Cartagena Reports

[QUOTE=MongerHunger;2934043]Keep in mind that Colombia is the only country in South America that has 2 coast. One coast in the Caribbean Sea and the other coast on the Pacific Ocean. I have not been to the Pacific coast of Colombia yet.[/QUOTE]I have been to beaches that were supposed to be the bee's knees in every country (Colombia, Ecuador, Peru, Chile) along that coast. Hollywood Beach is pretty much better than par for the course, especially the temperature of the water. If you want a nice beach do not go looking on the western side of South America.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;2934184]I have been to beaches that were supposed to be the bee's knees in every country (Colombia, Ecuador, Peru, Chile) along that coast. Hollywood Beach is pretty much better than par for the course, especially the temperature of the water. If you want a nice beach do not go looking on the western side of South America.[/QUOTE]That's interesting because even in the USA On the Pacific coast the water is cold. Even in the middle of the summer time. You don't see many people swimming in the water.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;2933484]One of my cousins checked in a box with alcohol which did not arrive on his flight. It came the next day. After we ate lunch at a normal-priced Colombian restaurant, 3 of us went to the airport to pick up the box. The rest of the guys were supposed to be heading to Hollywood Beach. My cousin learned his lesson that it is better to go to the grocery store on arrival if you want alcohol and stay away from importing it and the duty frees.

We got back and dropped off the box and walked to the beach to meet up with the other guys. Except when we got there, they were still at the place where we just dropped off the box. How their place is set up, they have the entire floor, but there are separate rooms like a hotel. One of the rooms have the kitchen, dining room, and 2 bedrooms. The rest of the rooms are like single hotel-style rooms. So they just leave the one room open so people can use the kitchen or whatever anytime.

So yeah the guys are not at the beach but we tell the waiter at Caliwood Kiosk #4, Peter, that we need a place for 7. The place is noisy as fuck. It is like everyone is blasting their own music under each umbrella. As soon as we sat down the vendors were on us like flies to shit. People kept trying to rent bluetooth speakers to us which explained the noise. Massage ladies would not leave us alone. I kept telling my cousins just say no no matter how much they touch on you.

We ordered drinks. I ordered a pina colada in a glass and one of my cousins ordered a caipirinha. My other cousin wanted his pina colada in the pineapple but I talked him out of that. I told him they were going to hit him over the head for that pineapple and it was going to hold less than the cup. (In Ecuador once my girl wanted hers in the pineapple. I told her what I just told you but she did not believe it. I had the bartender pour the shit from my glass into the pineapple and when it filled up there was still some left in my glass that would not fit.) So you can pay extra to be cute and have less drink or you can pay the normal price and have the correct amount of drink.

When he brought the drinks I told him to bring the bill. He insisted that he would just bring a final bill when it was time to go. I said I was not falling for that and would pay as we go. It took me a out 10 times asking for it for him to finally bring it. Then once we paid, it took us about 10 times asking for him to bring the change.

For those that do not know, the prices on the beach are a tourist ripoff and the government actually regulates the prices. The only way it kind of works out is if you only buy 1 drink. The price for 2 chairs and an umbrella is 20,000 per the government. What the kiosk is doing is telling you that the chairs and umbrellas are free, but including it into the price of other things. So the 55,000 kind of works if you only buy 1 drink (Not really though because the drink would still be overpiced because its price is supposed to be 15,000, so they are still charging you 20,000 extra). But if you buy 2 drinks you have in essence paid for the chairs and umbrella twice. Of course tourists are none the wiser to these things. There was also a 16% service charge added to the bill.

The other guys finally arrived. My cousin told me his thing was getting a manicure and pedicure at the beach. It was 50,000. I said come on man. You are letting a strange chick poke and prod you on a dirty beach with tools that have touched you do not know who or what. Meanwhile I pay 25,000 in a clean ass salon. He could not resist though. Soon all the guys were getting massages or their nails done. One guy told me to ask the chick that was doing another guy's nails about a happy ending. I asked her and she said you have to talk to those hoes about that, because I do not do happy endings. I fell out laughing.

