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[QUOTE=KeenEyeJoe1;3044644]In a way, I suffer from the same fossilization of thinking. I miss the old Manila. The LA Cafe and Amazonia Bar from 20 years ago, full of thin gorgeous women for low compensation rates. Sidewalks full of sexy-dressed streetwalkers. Harrison Plaza, Ermita's Robinson Mall, the ESDA bar complex and plenty of Ermita district low-rent rendezvous bars that were fertile grounds for in-person first meetings. Mall workers who loved bantering with us and were up for meeting for dinner after their shifts ended. Freebees from oodles of semi-desperate Pinays searching online at dating websites, MIRC chat rooms, ICQ, and Yahoo Messenger for someone to rescue them from their miserable lives. Same thing in Cebu City and Davao City. Like shooting ducks in a zoo pond..[/QUOTE]How do you the changes for serious girlfriend? I have spent my last two years with a Filipina who was far better that whatever western woman but I broke with her because she was too lazy. So now I start again looking for tradwife.

[QUOTE=DonMalo;3045099]How do you the changes for serious girlfriend? I have spent my last two years with a Filipina who was far better that whatever western woman but I broke with her because she was too lazy. So now I start again looking for tradwife.[/QUOTE]You broke up with her instead of training her? People should lay out their expectations at the beginning.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;3045133]You broke up with her instead of training her? People should lay out their expectations at the beginning.[/QUOTE]My conclusion is that they are untrainable, or at least it has to be a compromise, some things, especially sex related can be easily taught, other ones involving house chores, cooking, cleaning, etc are well known by them, and therefore there is no need to even pay attention or at least try to do it your way. At first you get mad, but after a while you learn that in fact is the other way around, you're the one getting trained to their ways, at least partially, and that's due mostly to the fact, that you can't argue with stupid people.

I'm thinking that probably the writers of Star Trek got inspired to create the Borg by visiting PH.

"Resistance is futile!

[QUOTE=OldAndUgly;3045157]My conclusion is that they are untrainable, or at least it has to be a compromise, some things, especially sex related can be easily taught, other ones involving house chores, cooking, cleaning, etc are well known by them, and therefore there is no need to even pay attention or at least try to do it your way. At first you get mad, but after a while you learn that in fact is the other way around, you're the one getting trained to their ways, at least partially, and that's due mostly to the fact, that you can't argue with stupid people.

I'm thinking that probably the writers of Star Trek got inspired to create the Borg by visiting PH.

"Resistance is futile![/QUOTE]She was loyal and family oriented but lazy. She just laid on her bed after her work was done. She always promise that after marriage and stop her work, she would be a good housewife. I asked her to show it is true before a marriage. In two years of relationship she was not ready to do it. A big waste of time. She was from city, youngest daughter and she even never cooked or did other house chores. She gave all her salary to her parents and her mama was the one cleaning her small room. And she was really scared to have kids over 30 y old, as she was 27, maybe more than one should born on her 30+. That fear come from western propaganda against pregnancy that they see on socmed. She was loyal and good and even abroad to Europe with me (when she was 26).

This is why I want to try with one full month in areas that aren't common for tourists and try to date a young woman without socmed.

I had a GF for 2 years with a girl from Biliran. We weren't together often, but we met several times. But I couldn't train her. It seems incredible but after two years of knowing each other she has never managed to caress me, not even after asking repeatedly. He just wanted pure sex and that was it. But it had to be just me asking. Once I asked her for a caress 4-5 times, she wasn't able to give it to me so I left her. I couldn't carry on a relationship like that. An incredible but true story.

[QUOTE=JonesLover;3045196]I had a GF for 2 years with a girl from Biliran. We weren't together often, but we met several times. But I couldn't train her. It seems incredible but after two years of knowing each other she has never managed to caress me, not even after asking repeatedly. He just wanted pure sex and that was it. But it had to be just me asking. Once I asked her for a caress 4-5 times, she wasn't able to give it to me so I left her. I couldn't carry on a relationship like that. An incredible but true story.[/QUOTE]Two words _ Move on.

_ Phil.

[QUOTE=JonesLover;3045196]I had a GF for 2 years with a girl from Biliran. We weren't together often, but we met several times. But I couldn't train her. It seems incredible but after two years of knowing each other she has never managed to caress me, not even after asking repeatedly. He just wanted pure sex and that was it. But it had to be just me asking. Once I asked her for a caress 4-5 times, she wasn't able to give it to me so I left her. I couldn't carry on a relationship like that. An incredible but true story.[/QUOTE]Are you sure she even knew what you meant? It seems many folks get caught up that since they can mimic words in English that they have understanding, which half the times they don't.

