General Info

[QUOTE=Mr Enternational]So I was ready to ask for the bill when she asked, "Can I get something for my sons first? " I told her no. Her mouth dropped. She asked why. I kept telling her because I said no. After she asked a few more times I said, "Because it is my money. " I had to explain to her that it is really bad manners to ask a man who is out with you to buy something for your kids or anyone who is not present with the two of you.[/QUOTE]There's a lot of good responses to this already but here's a few more thoughts:

1) It's possible some of these low-estrata girls are a bit "inculta" about these dating niceties. The ideology of much of the colombian poor is "nothing asked is nothing gained," especially when it comes to interacting with the gringo or richer colombianos.

2) Stop arguing with the girls. I mean it. Just stop. :) It's completely pointless and a waste of time, it will accomplish absolutely nothing. If a typical colombiana thinks the sky is green, there is no argument or point in the world that exists that can convince her otherwise. Doesn't matter if she's estrata 1 or 6, they're ALL flaky like that! So don't even try, it only pisses her off even more; conserve your time and energy.

3) Instead of arguing with logic which almost NEVER works with colombianas, fight fire with fire, or in this case, bullshit with bullshit. If you're really interested in seeing her again, come up with any excuse to dangle her along. Tell her you'd be more than happy to buy her son a gift once your Colombian friend pays back the money he owes you "mañana." The next time you see her, tell her your card is not working. And after that, maybe your cell phone got stolen, lol! "Que pena contigo pero [insert bs story here]" is your friend. Just like the locals do, use it every single day in Colombia!!

One of us here has to "take one for the team" and use the "indecent proposal" strategy. It's something I've been thinking about as I lose patience with putting up with the flakes and the bs. It's always about these chicas putting us on the spot. Wouldn't it be fun to turn the situation around and place the pressure right back on them? ;) You want a gift? Sure, come back to my place and the happier you make me, the bigger the gift for your kid/mom/sister/cousin blah, blah. I'm sure most chicas would be shocked and run away, but at least you save your time (and possibly money depending how they react) and you get them to show their true colors one way or the other. I know that seems very jerk-like behavior but this is Colombia, it's a man's world, you can get away with saying almost anything as long as you're not being sexually explicit with what you think are non-pros. Remember that even with their local novios, sex can be somewhat of a "negocio" or transactional in nature. So if you have some cojones, push their annoying requests right back at them with your "special request."

I guess that I go through so many chicks and have had so many that think just because we are going out and doing something together that it entitles them to a shopping spree on me that I finally blew and had to tell them about themselves. And I find that the ones who are always begging for shit are the ones who are not going to fuck you. It's always the chicks who don't want anything but to spend time with you who have the best character and are going to give you a fucking of a lifetime.

I have made posts before about a girl in Cartagena who thought I was going to bring a Playstation 3 and countless games for her son (actually she did put out like a champ and all she wanted in the end with her full order of dick was a side order of patacones). Then there was the chick in Bogota who suckered me into taking her mom and adult son to dinner with us and afterward she wanted me to give her son money for his architecture supplies. Then the ones who wanted me to top up their phone. (Why the hell do you think I'm going to pay your phone bill for you to call another cat? I'll call you b*ch, you don't need to worry about calling me.) And who was that who went to Exito with the girl and her mom and they thought he was going to pay for the basket of shit that they just picked out?

See all you saw in the story from yesterday was the pizza. Sure it was just 8000 pesos for the pizza but all of this shit together has been brewing. That was just the straw that broke the camel's back. I just got fed up with the fighting fire with fire and beating around the bush thing and had to be direct. If it would not have been with her then it would have been with the next person.

[QUOTE=Mr Enternational]

As far as girl friendly. I think all hotels are girl friendly.[/QUOTE]Maybe most, but not all. In August I spent a night at Morrison Hotel Bogota - upscale and I enjoyed a night sleeping alone in a beautiful, immaculate and spacious room. But specific policy at this hotel forbids overnight guests for security reasons. Even if the policy was waived, or you took a girl up for a short time, you would have to walk your girl out after a session because one cannot exit via the elevators without the key card.

