General Reports

I'm not a fichia buying kind of guy. But some how I ended up in the tv room at La Gloria with 2 girls buying double fichia's. It didn't take long and they had my deek out and they were both going to work on it. It brought back memories of the old days in the Unicorn club on revo. Anyways it got kind of funny when they started having a conversation with each other and I kept hearing the word limp. I interupted WTF are you saying my deek es limp no duro (hard) After a lttle confusion one girl pulls out her translater and shows me limpia means clean. Just sharing a funny Tijuana moment.

First off, on Friday afternoon, the border parking behind jack-off-in-a-box was almost full at 4 pm; something was happening in Tijuana for sure. Going through the immigration building was simple, until I got to the push the green / red light button. All the locals with bags had to press the button. But, I was directed straight to the x-ray machine. I stopped and asked if I could push the button, but the agent said no. I told the agent everyone else pushed the button, why not me? I'm sure it had something to do with me being a Gringo and the others were not. I told the agent, "No es justo" and put my bag in the damn machine.

Because the Ticuan was sold out, I booked the Hotel Real de Rio. I used the hotel a couple of times while the Ticuan was closed. The desk clerk was a real dick and he asked if I was staying alone. I told him I had a guest with me and he insisted that I write down her first and last name on the registration paper. Perhaps another Gringo issue? I had a date with a couple of girls later that evening, so I had some time to kill. I grabbed a cab and headed to HK. The best part of the night was having the best street taco this side of the Mississippi. At around 4:30, HK was already packed. I grabbed a booth and enjoyed the view for a couple of hours.

I headed back to the hotel and tried to use the WiFi on the 4th floor; didn't work. I took my pad down to the bar, the WiFi sucked there as well. The girls showed up separately and each time I went out to pay for the taxi. The three of us settled in at the bar and had a couple of drinks. Things were going great until we left to go to the room. The desk clerk dick stopped me and ask to see the ID of the girl I wrote down. He continued on and said that both of the girls could not go to the room, only one, and the one I listed on the registration. I told him they were not staying the night, but that didn't make a difference. I was pissed and I went to the room to drop off my pad. When I returned to the lobby, two security monkeys suddenly appeared.

I promised the girls dinner after the hotel, so I cut my losses, and we headed to LOS Arcos. One of the girls ordered the mango shrimp and the other ordered the Puerto Rican shrimp. I ordered the stuffed crab off the English menu. My dish didn't taste anything like stuffed crab. The girls tasted my food and both said it was fish. They seemed to enjoy my food, so they ate most of my so called stuffed crab. I asked to speak to the manager, but instead I had 5 meseros come to my table. One of the smarter meseros figured out I got the stuffed fish. They all seemed amused with the mixed up order; I wasn't amused whatsoever.

One of the girls called her taxi and they dropped me off at the hotel. I could not stand another moment in that hotel or Tijuana as well. Went to the room, grabbed my stuff, and got in a cab and headed to the border. The taxi driver said it was Friday night and I should stay and party. Nice thought, but I was too pissed to party anymore.

I normally don't have a bad night in Tijuana; I guess I was just overdue for one.

[QUOTE=Tomjackin;1855043]First off, on Friday afternoon, the border parking behind jack-off-in-a-box was almost full at 4 pm; something was happening in Tijuana for sure. Going through the immigration building was simple, until I got to the push the green / red light button. All the locals with bags had to press the button. But, I was directed straight to the x-ray machine. I stopped and asked if I could push the button, but the agent said no. I told the agent everyone else pushed the button, why not me? I'm sure it had something to do with me being a Gringo and the others were not. I told the agent, "No es justo" and put my bag in the damn machine.

Because the Ticuan was sold out, I booked the Hotel Real de Rio. I used the hotel a couple of times while the Ticuan was closed. The desk clerk was a real dick and he asked if I was staying alone. I told him I had a guest with me and he insisted that I write down her first and last name on the registration paper. Perhaps another Gringo issue? I had a date with a couple of girls later that evening, so I had some time to kill. I grabbed a cab and headed to HK. The best part of the night was having the best street taco this side of the Mississippi. At around 4:30, HK was already packed. I grabbed a booth and enjoyed the view for a couple of hours...[/QUOTE]Sorry about your bad experience Tom. Were these two girls escorts? Is it correct to assume that you paid the girls, since the unaccommodating accommodations were your call?

