to pay and handed the barkeep a 50p note. She looked at it and told me it was 90 pesos! WTF? It certainly wasn't THAT good. I gave her 100 and wasn't offered change. Oh, well. Scratch this one off the list.

Next stop, La Mezcalera. It's immediately opposite. Now, this is kind of a cool place. It has a large front area with seats and a bar. There is a wall separating the back area, which has interesting lighting, banquettes, sort of a dance floor. A rather funky sort of hi-tech vibe. Anyway, I sat at the bar. They have several different Mezcals, varying by age, and some Mezcal-based drinks. To be honest, I'the never had it before. I asked the bartender what his favorite was, and he said the Reposado. So, why not?

The reposado is smooth, and very smoky. One of my favorite single malts is Lagavulin, a very smoky Islay. This wasn't identical, but just about as close as you can get. Mmmm. They serve it with orange slices. Mr. Barkeep explained that it brought out the taste much better than lime. And he was correct! This shit seems pretty strong and I suspected it would knock me on my ass if I kept at it. So, I called it quits after one. Damage was 40 pesos and 10 for the bartender.

Out the door and into the throng of princesses, witches, bikers, goblins and ghouls. I went next door to La Tropical, not to be confused with another famous bar of the same name. Very long bar populated entirely by locals. At one end sat a couple of barflies. I sat a few seats away, ordered a beer, got situated, and then said hello.

That was what they were waiting for. Ms. V and Ms. B are regulars, both in their early 50s, IIRC. They were plowing through the large family-style Tecate Lights, sharing them between themselves. After a minute or two, they invited me over and we proceeded to get to know each other better. Then one moved and had me sit between them.

So, for the next few hours we schmoozed, played a bit of grab-ass, danced to some Pit Bull I put on the jukebox, and consumed a lot of beer. Everybody in the place knew them; they all stopped by to say hi, everybody was very friendly. I guess I was their sucker-du-jour, LOL. During all of this, three of their friends came in and sat next to us. Ma and Pa Kettle and a younger friend, Ms. R. Pa is a friendly local in his 50s, Ma is his long-suffering wife and their friend, Ms. R, was a rather attractive lady in her 40s.

Towards the end of the evening, both Ms. V and Ms. B asked for $20 (each) for 'cab fare. ' Right! Oh, well, WTF. I gave them each 200 pesos. But I wanted to pay the check first, to see if I had enough. I had 3 beers, maybe 4. They had 3 large between them. Total damage was under 200 pesos. So, we had another large beer between us and Ms. V had a couple of Palomas. During all of this, we were yakking and schmoozing with their friends, the Kettles.

For fun, I tried to get Ms. V or Ms. B to come back to my room with me. Ms. B giggled and smiled, but refused. Ms. V said OK, but it would cost me 1, 000 pesos. Nope, ain't going to happen. But we all exchanged numbers and I'm supposed to contact them next visit. We'll see.

So, sometime just before 2:00am, the place was winding down. The bartender was cleaning up and it was time to say goodbye. I kissed the Pigeon Sisters goodbye and was going to finish my beer and leave. But fate intervened. Mr. Kettle, who was about half lit by now, had been toasting me, shaking my hand, doing fist bumps, etc, all night. Now he decided we all needed to go to Las Estrellas, next door.

I had my doubts, and funds were running low. I indicated they I was short on money by just pulling out all my money and showing him. It was a $10 bill and about 400 pesos in assorted denominations. He took one look and said yes, that was plenty. So, off we went.

We got a table in the back. I got to sit next to Ms. R. She's about a 6. 5 and probably a 7 if she lost about 10 pounds. Very nice, and not drinking at all because she had to drive later. She loves to dance, and has no problem with the slow, close ones as well as the fast ones. We got along very well. Nice.