So when the lady finished my cousin's nails the price magically went from 50,000 to 100,000. She said she had to charge him for a half massage too. I fell out laughing saying I told you, I told you. They argued back and forth and when she finally realized he was not going to give her 100,000, she left with the original 50,000.

I told the happy ending lady why'all think we are some damn fools huh? Then I showed her the prices from the government with the number you are supposed to call if someone tries to cheat you. She said you know too damn much. We started laughing. She gave me her menu so I could take pictures of it. You can see that her complete massage is 300,000, while the government says it can be no more than 50,000. You can also see that the govermnent says braids are 30,000 while her menu says 90,000. This is exactly why after my first time to Cartagena years ago I said fuck that ripoff ass place and only returned during the day driving from Barranquilla to go to Baru.

P.S. I am with a girl in Barranquilla and she told me a story of someone eating fish on the beach in Cartagena. In true fashion they said not to worry about the price and in the end tried to charge them 2,000,000 pesos. They had to call the police to straighten it out.[/QUOTE]I remembered my first time there when I saw the receipt pic. But I'm assuming you guys didn't end up paying the receipt amount, right? Unless the chair / umbrella fee is per person, I count umbrella / chair fee + three 15000 COP cocktails. Maybe, I'll check out Hollywood beach again after that expensive first visit since I've got a cruise coming up.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;2934184]I have been to beaches that were supposed to be the bee's knees in every country (Colombia, Ecuador, Peru, Chile) along that coast. Hollywood Beach is pretty much better than par for the course, especially the temperature of the water. If you want a nice beach do not go looking on the western side of South America.[/QUOTE]That's interesting because even in the USA On the Pacific coast the water is cold. Even in the middle of the summer time. You don't see many people swimming in the water.

[QUOTE=MongerHunger;2934304]That's interesting because even in the USA On the Pacific coast the water is cold. Even in the middle of the summer time. You don't see many people swimming in the water.[/QUOTE]As a life-long Californian, whose been to quite a few beaches in the state, yes the water is cold, even in summer. But in the LA area and down south to San Diego its warm in the summer time. From the central coast on up, its too cold to swim all year round.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;2934184]I have been to beaches that were supposed to be the bee's knees in every country (Colombia, Ecuador, Peru, Chile) along that coast. Hollywood Beach is pretty much better than par for the course, especially the temperature of the water. If you want a nice beach do not go looking on the western side of South America.[/QUOTE]Outside of the water being cold in all but the summer months, what is wrong with Mancora in Peru?

[QUOTE=Elvis2008;2934493]Outside of the water being cold in all but the summer months, what is wrong with Mancora in Peru?[/QUOTE]The water is still cold in summer months. I was planning to dive there, but in the end was happy that I did not lug my gear, because there was no way I was getting into that freezing water. And getting there is a big hassle for such a bullshit beach. Nobody that has actually experienced a good beach is going to be happy after going all that way and seeing that. It is good for Peruvians because that is as good as it gets in their country. It is no Cancun, Punta Cana, or even Daytona. Still better off at Hollywood I say. They had some good drinks though. I just sat there and drank and watched videos on my phone while old girl played in that cold water. And besides that, there was nothing going on in that little town.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;2934649]The water is still cold in summer months. I was planning to dive there, but in the end was happy that I did not lug my gear, because there was no way I was getting into that freezing water. And getting there is a big hassle for such a bullshit beach. Nobody that has actually experienced a good beach is going to be happy after going all that way and seeing that. It is good for Peruvians because that is as good as it gets in their country. It is no Cancun, Punta Cana, or even Daytona. Still better off at Hollywood I say. They had some good drinks though. I just sat there and drank and watched videos on my phone while old girl played in that cold water. And besides that, there was nothing going on in that little town.[/QUOTE]Okay, so you are looking at swimming, diving, and night life, and it does suck for those things, and Hollywood is better in those regards. For me, it was a welcome excursion from always foggy Lima. It is like, "Hey, Peru does have some sun after al. ".