Last month I went to Puerto Princesa with a chick who works at a call center in AC. We were in the van on the way to the Underground River and stopped at a hotel to pick up more people. In front of the hotel was a Shakey's. I asked her if she wanted to eat at Shakey's tonight. She said no. I did not say anything else about it. When we dropped the people off in the afternoon I asked her why she did not like Shakey's. She said she liked it. I said but this morning when I asked if you wanted to eat there you said no. She said I did not understand what you were asking. I said then why give a random answer instead of asking for clarification. Well we ended up going to Shakey's that night and while there she said it was her first time eating at Shakey's and she liked it.

So she went from not wanting to go, to liking it, to it being her first time (so she could not have known whether she liked it or not.) You guys give these folks too much credit simply due to you hearing English coming out of their mouths. That does not mean they actually understand it. So you may have broken up with the chick simply due to a miscommunication.

[QUOTE=JonesLover;3045196]I had a GF for 2 years with a girl from Biliran. We weren't together often, but we met several times. But I couldn't train her. It seems incredible but after two years of knowing each other she has never managed to caress me, not even after asking repeatedly. He just wanted pure sex and that was it. But it had to be just me asking. Once I asked her for a caress 4-5 times, she wasn't able to give it to me so I left her. I couldn't carry on a relationship like that. An incredible but true story.[/QUOTE]Do you mean that she was not clingy outside sex? Like not hugs nor kisses often? If she offered sex often and she took good care of you, where is the problem? It is better sex instead of clingy like western men that can endure 2-3 without sex their husband. And Filipina usually take more care of their partner.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;3045269]Are you sure she even knew what you meant? It seems many folks get caught up that since they can mimic words in English that they have understanding, which half the times they don't.[/QUOTE]Unfortunately this is not the case. At my age I need sex and love. But she just wanted sex only and she was passive, when I took her hand so that she could touch me, then she withdrew it. Ahahaha She wanted rough sex of any kind. She was hungry for sex and wanted it all the time, even in very early morning. But it was me who had to do it and not her. Hahahhaha Many Filipino girls are really weird.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;3045269]Are you sure she even knew what you meant? It seems many folks get caught up that since they can mimic words in English that they have understanding, which half the times they don't.

Last month I went to Puerto Princesa with a chick who works at a call center in AC. We were in the van on the way to the Underground River and stopped at a hotel to pick up more people. In front of the hotel was a Shakey's. I asked her if she wanted to eat at Shakey's tonight. She said no. I did not say anything else about it. When we dropped the people off in the afternoon I asked her why she did not like Shakey's. She said she liked it. I said but this morning when I asked if you wanted to eat there you said no. She said I did not understand what you were asking. I said then why give a random answer instead of asking for clarification. Well we ended up going to Shakey's that night and while there she said it was her first time eating at Shakey's and she liked it.

So she went from not wanting to go, to liking it, to it being her first time (so she could not have known whether she liked it or not.) You guys give these folks too much credit simply due to you hearing English coming out of their mouths. That does not mean they actually understand it. So you may have broken up with the chick simply due to a miscommunication.[/QUOTE]I learned that long time ago, even if my GF understands everything, she may not speak out her mind completely, what I mean is that she has it clearly in her head, but spills it out only partially, which many times leads to confusion or misunderstanding. It is like asking is it dark or still daylight outside, and she answers: Yes.

I'm explaining on daily basis that I cannot read her mind, and for the sake of her future, not just for me, to think about how what she's saying is understood by the people outside her head.

And I was observing this type of behavior a lot in many filipinas, and of course also the fact that they will give you an answer (mostly yes) even when they don't understand a thing that you're saying.

About what Don Malo is saying: mine does all the chores, but because I'm also fucked up in the head, I redo, or do them when she's not around (she takes offense), because she's not capable of doing them right, and not willing to change her ways to make her life easier. Like for example putting a lid on the frying pan when frying fish is a lot easier than cleaning the splashed oil of everything in a 3 ft radius, including the walls and the window, and the curtains, components that don't have nothing to do with, and shouldn't be involved into the cooking process.