We ordered beers. They came. Next thing you know, Pa wants a cubeta. Now I've already had 6 or 7 beers, tequila and mescal. I really don't think this is a good idea. But who am I to argue? It's loud, I can't understand a word he's saying. I know he wants some money. I pull out my stash and he takes $10 and hands it to the waiter. Waiter takes off, then comes back. He speaks to Ma, who digs in her wallet and hands the waiter some more (no idea how much). Waiter buzzes off and returns with a big-ass bucket full of 10 full-size Tecates. OMG.

I take one, Pa takes one. Ma apparently doesn't like Tecate, and orders something lighter. Ms. R isn't drinking. Man, my work is cut out for me. I really don't think I can keep up my half of the deal.

As the night wears on, we drink. We dance our asses off. I dance with Ms. R. I dance with Ma. I dance with some chick who caught my eye during a particularly peppy number. Pa is getting more and more shitfaced. I pretend to take long pulls at my beer, but only sip. If I do all 5 beers, I'm going to puke. Been there, done that, and don't want to do it again.

Eventually, the crowd begins to thin. The lights start to come up ever so slightly. I figure it's getting close to closing time. I know I've hit the wall. I can't dance another dance, or drink another beer. I made sure I had Ms. R's number handy, I kissed Ma, I kissed Ms. R. Pa had fallen asleep and couldn't be roused, so I just waved at him. I made my way through the groups of people and hit the door.

Once outside, I looked at my watch. OMG! Holy Shit! It's 6:00 am in the fucking morning. I haven't done this in ages. Suddenly I'm starving. I staggered up to the hot dog cart on the corner and wolfed down two. Then to Oxxo to get some water and something sweet to help metabolize the alcohol. Then to the taco stand outside Ticuan because 2 hotdogs weren't enough.

I made it to bed just after 6:30. I had to get up earlier than normal because I was afraid all the track construction might stretch my trolley trip from 45 minutes to almost 90. So. 4 hours later I'm staggering around the room, trying to make coffee and take a shower.

When I was coherent, Ms. R and I exchanged some sweet text messages, so I know the number is legit. I promised to contact her again in 3 weeks when I visit again. It'll be kinda cool to hang with a civilian for a change.

I got to the border about 12:30 and onto the trolley. The trip normally takes 45 minutes, but I'm expecting longer, based upon my experience on Saturday. So, of course, there were absolutely no delays this time. The additional delay was exactly 5 minutes. Figures. I could have slept another hour.

Luckily, I got on the earlier train, so it all worked out.

In the end, everybody had a good time. Entire damages, from start to finish, was about $200, not including room. As I said, if you go with the flow, you'll meet some really interesting people in Tijuana, and you may have a good time to boot.

Because the new border entry is now open on the same side, the owner wants to cash in and now it is $7 for 8 hours. I'm not a cheap person, but out of principle I will boycott the lot in the future.

Just my 2 pesos.

I should have pointed it out at the time but the poster who thought it was a hand job bar got tripped up by confusion over a slang term for a hand job which is una manuela. He thought it was manolo. Any way thanks for taking the time to write up such a very informative trip report complete with prices. As for La Estrella although I like the music I haven't seen very many attractive chicas there. Tom Jackin has posted about the place on several occasions. Before Las Pulgas opened this place was really jumping.

[QUOTE=Phordphan; 1344166]I headed down Revu to Calle 6, where all the action is. It was just starting to get busy, and loads of kids were running around in full costume. There were some really creative ones, like the guy in the full Iron Man suit, and the Scotsman with a giant life-like dildo hung around his waist. He had a sign on the front inviting inquiries about what's under the Scotsman's kilt. He'the then lift it up and everybody would have a good laugh.

First stop was Dandy del Sur. I like this joint because it's so old-school. But, being around 10, it was still pretty slow and nobody to talk to. I had a beer, listened to the juke box a bit and left.

Next, I wandered back up to Revu and over to 7th. Somebody said that Bar Manolo was a handjob bar and I wanted to verify that. Either I had the wrong place of somebody is full of sh*t. It's two halves, the west half is a karaoke room (and quite busy) , the other a non-descript bar. I sat at the bar next to some dude who had a beer in front of him and was passed out cold. Head down on the bar and not moving a muscle. The bartenders and waitresses just ignored him. I had another beer, watched some guy do karaoke alone (he was pretty good) , took a leak and hit the road. Don't see any reason to come back here.