It was ok for me in this case as this was a stopover before returning home and I was tired and a bit mongered-out after two weeks on the prowl throughout Colombia that had ended with several days hobbying in Medellin..so I preferred to spend that evening resting and happily reliving my prior adventures in my mind rather than look for a final pull for the trip.

[QUOTE=Phunluv]2) Stop arguing with the girls. I mean it. Just stop. :) It's completely pointless and a waste of time, it will accomplish absolutely nothing.

... 3) Instead of arguing with logic which almost NEVER works with colombianas, fight fire with fire, or in this case, bullshit with bullshit. If you're really interested in seeing her again, come up with any excuse to dangle her along. Tell her you'd be more than happy to buy her son a gift once your Colombian friend pays back the money he owes you "mañana." The next time you see her, tell her your card is not working. And after that, maybe your cell phone got stolen, lol! "Que pena contigo pero [insert bs story here]" is your friend. Just like the locals do, use it every single day in Colombia!! ...[/QUOTE]Now this is great advice!! Guys, read it twice, learn it, practice it.

In Colombia, more than any other place I've ever hung out, the BS really flows, and the arguing and logic go out the window in most cases.

Have fun with it.

[quote=bango cheito]cultural differences my ass. no self-respecting colombian man would be caught dead supporting a kid he knew wasn't his, nor would he get any respect from his peers if he were idiot enough to do so.[/quote]really? really?

buying a pizza for a chica at the end of a meal to bring home to her kids?

wouldn't really consider that supporting a kid.

i highly doubt anyone would get shunned by his peers for this.

[quote=ricker]really? really?

buying a pizza for a chica at the end of a meal to bring home to her kids?

wouldn't really consider that supporting a kid.

i highly doubt anyone would get shunned by his peers for this.[/quote] ricker i am with you on this one.a small kind gesture that would have cost the guy less than 10 dollars.

Well, you do as you like, but with me theirs not bullshit. I normally always get along well with the girls, I do not play all those stuiped fucking games. Fuck that.

[QUOTE=Ricker]Now this is great advice!! Guys, read it twice, learn it, practice it.

In Colombia, more than any other place I've ever hung out, the BS really flows, and the arguing and logic go out the window in most cases.

Have fun with it.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Ricker]Now this is great advice!! Guys, read it twice, learn it, practice it.

In Colombia, more than any other place I've ever hung out, the BS really flows, and the arguing and logic go out the window in most cases.

Have fun with it.[/QUOTE]Ricker:

Agreed. This is good advice with the casual encounter which is the majority type on this board.

And I also liked the following from Phunluv's post:

[QUOTE=Phunluv] You want a gift? Sure, come back to my place and the happier you make me, the bigger the gift for your kid/mom/sister/cousin blah, blah. I'm sure most chicas would be shocked and run away, but at least you save your time (and possibly money depending how they react) and you get them to show their true colors one way or the other.[/QUOTE]That's a basic tenant of Negotiations 101: "If I do this favor for you, what will you do for me?"

Bingo! Door open.

(Not meant to be used in all situations; ie, with regular girls in potential long term relationships. But then again it's my experience with the regular girls I've dated that they would never make such a request.)

Good stuff.

All the best, Schwmm

[QUOTE=Phunluv]There's a lot of good responses to this already but here's a few more thoughts:

One of us here has to "take one for the team" and use the "indecent proposal" strategy. It's something I've been thinking about as I lose patience with putting up with the flakes and the bs. It's always about these chicas putting us on the spot. Wouldn't it be fun to turn the situation around and place the pressure right back on them? ;) You want a gift? Sure, come back to my place and the happier you make me, the bigger the gift for your kid/mom/sister/cousin blah, blah. I'm sure most chicas would be shocked and run away, but at least you save your time (and possibly money depending how they react) and you get them to show their true colors one way or the other. I know that seems very jerk-like behavior but this is Colombia, it's a man's world, you can get away with saying almost anything as long as you're not being sexually explicit with what you think are non-pros. Remember that even with their local novios, sex can be somewhat of a "negocio" or transactional in nature. So if you have some cojones, push their annoying requests right back at them with your "special request."[/QUOTE]Evertyhing you wrote here sounds so rigth.

