reiterating a past tale of caution
About prenups and green cards and such.... I remember when my family was stationed overseas in Panama, our downstairs neighbor was a G.I. who had a Panamanian wife and a kid by her. You could tell the guy was at the end of his emotional rope with this woman, because he had a nasty attitude that reflected in his everyday facial expression. My family had finally secured housing on the military base and we were about to leave for the viewing of the house when all of a sudden the daughter came to our doorstep and said: "My mommy said I can come with you". I was thinking that things at home must have been so bad that at such a young age (even younger than I was at the time) that she was willing to do ANYTHING to get out of that household. That was an example of a foreign honey fucking things up BEFORE getting passage to the U.S. In my opinion, the guy should have had loud warning bells going off in his head before he married this woman.
the politics of presentation
Allow me to play devil's advocate...
One issue that should be examined, and which has been hinted on here by several members, is the importance of being honest with yourself and the girl.
Who are you and what do you represent to the girl/woman? Is your self-perception and her perception of you and her new life realistic? What do you expect of her and what does SHE expect of YOU?
A lot of guys take advantage of their new-found "celebrity" status in overseas locales to successfully woo women. There is nothing to be said against this, it is one of the reasons we go abroad as it is. Overseas and in nations where the dollar or euro go farther than at home, it is easy to climb 2 or 3 notches up the food chain and impress the local ladies.
But what happens in those cases when they come to the US (or UK, Germany, wherever) and discover that their "prince" is actually a working class Joe with a 8 year old car, a 2 room apartment and average pay allowing him to go out to dinner once or twice a month?
What happens when she sees that his social status in his home country doesn't correspond with her perception of his social status when she met him in her home country?
Of the failed intercultural or "mail-order" marriages, I am certain a lot of them were due to false advertising on the part of the man and/or disappointment/inflated hopes on the part of the woman.
I witnessed this often enough among Army buddies, coming back from places like Bolivia where as an E-6 sergeant living in an apartment with maid service etc they were "the man", but back on the ranch they were just an E-6 sergeant living a comfortable but hardly glamorous life.
I also witnessed this often enough in Ukraine, where the "mail order girls" had inflated expectations of life in the west and the guys did little to dispell these. Disappointment... even to the point of being considered a violation of trust... inevitable.
And ask yourself if the environment you are going to introduce her to is going to be a manageable one for your girl's personality. Army guys, who were often in the field for weeks or months on end, often had cheating, lonely wives. I knew guys banging an Air Force Major's bored and lonely Korean hottie and other guys whose Panamanian wives were fucking around. A lot of marriages were working, but a disproportionate amount weren't.
In Ukraine I knew a good-looking bride-seeking regular guy from Florida vacationing there and already working on getting a 3rd fiancee visa for a potential bride, the first two potential "fiancees" having gone absolutely bananas in Florida's murderously superficial "flashy" dating scene during their visits there, forcing him to send them home and inciting a great degree of paranoia in him regarding the selection process, so much to the point he was about to give up. The guy has become an absolute wreck, failing miserably at what would perceivably be one of the world's simplest tasks, finding a wonderful, marriage-worthy Slavic girl.
I think importing women is a risky and unnecessary venture... but many guys have different agendas than I do. Whether that agenda is perhaps starting a family or just as often, bringing home a trophy or a girl they couldnt get "back home", caution is advised. In any case, its not something to rush into without first making sure the relationship is built on solid ground and not just on hot air.
Dark- way off topic. No one is posting anyways
Believe it or not, I actually envy your situation in a way. Private transportation is one of the biggest tools that the corporate scumbags who run this country use to unknowingly enslave people. Many people spend a years salary buying a car new car-with 25+% of monthly income going to the car, another hefty chunk going for insurance (more scumbags), and $3.00 a gallon for gas (don't even get me started on those pieces of shit). And due to clever marketing, we think we are going to die if we aren't in this position.
People in this country are slaves, and they don't realize it. Most of their money comes from corporate scumbags, and goes to corporate scumbags in interest and bullshit consumer spending. Their "freedom" is only an illusion.
Bart9K
PS Disclamer of Hypocracy. I live 17 miles from the best job I could find at the moment and there is no public transportation where I live. I drive an old European Sedan with 225,000 miles on it, and will gladly keep pouring money into junkyard parts to keep it on the road rather than give over to the scum.
