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Thread: Stupid Shit in the Philippines

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  1. #276

    Homeless

    Quote Originally Posted by PilotPaul  [View Original Post]
    Were these pickups at self-serve laundries?

    I have noticed that at the Angeles City laundries that I frequented in and around my apartment that the counter staff were all fucking ugly. Maybe they employ the fuglies as any hotties would get hit up by the visitors.

    PP.
    One was outside Malate Church reading a book. The other was in Mabini St. I also picked up an ex goo go dancer in Angeles wh was sleeping in a park. Nothing ugly about them, just entrepreneurs waiting for their luck to change. Nothing at all unusual about being homeless in the Philippines.

  2. #275
    Quote Originally Posted by PedroMorales  [View Original Post]
    I picked up, on two separate occasions, hot homeless babes in laundries in Mabini St. Ther only downside was on both occasions I had very early flights the following morning. Karma or something.
    Were these pickups at self-serve laundries?

    I have noticed that at the Angeles City laundries that I frequented in and around my apartment that the counter staff were all fucking ugly. Maybe they employ the fuglies as any hotties would get hit up by the visitors.

    PP.

  3. #274

    Wandering Barefoot Around the Backstreets of Cebu City

    Quote Originally Posted by ChochaMonger  [View Original Post]
    What a peculiar kit bag to carry around the Philippines!
    Yes, it is rather a peculiar kit bag to carry around the Philippines. Many mongers have been busily restocking their bags, in the hope that flights will resume to Shitsville soon. Nurses outfits, complete with surgical masks, face shields and rubber examination gloves are a new inclusion this season. The kit bag also contains a packet of 30 x morning after pills, since this medication is not readily available in the Philippines, it being a strict Catholic country. No self-respecting monger can relentlessly pursue BBFSCIP with an LBFM with out them. He does not want 30 half-caste bastards wandering barefoot around the backstreets of Cebu City looking for their Australian passports.

  4. #273
    Quote Originally Posted by EngineDriver  [View Original Post]
    Well, actually no. You are mistaken. LOL. I've been to Flipsville many times and always had lots of fun fucking those LBFMs. The ABC Hotel in AC is one of my favourite hotels in the world and I've stayed in many a fine pile in RWML. I have sent in hundreds of complimentary FRs from the field as evidence. They are all there. I am going to give you some advice which you always seem to give other mongers. RTFF.

    Many of us in RWML have perfectly normal lives where we undertake commerce, have normal families and friends and interests outside of fucking four foot high, brain dead nincompoops. We are not addicted to travelling around the Philippines with a kit bag (containing enema kits, strap ONS, bull whips, blindfolds and ball gags) in the relentless pursuit of BBFSCIP with LBFMs. We don't have a spare 18 hours a day to incessantly chat and text with hundreds of hookers in Flipsville, which could lead to nothing. The wheels of commerce do not wait for mongers to finish BBFSCIA. LOL.

    Please don't get me started on PhDs. Hahaha. That happens to be one of my favourite topics. Most of the PhDs awarded these days are not worth the paper they are printed on. Many once fine educational establishments in RWML have been hijacked by the rabid green left or that Trojan Horse, the ubiquitous Confucius Institute. Any dimwit can get a PhD in 2-3 years now, with minimal effort, as long as the topic conforms to one of these general themes; The Great Climate Change Hoax, Feminism or some Pro-Sino rubbish praising Chairman Mao's vision. In my country, the PhD student will also get a nice tax payer funded scholarship for writing a thesis about gender pay gaps, gender fluidity or carbon capture and storage (that is, catching smoke and burying it). LOL.

    I have so little faith in the ability of Ph DS that I will not even interview them for a job. Most in my country fall into these three typical professions. Low level civil servant, academic or perennially unemployed.
    All a Ph. The. Means is that someone has studied a particular subject more than others and is sanctioned by a degree-granting institution. It has nothing to do with intelligence and everything to do with fortitude and discipline. For me, it enabled a nice income with lots of time off to monger in the last fifteen years. To someone like ED it is an impossible task so he is quite possibly jealous or at least rather misguided is his faulty assumptions about me, Filipina women in general and his general outlook on life. Not pointless, drama, Jackson. Honesty and truth.

  5. #272
    Quote Originally Posted by EngineDriver  [View Original Post]
    Well, actually no. You are mistaken. LOL. I've been to Flipsville many times and always had lots of fun fucking those LBFMs. The ABC Hotel in AC is one of my favourite hotels in the world and I've stayed in many a fine pile in RWML. I have sent in hundreds of complimentary FRs from the field as evidence. They are all there. I am going to give you some advice which you always seem to give other mongers. RTFF.