I am volunteering to put in practice your last suggestion.

Will come back with a report and pics in a few weeks!

Could be ugly! LOL

[quote=ricker]really? really?

buying a pizza for a chica at the end of a meal to bring home to her kids?

wouldn't really consider that supporting a kid.

i highly doubt anyone would get shunned by his peers for this.[/quote]no local would put up with that kinda fucking shit from a woman. not even if you had a kept woman. if a guy here has money to burn and is really a sap he may do nice shit for a girl's family and such, but no girl would even think of hitting a guy up for something like that. as a matter of fact, the only times i hear of such a thing happening here in colombia there is always a foreigner in the mix.

my personal rule, i hate going dutch, i don't even do it with me friends, but i expect any girl i'm going out with the contribute to the festivities with something material. if we're gonna make use of the apartment i pay rent on to fuck in, the least she could do is show up with a bottle of apple wine or something. :p

and never ever ever straight up give money to a girl apart from the actual expenses of going out. if she wants to fuck for money she can cut a deal with me like any other ho so we both know what we're getting out of it, end of story. the only circumstance where a girl should be getting money like that is if she has had your baby.

[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]NO local would put up with that kinda fucking shit from a woman. Not even if you had a kept woman. If a guy here has money to burn and is really a sap he may do nice shit for a girl's family and such, but no girl would even THINK of hitting a guy up for something like that. As a matter of fact, the only times I hear of such a thing happening here in Colombia there is ALWAYS a foreigner in the mix.

My personal rule, I hate going dutch, I don't even do it with me friends, but I expect any girl I'm going out with the contribute to the festivities with something material. If we're gonna make use of the apartment I pay rent on to fuck in, the least she could do is show up with a bottle of apple wine or something. :P

And NEVER EVER EVER straight up give money to a girl apart from the actual expenses of going out. If she wants to fuck for money she can cut a deal with me like any other ho so we both know what we're getting out of it, end of story. The ONLY circumstance where a girl should be getting money like that is if she has had YOUR baby.[/QUOTE]If im eating a cheeseburger, slice of pizza, hotdog or chuzo, I have no problem getting one for my chica's kid(if she has one) at home who maybe missed out on dinner, even 2 pieces, 1 for abuela watching the kid for us. Good gestures beget good gestures, Get more bees with honey than you do with salt. I'm not talking getting another entree from lleras and believe me nobody is getting over on me for this.

I have plenty of women come over and none of them came over with shit, lol but I dont mind that 1/2 the time im just happy that they showed up as fucking flaky these b1tches are!

Now giving money to these girls straight up? For what? Just because they asked? No Way, you will open a pandoras box you can never shut. I do though supply money for an occasional girl who I want to see and towards the end of the conversation finishes "i want to see you too, but I don't have any money for the taxi" Hey if a girls going to get all dolled up and get in a taxi to come see me in my apartment. what the F is measly 8-10mi to have a beautiful paisa sitting on my lap? If it early enough most of my girls will take the metro and then a cab from there.

We are not Colombians, we are gringos(most of us) We can be "somewhat generous" when applicable just be very clear of the line of "somewhat generous" and getting over, because some gringos have a hard time distinguishing and that's where the trouble starts.

[QUOTE=You Can]Well, you do as you like, but with me theirs not bullshit. I normally always get along well with the girls, I do not play all those stuiped fucking games. Fuck that.[/QUOTE]Well great, congratulations, I'm glad that works for you.

I too would love if everyone was just straight up, but in reality, especially with the young Colombianas, it just doesn't work like that.

There are good and serious chicas that I am sincere with, but with the flighty ones, I've learned to be flighty right back.

No lectures, no arguments, just playing the game.

It's easier, it's fun, it works and always with a smile.