Back to sexta. I'the seen it earlier, so I stopped into the little tequila shop just to the west of Dandy. It's a little joint with low tables and seats with a friendly, rotund waitress and equally rotund barkeep wearing illuminated horns. I asked the waitress what her favorite was, as they probably had 50 tequilas on the wall behind the bar. She said something about a particular version of Patron, so I said OK. It was good, but nothing earthshaking. I sat down, sipped it for a bit and watched the only other people in the place – a maricon and three fag hags. I got up to pay and handed the barkeep a 50p note. She looked at it and told me it was 90 pesos! WTF? It certainly wasn't THAT good. I gave her 100 and wasn't offered change. Oh, well. Scratch this one off the list.

Next stop, La Mezcalera. It's immediately opposite. Now, this is kind of a cool place. It has a large front area with seats and a bar. There is a wall separating the back area, which has interesting lighting, banquettes, sort of a dance floor. A rather funky sort of hi-tech vibe. Anyway, I sat at the bar. They have several different Mezcals, varying by age, and some Mezcal-based drinks. To be honest, I'the never had it before. I asked the bartender what his favorite was, and he said the Reposado. So, why not?

The reposado is smooth, and very smoky. One of my favorite single malts is Lagavulin, a very smoky Islay. This wasn't identical, but just about as close as you can get. Mmmm. They serve it with orange slices. Mr. Barkeep explained that it brought out the taste much better than lime. And he was correct! This shit seems pretty strong and I suspected it would knock me on my ass if I kept at it. So, I called it quits after one. Damage was 40 pesos and 10 for the bartender.

Out the door and into the throng of princesses, witches, bikers, goblins and ghouls. I went next door to La Tropical, not to be confused with another famous bar of the same name. Very long bar populated entirely by locals. At one end sat a couple of barflies. I sat a few seats away, ordered a beer, got situated, and then said hello.

That was what they were waiting for. Ms. V and Ms. B are regulars, both in their early 50s, IIRC. They were plowing through the large family-style Tecate Lights, sharing them between themselves. After a minute or two, they invited me over and we proceeded to get to know each other better. Then one moved and had me sit between them.

So, for the next few hours we schmoozed, played a bit of grab-ass, danced to some Pit Bull I put on the jukebox, and consumed a lot of beer. Everybody in the place knew them; they all stopped by to say hi, everybody was very friendly. I guess I was their sucker-du-jour, LOL. During all of this, three of their friends came in and sat next to us. Ma and Pa Kettle and a younger friend, Ms. R. Pa is a friendly local in his 50s, Ma is his long-suffering wife and their friend, Ms. R, was a rather attractive lady in her 40s.

Towards the end of the evening, both Ms. V and Ms. B asked for $20 (each) for 'cab fare. ' Right! Oh, well, WTF. I gave them each 200 pesos. But I wanted to pay the check first, to see if I had enough. I had 3 beers, maybe 4. They had 3 large between them. Total damage was under 200 pesos. So, we had another large beer between us and Ms. V had a couple of Palomas. During all of this, we were yakking and schmoozing with their friends, the Kettles.

For fun, I tried to get Ms. V or Ms. B to come back to my room with me. Ms. B giggled and smiled, but refused. Ms. V said OK, but it would cost me 1, 000 pesos. Nope, ain't going to happen. But we all exchanged numbers and I'm supposed to contact them next visit. We'll see.

So, sometime just before 2:00am, the place was winding down. The bartender was cleaning up and it was time to say goodbye. I kissed the Pigeon Sisters goodbye and was going to finish my beer and leave. But fate intervened. Mr. Kettle, who was about half lit by now, had been toasting me, shaking my hand, doing fist bumps, etc, all night. Now he decided we all needed to go to Las Estrellas, next door.

I had my doubts, and funds were running low. I indicated they I was short on money by just pulling out all my money and showing him. It was a $10 bill and about 400 pesos in assorted denominations. He took one look and said yes, that was plenty. So, off we went.

