Manila

[Goferring]

...This is her budget for her birthday party and she is asking for money. She showed me staying in a shack with leaky roofs. And she wants 10 K pesos for her birthday party -- Really?

It's always very convenient that itemised budgets always end up with a nice round number. Often the max withdrawl from an ATM, as in this case.

I note the comment at the top of the budget. Was she Mindanao Muslim? "In God's Will" or Inshallah is actually a polite way to receive but decline a request. Basically, I'm happy to help but God wasn't. 🙏.

Cheers. G.

[Aml3740]

I am sure many of us have heart to help out. For folks from US, 1000 Pesos is less than $20 which is probably a sandwich + drink cost in big cities in the US. Some of these girls don't understand the value of money. I got this from a girl whom I had met online and couldn't meet during my trip. This is her budget for her birthday party and she is asking for money. She showed me staying in a shack with leaky roofs. And she wants 10 K pesos for her birthday party -- Really?

Actually, living in a shack with a leaky roof is what a lot of people live in out in the province. It is normal and not really looked down upon in the way that most of us westerners would think. Have you ever noticed pictures of many of the girls on pinalove or similar websites dressed all up and the leaky shack in the background?

The reason everything is an emergency is that, in general, they do not plan ahead for anything. If they have 1 k pesos and someone in the family needs it, they give it. It takes some training to get a Filipina significant other to not do that. What I worked out with mine is setting up a checking account for them to put money in so that they physically don't have money with them other than for budgeted items, so that way they can have savings. But, these are my partners, not just some girl I met.

That budget for the party is kind of high. I did a christening party for my daughter and paid a lot less, and that was with lots of different types of ulam, three different cakes, decorations, entertainment, etc.

The other thing, from previous posts, is about 4 ps. It really isn't universal. My wife was widowed several years previous and moved to her province from NCR and applied for 4 ps when she got there. It took over 4 years for a slot to open up for her, by which time she didn't need it because we were married already. And the amount isn't much, at least in the province where she is. 500 per child per month and some sardines and rice. Considering kids need baon for school transportation and uniforms and such, they certainly aren't getting rich off that.

Sorry for the rambling entry.

[D Cups]

My first introduction to this cultural difference was around 2014, when a provincial girl who had been brought to me for about 3 years and became a regular, wanted a similar list of items for her son's 2nd bday. The list included p500 for a videoke machine rental for the day (p400), a bday cake (p400), and a whole pig for roasting on the spit (p1800). Her total requested budget was about 3000. The girl was good enough to make the request and bring it to my attention 2 weeks prior to the party. An agreement was struck: She would visit a few nights extra in the schedule before the party, to receive the money. For 2 weeks she was a cum-bucket.

The party was festive. The karoke machine was used all afternoon and evening. The pig-on-the-spit was delicious. At some point they brought the child out and sang Happy Birthday. They opened a few gifts that were brought for the child. The child was retired out of the area after that. The child spent 15-ish minutes at his own party on his 2nd Bday. Guessing he will never have any memory of it. After the child disappeared for the evening, the true drinking began. In my inebriated state, I asked one of the girl's aunts: Is this kind of party for a 2 year old for the child? Or for the adults? "Its for the community. Its who we are. If there is calamity even we might have the party". I thought bday parties were for the bday boy or girl. Silly me.

Also, the things that the girls are willing to do for a cake or some Empirador and juice, can be incredible. And they wait until the day before usually to bring it up, making it TODAY's EMERGENCY, requiring some additional cum-bucketing. Is that a term?

It's a great term, Westy. Might even have to coin it in the abbreviations: CBS Cum Bucket ****. Hahahahah cheers, mate.

[WestCoast1]

Nicely prepared budget. Birthdays are very important in PH. Beyond my understanding. Leaking roof would be my first concern than a celebration but I am not in that culture.

My first introduction to this cultural difference was around 2014, when a provincial girl who had been brought to me for about 3 years and became a regular, wanted a similar list of items for her son's 2nd bday. The list included p500 for a videoke machine rental for the day (p400), a bday cake (p400), and a whole pig for roasting on the spit (p1800). Her total requested budget was about 3000. The girl was good enough to make the request and bring it to my attention 2 weeks prior to the party. An agreement was struck: She would visit a few nights extra in the schedule before the party, to receive the money. For 2 weeks she was a cum-bucket.