[QUOTE=OldAndUgly;3045366]I learned that long time ago, even if my GF understands everything, she may not speak out her mind completely, what I mean is that she has it clearly in her head, but spills it out only partially, which many times leads to confusion or misunderstanding. It is like asking is it dark or still daylight outside, and she answers: Yes.

I'm explaining on daily basis that I cannot read her mind, and for the sake of her future, not just for me, to think about how what she's saying is understood by the people outside her head.

And I was observing this type of behavior a lot in many filipinas, and of course also the fact that they will give you an answer (mostly yes) even when they don't understand a thing that you're saying.

About what Don Malo is saying: mine does all the chores, but because I'm also fucked up in the head, I redo, or do them when she's not around (she takes offense), because she's not capable of doing them right, and not willing to change her ways to make her life easier. Like for example putting a lid on the frying pan when frying fish is a lot easier than cleaning the splashed oil of everything in a 3 ft radius, including the walls and the window, and the curtains, components that don't have nothing to do with, and shouldn't be involved into the cooking process.[/QUOTE]Sometimes these Filipino girls baffle me. I believe that in their life they have never exercised their brain to do things, such as the curiosity to learn. Yesterday I told a beautiful girl from General Santos that if she came to visit me in Davao, we could go to Samal together. Do you want to know the answer? "What is Samal"? I replied that it is an island and she asked me: "where is it". I replied that it is located a few kilometers from General Santos, in front of Davao.

These things make you lose your mind, but then you think that no one has stimulated her during her life journey and then you begin to understand more.

[QUOTE=JonesLover;3045336]Unfortunately this is not the case. At my age I need sex and love. But she just wanted sex only and she was passive, when I took her hand so that she could touch me, then she withdrew it. Ahahaha She wanted rough sex of any kind. She was hungry for sex and wanted it all the time, even in very early morning. But it was me who had to do it and not her. Hahahhaha Many Filipino girls are really weird.[/QUOTE]That has nothing to do with being Filipina. That has something to do with being human. In 1999 I had an American girlfriend who was that way. She was a divorced school teacher with a doctorate degree. She was just not used to someone showing affection towards her and was not comfortable to accept it or reciprocate it. I did the same as you and broke up with her. Being older and wiser, I would try to have more patience with the person and teach them or maybe even seek therapy or counseling for them if I really liked them. You should not just write them off as being weird.

[QUOTE=OldAndUgly;3045366]I learned that long time ago, even if my GF understands everything, she may not speak out her mind completely, what I mean is that she has it clearly in her head, but spills it out only partially, which many times leads to confusion or misunderstanding. It is like asking is it dark or still daylight outside, and she answers: Yes.

And I was observing this type of behavior a lot in many filipinas, and of course also the fact that they will give you an answer (mostly yes) even when they don't understand a thing that you're saying.[/QUOTE]And that is one of the many things that frustrate me about the Philippines. We were at the beach and I was trying to place an order. I was asking the lady which is better, the french fries or the chicken nuggets. All she kept saying was yes. And I kept saying yes what. Which is better? Then she finally said french fries, but only due to the appearance of being frustrated as well. Hell, maybe she was thinking why doesn't this mf know what he wants and wants me to decide for him.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;3045429]And that is one of the many things that frustrate me about the Philippines. We were at the beach and I was trying to place an order. I was asking the lady which is better, the french fries or the chicken nuggets. All she kept saying was yes. And I kept saying yes what. Which is better? Then she finally said french fries, but only due to the appearance of being frustrated as well. Hell, maybe she was thinking why doesn't this mf know what he wants and wants me to decide for him.[/QUOTE]A number of possibilities, and a possible fix in Phils.

1) Pinoy consider foreigners to be smart. They may answer YES to any question, even if they understood the question and have no idea the correct answer, and even if they didn't understand the question. Saying YES is a way to appear 'not stupid', and quickly get you out of her hair or on to a different topic. In the western culture if someone did this to your question, you'd consider them to be bullsh*ting you. In eastern culture it might be considered smart. As an example, on the street you ask someone if there is a Jollibee nearby. "Yes. There". She points south. You thank her and continue walking south. She walks north. She had no idea if there's a Jolli nearby, and she thinks she was clever in getting rid of you, and not appearing to be stupid. Later when you realize there is no Jollibee there, you think she's an idiot, and crazy. If you see this lady at a later time, don't bother confronting her about it. WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME? She will give you another answer that is also designed to minimize damage to herself, and you won't get any satisfaction from her answer. Venting won't help.