    Many of us in RWML have perfectly normal lives where we undertake commerce, have normal families and friends and interests outside of fucking four foot high, brain dead nincompoops. We are not addicted to travelling around the Philippines with a kit bag (containing enema kits, strap ONS, bull whips, blindfolds and ball gags) in the relentless pursuit of BBFSCIP with LBFMs. We don't have a spare 18 hours a day to incessantly chat and text with hundreds of hookers in Flipsville, which could lead to nothing. The wheels of commerce do not wait for mongers to finish BBFSCIA. LOL..
    What a peculiar kit bag to carry around the Philippines! I suppose the enema paraphernalia is for flushing the remnants of undigested balut from the rectums of the LBFMs before bareback anal. Otherwise, things could get a bit shitty between the sheets, to put it mildly. The strap-on dildos are for the LBFMs to peg the monger after giving him an enema to evacuate his constipated bowels thoroughly. The bullwhip is for giving the nasty LBFMs obedience training. A crack here and there keeps them sharp when performing various tricks on all fours and on their backs. The blindfolds are to spare them from seeing what is about to be rammed up their asses, and the ball gags are to muffle their howls.

    If a LBFM makes it to the USA, it is usually because she has a PhD in BBFSCIP with a minor in BBBJCIM.

  6. #271

    Laundry Stories

    My turn now.

    Years ago, Playboy had one of their dumb fictional stories about a guy going into a London laundry and having torrid sex with some babe who was in there getting her panties cleaned. Upshot was London laundries got hordes of horny dudes in doing their laundry and looking for the hot babes.

    I picked up, on two separate occasions, hot homeless babes in laundries in Mabini St. Ther only downside was on both occasions I had very early flights the following morning. Karma or something.

  7. #270

    Stupid is as stupid does vs. presenile dementia

    Years ago I was staying at the Pan Pacific Hotel in Malate. Was in a hurry to take my clothes to the cleaners located right next to the hotel. It was early afternoon. I walked next door, dropped the clothes off, then went back to my luxurious room, took a nap. Now its early evening, time to go out. Hey, where the fu_k is my wallet? Think, man, think. Where could it be?? You guessed it. Left it in the pocket of my shorts that I took to the laundry. All kinds of things go through your head. Shot over there, walked in the door, the girl looked at me, smiled, opened the drawer of the counter and handed me my wallet. I did a quick check, everything was still in there. Yes, there are still plenty of honest workers in the P. I. (can't remember if I reported this before, but a good reminder to self anyway.) Yes, I did tip generously. Party on.
    Last edited by Mr Hawaii; 05-20-20 at 07:58. Reason: grammar

  8. #269
    Quote Originally Posted by CenTexCrash  [View Original Post]
    Not sure if this counts as stupid shit, but I'll take a shot.

    One fine day in MNL started with handing in some laundry to this place near Guizo Suites before poorly attempting to monger. Best way was punch in Vito KFC on Grab and walk next door. The next morning I was hopping on a bus to AC so was counting on making this smooth.

    Was planning to hit EDSA that night but get back to laundry back to hotel. Traffic was bad getting from rooftop bar near Burgos back to laundry. They close at 9 pm. Got ther at 9:15 pm. Steel roller door with no hours or contact posted to find out what time they open in morning, tossing a wrench in my plans.

    In my fit of rage, two 10 yo boys begging for change after I told them NO, had the audacity to reach into my pockets for a handout and I raised a fist and got loud and they backed away like I had some kind of attitude problem. I was ready. Part of it was still freshly raged by previous night's massage girl rifling $60 USD out of my pockets. Took a breather, glared at homeless people and ordered a new GRAB to move along to hotel then monger scene.

    Next morning, checked out of hotel en route to NAIA to catch Genesis bus to AC, but with added trip to retrieve laundry. So called for a GRAB back to the Vito KFC around 10 am, hop out walk toward opened up laundry and walking toward their door, feel a ugly feel.

    One of my two phones squirted out of my pocket as I climbed out of that Kia Optima. The laundry lady is mesmerized by my panic attack. Calling Grab, the error voice says "We do not accept phone calls from your (plus one USA) country code. Good bye. " Eventually tear thru app to find option to email Grab to reach out to driver. May take all day to get results. FML.

    Laundry lady has my clothes ready and telling me to breath. I'm thinking how I'm going to lose an entire night in AC from waiting for Grab to track down driver. So much spinning in my head.

    Then.

    Horn sound. Look outside. It's my driver. I do an epic happy dance. He hands me the phone, I offer cash probably $10 in pesos and guy waves it off saying "Don't worry, I gotchu. " How did he know where to find me tho? Turns out when he was looking for a monger at KFC, the same colony of homeless people tipped him off saying they spotted a monger hop out of his car at KFC and immediately walk a few doors down to Red laundry. The same homeless people I tussled with 12 hours ago just bailed me big time. Funny how that works.