Did you consider taking them to a love motel once the desk clerk gave you shit? I think La Maison and another love motel are pretty close to Hotel Real de Rio.

[QUOTE=ScatManDoo;1855063]Sorry about your bad experience Tom. Were these two girls escorts? Is it correct to assume that you paid the girls, since the unaccommodating accommodations were your call?

Did you consider taking them to a love motel once the desk clerk gave you shit? I think La Maison and another love motel are pretty close to Hotel Real de Rio.[/QUOTE]No, they were bar girls before thier shift. Because I used the hotel before without any issues, I thought nothing would be an issue.

I never used a love hotel inTijuana, so I was at a lost there as well. Thank you for the idea!

[QUOTE=Tomjackin;1855090]No, they were bar girls before thier shift. Because I used the hotel before without any issues, I thought nothing would be an issue.

I never used a love hotel inTijuana, so I was at a lost there as well. Thank you for the idea![/QUOTE]Who were the girls tom?? Top tier Spinners?

[QUOTE=ClamSlammer;1854421]Don't understand why you would come on here and ask vets for advice and then say you plan to ignore the advice you're given even though you acknowledge the advice is correct. And then ask again the same question in which you were already given a very clear answer.[/QUOTE]Not quite sure why you posted the above. I may have overlooked it but I don't remember a reply of the cost of a SIM card if purchased in Tijuana compared to buying online. If the cost is insignificant I may go the Amazon route. Only replies I remember was the price at Amazon is a rip off. Can't remember an X $ amount for a card purchased locally.

Terrific story. Both hilarious and on-point at the same time.

[QUOTE=Tomjackin;1850891]Completely agree! Fuck the dinner; that move is for rookies and losers trying to make a hooker a girlfriend! Tip, tip, and tip more; they love the dinero![/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=BaxterSlade;1854517]I'm not a fichia buying kind of guy. But some how I ended up in the tv room at La Gloria with 2 girls buying double fichia's. It didn't take long and they had my deek out and they were both going to work on it. It brought back memories of the old days in the Unicorn club on revo. Anyways it got kind of funny when they started having a conversation with each other and I kept hearing the word limp. I interupted WTF are you saying my deek es limp no duro (hard) After a lttle confusion one girl pulls out her translater and shows me limpia means clean. Just sharing a funny Tijuana moment.[/QUOTE]

As you can see by my post count I'm new to the forum. Great info here and I've read a lot of it. I'll be going to Tijuana for the first time Mon / Tues. While I kind of know what to expect, I wanted to see if anyone wanted to meet up for a beer on me to just kind of get me comfortable with the surroundings. I'm guessing I'll going to get dropped off at Hong Kong as the first stop. Apologies if this is the wrong thread for posting this.

So today was my first time crossing since August I had not seen the new border crossing. They have to lines one for Mexicans and one for foreigners. Since I went into the foreigner line along with my buddy and he had to fill out s form. I however did not bring a passport since I've never needed one to get in. Long story short they sent me to talk to one of the supervisors on the side. He said I needed a passport or passport card. I only brought my sentri card. He said that is only good for going back in and he just kind of ignored me thereafter. I noticed the Mexican nationals just walk through so when my buddy got his paperwork I just walked with him and got by fine when the guy wasn't looking. I was born in Mexico.

Anyhow, my question is. What do you normally do? Do you bring your passport? Or passport card? Or or do you just walk in the other line? Ever get hassled? Not used to this.

[QUOTE=PartyGod;1855903]So today was my first time crossing since August I had not seen the new border crossing. They have to lines one for Mexicans and one for foreigners. Since I went into the foreigner line along with my buddy and he had to fill out s form. I however did not bring a passport since I've never needed one to get in. Long story short they sent me to talk to one of the supervisors on the side. He said I needed a passport or passport card. I only brought my sentri card. He said that is only good for going back in and he just kind of ignored me thereafter. I noticed the Mexican nationals just walk through so when my buddy got his paperwork I just walked with him and got by fine when the guy wasn't looking. I was born in Mexico.

Anyhow, my question is. What do you normally do? Do you bring your passport? Or passport card? Or or do you just walk in the other line? Ever get hassled? Not used to this.[/QUOTE]If you look like a Mexican and can speak good Spanish you probably can get away just walking through the Mexican line and not getting hassled. . Otherwise its best to have a passport.