We got a table in the back. I got to sit next to Ms. R. She's about a 6. 5 and probably a 7 if she lost about 10 pounds. Very nice, and not drinking at all because she had to drive later. She loves to dance, and has no problem with the slow, close ones as well as the fast ones. We got along very well. Nice.

We ordered beers. They came. Next thing you know, Pa wants a cubeta. Now I've already had 6 or 7 beers, tequila and mescal. I really don't think this is a good idea. But who am I to argue? It's loud, I can't understand a word he's saying. I know he wants some money. I pull out my stash and he takes $10 and hands it to the waiter. Waiter takes off, then comes back. He speaks to Ma, who digs in her wallet and hands the waiter some more (no idea how much). Waiter buzzes off and returns with a big-ass bucket full of 10 full-size Tecates. OMG.

I take one, Pa takes one. Ma apparently doesn't like Tecate, and orders something lighter. Ms. R isn't drinking. Man, my work is cut out for me. I really don't think I can keep up my half of the deal.

As the night wears on, we drink. We dance our asses off. I dance with Ms. R. I dance with Ma. I dance with some chick who caught my eye during a particularly peppy number. Pa is getting more and more shitfaced. I pretend to take long pulls at my beer, but only sip. If I do all 5 beers, I'm going to puke. Been there, done that, and don't want to do it again.

Eventually, the crowd begins to thin. The lights start to come up ever so slightly. I figure it's getting close to closing time. I know I've hit the wall. I can't dance another dance, or drink another beer. I made sure I had Ms. R's number handy, I kissed Ma, I kissed Ms. R. Pa had fallen asleep and couldn't be roused, so I just waved at him. I made my way through the groups of people and hit the door.

Once outside, I looked at my watch. OMG! Holy Shit! It's 6:00 am in the fucking morning. I haven't done this in ages. Suddenly I'm starving. I staggered up to the hot dog cart on the corner and wolfed down two. Then to Oxxo to get some water and something sweet to help metabolize the alcohol. Then to the taco stand outside Ticuan because 2 hotdogs weren't enough.

I made it to bed just after.[/QUOTE]

Parking: Behind Jack-in-Box $7 for 8 hrs, UTEA $10 per 24 hrs & $7 for 24 hours startingat10:00 am Flee Market location opposite UTEA.

Any other choices that I missed?

Block Diagram not to scale. BP. Jpg.

[QUOTE=Tomjackin; 1344752]Because the new border entry is now open on the same side, the owner wants to cash in and now it is $7 for 8 hours. I'm not a cheap person, but out of principle I will boycott the lot in the future.

Just my 2 pesos.[/QUOTE]

I know I already whined about the price increase in my favorite parking lot, but I'm not done. First off, I really like the staff there, I know them and vice versa. I know the duty free lot is 10 bucks a for 24 hours, but even if I'm in Tijuana for 2+ days, I used my favorite lot. Because I trust the dudes who work there. But the owner decided to jack the price from 5 bucks to 7 bucks for 8 hours, even though he was already getting a lot more business in the first place. And the employees are not happy about the price increase either. OK, enough whining for now; I'll get over it soon.

HK is always the home base and attached are some pictures of the last couple of trips. I've notice somewhat of a crew change out in the place, but there are always the regulars that I love to chat with and touch for a silly buck.

Sentri holders beware; there is no free pass. I walked to the agent at about 10 in the evening and he told me that I had a random inspection. I asked why, and he said it was just random. So I sat in some chairs with a few others and I was getting fucking pissed! I'm sure there was steam coming off my head as I waited there for 20+ minutes! I was the last one they called up and at this point I wanted to take a swing at anybody; but I didn't.

Before the agent opened his mouth, I asked my question. I asked,"If I am a trusted traveler in the Sentri and Global Entry programs, why would you detain me for a random inspection?" And I asked this as calmly as possible. I was told that many in the Sentri program still try to smuggle drugs though and have felonies after they get the card; thus the random checks. I was still a bit pissed, but they did explain the reasoning well.