2) Pinay don't like making decisions, period. Girls here especially would rather that YOU lead and make the decisions. It doesn't matter what alternative you offer: Chicken / fries, Jollie / McDo, yada / yada / yada. She will want for you to decide. "Bahala ka (up to you)". Even if she's interested in making the decision, she won't admit that by making the decision. Such decision possibilities were culturally withheld from her since birth.

3) Pinay are not cultured or trained to understand or answer exclusive-or (XOR) questions. Sweetie, you want fries or nuggets? "Yes" (or Bahala ka / Up To You). This is her attempt to not answer your question. Or alternately, she did not understand the question and she won't admit that (save face). Exclusive or questions are meant to be answered with one or the other items. The respondent is expected to choose only one of the items (not both, which would be the Inclusive OR). Probably one of two things are happening: Either she doesn't care which item (fries or nuggets), or she just can't make the decision (culture) and wants to be left out of the process.

So here's the fix. Ignore the 'why' part of her strange non-answers. Approach the question like this: Sweetie I'm thinking either Jolli or McDo. Which would you like? If she answers either "Yes", or "Up to you", don't try to force a better / accurate answer. She's literally telling you in her terms to make the decision. THEN MAKE THE DECISION YOURSELF for the both of you. Don't hem, don't haw. Take her to Jollie or McDo. She's more interested in eating (which she loves) than decision-making (which scares her). She won't complain. Sweetie, chicken / rice or spaghetti for lunch? "Yes". OK, spaghetti then. "OK". Sweetie, the live band bar tonight, or the disco? "Bahala ka". OK, live band then. "OK".

Hope this helps.

[QUOTE=WestCoast1;3045538]A number of possibilities, and a possible fix in Phils.

1) Pinoy consider foreigners to be smart. They may answer YES to any question, even if they understood the question and have no idea the correct answer, and even if they didn't understand the question. Saying YES is a way to appear 'not stupid', and quickly get you out of her hair or on to a different topic. In the western culture if someone did this to your question, you'd consider them to be bullsh*ting you. In eastern culture it might be considered smart. As an example, on the street you ask someone if there is a Jollibee nearby. "Yes. There". She points south. You thank her and continue walking south. She walks north. She had no idea if there's a Jolli nearby, and she thinks she was clever in getting rid of you, and not appearing to be stupid. Later when you realize there is no Jollibee there, you think she's an idiot, and crazy. If you see this lady at a later time, don't bother confronting her about it. WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME? She will give you another answer that is also designed to minimize damage to herself, and you won't get any satisfaction from her answer. Venting won't help.

2) Pinay don't like making decisions, period. Girls here especially would rather that YOU lead and make the decisions. It doesn't matter what alternative you offer: Chicken / fries, Jollie / McDo, yada / yada / yada. She will want for you to decide. "Bahala ka (up to you)". Even if she's interested in making the decision, she won't admit that by making the decision. Such decision possibilities were culturally withheld from her since birth.

3) Pinay are not cultured or trained to understand or answer exclusive-or (XOR) questions. Sweetie, you want fries or nuggets? "Yes" (or Bahala ka / Up To You). This is her attempt to not answer your question. Or alternately, she did not understand the question and she won't admit that (save face). Exclusive or questions are meant to be answered with one or the other items. The respondent is expected to choose only one of the items (not both, which would be the Inclusive OR). Probably one of two things are happening: Either she doesn't care which item (fries or nuggets), or she just can't make the decision (culture) and wants to be left out of the process.

So here's the fix. Ignore the 'why' part of her strange non-answers. Approach the question like this: Sweetie I'm thinking either Jolli or McDo. Which would you like? If she answers either "Yes", or "Up to you", don't try to force a better / accurate answer. She's literally telling you in her terms to make the decision. THEN MAKE THE DECISION YOURSELF for the both of you. Don't hem, don't haw. Take her to Jollie or McDo. She's more interested in eating (which she loves) than decision-making (which scares her). She won't complain. Sweetie, chicken / rice or spaghetti for lunch? "Yes". OK, spaghetti then. "OK". Sweetie, the live band bar tonight, or the disco? "Bahala ka". OK, live band then. "OK".

Hope this helps.[/QUOTE]AND NAND OR NOR XOR, somebody should come up with a graphical representation, similar to the TTL gates.