[QUOTE=TJ2015;1855905]If you look like a Mexican and can speak good Spanish you probably can get away just walking through the Mexican line and not getting hassled. . Otherwise its best to have a passport.[/QUOTE]I'd carry a passport just in case the Zona cops use it as an excuse to have a private talk with you and your wallet.

[QUOTE=PartyGod;1855903]So today was my first time crossing since August I had not seen the new border crossing. They have to lines one for Mexicans and one for foreigners. Since I went into the foreigner line along with my buddy and he had to fill out s form. I however did not bring a passport since I've never needed one to get in. Long story short they sent me to talk to one of the supervisors on the side. He said I needed a passport or passport card. I only brought my sentri card. He said that is only good for going back in and he just kind of ignored me thereafter. I noticed the Mexican nationals just walk through so when my buddy got his paperwork I just walked with him and got by fine when the guy wasn't looking. I was born in Mexico.

Anyhow, my question is. What do you normally do? Do you bring your passport? Or passport card? Or or do you just walk in the other line? Ever get hassled? Not used to this.[/QUOTE]Always bring your passport card AND your SENTRI. As you found out, SENTRI is NOT valid ID for anywhere except reentering the USA from Mexico. If you ever get jacked up, not having valid ID is just another excuse for Tijuana's Finest to fuck with you.