Good luck Sgt Hulka

[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]NO local would put up with that kinda fucking shit from a woman. Not even if you had a kept woman. If a guy here has money to burn and is really a sap he may do nice shit for a girl's family and such, but no girl would even THINK of hitting a guy up for something like that. As a matter of fact, the only times I hear of such a thing happening here in Colombia there is ALWAYS a foreigner in the mix.[/QUOTE]Yes, a Colombian guy will buy for his 'kept woman', jewelry, clothing, maybe a car, a nice apartment, etc, but God forbid she ask for a pizza for her kid.

I have had several married Colombian friends with their amantes on the side and these chicas always asked for things in their loving, flirting, sexy ways.

And was usually for much more than a pizza.

Big deal, IMO only, if a chica asks for something you either say yes or no. No anger needed, no lecture needed.

Just depends on the situation whether you buy or not.

[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]NO local would put up with that kinda fucking shit from a woman. Not even if you had a kept woman. If a guy here has money to burn and is really a sap he may do nice shit for a girl's family and such, but no girl would even THINK of hitting a guy up for something like that. As a matter of fact, the only times I hear of such a thing happening here in Colombia there is ALWAYS a foreigner in the mix.[/QUOTE]Bengo:

While I agree with you that this is 100% true and I agree with Mr Ent's original reaction that it's bad manners I think the point raised in this discussion is that IF, the er, uhh, girl (to put it politely) has the nerve to make such a request than turn it on her! Play it and beat her at her own game.

An initial sexual romp for the price of a pizza? Veerry interesting.

All the best amigo!

Schwmm

[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]If we're gonna make use of the apartment I pay rent on to fuck in, the least she could do is show up with a bottle of apple wine or something. :P [/QUOTE]Case in point. I am at my girl's house in Cali now. She is 28, no kids, has her own house. 3 bedroom, 2 bath. TVs in every room. Of course like every other place in Cali she does not have hot water. And me being North American, I totally detest showers in ice cold water. Yesterday we went to the mall and I bought an electric shower head. Before we went her neighbor made a list of the 3 things we needed to get and he would install it for free. (When I bought it the girl at the store also said someone could come out and install it for free. She gave me that info along with the warranty info.) I bought the most expensive one at 43K pesos. The wiring cost me 8K for 4 meters and the plug for the outlet was 1K. (He wanted to install it plug-in style although I would have just ran it to the wiring on the overhead light if I was doing it.) We came home and it took him a little over an hour to put it in at 10pm. (Next time I will surprise his 10 year old son with a remote control car.)

Today I will go and we will have a mirror cut for the bathroom. Right now she has this small mirror hanging where there is already a space cut for one 5 times the size. She doesn't even want the mirror. She said why do you need to see your whole body? But since I can stay here when I want and do not have to pay anything I am going to fix this place up and give it maximum comfort for us both.

Last night at the grocery store I spent 90K on groceries. Yesterday she cooked for me, but today is my day to show her how it is done. As a matter of fact she is washing my clothes right now and I am getting ready to make us a late breakfast. These are the kind of chicks that I don't mind spending money on. Ones who: 1. Don't ask and 2. Have potential. The other fly-by-night, needy, begging, too-good-for-the-bus-when-it's-your-money ones can go to hell. They are good for going out having a good time, and fucking, but as far as any other kind of anything (food for other family members, books, phone bills paid....) forget about it.

[QUOTE=Bango Cheito]And NEVER EVER EVER straight up give money to a girl apart from the actual expenses of going out. If she wants to fuck for money she can cut a deal with me like any other ho so we both know what we're getting out of it, end of story. The ONLY circumstance where a girl should be getting money like that is if she has had YOUR baby.[/QUOTE]Exactly. I had a girl in Barranquilla who wanted me to give her money because her daughter needed books for school. She said that she tried getting a loan elsewhere but was not able to secure one. I suggested that she do a search and consult the child's father.

Whenever a non-pro tries to hit me up for money I explain to them straight up that they can be either a novia, which entitles them to certain privileges such as going out and having a good time together, taking trips, and spending quality time getting to know one another. Or they can be a hooker. I will give them money strictly for having sex, but there will be no other time spent together. I will only call them when I want sex.