[QUOTE=Tomjackin;1344872]I asked,"If I am a trusted traveler in the Sentri and Global Entry programs, why would you detain me for a random inspection?"[/QUOTE]Hell, it's because you look REALLY shifty! :D

Random Inspection Leading to Revocation Procedure of SENTRI: Global or Nexus Pass including confisication at the spot can happen (revocation) after a random inspection.

It is true that some veteran and rooky agents have a problem with the "Quick Entry" program SENTRI, GLobal and Nexus and members are selected for random inspection to say the least. I do not see a fix to the situation but expect to get worst after November 6 regardless as who is elected.

The twenty minutes in your case with CBP or ICE interview is a life time experience not really needed.

Being at ones best and know what one can bring is all one can do. Be safe.

Welcome to USA.

[QUOTE=Tomjackin; 1344872]Sentri holders beware; there is no free pass. I walked to the agent at about 10 in the evening and he told me that I had a random inspection. I asked why, and he said it was just random. So I sat in some chairs with a few others and I was getting fucking pissed! I'm sure there was steam coming off my head as I waited there for 20+ minutes! I was the last one they called up and at this point I wanted to take a swing at anybody; but I didn't.

Before the agent opened his mouth, I asked my question. I asked,"If I am a trusted traveler in the Sentri and Global Entry programs, why would you detain me for a random inspection?" And I asked this as calmly as possible. I was told that many in the Sentri program still try to smuggle drugs though and have felonies after they get the card; thus the random checks. I was still a bit pissed, but they did explain the reasoning well.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Tomjackin;1343802]Dude! I miss that stupid new overpass every damn weekend! The new entree is a cluster fuck to say the least.[/QUOTE]Ain't that the truth! Damn tired of the change already.

When I was a kid I thought we'd all have jet-packs by now, how convenient would it be to launch from the parking lot of the Duty Free and flyover to the zona.

Forgot to add this story link about the border crossing to my previous post, just an FYI:

[url]http://www.utsandiego.com/news/2012/nov/04/improvements-promised-pedestrians-san-ysidro-borde/[/url]

[QUOTE=Tomjackin;1344872]Before the agent opened his mouth, I asked my question. I asked,"If I am a trusted traveler in the Sentri and Global Entry programs, why would you detain me for a random inspection?" And I asked this as calmly as possible. I was told that many in the Sentri program still try to smuggle drugs though and have felonies after they get the card; thus the random checks. I was still a bit pissed, but they did explain the reasoning well.[/QUOTE]If the border agency is aware of sentri / ge members having felonies after they get the card, the sentri / ge card gets revoked by GOES. What they are looking for are UNDECLARED agricultural items or commercial quantities of an item. If you get caught, the fines I have read about the fines / penalties start at a couple hundred dollars to thousands PLUS anywhere from one warning* on your GOES account to immediate revocation of your Sentri.

"Paul Morris, director of field operations for San Diego, reminds those with a SENTRI pass that they they are not exempt from USA laws requiring them to declare everything.

Failure to declare all items such as fruits and vegetables, merchandise and souvenirs places a SENTRI participant as risk of being fine or arrested, and removed immediately from trusted traveler programs, ' he says."

*2 warnings on your account has you ineligible to renew. Something as simple as entering the Sentri lane without your Sentri card physically on you, can generate a warning.

[QUOTE=Phordphan;1344930]Hell, it's because you look REALLY shifty! :D[/QUOTE]For some odd reason, I resemble that remark!:(

around july i decided to go to tijuana in the near future. why tijuana? well after reading the posts here i narrowed my excursion to rio de janeiro brazil, sosua dominican republic, san jose costa rica or tijuana mexico. now i have mongered the usa, canada and europe for many many years and thought i would taste the treats south of the boarder. i am a cheap bastard so i was looking for as much banging for the buck as possible and intended to use my frequent flyer miles to get me somewhere. the best deal i could get was to san diego so that was my plan (however i ended up going to la) so tijuana here i cum!