The party was festive. The karoke machine was used all afternoon and evening. The pig-on-the-spit was delicious. At some point they brought the child out and sang Happy Birthday. They opened a few gifts that were brought for the child. The child was retired out of the area after that. The child spent 15-ish minutes at his own party on his 2nd Bday. Guessing he will never have any memory of it. After the child disappeared for the evening, the true drinking began. In my inebriated state, I asked one of the girl's aunts: Is this kind of party for a 2 year old for the child? Or for the adults? "Its for the community. Its who we are. If there is calamity even we might have the party". I thought bday parties were for the bday boy or girl. Silly me.

Also, the things that the girls are willing to do for a cake or some Empirador and juice, can be incredible. And they wait until the day before usually to bring it up, making it TODAY's EMERGENCY, requiring some additional cum-bucketing. Is that a term?

[WestCoast1]

I am sure many of us have heart to help out. For folks from US, 1000 Pesos is less than $20 which is probably a sandwich + drink cost in big cities in the US. Some of these girls don't understand the value of money. I got this from a girl whom I had met online and couldn't meet during my trip. This is her budget for her birthday party and she is asking for money. She showed me staying in a shack with leaky roofs. And she wants 10 K pesos for her birthday party -- Really?

I see from her budget an item for "Billy", for p2200. Guessing that is not her boyfie. A local stud who can bang several out of a girl for her Bday? Considering that many pinoy would want to help her with that for free, I am guessing that Billy is *THAT* good, and worth the 2200 (and provides multiple pops). Go team Billy!

Also, the cake, at p1000. Even big city girls are happy with a standard sized cake from Red Ribbon or the grocery store, complete with icing and Bday greeting written on it, is p700 or less. Province p550 or less. She's thinking BIG (guessing she might describe Billy the same way).

[Dg8787]

I am sure many of us have heart to help out. For folks from US, 1000 Pesos is less than $20 which is probably a sandwich + drink cost in big cities in the US. Some of these girls don't understand the value of money. I got this from a girl whom I had met online and couldn't meet during my trip. This is her budget for her birthday party and she is asking for money. She showed me staying in a shack with leaky roofs. And she wants 10 K pesos for her birthday party -- Really?

Nicely prepared budget. Birthdays are very important in PH. Beyond my understanding. Leaking roof would be my first concern than a celebration but I am not in that culture.

Did you contribute or not?

[KbNagar]

Very true. Girls from Samar and Mindanao are very poor and with huge family obligations. .... You can but help out some of these girls.

I am sure many of us have heart to help out. For folks from US, 1000 Pesos is less than $20 which is probably a sandwich + drink cost in big cities in the US. Some of these girls don't understand the value of money. I got this from a girl whom I had met online and couldn't meet during my trip. This is her budget for her birthday party and she is asking for money. She showed me staying in a shack with leaky roofs. And she wants 10 K pesos for her birthday party -- Really?

[KbNagar]

... It's pretty simple: if they didn't work, the girls' wouldn't do it.

...Most of us have seen groups of girls sitting around, glued to their phone for hours at a time with the occasional burst of conversation. They aren't playing Solitaire. They are farming guys and then splitting the proceeds.

Cheers. G.

Gofer as always nails it. This is true. There are folks who fall for it. They see all foreigners as a horny ATM.

[Dg8787]

Especially in the province. A lot of the working girls are from the province, especially in far out places like Samar or Mindanao. And I don't mean a city like Cebu or Davao. If you have never been out there and seen what life is like, you can probably never understand the pressure these girls are under. Family ties are strong, and they do have a sense of responsibility to take care of their families, and they are often expected to. Life is really at the subsistence level, or just above that.

Work laws and protections are pretty much non-existent. If you don't have skilled work, it is hard to get a job if you're over 30. There is a reason almost all of the workers in the mall are girls in their 20's. And, unlike western countries, it costs money to get the paperwork needed to get a legit job. So if you meet a girl's family and they are not working, this is probably why. If they don't have the ability to have their own business, they really probably can't find work. And, let's face it: in general, Filipinos aren't the best with money. Money comes and goes very, very easily.

This doesn't make their problems your problems. It is just the reason they are so eager to separate you from your money.

Very true. Girls from Samar and Mindanao are very poor and with huge family obligations. Before Covid my favorites were from Samar. Lately my favorites and with very nice bodies are from Mindanao. The Mindanao girls are extremely friendly. You can but help out some of these girls.

[Goferring]

...This doesn't make their problems your problems. It is just the reason they are so eager to separate you from your money.