HugotheMan and I made a recent trip (24 hours thereabouts) down to Tijuana. Left Vegas at 6:00 am, picked Hugo up around 9:30 am as we made our run for the border. We arrived at about 11:00 am and parked at our usual place for $6 a day. We grabbed a bit of lunch in San Ysidro, then grabbed our bags, and got some cambio. The rate was around 16.8 for a dollar. Hugo was approached by a San Ysidro local selling him items, and Hugo was kind enough to asked if she was selling earrings. Still, no purchase was made. The border crossing was made with ease and as we made our way to the Taxi line, Hugo and I were immediately met by some drivers offering to take us to the "ligna" for the tremendous rate of $10. We marched on and found a Taxi to take us for (thanks to Hugo) the bargained rate of $4. The driver took us into town, but never said a word. He was likely sour about the price we agreed upon. We passed "Happy Teeth" which gave Hugo and I a thrill as well as a backup if needed (inside thing). Hugo also reminded the driver of the time I "walked" the Tijuana freeway about 4 trips prior. The driver was emotionless. After checking in for the $50 rate at Cascadas and getting our remote for the TV and the A / see controller and safe keys, we made our way to the 5th floor. Hugo forgot his room number immediately thereafter. To Caliente we went as we crossed the street. Wendy smiled. Our Sweet 16 wagers were made for the 4 pm and 6 pm games and we soon left after I got my horse racing losings back on the #4 dog at Caliente in the 3rd race at 4/1. We entered some tiny bar and Terry and I had a good laugh at my attire. My "sweats" per se. Terry said that they were ideal for lap dances. I still worried a tad about my appearance. Ahem*. Terry then played the "I bet you I can guess your exact birthdate" game with the waitress who later told us it would cost $150 to take her out of the bar and to Cascadas. So, we drank a few (I had 2 Tecates), laughed a little, Hugo requested th DJ to play "Compania" and we moved on. Hugo then said he would meet me at Las Chavelas as I went to the room, grabbed a shower and changed clothes. But, not before Hugo sampled a few colognes in order to play the two-wrist game. At Las Chavelas, Hugo might remember my entertaining our female company with a bit of "slapping" at the bar. Everyone was entertained. Good times. Then we began the hunt for the proper Direct TV channel at a $1 beer bar with horrific looking women. Hugo enjoys this spot. He feels genuine there and likes the beer prices. As Hugo was given the remote after the bartender tried to find the NCAA game for 10 minutes unsuccesfully, Hugo finally found the game on channel 112. We watched A&M get destroyed to Oklahoma, but we cashed tickets on the Villanova game "Over" in the first half. Hugo then found a female in the bar with an ass the size of the TV we were watching. And Hugo danced with her. Pretty face and a nice smile, but that was about the extent of it. At the end of both games, and after spending a total of $2 in the joint on "Sol" beers, we left the bar as the sun was beginning to set around 6 pm. To follow would be my viewing of the librarian on the side street who I had taken notice of (and shared a few moments with on a prior trip) wearing a sexy blue outfit with black heels. As we returned at 6 pm the same direction, she had changed clothes into white jeans and an orange top. I asked her the price and she quote "double" what I had paid on a prior trip. Hugo and I discussed why the rates had climbed so much. Was it a Good Friday weekend thing? Were the girls getting wiser to the peso / dollar conversion rate? To follow were the following sights: The guy with the ears on his head in the mini-mart, the Hell's Angels in La Calle, and a trip to the balconia to discuss the plan for the evening. To add, at this point, we had still not seen the "piscinas" in front of the bars that Hugo referrred to for Spring Break promotional purposes. We learned that it was a Saturday thing. As nightfall came, we left the balconia at Cascadas, descended to street level again and walked around the block. We saw how the "Tropical" bar had renovated and we were quite impressed. I also liked the interior of the "New York Bar", but it was dead inside as the manager said it did not really "open" until 8 pm. So, with my free drink coupon (something I never use) and 1/2 off lap dances at the HK club, Hugo and I decided to venture on in around 7:30 pm. Beautiful women were all around, but there were many males there as well. About and even ratio. Sitting was at a premium as we walked around and scanned the joint. We landed at a table next to the stage and asked If the 6:45 games were on any channel as soccer and WWF was showing on all channels in the club. We finally got a remote which I proceeded to drop and the batteries flew everywhere. A pair of beautiful girls approached us to help find the batteries, and we were fortunate to find both. However, the cover remained lost, but the girls said that the mesero was lying and the cover was never on the remote. Intriguing really. Nonetheless, We drank a couple of cervezas and offered a couple to the girls. They were quite beautiful as mine said she was from Mexico City originally. Soon, we found ourselves being led by the girls hand in hand to the VIP area as we paid the mesero for our lapdances ($11 each with the discount). The room had glass doors, and the room was quite dark. We each sat down on a comfy seat / couch and the girls began to strip right in front of us while dancing. Hugo and I looked at each other wondering what was to follow. What was to follow was full-on sex in the Private room. We couldn't believe what was happening and how fast it was happening. The room remined steamy and the girls were extremely excited as we could barely hear the sounds of the club outside the room. What were we supposed to tip? Lots of things were runnning through our minds. Once we completed the act, there was a knock on the door (remind everyone of something) and the girls told him to go away for a few minutes. The girls put their clothes back on and we all laughed a bit. The girls then asked for $50 which turned into $60 somehow, along with $3 for the mesero / room attendant. So, with fichas, lapdance price and the VIP experience, we were out around $100 for the hour or 1. 5 hours in the HK club. To some this was probably a "hustle" in a clip joint. And that is true. But for the first time experience in the HK, we felt that is was, well. Probably worth it The night moved on and we went to eat at Azul next to Cascadas. Hugo had the Ribeye steak and a baked potato. I ordered some rice and a caesar salad. The food took 40 minutes to arrive. Rice? A salad? Hugo said that his steak was what took the time, but the mesero apologized and said the his cooks didn't show up for work, so nobody was there to make the rice. So, my question was, "Then who made the steak?" Ridiculous really. And the food was horrific (A Caesar salad made with avocados and a dressing that tasted like Ranch. The service was even worse. Would absolutely never return. We moved over to Adelitas for a bit and then back to the Tropical Bar where we found that there was an excellent "girl to guy" ratio. Remember the referee girl Hugo? Oh they were plenty in there. Hugo spent some time with one female in a flower dress (breaking out of it really). I found a couple of gems myself, but the girls kept moving around the bar, so it was difficult to settle on the right one. We stayed for 2 hours or so until around Midnight. Or 1 am. Two girls approached us and began to order fichas lleft and right as they kissed all over us and asked for $70 to go to their rooms upstairs, or $100 to go to Cascadas. We thought about it, but Hugo asked why the price was so high and felt that the amount we spent on fichas should be applied to the overall rate. That deal didn't exactly pan out. So, I gave Hugo the look, excused myself to the restroom and proceeded to leave the bar without the girls noticing. I texted Hugo, and we met about 30 minutes later at another location. La Gloria bar perhaps. Hugo remained in there a bit as I walked around a bit looking for a "nightcap" on the street per se. I found a girl on a side street with a black and white outfit, and we went inside the Riviera Hotel. Dumpy little joint. We agreed on 250 pesos, but it made its way up to 400 pesos after the session was complete. Fully satisfied, I left the area, and headed back to find Hugo at La Gloria bar. At this point it was around 3:30 AM and I decided to crash back at the hotel for the night. I mentioned to Hugo that we could head to the Ligna and not risk the long line the next day. Hugo decided to go find another girl and that we should just sleep, check out around noon the next day and leave. Getting rest was the right idea, but taking that risk for the "ligna" felt, well. Like the wrong move. As I set set my alarm for the next morning for 10:45, we met at Caliente after checking out at 11:15 am (Hugo lost his pager. Yes. A pager). We then got into the taxi only to make our way to a ligna that was reportedly a 1 hour wait. It took 2 hours and 15 minutes as we finally made it to the front. Lesson learned: I will never, never leave Tijuana again unless it is between Midnight and 3 am. That is a guarantee. We met two ladies in line who said they just had some great tacos during their visit. We let them in front of us. We also told them that our purpose for the trip was the tacos. They laughed. We then made our way to the front of the line and in the last 5 minutes, a girl (Tijuana local, but American) began to chat with us about her life in Tijuana married to a Mexican man. She was on her way to a "perfume" counter interview as I told her she looked like a "flapper" from the 1920's. Hugo laughed. And I proceeded to inquire with her "why" women were turned on by men. Because we see men as being just "horrible looking and unappealing in all facets". She loved it. Ate it up and agreed that she finds women much more attractive. We agreed. Headed to the car after I changed my $3,500 pesos for $204 and we hit the 805 North. Trip over. A good time with good company. Hope you all enjoyed the report!