sentri.

after reading the nightmare stories here about the long lines crossing the border back to the usa (all very true as i will later attest) i applied for a sentri card. i am a standup tax paying american and i think i had 1 speeding ticket my entire life so i thought why not for $25 bucks and avoid those 4 hour lines (its more like $125 by the way).

the end of july i applied. because of an alignment of venus and her anus or some other celestial reason the circumstance happened that i would be in la at the end of october. prefect! come september i didn't hear back from sentri and started calling to see if i could speed up the process. the government officials i spoke with told me very politely to shut up and wait like everyone else. come early october i finally get my application approved! yes! but they now say i have to go for a face to face interview with a customs officer to get my card and that i must make an appointment at a few select offices. the only one near tijuana was ½ hour away and only had appointments in december. uggg, i just pissed away $25. then i thought, knowing i would have time during the day on november 1, that i would cross back into the usa and travel to the office, plead my case and see if someone was a 'no show' and i could use their spot to conduct my interview, get my card and when i had to cross back on saturday and drive back to la to catch my flight, i could do so easily.

that seemed like a good plan. at the time. more on that later.

research.

i basically cut and paste every trip report and every post for the last two years from this site in to a word document and read everything carefully using a highlighter and making notes. this site is ridicules in its value and even though a really am a cheap prick and don't have a membership i felt that i must return the tremendously valuable contributions made by others by posting this lengthy and detailed report.

the bottom line of my research was that hong kong would be home base and all activities would center around there. i reserved a room their hotel, cascada. not that the reservation meant anything. they replied with an email that said 'yea, sure we gotcha covered' but i think if i showed up and the rooms where full they would just say sorry bud, try across the street. nevertheless, i was checking in on a wednesday and there were very few mongers staying on the 6 th floor as far as i could tell, so getting the room was no hassle. i will say it's a cash deal, so plan for it. $40 a night, and friday night they raise it to $50.

i also knew i would explore the streets and as well as adelita and tropical. i did make it to adelita but really all you could ever hope and dream for can be found at hong kong.

pre trip.

i have always had the habit of picking up a little something before visiting a provider, a little body lotion or something at bath and body. they give you those nice little bags and when you greet your gal with that in your hand it's a great way to let them know you're thinking of them. it takes the sessions to a whole new level of gfe in most cases.

so i went to the dollar store and stocked up on $1 eye shadow, $1 lipstick and $1 tooth brushed (remember i am a cheap prick and its only the thought that counts). i also went to harry and david's and bought a bag of milk chocolate truffles individually wrapped. when i brought a girl in to my room these items were laid out and i asked them if they would like one. every chica was thrillled. they had a great time picking through them to find the right one. after we got undressed and before the session we each had a truffle, some would rub them on their tits and i sucked them off, it was a lot of fun and a great way to break the ice as these sessions can be quite 'mechanical' and i was looking for more. and got it.

i also got a set of cds to learn to speak spanish. i am sorry that i didn't get too far with the cds and i will certainly learn more spanish before i go back (not 'if' i go back. 'when' i go back). you don't 'need' to know spanish but is sure does help because having a dialogue with a chica before you decide to session with her really helps establish a rapport and makes for a better session. that being said the music is so loud that that fucking dj never shuts up that its hard to have a conversation in any language especially if led zeppelin fucked up your hearing 20 years.

I had hoped to leave LA early afternoon and be at the border before dark meeting up with fellow monger Smoky Jack (also a Tijuana virgin) by 7ish. Well I didn't leave LA until 4:00 and was stuck in traffic for hours. Eventually I made it to the border and found the parking lot behind the Jack in the Box. I realized it was $5 for 8 hours, I thought it was $5 a day. As I later found its still the best deal around. It goes to $7 per 8 hours on Friday.