Thing is I enjoyed the calm sea, the pelicans flying, the not too hot sand, the beach strolls, and the fish bakes we had on the beach. We bought fish from the fisherman for like 50 cents a pound that was great. Apparently, a Japanese couple bought a tuna earlier and ate the whole damned thing raw right on the pier because they could not believe the could get fresh tuna so cheap.

It is a place to chill versus party for sure. When we went looking to a gym to work out, there was like only one, and it was horrible.

Hollywood Beach is basically a trade show for women to make contact with potential customers. To me it qualifies as one of the greatest shows on earth. [B]All[/B] the ladies were there in bikinis and there were tons of them. What I recommend is to sit facing the kiosk and not the beach. I had to turn around so many times because the chicks were walking behind me. I told my cousin that it would be smarter to sit on the other side of the table and that is what he changed to do.

No idea why people here mention talking to Tony about getting chicks. Tony is just a waiter as far as I could tell. The chicks are there walking around back and forth and all you have to do is call one over.

There is no need for you to sit and drink or eat with chicks. My group just called the chicks over and added them to whatsapp for later. I called them over and asked how much. They would always say 100. I would respond 100 pesos? They would say $100. After that I say we are in Colombia; who the hell has dollars? Then they would say 400,000 pesos. When I did it with one chick her $100 turned to 200,000 pesos. These chicks were quoting these prices for 1 hour. One chick asked $120 but when asked about pesos she said 400,000. My boys would do everything on whatsapp and google translate. One of the chicks told them 300,000.

There was so much shit going on at Hollywood that it seems the massage ladies are there because you get so tense from beating off all the touts. There was even a guy getting a haircut on the beach!

One dumb ass chick walked by screaming respect me. I am not a prepago. I am a Dominican lawyer on vacation. I told one of those waiters to flag her down because I was busy on my phone. When she came up I was still busy and did not even look up so she eventually walked away.

I was about to order another drink when my cousin stopped me. He said they were about to close. The police were coming around telling everyone to leave. They do this at all public Colombian beaches at 6 pm. I have been to private beaches where this does not happen.

We got up and started to walk up toward the street. All the girls were there putting their street clothes over their bikinis. I went and talk to the chick who earlier claimed to be Dominican. We exchanged whatsapps. Apparently she is a Venezuelan parading as a Dominican lawyer on vacation. I asked her where she was from and she said Santo Domingo. I said what part. She was stuck. Then she proceeded to talk about how she is on vacation and does not want to talk about any of that. She also said she left the Dominican Republic 20 years ago and did not know anything. The next day when the Venezuelan election took place she had put stuff on her whatsapp concerning the election.

We got a couple more numbers then went back to our rooms. I was not expecting to use any of the contacts because my girl was already on the way over. We did our thing then went out to eat and she went home about 9 pm. The fellas called me to meet up at the same restaurant that I had just left. I got there and 4 of the 6 guys had one of the chicks that were at the beach earlier. They had planned to keep them all night. No idea how much they were paying.

Whenever we go to restaurants they have this thing of wanting to sit inside with the air conditioning. Well the problem with this place was that the inside was hotter than outside. I kept telling them it was hot as fuck and why not move outside. I went and got one of those chairs from the bar and sat directly under the half working AC.

One of the guys got up like he was going to the bathroom, turned around, bent over, and paused. He was fucking losing it. We had to grab him and get him back seated, and treat him for heat stroke. I told them it was hot as fuck in that room. I called Indriver to bring him back to their place where there was definitely cold AC. The girl he had came with me to help nurse him. The rest of the people came later.

We had plans to check out Androgeno, but because of that incident the plans fell though and everyone decided to stay inside. The ones that already had chicks with their chicks. I was happy because I was already sleepy as fuck.

The chicks were hitting me up after I left asking if I was still there.

[QUOTE=Elvis2008;2934493]Outside of the water being cold in all but the summer months, what is wrong with Mancora in Peru?[/QUOTE]You can use Sea Temperature feature in [URL]windy.com[/URL].