    I stride back into the laundry to grab my stuff, wind down my happy dance placing phone in my pocket and as soon as I did, laundry lady became Mom. "No! Bad monger! Bad bad monger! That's what got you in this mess in the first place! Put that phone in your backpack! Now!" I complied. "Now zip that backpack pocket shut!" I did. "Good monger, now you don't have to lose phones all day. " Once she was convinced I wasn't going to make a further ass of myself I was free to go. Ordered a new Grab bound for NAIA, grabbed a bite at Wendy's, hopped on the Genesis Bus and Grab App agent pinged asking if I was still needing to reach out to driver with my phone in his car, and told them he swooped back around done deal to close the help ticket.
    Your story breaks about every stereotype conceived here!

    Wondering if you bought a bowl of rice for the homeless helpers?

    Great story.

  9. #268
    Not sure if this counts as stupid shit, but I'll take a shot.

    One fine day in MNL started with handing in some laundry to this place near Guizo Suites before poorly attempting to monger. Best way was punch in Vito KFC on Grab and walk next door. The next morning I was hopping on a bus to AC so was counting on making this smooth.

    Was planning to hit EDSA that night but get back to laundry back to hotel. Traffic was bad getting from rooftop bar near Burgos back to laundry. They close at 9 pm. Got ther at 9:15 pm. Steel roller door with no hours or contact posted to find out what time they open in morning, tossing a wrench in my plans.

    In my fit of rage, two 10 yo boys begging for change after I told them NO, had the audacity to reach into my pockets for a handout and I raised a fist and got loud and they backed away like I had some kind of attitude problem. I was ready. Part of it was still freshly raged by previous night's massage girl rifling $60 USD out of my pockets. Took a breather, glared at homeless people and ordered a new GRAB to move along to hotel then monger scene.

    Next morning, checked out of hotel en route to NAIA to catch Genesis bus to AC, but with added trip to retrieve laundry. So called for a GRAB back to the Vito KFC around 10 am, hop out walk toward opened up laundry and walking toward their door, feel a ugly feel.

    One of my two phones squirted out of my pocket as I climbed out of that Kia Optima. The laundry lady is mesmerized by my panic attack. Calling Grab, the error voice says "We do not accept phone calls from your (plus one USA) country code. Good bye. " Eventually tear thru app to find option to email Grab to reach out to driver. May take all day to get results. FML.

    Laundry lady has my clothes ready and telling me to breath. I'm thinking how I'm going to lose an entire night in AC from waiting for Grab to track down driver. So much spinning in my head.

    Then.

    Horn sound. Look outside. It's my driver. I do an epic happy dance. He hands me the phone, I offer cash probably $10 in pesos and guy waves it off saying "Don't worry, I gotchu. " How did he know where to find me tho? Turns out when he was looking for a monger at KFC, the same colony of homeless people tipped him off saying they spotted a monger hop out of his car at KFC and immediately walk a few doors down to Red laundry. The same homeless people I tussled with 12 hours ago just bailed me big time. Funny how that works.

    I stride back into the laundry to grab my stuff, wind down my happy dance placing phone in my pocket and as soon as I did, laundry lady became Mom. "No! Bad monger! Bad bad monger! That's what got you in this mess in the first place! Put that phone in your backpack! Now!" I complied. "Now zip that backpack pocket shut!" I did. "Good monger, now you don't have to lose phones all day. " Once she was convinced I wasn't going to make a further ass of myself I was free to go. Ordered a new Grab bound for NAIA, grabbed a bite at Wendy's, hopped on the Genesis Bus and Grab App agent pinged asking if I was still needing to reach out to driver with my phone in his car, and told them he swooped back around done deal to close the help ticket.

  10. #267
    Quote Originally Posted by WickedRoger  [View Original Post]
    Sadly Ed has likely had a bad experience with pinays and is now trying his best to persuade others they are not worth the bother.
    Well, actually no. You are mistaken. LOL. I've been to Flipsville many times and always had lots of fun fucking those LBFMs. The ABC Hotel in AC is one of my favourite hotels in the world and I've stayed in many a fine pile in RWML. I have sent in hundreds of complimentary FRs from the field as evidence. They are all there. I am going to give you some advice which you always seem to give other mongers. RTFF.

    Many of us in RWML have perfectly normal lives where we undertake commerce, have normal families and friends and interests outside of fucking four foot high, brain dead nincompoops. We are not addicted to travelling around the Philippines with a kit bag (containing enema kits, strap ONS, bull whips, blindfolds and ball gags) in the relentless pursuit of BBFSCIP with LBFMs. We don't have a spare 18 hours a day to incessantly chat and text with hundreds of hookers in Flipsville, which could lead to nothing. The wheels of commerce do not wait for mongers to finish BBFSCIA. LOL.