Now I have crossed other borders at least 100 fucking times and read all the detail on this site about this boarder but nothing prepared me for this. My expectation was that when you arrive at a boarder, one that has been established for a zillion years, there is a big fucking sign that says 'MEXICO' or 'USA' or whatever country you are entering. You then have well organized path and lines that go through customs to the next country. Nope. Not here. After I parked the car, pulling my luggage, I looked around for a big sign that said 'MEXICO THIS WAY YOU FUCKING IDIOT'. No such sign exists. I eventually figured out by watching people stream behind some buildings that the way to Mexico was some path behind some stores in a back alley marked by some little signs that said 'new pedestrian crossing to Mexico'. Well if you didn't know about the old pedestrian crossing how the fuck could you know about the new one.

Once though the turnstile you then proceed down some stairs then down some more stairs (and don't forget to press the button when the customs offer says to) then up a ramp then over a bridge then down a ramp before you get even close to getting a cab. I was hot, tired, exhausted and pissed off but all this would soon be forgotten. I grabbed a yellow cab and said 'Cascada next to Hong Kong, $5, por favor' The driver said how about a tip? I said that it was included in the $5. He didn't say another word and took me directly to the door.

I arrived about 9pm on Halloween night. Checked in, went to the room and showered. I have stayed at some 5 star hotels in my day and let me tell you, this aint one of them. Not even close. I put it a notch below Motel 8. This is a 'fuck' motel and all you can expect from this hotel is a place to fuck. The only reason to stay here is that the Hong Kong is affiliated and any girl working the Hong Kong goes to this hotel. The room was fairly clean, small, two towels, sheets and a bed spread that I wouldn't want to fuck on much less sleep on and a TV with 4 channels of porn, Ultimate Fighting (in English) and a music channel.

It is safe and your stuff is reasonably safe in the room, however I kept all important belongings with me at all times, cash, wallet, passport etc.

I entered the Hong Kong about 9:30, 10:00 and couldn't believe the place. It was packed and rocking. There were incredibly hot chicas all over the place! All dressed like walking sex in Halloween costumes. I knew I had to session quickly because I have been anticipating this trip since July so the first pop was important to get though so that I could better focus on a strategic plan. I find the ladies locker room area where I normally position myself in strip clubs (Jack, I later find that there are two locker rooms) get a $5 beer ($4 + $1 tip) and take in the sights.

Not long after a hot chica in a wedding dress costume walks past me grabs my cock and says 'I want to fuck you'. I said 'well I want to fuck you too' and she walks away. What the fuck? This chick had huge tits, a tight ass, long blond hair. 6' fuckme pumps and a skirt that stopped ¼ inch from her pussy. She said she wants to fuck me and walks away. Well I'm chasing after that shit! I catch up to her and said lets go fuck. She says lets go. I said how much? She says $70, I say $60 she's say OK, and that's all there was to it. Up to my room, she picks out some makeup, we have some truffles and fuck like bunnies. I walk her back to the bar and we keep running into each other all night. She keeps saying lets fuck again but I was now ready to 'target' a chica now the first pop is out of the way (although she was a great piece of ass and would gladly have fucked her again).

I then find a chica in a police uniform and ask her if she would like a drink. She is young, early 20's rock hard natural body, long jet black hair and absolutely gorgeous face, speaks only a little English but loves to play. We grab a booth in the back so I could try to have a conversation with her. She orders a drink $8 + $1 tip, and while she is drinking she is rubbing my cock and I am rubbing her pussy and playing with her tits. She points up meaning lets go upstairs, I say how much? She say $70, I say $60, she's says ok and off we go. Now this time I take my time and we relax and I play a while allowing me to bring her to an O with DATY and finger play. We had an incredible session. I pretended that she hand cuffed me to the bed and she held my hands down and cowgirled me to a pop. We snuggled and fell asleep for a bit then woke up and went at it again. She runs to keep in shape and let me tell you she had one tight hard body, I whaled that shit doggie slapping that tight ass and we had the time of our lives. I really get off when my girl has fun too and she was loving it (or is a hellofan actress). She asked to meet me the next day but we never ran in to each other. When I saw her I was already committed to another or she was sitting with someone else, I hoped it was Jack.