Many have pointed out the girls' real and BS reasons for requests. However, don't forget the one fundamental reason that these are plentiful: they work. Out of the thousands of stories sent out there will be simps galore who will send a few bucks. Guys also have to take responsibility for the requests actually delivering results. It's pretty simple: if they didn't work, the girls' wouldn't do it.

It's a numbers game. We've al been discussing how we receive requests as if we are the only guy who she is talking to. Of course, that's ridiculous. If she sends out a hundred requests and only a couple deliver, that's still a good daily income. Most of us have seen groups of girls sitting around, glued to their phone for hours at a time with the occasional burst of conversation. They aren't playing Solitaire. They are farming guys and then splitting the proceeds.

Cheers. G.

[ThreeInches]

Had one the other day. Couldn't buy food just had water for dinner. Sent me a vid of her crying. OMG.

Water (fasting) is better than pagpag.

In all seriousness there are ways that single mothers or the extremely poor can get aid and most likely already receive it. If they don't qualify for 4 Ps it means their income is above the provincial poverty line. Pantawid Pamilyang Pilipino Program (4 Ps) is more common in rural areas. They receive things like a healthcare subsidy, education subsidy, and its suppose to be money / cash card but often takes the form of a rice subsidy in the provence.

The aid in the form of a rice subsidy is the reason why most filipinos will say " I used to eat rice with salt" or "I eat rice with no ulam. " because most extremely poor filipinos do have access to rice subsidies. The LGU's know exactly who is poor enough to warrant the aid and they do give these families at least a rice subsidy even if they don't fully qualify for 4 ps they often times do still receive a rice subsidy. So if they say they receive no help but are truly in the bottom most demographic this is most likely not true. If they do not qualify for 4 ps then you know they have "some" money coming in from somewhere. I think the common foreigner impression stemming from their hubris some men believe they are the only hope and that these ladies have no options but that just isn't true. It is just easier to get the money and a lot extra from a foreigner than try to jump through the hoops to qualify for these programs.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FI3y80Utu64 - this explains what 4 Ps is.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYmYD1S1eZg - This lady talks about her experience with the Malasakit Center, These are free healthcare centers called Malasakit Centers upon assessment they can receive up to 50,000 pesos in medical assistance.

[Aml3740]

Especially in the province. A lot of the working girls are from the province, especially in far out places like Samar or Mindanao. And I don't mean a city like Cebu or Davao. If you have never been out there and seen what life is like, you can probably never understand the pressure these girls are under. Family ties are strong, and they do have a sense of responsibility to take care of their families, and they are often expected to. Life is really at the subsistence level, or just above that.

Work laws and protections are pretty much non-existent. If you don't have skilled work, it is hard to get a job if you're over 30. There is a reason almost all of the workers in the mall are girls in their 20's. And, unlike western countries, it costs money to get the paperwork needed to get a legit job. So if you meet a girl's family and they are not working, this is probably why. If they don't have the ability to have their own business, they really probably can't find work. And, let's face it: in general, Filipinos aren't the best with money. Money comes and goes very, very easily.

This doesn't make their problems your problems. It is just the reason they are so eager to separate you from your money.

[PhilJoy]

At the same time, most of the girls truly have no money and go through a number of financial issues, such as inability to pay rent or hospital bills or no money for food.

Completely understand MoonShot and I compensate them accordingly when I'm in the PH.

Afterwards, when they hammer you with dodgy financial requests regarding their sick kids, it does get tedious. I generally say it's the father of their children to compensate them for their kid's needs and explain I'm not responsible for a child that's not mine. In a nice way.

I also explain that if I gave money to every Filipina who requested it, I'd be broke. Thankfully, my regular girls just appreciate my 'compensation' when I hook up with them. Phil.

[Zippos]

Had one the other day. Couldn't buy food just had water for dinner. Sent me a vid of her crying. OMG.

😂. I had that one few years back. Mine lived in Boracay. I just said, "I hope you are not drinking salty ocean water filled with feces" didn't pull that stunt again.

Speaking of financial support requests. Look at the attached picture, my spinners cousin. Met up with them in iloilo on my last visit. Tried to hook me up with one of their friend for 5 k php for few hours just to come and hangout with me and "if she likes me" she will consider spreading her leg open. I just said fuck-off politely. Now asking me for help for her lesbian sister's medical support. I salute their never ending efforts for sure 😅.

[Goferring]

Had one the other day. Couldn't buy food just had water for dinner. Sent me a vid of her crying. OMG.

I guess I should have added in my favourite reply: " Oh no, that's terrible. Will you still need help when I arrive back? We can meet up in my room and we can help each other. ".

😍. G.