The saga of the blue balls (part 1)
Hi all,
OK, long time lurker, time to give something back to this wonderful forum. Hopefully you find my posts, useful, entertaining and informative.
The saga of the blue balls (part 1).
I arrived into Manila in Q3 of 2021, having an impressive set of pandemic induced blue balls that really needed some pressure relief I set out on a mission to try and not explode by the first lady to touch me just to perform another nasal swab! Fate however decided to really test my perseverance, as before I got out of quarantine all of Manila was introduced to alert level 4 for the first time.
For those not here, alert level 4 means all bars and in dining restaurants are closed, this is important as it makes finding ladies to be with all the more difficult (excluding online dating). It also means that hotels and most resident complexes simply don't allow visitors which adds to the challenge.
Luckily I had been to Manila pre-pandemic so still had a few contacts which I had remained in contact with during my time away, which took care of my first challenge.
My second challenge was to find somewhere to find somewhere to have my lady friend take care of my blue balls, this actually turned out initially to be a bit of a problem.
To understand this second challenge, most of my lady friends who worked in and around Makati pre-pandemic, had moved back to their homes (outskirts of Manila) and given the strict approach to lockdown level 4, which included police checkpoints to limit movement, vaccine checks (this was when less than 10% of the population was vaccinated) and the general fear around, when I asked my lady friends for solutions they were unable to provide any.
So, I opted to try and resolve this myself, where I was staying it wasn't allowed for visitors, so hunting online I tried Agoda and AirBnB, along with any suggestions from my lady friends, one of whom suggested a well-known short term hotel Sogo. I called the hotel and was told sure I could book in but would need to be there for 10 days quarantine which seemed a bit excessive for a few hours of fun.
Agoda listed many hotels that you could book for a single night, but after calling 6-10 different ones, the pattern was the same, many were re-purposed into quarantine hotels and that was the only business they were open to at that time, if you were coming from within country you would still need to quarantine (only for level 4).
AirBnB was a lot more interesting, some places simply hadn't updated their status as not being available (didn't want the hassle), some would rent to you, but no visitors allowed, and then we had those who just didn't give a sh*t and wanted to make money. Well, I was desperate, vaccinated and needed relief so I struck a deal with one of the last group and received very detailed instructions on how to just walk by security, what to say if asked was I new, don't check in, go to the door and so on. Very exciting for more than one reason, price for the 1 night was I think around 4 K paseos (yes expensive, but it was all that was available at the time).
With the where and when sorted out, I just needed to secure my lady friend, I was super clear, I explained that I wanted her all night, I would pay a premium (6 K), pre pandemic I used to pay 2-4 K depending on duration and performance, and the deal was struck, she wanted me to tried go with her cousin who looked a bit tempting, I was given two options, one young (about 19-20) and the other older about 25-26 my friend was 22 I think. I chose the younger one and was assured that I would have a great time.
So the day (Friday) same for the deed, I turned up, the taxi with the lady turned up, and. The older cousin got out. WTF. Ah well, blue balls couldn't be turned back at this point, so we then proceeded into the room, which turned out to be a large tower block of small apartments, that was being used by a surprisingly large number of "military" that was drafted in to help enforce level 4 lockdown rules (the irony). So we get to the room, and 45 min later I was in a great mood, the older cousin might actually be a keeper, so feeling a bit hungry I opted to go and get a pizza for dinner before round 2, 3 and so on. Upon getting back and finishing the pizza, just as I was trying to initiate round two, I was informed by the older cousin that she would be going home now. WTF. This was not what was agreed, so needless to say, while a little less under pressure, I was not happy. To be continued.
And the saga of the blue balls concludes.
That night I returned to where I was staying and promptly informed my lady friend that I was very unhappy with the whole cousin setup, I informed her of the hassle I went through to find and book a place and that while the deed was good, it wasn't what I needed to properly take care of my severe blue balls.
My lady friend had the right reaction and immediately begged forgiveness and was willing to do anything to make up for my disappointment. She offered to find a venue and would personally come to take care of me herself, things were looking up, even if I was paying a premium for the experience.
I said OK, come and take care of me, so we arranged to meet near P. Burgos street, close to a famous hotel that is "so good", I turned up and then so did my date on Saturday, she said that she heard that a short term hotel was still in action, so I said OK, let's try, as we walked to the hotel, it must have been obvious from my massive blue balls why we were going there, but before we got to the door we got ushered into a taxi, with an explanation of "no charge, we bring you", so we were dropped extremely close, but back street and then issued into a lobby where I was informed, to present ID, vaccine papers and 3.6 K (I think) for the room which would be for an overnight stay, although we were not going to stay overnight, the 3.6 K included (included 1 k deposit which I would get back if we didn't wreck the room.).
So 5 hours later, after and an excessive amount of energetic sex and several pops, I was finally relieved of the ownership of blue balls (RIP). My lady friend had redeemed herself, and given me faith back in her services, we headed back to reception where I received my 1 K deposit back and was informed that next time I would receive a discount.
And do you know what? I did actually receive discounts in return visits and also free "upgrades", so much so that I honestly thought I was going to get issued a frequent flyer card.
I am not naming specifics too much given that Manila is at high risk of returning to L4 given the current rise in COVID numbers, so I need to keep options open in case I am forced to repeat the above story.