Mancora is now 24 degrees Celsius or 4 degrees below pool temperature.

[URL]https://www.windy.com/-Menu/menu?sst[/URL], -4. 724,-81.059,8.

[QUOTE=Questner;2934732]You can use Sea Temperature feature in [URL]windy.com[/URL].

Mancora is now 24 degrees Celsius or 4 degrees below pool temperature.

[URL]https://www.windy.com/-Menu/menu?sst[/URL], -4. 724,-81.059,8.[/QUOTE]The highest / warmest summer time Pacific water temperature in LOS Angeles during is only 66°F and San Diego at 67°F. Not too pleasant for swimming in my opinion. The Caribbean average all year round water temperature is 80°F. Perfect!

Long time reader, first time reporter.

Thought I'the start giving back to the forum since I've been able to gather so much info by just RTFF. I've Been to a lot of LATAM, and I'm Latino so Spanish isn't an issue for me. I usually just go and spend a couple months in BOG and love it there, the weathers not so great but I don't mind. I will be writing in the BOG thread at some point soon.

I just spent two days in CTG and yesterday (a Tuesday) went to El Paraíso Marino. The area is indeed a little sketch, but nothing worse than Santa Fe or the like. At 10 pm on a Tuesday it was not dead but not full, at around midnight it filled up a bit. Once inside I felt completely safe, but again I speak Spanish fluently and feel I have good street smarts. The inside looks nice and there were easily, to my taste, a couple of 8-9's but a lot of 6-7's. Also pretty expensive, but I expected that going in. They have a pool that you can get in if you want, I didn't. They also have every girl available go up to you and introduce themselves as a line up. They also have hookahs, which I love, and a wide variety of of liquors and beers.

The rooms were spacious and clean and have a shower, and the price for the girl and the room were 450 k. Expensive I know, I would never pay that in BOG, but this chick was a 9 to me and I don't mind spending $113 (at current exchange rates) once in while for the experience. I even asked one of the waiters what the price for the girl and the room are when my chick went to the bathroom, and he quoted the same price, so do with that what you will. In the room she was great and very "entregada" and GFE, so much so my pelvis hurts a little from the session LOL. So no complaints besides the price on my part.

Overall, if I was willing to spend that kind of money I would definitely go again.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

GOW.

Cartagena had a few overcast days where it was not hot as fuck but I suppose that is why people go there. Spirit is flying from Orlando to CTG once again. That is the best way to get to the city IMO. You arrive earlier than other flights though the Orlando airport is a zoo. If you buy a one way ticket, you likely have to check in at the gate to get a boarding pass which is always fucking madness. You are less likely to have to go to the gate if you buy a round trip ticket and can get your boarding pass on line I have found. Fort Lauderdale is usually better than Orlando for checking in time wise but not by much. I have been having to fly Spirit because outside of an occasional great deal on other airlines, you are paying double in comparison price wise.

Once you get into Cartagena, there are new banners demonizing sex trafficking that I did not notice before. I did not see the Medellin style harassment though. Customs agents were friendly like they always were and the line moved along well. On checkout back out of Colombia, lines were not bad either and agents are pushing people to use the biomig machines. That may be why lines moved faster upon exiting.

I got the dreaded SSSS on my ticket. It is funny that on my trip to CTG I never had to remove my shoes but on the way back, I had to remove them three times. I was told on one flight that I flew unrelated to this one that the airline I was using did not participate in TSA precheck. I am not sure what that means. It sounds like if the airlines are not paying the TSA they are not allowed to do TSA precheck. For whatever reason, Spirit did not give me precheck on the return but priority boarding. There was no difference with that and regular boarding when I was in Lauderdale as the lines were short. This was probably the least busy I have seen airports for a long time.

The SSSS search resulted in them getting the blades off my razor and the spare blades I used. I have done 20+ flights with the razor and spares, and I was not alone. The counter was filled up with razors. So do not pack them in your carry-ONS now. Don't ask me why.