    Quote Originally Posted by WickedRoger  [View Original Post]
    The USA one is now completing her PhD. Can you match that ED?
    Please don't get me started on PhDs. Hahaha. That happens to be one of my favourite topics. Most of the PhDs awarded these days are not worth the paper they are printed on. Many once fine educational establishments in RWML have been hijacked by the rabid green left or that Trojan Horse, the ubiquitous Confucius Institute. Any dimwit can get a PhD in 2-3 years now, with minimal effort, as long as the topic conforms to one of these general themes; The Great Climate Change Hoax, Feminism or some Pro-Sino rubbish praising Chairman Mao's vision. In my country, the PhD student will also get a nice tax payer funded scholarship for writing a thesis about gender pay gaps, gender fluidity or carbon capture and storage (that is, catching smoke and burying it). LOL.

    I have so little faith in the ability of Ph DS that I will not even interview them for a job. Most in my country fall into these three typical professions. Low level civil servant, academic or perennially unemployed.

  11. #266
    Quote Originally Posted by GoodEnough  [View Original Post]
    Usually, I pretty much ignore ignorance such as that expressed in your post. In this case however, it's tough to do. I have two doctors here; both are licensed to practice in the US, and both studied here before going to the US for their fellowships. The major medical centers in major cities in the country are general quite modern and quite competent.

    GE.
    I know nurses in Australia, UK and the USA all of whom had to pass stringent exams and test to be qualified to practice in those countries. Sadly Ed has likely had a bad experience with pinays and is now trying his best to persuade others they are not worth the bother. But those overseas have had to work hard. The USA one is now completing her PhD. Can you match that ED?

  12. #265
    Quote Originally Posted by GoodEnough  [View Original Post]
    Usually, I pretty much ignore ignorance such as that expressed in your post. In this case however, it's tough to do.
    GE.
    Quote Originally Posted by EngineDriver  [View Original Post]
    Unfortunately humor, sarcasm and wit is lost on many mongers.
    Quote Originally Posted by EngineDriver  [View Original Post]
    Sheeesh. If you dislike Messrs Reacharound's and Trainwreck's creative masterpieces so much, why do you so effortlessly keep falling into their trap? Every single time! LOL.

    Sarcasm, acerbic wit and humor is lost on many mongers. LOL.
    The Gang of Eight fall into the trap. Every. Single. Time.

  13. #264
    Quote Originally Posted by EngineDriver  [View Original Post]
    Got to agree with your post there. Pilipina medicine is a combination of old wives tales, Malay tribal folklore, religious superstition with a tiny bit of western knowledge thrown in. And this is practiced by the educated ones from medical school. The fact that an MD is working as a nurse says it all. I assume she had to cheat her way through nursing school in the US to work as a RN. Showing a piece of paper with "MD" stamped on it from a backwater college in Flipsville is not going to get you past the nursing board in RWML.
    Usually, I pretty much ignore ignorance such as that expressed in your post. In this case however, it's tough to do. I have two doctors here; both are licensed to practice in the US, and both studied here before going to the US for their fellowships. The major medical centers in major cities in the country are general quite modern and quite competent.

    GE.

  14. #263
    Quote Originally Posted by TurdyCurdyOne  [View Original Post]
    You're in the provinces and you will be c**k blocked. Province Filipinas, except hard core Prosties are not going to damage their reputation in the community to do what you CLAIM you are doing.
    Its a large province of hundreds of thousands. The girls are long-time regulars from differing Brgy. Its not a case of 'everyone knows everyone', and I don't keep a hotel just up the street from their compound. Other Board members have met my girls. No blocking. They have graced the PG. However, Covid has changed things. Its a different situation. However, in general, I agree with your thesis regarding provincial girls.

    Quote Originally Posted by TurdyCurdyOne  [View Original Post]
    Good luck no need to reply.
    Thought I would. Everyone smile.

  15. #262
    Quote Originally Posted by GoodEnough  [View Original Post]
    I rarely respond to those who denigrate anything and everything about this country all of the time,

    GE.
    Hahaha. Here's my favourite:

    (Sitting in a random bar somewhere).

    "The Philippines suck, pinas are stupid thieves, the food is disgusting and it's impossible to find a decent hotel".

    "Really? How long have you been coming here? ".

    "Oh, about 15 years".

    🤔 🙄.

    G.

    P.S. I thought my rant was over?? I think this 'social distancing' is starting to get to me. 😁 😡.

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