Thank you for the excellent report Caprese.

[QUOTE=Caprese7;1856759]So, with my free drink coupon (something I never use) and 1/2 off lap dances at the HK club, Hugo and I decided to venture on in around 7:30 pm. Beautiful women were all around, but there were many males there as well. About and even ratio. Sitting was at a premium as we walked around and scanned the joint. We landed at a table next to the stage and asked If the 6:45 games were on any channel as soccer and WWF was showing on all channels in the club. We finally got a remote which I proceeded to drop and the batteries flew everywhere. A pair of beautiful girls approached us to help find the batteries, and we were fortunate to find both. However, the cover remained lost, but the girls said that the mesero was lying and the cover was never on the remote. Intriguing really. Nonetheless, We drank a couple of cervezas and offered a couple to the girls. They were quite beautiful as mine said she was from Mexico City originally.[/QUOTE]So the girls wouldn't take pesos? You both were loaded up with Mexican money!

Seemed like the perfect time to tell them you only had pesos and offer just 700 or 800 p.

Why not remind them you two were in there on a 2 for 1 promotion? HaHa.

It sounded like the experience was probably worth it!

[QUOTE=Caprese7;1856759]At the end of both games, and after spending a total of $2 in the joint on "Sol" beers, we left the bar as the sun was beginning to set around 6 pm. To follow would be my viewing of the librarian on the side street who I had taken notice of (and shared a few moments with on a prior trip) wearing a sexy blue outfit with black heels. As we returned at 6 pm the same direction, she had changed clothes into white jeans and an orange top. I asked her the price and she quote "double" what I had paid on a prior trip. Hugo and I discussed why the rates had climbed so much. Was it a Good Friday weekend thing?[/QUOTE]I think you missed her early-bird special.

[QUOTE=Caprese7;1856759] (Hugo lost his pager. Yes. A pager).[/QUOTE]I talked to Hugo, and he didn't lose a pager (WTF is a pager) he left it on the night stand and it looks like someone entered his room and stole it. He also said earlier while he was in his room a couple employees with a clipboard knocked on his door. When he opened it they just said never mind and walked away. I have heard stories about employees having easy access to the rooms so I would be real careful about what you leave lying around. I don't even know if I would trust the safes there. Of course the funny part being they stole a pager. I'm sure if they were under 30 years old they probably didn't even know what they were stealing. Just looked like some kind of electronic gismo.

And as far as HK why didn't you fellas just take them to the room for $80 or a bunch of pesos. But as far as strip clubs go full service in the VIP room does sound kind of exciting.

And last but not least thanks Caprese 7 for an entertaining trip report.