For the most part, Cartagena has not had a crazy good bakery despite their being an obvious demand for one. Well, they have one now. The places is called Melt. Their baked good is called a melte and I think there were four different flavors. Bakery is next to KFC on Carerra 2. We ate in the restaurant and were there at least an hour, and there was a line out the door the whole time. They are going to need a bigger store. Yeah, the meltes were damned good. This is a world class product although sadly the meltes are not that good when cold. You have to get them fresh. [URL]https://www.instagram.com/somos.melt/[/URL].

Ice cream wise, the wisdom was that the best ice cream was Crepes and Waffles. Sad for sure. But there is a small stand that sells gelato on the first floor in the Serrezuela mall, and it is awesome. The stand is made out to be a pink Cadillac and usually there is a small line there. Again, this is probably the only above average product of its sort in the city.

I get why there is demand for some of the island beaches like Bora Bora. You get the clear water and white sand. Thing is when I went snorkeling the undertow was so severe it took away from a lot of the enjoyment. Also, the trip out there was not so bad in the morning the ocean was calm but on the way back, if you are in a smaller boat, you are going to feel like you are on horse back as the boat bucks so much because of the waves. It is also an 1+ hour to get out there.

The biggest island off the coast is Tierra Bomba. My gal set us up a tour there. We got a nice tour of the fort and it was interesting. The fort is not as impressive as Castillo San Felipe but it was pretty impressive in its own right. The part I would return to is the beach right next to the fort. Yes, this beach has the same black dirt feel as that on Hollywood Beach, and the water is more dark than clear but the beach is protected from the waves so there is no undertow and it is really, really calm. I asked if the beach was always like this and was told yes. So if you just want to lay out or swim, it is perfect. It was also empty at 11 AM on Tuesday so it has that going for it as well.

A 20 minute walk from the beach is a hotel where we ate lunch. Sorry, I forgot the name. What made this hotel special is it had a fresh water pool which is pretty remarkable because Tierra Bomba has no fresh water on the island. Apparently, it all has to be shipped in from the mainland. Lunch was the typical but excellent island fare: fried red fish, coconut rice, avocados. If you have not had that dish, you are missing out.

And Tierra Bomba is just like 20 to 25 minute boat ride. Maybe it was the boat had more people than the one I had been on previously but the horse bucking feeling I had on the previous boat did not happen and the boat ride was pleasant unlike the return from the Rosario islands.

So, figured I would make report, though this was in Cartagena 7 months ago, so, oldish info. It was kind of funny, this was my first real mongering focused trip, and literally days after I booked everything non-refundable (cheapest), the Mayor of Cartagena issues a moratorium on prostitution in Old Town. Thought that was going to make finding women difficult, but showed up and the ladies were all out and about!

The first night went almost too well, as I found a serious cutie in less than 10 minutes. Set me back 400 K. The women out and about seemed innumerable at the time because I hadn't really taken the scene fully in yet. The next night brought things into better perspective, as I spent hours on the stroll in Old Town. There were maybe 75-100 women out in total throughout the night. Girls get scooped quick if they are a serious looker! All the good choices dried up on night 2 as it was getting very late, and so I took what was a 6/10 back to my room, and once her clothes came off that score dropped to a 5. Same thing with other nights, there are definitely 7's and 8's out there every night, but they are few and far between, so if you see something good, you've got to go for it instantly. As compared to Medellin's Parque Lleras which I would hit a few months later, CTG is definitely NOT as good as far as selection, but still not bad at all. Additionally, as opposed to CTG's Old Town, it was not uncommon in Lleras to see a very good looking woman sit there all night, even on different nights, without a single customer.

I really enjoyed Cartagena, and will be returning. I think it's a good mix of vacation and hobbying. Whereas, I found myself getting miserably bored during the day in Medellin, while breathing in sulfury air, allst while eating mostly mediocre food and not daring to leave Poblado on foot after dark. That being said, definitely going back to Medellin sometime too, haha.

Hey, do any of you know of any massage places and / or spas you'the recommend. Preferably ones that give decent to very good massages and a good time afterwards. Please let me know if you do. My PMs are always open if you want to use that.